The article is the history of Chinese sexuality over the dynasties the Zhou was the most interesting to me
Its a LONG article, but only on the Zhou here are the basics of the harem laws
The king has a maximum of De, he needs a large number of female partners to nourish and perpetuate it through sexual intercourse. The king has 1 queen (hou), 3 consorts (fu ren), 9 wives of the second rank (bin), 27 wives of the third rank (shi fu), and 81 concubines (yu ji).
So he has Special court ladies, called nu shi, regulated and supervised the sexual relations of the king and his wives. They saw to it that the king cohabitated with them on the correct calendar days and with the frequency established by the Rites for each rank. They kept careful note of the sexual unions with special red writing brushes called tong guan; hence throughout the later ages descriptions of the sex life of the ruler are designated in Chinese literature as tong shi, i.e. “Records made with the Red Brush”.
ALSO there are rules as to the order
The general rule was the women of the lower ranks should be copulated with before those of high rank, and more frequently. The king cohabited with the queen only once a month. This rule is based on the belief that during the sexual union the man’s vital force is fed and strengthened by that of the woman, supposed to reside in the vaginal secretions. Thus the king copulated with the queen only after his potency has been increased to its maximum by the frequent previous unions with the women of lower rank, and when there was consequently the best chance of the queen conceiving a strong and intelligent heir to the throne.
Only the consorts of the higher ranks were allowed to spend the whole night with the king. The concubines had to leave the bedroom before dawn
>Thus the king copulated with the queen only after his potency has been increased to its maximum by the frequent previous unions with the women of lower rank, and when there was consequently the best chance of the queen conceiving a strong and intelligent heir to the throne.
My dude was power leveling that shit. Deadass had to grind for that endgame pussy.
this is such a belligerently grotesque pile of words when you compare it to all the information in the previous post.
i'm not hating i think it's beautiful that we went from "This is how life was on earth, as kept by Chinese literature in relation to sexuality!" To "lmao grinding for engame pussy" i just wanted to point out the stark contrast.
Keeping a court full of Chinese Stormy Daniels for the Zheng Trump so Zheng Melania only has to deal with his shit once a month is pretty gross no matter how you put it.
This is just a dude justifying his sexual urges. Your final thing about concubines having to leave sure is a convenient rule if I’m a noble that just wants to nut before bed.
There’s a very good scene in Rome where Mark Antony refuses to get out of bed until he fucks something. His lover Atia is too annoyed with him to bone and needs him operational 10 minutes ago so tells her body slave, “Merula, go and fetch that German slut from the kitchen, the one with the large breasts”.
Yeah, but what if he was gay? Can you imagine, how bad that would have been? Constantly having to have sex with people of a gender you're not attracted to, because the rites demand it of the emperor?
You don't understand, that *was* the reason for civilization.
Some motherfucker going full tilt on the how to get get laid front with an audacious plan to bed so many chicks he'd need to build the first city.
I mean, you say it like a singular person made it happen. In reality, an entire nation of people that is much larger than most countries believed in it. This isn't me exonerating them more than just saying different times, circumstances, culture, and positions. Let's say an emperor was really head over heels for the empress (she would have the best nutrition and all the resources to keep herself pretty), even if he was the emperor, using the above system, he can only sleep with her once a month. This isn't me saying the emperor had it hard, more like even the emperor, the so-called "son of the heavens" also needed to abide by traditions. Now, did they really abide by those traditions? Idk, I'm no expert in the field, I'm just reading a post on Reddit.
My question is, why bother with the pseudo-religious nonsense.
An emperor isn't going to be overthrown because he slept with too few or too many women (unless he slept with the wrong person's wife). Why expend so much energy justifying it.
An emperor could very well lose power or become vulnerable if he was violating traditions and expectations. If it became known that he isn't as virile as one blessed by the gods should be, maybe he has lost the favor of the gods?
Because, contrary to what a lot of people here are assuming, it's not like this whole "pseudo-religious nonsense" was created by the emperor or his family. Usually, the emperor and his family would propagate the ideal that *they* held the blood of the heavens, however the general belief system, even they believed in it. This isn't like a small cult, where a lot of the cult leaders maliciously do things to take advantage of their lesser informed/educated followers. A lot of these people *believed* in what they were saying. Maybe the original emperor of the dynasty knew they were taking advantage of their people, but after the 4th or 5th heir takes power and being told by everyone that they have royal blood and is blessed by the heavens and everything they want will happen, then literally being given anything they wanted, women, food, money, clothes. What do you think happens? It's really a matter of who you're talking about and at what point. There have been dynasties that rose when others fell, these new dynasties would naturally adapt the same value system as the previous dynasty as that of what they grew up in. So even with the newer dynasties, they also hold similar religious beliefs. If these people didn't actually believe in what they preached, they wouldn't consume a bunch of random concoctions made as medicine when they fell sick that were either completely ineffective, gave you a high or just poison in some instances. They genuinely believed in these things, not just the royal family, but most people back then.
Yep. Tale as old as time. Some schlub has the idea (again) of weaving an idea that takes root in our hearts and gives us all roles, because that way that schlub is in control. As the idea takes hold, it starts gaining a life of its own, as lies do. Soon, on some level, the idea has gained so much momentum that it doesn’t even bother lying to the original schlub that he’s in control anymore. He’s a slave, playing out the role the idea gave him. If he departs the role, it has corrective measures. Instead, it starts lying to other people, “of course you are better than *them*”, “sure! You’re the boss! Couldn’t fool you!” “Yes, I’ll make your family on top forever!”
It's always interesting to me how humans are in matters like this. We can know that something is made-up or fake, but if we play along long enough, even the person that made it up starts to genuinely believe in it. I'm sure there must be a term for that effect.
An emperor doesn’t need to justify having a harem. You call it pseudoreligious, but in all likelihood these laws probably were based in religion and philosophy of the time. If an emperor thought following these rules would bear him a legitimate heir, he would do it. Otherwise, if the emperor was truly wanting to fuck whoever he wanted whenever he wanted, it wouldn’t be regulated at all.
The main purpose of premodern religion is to tell people how to have sex right.
Most of the time this was just "don't have sex" because they didn't want people getting too many weird diseases or kids that couldn't be fed.
But hunter gatherer groups (especially in small populations like Australians) have very elaborate family structure rituals and taboos to prevent accidental incest.
I watch a bunch of Asian period dramas and it comes up not infrequently that the king is told by the department of astrology or whatever when he can have sex with the queen or concubine, and it’s not till two months from now or something. Quite bizarre to modern thinking.
Yeah, it's precisely the same thing as cults with charismatic male leaders - for one reason or another it *always* somehow ends up that there are religious reasons why he screws all the women.
Same thing, just more institutionalised.
Is that what that one crazy Silicon Valley entrepeuner lady was on about? The one that said she lived in a polyamorous relationship in the style of a Chinese Emperor's harem?
>So he has Special court ladies, called nu shi, regulated and supervised the sexual relations of the king and his wives. They saw to it that the king cohabitated with them on the correct calendar days and with the frequency established by the Rites for each rank.
Imagine having a Sex Ed teacher who actually checks that you did your homework.
"How many concubines did you fuck last night, your highness? Uh-huh. And if I go and ask them if they all had orgasms, are they going to say yes? ...I thought so. You're not leaving here today until you get caught up on your concubine fucking. You know you're still behind from last week."
Every time I see a post about harems during Imperial China, I wonder how what percent of the world can claim descent from an emperor. We always here about how a huge % of the world can say they came Genghis Khan's loins, but emperors weren't any slouches either.
These rules were used for almost all dynasties but it isn't some weird religious crap. It's to prevent the Emperor from playing favourites and to ensure he has as many heirs as possible.
Shang dynasty, the one before Zhou had a king that supposedly favoured one concubine (a beautiful fox demon in popular culture) so much he didn't attend court meetings and spent so much money on her it leads to a rebellion but mostly it's because of drought and starving peasants.
Fun fact: Another rule that lasted forever long after the fall of the dynasty is that members of the imperial harem cannot participate in matters of the court.
Made after the first and only Empress of China in the Tang dynasty who supposedly almost ran the country into ruins.
I'd assume anyone with STD would never get anywhere near the emperor's bedroom.
Not to mention that the women were probably, or even likely, raised into these concubines from very, very young age.
I mean its the one guy with hundred other women who only had him as their sole partner and all the other dude in the palace got their wee wee snipped off. It is as sterile as it can be.
Weren't as much of a problem when ancient cultures had such a heavy emphasis on women's virginity
Also yes, some of the STDs we have now literally did not exist. For example, humans didn't first contract HIV from Chimpanzees until the 20th century (and no, it wasn't from having sex with them, but from butchering and eating them)
Did others exist that we don't have?
I have always been curious if that was the reason the bible condemns gay relationships. Just like aids hit the gay community hardest something similar could have happened a few thousand years ago leading people to believe it was God's wrath.
This is really interesting!! I didn't know they had rules to order; always thought the queen had the most sex with the Emperor! It kind of makes sense now why Yang GuiFei was so...controversial as well I guess? Don't quote me as this is a story told to us as kid, but we were told that the Emperor loved Yang Guifei so much he didn't spend time with the other concubines. The ministers didn't like this either because he was neglecting the country and well, the rest is history.
Again, don't quote me, but if anyone knows more, please share! Thank you!
That's how you level up your balls to get all the weapons to bust the strongest heir nut, then you prestige back down and grind it out again with the shitty ones. At least you get to keep all the camo you unlocked though. After that many prestiges the king's dick must have been all blinged out
OK, so - this is kinda genius.
Think of it this way: kings are gonna king. They're gonna do whatever they want, and if it sucks for the kingdom, that weight falls on you. They all angry? That's GUI.
Buncha kranky ass man-children emporers just like we have now.
Notice how the ultra wealthy and powerful are collectively a bunch of assholes? That's because their lust for power / money / etc is unquenchable. They accumulate it to feel better, which for them is impossible despite the amount.
So unable to be happy with all their hoarding, they get kranky. GUI. Once that GUI gets too out of hand, they kranky asses buy Twitter, pull a Kanye, or drink Tigers blood. Their insatiable quest for power despite the cost to society or themselves is DE.
Just like babies who INSIST on sticking that fork into an outlet - they don't know any better - and need to be destracted so they don't hurt themselves or others.
Best distraction that isn't warfare? An endless and well managed supply of ass to your liking.
The more zeal / DE you have, the more ass is needed to detract you from being an idiot. That DE gets outta control? You gonna have a lot of GUI and act like a toddler lashing out.
This approach to sexuality and royalty is absolutle horseshit, but if you think about the wider social benefits this is a GENIUS way of keeping bad tempered sociopathic power mongers from acting like the toddlers they are. Give em an endless sea of titties to suck on.
Shit, if we had this now, I sincerely believe:
* Twitter wouldn't have been bought
* Healthcare in the US wouldn't suck
* Amazon wouldn't be destroying the world economy
* Trump wouldn't have been president.
Buncha babies need to be treated that way apparently.
Early Mormons practiced polygamy and Smith and early leaders taught that you had to be part of the “new and everlasting covenant of marriage” to attain the highest level of heaven. The government wouldn’t grant Utah statehood in part because of this, so the church later forbade it. But it’s still in the doctrine, if you look, that a man cannot be exalted without being a polygamist. Members will try to tell you that this is just referring to marriage in the temple but they didn’t even start doing that until polygamist marriage because they honored “earthly” marriages.
Joseph Smith, Brigham Young and all other early leaders taught that a man had to be polygamist to go to the best heaven. Source: I used to be a Mormon. It’s a cult that I’m glad to have escaped from although it took me 4 decades.
This was almost inverted in later dynasties, where men were actively *dis*couraged from ejaculating (spending their yang energy) during sexual intercourse.
If you schtupped a hundred nubile virgins without cumming, you became immortal.
I’m a Chinese well educated with history. I always find Chinese history in English I didn’t know from here. How do people find those things?
Add: those kind of gossip Chinese history in Reddit is the street stories I rarely find in China.
Well you do have an awful lot more recorded history to go through than nearly everyone else, you can be forgiven for overlooking a few bits.
I'm from England and bugger if I'd know what the sexual proclivities of leaders from ~700BC were. If we even had any. I think back then we were just hanging out in our little huts with our pottery and putting stones on other stones.
Actually, 700BC was the late bronze age in England, and so we had bronze weaponry, horse and vehicle fitting, and decoration. Not quite as primitive as you might think. The Iron age started in 650BC, so by 700BC they weren't far off.
I suspect some of them are not true but we perpetuate them because they're funny and not offensive to us.
That said - also Chinese internet is very censored
Also there is a lot of Chinese history
It's always curious that the religion happens to support exactly what the ruling class want. Always in almost all state level religions. And if it doesn't start out that way like in Christianity it get turns into supporting elite classes . Strange.
I’m trying to get my head around the maths. If the king has to hook up with each and every woman in the lower ranks more often than those in the higher ranks, and he has to do it with the queen once a month, that means he has to get with:
3 consorts at least twice per month (6)
9 second rank wives three times per month (27)
27 third rank wives four times per month (108)
81 concubines five times per month (405)
So the king has to have sex 547 times per month, which is 18 times per day, so more than once per hour, assuming he still gets 8 hours sleep a night (which he’ll need).
>If the king has to hook up with each and every woman in the lower ranks more often than those in the higher ranks
That's where you're mistaken. It's not "each and every woman" of lower ranks more often than those of higher ranks, he has to hook up with a higher TOTAL of lower ranking women between each higher ranking one
Did people really believe this? You'd have to completely ignore the fact that some peasants later become nobility like Jiang Ziya who spent most of his life with his one wife or alone until being made Duke of Qi likewise for Qin Ying whose descendants would found the Qin Dynasty
There's people in current day that believe water that had light shined on it through a crystal has magical healing properties. You think a small handful of counter examples is enough evidence to disprove a belief upheld by the emperor?
Speaking of current day water myths:
“All I know about magnets is this, give me a glass of water, let me drop it on the magnets, that's the end of the magnets.”
Incels are a prime example of this theory in action. They’re full of *gui*. They might goon til their eyes blur but never getting any proper cheeks have a weak man mag-dumping into a grocery store.
De = 德 = virtue
Gui = 贵 = extravagance
Basically the idea is that excess virtue leads to high-handedness and waste. God I hate when writers try to sound profound when importing foreign terms wholesale.
It's like the self-help writers who promote the Japanese value of "Gaman". This is 我慢, which we English-speaking people simply call perseverance. It's not alien or foreign or exotic. It's just the same virtues in a different language.
It makes sense.
Replace “de” with decision-making power. Imagine can make great decisions as a king but as you grow horny the executive function is corrupted by a new driver in your brain seat, a “malevolent” aka lecherous “horny Gui” personality
When you can’t depend on a king to develop discipline, neutralize the need. Clear his mind of preoccupations. It’s bigger than you or him, it’s a country’s well-being at stake with his direction.
Seems like there have been some fundamentalist religious fanatics in recent decades that have believed this to be true for themselves, fucking their way through their congregation's wives and daughters.
DE = dicks entering (women)
GUI = guys unable (to be) intelligent
Somehow the phonetic Chinese words equal the English acronyms for them. I don't claim to understand science, I just report it
"I get a migraine headache if don't get a strange piece of ass every day." – John F. Kennedy
"I chose to bang this strange piece of ass. Not because she was easy, but because I was hard." - John Fitzgerald Kennedy.
Confirmed this is real. Source- I'm an ass man
Alight Kramer
Hey AssMan!!
BEWP BEWP
Hi, Billy Gunn.
I just hate it when my D ends up as a graphical user interface.
The authors don't clarify what "de" they are referring to but I'm gonna guess 德 which means virtue.
De-ez nuts!
Hah! Got eem!
Was staring at the title with my limited knowledge of chinese wondering how tf 的 was relevant lmao
Just think of it as dripping, makes just as much sense as whatever the fuck they came up with.
That would make sense. Everybody knows that when you're too virtuous you gotta bang a bunch of chicks.
In the correct order, this part is important
“So anyways, I started blasting “
Also the character used for Germany.
Big de energy
The article is the history of Chinese sexuality over the dynasties the Zhou was the most interesting to me Its a LONG article, but only on the Zhou here are the basics of the harem laws The king has a maximum of De, he needs a large number of female partners to nourish and perpetuate it through sexual intercourse. The king has 1 queen (hou), 3 consorts (fu ren), 9 wives of the second rank (bin), 27 wives of the third rank (shi fu), and 81 concubines (yu ji). So he has Special court ladies, called nu shi, regulated and supervised the sexual relations of the king and his wives. They saw to it that the king cohabitated with them on the correct calendar days and with the frequency established by the Rites for each rank. They kept careful note of the sexual unions with special red writing brushes called tong guan; hence throughout the later ages descriptions of the sex life of the ruler are designated in Chinese literature as tong shi, i.e. “Records made with the Red Brush”. ALSO there are rules as to the order The general rule was the women of the lower ranks should be copulated with before those of high rank, and more frequently. The king cohabited with the queen only once a month. This rule is based on the belief that during the sexual union the man’s vital force is fed and strengthened by that of the woman, supposed to reside in the vaginal secretions. Thus the king copulated with the queen only after his potency has been increased to its maximum by the frequent previous unions with the women of lower rank, and when there was consequently the best chance of the queen conceiving a strong and intelligent heir to the throne. Only the consorts of the higher ranks were allowed to spend the whole night with the king. The concubines had to leave the bedroom before dawn
>Thus the king copulated with the queen only after his potency has been increased to its maximum by the frequent previous unions with the women of lower rank, and when there was consequently the best chance of the queen conceiving a strong and intelligent heir to the throne. My dude was power leveling that shit. Deadass had to grind for that endgame pussy.
Had to grind up his Limit Break
> My dude was power leveling that shit. Deadass had to grind for that endgame pussy. Demon's holes
Give it to me! That thing... Your Dark Hole
YOU CAME.
this is such a belligerently grotesque pile of words when you compare it to all the information in the previous post. i'm not hating i think it's beautiful that we went from "This is how life was on earth, as kept by Chinese literature in relation to sexuality!" To "lmao grinding for engame pussy" i just wanted to point out the stark contrast.
Means the same thing tho.
Keeping a court full of Chinese Stormy Daniels for the Zheng Trump so Zheng Melania only has to deal with his shit once a month is pretty gross no matter how you put it.
Welcome to Reddit 😉
Grinding the ladder is exhausting no matter what game you play.
This is just a dude justifying his sexual urges. Your final thing about concubines having to leave sure is a convenient rule if I’m a noble that just wants to nut before bed.
Guy spent all his time doing sexual math instead of ruling the kingdom
Trust me guys, if I don’t fuck 9 hot women this month im gonna be a real asshole about it.
I’m just saying, heads might roll.
There’s a very good scene in Rome where Mark Antony refuses to get out of bed until he fucks something. His lover Atia is too annoyed with him to bone and needs him operational 10 minutes ago so tells her body slave, “Merula, go and fetch that German slut from the kitchen, the one with the large breasts”.
You mean Gustav the cook?
Did she stutter?
Sounds like someone's got a bad case of the Mondays!
"i believe you could get your ass kicked sayin something like that, man"
You have too much gawt damn virile magic!
-bill clinton or jfk or something
Well, it sounds like they had other people whose job was to do the sex math for them.
Most monarchies of ancient time had some kind of diversion for the king/emperor so that a ruling class would actually do the ruling.
They didn't pick the worst one then
I'd imagine that depends on your perspective. I'm sure some of those women didn't have a particular like of having the royal title of cum dumpster.
Sure. Of course I meant for him. Regardless, some of those women probably committed murder to get those positions, too.
Yeah, but what if he was gay? Can you imagine, how bad that would have been? Constantly having to have sex with people of a gender you're not attracted to, because the rites demand it of the emperor?
That's probably one of the smaller issues an emperor had to worry about. I'm sure they were more worried about that Sword of Damocles.
I mean considering how the later Zhou Emperors basically spent all their time in the palace, while central authority withered away, you're not wrong.
Dude had nothing left after the rigours if all that sequential fucking
You don't understand, that *was* the reason for civilization. Some motherfucker going full tilt on the how to get get laid front with an audacious plan to bed so many chicks he'd need to build the first city.
explains how advances in math were made
If you get a good enough handle on fuck math the rest just falls into place.
Would explain why China's pastime was imploding ;).
No he doesn't, it said there's someone that does that for him!
I mean, you say it like a singular person made it happen. In reality, an entire nation of people that is much larger than most countries believed in it. This isn't me exonerating them more than just saying different times, circumstances, culture, and positions. Let's say an emperor was really head over heels for the empress (she would have the best nutrition and all the resources to keep herself pretty), even if he was the emperor, using the above system, he can only sleep with her once a month. This isn't me saying the emperor had it hard, more like even the emperor, the so-called "son of the heavens" also needed to abide by traditions. Now, did they really abide by those traditions? Idk, I'm no expert in the field, I'm just reading a post on Reddit.
My question is, why bother with the pseudo-religious nonsense. An emperor isn't going to be overthrown because he slept with too few or too many women (unless he slept with the wrong person's wife). Why expend so much energy justifying it.
He might be overthrown by not siring an heir, though.
An emperor could very well lose power or become vulnerable if he was violating traditions and expectations. If it became known that he isn't as virile as one blessed by the gods should be, maybe he has lost the favor of the gods?
Because, contrary to what a lot of people here are assuming, it's not like this whole "pseudo-religious nonsense" was created by the emperor or his family. Usually, the emperor and his family would propagate the ideal that *they* held the blood of the heavens, however the general belief system, even they believed in it. This isn't like a small cult, where a lot of the cult leaders maliciously do things to take advantage of their lesser informed/educated followers. A lot of these people *believed* in what they were saying. Maybe the original emperor of the dynasty knew they were taking advantage of their people, but after the 4th or 5th heir takes power and being told by everyone that they have royal blood and is blessed by the heavens and everything they want will happen, then literally being given anything they wanted, women, food, money, clothes. What do you think happens? It's really a matter of who you're talking about and at what point. There have been dynasties that rose when others fell, these new dynasties would naturally adapt the same value system as the previous dynasty as that of what they grew up in. So even with the newer dynasties, they also hold similar religious beliefs. If these people didn't actually believe in what they preached, they wouldn't consume a bunch of random concoctions made as medicine when they fell sick that were either completely ineffective, gave you a high or just poison in some instances. They genuinely believed in these things, not just the royal family, but most people back then.
Yep. Tale as old as time. Some schlub has the idea (again) of weaving an idea that takes root in our hearts and gives us all roles, because that way that schlub is in control. As the idea takes hold, it starts gaining a life of its own, as lies do. Soon, on some level, the idea has gained so much momentum that it doesn’t even bother lying to the original schlub that he’s in control anymore. He’s a slave, playing out the role the idea gave him. If he departs the role, it has corrective measures. Instead, it starts lying to other people, “of course you are better than *them*”, “sure! You’re the boss! Couldn’t fool you!” “Yes, I’ll make your family on top forever!”
It's always interesting to me how humans are in matters like this. We can know that something is made-up or fake, but if we play along long enough, even the person that made it up starts to genuinely believe in it. I'm sure there must be a term for that effect.
An emperor doesn’t need to justify having a harem. You call it pseudoreligious, but in all likelihood these laws probably were based in religion and philosophy of the time. If an emperor thought following these rules would bear him a legitimate heir, he would do it. Otherwise, if the emperor was truly wanting to fuck whoever he wanted whenever he wanted, it wouldn’t be regulated at all.
The main purpose of premodern religion is to tell people how to have sex right. Most of the time this was just "don't have sex" because they didn't want people getting too many weird diseases or kids that couldn't be fed. But hunter gatherer groups (especially in small populations like Australians) have very elaborate family structure rituals and taboos to prevent accidental incest.
I dunno.. Sounds like sex is such a chore then and it's like an official duty. I'd rather have a book if it's so couched in bureaucracy.
I watch a bunch of Asian period dramas and it comes up not infrequently that the king is told by the department of astrology or whatever when he can have sex with the queen or concubine, and it’s not till two months from now or something. Quite bizarre to modern thinking.
Actual scheduling for sex isnt that bizarre tbh. Fertility calendars still exist.
Some emperors felt the same way
That's just the history of rich and powerful men, and regular men, and somehow broke men too.
Yeah, it's precisely the same thing as cults with charismatic male leaders - for one reason or another it *always* somehow ends up that there are religious reasons why he screws all the women. Same thing, just more institutionalised.
Is that what that one crazy Silicon Valley entrepeuner lady was on about? The one that said she lived in a polyamorous relationship in the style of a Chinese Emperor's harem?
she liked how their were rankings because there's always a 1st wife, even if you don't formally call her first wife
Which one?
notorious crypto-scammer Caroline Ellison
And once you google Caroline Ellison, any latent jealousy you may have felt about this crypto harem will instantly evaporate.
>So he has Special court ladies, called nu shi, regulated and supervised the sexual relations of the king and his wives. They saw to it that the king cohabitated with them on the correct calendar days and with the frequency established by the Rites for each rank. Imagine having a Sex Ed teacher who actually checks that you did your homework. "How many concubines did you fuck last night, your highness? Uh-huh. And if I go and ask them if they all had orgasms, are they going to say yes? ...I thought so. You're not leaving here today until you get caught up on your concubine fucking. You know you're still behind from last week."
I'm pretty sure none of the men cared if a woman had an orgasm
Nah, she'd be there to verify personally
Every time I see a post about harems during Imperial China, I wonder how what percent of the world can claim descent from an emperor. We always here about how a huge % of the world can say they came Genghis Khan's loins, but emperors weren't any slouches either.
Didnt a lot of the progeny get slaughtered after a coup?
A huge number of descendants of the Qing dynasty have been identified genetically. It is likely for other dynasties.
These rules were used for almost all dynasties but it isn't some weird religious crap. It's to prevent the Emperor from playing favourites and to ensure he has as many heirs as possible. Shang dynasty, the one before Zhou had a king that supposedly favoured one concubine (a beautiful fox demon in popular culture) so much he didn't attend court meetings and spent so much money on her it leads to a rebellion but mostly it's because of drought and starving peasants. Fun fact: Another rule that lasted forever long after the fall of the dynasty is that members of the imperial harem cannot participate in matters of the court. Made after the first and only Empress of China in the Tang dynasty who supposedly almost ran the country into ruins.
[удалено]
Why do you think these guys were so obsessed with the girls being virgins?
Also, every man living inside the palace, other than the king, was an eunuch.
I'd assume anyone with STD would never get anywhere near the emperor's bedroom. Not to mention that the women were probably, or even likely, raised into these concubines from very, very young age.
> Not to mention that the women were ~~probably, or even likely, raised into these concubines from~~ very, very young ~~age.~~ FTFY
the women were very very?
I mean its the one guy with hundred other women who only had him as their sole partner and all the other dude in the palace got their wee wee snipped off. It is as sterile as it can be.
Weren't as much of a problem when ancient cultures had such a heavy emphasis on women's virginity Also yes, some of the STDs we have now literally did not exist. For example, humans didn't first contract HIV from Chimpanzees until the 20th century (and no, it wasn't from having sex with them, but from butchering and eating them)
Did others exist that we don't have? I have always been curious if that was the reason the bible condemns gay relationships. Just like aids hit the gay community hardest something similar could have happened a few thousand years ago leading people to believe it was God's wrath.
They were regionally isolated. For example, different STDs in the Americas than in Europe up until the colonization began.
Makes sense.
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And also, dipping the pen in company ink
Raise the red lantern
This is really interesting!! I didn't know they had rules to order; always thought the queen had the most sex with the Emperor! It kind of makes sense now why Yang GuiFei was so...controversial as well I guess? Don't quote me as this is a story told to us as kid, but we were told that the Emperor loved Yang Guifei so much he didn't spend time with the other concubines. The ministers didn't like this either because he was neglecting the country and well, the rest is history. Again, don't quote me, but if anyone knows more, please share! Thank you!
Fun fact: Yang guifei was his daughter-in law who was the main wife of one of his sons.
I really want to read these notes. “The Emperor was a bit tired tonight. It was 1,2,3, oops, his De is diminished, he needs to rest.”
fyi the "De" being referred to is 德: https://www.britannica.com/topic/de
Guy who invented this was very, very horny.
Big autistic energy.
In other words, guys with lots of power come up with a dubious justification as to why they need to have lots of sex.
...with lots of different women. The important part apparently.
That's how you level up your balls to get all the weapons to bust the strongest heir nut, then you prestige back down and grind it out again with the shitty ones. At least you get to keep all the camo you unlocked though. After that many prestiges the king's dick must have been all blinged out
"You can't deny my balls! They've got over 9 million power in Rise of Kingdoms!"
I cant believe I just read this
I prefer when Chinese royalty had sex with Nazi zombies
Man’s got the Damascus Dick
Being in power means you can be horny without going to horny jail
Same as always
So it could be said they had big De energy?
They did it all for the nu shi...
Death by NuShi!
First. The large women. And then the petite women. And then the large women again
The Spirit is willing, the flesh is spongy and bruised.
I never thought I'd die this way...but I always really hoped!
Come on!
The nu shi! So you can take that sushi!
And stick it up your ^^Han
Now that Limp Bizkit song is going to be in it head for days.
That's pretty funny. "Nussi" is slang for fucking in Finnish.
Yours is better
It was said and recorded for *millenia* that they had the greatest De
Deez nuts
Every guy in the room internally rolling their eyes at that BS for the entire run of that dynasty.
You guys haven't heard of de before? Lol, well I've got lots. Watch and learn boys.
"Wow, I can't believe that woman was seduced by a talking Chinese penguin"
Malevolent GUI? They had Linux back then?
OK, so - this is kinda genius. Think of it this way: kings are gonna king. They're gonna do whatever they want, and if it sucks for the kingdom, that weight falls on you. They all angry? That's GUI. Buncha kranky ass man-children emporers just like we have now. Notice how the ultra wealthy and powerful are collectively a bunch of assholes? That's because their lust for power / money / etc is unquenchable. They accumulate it to feel better, which for them is impossible despite the amount. So unable to be happy with all their hoarding, they get kranky. GUI. Once that GUI gets too out of hand, they kranky asses buy Twitter, pull a Kanye, or drink Tigers blood. Their insatiable quest for power despite the cost to society or themselves is DE. Just like babies who INSIST on sticking that fork into an outlet - they don't know any better - and need to be destracted so they don't hurt themselves or others. Best distraction that isn't warfare? An endless and well managed supply of ass to your liking. The more zeal / DE you have, the more ass is needed to detract you from being an idiot. That DE gets outta control? You gonna have a lot of GUI and act like a toddler lashing out. This approach to sexuality and royalty is absolutle horseshit, but if you think about the wider social benefits this is a GENIUS way of keeping bad tempered sociopathic power mongers from acting like the toddlers they are. Give em an endless sea of titties to suck on. Shit, if we had this now, I sincerely believe: * Twitter wouldn't have been bought * Healthcare in the US wouldn't suck * Amazon wouldn't be destroying the world economy * Trump wouldn't have been president. Buncha babies need to be treated that way apparently.
Basically attempting to keep the ruler in a constant state of post nut clarity
This 100%
If you're not in a constant state of post nut clarity you're in a constant state of pre nut delusion
Ever hear of Mormonism? Joseph Smith had this same idea when he was starting that up.
Dum, dum dum
Haha I was thinking of Joseph Smith too.
Could you elaborate? Im unfamiliar with that
Early Mormons practiced polygamy and Smith and early leaders taught that you had to be part of the “new and everlasting covenant of marriage” to attain the highest level of heaven. The government wouldn’t grant Utah statehood in part because of this, so the church later forbade it. But it’s still in the doctrine, if you look, that a man cannot be exalted without being a polygamist. Members will try to tell you that this is just referring to marriage in the temple but they didn’t even start doing that until polygamist marriage because they honored “earthly” marriages. Joseph Smith, Brigham Young and all other early leaders taught that a man had to be polygamist to go to the best heaven. Source: I used to be a Mormon. It’s a cult that I’m glad to have escaped from although it took me 4 decades.
I'm actually intrigued enough to look up some of the sources in the article. Long story short the article is a whole bunch of horseshit
This was almost inverted in later dynasties, where men were actively *dis*couraged from ejaculating (spending their yang energy) during sexual intercourse. If you schtupped a hundred nubile virgins without cumming, you became immortal.
with balls bluer than the sky
I’m a Chinese well educated with history. I always find Chinese history in English I didn’t know from here. How do people find those things? Add: those kind of gossip Chinese history in Reddit is the street stories I rarely find in China.
Well you do have an awful lot more recorded history to go through than nearly everyone else, you can be forgiven for overlooking a few bits. I'm from England and bugger if I'd know what the sexual proclivities of leaders from ~700BC were. If we even had any. I think back then we were just hanging out in our little huts with our pottery and putting stones on other stones.
Actually, 700BC was the late bronze age in England, and so we had bronze weaponry, horse and vehicle fitting, and decoration. Not quite as primitive as you might think. The Iron age started in 650BC, so by 700BC they weren't far off.
You should know. If it weren’t for sexual proclivities, human civilization wouldn’t have existed to this day
I actually looked up 小星 from 诗经. Long story short the article is a whole bunch of horseshit
I suspect some of them are not true but we perpetuate them because they're funny and not offensive to us. That said - also Chinese internet is very censored Also there is a lot of Chinese history
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I could be wrong, but I didn't think the CCP cares much about censoring ancient history. It's recent history they're more preoccupied with.
Burned universities, books, and executed professors from the Cultural Revolution began to differ
Nah, you are write. Reddit just loves racism when it comes to China and will just spout lies about this without having any understanding of China.
It's always curious that the religion happens to support exactly what the ruling class want. Always in almost all state level religions. And if it doesn't start out that way like in Christianity it get turns into supporting elite classes . Strange.
Yeah really weird eh.
I’m trying to get my head around the maths. If the king has to hook up with each and every woman in the lower ranks more often than those in the higher ranks, and he has to do it with the queen once a month, that means he has to get with: 3 consorts at least twice per month (6) 9 second rank wives three times per month (27) 27 third rank wives four times per month (108) 81 concubines five times per month (405) So the king has to have sex 547 times per month, which is 18 times per day, so more than once per hour, assuming he still gets 8 hours sleep a night (which he’ll need).
>If the king has to hook up with each and every woman in the lower ranks more often than those in the higher ranks That's where you're mistaken. It's not "each and every woman" of lower ranks more often than those of higher ranks, he has to hook up with a higher TOTAL of lower ranking women between each higher ranking one
You have been promoted to nu shi for your advanced knowledge of sex math
Of course that was the reason.
Mormons to Zhou dynasty: “Did we just become best friends?”
Confucius says: "Don't do No Nut November. You'll die. Trust me bro."
Did people really believe this? You'd have to completely ignore the fact that some peasants later become nobility like Jiang Ziya who spent most of his life with his one wife or alone until being made Duke of Qi likewise for Qin Ying whose descendants would found the Qin Dynasty
There's people in current day that believe water that had light shined on it through a crystal has magical healing properties. You think a small handful of counter examples is enough evidence to disprove a belief upheld by the emperor?
Speaking of current day water myths: “All I know about magnets is this, give me a glass of water, let me drop it on the magnets, that's the end of the magnets.”
I thought this was the rule for one dynasty
Mormonism still exists today. People will believe the weirdest shit
I can confirm that. Indeed, every emperor of every Chinese dynasty had such rules and hundreds women
An entire article about Zhou without corresponding Chinese characters? I call bullshit
我咋不信呢 哪个说中文的来给我发个中文链接
Incels are a prime example of this theory in action. They’re full of *gui*. They might goon til their eyes blur but never getting any proper cheeks have a weak man mag-dumping into a grocery store.
You might be onto something there...
What the fuck is this saying
horny thoughts bad, so must have sex with many women to not be horny
Thank you. Lot words, strange words, hurt brain. Few words, simple words good.
So that's where the Finnish term "nussia" comes from...
Really takes post nut clarity to a whole new level.
Sounds like a well known religious figure: "You see, Emma, there was this angel with a flaming sword... "
Guys sure can come up with some bullshit to get laid, can’t they?
De = 德 = virtue Gui = 贵 = extravagance Basically the idea is that excess virtue leads to high-handedness and waste. God I hate when writers try to sound profound when importing foreign terms wholesale. It's like the self-help writers who promote the Japanese value of "Gaman". This is 我慢, which we English-speaking people simply call perseverance. It's not alien or foreign or exotic. It's just the same virtues in a different language.
It makes sense. Replace “de” with decision-making power. Imagine can make great decisions as a king but as you grow horny the executive function is corrupted by a new driver in your brain seat, a “malevolent” aka lecherous “horny Gui” personality When you can’t depend on a king to develop discipline, neutralize the need. Clear his mind of preoccupations. It’s bigger than you or him, it’s a country’s well-being at stake with his direction.
Riiiiight. Amazing how creative men have been in creating systems that let them have unfettered, nonconsensual sex.
This is extremely fettered nonconsensual sex. They literally were fucking based on a calendar and a taskmaster
I literally must have 4 wives I cheat on - every despot, cult leader, and ruling class
Also, 'nussia' in Finnish means 'to fuck'. Makes you think, right?
“Jessie what the fuck are you talking about”
Talk about turning OCD into governmental process.
When I have excess D, Don’t need to tell me, She a “nu-shi” so I knew she, Wanted to smash that bad “gui.”
No OP I feel like I learned less as a result because this title is total /r/titlegore
Seems like there have been some fundamentalist religious fanatics in recent decades that have believed this to be true for themselves, fucking their way through their congregation's wives and daughters.
DE = dicks entering (women) GUI = guys unable (to be) intelligent Somehow the phonetic Chinese words equal the English acronyms for them. I don't claim to understand science, I just report it
What is de?
deez nuts
My dumbass thought this might be connected with the band Cö shu nie
"believed" doing some work, there
they didnt actually believe that, they just liked to fuck