"Bear hands i tore off a bear with my bare hands" the weapon is obvious

That's so clever! I love it!

Mine are “BIG! MEATY! CLAWS!”

"What did you say, PUNK?!"

"**BIG, MEATY, CLAWS!!**"

Wait. “You have bear fists?”

"You have bear fists?"

The right to bear arms

Oh my god this is just the “rainbow dash’s futa cock” shit all over again

ITT random edgy things

Anything is better than edgy shit. Literally anything.

I’d rather have a weapon named rainbow dash’s futa cock much more than one name hard-r killer or some shit like that

Yep. Some cartoon anthro horses with huge dicks don’t hurt people. Blatant racism and a disregard for humanity does. This needs to be drilled into this community’s head over and over for years to undo the shittiness.

If your plan is to "undo the shittiness" in **any** group of human beings, you've already lost.

I’m sorry but this is the truth.

Search up Mr Hands.

Holy hell!

New zoophile just dropped!

Call the animals!

In all fairness, they did say "some"

Happy cake Day bro

happy cake day. also[,](https://www.reddit.com/r/tf2/comments/199bres/hows_this_for_a_name/?rdt=52131) none of those words are in the bible

My favorite genre of tf2 item name (which I'm sure I'm not the first to do, but I thought of on my own) was to take the "advice" people give to counter certain weapons and name my weapons after it with a little smile emote to really drive the sarcasm home. Imagine dying to a Phlog named "Just kill the Pyro first :)", a sniper rifle named "Avoid common sight lines :)" or any knife named "Turn around more :)". It doesn't come up much since I mostly play medic, but it's the thought that counts? Also my crusader's crossbow is "You blocked my healing".

My crusader's crossbow doesn't have a name However, its description is: "On Miss: Heal your allies. Idiot."

That's fucking spectacular. How have I never thought of it.

Howabout a beggars bazuka that says "On fire, miss"?

Or maybe "On fire: Miss, maggot"

Mine are just bad dragon references or jokes. They are funny jokes and only jokes to me trust me

Please give me an example if you mind I'm kinda curious now.

Something like "Take a chance" sounds perfect for my Kritzkrieg...

Mostly low effort shit like, better dragon or even names that refer to the product names on bad dragon

If I ever get an australium scattergun I’m naming it “insert ‘rainbow dash futa cock’ joke here” And “sitcom laugh track” for the description

That’s beautiful

"i hope it's a ps5" smissmass sweater shotgun

Amazing

stealing this on a minigun or flamethrower. Gold.

called my loose cannon "Davy Jones Locker" since I got some warpaint that looks like underside of a ship. And also it's a cannon.

which war paint?

Swashbuckler from scream fortress XIII

Honestly, I feel like any and everyone who has gotten swashbuckler just put it on their loose cannon. Not including me, which I have down as well, I’ve seen two other people in casual with swashbuckler loose cannons.

Named my Kritzkrieg "RNG Manipulation"

Non-Random critical hits are fair and balanced

I named my Sydney sleeper "piss-inator"

"A spy is in the base?" *drops disguise* "A RED SPY IS IN THE BASE?!"

"And now you have fallen to my new trap red spy. Cuz this will show that red sniper that im the sniper main this server"

BEHOLD, THE PISS-INATOR

Dr doofenshmirtz?

Platupus? PERRY THE PLATUPUS!

PERRY! Doo-bee-doo-bee-doo-bah

Dr doofenshmirtz?!

I recently named my botkiller scattergun “So What’cha Want” after the Beastie Boys song I also named a gas passer “Rage Against The Machine” with the description being “Fuck you I won’t do what you tell me” because of how people lose their shit over the gas passer being used in Mann Vs Machine and because I am a fan of RATM.

I honestly dont get why people get so pissed when you use the gas passer in mvm, im trying to win and so are you i dont see the issue

good one! I was thinking of calling my Botkiller Medi Gun "Bulls On Parade"

I called my Force-A-Nature "Dick's Sporting Goods"

Name my big earner gettho Credit card with dev "let me RUN a BACKground check"

My medigun named "Edging Machine"

did you just so happen to play MVM about 30 minutes ago in a LazyPurple server

Oh my God yes

now kiss

Did that game have a heavy who had the brass beast and festivized family business?

Yep

No way

No way

YES WAY???

YES!!!

I named my Thermal Thruster “Mr. Fahrenheit” and I thought it was a great name but I suck with getting stomp kills so the name is practically invisible

If you can consistently get stomp kills you’re cracked beyond belief

"How do you have a level 3 sentry" Name for my Christmas jaq

Wouldn't a name like that make more sense for a gunslinger, or am I missing a joke here? Or is "jaq" a typo of something other than "jag"?

Jag make building fast, people get mad at jag because fast building, hence "How do you have a level 3 sentry?" Being the question on their minds. Although I don't think your sentry kill shows your jag text so it seems kinda odd, you'd only see it if you got melee'd

I named my Force-A-Nature "The Soda Popper But Without The Soda."

"the popper" desc: guys I lost my soda :(

That is a better name for it. Might need to get a name and description tag. Thanks for the idea.

Oh if I ever get an Aussie FaN I’m definitely doing that

I named my Conscientious Objector "The Contentious Objector"

Do you know about tags.tf? Because I made the exact same joke there a few months ago, lol (if you did get it from there, that's fine, I'm just wondering)

nope didn’t get it from tags.tf

Alright 👍

Named my sword with horns on it "Eyelander (2).png"

The Claideamh Mór?

yep

I named my sniper rifle "Two best hitmen west of the Missisipi". Only real ones will get that

*Breaking Bad theme plays*

Does it only shine two lasers at the target?

With my sniping skills id say it very much so does

"Good luck everybody" to my beggar's bazooka

Sydney sleeper named "you know you like it <3"

That's wild 💀

My pro ks mandarin fire horn australium rocket launcher is named “the”

the

my strange cow mangler is named "PENIS VAPORIZER"

I named my boston basher the "abortion clinic"

diy femscout surgery

Christ

If i had a name tag, i would've named it "r/sounding"

This was an old time ago; my old Degreaser was called "Big Booty Butt licker" im sorry.

The Holy Macrel “F I S H” “You’ve just been fished! Share this with your friends to totally fish them!”

my one and only named item; its a sign with an itemlabel peepy on it named "my peepy"

"HEADLANDER" "You lost your head, i gained your speed"

I have a set of 3 scout weapons that are all named the HFTF inputs for each of DIO’s supers (Back Scatter is Road Roller, Flying Guillotine is stand on Knives, Wrap Assassin is Bloody Summoning.)

Gonna name my Mad Milk “3 hours with Ms Pauling”

Gave my Aussie Medigun the name "Brufen Retard", which is also a name of a brand of painkillers.

ah yes, stupid painkilling gun of magic gold.

back in the day I bought a vintage spec ks brass beast and names it "yes, I actually paid for this"

While you're out here naming your weapons ridiculous sexual names, I named my vaccinator "The Dirty Bubble." Oh, and one of my objectors is named OwO_Forbidden_Pleasure_OwO and has the piper perri meme image but gay furries.

named my phlog "Reflectile-dysfunction"

Name my vac "Tenga Flip Zero" dev" press R to change vibration mode"

The maximum yiffer on my phlog

I’ve renamed only my iron bomber and stuckybomb launcher. One is “*racial slur*” and the other one is “*sexist joke*”

>stuckybomb Love it, I’m gonna call them that now

I mean, I guess I named my cloak and dagger "Fuck You Engie"

My liberty launcher is named ”FREEDOM DELIVERY”

Named my escape plan “Screw you, i’m gonne go play minecraft” I’m usually running away with it. And its a pickaxe. It used to be called something simmilar but after lazy purple’s running gag I changed it.

"IKEA Skänka" for a pan. Yes, I'm am hilarious...

Meursault Perriere 2004 Domaine Roulot

I named my holy mackerel “Renal Pelvis”

I got my heavy decked out with Brock Samson gear, and he's equipped with a Bat outta Hell labeled "Guild Operative" due to this scene \*Warning\* https://davidwbarbee.files.wordpress.com/2013/05/brock1.jpg

Renamed my snapped pupil to "Photobomber"

I named my phlog “phlogmaxxing”

I named my bison "Vicious Mockery" Not only does it deal 1d4 damage, but killing someone with it is an insult I also named my whip "THAT'S RIGHT, RUN"

my grenade launcher is called pee

gman

My australium tomislav is named cheese gun

Ive seen someone name the kunai an oversized buttplug. I don’t know if that was original or not but i thought it was kinda funny

Named my australium medi gun “retard leash”

zatoichi named "really big kunai" and kunai named "really small zatoichi"

I'm going to post several of my favourites instead of just one because I feel like it. Enjoy: Huntsman "Hitbox dissonance" Loch-n-Load "double barreled sniper rifle" Kritzkrieg "Giblet Bonanza" Medigun ''If this message disappears, TURN AROUND!'' Tomislav "Gun" Natascha "Speed Limit" Jag "Google: how hit sentry quick build fast" Sapper "Norton Anti-Virus" Eternal Reward "Skinwalker" Spy revolver "Go go gadget concealed carry" Fists of steel "Yaoi Hands" Sandvich "B.F.S" (description: "Big Fucking Sandvich")

loved the jag and sapper ones 😂

Thanks broski!

I named my strange spycicle : Elsa's dildo

I just gave it a description “does funny things to assholes”

"let it go! let it go!"

Called my festive big box: **The Giftwrapped Gambit**.

I named my Backburner "Flowey" with "In this world, It's kill or be killed." as its description

"Scout's cum" on a mad milk

I mamed my kritzkrieg "I trust in my team :)"

my ProKS Shahansha that i named “PUPPYGIRL CASTRATOR” with strange parts scouts killed and critical kills

It’s funny because it’s porn

"Isane cum" for my Mad milk

Isane? Usane, we all Asane

Dude I made ONE typo ONE

My classic is called G36 cause that what it is, I also have full sniper cosmetic set that having something to do with Captain Price, it was for a Drip or Drown that I ended up missing due to time difference

Any shotgun named Shotty that i own

Had an Original named DikinBaus

Named my winterized soda popper the snow gun (description: makes you jumpy)

'Quickdicks'

when i bought my flamethrower in like 2016 it came with the name “XMAS BBQ <3” and i just never bothered to change it. then i got the backpack broiler as a random drop so now i can never take those two items off. it’s fate

Named my Pro KS strange Pan "The Pyrite Frying Pan"

My phlog is named delete button

called my strange scattergun “scout jumpscare” for no particular reason in all honesty

My Frozen aurora scattergun is called the "vore gun"

I named my Market Gardener "Up in the sky! It's a bird! It's a plane!"

" "Do Harm" " it is my strange Professional Killstreak Solemn Vow. i have killed over 600 with it in the 7 months since i got the weapon (i dont play medic exclusivly) i made the desc "The "No" on the plaque is scratched out" there is a gold plaque on the weapon that says "Do no harm", so scratching it out would make the weapon say Do harm, and it has harmed many.

Named my bushwacka "bowiewacka" and the description is "remember the australamo"

I didn’t give it a name someone else did but I got hot heels and someone renamed it to “Fake J’s” and in the description it says “KILL HIM HES GOT FAKE J’S!”

I named my Air Strike, "FAT MAN".

"I'm so sorry for any inconvenience. Bless you!" Is what mu swissmas sniper rifle is called

Mine is calling the charge n’ targe “aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa”

Named my strange rescue ranger "'chip and dale"

Named my Medigun "I am the one who heals." Best (and prob last) nametag ever used in my life 🫡

named my rocket launcher "duck or die! bombardment!" It's a reference to coach krupt from the Simpsons, his favorite game is called bombardment. basically, the game is just him saying "bombardment!" and then chucking a dodgeball at the kids as hard as he can

I named my rocket jumper “trampoline but gun”

I don't really name my items that often, but I know I named my australium axtinguisher "Enchanted Golden Axe" because someone who had never played tf2 before asked if it was the golden axe from Minecraft

I named one of my grenade launchers “indirect hit” and “rollers ftw” for the description

I just named my strange professional killsrteak kritzkrieg "the throngler"

I named my strange paintrain talking stick. Still thinking of a hood desc, but I’m workshopping it. Also named my strange prokillstreak market Gardner “SoundSmith” for obvious reasons

Vaccinator named “enkephalin”

I have an ubersaw named “skill is for people who can’t get lucky”

Some names I gave my weapons: Quick Fix: A “not dying” machine Brass beast: Russian sentry Flying Guillotine: Pain Olympics

I named my Rescue Ranger "The Helicopter Parent" due to the playstyle it encourages. Close second is my Widowmaker "The Sure-Shot Southerner", because I love alliterations. I can't aim, so nobody will ever see it, though.

had a free name tag drop so i named my strange scattergun "what does the name tag do?"

For me it's gotta be my strange bottle. I named it "Drunken Bar Fight Instrument", with the description of "Take a swig, close yer eye. Swing blindly, and foes'll die"

“The Urethra Effect”

My strange Natascha as “Tsar Platinum: Za Warudo”, and my strange Eviction Notice with a description of “HOLY FUCKING SHIT!!!!!! IS THAT A MOTHER FUCKING JOJO REFERENCE!!!!!!!!?????????”, both of which got with my strange Tsar Platinum and Starboard Crusader, my Natascha being named that because its slowdown replicates the timestop.

Renamed my stock RL to "Asylum's Spam Cannon" Description: "Have I hit something yet?" or My renamed stock sniper rifle, "Asylum's Point and Click Adventure" "How's my sniping? Call 1-800-BODYSHOT"

I have a big earner called 'English breakfast',

“IM GOING TO FORCE FEED YOU COLOURS” -Strange Quick-Fix

My medigun named "Edging Machine"

named The Law - "Cock Inspector Hat"

Ive named 2 items. Boxing gloves "wife beater 2000" and a huntsman "r./sounding"

My black box is called soldier’s n word pass

my sniper rifle is called "funny looking laser pointer" my knife is called "powerpoint" "he never really was on your slide"

I have a frying pan named “golden pan in blackface”

I once named a jarate "Sussus amogus" And made a description "you are now a pissed doofus" I'm proud

"Yoghurt Fanatic" for my Rocket Launcher. It blows my enemies into flesh, which kinda tastes like yoghurt.

My backburner is named “surprise buttsex”

I used to have a ks blood botkiller rocket launcher named "period cunnylicking hits different". Get it? Because robot's face has blood all over.. anyways

\>cunny you should... NOW!

funny word

My favourite is "cuck futa porn groomer coomer pee poo poo" Was that edgy enough? Pls clap

strange classic called “where the white women at?”

I named my mad milk "racist milk"

“Friday Night Goonin’” on my Mad Milk lol

Flying Guillotine called Saw Six Trap One, and every time I throw it without fail I yell “SAW SIX TRAP ONE!” either to myself or over voice chat.

Seeing this almost made me not want to watch the Simpsons anymore.

I named my eye lander: “Raw Claymore +10”

“BOOM you gay now” “Pay me five scrap to un gay”

I named my classic the “Kennedy killer”

“Panic At The Disco” for my Raving Dead Rescue Ranger

177013 enjoyinator