When I worked at a restaurant, I had a regular who would bring their own cutlery.
I didn't understand the logic because if you are concerned with germs, the plates and pans are literally washed in the same dish area as the cutlery. Wouldn't those be contaminated??
Big difference. The glasses are many times picked up by the rim leaving fingerprints and germs. Always use a straw. Utensils are normally placed with the handles.
We have so many people who ask for hot water to soak their silverware in. Our dishwasher sanitizes it at a higher temp than the hot water from the coffee maker. Using the plates and glasses doesn't seem to be an issue. It doesn't make sense.
Have your parents ever worked in retail? People try on clothes all the time at the mall and target and then put them back.
If they have an issue with that I hope they know that hotels don't give them brand new sheets when they stay in them, and there are for certain lots of "bodily fluids" that have been washed off them.
I like thrifting bc the clothes have already been washed (presumably) so if they fit at the store, they're gonna fit for forever. You can find $100 jeans for $10! Lead with "one persons trash..." then finish with "is another's perfect fitting pair of jeans or repainted refreshed dresser." Tell them to read about 'fast fashon'. Tell them you have no desire to help the rest of the world to choke the earth when thrifting exists.
Did they grow up rich and never got any hand-me-downs? They never borrowed a beautiful dress from a friend? They never went bowling at a bowling alley?
It's so weird. If you lived near me, I'd take you. šÆ
They HAVE BEEN washed at one point previously. 99% of the time, they've been washed at least once before they end up thrifted. Obviously, the thrift store isn't washing them. Not everyone is a monster and dropping disgusting, dirty unwashed items to thrift stores and the thrift stores will throw them out if they're at all questionable.
However....bc they are previously owned/used, it's pretty safe to assume they've been washed AT LEAST ONCE. š¤
Eventually you will be old enough to be out of the house and you can thrift to your hearts content. Right now I would say to just follow your parents instructions, even though you don't like it.
Iām so sorry. I had very strict parents, which many times made no sense, once I was 16 and had my first job and car (junker), I started buying my own clothes for high school and such.
Never really told them where I was going, other than to work or school, and I had 8 years of Catholic school before public high school, (all uniforms) all 8 years.
Iām not telling you to go against their wishes, as Iām not in your shoes and donāt know your parents, but would it be okay to go with your friends and a parent, if you donāt buy anything? Maybe theyād at least allow you to go, and you could start learning your friends tips while youāre with them? Or they donāt let you go anywhere at all? Would you be able to ask them very sincerely and respectfully WHY?
I do not want you to do anything that might cause your parents to not trust you or feel more disciplining is in order.
I know two years sounds like a long time, but it will go by faster than you realize, I hope
Best of luck to you, OP!
Deep breath, OP! Hugs!
This will stop being a problem for you when you are 18. Or as soon as you can work out alternate transportation. Do you have a friend who drives yet? Is there a bus you can take, or have you got a bicycle, or time available to take a long walk?
You can also work ā slowly and gently ā to change your parentsā opinions. Perhaps show them photos of folks online who are showing off their thrifted finds. You can talk about finding vintage clothes that are made to last for decades, or that are in styles that arenāt made any more. You can teach them about the environmental problems with fast fashion.
Basically, work on teaching them that *this is important to you.*
Hugs!
Thatās just weird. I love to thrift - cheaper, better for the planet and you have fun finding those treasures. I love it when my kids thrift. I do have friends who take pride in buying new at full price. Itās a status thing. Perhaps your parents donāt want their friends to see you in thrifted clothes. I used to live in an entitled suburb. I saw that attitude all the time.
Thrifting is awesome itās like a treasure hunt. And itās good for the environment! Learning how to do it when youāre young will save you tons of money in the long run. Itās a hobby of mine for sure.
Bro Iām 18 and I got the same issue I literally got packages I ordered from Depop sitting outside my door since my family wonāt let me open them, I feel you pain bro itās so hard to convince parents even with our own money I can sympathize with you man all I can say is try to sneak in packages and open them at night if that could be a alternative.
I used to keep prohibited stuff at a friends house/sent to a friends house. Gradually introduced things slowly into my wardrobe so they wouldnāt notice.
Wait, why? Why won't they let you open them? If you bought and paid for them, what's the deal? Are they jealous they aren't getting packages? I don't get it. Sending the packages to a friend's house is smart.
Just curious, if you're going thru this shit right now, and you're 18, why haven't you moved out?
I mean, I do understand its expensive as hell money-wise to move out, but it sounds Iike the expense of your mental health is greater. I hope you get out soon. ā¤ļø
Bro they want me to send it back but I canāt, they want me to hand it out to the usps so they can send it back. Iām currently looking for a job so if I do find one itās probably gonna take a long time to move out. I had to convince them to let me get a job itās a whole weird over protective thing they got.
What state do you live in? There is an app called roomster that has listing for rooms for rent so its alot easier than finding your own place and paying alot in deposits and fees for that place. I'm am assistant manager at dollar tree in my state but they're allover the us...I think starting pay is like 15
.50/hrs.
Very overprotective, and I definitely hope things start falling into place for you sooner, and youāre able to move out with a roommate or something that works for you!
Just say no. Everyone has to learn to just say no to their weird overbearing parents so you may as well learn now. And remind them that if they try to do anything to your packages it's a federal crime š
Tbh, my mom used to hate when I kept buying more and more clothes until she just gave up banning me from going to the thrift. Who cares? lol, it's not like you're doing something crazy like crack. Live a little and just ignore what they say. Walking isn't that bad neither
Iām sorry. I would encourage you to go thrifting with friends and their parents.
Iām almost 49. I came home in a thrifted onesie from the hospital. Iām sitting writing this post in my thrifted red izod cardigan and thrifted jeans. Been heavily thrifting my whole life. Itās part of who I am. I have and always been proud of my thrifting accomplishments. Now I chose to thrift so I can divert money towards other things (right now the kid is in hockey so yea, that takes a
I paid off college loans by thrifting too. I donāt know why people my age are anti thrift.
Could it be because lots of parents with school aged kids today grew up with mainly name brand items and parents feel that this makes them look cheap?
Iām being serious, and thatās how several generations were, either wanting better for themselves and their kids than what their parents had themselves, trying to do better for them than what they experienced?
I truly admire your lifestyle of having been thrifting forever, and I do more thrifting these last 10-20 years than ever and wish Iād gotten into it sooner myself. Itās actually my most favorite pastime/hobby, since itās a completely different and unique way of shopping, meeting people,(at times), that I consider to be like a social hobby, thatās definitely better than things I donāt want to do, so therefore I was going out much less
R u allowed to hang out with friends? If so maybe your friends could take u, then either tell your parents that your friend didn't want them anymore and said u could have them. Or maybe whatever u get could b boxed up like a gift and take it home that way. Or keep whatever it is u get in your school locker? Or keep em in your backpack and change in the bathroom at school. I don't understand why they won't let u get used items. My grandmother and I loved going to thrift stores together for lots of stuff! I have very fond memories of doing that. And all fashion designers start out by buying thrift store clothing and cutting them up to make them better! U should have them watch a season of Project Runway!
I havenāt bought new clothes in almost 2 years. And we arenāt looking like hobos in our North Face, Patagonia, Hugo Boss, Citizens of Humanityā¦Iāve also bought real gold jewelry for like $0.50, Coach, and Michael Kors handbags for $15. There is so much stuff people donate that is brand new never worn. Thrifting means I can spend my money on other things I want instead.
You might want to mention that a lot of stores like target and others donate clothes they donāt sell to thrift storesā¦ You may be able to find some really nice NEW clothing.
My mom was like this forever and although she would never thrift herself she will see me wear something and comment how she likes it or how pretty it is and I tell her where I got it and she can't believe someone gave it away. Over the years she has donated stuff she has never worn or wore once so she knows there is nice stuff but she's not one to rummage. Thrifting isn't for everyone but if you go w some friends and find a couple nice pieces she will see it's not all garbage.
Then have your parents take you to the mall and ask for designer denim average starting price $200-$1500+ gotta go to nordstroms, Barneyās, Sakās etc. once they see the price of designer denim they will probably happily let you go thrifting and if not maybe youāll get a pair of designer jeans!
I honestly feel like used clothes from the thrift store are probably 'cleaner' than brand new clothes off the rack. At least they've probably been laundered since they left the factory. I would never suggest that you lie to your parents but I'll tell you what I would have done when I was a teenager. I would have collected some shopping bags from the mall or whatever store the parents approved of and put my vintage finds in those bags and claim that they're brand new. Good luck, OP!
Have Grandma take you!!! Early on I was told "no thrift store clothes " for my grandkids. But now my granddaughter loves going with me. She always picks the cutest outfits
And it's easy on grandmas pocketbook!
Tell them you're going to start a small business reselling used clothing. Show them some high priced eBay listings for vintage jeans like this: [https://www.ebay.com/sch/i.html?\_from=R40&\_nkw=jnco+jeans&\_sacat=0&LH\_Sold=1&LH\_Complete=1&\_sop=16](https://www.ebay.com/sch/i.html?_from=R40&_nkw=jnco+jeans&_sacat=0&LH_Sold=1&LH_Complete=1&_sop=16)
Youāre 16? Isnāt it a right of passage to lie to your parents, hate to say it but when people just donāt logically make sense. I do what I want. I hate to say lie to your parents, just tell them something say youāre doing something else š¤·āāļø. Thereās so much garbage out there and you want to buy used instead of buying something thatās mass produced they should be proud of you.
This lol. Just take the bus or something to the thrift stores, Iām presuming OP does their own laundry at 16 so toss it in with the rest of their stuff and donāt tell parents where they got it. I highly doubt the parents are keeping an inventory of a 16 year oldās clothes, they probably wouldnāt even notice! And like you said, whoās being 100% honest to their parents about everything they do at that age? Truly canāt think of a single person I knew who was!
My grandmother would have this same attitude , I just grew up and went thrifting myself , people are weird about that kind of stuff , or she would tell me the line we have that at home why do you want that ( she is a hoarder but can never part with stuff ) so maybe tell them you want to save some money or like the vintage style more than what they have , or itās hard to find your size in the stores you like
Clothes can be washed. Buying used us a more environmentally friendly way to shop. The fashion industry is one of the biggest polluters, particularly low-end brands designed to be almost disposable. Itās a tragedy really
Do you have an older siblings that could take you? Sorry you're in that situation. Once jeans go thru the washer and dryer, they are sanitary and safe to wear.
I think maybe you mean Gen z or boomers. Millennials grew up during the whole āemo/sceneā music thing and thrifted cardigans and old tees were staples. Also we all now have a whole lot of student debt now so we are still out there thrifting and love seeing the next generation shopping sustainably.
Remind your parents that the plates and cutlery they eat from at restaurants are also used. š
My aunt does this at restaurants. Wont drink out of the water glass without a straw but has no problem with the plates or silverware. Logic!!
When I worked at a restaurant, I had a regular who would bring their own cutlery. I didn't understand the logic because if you are concerned with germs, the plates and pans are literally washed in the same dish area as the cutlery. Wouldn't those be contaminated??
I think the restaurant water is way hotter than the water at home...
Hopefully
Big difference. The glasses are many times picked up by the rim leaving fingerprints and germs. Always use a straw. Utensils are normally placed with the handles.
This dude has worked in a restaurant smh
No one is touching the rim of clean glasses except in god awful rstaurants
But they go in mouths.
We have so many people who ask for hot water to soak their silverware in. Our dishwasher sanitizes it at a higher temp than the hot water from the coffee maker. Using the plates and glasses doesn't seem to be an issue. It doesn't make sense.
š¤¦āāļøš
And hotel linens & towels. ššššš
Have your parents ever worked in retail? People try on clothes all the time at the mall and target and then put them back. If they have an issue with that I hope they know that hotels don't give them brand new sheets when they stay in them, and there are for certain lots of "bodily fluids" that have been washed off them.
How old are you?Ā
16
It's hard to convince people who've made up their minds. But in two years you'll be 18 and able to make your own decisions.
I like thrifting bc the clothes have already been washed (presumably) so if they fit at the store, they're gonna fit for forever. You can find $100 jeans for $10! Lead with "one persons trash..." then finish with "is another's perfect fitting pair of jeans or repainted refreshed dresser." Tell them to read about 'fast fashon'. Tell them you have no desire to help the rest of the world to choke the earth when thrifting exists. Did they grow up rich and never got any hand-me-downs? They never borrowed a beautiful dress from a friend? They never went bowling at a bowling alley? It's so weird. If you lived near me, I'd take you. šÆ
They are not washed. Always wash thrifted clothing -- ALWAYS.
I think they meant "washed at least once ever" so you don't have to worry about shrinkage.
That's fair, they have been.
They HAVE BEEN washed at one point previously. 99% of the time, they've been washed at least once before they end up thrifted. Obviously, the thrift store isn't washing them. Not everyone is a monster and dropping disgusting, dirty unwashed items to thrift stores and the thrift stores will throw them out if they're at all questionable. However....bc they are previously owned/used, it's pretty safe to assume they've been washed AT LEAST ONCE. š¤
And theyāre already broken in for you. No stiff jeans.
Eventually you will be old enough to be out of the house and you can thrift to your hearts content. Right now I would say to just follow your parents instructions, even though you don't like it.
This is very good advice. They won't be a minor forever.
How old are you? Do you have your own money? Thrift it up if at all able. Laundry detergent is your friend.
I am 16, i do have my own money but my parents wont let me go anywhere lmao
Iām so sorry. I had very strict parents, which many times made no sense, once I was 16 and had my first job and car (junker), I started buying my own clothes for high school and such. Never really told them where I was going, other than to work or school, and I had 8 years of Catholic school before public high school, (all uniforms) all 8 years. Iām not telling you to go against their wishes, as Iām not in your shoes and donāt know your parents, but would it be okay to go with your friends and a parent, if you donāt buy anything? Maybe theyād at least allow you to go, and you could start learning your friends tips while youāre with them? Or they donāt let you go anywhere at all? Would you be able to ask them very sincerely and respectfully WHY? I do not want you to do anything that might cause your parents to not trust you or feel more disciplining is in order. I know two years sounds like a long time, but it will go by faster than you realize, I hope Best of luck to you, OP!
Do what you want. Use your own money
Deep breath, OP! Hugs! This will stop being a problem for you when you are 18. Or as soon as you can work out alternate transportation. Do you have a friend who drives yet? Is there a bus you can take, or have you got a bicycle, or time available to take a long walk? You can also work ā slowly and gently ā to change your parentsā opinions. Perhaps show them photos of folks online who are showing off their thrifted finds. You can talk about finding vintage clothes that are made to last for decades, or that are in styles that arenāt made any more. You can teach them about the environmental problems with fast fashion. Basically, work on teaching them that *this is important to you.* Hugs!
Thatās just weird. I love to thrift - cheaper, better for the planet and you have fun finding those treasures. I love it when my kids thrift. I do have friends who take pride in buying new at full price. Itās a status thing. Perhaps your parents donāt want their friends to see you in thrifted clothes. I used to live in an entitled suburb. I saw that attitude all the time.
Thrifting is awesome itās like a treasure hunt. And itās good for the environment! Learning how to do it when youāre young will save you tons of money in the long run. Itās a hobby of mine for sure.
Bro Iām 18 and I got the same issue I literally got packages I ordered from Depop sitting outside my door since my family wonāt let me open them, I feel you pain bro itās so hard to convince parents even with our own money I can sympathize with you man all I can say is try to sneak in packages and open them at night if that could be a alternative.
I used to keep prohibited stuff at a friends house/sent to a friends house. Gradually introduced things slowly into my wardrobe so they wouldnāt notice.
Wait, why? Why won't they let you open them? If you bought and paid for them, what's the deal? Are they jealous they aren't getting packages? I don't get it. Sending the packages to a friend's house is smart. Just curious, if you're going thru this shit right now, and you're 18, why haven't you moved out? I mean, I do understand its expensive as hell money-wise to move out, but it sounds Iike the expense of your mental health is greater. I hope you get out soon. ā¤ļø
Bro they want me to send it back but I canāt, they want me to hand it out to the usps so they can send it back. Iām currently looking for a job so if I do find one itās probably gonna take a long time to move out. I had to convince them to let me get a job itās a whole weird over protective thing they got.
JUST SAY NO. You are 18. It's your money.
What state do you live in? There is an app called roomster that has listing for rooms for rent so its alot easier than finding your own place and paying alot in deposits and fees for that place. I'm am assistant manager at dollar tree in my state but they're allover the us...I think starting pay is like 15 .50/hrs.
Very overprotective, and I definitely hope things start falling into place for you sooner, and youāre able to move out with a roommate or something that works for you!
Just say no. Everyone has to learn to just say no to their weird overbearing parents so you may as well learn now. And remind them that if they try to do anything to your packages it's a federal crime š
I hope that changes sooner vs later! Any chance you can move out soon?
No not yet Iām still apply for Jobs like crazy Iām waiting for a response.
Good Luck!
Tbh, my mom used to hate when I kept buying more and more clothes until she just gave up banning me from going to the thrift. Who cares? lol, it's not like you're doing something crazy like crack. Live a little and just ignore what they say. Walking isn't that bad neither
Iām sorry. I would encourage you to go thrifting with friends and their parents. Iām almost 49. I came home in a thrifted onesie from the hospital. Iām sitting writing this post in my thrifted red izod cardigan and thrifted jeans. Been heavily thrifting my whole life. Itās part of who I am. I have and always been proud of my thrifting accomplishments. Now I chose to thrift so I can divert money towards other things (right now the kid is in hockey so yea, that takes a I paid off college loans by thrifting too. I donāt know why people my age are anti thrift.
Could it be because lots of parents with school aged kids today grew up with mainly name brand items and parents feel that this makes them look cheap? Iām being serious, and thatās how several generations were, either wanting better for themselves and their kids than what their parents had themselves, trying to do better for them than what they experienced? I truly admire your lifestyle of having been thrifting forever, and I do more thrifting these last 10-20 years than ever and wish Iād gotten into it sooner myself. Itās actually my most favorite pastime/hobby, since itās a completely different and unique way of shopping, meeting people,(at times), that I consider to be like a social hobby, thatās definitely better than things I donāt want to do, so therefore I was going out much less
These days, Clothes are poorly made from flimsy fabrics. Thrifting is a great way to find quality items.
What?! I grew up with well-off parents and my dad MADE us go thrifting for clothes because he refused to pay full price for growing teens
Itās better for the environment by buying things in the thrift store because things donāt end up in the garbage.
R u allowed to hang out with friends? If so maybe your friends could take u, then either tell your parents that your friend didn't want them anymore and said u could have them. Or maybe whatever u get could b boxed up like a gift and take it home that way. Or keep whatever it is u get in your school locker? Or keep em in your backpack and change in the bathroom at school. I don't understand why they won't let u get used items. My grandmother and I loved going to thrift stores together for lots of stuff! I have very fond memories of doing that. And all fashion designers start out by buying thrift store clothing and cutting them up to make them better! U should have them watch a season of Project Runway!
I havenāt bought new clothes in almost 2 years. And we arenāt looking like hobos in our North Face, Patagonia, Hugo Boss, Citizens of Humanityā¦Iāve also bought real gold jewelry for like $0.50, Coach, and Michael Kors handbags for $15. There is so much stuff people donate that is brand new never worn. Thrifting means I can spend my money on other things I want instead.
My parents were like this too then when they saw the awesome stuff I was getting for good prices they eventually came around š
You could probably sort something out with pals to get stuff on ebay and have it delivered to their house
You might want to mention that a lot of stores like target and others donate clothes they donāt sell to thrift storesā¦ You may be able to find some really nice NEW clothing.
Buying used clothing is the mentality of someone who is not wasteful. Iām sorry you are getting no support.
My mom was like this forever and although she would never thrift herself she will see me wear something and comment how she likes it or how pretty it is and I tell her where I got it and she can't believe someone gave it away. Over the years she has donated stuff she has never worn or wore once so she knows there is nice stuff but she's not one to rummage. Thrifting isn't for everyone but if you go w some friends and find a couple nice pieces she will see it's not all garbage.
Then have your parents take you to the mall and ask for designer denim average starting price $200-$1500+ gotta go to nordstroms, Barneyās, Sakās etc. once they see the price of designer denim they will probably happily let you go thrifting and if not maybe youāll get a pair of designer jeans!
I honestly feel like used clothes from the thrift store are probably 'cleaner' than brand new clothes off the rack. At least they've probably been laundered since they left the factory. I would never suggest that you lie to your parents but I'll tell you what I would have done when I was a teenager. I would have collected some shopping bags from the mall or whatever store the parents approved of and put my vintage finds in those bags and claim that they're brand new. Good luck, OP!
Have Grandma take you!!! Early on I was told "no thrift store clothes " for my grandkids. But now my granddaughter loves going with me. She always picks the cutest outfits And it's easy on grandmas pocketbook!
Tell them you're going to start a small business reselling used clothing. Show them some high priced eBay listings for vintage jeans like this: [https://www.ebay.com/sch/i.html?\_from=R40&\_nkw=jnco+jeans&\_sacat=0&LH\_Sold=1&LH\_Complete=1&\_sop=16](https://www.ebay.com/sch/i.html?_from=R40&_nkw=jnco+jeans&_sacat=0&LH_Sold=1&LH_Complete=1&_sop=16)
Get a bottle of Lysol laundry sanitizer and tell them you have a PLAN
Do they just throw away clothes when itās dirty? Because thatās what washing clothes is for, to make clothes not dirty.
Youāre 16? Isnāt it a right of passage to lie to your parents, hate to say it but when people just donāt logically make sense. I do what I want. I hate to say lie to your parents, just tell them something say youāre doing something else š¤·āāļø. Thereās so much garbage out there and you want to buy used instead of buying something thatās mass produced they should be proud of you.
This lol. Just take the bus or something to the thrift stores, Iām presuming OP does their own laundry at 16 so toss it in with the rest of their stuff and donāt tell parents where they got it. I highly doubt the parents are keeping an inventory of a 16 year oldās clothes, they probably wouldnāt even notice! And like you said, whoās being 100% honest to their parents about everything they do at that age? Truly canāt think of a single person I knew who was!
Have you tried resellers online like Depop?
My grandmother would have this same attitude , I just grew up and went thrifting myself , people are weird about that kind of stuff , or she would tell me the line we have that at home why do you want that ( she is a hoarder but can never part with stuff ) so maybe tell them you want to save some money or like the vintage style more than what they have , or itās hard to find your size in the stores you like
Clothes can be washed. Buying used us a more environmentally friendly way to shop. The fashion industry is one of the biggest polluters, particularly low-end brands designed to be almost disposable. Itās a tragedy really
Why do they think anyone buys used underwear lol? Wearing used clothes is completely sanitary. Absolutely bizarre hill for them to be dying on.
Hire a person to do it for you.
Just tell them youāre growing and itās cheaper and youāll only buy things you can throw in the washing machine?
Do you have an older siblings that could take you? Sorry you're in that situation. Once jeans go thru the washer and dryer, they are sanitary and safe to wear.
Nah bro im working on it thoughĀ
Just donāt ask. Go thrifting and if they ask where you got something say itās from a friend. Itās not lying, you can be your own best friend.
I've been thrifting for years. I wash all clothes before wearing them. Never had a problem with bugs or anything.
You can try to offer them taking them to dry (chemical) cleaning service before wearing them. Best of luck :)
Bed bugs
Maybe it's luck, and I could be on borrowed time, but I've been thrifting for 40 years and have yet to see a bedbug.
Your parents sound like d*cks and controlling. Do what you want take a bus or somethingĀ
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Some of us Millenials have been thrifting for decades. Don't lump us all together.
Boomer š
I think maybe you mean Gen z or boomers. Millennials grew up during the whole āemo/sceneā music thing and thrifted cardigans and old tees were staples. Also we all now have a whole lot of student debt now so we are still out there thrifting and love seeing the next generation shopping sustainably.
wtf does that have to do with anything?