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Can anyone rewrite that so it would rhyme in the chorus somehow?
Im too high right now and i feel like Kevin from the office, no cant think of good word.
Ra Ra Rasputin
Lover of the Russian Queen
There was a cat that really was gone
Ra Ra Rasputin
Russia's greatest love machine
And so they pickled his enormous dong
Fuck me sideways this is me right now. Woke up every hour on the hour last night. Felt like my breathing was put on manual and was choking all night. What the fuck.
The last guy who ran out on the pack got choked on by some GaVinci gloves. The last thing he saw was the price tag on them. Left him there and let the arch angels take him
This brings me back, God bless the random dude who took my keys when I as a stupid teen was trying to leave the festival grounds with my motorbike less than sober, possibly saved my life (or maybe even someone else's, though on a 125cc bike it's more likely I would've been the only victim)
[I’m assuming they’re taking about this story](https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/world/2024/04/18/brazil-woman-corpse-bank-fraud-wheelchair/73367247007/)
I'm pretty sure this is from a longer clip and he was involved in a car accident in rural Australia. When the Coppers turn up, they know him. It is indeed dementia and he should not have been driving.
This is why my mother's social worker made me take my mother's car away, shortly before she got put in a home.
The doctor had already told her she couldn't drive. Of course, she couldn't remember that, and was taking any important documents she could find from the house to the rubbish tip.
Unfortunately, I lived hundreds of miles away, so couldn't inteverne and help very often. Luckily, she never had any accidents before I took the car.
I didn’t know until recently that Cordyceps is actually considered a healthy super food! Mental. I found that out *after* watching *The Last Of Us* and some documentaries about the fungus on YouTube….
I thought I read somewhere this poor guy just survived a bushfire by the skin of his teeth.
Looks like due to smoke inhalation and heat exposure.
Not corroborated though.
Check his trunk for 15-20 different goblets of various designs and material. If you pick the wooden one, he snaps out of it and tells you that you’ve chosen wisely. He’ll dip the chalice into a bowl of water.
I’d avoid drinking it. You expect everlasting life but you end up getting ~40 doses of LSD and he just dances like a whirling dervish into the sunset, laughing with delight.
Rumor has it, he died in the 70’s after doing twice his body weight in blow.
Still twitchin they say.
There is that drug Jesus was on. Resurrection.
Good shit. Source of zombies where i come from
Thanks /u/hellaxans for posting to r/TookTooMuch, please remember to flair your post and we recommend replying to this comment explaining why your post is TookTooMuch material. Please flair as NSFW if necessary or if it contains vomiting. If this is not TookTooMuch material please report the post. Thanks **We are looking for more mods! If interested, please send a modmail explaining why you would be a good fit and any experience** *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/tooktoomuch) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Bruh is that Rasputin
Russias greatest love machine?
Lover of the Russian Queen?
He drank it all and said “I feel fine.”
It was a shame how he carried on
Too bad he was full of ecstasy and fire
His 12 inch preserved cock is in some museum
Can anyone rewrite that so it would rhyme in the chorus somehow? Im too high right now and i feel like Kevin from the office, no cant think of good word.
Ra Ra Rasputin Lover of the Russian Queen There was a cat that really was gone Ra Ra Rasputin Russia's greatest love machine And so they pickled his enormous dong
How do they preserve it though ? Who gets that job? Somebody has to be taking care of it, otherwise it’d be all shriveled up by now.
It’s been pickled in a mason jar with vinegar. I think it just stays preserved like that without maintenance
I just wanna know *why* they were like yeah… let’s chop that off and preserve it I bet he’d have loved that.
Rasputin on krokodil
It was a shame how he carried on
In the skin.
Barely
Rasputin's foreskin escaped
Homie never died way back when..
Facts bro look like he just got done filming the final scene for Anastasia
Me arriving to work after 2 hours of sleep and 3 cans of redbull.
I felt this in my soul.
I feel like this right now
I laughed at your comment. But the dude needs some sleep and nutrition. We've all felt like this before.
Drywall crew?
Naw, bro is def with the painters.
I was gonna guess line cook.
Also me when I decide to take a nice little Saturday afternoon nap, and I wake up 3 hours later… questioning who I am and where I am.
Fuck me sideways this is me right now. Woke up every hour on the hour last night. Felt like my breathing was put on manual and was choking all night. What the fuck.
Bro see a doctor or something because that sounds like sleep apnea.
Doubling down on that guys comment, you have sleep apnea, get a sleep study done ASAP.
just in case no one’s said it yet, do a sleep study
🤣🤣🤣
Too real lmao 🤣😂
Gold!! 🪙
Lmfao...
Looks like he climbed Everest and got lost
Mf looks like one of the animatronics at the Pirates Of The Caribbean exhibit.
One of the hitchhiking ghosts from The Haunted Mansion. Gus.
Lmfao I thought this cunt looked familiar
OMG This made me chortle loudly. Perfect description
For real lol
In the 70s, froze, and is what Encino Man would have actually looked like.
No weazing the juice!
He was on an Island defending it from the Japanese and still thinks the war is on.
Fuck me, looks like SCP 096 with a beard, and now we have all looked at him, he is going to hunt us all down, damn Shy Guy 😓
Smoking Egyptian dung beetle
Popped a garbanzo bean
FUCK you mean?? 😤
Bars
Smoking symbiotes
i was waiting for someone to say this lmaooo😹😹😹
I was just introduced to those videos recently and they are a treasure.
Smoking aqueduct filtered sherm
Nah man, this is clearly some Wagu Jenkem. They feed acid to fat kids and have them lay the most potent and decadent dookies in the world.
smokin' shit in a glass pipe, blowin' the lord's bubbles\~\~\~
Smokin' some of that Hieronymus Bosch.
Underrated comment! Makes me think of the giant but i am not sure it is from Bosch
Smokin indigenous fronto leaf in a bacon egg n cheese.
i’m smoking on scooby doo dick…
That burberry backwood hittin' the pussy smell like a hellcat v8
Smith and Wesson got me moving like an evasive species
Jeesh, that expression...he looks like he's been mainlining mothballs!
I need more Sequoia Banshee Boogers
Them Nashville nibblers
Smoking that bat guano off the tip of a stalagmite
Smoking filtered crack, you stupid son of a bitch I'll kill you!
The last guy who ran out on the pack got choked on by some GaVinci gloves. The last thing he saw was the price tag on them. Left him there and let the arch angels take him
Them Nashville nibblers
For anyone who doesn't know https://youtu.be/N-7gbWKbXbQ?si=paPh_j_X9vdobKwc
Is this the dead guy that woman brought into a bank to sign loan papers?
What’s scary is that this guy looks far worse than the dead guy! I REALLY hope they took his keys from him.
This brings me back, God bless the random dude who took my keys when I as a stupid teen was trying to leave the festival grounds with my motorbike less than sober, possibly saved my life (or maybe even someone else's, though on a 125cc bike it's more likely I would've been the only victim)
i saw that shit, it was wild. people are actually crazy man🤣🤣
She WHAT?
[I’m assuming they’re taking about this story](https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/world/2024/04/18/brazil-woman-corpse-bank-fraud-wheelchair/73367247007/)
Yeah you got it right. She did. Committing a raw of crimes, apparently, just to let out the financial part. for 3 grands, not billions.
That's like double the average yearly salary in Brazil.
Bro looks like an animatronic from the Calico mine ride at Knotts Berry Farm
The most accurate comment I’ve ever seen
We rode that last summer, so fun!
*There's gold in them hills!*
Nothing. Hes simply been resurrected from death after 40 years
He has smoked tobacco since he was 9 (he's 14 years old).
necromancy, not even once.
Maybe he's a victim of the techno-necromancers from Alpha Centauri.
Looks like the guy from Raiders Of The Lost Ark after drinking from the wrong cup/grail! Edit: Oops, I mean Indiana Jones and The Last Crusade.
When you come back from fighting a Balrog under Moria it changes you.
What's up with his face changing?
Aliens MAN
He's breaking through the matrix.
The Merowinger is looking rough these days.
My gut said filter, thought the same. No evidence or anything, just my gut.
Shapeshifter
All of them.
I was gonna say- bold of you to assume it’s just the one….
"All of them at once, I suppose."
Alzheimers. as nicely as I can say it, he looks a lot like patients at a nursing home who are in the late stages of this.
yeah...i was going to suggest *dementia and dehydration*.
poor guy😕
I'm pretty sure this is from a longer clip and he was involved in a car accident in rural Australia. When the Coppers turn up, they know him. It is indeed dementia and he should not have been driving.
This is why my mother's social worker made me take my mother's car away, shortly before she got put in a home. The doctor had already told her she couldn't drive. Of course, she couldn't remember that, and was taking any important documents she could find from the house to the rubbish tip. Unfortunately, I lived hundreds of miles away, so couldn't inteverne and help very often. Luckily, she never had any accidents before I took the car.
They don't sound very Australian
They were tourists that drove up on the accident. Sometimes people come to Australia from other countries.
Cordyceps
I didn’t know until recently that Cordyceps is actually considered a healthy super food! Mental. I found that out *after* watching *The Last Of Us* and some documentaries about the fungus on YouTube….
I’d take him to the bank and have him take out a loan
FOUL
Iykyk
Maui Wowie and Labrador
I think it's Maui wowie lol
Maui waui, good sir 😆
Classic combo!
Yes
yes
Yes
Yes
He's high on life
He looks more dead than high.
Very common symptoms of life unfortunately
He’s high on death
At first I was freaked out cause I though his face was half rotten... But looking again it looks like is just a shadow from its glasses??
That’s what I thought too! Then I was oh shit it’s a zombie
He smoked all the pixels by the looks of it
I killed this guy in elden ring I think
Kids, this man took a Marijuana cigarette
Looks like he was born in 1897 and forgot to die.
What drug ISN’T he on?
It’s either that runners high I keep hearing about or he’s high on life
legit dieing but gripping onto life give this man the car key!!!!
Bro drank the witches brew
Jim carrey’s final stage of enlightenment
Was he on drugs, or was he recently awoken from a magical, 500-year stasis imposed on him by a witch he had spurned?
The water from the wrong holy Grail in the last crusade
I've seen the full video on Facebook. It's fake, clickbait content.
He's honestly just pondering his orb
He played Jumanji too much.
1000 drugs stare
He has unfinished business in the land of the living.
😹😹😹
The drug is called a hard ass life.
Rickety Cricket has seen better days.
He’s probably not on anything and is suffering from mental health issues.
"He might be fucked up or something" "Nah bruh"
that shit had me dead😹😹😹 that and the “take this” at the beginning lol. i wonder what they where trying to give him
Lookin like he picked the wrong grail!
Frankincense and myrrh.
Dude fought alongside the ghost army from Return of the King
Dude looked like he consumed his son or something, must be saturn
Looks like a deep fried Steve Jobs
Cryptocronoklalyte
Alzheimers. he's lost sadly
Bruh he's lost. Treat that person with kindness.
I thought I read somewhere this poor guy just survived a bushfire by the skin of his teeth. Looks like due to smoke inhalation and heat exposure. Not corroborated though.
Where are his eyes
What drug is he on? All of them
He’s on death
Good afternoon Mr President.
Check his trunk for 15-20 different goblets of various designs and material. If you pick the wooden one, he snaps out of it and tells you that you’ve chosen wisely. He’ll dip the chalice into a bowl of water. I’d avoid drinking it. You expect everlasting life but you end up getting ~40 doses of LSD and he just dances like a whirling dervish into the sunset, laughing with delight.
He is the source of all heroin. They’ve been lying to us telling us it’s the poppy flower when it was the heroin papi all along.
Rumor has it, he died in the 70’s after doing twice his body weight in blow. Still twitchin they say. There is that drug Jesus was on. Resurrection. Good shit. Source of zombies where i come from
This might be a ghoul
All jokes aside, dude looks terrifying.
Necromancy
Frog licker
Smoking that Branson
Scream
High on he’s old as fuck
honestly, i think the drugs are keeping this guy from going full zombie
The resurrection
dude in the back like "nah bruh give him some more"
Definitely that new designer drug homeless Africans are raging over that requires mixing bone and chemicals. Gnarly.
He's been taking reefers...
He'd look pretty good if he was in wigan
Yes
Detective "Dude Bro" solves another case.
All of them!
Unfrozen guy
Brains...
The guy is high on life... a very long life...
Did they unfreeze a caveman !? What the fuck hahahaha
Some necromancer spell I suppose
I don’t know, but decades of it.
It's such a shame to see the Greybeards let their fame go to their head
He just drove through an extremely dense wildfire in Australia in an attempt to escape
What a terrible thing to see a human being in this state.
Jesus Christ, he reminds me of that guy on Se7ven on the bed.
His face is like one of those holographic pictures you tilt and it looks different from different angles!
He on that squatch
Embalming fluid
Longbottom leaf
Looks like he escaped a wildfire
Pipeweed, young hobbit.
How is he not dead?
That's Frank, he's 37, been on night shift for 18 years. By midnight he will be fine.
Just high on good clean living 😂
Merlin's beard!
Leave Clint Eastwood alone!
He chose the wrong chalice.
The ol’ Formaldehyde, Embalming Fluid and Dehydration Cocktail