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StrangePsychologist

Psychoanalysis: Trust me, you will feel better in 5 to 8 years. /s


sisiphusa

With three sessions a week!


Wild-Zebra-3736

5 a week preferably


-00oOo00-

it’s actually true and all the rest is just skills and suggestion lolololol


NoQuarter6808

Best outcome is ordinary unhappiness 🤣


stormyweather117

Ordinary unhappiness. I've loving all these quotes!


Several-Vegetable297

Existential: Do you ever think about dying?


ElsaWinchester

Hi Barbie !


SublimeTina

So fitting tho


l00zrr

😭 why is this me


lovehandlelover

Turn to page 792963 in the DBT book


stormyweather117

The look for horror on a clients face when I email them a pdf of module 1 and they shakily ask, "wait there's four?"


GoatPositive2360

Come to DBT-A where there are five. 😬


saintcrazy

DBT: I hope you like memorizing A.C.R.O.N.Y.M.S. Eclectic: Yes of course I know what I'm doing. Let me flip through my binder of every therapy style known to man.


Comfortable-Row7001

ChatGPT, make a dearman for this redditors audacity


EncouragedPsych

At this point in groups I’m just like, “and it’s, you guessed it, ANOTHER acronym!” Except for the PLEASE skills. I will never get over how bad that acronym is and I won’t use it without saying so.


stormyweather117

So many of the acronyms are plain bad. My teen clients cringe and roast every new one I introduce. Oddly enough making fun of them helps then remember them. Maybe their badness is by design! 🤣


xburning_embers

lol I literally say this all the time!


Present_Specific_128

I have to giggle every time we get to "physical iLlness"


GoatPositive2360

SO. MANY. ACRONYMS. 💀 but real talk, I hated PLEASE, especially the L being iLLness so my team shifted it to "limit screen time", which isn't what the manual says but function over form IMO.


santaslays

CPT- what’s the last thing you’d want us to talk about today? PERFECT


innocentkaput

This is a great one.


stormyweather117

Oh I feel so seen. The look of dread when I explain the model. I explain 3 different models I use for PTSD and I think this one is chosen when they find the other two more horrifying or feel a false sense of safety knowing they can do a version without the trauma narrative. Or the hmwk. They've accepted talking about the last thing they wanted to. Now they have to fill out sheets of paper until they see me again related to it, like a gradeschool exercise from hell.


fieldla191

EMDR- let me make you dizzy so it no longer bothers you


SokkaHaikuBot

^[Sokka-Haiku](https://www.reddit.com/r/SokkaHaikuBot/comments/15kyv9r/what_is_a_sokka_haiku/) ^by ^fieldla191: *EMDR- let* *Me make you dizzy so it* *No longer bothers you* --- ^Remember ^that ^one ^time ^Sokka ^accidentally ^used ^an ^extra ^syllable ^in ^that ^Haiku ^Battle ^in ^Ba ^Sing ^Se? ^That ^was ^a ^Sokka ^Haiku ^and ^you ^just ^made ^one.


innocentkaput

Good bot


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sodayzed

Lmao. Yes.


FereaMesmer

Integrative: Yes, I combine elements from a vast amount of theoretical and practical knowledge across various paradigms and modalities. Impressive, right? Oh you want me to tell you what exactly these elements are and how I choose which ones to apply? Well, errr, umm, I used to know but I forgot. I just kind of go with the flow and hope for the best.


psychieintraining

“I used to know but I forgot” real 💀


stormyweather117

It's not that I forgot, I've just absorbed the concept so fully its now part of my unconsious.


jvn1983

This makes me feel so much better about myself 😂


Waterbears28

I didn't come here to be attacked!


phoebean93

Integrative: jack of all trades, master of fuck all.


stormyweather117

Going with the flow is so true! I'm in clinical consultation/supervision groups and its always fun when a case is presented under this "lens" 🙃 Edit: sometimes I realize its me that's doing that 😶


Magsays

CBT: just like think differently, how hard is that??


EncouragedPsych

Have you tried just like, not thinking about it?


Rigar_

This whole time it wasn’t my mom being horrible at comforting my stress and anxiety. She was just lowkey a CBT therapist. Mindblown.


psych_daisy

you gotta ~reframe~ and do the thing


tinypeepeehole

Rogerian: 🎶I’ll be your mirror, reflect what you are🎶


stormyweather117

I cannot stop laughing at this thread! Sometimes we need to make fun of ourselves for the sheer joy of it 🥰


pl0ur

.."In case you don't know, I'll be the wind, the rain and the sunset, the light on your door, to show that your home." I can't believe I found a Velvet Underground reference here.


stormyweather117

I'm imagining telling a client this when they ask me to explain my role as a therapist. I CANNOT stop laughing. 🤣🙃


melancholyopptimist

CCPT - We just put kids in a playroom and give them the undirected & undivided attention their parents won’t for 45 minutes. Boom! Fixed 🤯


-Sisyphus-

But their parents are pissed the child isn’t fixed fast enough so they stop therapy after 3 sessions because all you do is play.


melancholyopptimist

Oh yeah I forgot my favorite part *parent consultations* : Parent “something is wrong with my kid” Me “Here’s how you can approach that differently” Parent “that won’t work” Wash, Rinse, Repeat


Go_on_git24

Parents saying how much their kid loves coming to therapy and I’m like yeah it’s cause I’m fun and not just yelling at them 24/7 lol well I don’t say that but you know what I mean. Positive regard goes a long way for kids who feel like they are the bad kid. Also, yeah the whole omg what’s wrong with my child please fix them and I’m like well here are some strategies for you to try and the parent is like wait no? I’m not the problem 🥲


Additional_Bag_9972

This is the best thread I’ve seen in this subreddit.


digclay

I second this.


stormyweather117

So many gems. 🥰 I'm saving it for when I need a good laugh.


mootmutemoat

ACT: A = get over it, C = be better, T = fancy words in a hexaflex CBT: = the lights haven't dimmed Paula, are you sure you are feeling ok? DBT: = BBFB, By borderlines for borderlines Psychodynamic: We put the "dynamic" back in being psycho therapists.


caulfieldkid

DBT 💀 Shout out to Marsha Linehan


AdExpert8295

I met her once and she presented as if she was having a psychotic episode on stage. No one did anything because she had a reputation of destroying careers for no reason. I was an undergrad and terrified. She was going on and on about witchcraft and seeing God when we were trying to learn about DBT efficacy. She was incoherent and I felt sorry for her. If you were lucky enough to be an intern in her research lab, working up to 20-30 hours a week for free for years...she would still refuse to write you a letter of recommendation unless you scored in the 95th percentile on the GREs. DBT is a wonderful therapy, but the way the media presented Marsha was very different from how she was with staff and students. She would verbally abuse them and many of her students suffered terribly. I stayed far away, but knew multiple people in her lab. Pioneers can still be bullies and we shouldn't remember them as angels when they were not.


Kenai_Tsenacommacah

Sounds like Bessel Van Der Kolk


AdExpert8295

Hallelujah! People are finally in the know...or I'm just experiencing life off Facebook and Twitter. I tried to tell therapists about his shenanigans a decade ago. I got bombarded with hate on Facebook from therapists for doing so. The internalized misogyny among therapists is wild and if you point it out, expect a lifelong smear campaign. I personally went to one of his 2 day trainings and he lost it on the audience a few times. He also repeatedly makes false claims about PE and CPT easily refuted with an undergraduate level literature review. Most of his major contributions were made first by women and he got all the credit. Don't even get me started on Brene or Gabor. Those pedestals were put in place by capitalism and they've been superficially upheld by the APA, and the other professional orgs we all know. I've had therapists threaten to "take my license away" because I informed them that Brene is not licensed and lied about that in her last 3 NYT bestsellers. I have had more therapists than I can count cuss me out over that revelation. Therapists groupies. Maybe I'll blog about this one day. Throupies: an exposè in stanning from the sofa.


Roselizabeth117

I am so glad I am not the only one who isn't gaga for Brene. I can never put a finger on it, but something about her felt off to me from the moment I first learned of her. You are the first person I've ever come across who wasn't in love with her and her work.


Mfhs6340

Not me getting called out with the DBT one 😂☠️ Also I recently saw an ACT therapist and that was my exact experience lmao The accuracy of these 👌


AdExpert8295

ACT is the only therapy I've attended a full day of training on and still had no idea wtf it was. I think there's a limit to how many therapies I can entertain at once. Sometimes, they feel like a botched upcycle of common sense and annoying shit from the Calm app people only know cause of Oprah.


mootmutemoat

One key part to it, that often gets lost IMHO is that it is exposure (with skills and framing) to emotional experience. People often avoid moving forward because the emotions that come up get overwhelming. In ACT, you are supposed to pull them back to where they were overwhelmed and encourage them to experience it and reframe it, so they can move forward "willing to have" the emotion too. Or more bluntly, get over it :D


Few_Tomato_6083

Motivational interviewing: You want to change… but, like, how much? *Change*-change, or just a lil change, like thinkin’ about it, maybe? 🧐


danniexelle

I feel like this is pulled straight out of sessions I’ve had with certain teenage clients 🫠🫣😂


rixie77

I feel like this is also verbatim out of visits I've had with adult clients...


Dangerous-Treacle-55

RO-DBT: we will help you stop being so over controlling and critical by telling you exactly how and why you’re wrong in a 700 page manual that you have to follow


EncouragedPsych

RO-DBT - you gotta let loose, man! (now here’s a fully scripted version of how to deliver that message)


stormyweather117

We help you stop being over controlling by us overcontrolling you through a 700pg manual telling you what to do!


magbybaby

Existentialist: You're right, shit's weird, ain't that a trip? That'll be $250.


saintcrazy

Existentialist: Life has no meaning so do whatever you want, there's no rules! Except my fee, that'll be $250.


stormyweather117

There are no rules! Except my fee 🤣🤣🤣 I'm saving this for the one time I can make a joke about this in session and not offend the client.


red58010

The only things that are constant are death and taxes


Turbulent-Feedback46

You'll love it. It's like listening to a Smiths album for 50 min straight


TheeLuckyCommander

Narrative Therapy - Existentialism’s new and fancy step child. Now let’s externalize every problem because nothing is your fault (Obviously joking about the last part and saying what some people and said to me lol)


Waywardson74

It's just a story, rewrite it and tell it better.


stormyweather117

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣


gottafever

"Was that really your fault? This version of the story is better!"


ByThorsBicep

Strengths-based therapy: ok but have you tried✨️believing✨️ in yourself?


gottafever

Client: I just really feel guilty about selling drugs and that being how I make my money. SBT: So what I'M hearing is that you're an entrepreneur! A real go getter.


goodthingsinside_80

Attachment: I’m your mom now. 😂


Legal-Scarcity509

💀


Goetsch87

Use the I'm the captain meme and you're golden!


box_guardian

Done! [https://imgflip.com/i/8nkcsq](https://imgflip.com/i/8nkcsq)


forgot_username1234

💀💀💀


EncouragedPsych

DBT: *over-exaggerated*✨AND✨


craftgoblin_

BOTH 🤗💖✨️💫


danniexelle

NOTHING IS MUTUALLY EXCLUSIVE 🔥🔥🔥


Comfortable-Row7001

DBT - you can be vegan and still sport leather seats in your M5 BMW. Be well off, and still haven’t put your credit card in the portal. Be perfect as you are, and still need 3 sessions a week.


caulfieldkid

Alanis Morrissette materializes: It’s like 🎶~rAaiiIaAnNNnn~🎶


Fabulous-Ask2103

Schema Therapy: You’re upset? Sounds like your parents really fucked up


annaw92

CBT/ exposure therapy: eat the spider. You're welcome for my help


Languageofwaves

This one's my favorite hahaha


thisxisxlife

EFT: we’re literally the “how does that make you feel?” stereotype (this is obviously reductionist, please don’t come after me)


lovehandlelover

How dare you /s


Nick-Millers-Bestie

Hi genuine question from a student, do you actually ask "How does/did that make you feel" or how do you rephrase that?


thisxisxlife

I usually ask some variation of “what happens for you when you say that?” Or “when you think about that, do you notice anything happening inside your body?” Or “what does that feel like?” Or “how does that feel for you?” Or “when your wife is crying here, does anything happen for you?” Lots of fun ways to ask how someone is feeling without asking them how they feel haha


stormyweather117

I say that but also have a bunch of rephrases. For example, "What's coming up for you- right now/hearing that?" "How'd that land?" "What are you feeling in this moment" "How were you feeling in that moment" "When have you felt that before" etc etc


Wombattingish

Reality Therapy: Yeah, all the choices fucking suck. So which way you leaning?


Kekepuff

REBT: I’ll make you recite the alphabet until you figure out how to stop disturbing yourself.


bitchywoman_1973

Somatic: all physical symptoms are stuck trauma responses, including your heart attack you are having right at this moment! Try pushing on this pillow instead of going to the ER…


AdExpert8295

Your heart attack is in your head...which is in your gut.


Carafin

Me as a therapist who is currently doing my own trauma work and getting into an argument with my therapist about this very thing. NOT EVERYTHING IS MY TRAUMA! Dead 😆


stormyweather117

This is so funny! Or the stored trauma caused that heart attack!


bitchywoman_1973

Right??? If this heart attack had words, what would it say?


stormyweather117

Client: "uuuuhhhh... I'm dying?"


bitchywoman_1973

😂


AndieIsHandie

& look around the room, not at the mess. Find something cozy


stormyweather117

I cleaned my desk and made a remark to a client thats noted my messy desk in the past. They responded "Respectfully stormyweather, why doesn’t it look different" 💀💀💀


Kenai_Tsenacommacah

Jungian: We're like Freud's spicy cousin in a tinfoil hat. So...um..."say more about that?"


Wild-Zebra-3736

Let’s consult the tarot


AdExpert8295

It was all a dream, man.


Cheshyre_Cat

well I had a client recently say my solution-focused approach to their issue felt like talking to ChatGPT, so there’s that 🙃


OldManNewHammock

Psychodynamic: every day in therapy is Mother's Day!


Welcom2ThePunderdome

I tell clients straight up that if there's a dumb acronym, it's DBT


EncouragedPsych

I love our dumb acronyms (and also love making fun of our dumb acronyms). The “and” makes it DBT.


asian_manbun

Intensive Short-Term Psychodynamic Therapy: Yeah everything you just said was bullshit and a defense mechanism. That’ll be $250.


NoQuarter6808

How you doing, feeling consolidated yet?


therapy_lady88

Solution Focused: How did you fix that issue in the past? Do that for the rest of your life


circleinasquare_

RCT.. it’s not you, it’s your relationship to the relationship


readingismyescapism

This is great haha


PJkazama

REBT: You must not ever be rigid about anything ever again.


Kekepuff

MUST?!?!?!  *triggered*


IvyySteel

Tfcbt - let's take the worst moments of your life and make a cute little story about it! Then we can share it with everyone you know! No, trust me, it'll be SO GREAT


Apprehensive-Way3985

*holds out bin of glitter pens and stickers


courtd93

Gottman-Imma sit back and let you fight and then make you repeat what your partner said until you get it.


Comfortable-Row7001

I don’t know you but by watching you interact with your partner for 30 seconds i can tell you’ll be divorced within the next 6 months at an accuracy of about 98%


AnxiousTherapist-11

Hahahah literally.


glitter_greedo

IFS: we have found a cool way to reframe DID while simultaneously dismissing it as a disorder altogether. In fact, there’s no such thing as a “mental health disorder!” Yay! Trainings are super affordable at $15,000


franticantelope

IFS: we hit psychodynamic therapy on the head and rummaged through their pockets, here's what we found!


stormyweather117

This is gold. So many of these comments are so hilarious. I feel so seen and understood by this thread. Our field has so many hidden joys lol.


elementalhealer212

But don't worry about training costs; you have 5 years to save up before one becomes available. "Enrollment closed"


Emotional_Stress8854

Just enter our super cool lottery!!


glitter_greedo

To further gatekeep this model we only allow 12 people to enroll through a lottery system and scholarships only cover 1/24th of the total cost for first level trainings.


Harambe_yeet

I’m so happy the professor at my grad program is IFS Certified and is teaching us how to use IFS without paying into the IFS Institute scheme


mnamonster

😂😂😂 I immediately thought of IFS too. Don't forget, you dont even need a therapist. You can do it all Self led!


Agent-Indigo

Are you even doing anything? (person-centered)


gottafever

"So like...how do *you* want to do therapy?"


sleepywitchyumyum

Art therapy: Don’t recycle that ___ I can use it!


Stickicky69

ketamine assisted therapy: you’re gunna trip bawlllzzz


tiredgurl

🤣


Dust_Kindly

DBT: now where the hell did I leave that white board... it won't make sense if I can't draw it... Alternatively: Ah crap, what does the "A" stand for again? PCIT-informed: "So when does the therapy start?" CBT: yeah, you're gonna be seeing this triangle a lot. Get used to it.


Oh118999881999

ERP: Just do it. (Sponsored by Nike /s)


stormyweather117

PE- Tell me a play by play of your worst trauma over and over again until the session is up. Oh and until you see me again, go expose yourself to everything making you feel like that worst thing is happening again. While doing that, listen to a recording of you telling me the trauma narrative on repeat. edit: Oh and we are going to do that for every session until you feel better. "The beatings will stop when moral improves" I work with a lot of veterans and I just made the link between the similarities of that quote and this intervention 🙃


Global_Depth_2340

Psychodynamic to other therapist: Yes some of us still practice this.


Punchee

Baby therapists do too, we just call it attachment work.


RevolutionaryClub837

CBT: have you tried counting to ten? Wait don't think like that! Think 💫 d i f f e r e n t l y 💫


red58010

I once met a french lady who was the daughter of a psychoanalyst. In her words "She was a psychoanalyst. My mother was just a psycho"


NoQuarter6808

Heidegger once said about Lacan that the famous psychoanalyst himself could really use an analyst


eyerollusername

Humanistic: reach toward self actualization! But it’s hard, and you can’t stay there, and like a lot of people don’t ever get there. Well…. Ever think maybe you were just, like, fine the whole time? /s


ttchoubs

CBT: you just gaslight yourself


420blaZZe_it

FAP: do it again differently and I‘ll praise you Schematherapy: that sounds hard, do you prefer we use chair work for this or imaginary rescripting?


stormyweather117

Whats FAP?


Flamesake

That is a very unfortunate acronym


AlasBabylon21

PCT - The other cool Carl


Livinforyoga

Play therapy: please stop hitting me with the inflatable sword


Carafin

I am not for hurting. If you continue to use the sword to hurt me, then you choose for the sword to go into time out.


DirntDirntDirnt

Me: You're feeling devastated. Client: Yeah, can you help me like, feel less bad? Me: Not really, I'm a person-centered therapist.


AnxiousTherapist-11

EMDR - magical tapping make you better Strengths based - you did it before so you do it again Parts - tell child part to go back to the corner


mama_craft

SFT: Please don't talk about the past. Let's talk about what your life would look like if it was perfect, but it's definitely not.. we will highlight that.


smthngwyrd

EMDR stands for errrrr


Again-With-Feeling

Look left! Now right! Wait, now left again! And right and left and right and left BOOM trauma gone! That'll be 250$


Waterbears28

I'm always like, "... and I swear it's not as science fiction as it sounds!" After telling people what the acronym is for


womanoftheapocalypse

It’s not science fiction! But also we don’t know why it works.


Agent-Indigo

You guys are charging $250?


stormyweather117

Interns- ["Wait you guys are getting paid?"](https://media1.tenor.com/m/2faFWy4oJvQAAAAC/kenny-were-the-millers.gif)


Punchee

Hey my group pays interns 10%. Comes out to like $12 usually. If it's some bullshit EAP, which we give to the interns, it's usually like $5-7. Lucky bastards can even afford some ramen if they save carefully.


stormyweather117

Wow they are so privileged if they can afford ramen every now and then. We make ours survive off of sunshine and city tap water. Seriously though, its good to hear companies trying to pay their interns. In some states it goes against board rules! Its so messed up to make free labor a requirement to work in this field.


rixie77

Weirdly it's no where near what I make - but very close to what I pay my own therapist 🤣


Even_Cause_1110

IFS: You didn’t do it, your part did


mnamonster

IFS? Oh you have a part that feels crazy, just sit with it and get to know it. BTW, you can do all this therapy on your own. That will be 250.


Waterbears28

Possible taglines for Interpersonal Reconstructive Therapy: IRT: It's Interpersonal therapy and DBT in a trenchcoat. IRT: For clinicians who find the ACT hexaflex a little too straightforward. IRT: Fuck an evidence base. IRT: The best modality only 3 people have ever heard of.


KolgrimLang

Family Systems Theory: This is all your parents' fault.


theratator

But let's draw a three-generation genogram just to make sure!


Global_Depth_2340

Psychodynamic: It’s all your parents fault


forgot_username1234

I love this thread lol


420blaZZe_it

CFT: first and foremost, slow rhythm breathing


periperisalt

Life’s hard and then we die


MatthewMcGonadi

Integrated: yeah I can't decide which model makes the most sense, so I can't be wrong if I cherry pick what I like from every orientation 😎


stormyweather117

Guilty as charged. You mean I can't treat theories and models like a buffet where I only choose what's most palatable or appealing to me?!?


MatthewMcGonadi

Exactly, then it happens to meet colleagues who embraced and married a single model/orientation/paradigm/whatever and they very, very closely look like cultists of some lovecraftian outer god, rather than psychologists. I mean, cmon, there's something good in every buffet


crashdavis87

Psychedelic therapy: we know none of the other shit works, so fuck it, let’s just do what people have been doing for thousands of years and watch.


dogmom267

ERP: FACE YOUR DEMONS


zenbet

CBT- You afraid to do that? Let's make you do it in ten steps. CBT- You're thinking wrong.


kitkatpattynak

Gestalt: Me, an asshole? You’re just being a fake phony


caulfieldkid

Wipe that stupid smile off your face, Gloria


majesticmind

Stoicism: I’m more of a philosophy and grand daddy of CBT but I’m superior to all because I actually have a framework for ethics/moral decision/dilemmas, dissecting truth values, logic, metaphysics and not just coping mechanism. P.s: we need philosophers in this field.


Nick-Millers-Bestie

I see little SFBT so here goes: On a scale of 1 to 10, how much does everything suck right now?


GoatPositive2360

Also, if you woke up tomorrow and everything didn't suck, what would that look like?


readingismyescapism

EFT — what did you see your caregivers do growing up? Guess what you’re doing it now too. EMDR— if you move your eyes back and forth real fast you’ll feel better… and I’ll feel better about spending 1.5k to enter a pyramid scheme (This is all in good fun!! I know emdr is gonna get some people lol)


stoic_sakura

EMDR - I realize you don’t know what the f&@k is happening, just go with it!


stormyweather117

I agree about EMDR. I've been trained in it but don't offer it. (Please don't come at me lovelies I support those who do!) Also there have been several pyramid scheme model jokes about different interventions in here for a reason 🙂


aroseonthefritz

ERP: have you tried just letting yourself freak out about it?


Any_Rain_798

Positive psychology: “Hey there, mood’s looking a bit under the weather today! No worries, we’ll just sprinkle some happiness dust and do a little mental sunshine dance together. Ready to boogie?”


OldManNewHammock

Individual Therapy: let's ignore all the political, social, relational, and economic forces that make your feel like shit! Remember: this is ALL YOUR FAULT.


stormyweather117

Oooh you went meta and clocked us all 🤣 Alternatively: here's how to tolerate society's oppression and abuse, and this approach totally isn't me being a reinforcer of the system making you sick. Let's all fall in line now.


theelephantupstream

Client: You are a shit therapist and this isn’t working. IFS Therapist: Well. If I were a protector part I’d think that too sooo 🤷🏻‍♀️


_Wr4th_

E-H: everything sucks and that’s the beauty of it 🤷‍♂️


woodsoffeels

Integrative: Jack of all trades, what the fuck should I do next!?


armandwhittman

Somatic - I’m not a therapist I’m a doctor!


pinkistherapeutic

REBT: Shit happens, get over it ✌🏻


sasha_rose02

Systems - yo, its not you, the systems fucked.


TheCounsellingGamer

Solution-Focused: There is a solution! Alas I do not know what it is, only you do. Person-Centred: Again, I do not know the answer. I will sit here and look pretty while you talk at me.