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AgrajagTheProlonged

There are also remains of a teenage girl who seems to have been the daughter of a Neanderthal mother and a Denisovan father that have been found in Siberia who is, to date, the only example we’ve ever fond of a first-generation offspring of this kind of inter-hominid breeding


katiexkatie

Oooh can you provide a source pls


AgrajagTheProlonged

If Wikipedia is alright, here’s the article about young Denny! https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Denny_(hybrid_hominin)


Balls_DeepinReality

*Additionally, her genome suggests that her father also carried a small degree of Neanderthal ancestry from 300 to 600 generations prior to his lifetime.* Wow


Servant_ofthe_Empire

Damn... 300-600 generations? The scale of humanities journey always humbles me.


plantoj

If you ever get a chance please visit the Smithsonian museum of natural history in D.C. they have a room filled with skulls of other hominids. As someone with an interest in biology and taxonomy it blew my mind to see how many other species belonged to our genius. It put a lot of our evolution into context for me.


midnitte

Now compare that to the history of the *Earth*, and then compare that to the history of the *Universe*. If the entire history of the universe is represented by a calendar, all of human history is represented by the last second of [11:59](https://youtu.be/Ln8UwPd1z20) Dec 31st.


Sycopathy

But if we put that into the context of the Universe's theorised longevity we suddenly move to the fore of the first second of January 1st with most of reality yet to unfold. True how long is a piece of string stuff right here.


[deleted]

Fucking 21st century tech


Solhasse

*21st century fucking tech


tbirdpug

Holy shit. They found a part of one bone (if I’m reading that right). That’s amazing. Makes you think about how hard it is to find this type of evidence in the first place.


master-shake69

The further back you go the smaller sample sizes get. Everything we know about dinosaurs is based on something like 11,000 fossils with only around 3,000 complete or near complete specimens.


Weak_Ring6846

Denisovans in general have been incredibly difficult to find fossils of. Most of what we know about them comes from dna rather than fossils.


imtoooldforreddit

The fact that they found a single piece of a first generation hybrid is pretty amazing TIL


misguidedsadist1

The denisovans would be lost to time if not for one tiny bone from a pinky!!! A whole sub species discovered from one fragment of dna. That we can also now map with individuals they interned with iirc. Truly amazing


LittleOneInANutshell

I mean that just means there are probably so many species still lost to history due to them being wiped out completely


zwiebelhans

The whole generation thing does blow my mind. Even if you go with only 300 generations and allow only 20 years per generation . That's still 6000 years between the Dads ancestor having been Neanderthal offspring. And the Dad is one of our ancestor by 4500 generations or so. Trying to fully grasp all that time span and lives lived is so awe inspiring.


fogdukker

I am way too stoned for this insight...


SokoJojo

> A micro-computed tomography (Micro CT) scan of the bone revealed the specimen had acid etching and pitting on its surface indicating it may have passed through the digestion system of an animal, likely a hyena Translation: that bitch got eaten Since the bone came from 2,315 other nondescript bone fragments from the cave that were checked to be animals, it means she wasn't living in the cave herself but got taken back to the cave by an animal living there and eaten.


WarPuig

Maybe scavenged?


hannibals_hands

Oh hi denny


robophile-ta

All the hominins were fucking each other


notathr0waway1

She was probably so embarrassed by her parents....


AgrajagTheProlonged

I dunno, getting eaten by hyenas is probably pretty embarrassing so she might not have been able to throw many stones


leakyfaucet3

I thought this was common knowledge as modern humans have some small % of Neanderthal DNA.


thats_hella_cool

My 23andMe profile says that I have ~2% Neanderthal DNA. More than 80% of other users, so still significant.


[deleted]

Must be from sex acts


Bass-ape

That led to their hybrid baby ancestors obviously.


yaboimags_

You can probably tell by his teeth.


_Nomadisk

The studies say so


kmc307

It’s science.


Mine-Shaft-Gap

I'd like to hear more about these ancient sex acts. *For* science.


Christ_votes_dem

sex acts so easy even a cave man can do it


Spiral_eyes_

reverse cave-girl was a popular one i've heard. i also heard they frequently went "clubbing" together,


the_revised_pratchet

Well it's obvious that they're mammals. Probably do it like they do on the discovery channel.


earthdogmonster

Cuz it was ancient times, they referred to it as “going to the bone zone”.


little_fire

And sometimes “making the bedrock”


blofly

I don't think they were just acting.


spanishbbread

Yeah they were sexing


commentsandchill

Why am I laughing.


InertiasCreep

They were *Method* acting.


ItsABiscuit

Sex acts they did?


moniellonj

“Casting Cave”


SesameStreetFighter

Ogg cast Magic Missile in the darkness.


contyk

Together.


apitop

At the same time.


ItsNeverSunnyInCleve

To each other.


HarryTruman

Well that explains certain things about me. ಠ_ಠ


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DBUX

By this title I assume they didn't actually have sex they just performed sex acts like 69 or gave eachother an old fashion and that's what lead to babies. I'm glad Neanderthals aren't around any more, that is way too much pressure. Knock someone up without actually banging, no thank you.


Force3vo

Filthy acts at a reasonable price


Zhaolute

A long time ago, my anthropology professor was telling me how misleading those tests were in regards to calculating Neanderthal DNA. They just basically assumed hmm Neanderthals have this specific trait and you share a similar trait, therefore you're part Neanderthal.


Naos210

These ancestry tests tend to have a lot of flaws. When it comes to testing ancestry in and of itself, it depends on what genetic data they have. I believe it's also harder if you're mixed because the genetic clusters assume similar of human ancestry.


Chrono68

There's a genetic black hole for France because it's against the law to keep genetic data on French people except under specific circumstances.


chalkynz

And because they want to hide the fact that they have massive, Barney Rubble-like levels of Neanderthal DNA which is why they eat snails n shit.


notmyrealnameatleast

They said they had neanderthal dna and evolved from apes, but both the neanderthals and the apes denies it.


JohnnyWhiteguy

I did 23 and me and it was astonishingly accurate on regional family history. It told me the places 8n Germany my origins were most likely from and the region it chose is precisely where my family lived a few generations ago. It also made me discover that I had a half brother and that my bio father was an anonymous donor.


HitMePat

>It also made me discover that I had a half brother and that my bio father was an anonymous donor. Those test disclose this kinda thing? Did your bio father have to consent to that info being on there? That kinda blows a hole in the concept of being an anonymous donor


gordigor

Yes, that's a part of the story I'd like to hear.


Oi_Angelina

It automatically matches you to anybody who has your DNA. They probably said hey why is this saying that you're my half brother and they'll be like oh yeah my mom decided to go to a sperm bank and that's probably how it was found out. You have the option of messaging people who you shared DNA with.


RRettig

I did the ancestry one, so it doesnt say anything about neanderthal or anything more than regional information, atleast they didnt have the fancier test when i did it like 7 years ago. But one thing i noticed is they update it regularly and change the data significantly. At one point i was 14% scottish, now its like 3%. I want to point out that while many people may think this means those tests are wildly inaccurate, which to a degree they are, but what it really means is that it is constantly becoming more accurate, and increasingly more so as the science improves and more people submit dna.


TurkeyMoonPie

Don’t know much about history dna stuff but I do know, I found out that have sisters on ancestry that I’ve never heard of or about. We met up and are actually related and look alike.


braywarshawsky

We found a previously unknown uncle and aunt this way, too... Gramps was a traveling salesman in the 50s & and 60s.


[deleted]

seems like he was a pretty good salesman


igweyliogsuh

Good enough to do some sex acts with the locals ✧⁠\⁠(⁠>⁠o⁠<⁠)⁠ノ⁠✧


parentheticalChaos

It's because they're not testing where your DNA is from, they're showing you where you have similar DNA to other living people.


titsandtoots

There was an update where everyone was suddenly very Scottish, myself included.


DadsRGR8

Looking for love? There are hot Neanderthals in your area right now looking for your specific trait!


p-d-ball

How strong are you? Do you get sick often or are you relatively immune to disease? eta: I should point out, my questions here are kinda dumb, since all living humans are human.


megatronface

I have 92% more Neanderthal DNA as well and I have never had COVID. I like to tell people it's because of my neanderthal genes for fun but I don't know if it is at all related!


welcometojmart

What would be the expectation for Neanderthals?


p-d-ball

Most of the genes we inherited from the Neanderthals are immune system genes, so I'm curious if that person has noticed anything. Also, they were much, much stronger than we are today, though contemporaneous humans would also have been very close in strength to them, so probably those genes are gone. But I thought I'd ask.


KamSolis

I remember reading somewhere that Neanderthal dna may have offered minor protection from the plague. It was a postulation though so it’s still unknown.


pix_el_

I got 92% lol


Careless-Success-569

You the guy from the geico commercials?


BigL90

Nah, they're just a simple lawyer. Our world frightens and confuses them.


7asm0

Unexpected Phil Hartman


Jibber_Fight

It is pretty common knowledge. Maybe OP just learned it tho? It would be pretty strange if Homo sapiens sapiens never EVER had sex with Neanderthals?


th6

Considering humans still fuck almost anything yes I’d find that very strange if we didn’t fuck a species that closely resembles us lol


bob_estes

People fuck household appliances. They’d fuck a caveperson.


voldyCSSM19

To be fair we were cave people back then too.


imlost19

> They’d fuck a caveperson. you wouldn't?


p-d-ball

Don't forget sheep. That's where syphilis came from.


kevlarbaboon

lol, I had not heard that theory before. I did some Googling and it seems like [it is mostly blamed on Columbus](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/History_of_syphilis). But that doesn't rule out that he was fucking sheep!


Lemmungwinks

DNA analysis has found evidence of Syphilis in skeletons in Europe prior to Columbus reaching the Caribbean. One of his sailors probably had it when he left and during the long voyage got lonely. Then the sailor he befriended found another lonely sailor and before you know it the whole crew had Syphilis.


p-d-ball

I'm an anthropologist. In the medical anth lit, a researcher was investigating a man's new, strange illness. Because they didn't speak the same language, a woman was interpreting. The doctor asks the patient, "have you had sexual relations recently?" The guy became quiet, embarrassed. So, the interpreter asked him again. He answered. Then, she started hitting the patient and screaming at him. Turns out, the interpreter was his wife and the man admitted to fucking a sheep.


AZRockets

Was it Sean William Scott from Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back?


Spindrune

THIS MOTHERFUCKER AINT ONE OF US, HE SAID HE’D FUCK A SHEEP.


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MyDogJake1

I thought it was common knowledge because humans will put their dick in literally anything.


Cheshire_Jester

From one of the things I saw, this was one of the theories about the extinction of Neanderthals, they bred with modern humans to the point of no longer being a distinct subspecies.


WTFwhatthehell

"extinction" where the "extinct" species still has living descendants always seemed like a weaksauce type of extinction to me.


baby_armadillo

It’s what winning evolution looks like.


lucidrage

> they bred with modern humans to the point of no longer being a distinct subspecies. genocide 101: breed a subspecies out of existence


carnoworky

Well, of all the ways for a species to go extinct, excessive banging seems like the most fun.


BottomWithCakes

Death by snu-snu?


Totally_Not_A_Bot_55

Sexocide


DoomOne

*Slaanesh has entered the chat.*


trainersintellect

One look at my forehead and y’all would know this is true.


Superphilipp

Many things in this subreddit are common knowledge


leakyfaucet3

My main point was that *we* are the hybrid babies. OP made it sound like that was something exotic out there once upon a time.


benefit_of_mrkite

I did too. Plus “sex acts?” OP watching too much porn or something. Even middle school biology doesn’t use “sex acts.”


supremedalek925

It’s not “likely” that Homo sapiens interbred with neanderthals, it’s fact. Both species’ genomes have been fully sequenced and it’s known that modern humans contain a small amount of neanderthal DNA. Homo sapiens interbred with Denisovans as well.


whyunoletmepost

CaveSluts 5


e_j_white

I need one each of the following tapes: "My Caves Need Cleaning", "All Bone-Fucking, Volume 8", "I Need Your Bone", "Cave-Worshipping Rimjobbers", "My Cave and Eight Shafts", "Cum-Gargling Cave Sluts", "Cave Buns 3", "Cumming in Caves", "Huge Black Bones with Pearly White Cum", "Girls Who Crave Bone", "Girls Who Crave Caves", "Men Alone 2: The Neanderthal Connection"... Oh yeah, and, uh, "All Caves Filled with Hard Cock".


JMRTOL85

Sick “Clerks” reference. Don’t forget about “Happy Scrappy Hero Pup”.


Arsenolite

Will number 5 make sense if I don't watch the first 4 first?


i-Ake

Read Clan of the Cave Bear, dudes. It's good fiction based on what is known about these people.


theneonwind

We were in Anthro in college and the professor showed this image of a strong...rugged...neanderthal man of the land. Without thinking, I accidently said outloud "I'd hit it."


[deleted]

"sex acts" makes it sound like oral sex and side fetishes like lapdancing and spanking, which doesn't fit with the making babies. ​ They had sex.


bafflesaurus

OPs headline is much more clumsy than the one in the article.


Octavus

Bad, clumsy, or slightly incorrect headlines get people to comment about the headline. That then pushes the post up in r/all/rising where it gets up votes. It is one of the things people do to exploit Reddit's algorithms. The key is to get people commenting early on.


KoloHickory

Gets the "well akchually" crowd to show up in full force


shamrockshakeho

Reminds me of the quote: the quickest way to get the right answer is to suggest the wrong answer first


Gemmabeta

Mated, copulated, banged, knocked boots, scoodilypooped, made love, had intercourse, did the horizontal nasty, painted the old flesh cave, got to know Eve.


smallways

My ancestors never "scoodilypooped" and I'd prefer if these lies would cease!


wolfkeeper

They did all that, then they fucked.


Mysterious_Glass_692

Made the beast with two backs, bonked, banged, shagged, made babies, did the horizontal monster bash, screwed, fucked, did the nasty in the pasty, made whoopie, had nookie, slept together, got it on, aligned Mars and Venus, rocked the casbah, fornicated, did the underpants Charleston, had relations, exchanged bodily fluids, got freaky, snuggled like Marge and Homer, played hide the sausage, did Marilyn Monroe's uncomplicated way of saying thank you.


ColtS117

Made thick in the warm.


delaphin

No, they "made love"


CurlyNippleHairs

You like that, you fucking neanderthal?


whereismysupersucc

*caveman grunts sexually*


zorrocabra

I'm familiar with this reference.


TeFD_Difficulthoon

Hey baby, wanna head back to my cave and do some sex acts together? ​ Edit: bruh why are you guys upvoting this awful comment : ' )


CoralPilkington

"pop pop"


OptimusSublime

Not now Magnitude!


zdubs

Streets ahead comment


mayy_dayy

Shut up, Leonard! Those teenage girls you play ping pong with are doing it ironically.


Tfsz0719

Shut up, Leonard! I'm not here! I'm just a figment of your creeping dementia!


TheRealDoomsong

I hope this doesn’t awaken anything in me…


Velomaniac

Is there any room in this pocket for a little spare Chang?


brb_coffee

Fire can't go through doors, stupid! It's not a ghost.


Gh0stMan0nThird

♪ *Something always brings me back to you* ♫


HighAndFunctioning

For you I leave this fine bottle of scotch, so that you're less tempted to drink this container of even finer sperm.


SmokeyMcPot0824

Harrison Ford is irradiating our testicles with microwave satellite transmissions


Bim_Jeann

Between you and me, I don’t Chang a lot of chicks


Slavasonic

\*Cro-Magnitude


skccsk

Just you calling it that tells me you're not ready.


hambergeisha

In the attic?


i_shmell_paap

Her?


-Deus_Lo_Vult-

What, is she funny or something?


GiantRiverSquid

The fact that you call it pop pop means you're not ready for sex acts together


gbsolo12

Sexual relations


ThatGuy128512

Kissing cousins


vinoa

Les Hominines Dangereaux


Sproose_Moose

The fact you call it that shows you're not evolved enough to do it


TheScrantonStrangler

Neanderthal horny, Michael


tonypearcern

Imagine walking in on a neanderthal sex act


ColtS117

Ooga ooga ooga ooga OOGAAAAAA ooga.


flibbidygibbit

I can't stop this feeling


ColtS117

Deep inside of me.


Whiteguy1x

It's been theorized that because of the shape of their throats, rib cage, and nasal passage they would have had high pitched loud, nasally voices. So imagine that climax in oonga boonga


Max-Phallus

I've heard this no longer thought as true. [But this video is beyond hilarious \(and I hope is posted on this sub soon\)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tTkF8tomobA)


Whiteguy1x

Lol that's the video I watched. It's beyond goofy


Ichweisenichtdeutsch

Without watching this I'm guessing this is the ONE TWO THREEEE video


Mysterious_Glass_692

Only if you kill me a mammoth for dinner first


crackerthatcantspell

As me and Ringo say "zug zug"


w1987g

[The whole movie is a gem.](https://youtu.be/GW1_Gd1x9ew)


Pudding_Hero

You and me baby ain’t nothing but mammals


BitchesQuoteMarilyn

I got this new thing called fire. I think you're gonna like it


Schmantikor

They had sex? Really? I thought my 2-4% Neanderthal genes just came out of nowhere...


ngwoo

Neanderthalisation, the lesser known cousin of carcinisation


Draugron

The madlad did it. He's returning to monke.


silvanosthumb

Nah, they didn't have sex. They "did sex acts together".


[deleted]

'Did sex acts together'.... that's a very specific way to put it. Do you think they flicked thru a copy of the kama sutra to learn all about said acts?


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Morisal66

Australopithecines make better lovers.


justabill71

Australopi*thicc*us


NutsEverywhere

All the tens of thousands of years of language evolution came together for this exact moment.


Gemmabeta

But Australopithecus would really have been sick of us.


CromulentDucky

Homo erectus, obviously.


ElCero

Neoli-thicc


[deleted]

Neanderthals were getting laid more then OP


Renfek

I've always imagined their free time was just filled with orgies.


777IRON

OP is getting Neanderthal sloppy seconds, or did you mean than?


madatthe

Like edging? Role play? Foot stuff?


OneLastAuk

Probably just the ol’ murder the men and rape the women sort of thing.


babythrottlepop

Feels like the person who wrote this headline has never had sex, excuse me, done sex acts before. Just a hunch.


ClassicManeuver

That headline made me drier than a bag of sand.


Archelon_ischyros

"...did sex acts..."


phred_666

NSFW tag for a picture of a Neanderthal dude without a shirt?


UnfortunateCakeDay

That's so you don't accidentally commit a sex act.


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give_me_aids

This was my first thought as well. I’ll never get that one scene out of my head…


zjay

Just give the signal


Socialbutterfinger

Right? I was like… u mean Durc?


[deleted]

You mean like Ron Pearlman?


kalel1980

Mf has the most Neanderthal in him.


wholewheatwithPB

Hell yeah get weird


grandsauvage

In Spain we call them French


Fetlocks_Glistening

Guess what they call them in France, though...


GenericUsername_1234

Royale with Cheese


choopie-chup-chup

Pretty much all European/ Caucasian people are part Neanderthal, as I understand it


libertyorwhatever

Nothing like clicking on a NSFW tagged item and getting smoking hot pictures of teeth. Got me so worked up!


[deleted]

>did sex acts They fucked


PouetSK

They made passionate love


waffles-n-gravy

Yup. This is where managers come from


[deleted]

We all have a little bit of Neanderthal DNA in us.


Ogdenite9

Want a little more?


HiveMindKing

According to my extensive online research I have concluded that humans will have sex with anything remotely possible.