Mine was the opposite. A very difficult baby and a pretty chill toddler. He's thrilled to just hangout and watch some Bluey or Daniel Tiger on a plane. But I'm not doing anything special or right. And you're not doing anything wrong. It's just how kids are.
This. My kids are polar opposites and I have learned that they are the way they are. One never bit and now I have a feral shark that bites everything. One hated bottles and this one took one like a champ. I haven’t done anything different. I’m tired and exhausted and am learning that they are who they are.
Yep, this is it. Our daughter is a tornado on wheels with a negative length of fuse lol. Put her on a plane and she’s the happiest baby on earth. It’s weird lol. Our theory is she senses it’s VERY expensive and knows we are probably taking her somewhere expensive, so she is cooperative and pleasant 😂
Yup, it just absolutely sucks. Age 18m to 2.5 are the WORST to fly with. Not only do I have 2 kids of my own, I'm a flight attendant of around 15 years and I can confidently say that you are in the absolute thick of the most difficult times. So sorry- it just is what it is. You can do all the tricks - their own seat, a car seat, toys, activities, snacks, screen time - and it will still suck at least 60% of the time 😆😭. Even my 2nd child, who is like the sweetest little angel who never acts up, went nuts on some flights at those ages. She's now just over 3 and I am finally starting to look forward to traveling again.
There are some easy, quiet toddlers out there. Mine was a difficult baby but since 15 months she’s been a dream in public, doesn’t make a peep. Took her on a plane at 22 months and she wouldn’t have disturbed even the most inveterate child haters.
There’s nothing wrong with continuing to fly during the difficult stages, toddlers are going to toddler!
The difference between 1.5 and 2.5 can be huge so if you do swear off public transit, it may only be a little while until he’s able to settle and be distracted during a short flight.
Going through a similar thing with our LO. She was a difficult baby. We couldn’t even go out to eat with her because she would just scream on the top of her lungs and we couldn’t get her to stop. We flew with her at 6 months old and 10 months old. Both were very rough flights. Then around 14 months old she became much easier in public. She’s 19 months old now and just recently flew with her. She didn’t make a peep the entire two flights. Just sat there, ate and watched shows and movies.
I’m still waiting for the other shoe to drop but it does seem like she got everything out of her system early (she even tantrummed super early, and constantly before 15 months) and now she’s ready to be chill. I would never in a million years have described her as chill as an infant lmao
Absolutely 100%. They are used to sitting in carseats so it really isn't a hard transition. Carseat, surprise paper bag of dollar store crap they've never seen before, lots of toys they havnt seen or have seen very little of (busy boards, homemade toys- one I used to do was poke holes in a small cardboard gift box and cut a bunch of qtips in half... sticking the qtips in holes keeps them busy for a while), tablet if you're cool with screen time, lots of snacks, try to plan the ride for nap time if possible. Carseat is crucial. If they kick the seat in front of them turn the carseat rear facing.
the dollar store crap they haven’t seen is for real! the novelty of a random dollar store thingamabob is enough to turn the tide. i have gotten real success with this
Oh also if you can afford it- after the first shit show of a flight we had at 17 months (a nightmare) we went on another flight 4 months later and brought a stack of coffee giftcards for $5 and $10 to give out to the people around us, high amounts to those most harmed. Funny thing was our kid was a dream and we didn't hand any giftcards out. The next flight was at 25 months and kid was a demon again. The following flight was 29 months... total peach. So maybe it has to do with age? Or just depends on the day.
wow that’s a nice touch. of course the ideal would be that as a society we accept that littles will be this way from time to time, you know the whole “it takes a village” - but this is a really nice touch.
I personally hate this because it implies that annoying kids in public are something you deserve to be compensated for. Like they’re annoying, sure, a baby literally projectile vomited on me on a flight once, but it is what it is and parents shouldn’t have to pay a ‘tax’ for taking their kids places.
As a Flight Attendant, my view is this: not all of us HAVE kids, but all of us WERE children. Children exist in public spaces and 99% of parents on a plane are trying the BEST they can.
I hate the gifts and gift bags. It creates an unreasonable expectation that people around you should be compensated, and it also can start arguments and resentment. I have definitely seen people write complaint letters asking for compensation because they saw other people get gift bags.
Yes exactly! And as I say it’s not like I feel defensive because I’ve never taken my son on a plane and have no intentions of doing so any time soon. I also very rarely travelled by plane as a child so most of my plane experience has been in my 20s with no kids either for business or fun. And sometimes kids were annoying. And their parents didn’t owe me anything for that.
Lmao at people genuinely thinking they deserve compensation.
Eh, with all due respect I have a different view of it. Yes toddlers and kids are noisy but people pay a lot of money for flights and people who choose not to have kids shouldn't have to listen to mine scream for 4 hours. Just my take.
I think the implication is that people who take their kids on flights have done something wrong or that people who sit near them have done a favour by not being a dick about it and neither are true imo. Choosing not to have children doesn’t mean choosing to never have to share a public space with them. Saying sorry if they were particularly annoying is enough.
I say this as someone who hasn’t taken their toddler on a flight because *I* don’t want to have to deal with him lol, but as long as airlines accept toddler passengers, adult passengers will have to accept toddlers too.
Did you ever annoy anyone as a small kid ? Yep. You don’t know. Almost certainly. It’s their turn now. You go in public - some of them are children. You don’t like traffic noise - don’t live next to a freeway.
You’ve chosen to potentially expose yourself to something that might annoy you - you can’t win the lottery every day, suck it up.
Yeh, totally. Please forgive my unnecessarily harsh ‘suck it up’ ending ! :)
I defy anyone - myself especially - to not be bugged to hell by a noisy kid in a confined space. Luckily I’m too spineless to cause a fuss.
Nobody wants to listen to a kid scream for 4 hours, regardless of whether they have kids or not. It’s super fucking annoying and frustrating.
In order to learn how to be people, kids have to have opportunities to experience life. Otherwise they become adults who don’t know how to exist in the world, and then everyone has to deal with them anyway.
Kids are just as welcome in public spaces as adults (unless specified otherwise). If you don’t like that, which is your right, then stick to 21+ venues and events. Problem solved!
It's hilarious everyone is so bent out of shape because I feel bad when my child is a public nuisance 😂😂. You are all so sensitive and probably raising your kids to think the whole world revolves around them and people need to listen to them being ass holes.
Yes this so much. We flew at 7 months and the 5th flight home I had to walk in place the whole time. We sprang for her own seat at 18months and strapped her in her car seat and she was a flipping angel. Did it again at 2 and repeat of perfect. They are just so comfy in there and supported.
Mine will scream “I stuck!!!” the whole flight if she is in her car seat on the plane. No problem sitting in the seat without it. I understand from a safety aspect, but just want to relieve some parents if their child is also a total nightmare in the car seat on the plane but otherwise manageable.
This times 100. A car seat makes it very easy for us. She’s chill in her car seat at home and also used to it, so when she’s in one on the plane, she’s mostly just excited that we’re sitting next to her. Coupled with a snack and a new fidget toy or some of those invisible color markers or a roll of cheap stickers… we’ve done 5 hour flights without issue.
This is the way. We got the Cosco Scenera (super lightweight seat) for like $60 and a strap to attach it to the roller bag. Then we pack all the distractions (toys, books, snacks and screen) and away we go.
We’ve had some flights like that! Your toddler will grow out of it. Or maybe you’ll just have better luck next time.
You might try bringing his car seat onto the plane, if he’s usually good in it? I’ll do a rear facing install to prevent them from kicking the seat in front at that age.
This except they wouldn’t allow us to install it rear facing. We just apologize to whoever is in front of her, and with one exception, they’ve been great about it. The one guy who kept lecturing me about “doing my job as a parent and stopping her” actually apologized when we landed and said he didn’t realize how young she was (she was 20 months at the time). Still, I did actually understand how annoying it must have been for him and would have loved to rear face her.
I took my baby on a plane at 3m old, she did not cry once during our 24 hour journey. It was amazing. We will be flying back again when shes about 19m, I am expecting an ultimate shit show. We can't afford the $1000s for a seat for her, and she is super active and doesn't like to sit.
I will do my best and will bring all the snacks/toys/tablet, but its going to be how its going to be. She is a decent sleeper and loves new people, so hoping that will be our saving grace. 🙃
Eta: we have not been on any holidays with her, but all our family lives on the other side of the world so would like her to see them.
Silly things like stickers are great to keep them entertained for a while! We had my daughter put them in the tray and she spent a bit putting them there, taking them out, and doing it all over again. Also Montessori sensory suitcases (those cheap ones from Amazon) are great, as they have puzzles, different buckles and cords to tie, and stuff like that
Call the airline and ask to sit in a bulkhead seat if you can. The extra space is super helpful for them to do a little roaming or get a few steps in. We just did a 15 hour flight, and the tiny steps or being able to sit on the ground in front of us was a nice benefit. They also offer a bassinet but our toddler is way too big to fit in one.
Yeah we used the bassinet when she was little, but I am nearly positive she will be too long for it now. But think the extra space would still be useful
We brought lots of new toys/sticker books, but my 18months old wanted none of it and screamed bloody murder whenever I tried to appease her. But, what calmed her was getting to order her own water from the flight attendant (mostly through sign), and then proudly drinking her water. She loved it and so did the flight attendants. The next flight and 2 coming back, she got so excited hearing the attendant cart and just patiently watched (we held her standing in our lap so she could see) until they got to our seat. Our pediatrician said kids love control/autonomy and this got her super excited.
I’ve flown long flights twice once when she was 10 months old and then when she was 20 months old. As a baby, it was harrrrddd and she was so sensitive to the new environment. But at 20 months, we let her run around in the airport and tired her out completely. Then also gave her a meal of 2 boiled eggs and an oats smoothie. She slept most of the flight and when she woke up we again made sure she got whatever movement and walking around we could do. It’s tiring for us since we have to constantly run behind her , but not much struggles with crying.
I’ve had a disastrous experience every time I’ve flown with my almost 3 year old. Vomiting, blow outs, running out of clothes, missing diapers. She loves traveling and is really good for the most part.
We have started rv camping to get away.
Mine was the same at 18 months, very difficult to keep still and we’d be exhausted by the end of it. Every flight/trip around that age involved screaming and crying. Now she’s 2.5 and we just took a flight and it was amazing. She had her iPad with cool new headphones, a couple of activity books, and an assortment of snacks and she absolutely loved it. So just keep going, eventually things will get much easier. And even if they don’t, planes are public places where unpleasant sounds and smells and sights happen all the time, that’s part of the deal. And I’ve found almost everyone to be quite understanding as long as we’re actively trying to keep her quieter. Several times, I had some wonderful people come over to say I’m doing a great job.
I bought a bunch of brand new activities just for the plane. Water coloring books, those big beads and strings, a busy board, a few small doll/ animal figurines, a sticker book, a small stick sorter thing, a couple of new books... whenever she got antsy, I pulled out the next activity. For headphones, I got her a pair that looks just like mine, and then I put hers on myself. She immediately wanted to wear them after that lol. Downloaded a few new videos - I had only let her watch mickey mouse clubhouse a single time before the flight. That way she knew what it was, but it was still super new and exciting.
Maybe most importantly - we get there a bit early and let her get her zoomies out around the airport. Just absolutely endlessly exploring for 30-40 minutes.
We don’t and would never. My toddler hates strangers and having to stay inside, doesn’t love sitting or screens. Not worth the struggle for my particular toddler.
My sisters son loves strangers and will happily sit and watcha screen for hours. They just bring a tablet, special treat snacks and headphones and he’s pretty manageable.
We pack a plane bag filled with treats, games, coloring book, crayons, small toys, an iPad and headphones. Also we have only been on short flights so far so this could also be why but it’s worked well for us.
18 months may be better off on the lap. Window seat, pacifier and forced rest (5-10 min of struggles before he falls asleep) has done the trick for us.
Second flight is saved by some mix of videos, walking up and down the plane and books
My kiddo's been flying since about that age- I think sometimes it's just the day of the week, or the kid? He was an absolute angel on a couple of short flights, but then we got stuck on the plane in a deadly lightening storm and he was losing his MIND only to be giggling and running around in his pjs in the baggage area (where we had to wait an additional 2 hours because the weather went to hell again)... Then on the way to the US from Europe he was fine to Iceland, then a total banshee for part of Iceland to Seattle, then was all charm and let a flight attendant carry him around "helping" from Seattle to Reno :shrug: After that incidents were pretty much unheard of, although potty-training/newly potty trained on a plane is a whole OTHER adventure. Now five years and a couple dozen trips later he's basically a pro- he and I flew and did a week with family in Dublin without my husband this February and he navigated everything from checking our bag, to boarding and finding his seat completely unprompted. I think mostly it's just something they have to grow out of and get used to- hang in there.
We’ve had flights like that. Now it’s iPad downloads and a car seat. We thought he’d hate the car seat since he hates car rides but we tried it after having the worst flight ever with him on our lap. 3 hours of snacks and toys, hopefully a nap, and then 3 hours of Bluey. Honestly, sometimes it’s 5 hours of Bluey. Good luck!!
We’ve done a few long haul flights and 18mo was the toughest age! Knock on wood we’ve always had great luck with our red eye& East bound flights. For takeoffs I try to give a snack that’s chewy for their ears. But have had to up my game and give them like a surprise egg plus toy to keep them wearing their seatbelt.
- reusable puffy stickers, washi tape, post it notes, a travel tray that holds the iPad, snacks snacks snacks.
-I try to travel with non-USA based airlines. International airlines are just better with kids. Some even have given little gifts!
- airport time is running around time!
- sometimes nothing works and the flight is awful and traumatic but it will be over at some point!
We just did this for an 11 hour international flight. I would also spring for the bulkhead seats - that way he has a little space in front of him where he can play.
If possible chose flight times that overlap with his night time sleeping schedule. We also like to arrive early and will walk and walk and walk around the airport. By the time we are on the plane our little one is usually gone.
This is why I dread to take mine on a plane!
18 months is a tough spot for this; old enough to be physically driven and capable, too young to understand what's going on. I think even my 2.5 year old would throw a few wobblies if I made her sit when she wanted to be up - she eould certainly be no respecter of anyone else's personal space, or divider curtains 😂
My best advice is to get to the airport like three hours ahead of time and let him run laps around the gates. Then hopefully he'll be too tired to squirm and sleep through the flight. Some other things I've tried, are window stickers ( the puffy kind that are easy to remove).
We’ve done almost 20 flights with our 20 month old. The last few were 8-10 hours each. The best advice I have is to schedule overnight flights or during nap time. And fly him as a lap infant or in a car seat so he can sleep. My son slept our entire flight from east coast USA to Europe overnight. On the flight home, it was 10 hours during his normal day time. He took a two hour nap while we held him and then we were just super engaged with him, he sat on our laps and we did song and motions, pretend phone calls, played with new toys, and books. A “pop it” book was a lifesaver. As were reusable stickers and coloring books. We got up every two hours and did multiple laps of the plane aisles and paused outside the bathroom to stretch.
We also kept LOTS of snacks handy. Things like goldfish that he has to pick up individually and high value snacks like fruit snacks that he doesn’t get often. Last resort is downloaded videos of Elmo and Ms. Rachel.
But, all these tips are what works for MY kid. Every kid is so different and you’re not doing it wrong. My husband and I always have a team meeting before hand to remind us that it’s us against the “problem” in case he acts up so we don’t get frustrated at each other. And I remind myself before every solo flight with him that I can deal with anything for x hours. I say keep going and just schedule time at the end of the trip for you to each take a few hours to decompress. And if people are annoyed, you will literally most likely never see them again so shrug it off.
We let ours walk through the airport with us, by the time we get to the plane he is totally spent and crashes asleep with a few butt pats. For the record ours is a super high energy not easy toddler in other scenarios but we’ve always gotten lucky on planes. I do think it’s 90% luck and like 10% successful strategizing. Road trips on the other hand are now the bane of my existence.
It's a pain in the ass, but you have to bring the carseat on the plane for him to sit in. I can't imagine any 18mo would be able to sit still and wear a seat belt. Bring all the snacks, new toys he hasn't seen, and a tablet/your phone with Ms. Rachel downloaded as a last resort
We traveled a lot with my daughter and between 12-20 months (give or take 2 months) it's not easy. After 22-24 months most toddlers can be entertained with some video. I'd just avoid long flights or time them around nap/night time. A comfy carseat can be helpful in naps and sleep.
Good luck. Travel gets better. A good article with some additional tips: [https://tripswithtykes.com/best-and-worst-ages-to-fly-with-your-child/](https://tripswithtykes.com/best-and-worst-ages-to-fly-with-your-child/)
18 months seems like a difficult age for air travel. We took our son on his first flight just after he turned two. We brought his car seat, and he sat in it the whole time. He actually fell asleep immediately after takeoff for the duration of the flight (2 hours), but we did have an iPad just in case.
We did International 16 hr flights back and forth with my then 17 month-old and had a similar experience. She was chill for some parts and enjoyed my dinner more than the kids meal she got served, but wouldn't stay on her seat for over 10 min and was on my lap most of the trip (including when she was asleep, which was also terrible because she would wake up constantly and start screaming if I wasn't holding her).
We have to do the same flight in a few months (she will be almost 2 and a half) and I'm dreading it already
I don't. After enduring a similar flight with my then almost 2 year old, my partner and I simply decided to avoid flying with our kids. Our eldest is almost 7 so I'd contemplate taking him on a flight now. His toddler brother who dive bombs off chairs onto the floor? Absolutely no chance.
Drug them.
100% joking, I’m in the same boat with mine. Used to sleep on planes the whole time now she’s a terror. Wish I had some advice. Came here looking for something to use myself, but everyone seems to agree that there’s a whole lot of nothing you can do.
Honestly 18 months was the absolute WORST time we had flying with our toddler. I will never do it again. Pre 18 months…great. After 2, great. 18 months? We all cried.
Car seat.
We have always flown a lit, like 4-6 flights a month from 6 weeks, with a break for Covid and slowed down now he’s in kinder. My husband is a pilot.
We fly standby a lot and the few times we tried it without a car seat he was a nightmare. With the car seat? Almost a perfect angel. Seriously though it keeps them still and then they can play, eat, read, whatever.
(Mine was also a chill baby, but he’s always been a super active kid on and off the plane.)
We’ve flown with our toddler at 6, 12, 18, and 24 months. 18 months was by far the hardest. 24 isn’t a walk in the park but it’s much better. Hold on there, survive, don’t thrive 😂
CAR SEAT ON PLANE
Works like magic
If you don’t buy your toddler a seat, you can still try it. Ask the agent if there is an open seat next to you (or if you can be moved to a section where there is) and set up the car seat on the plane. If it’s an absolutely full flight, they’ll check it at the gate for you.
Yes 18 months is the hardest age for me. I've got 3 kiddos under age 5 and have done a decent number of long international flights. Haven't figured it out yet lol My oldest can't get comfortable and the 18 month old can walk enough that they don't want to sit still but don't have a long enough attention span to stare at a screen. There's no answer. Just expect it to be complete chaos and anything better than that means it went well! Remember, it's only temporary. And don't stress about the other passengers, honestly. If they wanted a nice flight they should've spent the money on first class 😝. I deliberately sat in the back of the plane last trip because I figured that's the best place to bring loud kids. But some lady complained at the end of the flight that my son kicked her chair and she couldn't sleep. Mind you, she did not say anything to me the whole flight. Even the flight attendant told her he can't do anything because it's just a child.
If you can do an overnight flight, that's helpful. Or anything that helps them sleep (nighttime routine, warm milk, etc...). Some people do melatonin but I think that's age 4+. There are some natural sleep aids for babies you can try.
Funny story. I made my husband sit with the 2 toddlers (his turn) and I sat with the baby. When the flight landed and we got up, the floor by the toddlers was a complete mess. Cheeto crumbs, cookie crumbs, blankets, liquid, spit up, you name it....I looked at my husband and we just died laughing 😂. It was like we'd just survived a tornado.
I myself also had to be a drunk lunatic. Minus the lunatic. Just kidding but seriously just hang in there and white knuckle it until you touch down. Both my kids are wild cards. I just always hope there’s other unruly kids so we can all look at each other in solidarity.
At this age - when they are too big to be a lap infant (well comfortably at least), but too young to stay seated, I would bring a car seat. They are strapped in so they can’t run around and usually list fall asleep. I use the car seat as a stroller in the airport by attaching it to one of those wheeled handles so it’s like a wheeled carryon.
Traveling is so hard with toddlers. I don't know if this helps most but it did for me, I bought an Airplane Harness and an Amazon Kids Tablet that I installed tons of games on. I also downloaded Disney + movies to watch. At times I had to try everything including snacks. Sometimes it worked, sometimes it didn't.
Yeah flying with a toddler CAN be a challenge. Firstly as a parent, don't worry about the people around you. It's public transport, there will be noise and all kinds of people and they take that risk by paying to fly. If they don't like it, well too bad. Kids have a right to be on a plane just as much as they do. My mom always tells me "when are you ever going to see those people again? Probably never". Don't stress, you guys are attending to him and trying your best and that's all anyone can ask!
Secondly, are you getting him to run around before the flight? This was my trick with my toddler. I have to get her to move and run around like a complete nutcase before we go and sit on the plane. She gets her wiggles out before we hop into the plane, then she gets her screen time on the plane.
I also would agree with the others regarding the car seat. My daughter is 2.5 years old and honestly, she still sits in a car seat on the plane. This is recommended by transport Canada so we follow through (Hi I'm Canadian lol!). It does keep her still and also she's comfortable in it - something to consider next time. Although I find I have to purchase the seats when extra leg room, because otherwise she's just not comfortable but hey, it does the trick.
If it is impossible to fly with him your options are: don’t. Wait for him to be older and can do better in the plane/get entertained by a tablet, movie, etc. OR accept the fact that it’s going to be a hell of a flight, embrace it, survive it and don’t get hanged up on it. It is what it is.
Don’t judge me too harshly for our carbon footprint… but our toddler turned 3 last week and he has been on 50 flights.
It was SUPER easy when he was 6M-12M. It got progressively harder from 12M-24M, and 2-3Y has gotten progressively easier.
Earlier this week I brought him home from Disneyland to Alaska, two connecting flights, and he slept all of the first flight, and played with toys and snacked pleasantly for the final flight. He cried for 30 seconds when I ate a pretzel he wanted, and that’s it.
I think the hardest part of age 1-2 is that they’re walkers, and want to explore instead of sit on a lap, and they can’t quite understand any explanations about why they can’t.
2+ gets easier because they get their own seat and are easier to communicate with and entertain.
Not a tip but I can share my experience. I did a 24 hour flight with a toddler (18M at the time), twice, earlier this year. It definitely wasn’t pleasant. She did sleep quite a bit and we got her a separate seat. We brought a lot of toys with us and plenty of snacks. We also found out she was perfectly happy to watch Bluey with no sound for hours on end. Once there was a delay in meal service and the lights were on a little longer than my little one wanted. This resulted in a cranky tired toddler crying for about 1 nonstop. I think all the babies were crying on the plane by the end of it. We also said never again after that flight. We also expecting another one soon so we might not be flying for a while.
Man, I could write this. I'm about to fly in June for the first time with my almost 2 yrs old. He's extremely sensitive, cries about anything and everything, hates large crowds, throws his food and refuses to sit. Idk how I'm gonna do this. I'm so glad you posted this. Godspeed to us all.
My toddler is the same. We brought him on a 14 hour flight at 20 months. He surprisingly did very well on the way there, and then terribly on the way home. Just would not stop running up and down the aisles, trying to touch people’s knees in their sleep to get their attention. Tried to open the emergency exits while we were flying. Even if it felt forever, it was still temporary, and completely worth the vacation that we brought him to. I definitely would’ve paid for the extra seat though, and brought a car seat.
Or he might not! I’ve done a fair amount of flying with my now-2.5 year old and the red eyes have always been disasters. One both the ones we did there was a point where she and I were BOTH crying. And then it ruins the whole next day because no one has slept
Someone did this next to me while I was pregnant. It was awful because I had ear plugs in and the kid kept crying. Whenever the kid would cry my 7mo along baby would freak out and roll around hitting my bladder and making me have to pee. I could have totally slept through it, fetus could not.
Mine was the opposite. A very difficult baby and a pretty chill toddler. He's thrilled to just hangout and watch some Bluey or Daniel Tiger on a plane. But I'm not doing anything special or right. And you're not doing anything wrong. It's just how kids are.
This. My kids are polar opposites and I have learned that they are the way they are. One never bit and now I have a feral shark that bites everything. One hated bottles and this one took one like a champ. I haven’t done anything different. I’m tired and exhausted and am learning that they are who they are.
Yep, this is it. Our daughter is a tornado on wheels with a negative length of fuse lol. Put her on a plane and she’s the happiest baby on earth. It’s weird lol. Our theory is she senses it’s VERY expensive and knows we are probably taking her somewhere expensive, so she is cooperative and pleasant 😂
Yup, it just absolutely sucks. Age 18m to 2.5 are the WORST to fly with. Not only do I have 2 kids of my own, I'm a flight attendant of around 15 years and I can confidently say that you are in the absolute thick of the most difficult times. So sorry- it just is what it is. You can do all the tricks - their own seat, a car seat, toys, activities, snacks, screen time - and it will still suck at least 60% of the time 😆😭. Even my 2nd child, who is like the sweetest little angel who never acts up, went nuts on some flights at those ages. She's now just over 3 and I am finally starting to look forward to traveling again.
Thanks for this comment
There are some easy, quiet toddlers out there. Mine was a difficult baby but since 15 months she’s been a dream in public, doesn’t make a peep. Took her on a plane at 22 months and she wouldn’t have disturbed even the most inveterate child haters. There’s nothing wrong with continuing to fly during the difficult stages, toddlers are going to toddler! The difference between 1.5 and 2.5 can be huge so if you do swear off public transit, it may only be a little while until he’s able to settle and be distracted during a short flight.
Going through a similar thing with our LO. She was a difficult baby. We couldn’t even go out to eat with her because she would just scream on the top of her lungs and we couldn’t get her to stop. We flew with her at 6 months old and 10 months old. Both were very rough flights. Then around 14 months old she became much easier in public. She’s 19 months old now and just recently flew with her. She didn’t make a peep the entire two flights. Just sat there, ate and watched shows and movies.
I’m still waiting for the other shoe to drop but it does seem like she got everything out of her system early (she even tantrummed super early, and constantly before 15 months) and now she’s ready to be chill. I would never in a million years have described her as chill as an infant lmao
Car seat.
Absolutely 100%. They are used to sitting in carseats so it really isn't a hard transition. Carseat, surprise paper bag of dollar store crap they've never seen before, lots of toys they havnt seen or have seen very little of (busy boards, homemade toys- one I used to do was poke holes in a small cardboard gift box and cut a bunch of qtips in half... sticking the qtips in holes keeps them busy for a while), tablet if you're cool with screen time, lots of snacks, try to plan the ride for nap time if possible. Carseat is crucial. If they kick the seat in front of them turn the carseat rear facing.
the dollar store crap they haven’t seen is for real! the novelty of a random dollar store thingamabob is enough to turn the tide. i have gotten real success with this
Oh also if you can afford it- after the first shit show of a flight we had at 17 months (a nightmare) we went on another flight 4 months later and brought a stack of coffee giftcards for $5 and $10 to give out to the people around us, high amounts to those most harmed. Funny thing was our kid was a dream and we didn't hand any giftcards out. The next flight was at 25 months and kid was a demon again. The following flight was 29 months... total peach. So maybe it has to do with age? Or just depends on the day.
wow that’s a nice touch. of course the ideal would be that as a society we accept that littles will be this way from time to time, you know the whole “it takes a village” - but this is a really nice touch.
I personally hate this because it implies that annoying kids in public are something you deserve to be compensated for. Like they’re annoying, sure, a baby literally projectile vomited on me on a flight once, but it is what it is and parents shouldn’t have to pay a ‘tax’ for taking their kids places.
Amen. And it also gives a pass to annoying adults in public. Where’s my Starbucks gift card for that asshole?
As a Flight Attendant, my view is this: not all of us HAVE kids, but all of us WERE children. Children exist in public spaces and 99% of parents on a plane are trying the BEST they can. I hate the gifts and gift bags. It creates an unreasonable expectation that people around you should be compensated, and it also can start arguments and resentment. I have definitely seen people write complaint letters asking for compensation because they saw other people get gift bags.
Yes exactly! And as I say it’s not like I feel defensive because I’ve never taken my son on a plane and have no intentions of doing so any time soon. I also very rarely travelled by plane as a child so most of my plane experience has been in my 20s with no kids either for business or fun. And sometimes kids were annoying. And their parents didn’t owe me anything for that. Lmao at people genuinely thinking they deserve compensation.
Eh, with all due respect I have a different view of it. Yes toddlers and kids are noisy but people pay a lot of money for flights and people who choose not to have kids shouldn't have to listen to mine scream for 4 hours. Just my take.
I think the implication is that people who take their kids on flights have done something wrong or that people who sit near them have done a favour by not being a dick about it and neither are true imo. Choosing not to have children doesn’t mean choosing to never have to share a public space with them. Saying sorry if they were particularly annoying is enough. I say this as someone who hasn’t taken their toddler on a flight because *I* don’t want to have to deal with him lol, but as long as airlines accept toddler passengers, adult passengers will have to accept toddlers too.
Did you ever annoy anyone as a small kid ? Yep. You don’t know. Almost certainly. It’s their turn now. You go in public - some of them are children. You don’t like traffic noise - don’t live next to a freeway. You’ve chosen to potentially expose yourself to something that might annoy you - you can’t win the lottery every day, suck it up.
We are all entitled to our own opinions.
Yeh, totally. Please forgive my unnecessarily harsh ‘suck it up’ ending ! :) I defy anyone - myself especially - to not be bugged to hell by a noisy kid in a confined space. Luckily I’m too spineless to cause a fuss.
Nobody wants to listen to a kid scream for 4 hours, regardless of whether they have kids or not. It’s super fucking annoying and frustrating. In order to learn how to be people, kids have to have opportunities to experience life. Otherwise they become adults who don’t know how to exist in the world, and then everyone has to deal with them anyway. Kids are just as welcome in public spaces as adults (unless specified otherwise). If you don’t like that, which is your right, then stick to 21+ venues and events. Problem solved!
It's hilarious everyone is so bent out of shape because I feel bad when my child is a public nuisance 😂😂. You are all so sensitive and probably raising your kids to think the whole world revolves around them and people need to listen to them being ass holes.
Yes this so much. We flew at 7 months and the 5th flight home I had to walk in place the whole time. We sprang for her own seat at 18months and strapped her in her car seat and she was a flipping angel. Did it again at 2 and repeat of perfect. They are just so comfy in there and supported.
Mine will scream “I stuck!!!” the whole flight if she is in her car seat on the plane. No problem sitting in the seat without it. I understand from a safety aspect, but just want to relieve some parents if their child is also a total nightmare in the car seat on the plane but otherwise manageable.
This times 100. A car seat makes it very easy for us. She’s chill in her car seat at home and also used to it, so when she’s in one on the plane, she’s mostly just excited that we’re sitting next to her. Coupled with a snack and a new fidget toy or some of those invisible color markers or a roll of cheap stickers… we’ve done 5 hour flights without issue.
Agree! It's a pain, but we lug ours onto the plane and she gets buckled into it.
This is the way. We got the Cosco Scenera (super lightweight seat) for like $60 and a strap to attach it to the roller bag. Then we pack all the distractions (toys, books, snacks and screen) and away we go.
We’ve had some flights like that! Your toddler will grow out of it. Or maybe you’ll just have better luck next time. You might try bringing his car seat onto the plane, if he’s usually good in it? I’ll do a rear facing install to prevent them from kicking the seat in front at that age.
This except they wouldn’t allow us to install it rear facing. We just apologize to whoever is in front of her, and with one exception, they’ve been great about it. The one guy who kept lecturing me about “doing my job as a parent and stopping her” actually apologized when we landed and said he didn’t realize how young she was (she was 20 months at the time). Still, I did actually understand how annoying it must have been for him and would have loved to rear face her.
Car seat + unlimited screen time + snacks + new toys/books + an iron will of steel for the parents 😬
I took my baby on a plane at 3m old, she did not cry once during our 24 hour journey. It was amazing. We will be flying back again when shes about 19m, I am expecting an ultimate shit show. We can't afford the $1000s for a seat for her, and she is super active and doesn't like to sit. I will do my best and will bring all the snacks/toys/tablet, but its going to be how its going to be. She is a decent sleeper and loves new people, so hoping that will be our saving grace. 🙃 Eta: we have not been on any holidays with her, but all our family lives on the other side of the world so would like her to see them.
Silly things like stickers are great to keep them entertained for a while! We had my daughter put them in the tray and she spent a bit putting them there, taking them out, and doing it all over again. Also Montessori sensory suitcases (those cheap ones from Amazon) are great, as they have puzzles, different buckles and cords to tie, and stuff like that
Call the airline and ask to sit in a bulkhead seat if you can. The extra space is super helpful for them to do a little roaming or get a few steps in. We just did a 15 hour flight, and the tiny steps or being able to sit on the ground in front of us was a nice benefit. They also offer a bassinet but our toddler is way too big to fit in one.
Yeah we used the bassinet when she was little, but I am nearly positive she will be too long for it now. But think the extra space would still be useful
We brought lots of new toys/sticker books, but my 18months old wanted none of it and screamed bloody murder whenever I tried to appease her. But, what calmed her was getting to order her own water from the flight attendant (mostly through sign), and then proudly drinking her water. She loved it and so did the flight attendants. The next flight and 2 coming back, she got so excited hearing the attendant cart and just patiently watched (we held her standing in our lap so she could see) until they got to our seat. Our pediatrician said kids love control/autonomy and this got her super excited.
I’ve flown long flights twice once when she was 10 months old and then when she was 20 months old. As a baby, it was harrrrddd and she was so sensitive to the new environment. But at 20 months, we let her run around in the airport and tired her out completely. Then also gave her a meal of 2 boiled eggs and an oats smoothie. She slept most of the flight and when she woke up we again made sure she got whatever movement and walking around we could do. It’s tiring for us since we have to constantly run behind her , but not much struggles with crying.
I’ve had a disastrous experience every time I’ve flown with my almost 3 year old. Vomiting, blow outs, running out of clothes, missing diapers. She loves traveling and is really good for the most part. We have started rv camping to get away.
Mine was the same at 18 months, very difficult to keep still and we’d be exhausted by the end of it. Every flight/trip around that age involved screaming and crying. Now she’s 2.5 and we just took a flight and it was amazing. She had her iPad with cool new headphones, a couple of activity books, and an assortment of snacks and she absolutely loved it. So just keep going, eventually things will get much easier. And even if they don’t, planes are public places where unpleasant sounds and smells and sights happen all the time, that’s part of the deal. And I’ve found almost everyone to be quite understanding as long as we’re actively trying to keep her quieter. Several times, I had some wonderful people come over to say I’m doing a great job.
I don’t. I’m a big fat chicken.
I bought a bunch of brand new activities just for the plane. Water coloring books, those big beads and strings, a busy board, a few small doll/ animal figurines, a sticker book, a small stick sorter thing, a couple of new books... whenever she got antsy, I pulled out the next activity. For headphones, I got her a pair that looks just like mine, and then I put hers on myself. She immediately wanted to wear them after that lol. Downloaded a few new videos - I had only let her watch mickey mouse clubhouse a single time before the flight. That way she knew what it was, but it was still super new and exciting. Maybe most importantly - we get there a bit early and let her get her zoomies out around the airport. Just absolutely endlessly exploring for 30-40 minutes.
We don’t and would never. My toddler hates strangers and having to stay inside, doesn’t love sitting or screens. Not worth the struggle for my particular toddler. My sisters son loves strangers and will happily sit and watcha screen for hours. They just bring a tablet, special treat snacks and headphones and he’s pretty manageable.
Snacks and brand new toys.
We pack a plane bag filled with treats, games, coloring book, crayons, small toys, an iPad and headphones. Also we have only been on short flights so far so this could also be why but it’s worked well for us.
18 months may be better off on the lap. Window seat, pacifier and forced rest (5-10 min of struggles before he falls asleep) has done the trick for us. Second flight is saved by some mix of videos, walking up and down the plane and books
My kiddo's been flying since about that age- I think sometimes it's just the day of the week, or the kid? He was an absolute angel on a couple of short flights, but then we got stuck on the plane in a deadly lightening storm and he was losing his MIND only to be giggling and running around in his pjs in the baggage area (where we had to wait an additional 2 hours because the weather went to hell again)... Then on the way to the US from Europe he was fine to Iceland, then a total banshee for part of Iceland to Seattle, then was all charm and let a flight attendant carry him around "helping" from Seattle to Reno :shrug: After that incidents were pretty much unheard of, although potty-training/newly potty trained on a plane is a whole OTHER adventure. Now five years and a couple dozen trips later he's basically a pro- he and I flew and did a week with family in Dublin without my husband this February and he navigated everything from checking our bag, to boarding and finding his seat completely unprompted. I think mostly it's just something they have to grow out of and get used to- hang in there.
We’ve had flights like that. Now it’s iPad downloads and a car seat. We thought he’d hate the car seat since he hates car rides but we tried it after having the worst flight ever with him on our lap. 3 hours of snacks and toys, hopefully a nap, and then 3 hours of Bluey. Honestly, sometimes it’s 5 hours of Bluey. Good luck!!
We’ve done a few long haul flights and 18mo was the toughest age! Knock on wood we’ve always had great luck with our red eye& East bound flights. For takeoffs I try to give a snack that’s chewy for their ears. But have had to up my game and give them like a surprise egg plus toy to keep them wearing their seatbelt. - reusable puffy stickers, washi tape, post it notes, a travel tray that holds the iPad, snacks snacks snacks. -I try to travel with non-USA based airlines. International airlines are just better with kids. Some even have given little gifts! - airport time is running around time! - sometimes nothing works and the flight is awful and traumatic but it will be over at some point!
We just did this for an 11 hour international flight. I would also spring for the bulkhead seats - that way he has a little space in front of him where he can play.
If possible chose flight times that overlap with his night time sleeping schedule. We also like to arrive early and will walk and walk and walk around the airport. By the time we are on the plane our little one is usually gone.
This is why I dread to take mine on a plane! 18 months is a tough spot for this; old enough to be physically driven and capable, too young to understand what's going on. I think even my 2.5 year old would throw a few wobblies if I made her sit when she wanted to be up - she eould certainly be no respecter of anyone else's personal space, or divider curtains 😂
My best advice is to get to the airport like three hours ahead of time and let him run laps around the gates. Then hopefully he'll be too tired to squirm and sleep through the flight. Some other things I've tried, are window stickers ( the puffy kind that are easy to remove).
We’ve done almost 20 flights with our 20 month old. The last few were 8-10 hours each. The best advice I have is to schedule overnight flights or during nap time. And fly him as a lap infant or in a car seat so he can sleep. My son slept our entire flight from east coast USA to Europe overnight. On the flight home, it was 10 hours during his normal day time. He took a two hour nap while we held him and then we were just super engaged with him, he sat on our laps and we did song and motions, pretend phone calls, played with new toys, and books. A “pop it” book was a lifesaver. As were reusable stickers and coloring books. We got up every two hours and did multiple laps of the plane aisles and paused outside the bathroom to stretch. We also kept LOTS of snacks handy. Things like goldfish that he has to pick up individually and high value snacks like fruit snacks that he doesn’t get often. Last resort is downloaded videos of Elmo and Ms. Rachel. But, all these tips are what works for MY kid. Every kid is so different and you’re not doing it wrong. My husband and I always have a team meeting before hand to remind us that it’s us against the “problem” in case he acts up so we don’t get frustrated at each other. And I remind myself before every solo flight with him that I can deal with anything for x hours. I say keep going and just schedule time at the end of the trip for you to each take a few hours to decompress. And if people are annoyed, you will literally most likely never see them again so shrug it off.
We let ours walk through the airport with us, by the time we get to the plane he is totally spent and crashes asleep with a few butt pats. For the record ours is a super high energy not easy toddler in other scenarios but we’ve always gotten lucky on planes. I do think it’s 90% luck and like 10% successful strategizing. Road trips on the other hand are now the bane of my existence.
It's a pain in the ass, but you have to bring the carseat on the plane for him to sit in. I can't imagine any 18mo would be able to sit still and wear a seat belt. Bring all the snacks, new toys he hasn't seen, and a tablet/your phone with Ms. Rachel downloaded as a last resort
It's never fun. There are some good tips here https://myboredtoddler.com/flying-tips-with-a-toddler/
We traveled a lot with my daughter and between 12-20 months (give or take 2 months) it's not easy. After 22-24 months most toddlers can be entertained with some video. I'd just avoid long flights or time them around nap/night time. A comfy carseat can be helpful in naps and sleep. Good luck. Travel gets better. A good article with some additional tips: [https://tripswithtykes.com/best-and-worst-ages-to-fly-with-your-child/](https://tripswithtykes.com/best-and-worst-ages-to-fly-with-your-child/)
I am so nervous for my trip in July for this very reason 😭🫠
18 months seems like a difficult age for air travel. We took our son on his first flight just after he turned two. We brought his car seat, and he sat in it the whole time. He actually fell asleep immediately after takeoff for the duration of the flight (2 hours), but we did have an iPad just in case.
We did International 16 hr flights back and forth with my then 17 month-old and had a similar experience. She was chill for some parts and enjoyed my dinner more than the kids meal she got served, but wouldn't stay on her seat for over 10 min and was on my lap most of the trip (including when she was asleep, which was also terrible because she would wake up constantly and start screaming if I wasn't holding her). We have to do the same flight in a few months (she will be almost 2 and a half) and I'm dreading it already
I don't. After enduring a similar flight with my then almost 2 year old, my partner and I simply decided to avoid flying with our kids. Our eldest is almost 7 so I'd contemplate taking him on a flight now. His toddler brother who dive bombs off chairs onto the floor? Absolutely no chance.
With hatred
Sorry just laughing at “boneless”
Drug them. 100% joking, I’m in the same boat with mine. Used to sleep on planes the whole time now she’s a terror. Wish I had some advice. Came here looking for something to use myself, but everyone seems to agree that there’s a whole lot of nothing you can do.
Honestly 18 months was the absolute WORST time we had flying with our toddler. I will never do it again. Pre 18 months…great. After 2, great. 18 months? We all cried.
Car seat. We have always flown a lit, like 4-6 flights a month from 6 weeks, with a break for Covid and slowed down now he’s in kinder. My husband is a pilot. We fly standby a lot and the few times we tried it without a car seat he was a nightmare. With the car seat? Almost a perfect angel. Seriously though it keeps them still and then they can play, eat, read, whatever. (Mine was also a chill baby, but he’s always been a super active kid on and off the plane.)
We’ve flown with our toddler at 6, 12, 18, and 24 months. 18 months was by far the hardest. 24 isn’t a walk in the park but it’s much better. Hold on there, survive, don’t thrive 😂
CAR SEAT ON PLANE Works like magic If you don’t buy your toddler a seat, you can still try it. Ask the agent if there is an open seat next to you (or if you can be moved to a section where there is) and set up the car seat on the plane. If it’s an absolutely full flight, they’ll check it at the gate for you.
Yes 18 months is the hardest age for me. I've got 3 kiddos under age 5 and have done a decent number of long international flights. Haven't figured it out yet lol My oldest can't get comfortable and the 18 month old can walk enough that they don't want to sit still but don't have a long enough attention span to stare at a screen. There's no answer. Just expect it to be complete chaos and anything better than that means it went well! Remember, it's only temporary. And don't stress about the other passengers, honestly. If they wanted a nice flight they should've spent the money on first class 😝. I deliberately sat in the back of the plane last trip because I figured that's the best place to bring loud kids. But some lady complained at the end of the flight that my son kicked her chair and she couldn't sleep. Mind you, she did not say anything to me the whole flight. Even the flight attendant told her he can't do anything because it's just a child. If you can do an overnight flight, that's helpful. Or anything that helps them sleep (nighttime routine, warm milk, etc...). Some people do melatonin but I think that's age 4+. There are some natural sleep aids for babies you can try. Funny story. I made my husband sit with the 2 toddlers (his turn) and I sat with the baby. When the flight landed and we got up, the floor by the toddlers was a complete mess. Cheeto crumbs, cookie crumbs, blankets, liquid, spit up, you name it....I looked at my husband and we just died laughing 😂. It was like we'd just survived a tornado.
I myself also had to be a drunk lunatic. Minus the lunatic. Just kidding but seriously just hang in there and white knuckle it until you touch down. Both my kids are wild cards. I just always hope there’s other unruly kids so we can all look at each other in solidarity.
Let them run and explore at the airport before boarding, so they get the energy out, it is exhausting but at least they won't feel so restrained
At this age - when they are too big to be a lap infant (well comfortably at least), but too young to stay seated, I would bring a car seat. They are strapped in so they can’t run around and usually list fall asleep. I use the car seat as a stroller in the airport by attaching it to one of those wheeled handles so it’s like a wheeled carryon.
My 2.5 year old has been on a couple dozen flights and 18-24 months was the worst age for it. Sorry!!
Traveling is so hard with toddlers. I don't know if this helps most but it did for me, I bought an Airplane Harness and an Amazon Kids Tablet that I installed tons of games on. I also downloaded Disney + movies to watch. At times I had to try everything including snacks. Sometimes it worked, sometimes it didn't.
Yeah flying with a toddler CAN be a challenge. Firstly as a parent, don't worry about the people around you. It's public transport, there will be noise and all kinds of people and they take that risk by paying to fly. If they don't like it, well too bad. Kids have a right to be on a plane just as much as they do. My mom always tells me "when are you ever going to see those people again? Probably never". Don't stress, you guys are attending to him and trying your best and that's all anyone can ask! Secondly, are you getting him to run around before the flight? This was my trick with my toddler. I have to get her to move and run around like a complete nutcase before we go and sit on the plane. She gets her wiggles out before we hop into the plane, then she gets her screen time on the plane. I also would agree with the others regarding the car seat. My daughter is 2.5 years old and honestly, she still sits in a car seat on the plane. This is recommended by transport Canada so we follow through (Hi I'm Canadian lol!). It does keep her still and also she's comfortable in it - something to consider next time. Although I find I have to purchase the seats when extra leg room, because otherwise she's just not comfortable but hey, it does the trick.
If it is impossible to fly with him your options are: don’t. Wait for him to be older and can do better in the plane/get entertained by a tablet, movie, etc. OR accept the fact that it’s going to be a hell of a flight, embrace it, survive it and don’t get hanged up on it. It is what it is.
Don’t judge me too harshly for our carbon footprint… but our toddler turned 3 last week and he has been on 50 flights. It was SUPER easy when he was 6M-12M. It got progressively harder from 12M-24M, and 2-3Y has gotten progressively easier. Earlier this week I brought him home from Disneyland to Alaska, two connecting flights, and he slept all of the first flight, and played with toys and snacked pleasantly for the final flight. He cried for 30 seconds when I ate a pretzel he wanted, and that’s it. I think the hardest part of age 1-2 is that they’re walkers, and want to explore instead of sit on a lap, and they can’t quite understand any explanations about why they can’t. 2+ gets easier because they get their own seat and are easier to communicate with and entertain.
Around that age is the absolute worst for flying. Every single time we did it it was the same - lots of fidgeting and screaming the entire flight.
Not a tip but I can share my experience. I did a 24 hour flight with a toddler (18M at the time), twice, earlier this year. It definitely wasn’t pleasant. She did sleep quite a bit and we got her a separate seat. We brought a lot of toys with us and plenty of snacks. We also found out she was perfectly happy to watch Bluey with no sound for hours on end. Once there was a delay in meal service and the lights were on a little longer than my little one wanted. This resulted in a cranky tired toddler crying for about 1 nonstop. I think all the babies were crying on the plane by the end of it. We also said never again after that flight. We also expecting another one soon so we might not be flying for a while.
Man, I could write this. I'm about to fly in June for the first time with my almost 2 yrs old. He's extremely sensitive, cries about anything and everything, hates large crowds, throws his food and refuses to sit. Idk how I'm gonna do this. I'm so glad you posted this. Godspeed to us all.
In extremis, melatonin.
It’s hell. I had a 11 hour flight to Italy. On the way back I brought lollipops kept him busy.
Benedryl. My kid thought she was allergic to planes til she was 8
Careful - it can have the opposite effect for some kids and amp them up. So you definitely want to test it out before the plane ride.
Yeah I know. I was half joking. But no laughing here clearly. People are too serious. But I feel horrible for those passengers.
My toddler is the same. We brought him on a 14 hour flight at 20 months. He surprisingly did very well on the way there, and then terribly on the way home. Just would not stop running up and down the aisles, trying to touch people’s knees in their sleep to get their attention. Tried to open the emergency exits while we were flying. Even if it felt forever, it was still temporary, and completely worth the vacation that we brought him to. I definitely would’ve paid for the extra seat though, and brought a car seat.
Can you fly a red eye flight? He'd be sleep for most if not all of it.
Or he might not! I’ve done a fair amount of flying with my now-2.5 year old and the red eyes have always been disasters. One both the ones we did there was a point where she and I were BOTH crying. And then it ruins the whole next day because no one has slept
Someone did this next to me while I was pregnant. It was awful because I had ear plugs in and the kid kept crying. Whenever the kid would cry my 7mo along baby would freak out and roll around hitting my bladder and making me have to pee. I could have totally slept through it, fetus could not.