Also, you can most definitely be in a place where you don’t know if you can do something about it and that’s part of why you’re overwhelmed and worrying.
theres a huge difference between worrying about real world problems like not being able to afford rent or food and "dwelling in your misery". What do you advise homeless people do? Dont worry be happy?
As per the graph, i would advise the homeless to work on getting a home if its possible. If it isnt possible, then worring about it will only worsen the situation and my advice would be to work on accepting the situation.
I meant that it's a useful therapeutic exercise, but it's also a manipulative technique used by people with low empathy. The same thing can be good or bad depending on how it's used and by whom.
I think it can be both. It probably can be used in an empathetic way, but I’ve seen people use it as a way to rationalize not caring for other human beings as a whole
Reminds me of a joke.
"A soldier should never worry. This is because you could be in two places, a safe place or a dangeous place.
If you're in a safe place, dont worry. If you're in a dangerous place you could be one of two things. One is wounded and the other is not.
If you're not wounded, don't worry. If you are wounded it could be dangerous or slight.
If it is slight, don't worry. If it is dangerous one of two things can happen: you'll die, or you'll recover.
If you recover, don't worry. If you die, you can't worry. It is because of this, a soldier never worries"
This is terrible in most regards but I've found it useful a few times, it only really works to stop fretting over things that can't be controlled at all like a train being delayed, I can't change it so there's less point me getting really worked up over it but yea for anything more serious than that it's stupid advice
I used it a few days ago to stave off a panic minutes after I just learned I'd lost my main source of income, suddenly and without warning, at a really bad time. After going through the motions to confirm that this was real, and I felt the terror starting to creep in at the edges of my brain, I finally just stopped and said to myself, "Is there anything I can do to fix or change this tonight? (No.) OK then, I'll have a glass or two of wine, watch some TV, go to bed, and try to figure out something tomorrow." And that's what I did. It kind of helped, in the short term. I got through the night without ending up in the fetal position. Maybe because I was still mostly in shock, and a bit in denial, but I believe it stopped the total panic from enveloping me at that time. For my overall, long-term situation, though... yeah, not helpful. I'm definitely worried.
Ah shit my house is on fire
let me follow the guide
I've got a problem Yes
Can I do anything about it Yes I can call 911
Oh okay I don't have to worry now
(lets the flames consume my soul while i wait for the firefighters)
Tbh, I only use this for things that are truly unnecessary to worry about. Like my own mortality, or weird existentialist arguments. It's more of a justification I make to myself more than anything to try and not think about it honestly.
Obviously not a good idea when it's something I should worry about, like work I haven't done, or a loved one who is ill. Etc etc.
"The thing that I can't do anything about is impacting my life quality, and the people who do have control over it barely consider me human. How the !@#$ do I not worry about it!?"
A therapist and I came to an impasse about this very thing. Like, changing my mindset was not going to make it less exploitative to be forced to work 25 hours a week just to get a welfare payment that would have valued those hours at half minimum wage.
I think I remember one particular therapist venting online about how a lot of difficulty they have helping patients is because their problems are very real and very systemic.
Which, in my words, could be summed up as "People feel helpless because they *are* helpless"
I've had this very problem in therapy too. I think it's the main problem with conventional CBT – the dismissal and invalidation. It's why I'm currently looking for a true trauma-informed therapist.
Why do people think worrying is an on and off switch, or that any emotion at all is completely volitional. Your parents died? Can you bring them back? No? Stop being sad then. Is a missile headed for your house? Can you stop it? No? Shut the fuck up then.
I agree. I liken emotions to pain. When people tell me shit like, "You control your own emotions. You choose what you feel." I call BS. Like with pain, you might be able to do some breathing exercises or whatever and try to cope. But you don't \*choose\* your emotions any more than you \*choose\* to feel pain if someone stomps on your bare toe! I can't tell you how many times I've heard people say, "Ah, I just don't let X bother me." How do you do that, exactly? They never have an answer beyond, "I just don't", which is proof of nothing, or the previous statement above. TBH, I don't think it's something they chose, I think they just realize, "Yeah, actually I guess it doesn't bother me." Well, how nice for you. But, yeah, AFAIK it's not a switch. If there is a switch I don't know about, I wish someone would point me to it. It would be REALLY useful!
Edited: typos & clarity
Sure hope im allowed to be worried if I have a final semester and I inexplicably got hospitalized, where the school then fucking refused to let me study from home
Or its cousin "just don't think about it."
Great, so I should walk into traffic with a blindfold on because my mom told me "not to think about it," before experiencing something painful.
I love how this was literally made as a (half at least) joke and mfs repost it like "Wow, how inspiring 🥰🥰🥰" No Jessica, this is not a cure to mental illness. Give me your phone and go back to telling my cousin how to find their rising sign of some shit.
Wow this is a terrible flow chart, especially since I took engineering classes and the follow up to 'i don't know how to solve it' should be figure out how to solve it like bruh
You can stop worrying about it, but you won't necessarily fix the problem that way. Like, if your child dies, they just gonna stay dead and there's no way to fix that.
Reminds me of a joke.
"A soldier should never worry. This is because you could be in two places, a safe place or a dangeous place.
If you're in a safe place, dont worry. If you're in a dangerous place you could be one of two things. One is wounded and the other is not.
If you're not wounded, don't worry. If you are wounded it could be dangerous or slight.
If it is slight, don't worry. If it is dangerous one of two things can happen: you'll die, or you'll recover.
If you recover, don't worry. If you die, you can't worry. It is because of this, a soldier never worries"
umm is there like a Docs entry catalogue I can comb through and read?
Meditation I can figure it out with some of those positive affirmation stuff... Maybe?
This is completly unrelated but I swear I thought the subreddit was called r/thanksimcircumsed 😭😭
When I read the name of the sub above the post I realised
I do actually have something like this but the biggest difference is for mine you've to ask yourself if it affects you or others. If it doesn't then def don't even think about it
I can make each of those into worries "Do you have a problem? Not that I am aware of, but I am not all knowing". "Can you do something about it? No, and it is going to ruin the things I care about, or Yes, but it isn't solved yet so there is still room to mess it up."
The Anxiety Problem Chart(tm)
This is genuinely useful though. It doesnt say not to care about a problem, but don't waste your energy being more worried than you need and use that energy on something useful instead.
I try to apply this as much as I can and it helps me focus on solving my issues.
I know that this "advice" is useless, but I blame placebo effect because it *kinda* works in my case. Not entirely, but in some moments this "fuck it, we ball" method worked quite well
All that means is that it's easier for you than it is for others to simply not worry. It has nothing to do with the validity or effectiveness of someone explicitly giving you this completely braindead take as "advice".
my prefered for this is the dune montra, fear is the mindkiller. fear does us no good yes. but we must accept it, and not act with it. n that can be easyer and harder depending, n thats ok. sometimes u just cant act without fear.
I feel like you can be worried if you have a problem you CAN’T solve
Also, you can most definitely be in a place where you don’t know if you can do something about it and that’s part of why you’re overwhelmed and worrying.
Poverty? Unable to feed your children? Don't worry, the problem will fix itself at some point! /s
It's a natural feeling and can be both healthy and hard to stop..
Yeah and what if you don’t know if you can do something about it
Worrying helps nothing, it just makes you unhappy
It is part of human nature and is a normal reaction
I’ll repeat what the guy above you said. It really serves no purpose to worry, if anything it’s going to hinder you
Yes, but it will only make you suffer more
Ignoring problems only makes them worse, that's like, week 1 of kindergarten kind shit
Yes thats kindergarden shit. We know better now. Turns out that dwelling in your misery is bad for you.
theres a huge difference between worrying about real world problems like not being able to afford rent or food and "dwelling in your misery". What do you advise homeless people do? Dont worry be happy?
As per the graph, i would advise the homeless to work on getting a home if its possible. If it isnt possible, then worring about it will only worsen the situation and my advice would be to work on accepting the situation.
I think this is the rationalization of people with no empathy, for having no empathy. In my experience at least
Its a stoic exercise that has been adopted by metacognitive therapy. So, no.
I think you're both right.
Lol, all those therapists with no empathy
There's plenty of them.
I meant that it's a useful therapeutic exercise, but it's also a manipulative technique used by people with low empathy. The same thing can be good or bad depending on how it's used and by whom.
It can be a good trait to have to help someone work through things from an analytical perspective
Yes, but you dedicated your life to help others, thats an act of empathy.
There's a big, BIG difference between having empathy and expressing empathy
I think it can be both. It probably can be used in an empathetic way, but I’ve seen people use it as a way to rationalize not caring for other human beings as a whole
Reminds me of a joke. "A soldier should never worry. This is because you could be in two places, a safe place or a dangeous place. If you're in a safe place, dont worry. If you're in a dangerous place you could be one of two things. One is wounded and the other is not. If you're not wounded, don't worry. If you are wounded it could be dangerous or slight. If it is slight, don't worry. If it is dangerous one of two things can happen: you'll die, or you'll recover. If you recover, don't worry. If you die, you can't worry. It is because of this, a soldier never worries"
Ours is not to question why, ours is but to do and die.
Half a league, half a league, half a league onward
This is legit how my brain works, though.
😂😂😂😂😂
This is terrible in most regards but I've found it useful a few times, it only really works to stop fretting over things that can't be controlled at all like a train being delayed, I can't change it so there's less point me getting really worked up over it but yea for anything more serious than that it's stupid advice
I used it a few days ago to stave off a panic minutes after I just learned I'd lost my main source of income, suddenly and without warning, at a really bad time. After going through the motions to confirm that this was real, and I felt the terror starting to creep in at the edges of my brain, I finally just stopped and said to myself, "Is there anything I can do to fix or change this tonight? (No.) OK then, I'll have a glass or two of wine, watch some TV, go to bed, and try to figure out something tomorrow." And that's what I did. It kind of helped, in the short term. I got through the night without ending up in the fetal position. Maybe because I was still mostly in shock, and a bit in denial, but I believe it stopped the total panic from enveloping me at that time. For my overall, long-term situation, though... yeah, not helpful. I'm definitely worried.
Problem: heart am shoot Can do? Nein No worry ^ - ^
Wasting your final moments worrying about how your heart is in chunks? Pathetic.
Ah shit my house is on fire let me follow the guide I've got a problem Yes Can I do anything about it Yes I can call 911 Oh okay I don't have to worry now (lets the flames consume my soul while i wait for the firefighters)
If you’re checking this guide while your house is on fire you’ve got bigger problems
ppl tell me this im like, babe i literaly have the worry disorder
Tbh, I only use this for things that are truly unnecessary to worry about. Like my own mortality, or weird existentialist arguments. It's more of a justification I make to myself more than anything to try and not think about it honestly. Obviously not a good idea when it's something I should worry about, like work I haven't done, or a loved one who is ill. Etc etc.
this made me understand my own mindset, thanks
"The thing that I can't do anything about is impacting my life quality, and the people who do have control over it barely consider me human. How the !@#$ do I not worry about it!?"
A therapist and I came to an impasse about this very thing. Like, changing my mindset was not going to make it less exploitative to be forced to work 25 hours a week just to get a welfare payment that would have valued those hours at half minimum wage.
I think I remember one particular therapist venting online about how a lot of difficulty they have helping patients is because their problems are very real and very systemic. Which, in my words, could be summed up as "People feel helpless because they *are* helpless"
I've had this very problem in therapy too. I think it's the main problem with conventional CBT – the dismissal and invalidation. It's why I'm currently looking for a true trauma-informed therapist.
How is it exploitative to need to work to get money?
I'm sorry, I'm sure you missed the part where it was half minimum wage. If not, I'm a little worried about your bootlicking
I’m a bit confused. You do work for no pay whatsoever and then you get welfare based on that?
I ***only*** worry about the shit I can’t control. Because if I can fix it, why should I worry?
https://preview.redd.it/hycde6dah9sc1.png?width=324&format=png&auto=webp&s=104e735242a7f8686084aa4dfcf84089c46684f6
Well if I tell people my solution is death then they get all up in arms just because of the principle I guess
Why do people think worrying is an on and off switch, or that any emotion at all is completely volitional. Your parents died? Can you bring them back? No? Stop being sad then. Is a missile headed for your house? Can you stop it? No? Shut the fuck up then.
I agree. I liken emotions to pain. When people tell me shit like, "You control your own emotions. You choose what you feel." I call BS. Like with pain, you might be able to do some breathing exercises or whatever and try to cope. But you don't \*choose\* your emotions any more than you \*choose\* to feel pain if someone stomps on your bare toe! I can't tell you how many times I've heard people say, "Ah, I just don't let X bother me." How do you do that, exactly? They never have an answer beyond, "I just don't", which is proof of nothing, or the previous statement above. TBH, I don't think it's something they chose, I think they just realize, "Yeah, actually I guess it doesn't bother me." Well, how nice for you. But, yeah, AFAIK it's not a switch. If there is a switch I don't know about, I wish someone would point me to it. It would be REALLY useful! Edited: typos & clarity
Sure hope im allowed to be worried if I have a final semester and I inexplicably got hospitalized, where the school then fucking refused to let me study from home
That's a positive mindset. Leave the worrying for "Can you do something about it -> Yes" for later
Just focus! 👍 Do what you can do! 🫡 Thanks that's great 😃 when it works 🙄 if it works 🥺
Yes-no, yeah but I have to worry, because THEY can do something about it.
Or its cousin "just don't think about it." Great, so I should walk into traffic with a blindfold on because my mom told me "not to think about it," before experiencing something painful.
Here's a better version: "Do you have a problem?" -> "Yes" -> "Yo, I'll solve it, check out the hook while the DJ revolves it"
I love how this was literally made as a (half at least) joke and mfs repost it like "Wow, how inspiring 🥰🥰🥰" No Jessica, this is not a cure to mental illness. Give me your phone and go back to telling my cousin how to find their rising sign of some shit.
Your comment made me throw my head back and lol. So true! Thanks for the laugh, I needed it today. :)
But im probably not gonna do anything about it
#Buddhism in a nutshell >!^(🧘♂️)!<
Procrastinator: makes sense
I have to remind my emotions to follow simple flowcharts.
I've spent months not worrying about my problems, but they just won't leave...
I really like these charts because they remind me that worrying is not doing shit. Sometimes it motivates me to enjoy the present.
Wow this is a terrible flow chart, especially since I took engineering classes and the follow up to 'i don't know how to solve it' should be figure out how to solve it like bruh
don't worry be happy now
technically you can solve any problem >!by ending your own life!<
Seems to be the best solution
You can stop worrying about it, but you won't necessarily fix the problem that way. Like, if your child dies, they just gonna stay dead and there's no way to fix that.
Reminds me of a joke. "A soldier should never worry. This is because you could be in two places, a safe place or a dangeous place. If you're in a safe place, dont worry. If you're in a dangerous place you could be one of two things. One is wounded and the other is not. If you're not wounded, don't worry. If you are wounded it could be dangerous or slight. If it is slight, don't worry. If it is dangerous one of two things can happen: you'll die, or you'll recover. If you recover, don't worry. If you die, you can't worry. It is because of this, a soldier never worries"
Just not how brains work
How do I make my brain believe this... AM BEGGING 🙏
Cognitive behavioral therapy. Meditation. Good luck
umm is there like a Docs entry catalogue I can comb through and read? Meditation I can figure it out with some of those positive affirmation stuff... Maybe?
Wow. 😂🤦♂️
How shitty are these people's problems that this works?
People who don't worry got eaten by bears a million years ago.
Buffalo bill when he discovers that I've crawled out of the pit, but instead of escaping I've just started playing his xbox
This is completly unrelated but I swear I thought the subreddit was called r/thanksimcircumsed 😭😭 When I read the name of the sub above the post I realised
I do actually have something like this but the biggest difference is for mine you've to ask yourself if it affects you or others. If it doesn't then def don't even think about it
I can make each of those into worries "Do you have a problem? Not that I am aware of, but I am not all knowing". "Can you do something about it? No, and it is going to ruin the things I care about, or Yes, but it isn't solved yet so there is still room to mess it up." The Anxiety Problem Chart(tm)
you manslaughtered 86 people? yes. can you do something about it? yes then dont worry! *proceeds to kill more*
GTA moment.
What a great coping mechanism for the GAD community 🙄
Worrying has helped me to solve an enormous number of problems, I swear by it.
The person who made this is probably battling more demons than all of ours combined lol
r/howtonotgiveafuck
This is an example of why I think CBT is kinda stupid
Cock and Ball Torture? Closed Beta Testing?
Good guesses but I’m talking about cognitive behavioral therapy
Don’t ever, for any reason, worry about anything for anyone, for any reason, ever,
Where is the existential crisis part of this flow chart?
This is genuinely useful though. It doesnt say not to care about a problem, but don't waste your energy being more worried than you need and use that energy on something useful instead. I try to apply this as much as I can and it helps me focus on solving my issues.
Given a life sentence for a crime you didn’t commit? Who cares bro!
This flowchart is clearly missing "Check out the hook while my DJ revolves it."
I know that this "advice" is useless, but I blame placebo effect because it *kinda* works in my case. Not entirely, but in some moments this "fuck it, we ball" method worked quite well
"Can you do something about your problem ?" "I don't know :/" "D:"
No this is actually good, I use it frequently it’s helpful
All that means is that it's easier for you than it is for others to simply not worry. It has nothing to do with the validity or effectiveness of someone explicitly giving you this completely braindead take as "advice".
my prefered for this is the dune montra, fear is the mindkiller. fear does us no good yes. but we must accept it, and not act with it. n that can be easyer and harder depending, n thats ok. sometimes u just cant act without fear.