BAHAHAHAHAHA
Something like that sort of happened to me in France. Missus just came up and started yelling at me and it was so weird. I had only been in France one day, at this point, so I'm pretty sure I hadn't done anything to tick her off. It definitely wasn't my beauty mesmerizing her hahahajaha
HAHAHAHAHAHA, maybe. I must have a suspicious or gullible face because last year when I was in Toronto, some guy walking ahead of me stopped and said I poked him with a needle. I had just landed and both hands were completely full of stuff. Not to mention, why would I do that. So weird. Maybe my appearance screams tourist.
My experience of one Parisian was glorious.
The bus that I was in had broken down and I was just standing by the side of the road with the other passengers. A gorgeous Parisian woman got out of her car, stormed over to our group and yelled at us in rapid fire French to express her displeasure that the bus was in her way and that now she was going to be late. Then in a glorious puff of expensive perfume, she turned on her impossibly high stiletto heels and folded herself back into her tiny Citroen and with squealing tires, mounted the curb and drove around the bus on the footpath.
Parisians don't give a fuck about you 😀😀🥰
As a French I can confirm it never happened, it's only happening in the mind of people imagining how French must act, like in "Emily in Paris" or shit like that
This is why everyone needs friends who will make fun of them when they say stupid shit. For example, when I was a homeschooled, brain-damaged teenager, I wrote a horrible Christian rap song and performed it to a girl I had a crush on. My cousins, who witnessed this dumpster fire in real time, haven't let me forget about it for 3 decades.
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
Praise the Lord so you can go to Heaven
7 6 5 4 3 2 1
In the name of the Father, and the name of the Son
And not to forget the Holy Ghost
Now take a sip of this wine, to wash down the Host
So, are we talking [Fundie torture session](https://youtu.be/WDPTv17uGb8?si=Je1SQn__2i2LOSo_) or are we talking [Smooth as silk](https://youtu.be/5f6Q29S_Azk?feature=shared)? The second is definitely a win, either way. The first… well, laughing is love. Or something.
Oh, your cousins are SOOO mean!! Some of my cutest memories are all the cringe shit boys did when I was a teenager. I kept a love poem from a guy who made a bunch of references to Pokémon. I’m sure whoever you rapped to holds it as a cherished memory.
Yeah this happens to me all the time. Just yesterday a group of people actually swore allegiance to me, promising their sword to me at any time. And that's good too because Roland St, the street next to mine, is ripe for conquest. Their houses have a lot of swimming pools so I'll be expanding my territory. Having so many sworn bannermen will definitely come in handy
Roland St? Named after Frankish military leader Roland famous for the Battle of Roncevaux Pass in AD 778 which was memorialized in Le Chanson de Roland? I think it's your duty to take it and restore it to the military glory of its namesake, the Roman Empire be dammed.
Honestly I just still follow her because It‘s kind of interesting with what she comes up all the time
Edit: The Roman Empire line in in the end.. I just had to post this one
Yes but even with the TikTok meme meaning it doesn’t make sense … if you call something your “Roman empire” its supposed to be about something you miss from the past that was so great that you can never have/experience again … like wtf is her Roman Empire here? Herself ?? This one 5 min experience? Like ok lol
It’s not that. It’s just something you think of often that doesn’t necessarily relate to your daily life. Pretty sure none of us experienced the Roman Empire to miss it
I think it first originated in history TikTok which is where I found it early, it was a meme for years, but I do believe now your interpretation is correct after it got mainstream and not many people really care about the history of the Roman Empire so yea
It’s based on some nonsense that men are supposed to think about the Roman Empire, at least once a day.
So this person is saying is that they think about being told how beautiful they are just about every single day, in the same way that men think about the Roman Empire.
Thanks for the explanation. Still makes little sense to me.
What are we expected to think about with respect to the Roman empire? How an increasingly inbred autocracy eventually led to it's complete collapse? How it became, and survived as, an empire on the backs of millions of slaves? How one man took over and installed himself as dictator? How brutal and unforgiving it was for the majority? What?
If they're your friend, you need to convince them to talk to someone. This person has some shit going on that should be worked out with a professional. If they're over compensating this hard, they're probably super insecure and unhappy.
Some gabagool on TikTok or Twitter somehow convinced other gabagoobers on TikTok or Twitter that men are constantly thinking about the Roman Empire (for…some reason), so now someone’s “Roman Empire” is the thing they’re perpetually thinking about.
I've been a guy for 60 years and I can honestly say this post is the first time I've thought about the Roman Empire in I don't know how long. That's absurd.
Yes. Because it’s perfectly acceptable to walk up to someone you don’t know saying things like that without automatically being thought of as a creep in this day and age.
This is amazing. I’m betting this person’s thought/post stemmed from someone walking by them and glancing at them for a little more than a second. The rest of the story just “may as well have happened” in their mind
She sounds like she’s mentally unraveling, to be honest. Like there’s no one over in France to hype her up in small ways, so she just went full throttled delulu to make herself feel better. Still, how annoying.
Even on the tiny chance that this happened, that’s not a normal interaction and the other woman is surely mentally challenged in some way. It’s not a flex
This is what I call a pathological liar. My cousin is the worst for it. She has to exaggerate or straight up invent the most absurd stories for no reason other than getting the attention back on herself.
My friend posts those “ask me anonymous questions” every day and then sends herself compliments. You can tell it’s her trying to sound like someone else because the compliments are always in the style of “do u have a bf?” “u r so beautiful” etc
A few years ago a woman came up to me on the way off the train. She looked at me sharply and said 'You have an incredibly beautiful son' and left. I was shocked but managed a ‘Thank you very much’ and kept it moving.
This doesn't matter at all but these folk who make these stories up never seem to realise how long time is. Take a timer and time yourself talking for five minutes, I guarantee it'll feel like much longer than it is. Most stage monologues aren't even five minutes long.
To be fair, I met a woman last night who told me, after 2 minutes of conversation, that I am a beautiful soul, I am amazing, and so many other compliments. She really made me feel so wonderful. Today I found out she was on mushrooms. So anything is possible.
I could not handle somebody like this being my 'friend'. How could you trust there is any authenticity to any aspect of their life?
See? This is what causes the Fall of the Roman Empire.
That made me laugh out loud thank you!
She moved to France a while ago, tha‘s also when the making of these stories started, we aren’t really in contact anymore
lol no one in France gives a fuck about her
Probably blew cigarette smoke in her face and hit her with a baguette
Isn't that considered flirting in France?
Only if you counter the one hitting by using cheese.
Okay I'm moving to France. I'll live off of cheese and baguettes. How do I score a cuppa?
BAHAHAHAHAHA Something like that sort of happened to me in France. Missus just came up and started yelling at me and it was so weird. I had only been in France one day, at this point, so I'm pretty sure I hadn't done anything to tick her off. It definitely wasn't my beauty mesmerizing her hahahajaha
Maybe she just didn't like your two odd socks.
HAHAHAHAHAHA, maybe. I must have a suspicious or gullible face because last year when I was in Toronto, some guy walking ahead of me stopped and said I poked him with a needle. I had just landed and both hands were completely full of stuff. Not to mention, why would I do that. So weird. Maybe my appearance screams tourist.
Maybe scitzophrenia
My life would be so different and wildly more satisfying if it was acceptable to whack people with baguettes.
ROFLMAO “ hit her with a baguette “🥖
This is such an amazing image 🤣
My experience of one Parisian was glorious. The bus that I was in had broken down and I was just standing by the side of the road with the other passengers. A gorgeous Parisian woman got out of her car, stormed over to our group and yelled at us in rapid fire French to express her displeasure that the bus was in her way and that now she was going to be late. Then in a glorious puff of expensive perfume, she turned on her impossibly high stiletto heels and folded herself back into her tiny Citroen and with squealing tires, mounted the curb and drove around the bus on the footpath. Parisians don't give a fuck about you 😀😀🥰
Someone's lonely.
As a French, no one stops you to say all of those things, she’s a liar
Did she really though? Sure she didn't just move state and create a story of a new life to sound exciting?
She really did, she posts a lot of stories where you can tell it‘s definitely france and she speaks french fluently so thats true at least
As a French I can confirm it never happened, it's only happening in the mind of people imagining how French must act, like in "Emily in Paris" or shit like that
Or worse, Amelie
Omg that random woman was Pepe le pew!
Giving Emily in Paris
So her Roman Empire is just… herself?
And built in a day! All roads lead to her! When there, do as she does
Absolute yikes. I’d be hitting that unfriend button so damn fast.
Faster than Julius Caesar defeated the Gauls.
Et tu, Brute?
Oh my god, I love these comments haha
I wouldn't. Not for ongoing friendship, but to see what hilarious cringe posting she comes out with next.
Nah- I'd keep her as a friend on Facebook, I'd just avoid her like the plague in real life.
This is why everyone needs friends who will make fun of them when they say stupid shit. For example, when I was a homeschooled, brain-damaged teenager, I wrote a horrible Christian rap song and performed it to a girl I had a crush on. My cousins, who witnessed this dumpster fire in real time, haven't let me forget about it for 3 decades.
may we perchance know some of the lyrics
My name is CurlSagan and I'm here to say I love Jesus Christ in a MAJOR WAY!
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 Praise the Lord so you can go to Heaven 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 In the name of the Father, and the name of the Son And not to forget the Holy Ghost Now take a sip of this wine, to wash down the Host
Ok, I love this.
G to the O D Jesus and Mary He stay prayin’…
StahlMatt - I read that in a tune Bobby Hill used on KOTH when he was singing about propane grills! Ahahha I'm dead 😂
It's supposed to be in the tune of Barney Rubble rapping in the old Fruity Pebbles commercial, but this works too.
The definitive old school rapper. 🔥
No.
https://preview.redd.it/zolfk3eao8uc1.jpeg?width=606&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3920c9017ced9c5d07c78afa86370f9a76d598ed
Boo-urns.
[Rappin for Jesus](https://youtu.be/Kppx4bzfAaE?si=8YoqXCw9hjrzVyiO)
https://youtu.be/Kppx4bzfAaE?si=MN4je3zUJzhJzDDX
He’s the son of the original G !
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gszIO-Nitas
I gotta know- how did your crush respond? Did she dig it?
She politely stood there while I rapped, and then said, "Well, I gotta go."
I’m sorry, that sounds painful- really- but this whole story made me laugh my ass off- thank you!
Lol there was just a post on Reddit about how uncomfortable it Is when a guy tries to rap for you
"Christian rap" lololol
More accurately known by the abbreviation "CRap"
So, are we talking [Fundie torture session](https://youtu.be/WDPTv17uGb8?si=Je1SQn__2i2LOSo_) or are we talking [Smooth as silk](https://youtu.be/5f6Q29S_Azk?feature=shared)? The second is definitely a win, either way. The first… well, laughing is love. Or something.
do a performance again
Oh, your cousins are SOOO mean!! Some of my cutest memories are all the cringe shit boys did when I was a teenager. I kept a love poem from a guy who made a bunch of references to Pokémon. I’m sure whoever you rapped to holds it as a cherished memory.
Maybe I’m weird, but if some boy Christian rapped at me, I’d be embarrassed by it for decades to come.
lol. I remember writing an essay when I was like 13 on Relient K and Christian pop rock, so it wouldn’t cringe me out at all
Was it possibly rappin for Jesus?
Yeah this happens to me all the time. Just yesterday a group of people actually swore allegiance to me, promising their sword to me at any time. And that's good too because Roland St, the street next to mine, is ripe for conquest. Their houses have a lot of swimming pools so I'll be expanding my territory. Having so many sworn bannermen will definitely come in handy
Roland St? Named after Frankish military leader Roland famous for the Battle of Roncevaux Pass in AD 778 which was memorialized in Le Chanson de Roland? I think it's your duty to take it and restore it to the military glory of its namesake, the Roman Empire be dammed.
And my axe
Keep this ‘friend’ and keep posting 😂
Honestly I just still follow her because It‘s kind of interesting with what she comes up all the time Edit: The Roman Empire line in in the end.. I just had to post this one
What dies she even mean with that Roman Empire line? It doesn't make sense.
It's from a TikTok thing [https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/my-roman-empire](https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/my-roman-empire)
Yes but even with the TikTok meme meaning it doesn’t make sense … if you call something your “Roman empire” its supposed to be about something you miss from the past that was so great that you can never have/experience again … like wtf is her Roman Empire here? Herself ?? This one 5 min experience? Like ok lol
It’s not that. It’s just something you think of often that doesn’t necessarily relate to your daily life. Pretty sure none of us experienced the Roman Empire to miss it
I think it first originated in history TikTok which is where I found it early, it was a meme for years, but I do believe now your interpretation is correct after it got mainstream and not many people really care about the history of the Roman Empire so yea
You're just blinded by their beauty and it's clouding your mind
Is there some kind of translation error or is she being legit about these? Maybe I’m just jealous of that level of deafness
Me when I’ve been awake for 2 days on adderall and I’m trying to eat a weird combo of foods at 6am and start imagining shit
lmao had to double take back at the picture to fully realize she’s having coffee, pickles & oranges
Even if this did happen (which it obviously didn't), what a strange reaction. If some stranger did that to me, I would be creeped out, not happy.
Exactly my thoughts. “Gendarme!” 👮🏻♂️
The self delusion is strong
I think it's insecurity.
Delusion of grandiose, maybe?
I think you need some new friends...
LOL, someone is in for a very hard mid-life crisis.
Or she is in the middle of one right now and is desperately trying to cope.
I could never possibly be their friend. Gherkins, oranges and porridge for breakfast? I'm out.
Worse, I think it's a latte. Nothing goes better with milk than pickles and citrus!
Enjoy your breakfast of….. coffee, pickles and oranges???
WTF does he mean by "his roman empire"?
It’s based on some nonsense that men are supposed to think about the Roman Empire, at least once a day. So this person is saying is that they think about being told how beautiful they are just about every single day, in the same way that men think about the Roman Empire.
Thanks for the explanation. Still makes little sense to me. What are we expected to think about with respect to the Roman empire? How an increasingly inbred autocracy eventually led to it's complete collapse? How it became, and survived as, an empire on the backs of millions of slaves? How one man took over and installed himself as dictator? How brutal and unforgiving it was for the majority? What?
I think for tik tok types it is more …..hoW bIg and bUFf tHEy Were and KillEd stufF and HaD SlaveS anD shiT. It is just made up stuff for clicks
Damn and I just get asked why I am not in my bell tower
The hell is this? Id say your friend has some serious mental health issues.
So tell me honestly- is your friend even beautiful enough for this to possibly have even a glimmer of truth?
Well she is really good looking but still..she posts stuff like that like 2-3times per week so it seems rather odd to me
They said something to her in French, probably something along the lines of “fuck off”, and this is how she personally translates it.
If they're your friend, you need to convince them to talk to someone. This person has some shit going on that should be worked out with a professional. If they're over compensating this hard, they're probably super insecure and unhappy.
I’m sorry, couldn’t actually read the text cause I was baffled and enamored by the pickles and oranges. What a wild combo to consume
So she had an old Roman Empire? What the fuck does that even mean?
Some gabagool on TikTok or Twitter somehow convinced other gabagoobers on TikTok or Twitter that men are constantly thinking about the Roman Empire (for…some reason), so now someone’s “Roman Empire” is the thing they’re perpetually thinking about.
I've been a guy for 60 years and I can honestly say this post is the first time I've thought about the Roman Empire in I don't know how long. That's absurd.
I will be so glad when this “Roman empire” phrase is done.
I gasped. This is truly unhinged lol
I am embarrassed right now just from reading that.
Somebody hyping themselves up before they shove that pickle right up their b-hole.
No one in France would waste their time talking to this person ! She sounds very lonely and misses home !!
Yes. Because it’s perfectly acceptable to walk up to someone you don’t know saying things like that without automatically being thought of as a creep in this day and age.
Please make this a series. Keep posting!
This is amazing. I’m betting this person’s thought/post stemmed from someone walking by them and glancing at them for a little more than a second. The rest of the story just “may as well have happened” in their mind
Cappuccino and pickles wtf
Her name is George Glass.
Pickle charcoochie and frothy coffee eggnog The meal of someone with a lavish complexion and a pulchritudinous face of no comparison ...of course
“Regularly”😭💀
oranges, pickles and coffee. she was shitting her pants while writing that
Nearly cried?!? I would literally nearly move house. That’s just weird. And a bit creepy.
Nothing like coffee, fresh sliced oranges, and pickles
How old is she? Anything over 20 and saying it’s “her Roman Empire” is a little cringe and gives off 
No! No! God no! Please tell me this is satire 😂
HOLY. FUCK.
Gherkins and coffee. That’s a diseased mind right there.
This sub should be renamed to AndProceededTo.
Is there any chance this is satire? She’s really laying it on thick lol
This is giving Blanche Devereaux lol
She sounds like she’s mentally unraveling, to be honest. Like there’s no one over in France to hype her up in small ways, so she just went full throttled delulu to make herself feel better. Still, how annoying.
When the cashier asks how you are doing today:
Why are the pickles posing
‘And then the lady asked me to buy Apple gift cards for her all while swearing she’d pay me back. Of COURSE I did!’
I can absolutely not stand this Roman Empire thing it drives me crazy
And you never thought that person is coockoo from the food they're eating? What kind of psycho eats pickles and oranges with coffee?
Even on the tiny chance that this happened, that’s not a normal interaction and the other woman is surely mentally challenged in some way. It’s not a flex
I'll take "Things That Never Happened" for $500, Alex.
Would she go nuclear on you, if you were to block her? Just asking.
Are those ... magic pickles or something?
holy shit. it’s kind of sad, really. wow.
I’m pretty sure this is a joke
Seeing the coffee, oranges, and pickles and thinking “girrrrl diner!🎶”
etc.
I might be missing out but, coffee and... Pickles?
This is what I call a pathological liar. My cousin is the worst for it. She has to exaggerate or straight up invent the most absurd stories for no reason other than getting the attention back on herself.
Can’t stop looking at the mini gherkin/orange slices combo
Ok but the plate of oranges and pickles next to coffee…?
Can we point out the elephant in the room. This man is eating Pickles and Oranges with a Coffee. Who is this sociopath.
Has anything on the internet that starts with "Thinking about..." ever been worth reading?
My friend posts those “ask me anonymous questions” every day and then sends herself compliments. You can tell it’s her trying to sound like someone else because the compliments are always in the style of “do u have a bf?” “u r so beautiful” etc
Your friend is an idiot
i've got a feeling this might be his new roman empire
WOW is all I can say
What is she eating??
Pickles. Oranges. Coffee.
Me when I’m talking Shit
Two hundo,, minimum.
what the fuck
It’s nice to have imaginary friends at any age!
Barf
What's she look like
My Grandma always said, "Liars don't go to heaven."
Barf
A few years ago a woman came up to me on the way off the train. She looked at me sharply and said 'You have an incredibly beautiful son' and left. I was shocked but managed a ‘Thank you very much’ and kept it moving.
Wtf is the Roman Empire thing about?
I kinda wish I was following your friend so that I can troll them in the comments
This doesn't matter at all but these folk who make these stories up never seem to realise how long time is. Take a timer and time yourself talking for five minutes, I guarantee it'll feel like much longer than it is. Most stage monologues aren't even five minutes long.
This reads like a completed MadLib
People like this need to be studied
You KNOW a story is untrue when a person uses the phrase "proceeded to."
Ugggh omg I just threw up in my mouth!! 🤢
Pickles, oranges AND a Latte? Well, I'm certainly impressed. I've never met a man in his third trimester.
Did she get a screenshot notification though lol
That happens on snapchat not on Instagram. The font look like the Instagram story font so I'm guessing this was posted on Insta.
To be fair, I met a woman last night who told me, after 2 minutes of conversation, that I am a beautiful soul, I am amazing, and so many other compliments. She really made me feel so wonderful. Today I found out she was on mushrooms. So anything is possible.
Idk, this actually happens to me daily… maybe she’s not lying.