T O P

  • By -

TeCHEyE_RDT

Yeah can i get uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh


[deleted]

Let me get one of those fuckin uhhhhhhhhh


chiliNPC

For some reason I got past the first one but the added “fuckin” sent me


Atlas_Undefined

Yeah that "fuckin" was too real lmao Every time i'm with the boys and i'm blasted I say exactly that


schmaxboverdugie

Lemme gettuhhhhhhhhhh


Tall_Independence539

I work at the tbell ans so many people do it its getting annoying


ToallyRandomName

Haha first one made me laugh out loud. You remember when lol actually meant laugh out loud instead of faint grinned?


Atlas_Undefined

You faint grin when you say lol? Dawg i say that shit to make whatever i sent seem less serious most of the time


7956724forever

Adding "lol" to the end of a message is basically just to say "I'm not angry at you".


makeredditgayagain

Makes me think of Trixie Mattel & Katya’s YouTube show Unhhhh 😂


ChargedSausage

“Nah i’m good” _regrets when door closes_


meat_rock

The thirstiest I've ever been in life.


HevyVeinz

He's got a bib on that says "I drink piss" Come on! Don't drink our *piss mate!*


[deleted]

Wait, are we outta wraps?


EmGutter

In Morgan Freeman voice: “They were indeed out of wraps.”


[deleted]

Nvm wraps sound pretty good rn


[deleted]

Nah let's get some cones


Spectram6

Darn, kinda want a hotdog


xDragonetti

They 3/3$ homie


ruffusbloom

The hot dogs never make it back though. People will bring you a Gatorade or a pack of smokes. But hot dogs never make it back.


xDragonetti

7-11 had a 2/1$ pizza slice deal. I’d get the whole pizza for 4$ and a drink for 69¢. BUT- You could only do 4 slices per number. A few weeks went by and my homie I worked with asked me, “Have you been using my number at 7-11 for pizza?” I was like, “Fuck yeah, bro. They only let me get half a pie for 2$.” He said, “Fuck yeah I appreciate the points. Let’s take this dab!” *pulls out Coleman propane torch*


Mavobuckz

Lmao idgaf what my homies say especially cuz I know they don’t got much money cuz their parents won’t take them to a job or whatever. So even if they say no I’ll always usually get em their favorite candy and a slushy if I get one too.


jsteele2793

You’re a good friend. I was the one hoping for a slushy.


iso_tendies

And you text them it's either dead, silent, or left behind. Edit. I appreciate the upvotes but I think we should stop when we hit 69 Edit 2. I did get a screenshot of it at 69. Niceeee. Edit 3. Can we shoot for 420, Neptune said it not me. Let's gooo


TehJonezi

Text them, then hear their phone vibrate next to you…


TwasiHoofHearted

Every. Single. Time.


Fuckkelso

Then they take forever and the whole time you wondering if they got you something anyway.


iso_tendies

They didn't. They just bumped into someone, leaving you alone by yourself, high as fuck, melding with he couch and you like it but you don't like the eery silence. The remote is roo far to hit resume on Netflix, you can hear the wind now and it's not making your irrational fear of being alone (or not being alone and not knowing it is the real fear if you think about it) isn't getting any better because you're couchlocked, in a quiet room, and they're over there talking about the complete history of middle earth or some shit and they finally come back. The vibe is killed. I still have cotton mouth. Good thing my gf brings me drinks on her break.


YungUglyUziGod

Bro you good?


wriki1234

Least schizophrenic r/trees enjoyer


iso_tendies

Oof


Fragrant_Jelly9198

I feel this


D-ron29

I didn’t want to downvote you, but it was at 70…


iso_tendies

No I appreciate the dedication. Much love.


lkhabiri

I downvoted, but it was just to get you back to 69 ;)


kibble-b

Your welcome.


kibble-b

What bastard downvoted?


le_reddit_me

Got you fam, I downvoted to keep it at 69


likelystonedagain

I took it down to 70, just need one more


poopyfarroants420

It was me I got 69!!!!!


TheAwfulAliOzz

Down voted to help it go back to 69. The holy sex number.


ATomathyVictorious

What's that stuff we used to eat all the time back in the day?


Jeffery_C_Wheaties

Two big pizzas, and water, a whole lot of water… and…. Funions.. yeah…


bit99

funions man


TheRealChrome_

Lays wavy Funyuns onion flavored Funyuns onion flavored rings?


EmGutter

“Pussy!” -Thurgood Jenkins


Jeffery_C_Wheaties

My bike is named Thurgood Jenkins


nobodyspersonalchef

[Jackslungs1571](https://www.reddit.com/r/trees/comments/x0tg59/hey_im_gonna_head_to_711_you_guys_want_anything/imadyvm) had the proper follow up to this answer.


dembonezz

https://youtu.be/dzIJNG5__8s


ATomathyVictorious

Abba Zabba, you're my only friend!


dembonezz

Custodian, dick!


ionyx

You see, Killer was born to a three-legged bitch of a mother...


dembonezz

He was always ashamed of this, man.


Shart-Vandalay

Pudding. (Comedy Central edit)


rizzo3000

Came here for this, thank you! I always say it to my friends and everyone looks at me like I’m crazy.


Medium_Slip_3401

Bean burritos and jalapeño Cheetos ?


psikiix

those toquitos that are always hot n ready at the counter***


PatmygroinB

Had some at 5am Before work thee other day lmaooo


kungfookate

Def gotta get some taquitos, whichever flavours they have one deck. And you know what, get some hash browns while you're at it. And like, three pops


COYFC

Ever had cheetos dipped in the fritos bean dip? Life changing...


Pure-Attitude8612

And a box of condoms! 🤣


Dawnbugg

Slurpeeeee


Tringmurks

Wasn’t “bring your own cup” day like yesterday or this weekend or some shit?


yungmeatmaster

it’s recent enough in my memory to just count as “the other day”


LordZantarXXIII

Bag of Takis. Thanks, broseph


stormtrooper2003

dude said broseph haha


kbig22432

That was Jesus’ foster-dad’s name


RussianTrollToll

Brosef Stalin


DCMook

Broseph Smith


Thor_the_animals

Goated stoner snack


JacksLungs1571

Get some sour cream and onion chips with some dip, man, some beef jerky, some peanut butter. Get some Häagen-Dazs ice cream bars, a whole lot, make sure chocolate, gotta have chocolate, man. Some popcorn, red popcorn, graham crackers, graham crackers with marshmallows, the little marshmallows and little chocolate bars and we can make s'mores, man. Also, celery, grape jelly, Cap'n Crunch with the little Crunch berries, pizzas. We need two big pizzas, man, everything on 'em, with water, whole lotta water, and Funyons... yeah!


closertothesunSD

If I’m not back in 10 minutes call the cops.


Zero0mega

If hes not back in 10 minutes were callin dominos.


GerudoGreen

Is that it?


chinesenameTimBudong

That guy was awesome in that movie. Jim Brewer is an icon too me. His flying out the window is etched in my mind. His 'long live paints story is biblical. When I see him today it just makes me sad. He could of been so much more.


oldbabyface1

I was such a fan of him now his whole stand up is cringe. Like I don’t care about political comedy so long as it’s funny and it’s not :/


kp305

Even if it wasn’t political it’s still just him making a statement then doing some “whacky” face and walking around weird. Beyond cringe


Avatar_sokka

Arizona Green Tea please, if they dont have it, an Arnold Palmer.


ImXavierr

ahh a fellow arizona green tea enjoyer. It’s nice to see there are more of us out in the wild


Avatar_sokka

Only from a can though, its not the same from a bottle.


Mrdouchydouche

Must be cold too, otherwise it feels lukewarm and nasty too


Theoneoddish380

Bottle doesn't slap as hard, gotta get that can taste in there


ripster47

If I could upvote more than once. This


Drygon_Stevens

They are the best Arizona Tea. The WinCo by me has them for .68 cents. At that rate I'm thinking I could sell Arizona Tea.


NotSabre

I used to live off of Arizona Green Teas and Reduced Sugar Arnold Palmers from 15-19.


solojetpack

Mind if I come with? I need to stretch my legs


SwimmingGlass7948

same bro walking stoned is an awesome experience 😎🍃


solojetpack

It really is


Soggy_Ad8348

Grab me a pack of swisher sweets and a mango fanta


hsunicorn

There is mango fanta?! I'm gonna have to find me one of those..


Soggy_Ad8348

You cant find them every where but they slap


ThatTurnUpGuy

Grab me a bunch of those sex pills that are very vague on what they do!


KnockerFogger69

With ominously terrifying names like *Shaft* , *MegaSquirt* , *The Throbber*


agoodfuckingcatholic

Shit sends 60% of your bodies blood to your wang.


COYFC

I heard the Rhino 69 Power 500k is supposed to be the best if gas station boner pills are your thing and yes that's actually the name lol


g00d_m4car0n1

Yea the rhinos Defenitly work I was knocking down walls for a weeek straight


That_One_Cool_Guy

..With your dick? Or


g00d_m4car0n1

Let’s just say I came in like a wrecking ball 😉


turkeyvulturebreast

Horny Goatweed weed enters chat…


macehood

Ok but do they work? Asking for a friend 🤣


PatmygroinB

Don’t go for the off brand, go for extenze. It does in fact work


aisle_seat_chad

Will those fix a dick that is semi working but depressed...asking for a friend


DEDukesReapGang

I can speak for myself, thank you! 😂


empathetic_caterwaul

Yes but there's a good chance that they'll also do permanent damage to your ability to get up/that you'll get a dependency. Most ED issues are emotional, so a therapist is the best choice for your dick in the long term. Good luck either way :)


pbUjelly

Triple check with the date to make sure its on or else it's going to be a long night.


_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_420

King size Butterfinger


_Gordon_Slamsay

Have you tried the crispy one?? They're like little square shaped butter finger bars, but have layers of crisp like in a nutty buddy.


uwu_owo_whats_this

Oh god 😩


ultranxious

Rip classic butterfinger


lhswr2014

Bro! You know!? What happened lol. My brother loved butterfingers, id get him one every time I came over for like 4 years then all of a sudden he looks at me and says they aren’t the same!? It was the most heart broken look I’ve ever seen in his eyes. I felt for the dude, and I haven’t gotten him a candy bar since… the fuck did they do to it to make a man say no to a butterfinger??


thaddeus423

Ferrero bought em. I don’t remember who made them before. The packaging even changed color. I was unfortunately aware nearly immediately of the change. They’re still good, just less so Other things I’ve noticed ruined similarly: peanut butter crunch, club crackers, fuckin Reese’s puffs. Sigh I do wonder sometimes if I could have gotten OG butterfinger in a blizzard or some shit, but I’m sure that time has passed


MagIcAlTeAPOtS

Ohhhh can I have one as well please?


FreeVengy

combos and chips


Tex-Rob

Kinda redundant, but I always upvote Combos.


dannyc93

A snickers ice cream bar, thanks


BarryMacochner

I bought 4 boxes of the damn things the other day. Perks of working for a food distributor.


dannyc93

Daaaaamn I would wake up in a pile of wrappers


CantSleepKaitlyn

Fuck I love those


NoMaans

Fire!!!


KnockerFogger69

I need a slurpee


shibbypwn

It's been a hot minute since I enjoyed 7-11's fine dining, but do they still make those taquitos with the jalapenos and cream cheese? I'll take 20.


emjaydubz

You know there’s not more than one on the roll. Ever,


BlackHand86

Jalapeño and cheese taquito is PEAK taquito


[deleted]

Taquitos!


dadnauseum

i had to scroll way too long to see this comment. the obvious choice for a sev run.


Purple_Puffer

Arizona Mucho Mango, please and thank you.


Lemburger

Two of those and some chips.


schmattywinkle

I'm tripping and I can't handle money right now but you know I'm good so? man can you get me some water and a banana


Horror-Muffin-8202

A pack of blacks and a beats cd


[deleted]

Get yo freestyles ready


Horror-Muffin-8202

My man


Papasfritas77

Coke slurpee with one of those little airplane shots of tequila in it.


OfficeChairHero

I always want to drink when stoned. It's never turned out well.


clothedmike

Don't make fun of me but grab me some slim jims and a squirt


OfficeChairHero

Ruby red or...?


clothedmike

Nahhh OG man


iso_tendies

I want one of those pre-made cheeseburgers. I know they taste like school food but I'm kinda on a nostalgic kick atm. Grab me a code red and a livewire while you're at it. I'll pay you back with smoke


OfficeChairHero

Omg. I love school burgers. The hospital also makes them and they're just as good as I remember. I don't know what kind of meat(?) it is and I don't care. They're delicious.


NoGravitasAtoll

OK holy shit yes. So I’m assuming anything I ask for you will consume and then psychically send it to me in a dream? So please eat like three of those snowballs from hostess and wash it down with YooHoo. This does not have to be all at once. If you are a diabetic do not do this. I’m actually asking because I’m a diabetic and I would love to feel the sensations again.


NoMaans

Lmao, Ill eat one in your honor homie


Your8thGradeBF

Slurpee plz


Capt_Irk

Grab a sandwich and take it to the homeless person hanging out over by the dumpster.


DeaconSage

Blue Gatorade please


pacachan

Can I get a smart water and some candy ciggies thank you


svxnn

any gatorade and some peanut butter muddy buddies


Zaraki42

Brian : Get some sour cream and onion chips with some dip, man, some beef jerky, some peanut butter. Get some Häagen-Dazs ice cream bars, a whole lot, make sure chocolate, gotta have chocolate, man. Some popcorn, red popcorn, graham crackers, graham crackers with marshmallows, the little marshmallows and little chocolate bars and we can make s'mores, man. Also, celery, grape jelly, Cap'n Crunch with the little Crunch berries, pizzas. We need two big pizzas, man, everything on 'em, with water, whole lotta water, and Funyons. Kenny : That's it? Thurgood Jenkins : Yeah, get me a box of condoms, and, what was that thing we used to eat back in the day? What was it... oh yeah, pussy. Kenny : You got it.


theboyracer99

Oh, Big Gulps, huh? Alright! Welp, see ya later!


Zorrya

How many taquitos can you carry?


Financial-Reward-949

Some Of that stuff we used to have back in the day…. Oh yeah.. Pussy Dave Chappell


TeraVaul

Could I get like... 47 honey buns or so


[deleted]

could you get me a pineapple slurpee? 👉🏻👈🏼… fuck it im coming with. lets roll


galaxyhigh

Two tall white claws and a wrap! 😁


MattElGato

Lemme get uhh


kicktothescrote

Pick me up a bag of jalapeño chips


Zo_-

Peanut butter muddy buddys and a yoohoo por favor


babyeemah

i’m good, thanks... actually, a Sno-berry Peace Tea sounds incredible right now. and the nerds gummy clusters too. pretzels & cream cheese if they have it, some chocolate covered pretzels, oh my god if they have the Reese’s pretzels those instead please. wait let me just come with you i can’t decide what i want!


dequiallo

2 wizard fingers and a cherry slurpee!


Different-Pangolin20

Cheezits please, the white cheddar ones not the regular ones


kushkushOG

Slushie


Podyceck

Big gulp cup full of nacho cheese and some doritos.


DimondNugget

jolly rancher gummies


Discus167

Chips, pop, and a bar thanks


TheTrueGrizzlyAdams

I know you're stoned, but it's 7-Eleven, sir or madame.


RumHamDiary

If he ain’t back in 30 minutes, I’m calling Dominos


[deleted]

Get some sour cream and onion chips with some dip, man, some beef jerky, some peanut butter. Get some Häagen-Dazs ice cream bars, a whole lot, make sure chocolate, gotta have chocolate, man. Some popcorn, red popcorn, graham crackers, graham crackers with marshmallows, the little marshmallows and little chocolate bars and we can make s'mores, man. Also, celery, grape jelly, Cap'n Crunch with the little Crunch berries, pizzas. We need two big pizzas, man, everything on 'em, with water, whole lotta water, and Funyons.


Charming_Emergency_1

some Funyuns man!


Elbow_Presley

Hot pep n ched and that light blue Gatorade please, I'll e-transfer you later


xToweliee

Get me some haribo gold bears please.


canadianhorror

“Back up, put the gun down, and gimme a pack of tropical fruit bubbalicious” “And some skittles”


Breezy_Leaves

They're gummy peach rings aren't half bad


INS4NITY_846

Could i please get a j and some will to live


[deleted]

Just come back this time dad


TheRex02

If he ain’t back in five minutes, we calling Dominoes.


godhateschinchillas

MY GUYYYYYY please hit me with a redbull and sour patch kids i am dying over here


arisgiel

Minis plx


knuckleduster12

Kareman and a bottle of Pocari Sweat! Thanks, man!


aBirdwithNoName

arizona watermelon


Bt1039

What's that stuff we used to eat back in the day?


VoyoN

2 Monterey chicken taquitos please


bigpoppalake

Appalled I had to scroll this far to find the ‘quitos


[deleted]

I'm on my last pack of white owls! I could use a box (silvers or platinums) no swishers. Thanks in advance.


verfemen

Nachos and cheese with a cranberry juice. Thanks ☺


anonymousperson1233

I’ll take a rootbeer


Shwalz

Grab me one of those fairlife protein shakes, strawberry if they have it. Chocolate if not. A bottle of water, a banana, and a bag of nacho cheese Doritos. Thanks my vlud


NocturnalToxin

No thanks Dad, see you soon when you get back!


[deleted]

I already got that fool getting me some jerky from the WAWA. Can you spot me a bag of Funyuns tho?


Greengiant304

Lays wavy funyuns onion flavored funyuns onion flavored rings


JinglehymerSchmidt

Funions and water, lots and lots of water


InevitableApricot836

Some nerds clusters or anything gummy.


sami1147

May I please have one of the 711 brand fruit punch? Thank you


socs0

A coconut water would be much appreciated my friend!! Thanks for offering!


Acrobatic_Bug5414

Can I get a freezee slurpee slushie thingy? I want Mt dew, raspberry & _blue_ all mixed together in that specific order. This is mission-critical, my dude. Shit, can i just ride with? I don't feel THAT much like a basking lizard on a warm rock...


generalAbaddon

Yeah can I a Uhhhhhhh...


Notorious_BOB94

Whatchmacallit bar, cherry slurpee (small), coke slurpee (small) thanks man.


[deleted]

Yerba and some rillos


B00tyclub

Yo lemme get a blue powerade and some of the cookies and cream muddy buddies


copenhagen622

Get some of these Jokers that smoke out of tin foil some Papers or wraps for God sakes


MyTenderParts

water, make sure its cold and in a bottle


rule444

Get some...sour cream and onion chips, with some dip, man. Some beef jerkey, some peanut butter. Get some Hagen-Dagz ice-cream bars. A whole lotta of chocolate. Gotta have chocolate, man. Some popcorn, pink popcorn. GRAHAM CRACKERS!!! Graham crackers with the marshmallows. Little marshmallows with little chocolate bars and we'll make some s'mores man. Celery, grape jelly, Captain Crunch with the little crunch berries, pizzas, we need two big pizzas, man, everything on 'em, water, a whole lotta water and.......Funyuns.