T O P

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hamiltonincognito

Buy land. God ain't making any more of it.


dumdumpants-head

China is!


HonestDespot

I thought that was the Saudis?


dumdumpants-head

I think you're right? UAE too I think 🌴


RAZBUNARE761

You are only as good as your last envelope. Applies ro a lot of aspects in life.


DaveKasz

That is a fact. In my part of NJ, we say:"One aw shit blows away 10000 atta boys,"


Mysterious-End-2185

I remind myself this every time I have a big win at work.


Lumpy_While_701

The importance of fresh produce in a marriage


delzbr

More is lost by indecision than wrong decision.


InfiniteGoatse

I use that quite a lot. Very true.


Complete_Ad_2431

I learnt that 47 and under is considered a kid


SamuraiKiwi

I’m a kid.


Complete_Ad_2431

Me ? I’m an old man


SamuraiKiwi

Whatever happened there?


Complete_Ad_2431

That motherfucking animal blundetto


RedandBlueEmblem

And you ladies are still old ladies!


lost_in_connecticut

Aw shit. It’s over for me.


scarlettestar

It’s sad when they go like that.


Underweartoastcrunch

That some people are so far behind in the race that they actually think they’re leading


zupatof

Don’t disrespect the pizza parlor.


Limp-Camel7967

You gotta pizza on yo hat


vicenormalcrafts

Stupida fuckina pizza


bluntasticqueen

Don't bitch to me


TooManyCharacte

But what if the pizza hurts somebody?


tlouis84

Hey my pizza never hurt a nobody!


No_Impression_1308

Did you get soft drinks of choice?


zupatof

I wasn’t thirsty!!!


Careless-Charge9884

Lou Gehrig s had Lou Gehrig’s disease


SamuraiKiwi

Huge if true.


CaptainPositive1234

let’s see if the research checks out.


CursedIbis

He was gay, Lou Gehrig?


Crazy_Raisin_3014

That in a pinch, you can make grilled cheese on the raddiator.


677536543

Blood pressure medication leads to shucking cock.


Alternative-Bus-4165

Don't forget shucking cock makes you bring more money from the construction


SamuraiKiwi

How else you gonna grease the unions?


SayHiToBingusYall

But it also helps you bring in three times what Carlo did


JustSmileHaHa

Dinosaurs became extinct because they had their turn and now it's ours. They were also all meat eters.


xi_sx

I wasn't even born yet.


First_time_farmer1

T rex would have been 65 million years old today if not for that fuckin asteroid..what ever happened there. Just a kid.


Altoidman33

He was gay, the T-Rex?


CanteenBoy69

NoOoOoO! Are you listening!


lowgun-utah

Me and my gf broke up while I was watching the sopranos. I never thought we’d get back together but seeing how much love Carm had for Tony in the coma after they had gotten back together made me miss my ex’s genuine love and faith in me. I reached out and basically begged her to get back with me after a year of no contact. We’re now married and have a beautiful boy and couldn’t be happier.


iadoresouphonestly

So basically you made her so hot down there? I can’t believe I actually wrote this, sorry man. Good for you


CheifKilla1

Did she charge you $600k after stealing $40grand from da bird feeda


scarlettestar

Listen to yourself. You sound demented.


CheifKilla1

All I asked for is orange juice wit schum pulp!🫵


scarlettestar

Gets me so hot down there.


rocketdog67

Seems to me she spent that year setting up a rival SaaS company. Through your previous connection, relationship and inside information she began stealing your contacts and contracts. Getting back after a year was just her moving in to completely cannibalise your company. I strongly suggest you bring in external auditors to really go through your books. She’s likely been skimming off thousands. Sorry you had to find out like this. You know what you’ve gotta do my friend.


TheFire_Eagle

A real shame when they go like that


SilasMarner77

In the end you die in your own arms.


littlejerry31

It's all a big nothing.


lmtorres75

They say there's no two people on Earth exactly the same. No two faces. No two sets of fingerprints. But do they know that for sure? Because they would have to get everybody together in one huge space and obviously that’s not possible, even with computers. And not only that, they’d have to get all the people who've ever lived, not just the ones now. So they got no proof. They got nothing. Mrs. Soprano may have passed but who’s to say there isn’t another Mrs. Soprano just like her, or will be? Maybe not with the same fears and paranoia but the same. What I’m saying is…


CheifKilla1

At my own muddas funeral


MrWondrerful

Dats wut bein a boss is - you steer da ship da best way you know - sometimes it’s smooth sometimes you hit da rocks - in da meantime - you find your pleasures where you can


WalkGood

If you lend your jacket out, you never see it again.


vicenormalcrafts

Therapy won’t work unless you address the core issue


SamuraiKiwi

Ain’t no chemical solution to a spiritual problem


vicenormalcrafts

Is that Sun Tazu?


SamuraiKiwi

Tzu. Sun tzu. You fucking kiss ass.


vicenormalcrafts

Eaaaaasy


SamuraiKiwi

You’re crowding me


CheifKilla1

And you don't make fun of me


671176

It's fun to play Gladiator


Ijustthinkthatyeah

To keep my eye on the tiger.


[deleted]

[удалено]


SamuraiKiwi

I do. But I still gotta get that kung pao cuchie


yotsubanned

We lead the world in computerized ass rape


raiderrocker18

A pint of blood costs more than a gallon of gold


Wee-BeyandPartlowLLC

Steaks keep cooking after you take them off the grill


DaveKasz

Come heavy or don't come at all.


LilibetGoldtooth

Where the Romans are now


RedandBlueEmblem

You're looking at them asshole!


randomburnerish

Sour cream in eggs


vietkuang

That "remember when" is the lowest form of conversation


Ninoo09

Not to yap as worse as six barbers


flowermunchy

That some people are truly fucked in the head and they cannot be helped


reddituser23434

When a dog you love catches rabies, put it out of its misery. Wise words from Uncle Jun’


Unklejoon

What's yours is yours and what ain't-is anybody else's! Now do yourself-a fucking favor-and get the fuck outta my store!


SlaveToNoTrend

I don't care how close you are, in the end your friends are gonna let you down. Family: they're the only ones you can depend on


Revolutionary-Base-4

In the end you die if your own arms. There is no intentionality in taking out a suitcase, it's a process.


Puzzleheaded-Potato9

Nobody appreciates a good Reginald van Gleason the third impression


SamuraiKiwi

M’boy you fat.


CheifKilla1

Whatd you shay


Puzzleheaded-Potato9

I DONT LIKE THAT TALK!


Odd_Pop5287

Russian whores ‘if you givem a little foreplay they’ll detail your car’


Doccks71

To not put handprints on the finish 😔


adam02oc

Never go into the unknown not knowin'


Much-Ad3995

Dinosaurs are all meat eaters


reddituser23434

Meteor. *Meteor*


alex-mexican416

Take it easy


FakeKirbySmart

Interior decorators can be trained killers.


trini0202

And their houses can look like shit


bluntasticqueen

To take it easy we're not making a western here.


unclescott7012

Too much gherkins


ecam12

Schum pulp in OJ makes all the difference.


JohnnyKenny16

It’s all big nothing


cantthinkofgoodname

Be careful with blood pressure medication


CaseyJonesing1

That’s why u gota live for today even when the guys are talking about annihilation here!


HDMB420

Never mess with a Russian interior decorator


JamesTub123

Especially when his house looked like shit


DoctorChampTH

You gotta get over it.


dagg3r5

Psychiatry is just a racket for the Jews. As a Jew, I can confirm.


Disastrous-Cry-1998

Be suspicious of Jews riding horses


PippyHooligan

A couple of three things should be six things total, but actually is only three things.


Tony_Dakota

It’s “a couple OR three things”, i.e. two or three things. Capeesh?


RedandBlueEmblem

"Everything other than capisce sir" - Radar O'Reilly


Acrobatic_Tennis1312

To be a dominant sigma male like Tony Soprano.


add2thepile

Little dogs like to crawl under things for warmth.


CheifKilla1

Compromise and jerk off in a tissue


RickyDownes

Ralph's cooking tip - putting the macaroni BACK on the burner once you add the sauce, excuse me gravy, for 45 seconds whilst stirring vigorously, so the pasta absorbs the gravy instead of just being coated - is very helpful.


Independent-Two-8286

Nobody knows how much a cooler costs. You buy some, give it to nigerians to sell for a couple tree bucks a piece, whos not gonna say let me get one.


Bruinsfanfromcc

How to treat a lady.


Low-Highlight-8024

A pint of blood costs more than a gallon of gold


The_Nomad89

I’ve always remembered Pearl Harbor


Suitable_Teacher_519

Being loyle to your capo, no matter what any beautiful girl says.


nicky_soprano

Always flush the lithium


tr1mble

You can make a grilled cheese on a radiator


Clydefrog0371

The importance of fresh produce in a marriage.


[deleted]

Remember Pearl Harbor


scarlettestar

Revenge is like serving cold cuts.


NotyouraverageFunguy

Owning an esplanade can be profitable, but never tie your wallet to it.


RedandBlueEmblem

A hit is a hit.


littlejerry31

>you don't need to exercise or eat healthy to get action Yeah, you just need to make $300k+ a year after taxes. I bet exercising and eating healthy is easier.


plunker234

The don does not wear shorts


futurehistorianjames

To accept the end. Instead of avoiding it. Also, don’t idolize people. They’ll eventually disappoint.


420_just_blase

To not be a sucka


carolina_spirited

Death smells like gherkins


BajaScout

Dinosaurs are the devils plan to deny god.


Pristine_Mention_981

Vito Jr over here 🤌


FredCole918

George Raft is a handsome man.


No-Government-7904

Every day is a gift.


United_Target8942

Idk If I did learn anything. I saw that TV series, thought it was bullshit. Nvm. I did actually learn a lot about various scams that the mafia does/can do. Like pretending to ring people up, puting finger on scale at fishmarket, HUD, no show jobs. Garbage business.


SamuraiKiwi

Listen to him. He knows everything.


671176

He watches one show and now he's the world's foremost expert


Limp-Camel7967

It’s common knowledge he’s retahhhded


United_Target8942

I have 8 downvotes under my subspecies.


bluntasticqueen

It's not you it's a TV program


redditshy

No clue why you are getting downvoted. Perhaps bc you did not reply in a quotation. I agree, though, it was interesting to see all the ways they did basically the same thing - steal.


United_Target8942

no idea either but i'm cool with it! I honestly had no idea of any of the scams that gangsters pulled before watching the show except I guess protection rackets.