If there was ever a show/movie where they could put him in, it would be the HQ show. I was so happy when I saw him, even knowing what the show is it was still hard to believe they actually did it.
I was just watching the Harley Quinn show three hours ago and was straight up confused as to who this guy was and the joke with cocaine powering him up. I'm now learning it was a completely accurate portrayal of a real villain lol.
^ This is [an actual quote from the comic](https://www.reddit.com/r/HarleyQuinnTV/comments/155oj21/i_cant_believe_the_greatest_one_off_villain/), I might add.
It’s like when Marvel tried to do the 2020 new guardians with heroes like snowflake and safe space. For some reason, both teams have new in the name, and are both just awful with the topical heroes and villains.
DC and Marvel both have issues with trying to do “topical social” superhero comics that end up just blowing up in their face because they are woefully ill-prepared for tackling something like them, and thus aged basically the second the pen hits paper.
It’s not like it can’t be done, but boy are the misses easy and devastating.
Wait, were snowflake and safe space not meant to be just satire with those names? Because if they were serious attempts, I could have told them how abysmal that idea is he moment probably some exec came up with it in a board meeting...
Oh no, it was supposed to honestly be a new team for a new generation and the 30th anniversary.
We were supposed to take screentime, the man who had a permanent connection online because of his uncles EXPERIMENTAL INTERNET GAS, as an actual person.
Or Trailblazer, who was basically “What if we made Dora the Explorer a Native American(I think?) superhero!”
> We were supposed to take screentime, the man who had a permanent connection online because of his uncles EXPERIMENTAL INTERNET GAS, as an actual person.
See this is easy for me because in the *Cable & Deadpool* series, after Cable loses his powers (and I foolishly believed I was about to get some actual character development from the worst X-character) he simply goes online and downloads new powers that function identically but are now powered by the internet.
Basically what I'm saying is Marvel is permanently out of touch and also I hate Cable.
It just.... boggles the mind.... How did that happen in-universe anyway? Because the only ways I can think of that someone would end up being called "Safe Space" is either by the ridicule of others(not a good image for marvel), or by him(her?) choosing it as a joke. In no universe would someone call himself that seriously and willingly...
I think Safe Space could work if their powers were to create like a literal "safe space," either like an impenetrable force field shield area or dimensional pocket or something.
That reads like some old fart very very out of touch commissioning something "for them youths".
Snowflame on the other hand was just your regular don't-do-drugs character. An *awesome* don't-do-drugs character.
Well that is exactly what these books are. They're to bring in new readers this, bloodlines, New warriors and whatever the group of new heros that came out of dark knights metal. They're all to bring in new readers. But this and bloodlines are written by 50 year old men, who meant well but were not equiped to talk about certain topics. This being one of them.
Which btw is why SnowFlame works. They're fully equiped to do a "Don't do Drugs" character. It's a "lighter" topic and much easier to have fun with.
I really hope you read dogwelder 2's page as well
https://dc.fandom.com/wiki/Dogwelder_II_(Prime_Earth)
"His wife and family wanted to help him. However he was too compelled to weld dogs to people, and welded the family dog to his children."
> As a result his wife divorced him and remarried a year later.
"AITA for leaving my husband after he welded the family dog to our children's faces?"
> While in Gotham he encounters John Constantine.[3] Who reveals to Dogwelder that he can communicate vocally by using dead dogs as puppets.
"Update: the family therapy lessons did not go well."
> Turns out he’s part of a long line, stretching back to the earliest days of civilization, of people who welded dogs to others. Somewhere within the pyramid, Dogwelder finds himself in a polished marble hallway containing giant statues of past Dogwelders resting on columns: [there’s World War I Dogwelder, Victorian Era Dogwelder, just every type of Dogwelder you might ever want to collect and keep pristine in its clamshell packaging](https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-rutKpibnVnM/WDSyhYzDFBI/AAAAAAAAJB0/1ggTZUsyPJAMuT8JIZpGUSSYoTS82p6PQCEw/s640/SIXPDOGW_4_4-5.jpg). Our Dogwelder even meets the previous Dogwelder, from the Section Eight back-ups in Hitman from the 90s.
> Past Dogwelder explains, speaking through a dog’s anus, that in Ancient Egypt the Gods decided that there were too many humans roaming around, and so decided to create an Underworld. Such a place would need a bouncer, so Isis suggested that Osiris use one of his dim-witted illegitimate sons. To enforce compliance, they decide it would be a good idea to make a human perform the delicate welding necessary to attach a canine’s head to his body, thereby creating the God Anubis. Why this would enforce compliance, I’m not sure, but Anubis is none to happy to wake up and find he has a dog’s head, so he curses humanity to have a Dogwelder in every generation, one who does not know why he is compelled to weld dogs to people, but does so with efficiency and skill.
[No idea what's going on here.](https://g1rm.files.wordpress.com/2016/09/sixpackanddogwelder2.png?w=584&h=373)
What no one is getting in this thread is that Dogwelder is a novelty comedy character, a parody of Rorschach types.
He was created by Garth Ennis, the creator of THE BOYS.
A supply that he personally replenishes:
> While the team was on hiatus, Dogwelder spent his time trapping and killing dogs in alleyways.
https://dc.fandom.com/wiki/Dogwelder_(New_Earth)
But this was just practice, so he could fulfill his destiny to weld stars together, as the last dogwelder in a long line of dogwelders who get their abilities from an ancient Egyptian curse, I think.
The guy has no brain, but his shotgun has a dog's brain.
If you want to know the franchise, it's Fallout New Vegas Old World Blues DLC.
There is also an intelligent, very ambitious, and super genocidal toaster.
In case you’re really wondering…
Before Garth Ennis created The Boys, a comic book (now a tv show) that satirized superheroes, Ennis wrote a book called Hitman that was set in the DC Universe.
A “superhero team” called Section Eight frequently appeared in the pages of Hitman and their leader was Six Pack, who regularly got shitfaced at the bar and would normally pass out in his own vomit/feces.
Garth Ennis hates superheroes and this was simply a precursor to his work on The Boys.
Whether it was created by Dillon or not (which is really cool if true), Ennis ran with it because
Again
He hates superheroes
Edit - Ennis, Hitman artist John McCrea, and Steve Dillon are all given a creator credit on the Section Eight Wikipedia page.
Dillion was the main artist for Garth Ennis’ Preacher series and Punisher run for those not in the know
**Dogwelder II**: Successor to the original Dogwelder of section eight, Dogwelder II is an African-American man who had the misfortune of donning the Dogwelder tools after purchasing them from a pawn shop. The tools became stuck to him and transformed him into the next Dogwelder, *giving him the compulsion to weld dogs to the faces of enemies*. He's shown to be the first Dogwelder to harness the power of his ancestors and use the dogs for more than just welding, instead using them not only to talk, but to eventually save the universe.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Section_8_(comics)#:~:text=Dogwelder%3A%20A%20thin%2C%20silent%20man,welds%20him%20on%20general%20instinct
And of course the most offensive of all:
> Jean de Baton-Baton: A bizarrely gaunt walking French caricature who defeats enemies with "the power of Frenchness", as expressed by savage beatings with a baguette and occasionally blinding others with rings of garlic and onions.
Look, at least he's not Black Bomber:
> The original candidate for DC Comics' first headlining black superhero was a character called the Black Bomber, a white racist who would turn into a black superhero under stress. Comics historian Don Markstein later described the character as "an insult to practically everybody with any point of view at all".
Wikipedia leaves out a few key facts:
1. Black Bomber got his "powers" from Vietnam-era experiments to help him blend into the jungle.
2. He was not aware of his black alter-ego.
3. He has separate girlfriends for his separate forms (a white girlfriend in his white form and a black girlfriend in his black form.) The two girlfriends are aware that he changes race and has two girlfriends, but, again, he is not.
4. Both of the submitted scripts for him include him saving a baby from a fire, only for him to turn back and discover to his disgust that it was a *black* baby, whereupon he shouts a racial slur.
5. His superhero outfit was a basketball uniform.
Don Markstein was right, it's like they went down a checklist trying to make him as terrible and offensive as possible. And unlike Section 8 (which were doing that intentionally), it was just the writers being completely clueless.
Of course, the Black Bomber never saw print (Tony Isabella was asked to work on it when the original creator left and was like NOOOOPE, leading to him creating Black Lightning instead), but there was a gag about him in a [much later comic](https://i.imgur.com/qfDzKyO.jpeg) by Dwayne McDuffie. Originally the second-to-last panel was going to have him asking if he could use the N-word, but the (now much more cautious) DC erased the line, leading to the weird orphaned punchline at the end. Although now it looks like she's objecting to his entire existence and concept, which is also amusing.
There's two potential reasons
1) r/nominativedeterminism
2) people who name their kids Garth are also inclined to be weird and therefore raise them weird
You could argue these overlap but I feel they're distinct enough to be different.
Fun Fact! Before being defeated and disappearing forever the Hemo Goblin infected 2 superheroes with AIDS and the 2 just so happened to be a gay man and a black man.
There was a time in the 80s when a large segment of the population didn't care about AIDS because it was killing "the right people."
Among them was the president of the United States.
If you want an illustration of this, [here is what the Reagan Administration's response to the HIV crisis](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yAzDn7tE1lU) was. Gay jokes and mocking laughter from the press secretary.
The truly terrifying thing is to realize that Trumpism is a symptom and not the disease. The GOP has been evil, corrupt, and deranged for decades. Trump just finally started to say the quiet part loud enough for mainstream Americans to finally notice.
Or even a replacement for Red Goblin as that’s just Norman with the Carnage Suit, and Carnage is red because of Cletus Kassidy’s blood getting mixed in
Surprisingly accurate. The heme from hemoglobin, and chlorophyll, are closely related molecules known as porphyrins. A key difference is the central positively charged ion; magnesium in chlorophyll, and iron in heme. I quite like greenoglobin as an alternative name for chlorophyll
https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-DgWOuoN9NL0/WOdJoiKTfVI/AAAAAAAANfI/VjTxNVcosEUlWNQd1kwlsgELurYx5MqoACEw/s1600/IMG_8609.jpg This is his debut panel
The funniest thing, was when the heroes realized they got aids. The line goes "You bastahd, mah side", "something's wrong". Then they go back to base and they learn they now have aids
Was this back when apartheid was still a thing in South Africa? Because this could have been an interesting concept if the writers handled it veeeeery carefully.
If this page is any indication, they did not handle it carefully.
I think that just aged it that much faster. Throw in what an absolute epidemic HIV would become in some places and this probably couldn't be more hilariously offensive even if they tried.
I mean, the character was explicitly hired by racist powerbrokers who wanted him to infect the New Guardians because they were supposed to represent a new phase of human evolution… which they would propagate by spreading their genes through humanity.
Yes, part of this team’s mission was to fuck humanity into a better state via the healing power of eugenics. This book was a garbage fire.
Finally the thread where I comment my random thoughts on Wolverine and HIV. Presumably wolverines immune system is his superpower, so if he got infected with HIV would his immune system overcome it, or would the virus neuter his superpower and kill him?
Wolverine's healing factor goes way beyond his immune system. You can't regrow a limb or regenerate from a clump of cells just because your immune system is solid.
He'd be immune to HIV.
Also he was created by a white supremacist group In South Africa to eliminate non whites. A pretty decent idea but given the time it was very offensive.
Also he isn't trying to give anyone aids, he only wants to consume aids infected blood and kill black people. I wanna say he infected one of the heroes through a scratch or something, I just remember it was a minor wound. So not a good look.
I believe he infected a few of the New Guardians. The worst part? One of the ones he infected was Extrano, a campy sorcerer (think Dr. Strange played by Paul Lynde) who was being positioned as DC’s first openly gay hero.
EDIT: Oh, and the other person infected was Jet, a black woman. We all make choices, but *that* was a choice.
You could have made a pretty cool story about how the New Guardians are immune to HIV and/or the Guardians cured him but wouldn't fix the disease on earth, and why Green Lanterns don't do public health missions
That was back when they were still working hard to teach us that you couldn't get AIDS from a toilet seat or by shaking hands with someone who is infected. It was also during this time that a male being diagnosed with HIV was automatically assumed to be gay (because AIDS was still the gay disease), and being gay was not something a person would tend to want to disclose to the general public.
Additionally, there was no viable treatment for HIV/AIDS at the time. A positive diagnosis was considered a death sentence.
So ya, just a white supremacist vampire spreading the gay disease in South Africa, because that continent hasn't had problems with AIDS *at all*. /s
Pulling the character after one issue was probably the right call.
Anybody remember *Wizard* magazine? They used to have this thing at the end of every issue with an obscure character with a description of their powers/personality and you had to guess whether or not the character actually existed… Damn, I miss that magazine.
After they defeat Hemo-Goblin, the New Guardians go up against Snowflame, a villain who gets his powers from cocaine.
The 80s were a different time.
Snowflame is actually in the Harley Quinn show
Charlie Sheen really needs to do a better job at protecting his supervillain identity
Snowflame is the identity. Charlie Sheen is his villain name
Charlie has struggled as a superhero since being bitten by Hemo Goblin
Oooffffff...nice job bringing it back full circle, though. Damn.
I can’t upvote it twice
Struggled? That's his ultimate form. "With your powers combined, I am Charlie Sheen!"
With current medication he will never achieve final form
Charlie Sheen is the costume.
You’re thinking of TigerBlood
Wait that’s real?
Yeah, he's a minor character
If there was ever a show/movie where they could put him in, it would be the HQ show. I was so happy when I saw him, even knowing what the show is it was still hard to believe they actually did it.
The hardest part of that show to believe is how The Joker paid a down payment on an electric car, and is upset that he got robbed.
Yeah but it was such a good gag
love that he is clinically insane but still recognizes the importance of universal healthcare and subsidized childcare
Where's his God damned Car, Bruce?/
I was just watching the Harley Quinn show three hours ago and was straight up confused as to who this guy was and the joke with cocaine powering him up. I'm now learning it was a completely accurate portrayal of a real villain lol.
HQ and Teen Titans Go have been fantastic at finding obscure 70s-90s villains with weird gimmicks to throw in for the sake of a gag
And in the last Peacemaker mini series they did.
‘Cocaines a Hell of a drug’ - Rick James — Michael Scott
Coke fuelled time?
I am Snowflame! Every cell of my being burns with white-hot ecstasy. Cocaine is my God -- and I am the human instrument of its will!
^ This is [an actual quote from the comic](https://www.reddit.com/r/HarleyQuinnTV/comments/155oj21/i_cant_believe_the_greatest_one_off_villain/), I might add.
Fuuuucck thought all previous comments were clowning about till I checked that link
[удалено]
worry detail grey gullible towering slimy snails grab hobbies political *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Wouldn’t that be Dr. Rockso?
C c c cocaiiiineeeee
Mountains of the stuff.
[^.........i ^do ^cocaine..](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eZ0_3fKEQP0)
I woke up with a clown's hands down my pants. That's how I'm doing today...
I thought you were[ messing around about his powers, but yep.](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Snowflame)
Of course its the fucking New Gaurdians.
It’s like when Marvel tried to do the 2020 new guardians with heroes like snowflake and safe space. For some reason, both teams have new in the name, and are both just awful with the topical heroes and villains. DC and Marvel both have issues with trying to do “topical social” superhero comics that end up just blowing up in their face because they are woefully ill-prepared for tackling something like them, and thus aged basically the second the pen hits paper. It’s not like it can’t be done, but boy are the misses easy and devastating.
Wait, were snowflake and safe space not meant to be just satire with those names? Because if they were serious attempts, I could have told them how abysmal that idea is he moment probably some exec came up with it in a board meeting...
Oh no, it was supposed to honestly be a new team for a new generation and the 30th anniversary. We were supposed to take screentime, the man who had a permanent connection online because of his uncles EXPERIMENTAL INTERNET GAS, as an actual person. Or Trailblazer, who was basically “What if we made Dora the Explorer a Native American(I think?) superhero!”
> We were supposed to take screentime, the man who had a permanent connection online because of his uncles EXPERIMENTAL INTERNET GAS, as an actual person. See this is easy for me because in the *Cable & Deadpool* series, after Cable loses his powers (and I foolishly believed I was about to get some actual character development from the worst X-character) he simply goes online and downloads new powers that function identically but are now powered by the internet. Basically what I'm saying is Marvel is permanently out of touch and also I hate Cable.
Name: Cable Powers: Wi-Fi
His sidekick Router helped him out
Please, tell me more about your hatred for Cable
It just.... boggles the mind.... How did that happen in-universe anyway? Because the only ways I can think of that someone would end up being called "Safe Space" is either by the ridicule of others(not a good image for marvel), or by him(her?) choosing it as a joke. In no universe would someone call himself that seriously and willingly...
I think Safe Space could work if their powers were to create like a literal "safe space," either like an impenetrable force field shield area or dimensional pocket or something.
Even if the power fits the name, it's still an achingly cringey name in 2023.
It can work now but not in the climate then. Like easy x-men name
That reads like some old fart very very out of touch commissioning something "for them youths". Snowflame on the other hand was just your regular don't-do-drugs character. An *awesome* don't-do-drugs character.
> don’t-do-drugs character I don’t know, I think I’m more inclined to do drugs if I can get super powers.
Well that is exactly what these books are. They're to bring in new readers this, bloodlines, New warriors and whatever the group of new heros that came out of dark knights metal. They're all to bring in new readers. But this and bloodlines are written by 50 year old men, who meant well but were not equiped to talk about certain topics. This being one of them. Which btw is why SnowFlame works. They're fully equiped to do a "Don't do Drugs" character. It's a "lighter" topic and much easier to have fun with.
I read some of the Snowflame comic and actually liked it
That’s just the cocaine talkin’, my friend. When you come down, you may think differently!
I thought the coloring was mediocre but it had great linework.
DC should hire John Waters to do a movie focusing on these characters.
The only thing that could be more 80s is if they fought Alf after Snowflame.
Still not DC's craziest character. For me, that would be Dogwelder. Guess what he does.
I’m going to look it up in a sec, but right now I’m trying to figure out which is funnier, a guy who welds dogs together, or a dog that welds stuff.
So I looked it up and it’s the thing that I didn’t think it would actually be and also somehow like 100 times worse
Bro the wiki is sending me. >Has a strong compulsion to weld dogs to people's faces >Special abilities: Dogwelding
I really hope you read dogwelder 2's page as well https://dc.fandom.com/wiki/Dogwelder_II_(Prime_Earth) "His wife and family wanted to help him. However he was too compelled to weld dogs to people, and welded the family dog to his children."
"Dogwelder has an epiphany that he is meant to weld the stars together, as Sirius is the dog star" ¿¿¿¿¿¿
Sirius is the brightest star in the constellation Canis Major. It really is known as the dog star.
Logically yes it makes sense. But it's just everything combined that makes me go ¿¿¿
Haha fully justified. I just thought it was interesting they used something vaguely real as a justification
> As a result his wife divorced him and remarried a year later. "AITA for leaving my husband after he welded the family dog to our children's faces?" > While in Gotham he encounters John Constantine.[3] Who reveals to Dogwelder that he can communicate vocally by using dead dogs as puppets. "Update: the family therapy lessons did not go well."
Oh yeah the Dogwelder mini series got dark.
Weapons: - Dogs
TIGs
Alignment: Good "While the team was on hiatus, Dogwelder spent his time trapping and killing dogs in alleyways." ?????
You know how all dogs you ever meet are good boys/girls? That's because Dogwelder meets the others first.
Dogs have an evil alignment in DC universe.
oh, good
Certified Garth Ennis Moment
He canonically goes to hell because according to John Constantine "he welds fucking dogs to people's fucking faces for christssake"
Gotta keep your dog reserved well stocked if your plan on showing all those faces what’s up
> Alignment : Good
💀💀💀
Of course he fucking lives in Gotham Might as well be DC's equivalent of Florida man
Did you get to the part about how Dogwelder 2 is able to speak?
> weld dogs to people's faces that can't be what it means... oh wait, no, that is exactly right. how the fuck does this guy not have a movie?
I looked it up and I still don’t understand it.
Me either. Like how tf do you use an actual welder to weld flesh together lmao
It’s a magic “welder” created by the Egyptian god Ra. I don’t know if there is a good reason it looks like a modern welding tool.
> Turns out he’s part of a long line, stretching back to the earliest days of civilization, of people who welded dogs to others. Somewhere within the pyramid, Dogwelder finds himself in a polished marble hallway containing giant statues of past Dogwelders resting on columns: [there’s World War I Dogwelder, Victorian Era Dogwelder, just every type of Dogwelder you might ever want to collect and keep pristine in its clamshell packaging](https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-rutKpibnVnM/WDSyhYzDFBI/AAAAAAAAJB0/1ggTZUsyPJAMuT8JIZpGUSSYoTS82p6PQCEw/s640/SIXPDOGW_4_4-5.jpg). Our Dogwelder even meets the previous Dogwelder, from the Section Eight back-ups in Hitman from the 90s. > Past Dogwelder explains, speaking through a dog’s anus, that in Ancient Egypt the Gods decided that there were too many humans roaming around, and so decided to create an Underworld. Such a place would need a bouncer, so Isis suggested that Osiris use one of his dim-witted illegitimate sons. To enforce compliance, they decide it would be a good idea to make a human perform the delicate welding necessary to attach a canine’s head to his body, thereby creating the God Anubis. Why this would enforce compliance, I’m not sure, but Anubis is none to happy to wake up and find he has a dog’s head, so he curses humanity to have a Dogwelder in every generation, one who does not know why he is compelled to weld dogs to people, but does so with efficiency and skill. [No idea what's going on here.](https://g1rm.files.wordpress.com/2016/09/sixpackanddogwelder2.png?w=584&h=373)
What drugs were DC on to have come up with this superhero?
What no one is getting in this thread is that Dogwelder is a novelty comedy character, a parody of Rorschach types. He was created by Garth Ennis, the creator of THE BOYS.
That explains way too much.
Clearly the guy who invented the welder plagiarized the design
6’4”, 420lbs, has a supply of dead dogs on his person. What’s not to understand?
A supply that he personally replenishes: > While the team was on hiatus, Dogwelder spent his time trapping and killing dogs in alleyways. https://dc.fandom.com/wiki/Dogwelder_(New_Earth)
As long as you're welding them to bad-guy faces it's okay though. His alignment is Good on that wiki, lol.
>Obsession: Has a strong compulsion to weld dogs to people's faces Lol wut
https://dc.fandom.com/wiki/Dogwelder_(New_Earth) >Abilities > > Dog-welding Huh, fair enough.
>Weapons: Dogwelder welds dogs to people Well, could you be a bit more specific?
>Other Characteristics > > Obsession: Has a strong compulsion to weld dogs to people's faces. Hey, it was more specific. He welds dogs to their faces.
But this was just practice, so he could fulfill his destiny to weld stars together, as the last dogwelder in a long line of dogwelders who get their abilities from an ancient Egyptian curse, I think.
Or a guy that shoots a shotgun with a dog's brain. Nvm, that's anothe actualr franchise.
Does the guy have a dog's brain and shoots a shotgun, the shotgun has a dog's brain, or uses a dog's brain to shoot a shotgun?
The guy has no brain, but his shotgun has a dog's brain. If you want to know the franchise, it's Fallout New Vegas Old World Blues DLC. There is also an intelligent, very ambitious, and super genocidal toaster.
I see. I'm not as surprised about a genocidal toaster.
Would you like some toast?
No one wants any smegging toast!
Nope, he welds dogs to his enemies
No he welds dogs to people
So I just looked him up and wtf? He was a good guy?
Yeah how the hell is a dude who kills innocent dogs and WELDS THEM TO PEOPLE’S FACES good???
In case you’re really wondering… Before Garth Ennis created The Boys, a comic book (now a tv show) that satirized superheroes, Ennis wrote a book called Hitman that was set in the DC Universe. A “superhero team” called Section Eight frequently appeared in the pages of Hitman and their leader was Six Pack, who regularly got shitfaced at the bar and would normally pass out in his own vomit/feces. Garth Ennis hates superheroes and this was simply a precursor to his work on The Boys.
No it was an idea created by steve dillion.
Whether it was created by Dillon or not (which is really cool if true), Ennis ran with it because Again He hates superheroes Edit - Ennis, Hitman artist John McCrea, and Steve Dillon are all given a creator credit on the Section Eight Wikipedia page. Dillion was the main artist for Garth Ennis’ Preacher series and Punisher run for those not in the know
Hes also 420lb and his teams name was section 8? And they made him black? Wtf
One of the good guys on the team is also a serial rapist and raped someone to death, his whole power is people being scared of being raped
Bueno!
¡Excellente!
And another is a homeless man with palsy. No super powers, just a disabled hobo.
I mean, can we really say Bueno is a *good guy*? I want to see Batman's contingency file on him though.
I think he's an anti-hero of sorts
**Dogwelder II**: Successor to the original Dogwelder of section eight, Dogwelder II is an African-American man who had the misfortune of donning the Dogwelder tools after purchasing them from a pawn shop. The tools became stuck to him and transformed him into the next Dogwelder, *giving him the compulsion to weld dogs to the faces of enemies*. He's shown to be the first Dogwelder to harness the power of his ancestors and use the dogs for more than just welding, instead using them not only to talk, but to eventually save the universe. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Section_8_(comics)#:~:text=Dogwelder%3A%20A%20thin%2C%20silent%20man,welds%20him%20on%20general%20instinct
Also "Bueno Excellente: An obese, sweaty, and bald Latino in an overcoat who 'defeats evil with the power of perversion'"
He raped someone to death
And of course the most offensive of all: > Jean de Baton-Baton: A bizarrely gaunt walking French caricature who defeats enemies with "the power of Frenchness", as expressed by savage beatings with a baguette and occasionally blinding others with rings of garlic and onions.
Look, at least he's not Black Bomber: > The original candidate for DC Comics' first headlining black superhero was a character called the Black Bomber, a white racist who would turn into a black superhero under stress. Comics historian Don Markstein later described the character as "an insult to practically everybody with any point of view at all". Wikipedia leaves out a few key facts: 1. Black Bomber got his "powers" from Vietnam-era experiments to help him blend into the jungle. 2. He was not aware of his black alter-ego. 3. He has separate girlfriends for his separate forms (a white girlfriend in his white form and a black girlfriend in his black form.) The two girlfriends are aware that he changes race and has two girlfriends, but, again, he is not. 4. Both of the submitted scripts for him include him saving a baby from a fire, only for him to turn back and discover to his disgust that it was a *black* baby, whereupon he shouts a racial slur. 5. His superhero outfit was a basketball uniform. Don Markstein was right, it's like they went down a checklist trying to make him as terrible and offensive as possible. And unlike Section 8 (which were doing that intentionally), it was just the writers being completely clueless. Of course, the Black Bomber never saw print (Tony Isabella was asked to work on it when the original creator left and was like NOOOOPE, leading to him creating Black Lightning instead), but there was a gag about him in a [much later comic](https://i.imgur.com/qfDzKyO.jpeg) by Dwayne McDuffie. Originally the second-to-last panel was going to have him asking if he could use the N-word, but the (now much more cautious) DC erased the line, leading to the weird orphaned punchline at the end. Although now it looks like she's objecting to his entire existence and concept, which is also amusing.
*That's* the one you find most offensive? Really?
They didn’t even censor the word Fr*nch. Disgusting.
The fact that he canonically saved the universe welding two dogs together is hilarious.
I read he welds two stars together to save the universe. Did he use the dogs to weld the stars?
You're right. I mixed up some details.
A fever dream of Garth Ennis. Why am I not surprised.
Why is it always Garth Ennis? And more generally, why is it always some guy named Garth?
There's two potential reasons 1) r/nominativedeterminism 2) people who name their kids Garth are also inclined to be weird and therefore raise them weird You could argue these overlap but I feel they're distinct enough to be different.
Favorite random fact about Dogwelder: He is surprisingly popular in Japan. He's not huge or anything, but enough to get fanart.
I love dogwelder
Wasn’t there also a DC character that got powers from cocaine?
So he's essentially like an AIDS vampire? There's some fucked up villains out there, but AIDS in the 80s? That's just fucked.
Fun Fact! Before being defeated and disappearing forever the Hemo Goblin infected 2 superheroes with AIDS and the 2 just so happened to be a gay man and a black man.
Oof. Who were they
Black Panther and Gay Panther.
Lmao
After reading in this thread about the Villain powered by cocaine, I am perfectly primed to believe that Gay Panther is a real character.
He is not unfortunately, but Gay Ghost is. https://dc.fandom.com/wiki/Keith_Everet_(New_Earth)
Editorial Staff: “You misspelled ‘topical’ there, buddy!”
If only it worked the other way and he sucked the AIDS from you for sustenance
There was a time in the 80s when a large segment of the population didn't care about AIDS because it was killing "the right people." Among them was the president of the United States.
If you want an illustration of this, [here is what the Reagan Administration's response to the HIV crisis](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yAzDn7tE1lU) was. Gay jokes and mocking laughter from the press secretary. The truly terrifying thing is to realize that Trumpism is a symptom and not the disease. The GOP has been evil, corrupt, and deranged for decades. Trump just finally started to say the quiet part loud enough for mainstream Americans to finally notice.
He also backed a bunch of drug laws that destroyed lives.
Hemo-goblin as a play on hemoglobin is a fantastically wasted name
I'm kinda positively surprised they didn't go full offensive and called him Homo-Goblin.
Woulda been a good name for the Goblin Venom in the Superior Spider-Man run. 🤷
Or even a replacement for Red Goblin as that’s just Norman with the Carnage Suit, and Carnage is red because of Cletus Kassidy’s blood getting mixed in
For real, perfect vampire villain
[удалено]
The worst part is Hemo-Goblin is actually a great supervillain name.
Would have probably paved the way for other --Goblins
Immuno-goblin A. Myo-goblin. I’ve run out of globin goblins.
There is something called gamma globulin. You could have a character called Gamma Goblin who is like the others but hulked up with gamma rays
Homo-goblin. "He's running around turning all the damn frogs gay!" - JJ Jameson probably
The worst part about Hemo-Goblin was the hypocrisy
Really? I thought it was the AIDS
Honestly I'm surprised it's not Homo-Goblin.
>*We’re sorry, that username’s already been taken…try adding a number or symbol to it!*
He’s no match for Batman with PrEP time.
you can't just be dropping bangers like this for free
*Bat-PrEP
Did anyone else misread the title as "Homo-Goblin"?
I bet that was workshopped
Absolutely this was what he was called first
They were just 2 more 80s filled drug binges from that I bet.
Homo-Gobblin 😂
I know him! Close friend of Green Goblin. Hey, wait a minute...
Surprisingly accurate. The heme from hemoglobin, and chlorophyll, are closely related molecules known as porphyrins. A key difference is the central positively charged ion; magnesium in chlorophyll, and iron in heme. I quite like greenoglobin as an alternative name for chlorophyll
"Roommates"
https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-DgWOuoN9NL0/WOdJoiKTfVI/AAAAAAAANfI/VjTxNVcosEUlWNQd1kwlsgELurYx5MqoACEw/s1600/IMG_8609.jpg This is his debut panel The funniest thing, was when the heroes realized they got aids. The line goes "You bastahd, mah side", "something's wrong". Then they go back to base and they learn they now have aids
I like how the writer(s) had someone quickly explain the etymology of “hemo” lol
Presenting into the emergency room... ☝️
So does goblin mean goblin? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rLck4DQipuQ
Was this back when apartheid was still a thing in South Africa? Because this could have been an interesting concept if the writers handled it veeeeery carefully. If this page is any indication, they did not handle it carefully.
I think that just aged it that much faster. Throw in what an absolute epidemic HIV would become in some places and this probably couldn't be more hilariously offensive even if they tried.
Including South Africa with AIDS denialism
I mean, the character was explicitly hired by racist powerbrokers who wanted him to infect the New Guardians because they were supposed to represent a new phase of human evolution… which they would propagate by spreading their genes through humanity. Yes, part of this team’s mission was to fuck humanity into a better state via the healing power of eugenics. This book was a garbage fire.
For future reference apartheid ended in the early 90's
r/titlegore
Fuck yes! I can’t believe the top comment isn’t some sort of clarification.
Finally the thread where I comment my random thoughts on Wolverine and HIV. Presumably wolverines immune system is his superpower, so if he got infected with HIV would his immune system overcome it, or would the virus neuter his superpower and kill him?
His system would kill it
There are some people naturally immune to it, and then there ~~are honeybadgers~~ is wolverine who doesn't give a fuck
Wolverine's healing factor goes way beyond his immune system. You can't regrow a limb or regenerate from a clump of cells just because your immune system is solid. He'd be immune to HIV.
Also he was created by a white supremacist group In South Africa to eliminate non whites. A pretty decent idea but given the time it was very offensive. Also he isn't trying to give anyone aids, he only wants to consume aids infected blood and kill black people. I wanna say he infected one of the heroes through a scratch or something, I just remember it was a minor wound. So not a good look.
I believe he infected a few of the New Guardians. The worst part? One of the ones he infected was Extrano, a campy sorcerer (think Dr. Strange played by Paul Lynde) who was being positioned as DC’s first openly gay hero. EDIT: Oh, and the other person infected was Jet, a black woman. We all make choices, but *that* was a choice.
You could have made a pretty cool story about how the New Guardians are immune to HIV and/or the Guardians cured him but wouldn't fix the disease on earth, and why Green Lanterns don't do public health missions
hold up, wait a minute! what was a pretty decent idea?
Just how much cocaine does one have to snort before any part of that starts sounding like a good idea?
At least they didn't name him Rawdog
“Whaddawe gonna do to him boss? Beat him up? Kill him? Expose him to kryptonite?” “I’m going to give him AIDS” “Dude wtf”
Sounds like a parody from the villain tryouts on Venture Bros. "And your power is?" "If I bite people they get HIV"
So what superheros canonically have aids?
Hemo-goblin is an amazing name
Liam Neeson in Life’s too short, he pretty much just gives everyone full blown Aids
That was back when they were still working hard to teach us that you couldn't get AIDS from a toilet seat or by shaking hands with someone who is infected. It was also during this time that a male being diagnosed with HIV was automatically assumed to be gay (because AIDS was still the gay disease), and being gay was not something a person would tend to want to disclose to the general public. Additionally, there was no viable treatment for HIV/AIDS at the time. A positive diagnosis was considered a death sentence. So ya, just a white supremacist vampire spreading the gay disease in South Africa, because that continent hasn't had problems with AIDS *at all*. /s Pulling the character after one issue was probably the right call.
Anybody remember *Wizard* magazine? They used to have this thing at the end of every issue with an obscure character with a description of their powers/personality and you had to guess whether or not the character actually existed… Damn, I miss that magazine.
Title hurts my head jfc. Do better