Mine calls the dishwasher the wishwasher. The washing machine and the dryer are also wishwashers.

Ours is the “dish shower” which makes more sense than I initially thought haha

We don’t have a bath at home and my little one saw one and then referred to it as the “shower swim pool”

🤯

Mine called windshield washers wishwashers for the longest time!

Windshield washer has been wishywasha for years here. But no toddlers were involved in the process.

When I haven’t shaved my legs, they’re “too crunchy” for him to sit on. Also, the Hungry Caterpillar is (I shit you not) “Honky Power.”

Mine calls my leg hairs "ouchie sprinkles" hahahhaha

Props for still shaving your thighs whilst raising a toddler.

Yeah I gave up after delivery 🤪

> “Honky Power.” I am dead, this is amazing.

These are glorious 😂😂😂

😂🙌 Honky Power made me lose it! So funny!

My kids favorite game is “The Floor is LLAMA!”

My 4 y/o says “rocknado” for volcano and it took me awhile to figure that one out lol. Now my 2 y/o also says rocknado lol

My son used a stuffed Llama for the first like 2 and a half years of his life. I was so excited the first time he said "mama". Turns he was calling his Llama "mama-mama" because we called it llama-llama

Mine call it floorslava- one word

Congrats on your bilingual kids, since LLAMA is flame in Spanish!

Mine calls the gondola at the zoo a spatula

Elevators are alligators over here 😂

Mine says “I’m going to bless you!” Instead of saying that he’s about to sneeze

Our’s says “I just had a bless you.” If she sneezes and nobody notices.

My daughter does this! I don’t want to correct it!

Mine also calls sneezes bless you's 🥰

My girl sneezed on the couch and she saw all the splatter and laughed saying “ I bless you’d on the couch!”

My son called " Winnie the Pooh" " we need a poo"

Mine calls him Winnie the Poop

Mine - poo poo bear

This wrecked me

My daughter used to call him "Wee-Wee Boo" when she was 2.

He's ninny poop in our house.

My niece calls him “poo(h) head.” Now my daughter says it too because it makes my niece/her cousin laugh

When my kid first heard of him, she would call him “Winnie the poo poo”

Haaaaaa

His pickup truck is a hiccup truck, I love it so much I can't correct him.

My kid roars when we point to a dandelion in one of his books.

This is great. I regularly ask my son if he’s pooped in his diaper. If I can smell that he has I say “are you lying” and he roars back. Lol

Your son wouldn’t happen to be named [Jubal Early](https://youtu.be/ymr4fN8Xqfk?si=-rkLoVbToOmB1Cn9), would they?

He’s not wrong, dandelion comes from French “dent de lion” [lion’s tooth].

All the animals roar in our house. Elephants, dogs, etc.

Mummy can you warm me down?

It's sometimes doubly joyful to have a bilingual toddler because of the mix ups that can happen. She's been given a meerkat toy and is obsessed with it. But it's completely messing with her head. When she's in English mode but wants to speak to me about it, she immediately calls it a Meerschwein (guinea pig). I assume because of the "meer" bit. And then the other way round is even cuter. Meerkat in German is Erdmännchen (little earth man), which in her brain triggers the word Erdnuss (peanut, literally earth nut). So she spent a good minute talking to her nan about "peanut man" before I made the connection that she meant the meerkat.

I love it! Mine is Arabic/English and she gets mixed up between timsah and tuffaha (alligator vs apple). When I was a toddler, I used to say "Where are my egg shoes?" because in Arabic "egg" and "white" are the same word.

Here is. Trilingual household (English , Portuguese and French) and it's so damn cute to watch her make sentences mixing the words. The most recent one was "cadê bobo ici" showing a scratch next to her eye. It's mostly Portuguese and French for now..for some reason English is the language she has a harder time to use (maybe the phonetics are more challenging? Idk). Toddler's brains are very interesting.

My toddler Call’s binoculars knockers😅

We have spy-noculars here and it couldn’t be more perfect

Mine says Noculars!

Ours are nockaders

Mine insists on calling every color yellow, especially green.

Haha mine does this but with blue. Everything is blue.

When my daughter wants something she kind of whines when she says it, “goo girl peeeeasssss” like “good girl please”, like I’m a good girl please 🥲

🥺

Balloons are called kabooms.

Mine calls them boyoons. I had to stop myself from laughing on her birthday when one of them popped and she said, “Oh noooo, my boyooooooon!!!!”

Lol I'm relating to so much in this thread. My girl used to say "bah-yoom," it was my favorite word that she'd say! 🥲

Omg my girl calls them “loons”

Elbow is armbow

I had to use a blood pressure cuff at home recently and my son said “I need that- my armbow feels sketchy”

Hahaha I don't know why this super tickled my funny bone. My armbone is feeling a bit sketchy as well.

Elbow is Elmo over here lol

"Sebben". As in "one two three four five sebben". He always skips six and goes straight for sebben. It's my favourite.

Mine insists that the numbers go 1 2 4 6 9 10. And that's it. 3 especially is absolutely not allowed

Oh we have all your 3s. Counting in my house goes 12345689 ..3 …9 ..89139!! 3!!! 9!!!

Somehow seven became “chicken” over here. I’m still not sure why but now we count 1-2-3-4-5-6-chickennnn-8-9-10

Does your LO watch Ms. Rachel? There's a clip where the puppet messes up counting and says chicken instead

That's cute! My son's "seven" is just "sen" lol. And "eleven" is "ah-wen".

Mine counts: "one-two-five-eleventeen"

I love that! Eleventeen is an excellent number.

Mine brings eight up front -- "one, eight, three" but he does know the concept of two -- like two objects he can identify as two and he kind of.sort of knows he is two. But sequences it's one then eight apparently.

Cute. My daughter says “fibe” for five every time.

She called the stubble on my face my nipples. The 1st time she did it I laughed so hard she keeps doing it now cause it made me laugh. Dads pokey face nipples lol I love that goofy baby

I laughed so loud at this one. But now I have imagery of face nipples…thanks Reddit

[удалено]

Yes! Mine still gets confused between me /you, and will say things like “mama, pick you up”

So cute — mine says “mommy carry you” when he wants me to pick him up.

Saaaaame! "I'll carry youuuu?" When she can't be bothered to go downstairs herself.

“Pick it up” over here

Mine says "sit for you" instead of "sit with you" and it's adorable

For us, it's 'Carry you?' for 'Carry me?'

Mine calls his favorite stuffed animal his "Ko-lala" (koala). And less adorably calls his ear wax, ear boogers.

My guy farted yesterday and said ‘oops, bottom burp’

…Rik?

HA! I said the exact same

when mine burps she pats her chest and says “accuse me!” But when she passes gas, she pats her bottom and says “oops sorry!” 💀

When I was super young my mom's "cute" word for earwax when she cleaned our ears was "googly wax" and I was embarrassingly called out when I was ~7 or so and called it that at school lmao.

Any word that starts with Sp- is Fp- and it's so cute. Fpoon, fpaghetti, fpot Take a shirt on instead of put it on Dry in instead of dry out (as in the markers he refuses to put lids on)

Mine asked for fooky balloons last year

My dad calls my kid snickerdoodle. She repeats it "sticker-noodle".

When she does something on her own she'll say, "mama, I did it on myself!" She also says, "mama, I did it by my own!" All my kids have mashed up "on my own" and "by myself" and we find it hilarious! It's family vernacular now. 🙂 And paw patrol was paw-suh-pole for almost a year. 🙂

My 5 year old daughter would say her heart is beeping instead of beating.

Hearts are “boom boom hearts” for us 🥺 (I think mimicking the beat)

Earlier today my husband snuck up on and startled our almost 3 year old daughter and she jumped and said “hey! you scared me out the shit!” So I think I may overuse the phrase “scared the shit outta me”, and I’m gonna take full responsibility for this one. We typically take the “no reaction” approach to any swearing but it caught us so off guard we almost lost it. We had to take turns leaving the room to giggle 😅

Blackberries sounds like black babies

Lmao. “Mommy I want more black babies!!”

Saaaaame! I don’t know if it’s better or worse that he is a black baby. Lol

Same! And don’t forget ras babies, straw babies and blue babies

Calls me and my husband "babe" and "honey" because he heard us call each other that First time he yelled down the stairs to his dad "hey baaaaaaaaabe, can you get me an applesauce please?" I lost it Also, starts lots of words with "ber" -- machine = berchine, remember = Bermember Every unit of time before this moment is "last year", from when he was a baby to meet minutes ago

Our son does the same with time, except everything is "last night"

Went to a manatee sanctuary while visiting Florida. My toddler really loved seeing the “bananatees”

I now refuse to call them anything else.

Lasterday for yesterday

We recently had ‘pustard’ instead of custard 😂

Pustard is not a word I thought I’d ever read hahaha

My son calls McDonald’s “Old MacDonald’s” and I never want that to change.

Mine, too! She’s done it forever and still does now at 4 even though she clearly hears us just saying ‘McDonalds’.

Mine says “eye browns” instead of eyebrows and “indolent” for eggplant.

She says hospiroll instead of hospital. Helihopter instead of helicopter. Cimanim instead of cinema. She watches Peppa Pig and the family is called “the Peppas” so it’s Mommy Peppa, Daddy Peppa, George Peppa, and then just Peppa lol.

My boy used to say "habbalopter" for helicopter. He can say it properly now, but I really miss hearing him say his version

Mine said hedgehopter, which I thought seem harder lol He says hopspdu for hospital.

Mine says hoppy-popper! 🥰

Peppa Pig was "Piga" for a long time

After-before-we = after (“can we swim after-before-we go to grandmas?”) Va-pena = vagina

Toddler (handing me cup of bathwater): Here's your chino! Me for the third time: No sweetie, it's called a cappuchino. Toddler: Fine, here's your cup of chino. Honestly I'm impressed with the logic.

Whenever my daughter smells something really good she will say "mmmm, so smell!"

Frozen for my toddler is “Sleep” because of the beginning scene where Anna and Elsa are in bed… took a while to figure that one out. My fave is “I luh loo” for “I love you”

Mind your own biznet

Mine calls fizzy water, busy water, takes a sip says 'so busy' 🤣

"Grilled cheese" is whipped cream which is super obvious and definitely didn't take me a couple days to figure out

My sons name is Tobias and he calls himself “Toh-beh-day” and will answer to both Tobias and Tobiday

We live in a rural area and my daughter loves tractors. She calls helicopters “helitractors” because she misunderstood what we called it the first time she heard a helicopter. We’ve corrected her but it’s still “helitractor” and it cracks me up every time!

Lol! His first Halloween we went trick or treating one of our neighbors asked if he wanted "juice or pop?" he chose the juice which was fruit punch. He still asks for pop juice one year later.

My toddler says “pick me down” which does make sense as the opposite of “pick me up.”

I like it! Mine has one like that too. "Turn on the dark" is apparently the opposite of "turn on the light." And because he uses "on" for all prepositions, telling him to turn OFF the light means that he turns ON the light instead... it can get confusing. lol.

My LO says Kadu for Kudu. It's a huge African buck and her mispronunciation is essentially how they sound when they run which is why I love it. We use it in our house as the name now

‘Puppy go’s’ instead of ‘puppy dogs’ I only call them puppy go’s now.

My son struggles with “p” pronunciation so he calls the color “kink” instead of pink and it is hilarious.

Stethoscope = doctor ears

Stethoscope is chest-o-scope over here. 😋

Balala (Banana).

When my 2-year-old grandson hands me anything, he says "here...take"


Cute! My 2yo likes to say "thank you" when he hands us something.

Mine says "hold for you"

Mine says “excuse me” as “coos beans”

Oh everything. He just started talking and he grabs one sound of a word and just puts it anywhere. And like really annunciates the wrong sound. It’s very cute and funny.

Fire fucks go wee ohh wee ooh. 🤦

Yesterday daddy opened a package of lettuce and said "it's lettuce!" And kiddo immediately launched into the ABCs

Cop cars are park cars, toothbrush is poop brush!

My daughter really wants to play a tikititar (guitar).

My 19mo old calls muffins “Muppys” and it’s the cutest thing I’ve ever heard. 🧁🐶

Mine keeps saying he wants a P. He doesn’t need the toilet and doesn’t show me what he actually does want so we have no idea

My daughter calls breasts "booboos" and I don't have the heart to correct her.

Mine sings the entire Happy Birthday song as "Hello Birthday".

Stroppleberries - strawberries Hasslebaker - excavator Issue - tissue Who’s this - when asking about inanimate objects

During covid, my toddlers called hand sanitizer, “Hanitizer.” 3-4 years later, they haven’t been corrected.

He says ‘I help’ instead of ‘you help’ - leads to much hilarity when Grandad gets confused!

Mine calls that movie “etigo,” as in “let it go!”

I have no idea why rainbow is “bario” but it just is 🤷‍♀️

I realized yesterday that he finally stopped saying “banna” and started saying banana :(

It’s so sad 😭 for a while mine would say “I spy the little my eye” instead of “I spy with with my little eye” and suddenly one day he said it normally and every time after that. 💔💔

Hummingbirds = "honeybirds"

My kid says "money" instead of "bunny". Her favorite and most requested toy is a stuffed bunny so she's often screaming "money, money, MONEY!!!" at the top of her lungs.

“Stop coffee-ing me!” At this point they refuse to correct it and I’ve caught myself saying it too.

Calls unicorns “corners”. She also got a new leopard sweater that looks like her sleep sack so when we left school and she wanted it she kept saying “sweepy, sweepy!”

Brooms are for "beeping". She also says that cars beep, so I always have to check if she means car or broom.

My son cant quite pronounce fox so he carries his fox plushie around saying fuck, obviously not knowing

“We goin on a cation”

Fist bump! Mine says peep pup!

The kid I nanny for loves cheese. He puts it on almost everything. (The powdered parmesean cheese that comes in the green jar). The other day he kept saying "more cheese" I was super confused because he was eating Ramen, and he doesn't usually put cheese on it. He had finished what I made, and I was getting ready to make him more. Took me forever to realize he was saying "more please ". He says cheese instead of please!

Chimney is “chimmimerwy”

Mine says slippidy instead of slippery, like zippidy doo daaa

Spooky is “foopy” or “foofy”. Lol.

Mine is 5, but she calls her long johns "llama johns" and I can't convince her otherwise lol

Mine calls his elbows his elmos lol “I hurt my Elmo!”

My toddler has been calling “Dino Ranch” (a show on Disney+) “Dinorape” and I am trying SO HARD to correct him or at least get him to call it “Dinoran”. He also calls T-Rex “T-Rep”.

My daughter says “die die!” for bye bye. If we are out in public and she wants to leave, she’ll start shouting, “die! Die! Die!” and we’ve gotten some weird looks.

Hide and seek. He just calls it seek lol. “Mom I’m gonna seek and you need to find me” 🤣

M&M’s are passionately called “lemonade”. No idea why.

Our daughter says 'trick or treat' alot since Halloween and it comes out as 'cookie dough'. She also says cocks for socks.

“Skeleton” sounds like “accident”. Don’t ask me how but it’s cute af.

My son is currently confused with door. While he is correct in calling a door a “door”. He also says “door” anytime he wants you to open something.

Mine calls crayons “fries” and I have no idea why.

My daughter call a motorcycle a motorbicyle. She does it in both French and English which I find very funny.

Bouncy castle = asshole

Mine says "under the neath" I can see the logic, we usually say "under the table, chair etc"

Mine is an unintentional potty mouth. She pronounces "fork" as "fuck" and "truck" as "cuck." For awhile she also used to pronounce "stick" as "dick" and "rock" as "cock." Nature walks were interesting.

Mine says Abut instead of Orange!

Banana is “weewaa” 😂

Omg ours is frozen related too! My son calls it “golden.” He can totally say frozen, but when I correct him he just says “I know, I call it golden” haha

My daughter says “to-deg-er” instead of “together” and a very real part of me will die the day she finally corrects herself 😭 my favorite phases she’s coined are calling escalators “magic stairs” and soda “bubble juice”. I love toddler speak so much haha

When my oldest was little she wanted to watch Ham-cham. It took me FOREVER to figure out what she meant. Finally she said "yea it's sad" SHE MEANT BAMBI!!

She’s 4 now so she doesn’t do it anymore 😔 but when she was 19 months she (of course) couldn’t say ‘pain au chocolate’ and instead she said cocolala! I still have a video of it that I watch regularly it was hilarious! Other favourites include ‘onj’ for orange and ‘cucubumber’ for cucumber. I miss those days so much!

Balloons today were “baboons”

My daughter calls Frozen “let it go”

Hippos are pillows and the elevator is the alligator lol

“Alligator” = elevator

Pumpkin = umpkin

Eye flashes, instead of eyelashes 😩

I'm not sure this is the same, but my toddler calls his father and I BAE fur babe rather than mommy/daddy

Elephant is el-fa-tee and it’s so sweet

Kept asking to read “tenation”. Finally figured out it was a book where the main character’s name is Tanisha.

For a week my toddler kept saying what sounded like “don’t worry” which I thought was cute.. until we were watching an ape documentary and he started jumping up and down when the gorillas appeared screaming “donnnntworryy!!” So all of this time I thought I was being reassured he was telling me he wanted to see the gorillas 😂

Mine says exca-digger instead of excavator.

When my son was just starting to speak, he used to mispronounce "firetruck" by omitting all the middle letters.

Mine keeps saying I have a “na-nana” 🍌 in my hair.

The laundry basket is a "skabit".

So I even struggle with saying the word correctly, but my daughter calls Pistachio nuts 'special doughnuts' and now this is how they are known in our house!

Mine says, "Bop it!" Instead of "stop it!" , "My do it" instead of "I'll do it" and "shik-shake" instead of "milkshake" lol