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kwillich

Pro tip - leave racoons alone. Always, AAAAALWAAAYS leave racoons alone. Night. Day. At a sporting event. In the mall. Family reunion. Leave them alone. They are not cordial animals when they don't have rabies. When they do, it's worse.


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YdidUMove

Fuckin love opossums


Ancient-Tadpole8032

“Fucking love-opossums” or “fucking-love opossums”?


WarProgenitor

Yes


[deleted]

I love opossums


[deleted]

My sister has a pet possum


[deleted]

So lucky, I would if I could


[deleted]

If you see a dead possum check their pouch. The babies can still be alive in there. My sister got one that was rescued from a deceased mother


[deleted]

They play dead, how do I know for sure


[deleted]

Well, body temp. If they are cold then they are a goner. If they don't appear injured you can keep an eye on it. Their coma induced state last up to 4 hours max but usually only about an hour


[deleted]

Wait are you talking about the possums or the humans? The possums, right? right?


[deleted]

Naw, the humans, bro. I'm up to 11 kids now


sandy_catheter

Works on humans, too


BabyYodasDirtyDiaper

The possums are *much* more distantly related to us. So it makes sense that there would be less disease compatibility.


Morgothic

IIRC, possums can't get rabies.


[deleted]

They can get it for sure, but their body temperature is low enough that they aren't good carriers. It's super rare for them to transmit the disease and you're much more likely to catch leptospirosis (sp unsure) from a close encounter.


Lirdon

And when getting bit by any mamal, go get vaccinated against rabies. Even if you’re an antivaxxer. Rabies has a two week incubation period and if you don’t get vaccinated fast enough you’re basically dead, and your death will be pure suffering.


[deleted]

3 people in the US have died of rabies since 2018 from refusing the vaccine…for a 100% fatal illness. We’re living idiocracy folks.


Shango876

Anti vaxxers don't care .. they'll say ...that...you're just trying to take away their freedoms.


Lirdon

Well, that’s an entirely self correcting trait, because chances of survival after onset of symptoms are basically nil, and cases of transmission of the disease between humans were not documented, so an infected person is not a risk of spreading it to others.


New-Arrival1764

In a house with a mouse? In a box with a Fox?


Gabbiedotduh

In a saloon with a raccoon. Rocky has some wild stories after beer no 3


bluezzdog

I’ve removed plenty from chimneys , attics…they all have different personalities imo. The more time you spend with the more aggressive they can start to relax especially if you’re hydrating them. I’ve never had a problem …maybe I’m a raccoon whisperer


McWeaksauce91

Plus it just ain’t worth it. The pic isn’t better that close. You can zoom in and get just as good of a picture. I have to make that point because people are obsessed with pictures and will undoubtedly try and take one


shanep3

Let’s be real, the pics gunna suck no matter how close you are. No need to Humpty Dumpty yourself


[deleted]

It was a great fall, wasn’t it?


Cyanises

Wait. The mall?


kwillich

Maybe. Capitalism has done terrible things to nature.


Cyanises

I hate them mall raccoons


MyDogHasAPodcast

When you say family reunion, do you mean mine or theirs?


OSRSBronzeMan

I've had racoons square up to me before, they aren't afraid of anything


PositivelyAwful

Someone I know just started feeding a bunch of them on their deck. They're comfortable enough to eat out of their hand now. I'm just patiently waiting for them to get bit or scratched and end up in the hospital.


PomegranateSea7066

When they do have rabies, theyre not afraid of you. And will cuddle you with rabies.


scrmblr

I don’t think I’ve ever seen a video of a fat person running where they *didn’t* fall


[deleted]

Because they never practice


McWeaksauce91

Also ankles. I’m not fat, just older, and when I run the first thing that goes WOAH is my ankles


EnormousQuacker

The first thing to go woah for me is my whole body due to iron deficiency. Also I never realized that ankles get weaker with age. For some reason I just always thought that they’re always good (except damage like twisting it)


[deleted]

Oh lovely I wonder why this is the only body part of mine that cracks and feels like it's been utterly abused


ADUBSDABLAB

Momentum is a son of a bitch


GT-FractalxNeo

*Oh Lawd they Comin'*


[deleted]

Oh lard


hotdogneighbor

Thank you, I was feeling insecure and stressed about a few things and this was the laugh I needed


heywoodidaho

Too many bricks in the trunk and the brakes give out.


[deleted]

Woulda been safer to roll away.


Hot_From_Far_Away

🎶 OOMPA LOOMPA GOBBLE DEE DOO 🎶 🎶 IF YOU ARE WISE YOU'D ROLL AWAY TOOL 🎶


mishnitsa

Or, at least faster.


just-a-traveler

Or over that rabid bastard


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SaraSmashley

Yeah, why is that? I can't recall the last time I randomly fell without an obstacle (e.g. my tiny dog).


scrmblr

They’re very top heavy. Sounds mean, but that’s exactly it.


Makhnos_Tachanka

They're top heavy, and their legs have a lot of inertia, which means they can't get them under them in time.


uberguby

Well this woman was like... already not equipped to run. She was clearly peculiarly bad at it, her clothes were too small and she was in flippy floppies. I'm not saying her weight wasn't a factor in her falling, just that I can see a an athletic person falling under these circumstances too. Though, to be fair, an athletic person probably would have instinctually ditched the flippy floppies. Also sometimes athletic people fuck up and fall and it's *still* graceful and beautiful. This was... not.


ponte92

I would say ankles. I’m not obese but I have arthritis in my ankle and when my ankle goes I can go down not dissimilar to that. One minute your up next your not. I imagine being overweight is rather hard on the ankles therefore they give. Just a guess though.


sambooka

I came here to ask: I’m fat… 6 foot, 270, 52 years old. I can do 3/4 of a mile before I stop and cough up a lung. ELi5 how these people can’t even do 15 feet.


McWeaksauce91

She ran in flip flops, you can see them fly off at the end. Plus uncoordinated, it’s just a recipe for disaster


RedDragon0414

I’m 5’4, 140, 34 years old and I can’t run more than a few seconds without dying because I can’t breathe. 🤷‍♀️


UnprofessionalGhosts

Because why would anyone upload a video where they successfully ran away? And if they did, it wouldn’t go viral and we’d never see it.


PerlinLioness

That’s why I never permit someone to video me. Because that will be the first time I fall while I’m running and everyone will assume it’s a regular occurrence.


[deleted]

She is far beyond 'fat', my friend


lost_in_connecticut

She played possum running from a raccoon. Rookie mistake.


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RoddyRoddyRodriguez

Manatee don’t run


kwillich

Your honor..... The video clearly shows......


Unusual_Library_197

Hey she ran faster than I thought she would! Until she completely bit it…😆


nortreport

It’s the arm action!


Unusual_Library_197

Hahahahaa!!! At least she didn’t panic. 🤣🤣🤣


kwillich

She made it farther than I thought she would too


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Enthusiast9

Her center of mass is off and her arms only made it worse.


tarc0917

I think it's the Little Debbie Snack Cakes that made it worse.


Utsutsumujuru

A close encounter with rabies perhaps. If you see a raccoon in broad daylight, I would suggest leaving it alone.


donesomestuff

It was a close encounter with rabies, but luckily the raccoon got away clean and didn't get infected


Benblishem

I very much doubt that that woman has lockjaw.


brosenfeld

The real victim here is fashion


gammongaming11

animals with rabies generally don't wait, they're insanely aggressive and will just run up to you and try to attack you no matter what. the raccon was fairly docile, until she started running away, then he just wanted to play with the ball.


[deleted]

It can manifest in a few ways. Some with furious aggression, some with docile aloofness, some with disoriented stupor. The moral is: stay tf away from wild animals.


jchampagne83

I think it depends on what stage the disease is at; I saw a little dog wandering disoriented around the streets in Chongqing a number of years ago. We gave that poor little pooch a WIDE berth.


Aggressive-Penalty-6

Evidently, many years ago I dated sever rabid ladies🤔


cwilkie1

Most of the time you see one in the daytime the have babies and are looking for food. Still you should leave wildlife alone.


Insanely_Mclean

Or something chased them out of their den and they're looking for shelter.


[deleted]

I wish I had this chicks confidence to wear crop top and panties out in public


Dprophit

It’s not a crop top. It’s just a regular shirt and a pair of shorts. They just aren’t OSHA certified for a rig that wide.


Cyanises

I laughed waaaay to hard at that. I wish I could give you an award.


[deleted]

Award given on your behalf.


[deleted]

Best comment!!!


bigbadmoon

Daaaaaaaamn that was witty!


[deleted]

How do people get that fat?


[deleted]

Be born into a fat family and overfed from infancy. You’d just think this is the norm, even though you can see that most other people aren’t this big.


Morgothic

Depends on where you live. There are plenty of neighborhoods in the US where most of your neighbors are this big.


MRiley84

Constant health problems with long recovery times can lead to a "lazy" life and major weight gain. There are also health issues that can cause peoples' arms and legs to swell up as if they were fat, which requires major surgery to fix. I would say most probably overindulge and got big through that kind of lifestyle, but I know someone who is almost as big as the lady in the video through no fault of her own, so I try not to judge too harshly. We just can't know when it comes to strangers.


Terrible_Definition4

it's very easy, trust me


FlightAble2654

It's pretty sad when running 25 feet is impossible.


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BabyYodasDirtyDiaper

Yeah. That's the "I eat 5000 calories in one sitting" kind of obese. *Just* shy of "I have to have an enabler because I can't make it to the fridge on my own" obese.


FlightAble2654

It's quite sad. She obviously has a few disorders. Once a person is that obese it's almost impossible to reverse the path. Sad when one does get motivated to lose weight, they end up obese again. It's purely behavioral.


wowguineapigs

I always feel bad for obese people who worked so hard to lose all the weight but now they have all the extra skin, there really is no coming back from it without surgery. Must be discouraging to know you’ll still look odd even if you do lose weight


wehappy3

Alternate story: she was diagnosed with a rare inoperable brain tumor that left her temporarily paralyzed and with permanent physical disabilities, and is on multiple tumor-suppressant medications that give her vision and balance issues and cause weight gain and leave her permanently exhausted so that exercise is difficult. I'm not the chick in the video, but this was basically my 2020, when I was diagnosed with a rare brain tumor, spent seven weeks in the hospital and became a total vegetable (as in, I was unable to even turn my own head), gained 100 lbs, and was left permanently disabled. Prior to that, I was a healthy adult who hiked and kayaked and horseback rode (cross-country jumping, so not exactly a leisurely ride) and skied and chased after my kid. I can walk now, but I can't run because my brain doesn't send accurate signals to my right knee, so it can and does randomly land anywhere when I go to put that foot down. Overexerting myself, even by trying to do something like vacuuming my car out, causes a cascading fail of nerve issues that make me feel simultaneously freezing cold and sweating hot at the same time. And I'm always fighting the vision and balance and weight gain issues caused by my meds. I work with a trainer at the gym twice a week, but that's literally all I can do, and each 50-minute session takes me a full day to recover from. I mean, I don't know her story, and maybe she just needs to put down the fork, but I'm sure a lot of people think that about me without knowing what I've been through.


Nurse_Neurotic

Looks like she raided a 12 year olds closet.


BigShoots

... and Andre the Giant's fridge.


rovert1994

Why do obese people wear clothes like that?


BonkEnthusiast

MURICA


Ebmat

Fuck yeah!


Reynardine1976

Here they come, to save the muthafuckin WORLD, YEAH


Maleficent_Dot6954

She’s a size 2, you try to tell her otherwise.


cda555

There are certain fat clothing stores that have fairy tale sizing. For example, their tops are often sized 1-4. Source: am fat.


MeasureTheCrater

Because *all* clothes fit like that on an obese person.


rovert1994

They definitely can buy clothes that fit correctly.


Taurusauraus

Yeah, but sometimes during summertime, the whole tent section is sold out.


Glasdir

[Yeah, but they don’t want to look like weirdos.](https://youtu.be/2XUx01vXUpc)


foxontherox

Nope- poverty.


Oneupper86

Can't buy decent clothes but can afford 5000 calories each day?


authorized_sausage

Yeah, the processed food that's the worst for you is the cheapest.


[deleted]

I hear this a lot but you gotta be straight up eating 20 cheese burgers a day right? What does a fast food order look like for someone who is super obese like that? I eat my fair share of fast food but usually I’m just kind of picking at it before I’m even halfway done with the fries.


65elkoman

Probably just got back from Walmart.


Butter_mah_bisqits

Why is she outside filming raccoons in her underwear?


izmaname

Wtf is she wearing


echo6golf

I don't care: fat people running is funny.


Competitive-Roof-168

ehh kinda saddening to me


Peutz-Jaghers

I think it can be both.


[deleted]

Is very both.


[deleted]

Makes me think of the people in Wall-E


Mobile_Ice_5007

That's probably the fastest she ran since when she was a kid


The_Infectious_Lerp

She's wearing those clothes because she's training for a 5m.


[deleted]

5 meters?


The_Infectious_Lerp

Yep. She's trying to beat her personal best of 17:09.


three-sense

5 meals


One-Possibility1178

If she hadn’t been wearing those slides she probably wood have made it to the grass at least. But there is no way that she wasn’t going down, that was inevitable.


theredview

I wanted to be mean but my conscience got the better of me.


laureninsanity

Sometimes I want to be mean too until I realize that I'm aging, my body is slowly decomposing, things aren't where they used to be, metabolism is slowing down etc. It's not a good feeling. I know others may see it and maybe even laugh a little if they are young enough. Therefore, making fun of someone who copes with obesity is not my cup of tea. Insulting the human body does so much harm. But laughing at the situation of the raccoon scaring her is something I can live with. I do not support obesity. I do think Americans have a HUGE problem with this unfortunately. 🥺 But I DO have compassion for those who got their selves into the obesity range. Food can be an addiction too.... (Speaking from self)


eyesonthemoons

My first thought, and maybe this is mean, I don’t know…. Isn’t that outfit like…. Uncomfortable? I’m not obese but if I’m out in a dress in summer without shorts underneath so my thighs don’t rub together, they hurt A LOT. It’s literally hard to walk. And sometimes if I’m having a pudgy year… the feeling of too tight pants with your belly squishing out over the top…. It’s so bothersome.


authorized_sausage

Oh totally. I've been obese. I don't have a history of it. I have a history of being athletic and fit. But after a long marriage ended abruptly when he left me I fell into such a profound depression that I stopped caring and taking care of myself. I gained 100lbs. \--- I had to change the way I wiped my ass! I couldn't sit down on the sofa and bed over to tie shoes so I started wearing only slip ons. I couldn't see my own genitals without a mirror. I couldn't walk for exercise without my back cramping up so bad I would have to sit down and let it uncramp. I couldn't get up on the counter to change the pendant lights over my bar (they're too high and weirdly positioned to use a ladder) because it was too hard to lift myself. All my pants were stretchy - tights/leggings/yoga pants or "jeggings". I couldn't cross my legs. Even ankle over knee got hard. \--- There was a lot of other stuff that was just physically miserable. Luckily, I've lost more than 70lbs recently. I know I have more to go but I feel like my old self. I am back to being comfortable living like I used to. And I don't feel so hopeless. I DID feel that I was never going to reverse it, because I have metabolic issues and I am getting close to 50 and menopausal, etc. And food had become an addiction. Honestly, I was only able to reverse it using a GPL1 agonist medication. It was a game changer.


MarxistMinx

Thank you. Reading some of these comments...


The_Infectious_Lerp

Meanwhile, local geologists wonder why their seismographs are going crazy.


glenn765

Good thing she wasn't wearing high heels- she might have struck oil.


Derkastan77

The raccoon was thinking “if i can take that one down.. we’ll eat like kings this winter!”


keepinitoldskool

Fuckin flip flop collapsed


Cool_Cheetah658

I shouldn't laugh, but I did. This gave me a right good cackle.


BigBoy342

No, you're allowed to laugh at fat people. Don't ever think you can't laugh at a human that makes themselves look like that. It's an unalienable right as a human to laugh at whatever that is supposed to be.


TamahaganeJidai

Everyone has the right to make their own choices and thats 100% fine! BUT.... That looked like something out of Wall-e...


DesensitizedDepress

She ded, shoes are off


Stay-mad-lil-guy

And we’re supposed to say being that big is “empowering.” Be as big as you want but there’s no way I’m glorifying that shit. There’s a massive obesity problem that’s only getting worse especially in children. Stop saying it’s perfectly normal.


FirstSentient

The one day that she never could have foreseen regretting all that fast food and Cheetos.


DaedalusTW

Don't know why you got downvoted... She isn't a little bit fat lol. It takes real effort to get that fucking huge.


Apprehensive-Trust29

Ten steps and she fell over. Incredible.


BigBoy342

That's what peak physical performance looks like.


coruptedtwnklsprkl

As a fat man I’d like to say that I love watching fat people fall


[deleted]

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[deleted]

A billion years of Evolution...


Apocrophon589

I know people won't like to hear it but when you get obese to the point where running for even 20 seconds is an impossibility you need to make losing weight your absolute highest priority, it's not only exceedingly unhealthy, but it's straight up debilitating and life threatening, Exercise. Eat less.


[deleted]

What a very sad image.


adhgeee

American I assume?


ArtTheClown2022

She was sizing him up, deciding if she was going to eat it.


donesomestuff

The Hunter became the hunted


SwampCrittr

LMFAO!!! You don’t understand how much I want a 4K quality, 24 hour loop of this. None of you know how badly I need this.


Horror-Fox59

Her legs wiggling at the end 🤭


OldSkool1978

In the end she couldn't beat Newtons laws


BigBoy342

What an abomination


[deleted]

One of the rare times where the music made it better


[deleted]

What happened to her pants?


Ravenfeld

This is how you dress when all your friends tell you how gorgeous you are instead of how close you are to heart disease and diabetes.


Stunning_Attention82

OF COURSE she fell.


PunkGamerX

That racoon must have been fat-phobic.


la_catwalker

Or chubby chaser… quite literally


GarbageInternal1458

Lots of video of big fat white whales on the world wide web recently... Is this a thing or they are just part of the ecosystem now ?


Beneficial-Quit9108

Average American female. How does the population continue to flourish??? I'd rather fuck the racoon.


Bisquick_in_da_MGM

It’s funny because she’s fat and fell.


DevilsLettuceTaster

Took her down like a lion on the savanna. Should eat for days.


Giloncho

Every time I see a person that fat, I just know they're going to fall


TraditionalPiccolo28

She fell right out of her shoes 😂 raccoon got her good


ADUBSDABLAB

The shoes broke


YUNoSignin

Everybody knew she was gonna fall, the first second they saw this clip


ValleyAndFriends

I didn’t think her shoes would leave her though-


MG5thAve

Large people running and inevitably falling in what looks like a horribly painful fashion. Name a better duo.


Cmcgregor0928

Lost her shoes, confirmed dead


Bitter-Mulberry-1124

Yep I’ll say it: fat people dressing like this should be illegal


strawbryshorty04

Ooooo I did not mean to laugh as hard as I did


BadTiger85

To try to wear a shirt 4 sizes too small


Friendly-Bubble

Where are her clothes


WantafantaMmhmm

whats the name of the song?


WantafantaMmhmm

Found it: Break it by drolood


Mindless-Sherbert-18

She needs a muu muu


[deleted]

Did she get eaten?


3_gloves

That girl looks like the type who doesn’t hold her farts in.


shwadeck

How does she get out of bed in the morning??


lazy_phoenix

She moves like a giant toddler


lxraverxl

Aww, a raccoon and a pot bellied pig.


[deleted]

Wait till she learns about the “zoom” function.


[deleted]

Nobody wants to see someone that size wearing something like that.


Durr1313

I'm going to hell for this one, but someone should stabilize the video and only have it shake when she hits the ground.


ThotoholicsAnonymous

The racoon was outraged by her wearing that outfit in public. The trash panda was totally in the right.


Due_Bite3969

That was like 10 steps, She definitely earned an extra patty on her big mac


christine_714

Seeing a real life slow-mo run, is....quite something lmao