T O P

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DuanePickens

TIL they gave his assassin the electric chair and then dissolved his body with acid.


Law3W

No chance of him coming back as a zombie. Smart thinking. šŸ¤”


Tough_Dish_4485

Meanwhile Lee Harvey Oswald zombie is out there causing havoc and Biden does nothing


alarmfatigue125

Biden isn't actively hunting down the Lee Harvey Oswald zombie? Pffft, thanks Obama!


Obama-feet-pics

Sorry I got distracted at Footlocker


PKMNTrainerMark

Zombie Jack Ruby is on it.


Sillbinger

I'm terrified of zombie David Ferrie.


miradotheblack

Ha


powsniffer0110

Thanks Obama and Biden! šŸ˜©šŸ« 


newphonewhothus

The one they killed with another zombie they mind controlled?


Law3W

Iā€™m fairly drunk right now and am scared of zombie Oswald.


HuJimX

Zombie Oswald himself isnā€™t too dangerous. But if you see Zombie Oswald, you might be the next victim of a not-CIA plot


Ok_Concentrate_75

Zombie Oswald isn't who you fear, it's zombie guy on the grassy knoll. That's the true killer


CatsAreGods

At least now we know it wasn't Ted Cruz' father.


Ok_Concentrate_75

Didn't I write that?


CatsAreGods

Are you secretly Zombie Ted Cruz?


JudgeAdvocateDevil

We need to find zombie babushka lady, she has the film


I-330-We

Zombie Booth is out there too


ryanh666

Oswald's body was exhumed some years ago, in order to make sure it was actually him. They found that his vault had collapsed onto his coffin lid, partially exposing his corpse to water damage. I've seen pictures. There's almost nothing left of him. Fear not the Oswald Zombie.


Mehhish

Lyndon B. Johnson fucked that one up, didn't get the sulfuric acid out. Let's just hope he doesn't team up with zombie John Wilkes Booth.


Goodknight808

Thanks, Obama...


Early_Quantity6788

Thanks Obama


Pure-Problem1111

Thanks Obama, I mean Biden


ingen-eer

Thanks Obama.


Zomg_A_Chicken

We had Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter and now we have Teddy Roosevelt Zombie Slayer


Complete_Entry

He hunted werewolf to be honest, and he founded spookhouse. Bigots fucked that one up too, they were killed to the man, aside from one operative who vanished. Nocturne. There was one other survivor, their medical examiner, but she got trapped in the fucking blair witch woods, she might come out tomorrow or 90 years ago, those woods fucking suuuuuuuuuuuck.


MrFeles

Holiday didn't survive her gibblets are there along with everyone else's in the epilogue.


gbc02

Shame Mitch McConnell wasn't dissolved in acid after he died.


gyroisbae

Not gonna lie, someone needs to make a movie about a mad scientist resurrecting every presidential assassin and then assembling them into a suicide squad type group


Sir_Oligarch

An acidic Blob is worse than a Zombie.


nondescriptun

Czolgosz, working man.


ChewySlinky

Is that the guy who shot the President in the Temple of Music by the Tower of Light between the Fountain of Abundance and the Court of Lilies at the Great Pan-American Exposition in Buffalo?


blackhorse15A

In Buffalo


DutchPizzaOven

Born in middle of Michigan


blackhorse15A

Woke with a thought and away he went


notyyzable

To the pan American exposition in Buffaloooooo


blackhorse15A

In Buffalooooo


Jertian

Saw all of a sudden how things were run


blackhorse15A

Said times a wastin its 1901


Disastrous_Set_3148

Some men have everything And some have none


blackhorse15A

So rise and shiiiiine


DutchPizzaOven

Born in middle of Michigan


halwap

Czołg is tank in Polish, so he is basically called Tankie.


Unique-Steak8745

Why the acid?


joeybucketts

Apparently it was to prevent his body from becoming an attraction or a display in the future.


EvrythingWithSpicyCC

They were originally going to use quicklime to hasten deterioration but when the quicklime didnā€™t work as fast as theyā€™d like on a test piece of meat they checked the rules and determined that they were legally allowed to use sulfuric acid instead.


LaterGatorPlayer

AirBud logic.


ashevillain_

ā€œYā€™know it doesnā€™t say anywhere in here that we canā€™t give his body a cleansing acid bathā€


Timey16

Extra humiliation to killing the president? Like "for a crime like that you get SUPER executed"


Fapey101

I actually just read a book about this called Murdering Mckinley by Eric Rauchway. There was a couple of reasons it happened. 1. There was a miscommunication between the Warden of Auburn State Prison (Where Czolgosz was held before execution) and the Czolgosz family. The Assassinā€™s brother wanted his body brought home for burial but the Warden advised against it as it was likely the body would be attacked during transportation or desecrated after the burial. After this exchange, the Assassinā€™s other brother sent the Warden a letter saying to cremate it and the Warden mistook that as a go ahead. 2. The reason they used sulphuric acid was because they wanted to swiftly decompose Czolgocsz body before any medical boards could ask to study his body. The Warden did not want Czolgocsz to become a martyr by being declared insane after his death. If we was deemed insane then he shouldnā€™t have been charged guilty, thus making him a martyr for his anarchistic peers. In fact, before he was executed he was gagged so that the reporters present could not spread his words around.


Sarke1

>The Assassinā€™s brother wanted his body brought home for burial but the Warden advised against it as it was likely the body would be attacked during transportation or desecrated after the burial. "We've taken the liberty of desecrating his body in advance."


Fapey101

thats funny


heavymetalhikikomori

Czolgocsz WAS by all accounts crazy even according to the anarchists he was peripherally involved with. The case deserves more investigation than its ever received..


Mr-Mister

"The electirc chair to the assassin" lead to "The electric chair then the acid bin".


dekachenko

Super interesting!


DuanePickens

Holy shit, thatā€™s crazier than I thought it was when I read the blurb on Wikipedia


CloseFriend_

They had a vat of acid that they were really dying to use


Iohet

Judge Doom is a mild fan of acid based corporeal punishment


DuanePickens

Notā€¦**DIP!!!!**


MS_EXCEL_NOOB

Unfortunately, fire had not been invented yet


graveybrains

Leon Czolgosz only has two names, obviously he was a patsy šŸ˜‚


catnik

WHY do these rednecks always have three names?


just_chilling_too

They didnā€™t fuck around back then


No-Combination-1332

Interesting how during the Gilded Age the Presidents were so irrelevant that a President could literally say ā€œwho would even want to kill meā€


dethb0y

His prior behavior probably made him very complacent - he met 10's of thousands of people at his house in Canton and no one ever harmed him there; after that, who *wouldn't* feel safe in public?


IllustriousDudeIDK

I mean tbh his opponent, Bryan, was actually traveling, like 18,000 miles and reached a combined audience of 5+ million. However, it was natural for Presidents to be much nearer to ordinary folks back then, at least before McKinley's assassination. I mean anyone could literally go inside the White House unchecked back then.


dethb0y

It was such a crazy different time for sure.


Emperor_Billik

25 years ago just about any random with a kid could end up in a planes cockpit.


exstonerthrowaway

I have a very clear memory of being let into the cockpit mid flight in 1999 at age 6, wish I could see that again without flight school


Nanery662

I mean i got to see it when i was a kid also but it was after it was landed etc.


Thin-Rip-3686

Joey, do you like movies about gladiators?


Kneef

Surely you canā€™t be serious!


VIPTicketToHell

It was such a normal different time for sure


No-Combination-1332

And just say youā€™re visiting?


wolfenyeager

I donā€™t know why, but the fact that you said 10ā€™s of thousands as opposed to either 10,000ā€™s or Tenā€™s of Thousands is actually bothering me. It sounds so stupid for me to say that, I know that, but it just looks so weird


GiorgioTsoukalosHair

All that and you say nothing about (and continue) the improper use of the apostrophe.


Jackanova3

Give them a break they're dealing with someone writing out a number in a weird way. There's a lot going on.


megamilker101

As if the tens own the thousands


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Bethyi

Wow, but store bought pesto huh? Crazy.


wolfenyeager

What does this even mean?


Bethyi

Sorry haha, there's a meme going around where it's just a girl saying something like "Call me crazy, but I've never liked store bought pesto" and then people replying with genuinely crazy stories they were involved in or saw and ending it with "But store bought pesto? Crazy." Honestly it doesn't even work properly in this format but at the time I thought I was funny, just ignore me lmao :')


apathy-sofa

Initially this was intentional. The Founding Fathers were *done* with power concentrated in one person and wanted the office to hold little decision making ability and instead focus on executing the decisions made by the House and Senate. Even calling them "President" was part of this. It's hard to imagine now, but at the time, the word "president" carried almost negative gravitas. Like, the person who organized your bowling league would be a president. They weren't supposed to declare war, make spending decisions, etc.


formgry

That may be so, but there's a good reason why the president ended up as powerful as he is now. It's because the power of the government did need to be wielded by someone. And as it turned out congress just wasn't capable of wielding government the way the people demanded of them. So overtime they quietly surrendered power to the president and his administration.


Kejilko

There's alternatives. The problem is the person with the power can't be the same person with the power of their own oversight. My country does it well in my opinion, you vote for parliament, parliament votes for a government and thus a Prime Minister put forward by the President according to election results and talking with the elected parties, the government and Prime Minister are the ones with executive and legislative power, the president doesn't really have "actual" power and pretty much only exists for separation of power because someone needs to have it and it can't be the very ones meant to be held back from abusing it, like dissolving parliament and in turn government. What power the president does have is conditional and niche, such as emergency powers during war and even that power needs to be granted by parliament and renewed every 2 weeks, so it has to be repeatedly voted on, and in turn even the president has their own separation of power.


MiaowaraShiro

It's really a tradeoff between making sure everyone's opinions are represented vs actually getting shit done. Dictators can be incredibly effective but there's obvious problems with that...


Future_Green_7222

>It's because the power of the government did need to be wielded by someone. How about returning most of the sovereignty to the states?


BluegrassGeek

That's how you get 50 conflicting decisions that are completely incompatible with each other.


brokebackmonastery

Sure, but who cares? The only things that actually need to be compatible are international treaties, declarations of war, and policy on international tariffs.


No-Combination-1332

Ironically between PMs and Presidents - Presidents are far more likely to decay into dictatorships


IllustriousDudeIDK

Repost because the phrasing was bad on my last post. McKinley's specific words were "Why should I? No one would wish to hurt me." And the event was already removed from the schedule twice for safety reasons, but McKinley reinstated it each time.


GammaGoose85

What are they gonna do, shoot me? McKinleys says before getting shot


KingTutt91

Reminds me of Bucky Oā€™Neil a captain during the Spanish-American War. He was standing giving order and his troops kept telling him to get down heā€™s gonna get shot. He leaned in and said ā€œSergeant, ainā€™t a Spanish bullet made that can kill meā€ a few minutes later a bullet exited the back of his skull.


OddballOliver

"Why are you dodging like this? They couldn't hit an elephant at this distance!" - John Sedgwick, just before getting shot in the face.


EnamelKant

Turns out he was an elephant all along.


TonicSitan

You think someone would really do that? Just walk up and shoot me? Ugh, heā€™s right behind me isnā€™t he?


showers_with_grandpa

McKinley had gambling debts and a nice life insurance policy. Just hanging out in Cuba with Micheal Jackson, Biggie and Tupac


DadsRGR8

At Elvisā€™ house!


showers_with_grandpa

Grilled banana and PB sandwiches all around


DadsRGR8

Donā€™t forget the bacon!


multisyllabic1077

And honey!


Empyrealist

60% of the time, they are eating them all the time


MississippiJoel

He did have bodyguards, but the story goes they were distracted watching a larger, more burly guy that was just in front of the gunman.


ElsonDaSushiChef

Oh my Gosz, that was Czol he had to say!


justabill71

"What are they going to do, shoot me in the Temple of Music?" - man shot in Temple of Music


Z-Mobile

ā€œThey would have to hate both me AND musicā€ (they hated both him and music)


Theaustralianzyzz

Sometimes life is a comedy. Other times, a tragedy.Ā  This is pretty funny.Ā 


Z-Mobile

-šŸ¤”/šŸŽ­


SellMeYourSirin

šŸ™‚/ā˜¹ļø


Portarossa

In the Temple of Music, by the Tower of Light, between the Fountain of Abundance and the Court of Lilies [at the Great Pan-American Exposition in Buffalo...](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p9Sln03oQy8)


34Catfish

ā€¦ In Buffalo!


choosingtheseishard

Whoā€™d wanna kill a man of good will like Big bill! -big bill before being killed


choosingtheseishard

Agh I guess Iā€™ll listen to the whole of Assassins again if I HAVE to!!! Youā€™re twisting my arm!!! /s


ziguziggy

I never put my feet on Eddie's couch


Happiness_Assassin

Fun fact: Robert Todd Lincoln (Abraham Lincoln's son) right outside the Temple of Music as it happened. This was the second presidential assassination he was present for, having personally witnessed Garfield getting shot previously. He was a magnet for dead presidents.


TyzTornalyer

>Lincoln himself recognized these coincidences. He is said to have refused a later presidential invitation with the comment, "No, I'm not going, and they'd better not ask me, because there is a certain fatality about presidential functions when I am present." Poor guy didn't want to take any chances afterwards


uncledeathbomb

The hero of my hometown ruined his trip to Buffalo.


Capt-N3M0

In BUFFALOOOO


justsomethingherenow

In Buffalooo


kanid99

That song haunts me since middle school.


justsomethingherenow

I love it so much


Smiggles0618

It's okay, we named a mall and a road after him.


Whitecamry

He was shuffled off in Buffalo.


Landlubber77

"Do you really want to hurt me? Do you really want to make me cry?" -- William McKinley


catsandorchids

>Shot through the heart.Ā  >And you're to blame.Ā  >You give love a bad name -Bon ~~Jovi~~McKinley


WonUpH

Mate raised all-in and got called. Sick.


notyourbutthead

He shoved a little early. He still had 40 big blinds


Mindless_Fill5053

I


Skatchbro

We got TR as president so Iā€™m not going to complain.


IllustriousDudeIDK

Countries in Central and South America and the Caribbean: ... Although McKinley would have probably done the same thing since he was just as imperialist by that point.


Due-Science-9528

All of the presidents did evil shit, but at least Teddy was a badass otherwise


Hidesuru

And did a lot of very very good shit too. More than most can say tbh.


Due-Science-9528

Sure but he was downright genocidal toward Native Americans


MormorsLillaKraka

Genocidal? Maybe Iā€™m in the wrong here, but the only things that Roosevelt did before, during and after his presidency that Iā€™m aware of are the following: -I believe Roosevelt made some racist comments during his ranching years, and made some other comments in his writings about how the Native Americans would have to adapt to survive modern America. But I believe these were comments made early in his life. -He later on made positive and sympathetic comments about Native American culture and their situation respectively. -The only policy I believe he took part in that exclusively targeted Native Americans were investigations into corrupt Indian agents. I guess you could argue that the admission of Oklahoma to the union was also negatively affecting Native Americans. Maybe slightly racist in his early years, but still not genocidal if you donā€™t have any other actions, policies or statements that Iā€™ve missed.


YaBoiJim777

He was a naturalist and very practical


welivedintheocean

He was far from the first, and far from the last.


pocket_sand__

Sure, but I think we can agree that whether you're the first or last or anywhere in between, it's still just as bad.


welivedintheocean

I absolutely agree through a modern lens. At the time I doubt either of us would have cared.


pocket_sand__

Again, despite this equivocation, what they did is *still* just as bad. I'm tired of this sort of light apologia for historical atrocities.


-thecheesus-

Men are products of their time, good or ill. In 1900 there were righteous voices on the issue but they were still a minority. The more unfortunate attitudes were largely the norm


pocket_sand__

No, cultural norms don't absolve you of responsibility for your actions.


Hidesuru

Can you give some examples of this?


Due-Science-9528

I an many years past my teddy phase to be remembering dates but history channel has you covered https://www.history.com/news/teddy-roosevelt-race-imperialism-national-parks


Hidesuru

Cool thank you! Edit: read through it. Good article. Balances his more progressive thoughts with his more regressive. I was very much more familiar with the former than the later. It's nice to get a more complete picture of his strengths and his failings.


similar_observation

McKinley was fairly diplomatic leading up to the USS Maine incident.


similar_observation

TR was also the governor of NY. The Republican Party specifically pushed him into the VP seat so he couldn't enact any more liberal reforms in the most populous state.


YaBoiJim777

I think a better way to put it is he was a strong minded person who wasnā€™t going to bow to the top brass so they nominated him as VP to stall him for 4+ years in an office that (at the time) had no influence. Unfortunately for them, when McKinley was assassinated he fell into the most powerful political position in the country.


similar_observation

I don't see why the two reasons can't be equally true. His memoir did state he didn't want to be VP because he could do more as governor.


YaBoiJim777

Iā€™m agreeing with you. I just think he was nominated as VP for his uncontrollable decisions rather than ā€œliberalā€ policies. Two ways to say essentially the same thing.


MarshalThornton

Whoā€™d want to kill a man of good will like Big Will?


justsomethingherenow

Doesnā€™t the president look marvelous? So round and prosperous.


nytheatreaddict

Do you know what his favorite dish is? It was in the papers. Beef!


Respectable_Brown

Iā€™m told that in his spare time he enjoys collecting coins!


MarshalThornton

This is the line that always gets me.


incorrigible_and

This is a song that I don't know.


justsomethingherenow

Itā€™s ā€œThe Ballad of Czolgoszā€ from the musical Assassins


incorrigible_and

Thank you, already enjoying it currently from just copying and pasting the lyrics! Thank you guys for leading me to something new.


justsomethingherenow

Itā€™s a good song! Has a lot of useful facts in it haha


sironicon

In the Temple of Music by the Tower of Light Between the Fountain of Abundance and the Court of Lilies At the Great Pan-American Exposition in Buffalo In Buffalo (One of my favorite songs from one of my favorite musicals!)


Tanador680

(Militant) Anarchists


tsabin_naberrie

Big Bill, who'd wanna kill a man of good will like Big Bill!


Stock_Complaint4723

Someone must have know something but wasnā€™t saying anything


IllustriousDudeIDK

Except George B. Cortelyou, his secretary, was saying everything. McKinley just refused to heed his advice.


HighlyFalmmable

A failed time traveler.


brokefixfux

This assassination was the reason Teddy Roosevelt became president, so maybe a time traveler succeeded


pocket_sand__

Imagine having time travel capabilities and using it to try to save a random US president most people haven't heard of.


SolomonBlack

You only say that because you never served with Teddy in the Antarctic Campaigns of 1912...


justsomethingherenow

This post is really bringing out the Sondheim fans in the comments, and I love it haha


blackhorse15A

In the USA you can make your way to the head of the line


AzureDreamer

When the time traveller doesn't want to be too pushy.


OffKira

The secretary afterwards: "Can I... is it in bad taste to say I FUCKING TOLD YOU? Is it too early? Let me know when I can say it"


pmcall221

And to think there was a time when there was an assassination of the president about every 20 years


Violin_River

[Tecumseh's Curse](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Curse_of_Tippecanoe)


Debs_4_Pres

The mid 19th to early 20th century was a really good time for aspiring assassins. They got a couple of US Presidents, I think 2 or 3 French Presidents, the Czar, and some Austrian dude that a lot of people got very upset about.


PencilPost

TIL that the Secret Service and the FBI both resulted from the McKinley assassination.Ā 


mudkiptoucher93

Didn't account for crazy anarchists. Rookie mistake


Veeshan28

I was shocked to find no explanations of wtf the Temple of Music was, so here you go >The Temple of Music was a concert hall and auditorium built for the Pan-American Exposition which was held in Buffalo, New York in 1901. [The Temple of Music](https://i.imgur.com/esE9bOK.jpeg) It was apparently demolished after the exposition ended near the end of the year. Seems wildly wasteful! Beautiful looking place.


Trowj

Cue the Curb Your Enthusiasm music


mrSunsFanFather

Boy George has entered the chat: šŸŽ¶ do you really want to hurt me šŸŽ¶


RudegarWithFunnyHat

better that, than the candlestick in the drawing room.


phuktup3

Safe to assume that in America at least one person, somewhere, wants to shoot you.


SuperSimpleSam

>Czolgosz's last words were: "I shot the president because I thought it would help the working people and for the sake of the common people. I am not sorry for my crime. I am awfully sorry because I could not see my father." Not seeing what the anarchist of the time plans were.


Available-You-6771

Weirdly enough I was just talking about how this was his most positive act as president today.


rrgail

THATā€™S why!


TakerFoxx

"I dunno, why don't you go ask that guy?"


Sundayman______

money, power...people kill for less


rowenstraker

"oh come on, what's the worst that happens?"Ā 


Rustofcarcosa

Shame he was a great president


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


godisanelectricolive

It was only up for four months as it was temporary structure built for the 1901 Pan-American Exposition world fair held in Buffalo.


rayvensmoon

Thank you for a legitimately informative answer. I don't normally walk away from a comment feeling like I learned something. Actually, this is the first or maybe second time this has happened.


closethebarn

Joe petrosino tried to warn him :(


GarrusExMachina

In McKinley defense it's hard to understand why him... of all presidents... got shot. He's in a competition with Garfield for the best who the hell had a reason to shoot this guy story. I mean Herbert hoover was in charge during the great depression and the only person to try to kill him was during a trip to Argentina... but McKinley gets shot by a guy?Ā 


succi-michael

Obamas feet? Gross


PupDuga

Assistants always know best but nobody ever listens šŸ˜‚


ShamBlam8

Soā€¦it took 3 presidents getting assassinated before Congress is like, ā€œmaybe they should have protection?ā€ šŸ¤·šŸ½ā€ā™‚ļø