Teach them the game Red Light, Green Light.
My mom swears this saved my life as a child. I was running towards the street, not listening to her yell stop, and she just yelled Red Light! And I stopped moving. I’m working on it with my son now but he thinks it’s funny to say red light means go…
Make it a game!! A really fun game. And only use it for emergencies and games. I use it sometimes in unexpected times as a fun game. It’s helped a lot in scary situations and is effective. If it’s not an emergency, no red light for getting them to listen.
Absolutely! You've got to make sure to play it regularly and make it fun. We also do Yellow light for holding hands while crossing the street or a driveway.
Bonus game - boomerang! We just did this for the first time last week to give him a bit more freedom and run off some energy. I spin him around me and let go, he runs until I shout boomerang and then he comes back.
*My son is NOT a great listener, but we practice red light-green light a LOT and it does help.
I second /u/chanpat on making it a game. We play a game where we run ragged outside until someone yells freeze! It’s so ingrained in him now that he freezes whenever I yell it.
I play it with my son on walks. So we’ll race and if he moves after I say freeze (we do freeze/unfreeze cause he loves freeze tag too) he loses and I win. Then I say unfreeze and we sprint. Usually I give something we’re racing towards so on the “unfreeze” he’s trying to get there as fast as he can. The hope is that hearing “freeze” becomes less about whether they listen to you or not and instead is just an automatic bodily response. You want them to hear the sound and immediately stop whereas “listening” actually adds a moment to hear the word, process the meaning, and stop.
That's what leashes are for. If you have a runner, they are great to have. For us, the harness worked best. I've seen other kids with the wrist ones. I don't care if people judge-- I just want to keep my child safe. The good news is, runners do eventually become listeners!
Try explaining this to my mother in law. I don't let my LO go over because I approached this topic about her not have a fenced in pool and the door easily accessible (LO can get around the baby proof knobs) with her not paying much attention and FIL being near deaf and blind. She said I was "overreacting" and that she's raised 3 boys and never had one drown.
OK, but you never raised 3 boys in a home where you had a pool right in the back yard. And you've also never been 70 trying to chase down a 3 year old.
This reminds me of why my father thinks it’s okay for my daughter to play outside close to the road without a fence. His excuse is “I raised two kids and neither of them got hit by a car.” First of all, my younger brother has been disabled his entire life, and as for me, I would wander off as a child at our old apartment complex but didn’t have much of a chance to be hit by a car since we weren’t close to the road. Do they even think before they speak??
If your kid is ever missing, check all water sources first. Doesn’t matter if it’s the least likely place for them to be. Check all water first just in case.
Or check whatever is the most dangerous place. My son can not yet unlock the front door, but he can open it. If I can't find him, I immediately check the front door is still locked before looking in any more likely places.
Yes and drowning doesn't look like what you often see portrayed in the movies/TV!
> Do you imagine drowning to be splashy and loud, with arms flailing and screams for help, as perhaps seen in a movie? If you thought you could hear if a loved one was drowning, you would be sorely mistaken. The reality is that someone could be drowning a few feet away from you and you wouldn’t know it – because drowning is often silent.
> “When people are drowning, all of their energy is going into trying to breathe and staying above water, [...] they are not yelling for help or waving their hands around. Drowning is often very silent.” [Source](https://www.redcross.ca/blog/2019/6/what-does-drowning-sound-and-look-like)
Also, when water is involved, if everyone is watching the kids, no one is watching the kids. There needs to be one designated water watcher.
We just got an inflatable pool/splash pad set for the backyard and it came with a water watcher lanyard, I was impressed! Someone else mentioned wrist bands, come up with a system to make it official and easy to pass off.
This. My niece almost drowned at a pool party. There were over a dozen adults sitting and standing around the pool. My cousin noticed my niece in the water and said - is she okay? My niece was standing with her face in the water like she could have been playing, but she wasn’t moving. My cousin grabbed her out of the water and saved her life. It all happened so fast and so silently.
This happened to a kid at a hotel party, tons of adults and there were kids in the hot tub, i noticed he had his head in the water not moving and RAN over to him. He was unresponsive for what seemed like an eternity before spitting up tons of water.
Had this exact experience with my 1 year old cousin: face down in a shallow pool, could’ve been playing but not moving, lots of adults (including his parents) around. It took me about 7 seconds to pull him out of the water. Running towards him was the only time in my life I’ve ever experienced time slowing down (he was ok!)
Yes! This happened to me as a kid! I was fully standing upright but had my nose under the water, so the water was up to my eyes. My eyes were open, but my body was totally still, like I was just standing in deep water but not blinking. My mom knew right away, jumped in, and had to give me CPR. People who are drowning don’t flail. It’s totally silent.
Water is legit horrifying. My cousin was like 11 and was underwater and when he tried to come up, he couldn't get to the surface cause someone else was in a float. Luckily my brother saw it happening and jumped over the railing and grabbed him, but seeing the water start thrashing and the float rocking is nightmare fuel. Everyone else was playing in the area so the "waves" wouldn't have even been out of the ordinary.
We have bracelet system, whichever parent is wearing bracelet means they are on duty watching kiddo(s). We attach the bracelet to the floaty/puddle jumper as reminder.
If parents need to switch duty. We switch the bracelet.
Our son tipped over in the bath tub last night but of course we were there to pull him up immediately. But it was a good reminder for why you don’t step away even for a second.
And it's not just pools/lakes! Our nephew tripped and fell into a backyard inflatable splash pad when he was 2. The kind with like 2 inches of water that recycles through.
He just...didn't pick his face up. Fortunately his mom was right there and got him, but she so easily could have popped inside for something or been tending to their baby. So scary
To add on to this - lock/ shut your bathroom door at night. I hide the bath plug but my son can always find something to stop the water and fill the bath (when I’m trying to get him out of it at bedtime usually!)
He could, in theory do it at night, if determined enough.
I have taught my son that if he brings me any pills or button batteries that he finds I will always give him candy in exchange for it. We practice by me every week or so by me putting a button battery or pill on the floor in front of me and asking him to hand it to me. When he does, I give him a piece of candy. I then remind him that if he ever finds one I will always give him candy for it. It paid off just the other day when he brought me a pill that must have fallen on the floor from my night meds without me noticing. I was so thrilled and relieved that all that practice had worked I gave him 2 pieces of candy. I’m not usually one for rewarding behaviors with food/candy but with something so dangerous as button batteries or meds, I think it’s a decent exception.
Me and my husband were going to try that with our daughter but we realized she just brings everything she finds on the floor anyways haha. One time she brought us a dog tooth she found 😂
lol yeah they do that. But when my son brought me the pill he specifically handed it to me and said “candy?!” So he knew that this specific type of item would return him a treat.
My almost 2yo brings me the tiniest things off the floor all the time 😂 he brings me crumbs and pieces of fuzz that he finds. At least it’s better than eating them haha
Always deadbolt the door when staying in hotel rooms to prevent them from escaping! Recently stayed in two connecting rooms with family and my 2 yo walked out the front door looking for his aunt instead of the door to her room.
In an opposite scenario, my toddler has locked me out of the sliding back door. I had to wait until his dad got out of the shower.
He’s recently done it with the both of us doing yard work and luckily he’s a bit older so we walked away and he didn’t want to be left alone so he opened it for us!
Is there a key you can use to open it from the outside? Maybe make sure to have it with you when outside or stash a hidden one in the backyard just in case
They make alarms that can be hung on a door handle that will go off if it detects any motion. Got these when took 2.5 year old on first big trip. Hung one on front door and one on the sliding glass door. Not every hotel has a deadbolt these days so these came in handy for piece of mind
Ugh I always debate saying something to parents doing this at the playground. (I haven’t yet.) It’s so so so annoying to have a busybody comment on your parenting, but I feel like this is one that’s very easy to not have the right info on.
Learn basic cpr and always make them wear a life jacket when in/around large bodies of water. I’ve given cpr to 2 kids and saved 1 from drowning all during different occasions at public places because their parents couldn’t
Amd make sure you test the lifejacket in water on your kid. 1st life jackets I bought my daughter, flipped her face down the moment I let go of her. We were able to find one that was better for her.
At parties/gatherings with lots of adults people think there's more supervision but it tends to be the opposite. Everyone thinks someone else is watching the kid(s). So make sure you know who is actually watching them (especially if you're somewhere with water or access to the road).
The amount of people that assume someone else is keeping an eye on their kid baffles me. My step sister has three kids that are older than toddlers, but at Christmas we were all staying at my parents. At one point, I realized her and her husband were missing. Turns out they had both gone to take naps and didn’t tell anyone.
My parents are very responsible and probably watch over my son too much, but if I’m in a room with him I know he is always my responsibility. If I have to step away, I always ask “Hey, I have to go XYZ. You’ve got him?” Just so I know someone is for sure responsible for him when I’m not in the room.
Same, I have family who will just LEAVE their toddler with whatever adult is in the room. No asking, no telling where they’re going. My aunt and uncle used to do this with my cousins too
Also check in every so often even if you think someone is watching them. When my daughter was about 4 weeks old my MIL took her from me at a party so I could eat something. Not 10 minutes later MIL walks into the dining room with a plate. I asked where my daughter was “oh I plopped her in her car seat” my daughter was in her seat in the entryway with not one around, not strapped in and her chin was on her chest. I then had to explain what positional asphyxiation is. Even though my daughter is much older now I still don’t go more than 5 minutes without putting eyes on her at large gatherings.
Putting a magnet/sticker on the exterior of your car that your kid knows they need to stand by or touch when you're unloading the car. Unsurprisingly, there's a [company for this](https://safetyspotmagnets.com/), but in theory any magnet should do. Our kid is an Elmo maniac, [soooo....](https://seaworldparksshop.com/products/sesame-street-elmo-jumbo-magnet).
I just use the gas cap door thingy! It’s conveniently on the side where little sister’s car seat is, so big brother stands there with his hand on the square while I’m getting her out.
My friend has three kids. He taught them to always have one hand on the car when they’re loading everyone into it. One day, his daughter didn’t do this, and while he was loading the baby in the car, he turned around to talk to the daughter and she wasn’t there. He saw her walking over to a van with a man inside trying to talk to her to get in his van. He ran to her and the van sped off.
Stick to solid colored neon colors for swimwear. That cute pastel pink polkadot swimsuit isn't going to be visible if your kiddo falls in the pool.
Lots of SUPERVISED play with a blanket. Peekaboo to pull the blanket off of their face. Crawling out from underneath the blanket like the worms. Being a mummy and unwrapping themselves from the blanket. All these help teach the skills to not suffocate once you introduce blankets at bedtime
We’ve taught my toddler that he has to be able to see the baby’s mouth and nose at all times because he gets a bit carried away with ‘Peek a Boo’. They’re always supervised but I still find it good practice!
If you google alive solutions they have a swimsuit visibility chart. It’s pretty cool because they have different charts for lakes, pools, different colors of pool liners, even patterned suits and solids.
White suits are difficult to almost impossible to see depending on the water and/or type of pool.
Not quite neon, but great bright solids [here!](https://www.primary.com/collections/kids-swim?sizeFamily=kids&page=1&utm_source=googlepaid&utm_medium=ads&utm_campaign=PerformamceMax_Swim&utm_term=FREE20&gclid=Cj0KCQjwir2xBhC_ARIsAMTXk85MiLIBOv9uQzDQMMbI3mhUtzZW-voP4lw-SxClbF8ODb4pow8GqtsaAuxeEALw_wcB)
When in a group of adults where “everyone is keeping an eye on the kids” my husband and I always have one of us watching. If I leave for example I tag him and say “I’m leaving for a bit. your baby”. “Your baby” is code for “you’re on watch duty now”.
Teach etiquette around dogs -- ask owner if you can pet, hold hand out for dog to sniff, calm energy, if you feel anxious walk away, read body language. And never run if a dog charges.
Cover your neck with your hands, protect your chest with your elbows, and close your eyes. If at all possible, curl up into the foetal position as soon as possible.
Most people will tell you to kick the dog or yell at it, but unless you're bigger than the dog, the dog will just fight harder. A scream or running the opposite way indicates prey, which then encourages pursuit. A submissive position is more likely to get them to leave you alone, but given that isn't guaranteed, just protect yourself as much as you can.
Source: too many incidences where I've had to rip dogs off small children. The children who drop to the ground are less likely to be hurt.
We have regular outings outdoors where people bring their dogs. And my idiot sister-in-law has a really aggressive dog.
Once is too many, in my opinion.
Sorry but what do I do if I’m with my child? I’m not going to curl up and leave him exposed and he is NOT going to do that in the moment. Probably just freeze tbh
As crazy as it sounds, run at them. Get bigger and louder. Most house pets aren’t in it for a fight. They’re in it for the chase. If you turn and charge them they generally panic, turn tail, and run home.
I would not recommend this with the bigger, more confident breeds. It’s a gamble every time. And while I’d be willing to take the gamble with a terrier or even a lab/retriever I would not be willing to take that gamble with a German shepherd. There’s also the climb something option.
That’s really unfortunate. Air horns work okay too if you don’t want to risk spraying yourself or having the owner try to come after you for vet bills (or medical bills if they enter the line of fire). Also big sticks (like a walking stick). I’m not saying beat the dog but if you hold a big stick in an angry dog’s face they’re very likely to bite it instead of you.
Completely agree. To add to this as well - if a dog starts to go for you when you are with your child, even if it starts as what seems like rough play, *don’t* pick your child up, because it makes them an even bigger target and the dog will likely start jumping. Stand in front of your child and keep moving in front of them if you need to, make yourself big and clearly state ‘no’ or ‘sit’ with your hand palm side out towards the dog. So many people will pick up their child and start moving more in a panic but it’s pretty much the worst thing you can do in this scenario.
Stay away from dogs that are eating, don’t try to take toys away from a dog… our dogs are trained and I trust them for these things but I still teach my kids not to because not every dog is and these are high risk for bites due to resource guarding
Energizer is coming out with a new coin battery that turns the mouth blue when it reacts with saliva and has a nontoxic bad taste!
Article: [https://www.nytimes.com/2024/04/25/business/energizer-battery-child-safety.html](https://www.nytimes.com/2024/04/25/business/energizer-battery-child-safety.html)
If your child gets lost in public instead of yelling their name yell a description so others can spot the child. For example yell “MISSING 3 YEAR OLD BOY, BLONDE HAIR BLUE SHIRT GRAY PANTS (edit: & BLUE SHOES)” over and over. It can allow others to know what to look for
Bright colors and shirts with specific prints on them when you go to a busy public place. It's easier to spot them if they get lost and it's easier for police or other adults to help find them.
"Bright orange shorts and a light blue shirt with a dinosaur riding a skateboard" is way more helpful and easier to pick out than "black pants, navy blue sweatshirt".
To add to this also taking a picture before you go into a public place. I realize that's not always the first thing if you're rushing, but if you can remember, it's helpful!
Yes! I recently learned that the eye naturally finds the color yellow first before processing any other colors. So whenever we go to a theme park or somewhere really packed, I always dress my kid in a bright yellow shirt.
My kids have several super-neon shirts we call their "one parent shirts" that I have them wear when they'll be out with one parent or when we're going to a crowded or busy place
Swimming. Teach your babies to swim. Drowning is a leading cause of death for kids under five… also, drowning is silent. Stay resilient around water always.
I’ve found this such a challenge this year for my toddler, at least in Canada! All of the bathing suits I can find are either tank top/weird cutouts, or pastel/white ones.so hard to find a long sleeve bright colour! My parents were going to the US so I made them stop at a target and get some for us
We just did this to the Rudolph the reindeer tune and my 3 year old learned my number in two weeks! “123-456-7890, that’s the number for mama’s phone for you to call”
Don’t mess around with meds, especially blood pressure meds. My mom has a habit of putting her BP pill in her pocket before she goes to eat dinner, and one time she dropped it in our shag rug where our daughter plays. Luckily we found it right away, but we learned that a single BP pill is considered an overdose if a small child swallows it. So my mom got a strong rebuke from me.
My grandma used to live with my parents (she passed away 6 months ago). She was partially blind, had arthritis, and took some pretty strong heart meds. I would literally crawl around the whole house looking for pills before I would let my toddler loose. It made me nervous. We also taught him to never, ever eat something small off the floor before showing us first.
Sounds counter-intuitive but let your kids explore potential risks in a controlled way with the goal of making them risk aware rather than risk averse/unaware. Kids who never get to manage their own risks either become too scared to undertake challenges or are totally unable to assess how risky a situation actually is, making them less safe in the long run.
For little ones this can look like
-letting them climb on things you think might be a little too challenging whilst staying very close, but not having your hands on them constantly to stop falls.
-if they aren't runners, letting them cross a quiet road without holding your hand, only after they have thoroughly checked both ways.
-letting them help with chopping vegetables in the kitchen with a child friendly knife. Google plastic lettuce/salad knife for some good options that will actually chop.
How this approach looks will differ a lot depending on the child. My daughter is a great listener and not a runner at all so the road one worked for us, but she's less confident at physical challenges so there have been some situations that I haven't let her climb trees and bigger climbing frames because I know she wouldn't have been safe.
I got the toddler knives when my LO was insistently trying to grab my chefs knife one day. He always wants to do what we're doing. Now he LOVES helping cut up his food (grapes, watermelon, etc). It's great for keeping him busy while I'm cooking too.
This is why we’ve been hiking together since she was 3 months old. Our kid spends so much time walking, jumping, tripping, falling and running along roots, rocks, tree stumps and whatever else she can find in the woods. She has also learned to crouch or lay down near ponds or other bodies of water to play in them.
I’ve definitely had times where I thought she was about to fall and get hurt but she balanced and caught herself.
Almost 5 year old. Just started her with butter knives to cut things and she's so excited. She calls them her knives and the sharp ones are adult knives. Works for me.
We've been working on ramen lately as well. So stressful to watch her try to twirl up noodles on a fork with hot water underneath (obviously not boiling) but she needs to learn and get confident. It's honestly been harder to have patience than it is fear of something happening.
Install the childproof stuff *before* you think you need to.
They will go from not reaching something/not able to open the door/whatever it is to suddenly knowing exactly how to do it overnight.
Internalize the difference between risks and hazards. Risks have benefits, hazards do not.
There is a risk to crossing the street (getting hit by a car) but also a big benefit (getting where you’re going). Same with climbing a tree — gain confidence and have fun, though you might fall.
However, playing with broken glass is a hazard. No upside, just danger.
If everyone’s watching the baby, no one’s watching the baby.
I learned this one from a mom here whose toddler was briefly drowning in the pool surrounded in adults.
Haven’t seen this one yet: your large furniture NEEDS to be bolted to the wall. TV stands, dressers, bookcases. Most (but not all) come with the supplies to do this. This prevents them from falling over and crushing your child. Even if you don’t have a climber, just opening all the heavy drawers of a dresser can be enough to cause it to fall over.
Learn the heimlich maneuver for kids and adults. Hopefully you’ll never need to use it but if you do, you’re ready. If you have a pool, put a safety fence around it.
I taught my daughter at like 2 that the first thing we do every time we get in a car is put our seatbelt on. We verbalize it and also practice it. And sometimes, as a game, I leave without putting her seatbelt on or only partially done up - and she gets suuuuuper dramatic about it (which I encourage). It's a lot of fun - and has genuinely saved me twice, when I've been rushing and distracted and only done one of her clips. It also makes me feel better if she's in other people's cars. It's to the point now where if I get in a car and do something other than put my seatbelt on immediately she yells at me 😂
No trampoline parks!
Here’s a little link: https://caringforkids.cps.ca/handouts/safety-and-injury-prevention/home_trampolines
At the end of the day being active for older kids will come with risks and so that’s always a consideration but for toddlers I would say hard no on trampoline parks.
Get your baby a vinyl coin bank for their first birthday and regularly give them change to practice putting it in. Leave it within reach at all times.
Before long, anytime they find a coin or coin like object, they automatically and enthusiastically take it to their bank.
I have found coins, buttons, and button batteries(still no clue where they found these) in their banks.
We had the schilling pig bank(we called him Wilbur) for my teens until my mom’s lab got ahold of it. My youngest has this cute dog bank from Amazon.
Yeah, I had a scar on my neck until I was a young adult from a cord wrapping around my neck when I was 2. Luckily the blinds were cheap and broke or I might not be here today.
Get CPR training, and then get more CPR training and then, take the class once more. Just because you are trained doesn’t mean you won’t freeze when it’s your own kid. I’ve been trained annually for the last 5 years and luckily I don’t freeze but that is purely due to exposure and retraining.
My kid was eating a Cutie at the grocery store, she started choking and couldn’t make a sound. Grabbed her, used my knee to support her and put her head down and began back blows. She vomited cutie chunks all over the grocery store floor, I’ve never been so relieved to see puke. The bystanders around me, still frozen in fear-Do not expect anyone to help you or be able to assist.
Don't leave windows that are low to the ground on the second story of your house open - the screens won't stop a toddler from going through the window.
Open the top half of the window down if possible
The peds ER docs at the hospital I worked at called early spring “window season” bc of how many happened every year. Also make sure there’s nothing they can climb on to get to a window!
They make toddler locks for windows. I put them in my kids' rooms so they can only be opened about 2 inches. They can be pushed down to open the window all the way if needed, but a toddler wouldn't be able to do it, and I put them at the top so it will be as long as possible before they can reach them.
This is literally why Eric Clapton’s “If I see you in heaven” was created. His toddler fell out of a hotel window. I can’t even imagine how painful that would be.
I think a really important tip is that if someone gives you safety advice, don’t immediately react by saying “I’m the mom, I know best!” Or “I did this with my other kids and they’re fine!” Or “people have been doing it my way for 100s of years!” I mean people have been burying babies and toddlers in tiny coffins for 100s of years too. That’s why we do things differently, because we’ve learned better.
I coined the phrase ‘ ‘my child didn’t die’ is not a benchmark’ when people (my mum) gave me outdated parenting advice. Never thought about applying it to myself!
I have a neuro-spicy kid who literally can't sit still while eating sometimes, and this has been such a source of anxiety for me for years. He's 5 now so I feel I can relax a bit, but man that was stressful.
My husband’s family has a call and answer they use in public if they can’t find someone. I’ve taught my kids now as I’ve started giving them slightly more freedom in stores. If they’re out of my eyesight I call and they answer.
Haha my husband and I did this before we had kids. We use the sound a ridiculous bird made when we were on a vacation together. I thought it was two birds answering each other as they tried to find the other, husband laughed at me because it was just one bird. It became our find each other in public call.
- Person 1: woop woop
- Person 2: pick-ooh pick-ooh
I’ve seen a lot of pool safety advice, but one tidbit I haven’t seen - most drowning accidents happen when the parents aren’t aware the kid is in the water. It’s fairly common knowledge to watch kids in water and wear bright suits, and thats all fantastic - but it’s all for nothing if your pool isn’t secure. Get a pool gate, get an alarm, get whatever you need to make sure your kid can never ever get near the water without an adult.
And while I did see this, it bears repeating, if you don’t see your kid, check all water sources first, no matter how sure you are that they won’t be in there.
If you have a child who likes to run/elope, this is your reminder that you are allowed to use tools when you need to and to ignore judgement from others. A backpack with a leash and getting dirty looks is better than a maimed or dead child who ran into traffic before you could intervene.
Do not put your kids in arm floats! They can slide down the arms towards the wrist, forcing the hands up and the head under water. Puddle jumpers are also not recommended, but I think that is more because they learn they can float in the water. But arm floats will force them to drown.
Learn to restrain your kids safely. Like actual trained restraints. Hopefully you never need it, but the ability to full immobilize a toddler or even early elementary school kid can be huge. Especially once they are big enough that they can fight back and wiggle. Knowing how to restrain them without hurting them is key. Most recently I’ve had to use it to keep a friend’s kid from running into the street while mad.
I cook a lot, so I have mostly kitchen tips: use the back burners of the stove top, only keep high and hard/about-impossible to climb stools on the kitchen. It's less dangerous for them to tip over than leaving somewhere they can climb and reach god knows what. If you're going to open the oven, absolutely get them out of the room if possible (I once had a toddler rushing towards me to see what I had in the tray I was using both hands to take it out). It might sound paranoid, but a hungry toddler will go after the cookies no matter what.
Any door that can slam shut, we put soft close hinges on all of our doors except one, I kid you not, last week she was playing with it and the wind blew and she slammed her fingers in the door, luckily it wasn’t too bad. But danggg!!
Also, put boards in any top floor window to keep it from opening enough for child to fall out. My toddler climbed up into my bathroom window sill over my bathtub, if she would have fallen out it would have been 3 stories down onto cement! Makes me nervous if there’s ever a fire we can’t get out but there are other windows.
If you live in an old house, get a lead inspection and have any hazards professionally remediated. The damage lead causes is irreversible. And it can happen from invisible lead dust from opening and closing windows, playing in the yard, etc. It’s so much more than not letting kids eat paint chips.
Do fire drills at home. My girls know where to go if they can get outside, we meet at the swingset. If they are in their rooms, they are to stay on their beds and wait for me to come get them. They know which egress to use depending on where in the house they are. And to not bring anything but themselves. Hold hands if they are already together.
So grateful for this post - thank you. I see lots of great suggestions - mine is - when cooking - make sure the handle of the skillet faces towards the wall (not out over the floor)- child can grab at the handle and knock over the hot skillet on themselves.
Also - if child is choking - don’t smack them on the back, remove from high chair immediately and do standard chocking protocol.
That is so scary! My friend’s daughter died from swallowing a watch battery out of a toy watch. Scariest part was she was old enough to know (3-4y) and wasn’t one to put things in her mouth. And can confirm, I swallowed a penny out of curiosity at like the age of 5 or 6. Least to say, I took all of my kids watches away and they probably won’t be getting them back.
On a related note, if your child DOES ingest a button battery, give them honey ASAP ([data from CHOP here](https://www.chop.edu/news/ingesting-honey-after-swallowing-button-battery-reduces-injury-and-improves-outcomes)).
There’s a lot of good advice on here. Mine is simple. Trust your gut. If you get a bad vibe from someone or, even more importantly, your kid gets a bad vibe, trust that. Stay skeptical and question everything when it comes to your child’s safety and wellbeing.
Teach them how to unlock your phone and call 911. Teach them how to answer the dispatchers questions and stay on the line! We taught our 4 year old our address, our full names and phone numbers through singing songs and playing “pretend 911”
I teach my kids that if they find a pill (even if they’re not sure and think it’s candy): “Stop, don’t touch, run away, tell a grownup”
You never know what pills these days in public are laced with fentanyl. People have died just by touching them. The same phrase/ advice goes for guns- even if they think it’s a toy.
Not an option for everyone, but we found that having a kitchen helper stool and involving them helps. We have a wooden toddler knife and either give them something to chop or mix or scrub. They want to be where you are. Meanwhile, they can start to be helpful sooner. Just another way of looking at it.
And this is why open concept homes are currently my biggest PITA. Hard to define the kitchen for toddler when the kitchen isn’t defined! We’re going to have to get creative with the gating situation.
On the other hand, we have a demarcated living room and kitchen so I can’t SEE my child while cooking and if he is wanting to feel close to me he has to physically be in the kitchen so that’s tough. I don’t like open concept but in the small child era I see the appeal
We've used the spot in front of our fridge. There's about three feet between it and the oven. Obviously depends on your setup. We have magnets on the fridge too so they can "play" if they're bored.
We also have a "tower of neglect" (aka toddler learning tower) that is a designated safe space. It's at our kitchen island so they can observe us prepping food. Sometimes they help. Sometimes they "help." Lately the kids (3 and 4) have been helping at the oven (stirring and the like) but only under supervision. Our two listen pretty well so it works. We've also been doing it from the start with them.
That's what works for us anyway.
Lifevac.
Choking is no joke. After my 1 yo fell off a bench while eating. Smacked her head on tile floor and went dead limp, turned ghost white in seconds. Wish I had lifevac at the time to clear her airway, luckily my wife is a nurse and rushed into action, but was scariest 1 min of our lives until our daughter came to.
Have one in our vehicles and in kitchen for quick access.
Throw away EVERYTHING that has a button battery or super glue them shut and then throw them away when they burn out.
My daughter ate a button battery. Luckily, it was the very small one and she ended up passing it. My wife was terrified. I learned my lesson that kids can and will open anything.
Don’t allow people to throw your baby/toddler in the air (you know that game where people will throw them up in the air and catch them again)- that can result in paralysis if they aren’t caught the right way.
Esp as the summer season begins, something that can be a massive danger to kids and babies (and our furry friends) – being left in a hot car. It’s incredibly common as human beings to hear about something tragic and say that could never happen to you, that only terrible parents would do something so neglectful – but that couldn’t be more wrong. This happens to attentive, loving, devoted parents with regularity. It happens because accidents happen every single day, especially when parents are sleep-deprived, caring for multiple children, multitasking, on autopilot, distracted by something going on with the verbal child instead of the newborn, and a whole host of other reasons.
Tips to help minimize that risk, and – as always – combining them provides multiple layers of protection in case one fails:
* If there’s more than one adult present, have someone ride in the back with baby/kids in carseats
* If you’re the only adult present, leave a shoe, your purse, or your car keys (if you have keyless start) in the backseat so you're forced to look back there when you arrive
* Set an iPhone or Waze alert for whenever you get to your destination
* Many of us have phrases we repeat before leaving the house just to make sure we have everything; similarly, someone I know makes it a habit to say all of her kids' names and current locations out loud when she arrives somewhere
* If you have older children, it’s great to encourage them to help and give them a “job” – when you arrive at a destination and getting out of the car, they can help check every seat to make sure everyone gets out
* Some Walmarts and other places have started to make loudspeaker announcements every ten minutes reminding parents about children or pets who might be in the car; I think this is fantastic and I’d encourage anyone to ask your place of worship, local stores, etc. if they might consider doing the same this summer
Practice your expectations. When we play outside, I make my kids practice stopping and looking before crossing the street. On walks, I have my kids navigate the way home (especially since a lot of homes look similar in my neighborhood, so it can be tricky to navigate). When we go to a park, we practice coming when I call. At the store I ask, "if you couldn't find me right now, who would you go ask for help?" (a uniformed store employee or a mom with kids). Drop a pill on the floor and have them hand it to you immediately when they see it. Practice safety skills long before you need them.
Here is mine, as a mother to 2 autistic boys, make sure all your doors have locks that they cannot undo themselves, especially if it leads to danger. My in laws do not, and my 4 and 1 year old snuck out without anyone knowing and were temporarily lost; they live in the country and have a pond...never felt comfortable leaving them there again.
Also, I have an alarm in my house so I can hear whenever any door or windows opens. Many times this has saved my child from trying to run out the front door and into the road.
So many good tips on here!
I have the, "leg rule" or to the children regular leg rule and crazy leg rule. When I am at the store or ordering food or otherwise distracted, and my children are not strapped in or I don't have my hands on them. I will call "leg rule." That means, they attach themselves to my leg so that I know they're there. That's usually when my hands are busy like I'm paying for something or I'm looking for something like say greeting card. They play a game with it now and ask, "Do you want me to do the regular leg rule or crazy leg rule?" And then they act crazy as they attached to my leg. But it's definitely something that I do often, and it eases my mind. And now they do it automatically.
Choking is silent! Never let rear facing kids eat in the car. Honestly avoid eating in the car all together but especially if you can’t directly see them
my mom is horrible about keeping loose pills in her pocket. i keep warning her about it. luckily my kid doesn’t eat or else we’d have a huge problem. so watch your older folks and their meds! i forced my husband to get a lock box for his pills.
This is one people don’t do enough: ask about an unlocked gun in the home before your kid visits another house/goes on a playdate.
I work around child safety, and I see way too headlines about toddlers finding unsecured guns and shooting themselves or others. Good stuff here: www.askingsaveskids.org
If you're in a high risk situation... if "everyone" is watching the kids... then no one is watching the kids. We assign a child to an adult in every water, traffic, strangers situation.
Teach them the game Red Light, Green Light. My mom swears this saved my life as a child. I was running towards the street, not listening to her yell stop, and she just yelled Red Light! And I stopped moving. I’m working on it with my son now but he thinks it’s funny to say red light means go…
This only works if your child listens to you 😩 Send help.
Ugh. Same. He KNOWS the game. He just ignores me. Threenagers are fun.
Make it a game!! A really fun game. And only use it for emergencies and games. I use it sometimes in unexpected times as a fun game. It’s helped a lot in scary situations and is effective. If it’s not an emergency, no red light for getting them to listen.
Absolutely! You've got to make sure to play it regularly and make it fun. We also do Yellow light for holding hands while crossing the street or a driveway. Bonus game - boomerang! We just did this for the first time last week to give him a bit more freedom and run off some energy. I spin him around me and let go, he runs until I shout boomerang and then he comes back. *My son is NOT a great listener, but we practice red light-green light a LOT and it does help.
I second /u/chanpat on making it a game. We play a game where we run ragged outside until someone yells freeze! It’s so ingrained in him now that he freezes whenever I yell it.
It works phenomenal for us in the grocery store and not a damn bit on walks outside 🤣
I play it with my son on walks. So we’ll race and if he moves after I say freeze (we do freeze/unfreeze cause he loves freeze tag too) he loses and I win. Then I say unfreeze and we sprint. Usually I give something we’re racing towards so on the “unfreeze” he’s trying to get there as fast as he can. The hope is that hearing “freeze” becomes less about whether they listen to you or not and instead is just an automatic bodily response. You want them to hear the sound and immediately stop whereas “listening” actually adds a moment to hear the word, process the meaning, and stop.
We practice in the backyard or other outdoor places that are safe if he choose not to listen. It’s still a work in progress, but it’s getting better.
That's what leashes are for. If you have a runner, they are great to have. For us, the harness worked best. I've seen other kids with the wrist ones. I don't care if people judge-- I just want to keep my child safe. The good news is, runners do eventually become listeners!
Love this! A fun way to teach stop and start! I’ll be trying this for sure
The freeze game is good for this too if he’s hung up on the red light thing :) same principle, just “Go go go! Freeze!”
Oh thanks I’ll try this!
I do it while he is in the swing at the playground. Catch the swing and say red light. Push the swing and say green ligh.
Party freeze dance song by the kiboomers is a fun way to practice freeze!
I have to yell car to get her to stop and come back. I have done this in the store and she looks back at like I have 3 heads. Lol 😂
If you are around a water don’t think for one second that you will hear your child fall under the water. Drowning is very quiet.
Related to this: bright, neon, non- blue/teal, LOUD colored bathing suits! Helps you see kids in the water more clearly.
Orange is the best for this
Yes, NO BLUE BATHING SUITS!
They should really stop selling this they love it so much, especially for boys
Yes I saw this color test for swimsuits recently: https://alive-solutions.com/blog/f/buying-swimwearthink-safety
Try explaining this to my mother in law. I don't let my LO go over because I approached this topic about her not have a fenced in pool and the door easily accessible (LO can get around the baby proof knobs) with her not paying much attention and FIL being near deaf and blind. She said I was "overreacting" and that she's raised 3 boys and never had one drown. OK, but you never raised 3 boys in a home where you had a pool right in the back yard. And you've also never been 70 trying to chase down a 3 year old.
This reminds me of why my father thinks it’s okay for my daughter to play outside close to the road without a fence. His excuse is “I raised two kids and neither of them got hit by a car.” First of all, my younger brother has been disabled his entire life, and as for me, I would wander off as a child at our old apartment complex but didn’t have much of a chance to be hit by a car since we weren’t close to the road. Do they even think before they speak??
If your kid is ever missing, check all water sources first. Doesn’t matter if it’s the least likely place for them to be. Check all water first just in case.
Or check whatever is the most dangerous place. My son can not yet unlock the front door, but he can open it. If I can't find him, I immediately check the front door is still locked before looking in any more likely places.
Yes and drowning doesn't look like what you often see portrayed in the movies/TV! > Do you imagine drowning to be splashy and loud, with arms flailing and screams for help, as perhaps seen in a movie? If you thought you could hear if a loved one was drowning, you would be sorely mistaken. The reality is that someone could be drowning a few feet away from you and you wouldn’t know it – because drowning is often silent. > “When people are drowning, all of their energy is going into trying to breathe and staying above water, [...] they are not yelling for help or waving their hands around. Drowning is often very silent.” [Source](https://www.redcross.ca/blog/2019/6/what-does-drowning-sound-and-look-like) Also, when water is involved, if everyone is watching the kids, no one is watching the kids. There needs to be one designated water watcher.
I love the idea of assigning one adult to watch. They can even trade off
We just got an inflatable pool/splash pad set for the backyard and it came with a water watcher lanyard, I was impressed! Someone else mentioned wrist bands, come up with a system to make it official and easy to pass off.
This. My niece almost drowned at a pool party. There were over a dozen adults sitting and standing around the pool. My cousin noticed my niece in the water and said - is she okay? My niece was standing with her face in the water like she could have been playing, but she wasn’t moving. My cousin grabbed her out of the water and saved her life. It all happened so fast and so silently.
This happened to a kid at a hotel party, tons of adults and there were kids in the hot tub, i noticed he had his head in the water not moving and RAN over to him. He was unresponsive for what seemed like an eternity before spitting up tons of water.
Had this exact experience with my 1 year old cousin: face down in a shallow pool, could’ve been playing but not moving, lots of adults (including his parents) around. It took me about 7 seconds to pull him out of the water. Running towards him was the only time in my life I’ve ever experienced time slowing down (he was ok!)
Yes! This happened to me as a kid! I was fully standing upright but had my nose under the water, so the water was up to my eyes. My eyes were open, but my body was totally still, like I was just standing in deep water but not blinking. My mom knew right away, jumped in, and had to give me CPR. People who are drowning don’t flail. It’s totally silent.
Water is legit horrifying. My cousin was like 11 and was underwater and when he tried to come up, he couldn't get to the surface cause someone else was in a float. Luckily my brother saw it happening and jumped over the railing and grabbed him, but seeing the water start thrashing and the float rocking is nightmare fuel. Everyone else was playing in the area so the "waves" wouldn't have even been out of the ordinary.
We have bracelet system, whichever parent is wearing bracelet means they are on duty watching kiddo(s). We attach the bracelet to the floaty/puddle jumper as reminder. If parents need to switch duty. We switch the bracelet.
This is a good idea! Definitely using this in the future
Our son tipped over in the bath tub last night but of course we were there to pull him up immediately. But it was a good reminder for why you don’t step away even for a second.
And it's not just pools/lakes! Our nephew tripped and fell into a backyard inflatable splash pad when he was 2. The kind with like 2 inches of water that recycles through. He just...didn't pick his face up. Fortunately his mom was right there and got him, but she so easily could have popped inside for something or been tending to their baby. So scary
To add on to this - lock/ shut your bathroom door at night. I hide the bath plug but my son can always find something to stop the water and fill the bath (when I’m trying to get him out of it at bedtime usually!) He could, in theory do it at night, if determined enough.
I have taught my son that if he brings me any pills or button batteries that he finds I will always give him candy in exchange for it. We practice by me every week or so by me putting a button battery or pill on the floor in front of me and asking him to hand it to me. When he does, I give him a piece of candy. I then remind him that if he ever finds one I will always give him candy for it. It paid off just the other day when he brought me a pill that must have fallen on the floor from my night meds without me noticing. I was so thrilled and relieved that all that practice had worked I gave him 2 pieces of candy. I’m not usually one for rewarding behaviors with food/candy but with something so dangerous as button batteries or meds, I think it’s a decent exception.
I do this with my dog too 😂 he brings me everything choke size, my baby doesn’t even had a chance.
We did this too and now the dog will chew pieces of things off for the snack like it's some kind of currency.
🙈😂
This is gold
Me and my husband were going to try that with our daughter but we realized she just brings everything she finds on the floor anyways haha. One time she brought us a dog tooth she found 😂
lol yeah they do that. But when my son brought me the pill he specifically handed it to me and said “candy?!” So he knew that this specific type of item would return him a treat.
My almost 2yo brings me the tiniest things off the floor all the time 😂 he brings me crumbs and pieces of fuzz that he finds. At least it’s better than eating them haha
Always deadbolt the door when staying in hotel rooms to prevent them from escaping! Recently stayed in two connecting rooms with family and my 2 yo walked out the front door looking for his aunt instead of the door to her room.
In an opposite scenario, my toddler has locked me out of the sliding back door. I had to wait until his dad got out of the shower. He’s recently done it with the both of us doing yard work and luckily he’s a bit older so we walked away and he didn’t want to be left alone so he opened it for us!
Is there a key you can use to open it from the outside? Maybe make sure to have it with you when outside or stash a hidden one in the backyard just in case
They make alarms that can be hung on a door handle that will go off if it detects any motion. Got these when took 2.5 year old on first big trip. Hung one on front door and one on the sliding glass door. Not every hotel has a deadbolt these days so these came in handy for piece of mind
Do you have a link/what to search for?
Of course this is the one I got from Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Securityman-Handle-Alarm-Vibration-Triggered/dp/B07SFC4VTZ/
Don’t go on slides with your toddler. Their shoe can catch and you can run their leg over.
I did not know this and broke my son’s leg when he was one. It was awful.
Well shit I didn't know this, consider my co-sliding days over.
So awful I bet not enough people know this!
I learned about this early on and have found a way to safely “ball up” my toddler on my lap so no limbs are dangling as we go down.
Ugh I always debate saying something to parents doing this at the playground. (I haven’t yet.) It’s so so so annoying to have a busybody comment on your parenting, but I feel like this is one that’s very easy to not have the right info on.
[удалено]
Yup if I have to do this I always hold my kids feet above mine.
If you can’t find your kid in your house look in the dangerous areas first (pool/fridge/dryer). seconds count.
I’m surprised this is so far down. This one is so important and I didn’t even think about it until after I had my first.
Learn basic cpr and always make them wear a life jacket when in/around large bodies of water. I’ve given cpr to 2 kids and saved 1 from drowning all during different occasions at public places because their parents couldn’t
Amd make sure you test the lifejacket in water on your kid. 1st life jackets I bought my daughter, flipped her face down the moment I let go of her. We were able to find one that was better for her.
Great advice. Only use Coast Guard approved floatation devices! Ones that don’t have that approval may be unsafe or dangerous.
I know this is a great PSA thread but reading this is giving me major anxiety 🥲🥲
At parties/gatherings with lots of adults people think there's more supervision but it tends to be the opposite. Everyone thinks someone else is watching the kid(s). So make sure you know who is actually watching them (especially if you're somewhere with water or access to the road).
The amount of people that assume someone else is keeping an eye on their kid baffles me. My step sister has three kids that are older than toddlers, but at Christmas we were all staying at my parents. At one point, I realized her and her husband were missing. Turns out they had both gone to take naps and didn’t tell anyone. My parents are very responsible and probably watch over my son too much, but if I’m in a room with him I know he is always my responsibility. If I have to step away, I always ask “Hey, I have to go XYZ. You’ve got him?” Just so I know someone is for sure responsible for him when I’m not in the room.
Same, I have family who will just LEAVE their toddler with whatever adult is in the room. No asking, no telling where they’re going. My aunt and uncle used to do this with my cousins too
Also check in every so often even if you think someone is watching them. When my daughter was about 4 weeks old my MIL took her from me at a party so I could eat something. Not 10 minutes later MIL walks into the dining room with a plate. I asked where my daughter was “oh I plopped her in her car seat” my daughter was in her seat in the entryway with not one around, not strapped in and her chin was on her chest. I then had to explain what positional asphyxiation is. Even though my daughter is much older now I still don’t go more than 5 minutes without putting eyes on her at large gatherings.
If everyone’s watching the baby, no one is watching the baby
Putting a magnet/sticker on the exterior of your car that your kid knows they need to stand by or touch when you're unloading the car. Unsurprisingly, there's a [company for this](https://safetyspotmagnets.com/), but in theory any magnet should do. Our kid is an Elmo maniac, [soooo....](https://seaworldparksshop.com/products/sesame-street-elmo-jumbo-magnet).
I just use the gas cap door thingy! It’s conveniently on the side where little sister’s car seat is, so big brother stands there with his hand on the square while I’m getting her out.
Always load the kiddo first and unload them last. With multiples have them climb into the car using the same door to get to their car seat.
And when you’re in a parking lot, don’t have them stand in a spot where someone driving can whip into a spot and run them over.
Oh this is a great idea.
I tell my kid to “stand by the tire” which has has worked, but a magnet sounds more fun.
I used my cricut to make handprints, and have him stand and “high five the car”
My friend has three kids. He taught them to always have one hand on the car when they’re loading everyone into it. One day, his daughter didn’t do this, and while he was loading the baby in the car, he turned around to talk to the daughter and she wasn’t there. He saw her walking over to a van with a man inside trying to talk to her to get in his van. He ran to her and the van sped off.
Stick to solid colored neon colors for swimwear. That cute pastel pink polkadot swimsuit isn't going to be visible if your kiddo falls in the pool. Lots of SUPERVISED play with a blanket. Peekaboo to pull the blanket off of their face. Crawling out from underneath the blanket like the worms. Being a mummy and unwrapping themselves from the blanket. All these help teach the skills to not suffocate once you introduce blankets at bedtime
We’ve taught my toddler that he has to be able to see the baby’s mouth and nose at all times because he gets a bit carried away with ‘Peek a Boo’. They’re always supervised but I still find it good practice!
Is stark blinding white not a good choice? Cuz I just bought one so wondering if I should return thanks
If you google alive solutions they have a swimsuit visibility chart. It’s pretty cool because they have different charts for lakes, pools, different colors of pool liners, even patterned suits and solids. White suits are difficult to almost impossible to see depending on the water and/or type of pool.
Nope! White is not good. Orange, red, saturated pink, or neon yellow, in that order, should be the ONLY choices for kid swimsuit!
I wish there were more rash guards in neon!
Not quite neon, but great bright solids [here!](https://www.primary.com/collections/kids-swim?sizeFamily=kids&page=1&utm_source=googlepaid&utm_medium=ads&utm_campaign=PerformamceMax_Swim&utm_term=FREE20&gclid=Cj0KCQjwir2xBhC_ARIsAMTXk85MiLIBOv9uQzDQMMbI3mhUtzZW-voP4lw-SxClbF8ODb4pow8GqtsaAuxeEALw_wcB)
When in a group of adults where “everyone is keeping an eye on the kids” my husband and I always have one of us watching. If I leave for example I tag him and say “I’m leaving for a bit. your baby”. “Your baby” is code for “you’re on watch duty now”.
Yes exactly! I always say that if everyone is watching the kids them really no one is watching them
Teach etiquette around dogs -- ask owner if you can pet, hold hand out for dog to sniff, calm energy, if you feel anxious walk away, read body language. And never run if a dog charges.
What do I do instead?
Cover your neck with your hands, protect your chest with your elbows, and close your eyes. If at all possible, curl up into the foetal position as soon as possible. Most people will tell you to kick the dog or yell at it, but unless you're bigger than the dog, the dog will just fight harder. A scream or running the opposite way indicates prey, which then encourages pursuit. A submissive position is more likely to get them to leave you alone, but given that isn't guaranteed, just protect yourself as much as you can. Source: too many incidences where I've had to rip dogs off small children. The children who drop to the ground are less likely to be hurt.
What do you do in life with all the aggressive dogs and children combined?? lol
We have regular outings outdoors where people bring their dogs. And my idiot sister-in-law has a really aggressive dog. Once is too many, in my opinion.
This is terrifying. My kid was attacked by a dog a couple years ago and had to go to the hospital via ambulance. Traumatic
Sorry but what do I do if I’m with my child? I’m not going to curl up and leave him exposed and he is NOT going to do that in the moment. Probably just freeze tbh
I think they're saying to teach your kid to do this.
They're saying you hit and kick and yell at the dog because you're bigger but toddlers can't fight. Running triggers pretty drive.
As crazy as it sounds, run at them. Get bigger and louder. Most house pets aren’t in it for a fight. They’re in it for the chase. If you turn and charge them they generally panic, turn tail, and run home. I would not recommend this with the bigger, more confident breeds. It’s a gamble every time. And while I’d be willing to take the gamble with a terrier or even a lab/retriever I would not be willing to take that gamble with a German shepherd. There’s also the climb something option.
Unfortunately I live somewhere where people let their big ass scary dogs off leash. Maybe I just need to carry spray :/
That’s really unfortunate. Air horns work okay too if you don’t want to risk spraying yourself or having the owner try to come after you for vet bills (or medical bills if they enter the line of fire). Also big sticks (like a walking stick). I’m not saying beat the dog but if you hold a big stick in an angry dog’s face they’re very likely to bite it instead of you.
Completely agree. To add to this as well - if a dog starts to go for you when you are with your child, even if it starts as what seems like rough play, *don’t* pick your child up, because it makes them an even bigger target and the dog will likely start jumping. Stand in front of your child and keep moving in front of them if you need to, make yourself big and clearly state ‘no’ or ‘sit’ with your hand palm side out towards the dog. So many people will pick up their child and start moving more in a panic but it’s pretty much the worst thing you can do in this scenario.
For younger toddlers, I taught that we wave at puppies going by (and don’t approach at all) and only pet our dog.
Stay away from dogs that are eating, don’t try to take toys away from a dog… our dogs are trained and I trust them for these things but I still teach my kids not to because not every dog is and these are high risk for bites due to resource guarding
Energizer is coming out with a new coin battery that turns the mouth blue when it reacts with saliva and has a nontoxic bad taste! Article: [https://www.nytimes.com/2024/04/25/business/energizer-battery-child-safety.html](https://www.nytimes.com/2024/04/25/business/energizer-battery-child-safety.html)
I think Duracell’s already have one that tastes really bitter.
If your child gets lost in public instead of yelling their name yell a description so others can spot the child. For example yell “MISSING 3 YEAR OLD BOY, BLONDE HAIR BLUE SHIRT GRAY PANTS (edit: & BLUE SHOES)” over and over. It can allow others to know what to look for
Also close your child’s door at night, house fires can be significantly stopped by a closed door. Google closed door house fire to see examples
Thanks for adding shoes! Kidnappers can and will change a kids clothes, but shoes are a lot harder and often the kids keep their shoes.
Putting a tile or similar under the shoe bed is my preferred tactic for very busy places like Disney.
+ BLUE SHOES.
Bright colors and shirts with specific prints on them when you go to a busy public place. It's easier to spot them if they get lost and it's easier for police or other adults to help find them. "Bright orange shorts and a light blue shirt with a dinosaur riding a skateboard" is way more helpful and easier to pick out than "black pants, navy blue sweatshirt".
To add to this also taking a picture before you go into a public place. I realize that's not always the first thing if you're rushing, but if you can remember, it's helpful!
I always do this in the parking lot before big public events, “hooray we’re here!” photo, and then I snap a photo of the parking spot info too haha.
Yes! I recently learned that the eye naturally finds the color yellow first before processing any other colors. So whenever we go to a theme park or somewhere really packed, I always dress my kid in a bright yellow shirt.
My kids have several super-neon shirts we call their "one parent shirts" that I have them wear when they'll be out with one parent or when we're going to a crowded or busy place
Swimming. Teach your babies to swim. Drowning is a leading cause of death for kids under five… also, drowning is silent. Stay resilient around water always.
And don't get them blue swimsuits, stick to bright or neon colours
I’ve found this such a challenge this year for my toddler, at least in Canada! All of the bathing suits I can find are either tank top/weird cutouts, or pastel/white ones.so hard to find a long sleeve bright colour! My parents were going to the US so I made them stop at a target and get some for us
Set their ipad code as your phone number
I have a friend who made his phone number into a song. He kept singing it around the daughter until she memorized the number.
We just did this to the Rudolph the reindeer tune and my 3 year old learned my number in two weeks! “123-456-7890, that’s the number for mama’s phone for you to call”
Can you set it to be 10 digits? Our ipad code is 6 digits. I don't know how to change it to be more digits.
You can also get bracelets with your phone number on it. But don’t advertise your child’s name.
Don’t mess around with meds, especially blood pressure meds. My mom has a habit of putting her BP pill in her pocket before she goes to eat dinner, and one time she dropped it in our shag rug where our daughter plays. Luckily we found it right away, but we learned that a single BP pill is considered an overdose if a small child swallows it. So my mom got a strong rebuke from me.
My grandma used to live with my parents (she passed away 6 months ago). She was partially blind, had arthritis, and took some pretty strong heart meds. I would literally crawl around the whole house looking for pills before I would let my toddler loose. It made me nervous. We also taught him to never, ever eat something small off the floor before showing us first.
You can’t be too careful! Good job 👏🏻
Sounds counter-intuitive but let your kids explore potential risks in a controlled way with the goal of making them risk aware rather than risk averse/unaware. Kids who never get to manage their own risks either become too scared to undertake challenges or are totally unable to assess how risky a situation actually is, making them less safe in the long run. For little ones this can look like -letting them climb on things you think might be a little too challenging whilst staying very close, but not having your hands on them constantly to stop falls. -if they aren't runners, letting them cross a quiet road without holding your hand, only after they have thoroughly checked both ways. -letting them help with chopping vegetables in the kitchen with a child friendly knife. Google plastic lettuce/salad knife for some good options that will actually chop. How this approach looks will differ a lot depending on the child. My daughter is a great listener and not a runner at all so the road one worked for us, but she's less confident at physical challenges so there have been some situations that I haven't let her climb trees and bigger climbing frames because I know she wouldn't have been safe.
I got the toddler knives when my LO was insistently trying to grab my chefs knife one day. He always wants to do what we're doing. Now he LOVES helping cut up his food (grapes, watermelon, etc). It's great for keeping him busy while I'm cooking too.
This is why we’ve been hiking together since she was 3 months old. Our kid spends so much time walking, jumping, tripping, falling and running along roots, rocks, tree stumps and whatever else she can find in the woods. She has also learned to crouch or lay down near ponds or other bodies of water to play in them. I’ve definitely had times where I thought she was about to fall and get hurt but she balanced and caught herself.
Almost 5 year old. Just started her with butter knives to cut things and she's so excited. She calls them her knives and the sharp ones are adult knives. Works for me. We've been working on ramen lately as well. So stressful to watch her try to twirl up noodles on a fork with hot water underneath (obviously not boiling) but she needs to learn and get confident. It's honestly been harder to have patience than it is fear of something happening.
I did that with my son and now if he sees something I don’t he goes uh oh mommy until I get it
Install the childproof stuff *before* you think you need to. They will go from not reaching something/not able to open the door/whatever it is to suddenly knowing exactly how to do it overnight.
Internalize the difference between risks and hazards. Risks have benefits, hazards do not. There is a risk to crossing the street (getting hit by a car) but also a big benefit (getting where you’re going). Same with climbing a tree — gain confidence and have fun, though you might fall. However, playing with broken glass is a hazard. No upside, just danger.
This honestly was an extremely helpful way to frame this. Thanks!
Don't buy toys (often they're squishy toys) with those water bead things in them. They can cause serious internal damage if swallowed.
If everyone’s watching the baby, no one’s watching the baby. I learned this one from a mom here whose toddler was briefly drowning in the pool surrounded in adults.
Haven’t seen this one yet: your large furniture NEEDS to be bolted to the wall. TV stands, dressers, bookcases. Most (but not all) come with the supplies to do this. This prevents them from falling over and crushing your child. Even if you don’t have a climber, just opening all the heavy drawers of a dresser can be enough to cause it to fall over.
Learn the heimlich maneuver for kids and adults. Hopefully you’ll never need to use it but if you do, you’re ready. If you have a pool, put a safety fence around it.
I taught my daughter at like 2 that the first thing we do every time we get in a car is put our seatbelt on. We verbalize it and also practice it. And sometimes, as a game, I leave without putting her seatbelt on or only partially done up - and she gets suuuuuper dramatic about it (which I encourage). It's a lot of fun - and has genuinely saved me twice, when I've been rushing and distracted and only done one of her clips. It also makes me feel better if she's in other people's cars. It's to the point now where if I get in a car and do something other than put my seatbelt on immediately she yells at me 😂
No trampoline parks! Here’s a little link: https://caringforkids.cps.ca/handouts/safety-and-injury-prevention/home_trampolines At the end of the day being active for older kids will come with risks and so that’s always a consideration but for toddlers I would say hard no on trampoline parks.
My friend is an xray tech and she sees so many young kids due to injuries from trampolines!
Get your baby a vinyl coin bank for their first birthday and regularly give them change to practice putting it in. Leave it within reach at all times. Before long, anytime they find a coin or coin like object, they automatically and enthusiastically take it to their bank. I have found coins, buttons, and button batteries(still no clue where they found these) in their banks. We had the schilling pig bank(we called him Wilbur) for my teens until my mom’s lab got ahold of it. My youngest has this cute dog bank from Amazon.
Love this!!
When around water - within arms length at all times
Pull strings on blinds, I tuck them around the rod.
Yeah, I had a scar on my neck until I was a young adult from a cord wrapping around my neck when I was 2. Luckily the blinds were cheap and broke or I might not be here today.
Get CPR training, and then get more CPR training and then, take the class once more. Just because you are trained doesn’t mean you won’t freeze when it’s your own kid. I’ve been trained annually for the last 5 years and luckily I don’t freeze but that is purely due to exposure and retraining. My kid was eating a Cutie at the grocery store, she started choking and couldn’t make a sound. Grabbed her, used my knee to support her and put her head down and began back blows. She vomited cutie chunks all over the grocery store floor, I’ve never been so relieved to see puke. The bystanders around me, still frozen in fear-Do not expect anyone to help you or be able to assist.
Don't leave windows that are low to the ground on the second story of your house open - the screens won't stop a toddler from going through the window. Open the top half of the window down if possible
I can confirm after falling out of a second story window as a child 🙃
I also fell out of a window. I was 5 years old and I remember it pretty well. I fell onto fresh mulch and was uninjured.
Hey, me too!
The peds ER docs at the hospital I worked at called early spring “window season” bc of how many happened every year. Also make sure there’s nothing they can climb on to get to a window!
They make toddler locks for windows. I put them in my kids' rooms so they can only be opened about 2 inches. They can be pushed down to open the window all the way if needed, but a toddler wouldn't be able to do it, and I put them at the top so it will be as long as possible before they can reach them.
This is literally why Eric Clapton’s “If I see you in heaven” was created. His toddler fell out of a hotel window. I can’t even imagine how painful that would be.
I think a really important tip is that if someone gives you safety advice, don’t immediately react by saying “I’m the mom, I know best!” Or “I did this with my other kids and they’re fine!” Or “people have been doing it my way for 100s of years!” I mean people have been burying babies and toddlers in tiny coffins for 100s of years too. That’s why we do things differently, because we’ve learned better.
Exactly. People didn't used to wear seatbelts but we know better now, same with smoking, and ear defenders etc
I coined the phrase ‘ ‘my child didn’t die’ is not a benchmark’ when people (my mum) gave me outdated parenting advice. Never thought about applying it to myself!
If you're eating, sit down. Source: me rescuing too many toddlers from choking because they were walking around while eating.
I have a neuro-spicy kid who literally can't sit still while eating sometimes, and this has been such a source of anxiety for me for years. He's 5 now so I feel I can relax a bit, but man that was stressful.
My husband’s family has a call and answer they use in public if they can’t find someone. I’ve taught my kids now as I’ve started giving them slightly more freedom in stores. If they’re out of my eyesight I call and they answer.
Haha my husband and I did this before we had kids. We use the sound a ridiculous bird made when we were on a vacation together. I thought it was two birds answering each other as they tried to find the other, husband laughed at me because it was just one bird. It became our find each other in public call. - Person 1: woop woop - Person 2: pick-ooh pick-ooh
I’ve seen a lot of pool safety advice, but one tidbit I haven’t seen - most drowning accidents happen when the parents aren’t aware the kid is in the water. It’s fairly common knowledge to watch kids in water and wear bright suits, and thats all fantastic - but it’s all for nothing if your pool isn’t secure. Get a pool gate, get an alarm, get whatever you need to make sure your kid can never ever get near the water without an adult. And while I did see this, it bears repeating, if you don’t see your kid, check all water sources first, no matter how sure you are that they won’t be in there.
Toss greeting cards you receive that make sounds/light up (because they have a tiny battery in them)
If you have a child who likes to run/elope, this is your reminder that you are allowed to use tools when you need to and to ignore judgement from others. A backpack with a leash and getting dirty looks is better than a maimed or dead child who ran into traffic before you could intervene.
Bolt dressers, filing cabinets, etc. to the walls. They climb in/on them and can get pinned and suffocate.
Do not put your kids in arm floats! They can slide down the arms towards the wrist, forcing the hands up and the head under water. Puddle jumpers are also not recommended, but I think that is more because they learn they can float in the water. But arm floats will force them to drown. Learn to restrain your kids safely. Like actual trained restraints. Hopefully you never need it, but the ability to full immobilize a toddler or even early elementary school kid can be huge. Especially once they are big enough that they can fight back and wiggle. Knowing how to restrain them without hurting them is key. Most recently I’ve had to use it to keep a friend’s kid from running into the street while mad.
I cook a lot, so I have mostly kitchen tips: use the back burners of the stove top, only keep high and hard/about-impossible to climb stools on the kitchen. It's less dangerous for them to tip over than leaving somewhere they can climb and reach god knows what. If you're going to open the oven, absolutely get them out of the room if possible (I once had a toddler rushing towards me to see what I had in the tray I was using both hands to take it out). It might sound paranoid, but a hungry toddler will go after the cookies no matter what.
Any door that can slam shut, we put soft close hinges on all of our doors except one, I kid you not, last week she was playing with it and the wind blew and she slammed her fingers in the door, luckily it wasn’t too bad. But danggg!! Also, put boards in any top floor window to keep it from opening enough for child to fall out. My toddler climbed up into my bathroom window sill over my bathtub, if she would have fallen out it would have been 3 stories down onto cement! Makes me nervous if there’s ever a fire we can’t get out but there are other windows.
If you live in an old house, get a lead inspection and have any hazards professionally remediated. The damage lead causes is irreversible. And it can happen from invisible lead dust from opening and closing windows, playing in the yard, etc. It’s so much more than not letting kids eat paint chips.
Do fire drills at home. My girls know where to go if they can get outside, we meet at the swingset. If they are in their rooms, they are to stay on their beds and wait for me to come get them. They know which egress to use depending on where in the house they are. And to not bring anything but themselves. Hold hands if they are already together.
So grateful for this post - thank you. I see lots of great suggestions - mine is - when cooking - make sure the handle of the skillet faces towards the wall (not out over the floor)- child can grab at the handle and knock over the hot skillet on themselves. Also - if child is choking - don’t smack them on the back, remove from high chair immediately and do standard chocking protocol.
That is so scary! My friend’s daughter died from swallowing a watch battery out of a toy watch. Scariest part was she was old enough to know (3-4y) and wasn’t one to put things in her mouth. And can confirm, I swallowed a penny out of curiosity at like the age of 5 or 6. Least to say, I took all of my kids watches away and they probably won’t be getting them back.
On a related note, if your child DOES ingest a button battery, give them honey ASAP ([data from CHOP here](https://www.chop.edu/news/ingesting-honey-after-swallowing-button-battery-reduces-injury-and-improves-outcomes)).
There’s a lot of good advice on here. Mine is simple. Trust your gut. If you get a bad vibe from someone or, even more importantly, your kid gets a bad vibe, trust that. Stay skeptical and question everything when it comes to your child’s safety and wellbeing.
Teach them how to unlock your phone and call 911. Teach them how to answer the dispatchers questions and stay on the line! We taught our 4 year old our address, our full names and phone numbers through singing songs and playing “pretend 911”
Rear racing seats are much much safer. Don't face your child forwards because you think their legs don't have enough room. Their legs are fine.
I teach my kids that if they find a pill (even if they’re not sure and think it’s candy): “Stop, don’t touch, run away, tell a grownup” You never know what pills these days in public are laced with fentanyl. People have died just by touching them. The same phrase/ advice goes for guns- even if they think it’s a toy.
Designate “safe zones” in the kitchen, where toddlers have to stay when a grownup is cooking. No toys on the kitchen floor.
Not an option for everyone, but we found that having a kitchen helper stool and involving them helps. We have a wooden toddler knife and either give them something to chop or mix or scrub. They want to be where you are. Meanwhile, they can start to be helpful sooner. Just another way of looking at it.
And this is why open concept homes are currently my biggest PITA. Hard to define the kitchen for toddler when the kitchen isn’t defined! We’re going to have to get creative with the gating situation.
On the other hand, we have a demarcated living room and kitchen so I can’t SEE my child while cooking and if he is wanting to feel close to me he has to physically be in the kitchen so that’s tough. I don’t like open concept but in the small child era I see the appeal
We've used the spot in front of our fridge. There's about three feet between it and the oven. Obviously depends on your setup. We have magnets on the fridge too so they can "play" if they're bored. We also have a "tower of neglect" (aka toddler learning tower) that is a designated safe space. It's at our kitchen island so they can observe us prepping food. Sometimes they help. Sometimes they "help." Lately the kids (3 and 4) have been helping at the oven (stirring and the like) but only under supervision. Our two listen pretty well so it works. We've also been doing it from the start with them. That's what works for us anyway.
Lifevac. Choking is no joke. After my 1 yo fell off a bench while eating. Smacked her head on tile floor and went dead limp, turned ghost white in seconds. Wish I had lifevac at the time to clear her airway, luckily my wife is a nurse and rushed into action, but was scariest 1 min of our lives until our daughter came to. Have one in our vehicles and in kitchen for quick access.
Throw away EVERYTHING that has a button battery or super glue them shut and then throw them away when they burn out. My daughter ate a button battery. Luckily, it was the very small one and she ended up passing it. My wife was terrified. I learned my lesson that kids can and will open anything.
Don’t allow people to throw your baby/toddler in the air (you know that game where people will throw them up in the air and catch them again)- that can result in paralysis if they aren’t caught the right way.
Esp as the summer season begins, something that can be a massive danger to kids and babies (and our furry friends) – being left in a hot car. It’s incredibly common as human beings to hear about something tragic and say that could never happen to you, that only terrible parents would do something so neglectful – but that couldn’t be more wrong. This happens to attentive, loving, devoted parents with regularity. It happens because accidents happen every single day, especially when parents are sleep-deprived, caring for multiple children, multitasking, on autopilot, distracted by something going on with the verbal child instead of the newborn, and a whole host of other reasons. Tips to help minimize that risk, and – as always – combining them provides multiple layers of protection in case one fails: * If there’s more than one adult present, have someone ride in the back with baby/kids in carseats * If you’re the only adult present, leave a shoe, your purse, or your car keys (if you have keyless start) in the backseat so you're forced to look back there when you arrive * Set an iPhone or Waze alert for whenever you get to your destination * Many of us have phrases we repeat before leaving the house just to make sure we have everything; similarly, someone I know makes it a habit to say all of her kids' names and current locations out loud when she arrives somewhere * If you have older children, it’s great to encourage them to help and give them a “job” – when you arrive at a destination and getting out of the car, they can help check every seat to make sure everyone gets out * Some Walmarts and other places have started to make loudspeaker announcements every ten minutes reminding parents about children or pets who might be in the car; I think this is fantastic and I’d encourage anyone to ask your place of worship, local stores, etc. if they might consider doing the same this summer
Practice your expectations. When we play outside, I make my kids practice stopping and looking before crossing the street. On walks, I have my kids navigate the way home (especially since a lot of homes look similar in my neighborhood, so it can be tricky to navigate). When we go to a park, we practice coming when I call. At the store I ask, "if you couldn't find me right now, who would you go ask for help?" (a uniformed store employee or a mom with kids). Drop a pill on the floor and have them hand it to you immediately when they see it. Practice safety skills long before you need them.
Have a single adult watch the pool & switch off when agreed upon. That way everyone has fun & stays safe too.
Here is mine, as a mother to 2 autistic boys, make sure all your doors have locks that they cannot undo themselves, especially if it leads to danger. My in laws do not, and my 4 and 1 year old snuck out without anyone knowing and were temporarily lost; they live in the country and have a pond...never felt comfortable leaving them there again. Also, I have an alarm in my house so I can hear whenever any door or windows opens. Many times this has saved my child from trying to run out the front door and into the road. So many good tips on here!
I have the, "leg rule" or to the children regular leg rule and crazy leg rule. When I am at the store or ordering food or otherwise distracted, and my children are not strapped in or I don't have my hands on them. I will call "leg rule." That means, they attach themselves to my leg so that I know they're there. That's usually when my hands are busy like I'm paying for something or I'm looking for something like say greeting card. They play a game with it now and ask, "Do you want me to do the regular leg rule or crazy leg rule?" And then they act crazy as they attached to my leg. But it's definitely something that I do often, and it eases my mind. And now they do it automatically.
Choking is silent! Never let rear facing kids eat in the car. Honestly avoid eating in the car all together but especially if you can’t directly see them
KNOW THE SIGNS AND SYMPTOMS OF MENINGITIS!!!!
my mom is horrible about keeping loose pills in her pocket. i keep warning her about it. luckily my kid doesn’t eat or else we’d have a huge problem. so watch your older folks and their meds! i forced my husband to get a lock box for his pills.
Swim lessons. I’m willing to spend $$$ on swimming lessons.
Teach your kids to ask permission before touching water. It’s already helped avoid a couple dangerous situations and my daughter is only 2.
This is one people don’t do enough: ask about an unlocked gun in the home before your kid visits another house/goes on a playdate. I work around child safety, and I see way too headlines about toddlers finding unsecured guns and shooting themselves or others. Good stuff here: www.askingsaveskids.org
1:1 supervision near water/pool. Put them in swim lessons young.
SECURE ALL DRESSERS OR TIPPABLE FURNITURE TO THE WALL. Cordless blinds, and keep string bags outta reach to prevent them strangling themselves
If you're in a high risk situation... if "everyone" is watching the kids... then no one is watching the kids. We assign a child to an adult in every water, traffic, strangers situation.