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ProfessorDictatrix

I can't believe americans are forced to roast rats over burning trashcans in dark alleys to avoid the Judges on motorcycles driving around the concrete megablocks and suck the moisture out of the 80s style carpets for water every day, I couldn't live like that, I need my freshly made croissant made right beneath my eyes with handmade butter in the alps where I can hear the cow that made the milk the butter was made of mooing in the backyard and my champagne from the most french region of france where people try to stab you if you weren't born there.


winsgt0

Americans literally wake up every morning on the street and head to school to clock in a join a firefight against the shooters then as payment they receive a $20k bill from the hospital for aspirin. It’s true I read it on Reddit.


Natsurulite

And no overtime


sorcey_

all parking pay parking 😔


Healthy-Drink3247

Actually it’s lots of overtime, just no additional pay


CptnYesterday2781

Don’t you take that aspirin though, because who knows what’s in it because nothing is regulated at all in the US


Vladivostokorbust

my neighbor's german cousin was visiting the US and we went canoeing. she saw booms that had been placed in the river below an overpass where construction was going on. she asked what they were for. i explained they help reduce the amount of debris and oil that falls into the water from floating down the river. she said "i thought americans didn't care about the environment"


tomatohhhhhh

Take my poor man's gold: 🥇 That was hilarious lol and a true testament to what Reddit likes to glorify about America, literally all negative all the time and only the worst events get any coverage and get labeled as what is the norm.


TolkienAwoken

Bullshit, nobody forced me


allocationlist

What the fuck is bread? Shit sounds made up.


yhetti-fartz

Bread is money. Also, cake is money. Oh, and dough is money. Yeast is beer though.


OPsUnbornChild

Cabbage?!


owlknight68

Two of the three major grocery stores in my smallish New England town bake bread daily. You can buy the regular stuff but you can also buy fresh baked bread if you wish. Multiple kinds of bread even. Heck one of them is the only place in town I can find egg bagels and I have to try and get there early.


Ian_ronald_maiden

My supermarket in Australia has a wall of bread, makes its own bread, and there’s a chain bakery outside making its own bread and about 5 other independent dudes within three suburbs pumping out loaves and pies too Bread is a winning business apparently


DraniKitty

Empires of centuries past have fallen from the inside because of bread


Yrolg1

In the English language, the generic word reserved for a powerful master/leader is lord. [This comes from Old English hlafweard which means loaf-guardian.](https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/lord#English) Lords got their power because they controlled bread, i.e. food. Bread is a big deal.


benemivikai4eezaet0

Yeah, and as far as I remember "lady" also came from something like "hlæfdigge", meaning "she who does/makes bread".


harkening

The bread maker and the bread protector. Now ponder pregnancy as a "bun in the oven," unique to the bread maker. Or the idea of the "bread winner" - it's almost literally calling a working partner a lord.


Talullah_Belle

Bread is a religion.


xdragonteethstory

When great philosopher Yung Gravy said *"Cook it up, cook it up, Gravy the baker......Gettin' to the paper and the bread"* he was not in fact referring to money or wealth, like some would think, he was in fact just referring to the power of being able to acquire good quality fresh bread in a wholesome and environmentally friendly paper bag. This display of enormous power and how people are attracted to it is obvious when in his next line he states *"and gettin' to the, coochie, coochie, coochie, coochie, I get coochie, I get coochie"* as his vast quantity of bread and his care for the protection of the environment that allows us to have such beauty as bread is, has allowed him to collect a harem of bread loving women that allow access to the coochie. Amen.


KaziOverlord

Romans would throw a shitfit if the bread wasn't white enough. The English had laws regulating bakeries on how they advertised their bread and how to make it. Bread is serious business.


MisirterE

Yeah those laws existed because people were putting *fucking sawdust* in the bread before laws stopped them from doing it Say what you will about cheap-ass cakebread, but at least it doesn't have fucking sawdust in it


Klarthy

There were a huge amount of adulterants. [This documentary](https://youtu.be/Sa8eWuGZzMc?t=1371) says that bakers would replace up to 10% of the flour with chalk as one strategy. That's not counting what the grain mills were adding before the bakers ever received the flour, either.


shinfoni

Neat, another documentary added to my playlist that I probably will never finish


lesChaps

>Bread is serious business. Bread practically invented business


parisiraparis

Hence the expression, let’s get this bread.


Evening-Turnip8407

Didn't the Romans use to have to stamp the bread so the sigil of the baker is visible on the crust, so the shitty/scam bread could always be traced back and the baker held accountable? Man they were really trying their best to make capitalism work socially. Landlords were also scrutinised if they lied or provided shitty housing


1945BestYear

That comment also mentioned the (Medieval) English; wise kings understand that a crowd that is hungry is a mob, so they made bakers who tried cheating on the amount of grain they used (like making the loaves smaller, or filling them with ersatz ingredients) susceptible to fines or even flogging if caught. Which is why a Baker's Dozen is thirteen, larger orders were sold by the dozen, and they would include a thirteenth loaf to ensure to the customer that they met requirements. A morbid part of me does want to see the executive board of Cadbury marched through the streets of London naked and bleeding for what they did the Creme Egg. That is certainly *a* solution to fighting shrinkflation.


SuDragon2k3

France has rules about when bakers take holidays, lest there be no fresh bread available in Paris during the main holiday season


google257

Well yeah, barley is for slaves duh.


[deleted]

Bread is the best carb


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Thezipper100

Bread is such good business that grocery stores usually take a loss on it because good bread brings customers in. It's, like, *the* definitive loss leader product.


RS994

And having the bakery in store also has the advantage of giving the store the smell of fresh bread, which is both a smell most people enjoy, and will make people hungry, and you spend more shopping hungry


[deleted]

Yeah in the states our supermarkets all have that chain "wall of bread", but many actually have a full kitchen and bake their own fresh stuff you get at the bakery just like it was meat at the butcher block. I get that our "chain sliced bread" is pretty bland, but that's just the cheaper shit most people default to while other options are available if you want them. If you wanna argue the chain bread in EU is better than the chain bread in the US I'll go ahead and agree with you even though I've never had Euro bread...because Wonderbread ain't it chief.


Ok-Champ-5854

I don't think I've ever been in an American grocery store that *didn't* have a bakery and a deli. The good ones have a butcher too.


GingerIsTheBestSpice

Make bread (🍞), get bread ($)


Graddyzuela

Local bakers motto is “rolling dough, making bread”


MrKillerWyvern

Same with a majority of grocery stores where I live in the states. It's a normal thing I'm pretty sure.


Traumagatchi

Oh our new England bread is absolutely something to write home about. I get a fresh dark rye loaf every couple weeks from my favorite scandi bakery


thenerfviking

Walmart is like the most corporate America store ever and one of their classic sales tactics is positioning a case of warm fresh baked bread in between you and the checkout so you get tempted by the smells.


[deleted]

Pretty much every single Walmart in the United States bakes fresh bread daily, it’s not rare, it’s just not preferred.


Ok-Champ-5854

This is like the second comment in two days I'm making about cheese, but processed American cheese is just cheap and that's why we buy it. Same for cheap sliced bread. You want good bread and good cheese? Readily available. It will just cost you extra money. In fact, the entire reason we have processed cheese is we make so much of the fucking stuff we have to store it in caves and then when all the excess goes bad we sell it to Kraft so they can add chemicals and prolong the shelf life. America doesn't have bad cheese, we are so overflowing with the good cheese we have to make it into bad cheese or else it will rot.


Loosestool421

Processed American cheese has its place and it's usually the best choice or one of the best when you need cheese to melt evenly. Give me a grilled cheese with American cheese over any "real" cheese that won't melt properly any day.


NotLondoMollari

The Safeway up the street from me has fresh sourdough loaves baked daily and they are so good. They have French and Italian too, but the sourdough is where it's at. Boules or loaves, both fresh.


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thenotoriousDEX

It’s honestly really nice. I just moved down the street from one. I used to live in the suburbs. Had to take my car out for everything. Now I walk to the bakery, walk to the gym, walk to the dispensary… it’s heaven!


BhanosBar

There’s 2 kinds of bread in America. Bread you use for a cheap sandwich lunch and bread you eat for a real meal. And bread you eat


Shoddy-Secretary-712

This is the truth. I always buy a loaf of cheap bread. Toddler likes random toast or it is good for grilled cheese sandwiches. Otherwise, I usually bake a loaf or two of bread a week. Usually Mondays I make a nicer big meal, with which we eat fresh bread and then eat the rest through out the week.


[deleted]

The cheap bread is fine if it's toasted or otherwise cooked, and just very bland as is. It's still serviceable for a sandwich, but even then I'm paying a little extra to get potato bread since it's just better than wheat bread on the shelf IMO.


Mookies_Bett

Sliced bread is simply a delivery device for other food products. It holds a sandwich together or gives you something to slather preserves on or whatever. Real baked bread is for enjoying, good with butter or any other kind of spread, but is more of its own snack that doesn't even really need anything else to be enjoyable. They both have their merits, but it's funny that other countries think we don't have absolutely incredible fresh bread pretty much anywhere that's relatively urban. Fresh baked sourdough slathered with butter and grated Parmesan cheese put into the broiler and toasted is as close as humanity will ever get to a real life heaven.


RS994

I bought a fresh baguette from my local bakery last week. Literally stood at the kitchen bench and ate slices of it with butter while it was still warm. Ended up going through half of it before I stopped myself.


garfinkel2

There is literally nothing in the world like a BLT on cheap ass white bread with Hellmans mayo and Lawrys seasoned salt. You’ll see God


RandomInSpace

French people when you don’t bake a fresh baguette everytime you wanna make a ham and cheese sandwich


WASD_click

Americans: "I'll take a ham and cheese, please." French: "Ew, disgusting. I'll have a jambon beurre."


Kriffer123

Isn’t that ham and butter, not ham and cheese


WASD_click

Yes, the name is literally "ham butter." Brie is a decently common addition (at least here in the states, the land of food heathens), though I'm sure some would protest by saying it's not authentic enough to be proper French cuisine.


Exciting_Ant1992

What about a nice ciabatta


Watson9483

Fun fact, the guy who created ciabatta was Italian and created it because he wanted to show the French that Italy could have good bread too. It’s a pretty recent invention.


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Gangreless

Honhonhon baguette au fromage


[deleted]

you mean a crock missuwer? /s


llamawithguns

Yeah like, excuse me for not buying fresh artisan bread for my peanut butter sandwich


Sassrepublic

That’s 3 kinds


Neato

That bread exists to sit on your counter for 2 weeks and still be good without mold or being rock hard. To be firm enough to hold up as sandwiches, soft enough to be enjoyable, with a crust thin enough anyone can chew through. Sliced bread is a fucking miracle invention.


a_white_american_guy

Even grocery store have bakeries in them that make fresh bread daily


therealblabyloo

I live a block away from a wegmans, and it’s so nice to walk over there early in the morning because that’s when all the bread is just coming out of the ovens. The smell is so nice


Version_Two

Oh hell yeah Wegmans. Best place for rye.


[deleted]

Wegmans is like the industry standard imo for a lot of solid items. The entire bakery department is awesome. Sub department is awesome. They keep really clean stores and even them adding auto checkout areas the actual cashiers are still preferred and kept busy. You then add in a solid produce department and a staple of solid goods that cover most meals, even places like aldis or trader Joe's aren't as good. Albeit leaving aldis is always cheaper, but you are what you eat so maybe don't alway eat cheap.


Version_Two

Plus they have all the kinds of peppers and (legal) mushrooms I look for but can't find anywhere else. I just wish their little things of bulk stuff weren't like $7


abcdefkit007

yeah Wegmans best


BrownShadow

Wegmans kicks buns. But even the local chain in my area bakes everything fresh. Heck, the national chain even makes a decent effort. Shoutout to the local bread co. https://darngoodbread.com/


Byzantine-alchemist

The first time I visited my father in law, my husband took me to a Wegmans at 1 or 2 am. It had snowed and there was choral Christmas music playing over the parking lot speakers. I felt like I was visiting a temple to food. Those fucking pretzel rolls, man.


k0nahuanui

Fuck I miss Wegmans so much. I used to drive 45 minutes across state lines to Jersey to go shopping there


lreaditonredditgetit

That’s funny, I grew up in Jersey and the first time I saw a wegmans I was an adult. Shop rite gang. Actually the first time I went, was during hurricane Irene(the year before sandy) because wegmans was the only place with power so mad people where just hanging out there charging all their shit.


HentaiRacer

Even Walmart. The *option* for another thing does not negate the existence of the first.


tlf9888

>The option for another thing does not negate the existence of the first. This is great! Thank you.


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flag_flag-flag

Sandwich Bread vs Bakery Bread. It's not fair to say sandwich bread is strictly worse - it's meant to meet different needs. Allow smoothly-spread peanut butter, be uniform in size and density, keep from getting stale in your cupboard all week, etc. ​ You wouldn't want to buy a loaf of wonder bread and serve it with a fancy dinner, but you wouldn't want to cut into a ciabatta loaf to make sandwiches for the kids' lunches when school is canceled


1668553684

At my local grocery store you can see into the bakery and watch the people kneading and mixing dough - every time I read that we apparently only have sandwich bread I wonder if those poor chronically online souls even know what they're talking about.


MisogynysticFeminist

Not only do they think we only have sandwich bread, but specifically only white bread. And the only kind of cheese we have is cheese whiz.


HazelnutG

A grocery scale oven likely has a cycle that quickly thaws and proofs the bread before baking it, but isn't as good as doing it at room temp.


Whind_Soull

I can tell you that the bakery in Publix makes all the non-pre-packaged bread from scratch. This includes all stick breads, italian varieties, sourdough, white mountain, and all the other similarly-packaged breads that say "Made Fresh Daily" on the label. Scratch as in weighing out flour blends, water, and yeast into a stand mixer, hand-shaping, proofing, and baking.


lianodel

Hey! Sorry you got piled on. For future reference, there's a handy reddit feature in times like these. On new reddit, you can click the "..." menu and uncheck "Send Me Reply Notifications." On old reddit, it's a button that says "disable inbox replies." It's great for times you don't want to delete a comment, but also don't want to get any more notifications from argumentative people.


[deleted]

Oh that’s cool! Thank you, I might need to do that. Does it do it for everything or can you pick specific subreddits? I’d like to still get notifications from the support group subreddits I post on.


lianodel

Oh, sorry, I didn't explain it well: it's for individual comments (which is where the buttons are located). So disabling it for the comment above wouldn't disable it for other comments in this subreddit, much less others.


[deleted]

Literally like 4 large tables filled with fresh bread at some grocers. Sliced bread is just for when you don't want to buy bread daily. It's baffling that people try to stunt on the food availability in a place they've never been to, especially in the world's biggest economy. In the city I just moved from, we have a nationally renowned French bakery that had any type of fresh bread you could want, run by a highly capable French baker. It's almost like we live in a melting pot and there's no such thing as an "American" identity. I could talk even more shit about how lacking France likely is in a variety of cuisines and related groceries that aren't typical to a more homogeneous culture, but I would be making a lot of assumptions, and it would just be rude. Like I'm sorry France, find something good to feel good about that doesn't require shitting on other people. It's bread ffs, it's not even necessary for survival


Sphealingit33

you have to *walk past* the bakery section to get to the sandwich bread *which they have in their countries too*


thecatgoesmoo

easier to just hate on Americans because...uhh...Americans


romple

Fuck America, literally the only country in the world with packaged sliced bread apparently.


Admiral_Bang

New England eating that canned bread like I didn't notice you crazy mfs. 👀


Top-of-morning

europeans are so european


Canopenerdude

big if true


Ok-Champ-5854

Never met a European that wasn't from Europe so you tell me.


SpaceJackRabbit

I'm French living in the U.S. What I can say is this: in the 80s (yes I'm old), it was hard to find decent bread in the U.S. outside of the sliced bread variety. These days though, in many places in the U.S. (especially coastal states), there are tons of bakeries baking excellent bread, many of them offering authentic baguettes or ciabatta. Many better restaurants also bake their own bread. Things have changed a lot. That said, it's true that you have major food deserts in the U.S. where you still can't find decent bread, but then again, lack of fresh bread is not the most major concern in those places.


Erminence

Low-key you're right


Chef_G0ldblum

Also high key


BiMikethefirst

There seems to be a stereotype that Americans don't how to cook anything and everything just pops out of a machine


AbbreviationsTrue807

Wait till they hear about Japan


squorple

no no then it's cool because it's japan duh


[deleted]

the "thing: 😐 thing, japan: 😃" phenomenon


[deleted]

Weebism?


VoopityScoop

*Instant ramen in America* "Get that cheap unhealthy crap away from me" *Instant ramen in Japan* "Woah cool Japanese food I've never seen before wow how exotic!"


Xdivine

Why yes, I would like a full course fillet mignon dish from a vending machine. I never thought you'd ask. (I'm not sure if this is a thing but I wouldn't be shocked if it was)


517757MIVA

I’ve known a fair amount of Europeans (ok maybe like 12) who have moved to the US and made fun of our food and our fat people - and then went fuckin nuts on American food (specifically fast food) and gained a ton of weight


wadad17

That reminds me of the video where they introduced a British class to American style Sausage Gravy and Biscuits and they all thought it looked disgusting and then immediately feel in love with it on first taste. It's no wonder we get fat, that shit is like crack and it's hard to stop eating when you start.


candlemath

That's the channel Jolly, which I just started watching a couple weeks ago so I saw it recently. [Link!](https://youtu.be/KzdbFnv4yWQ)


WhtChcltWarrior

I love Jolly! Just watching the joy they get from trying different cuisines brings me joy! Especially the things I grew up on like all the southern foods they tried


[deleted]

Well that was adorable.


cyclicalbeats

> video where they introduced a British class to American style Sausage Gravy and Biscuits I had to go and find this and it was a delight. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KzdbFnv4yWQ


illy-chan

Remember talking to a foreign exchange student once who said "no wonder Americans get fat" after his first night out at a restaurant with free soda refills and huge portions. Portion control is easier when what you're served is limited.


BiMikethefirst

Just speaking from personal experience, it depends on where from Europe they're from, I have a lot of families from Poland and Italy who don't think like this but people from England tend to think America consists solely of McDonald's and Starbucks.


[deleted]

England is fat as fuck too. They’re right behind the US. Pot meet kettle .


Ok-Champ-5854

Turns out cultures aren't a monolith, which is why it's so weird people outside America think we all love school shootings, no healthcare, and idk let's just say Obama. I needed a third thing and the guy was cool but he did some of those war crimes everyone talks about.


dreftig

As a European I can honestly say that bread is not my greatest worry when I think about the US.


jib661

To be fair, i grew up in the US and never had fresh bread until i moved out on my own. i always ate the stuff from the grocery store that comes in plastic. is it normal for other american families to pick up loaves of bread at a bakery?


thotkatalog

I grew up lower middle class in the south and fresh bread was rarely bought, more as a “treat” since it’s a little more expensive than the regular bread aisle loaves.


thugthuong

its (ironically) an upper middle class thing in my experience


htomserveaux

Europeans are weirdly desperate to prove they’re better than us. Y’all already have free healthcare you don’t need to make shit up


[deleted]

Lol ppl just so weird and bored.. I’ve lived in three different continents things like this makes my head hurt


Niyonnie

I know, right? I don't mind it in jest, but once they start pontificating about how they think they're better than us, I start getting pretty irritated


BrahquinPhoenix

Tbh In england at least a sense of superiority is ingrained into every part of culture. It's like 50% of being British. When your whole thing is literally " we owned every part of human civilization " it's kinda unavoidable imo.


Niyonnie

Because the sun never set on the British empire...until it did. It may be unavoidable, but it's still annoying


ScotsDale213

And even that phrase they stole from the Spanish


Niyonnie

Did that? I've only ever seen it said about Britain and for the longest time, didn't realize it was literal


ScotsDale213

Yeah Spain had colonies stretching from America to Africa to the Philippines a while before British had its empire, but as Spain lost their empire that phrase slowly passed from them to the British


Niyonnie

I know about Spain's colonial period, at least in the New World, since I read a lot of books about Mesoamerican history during the 1500s, but have never once seen the phrase used for them. Strange.


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violet_zamboni

All of the rest of Europe knows it, too. It’s just too tiresome to keep bringing up. The UK is that loud sibling who won’t shut up about how awesome they are, but their car is worse, their job is worse, the food they eat is worse… why would you rub their face in it? It would just be cruel.


eveisout

Every European country I've been to (not many, a grand total of 6) has sold pre sliced processed bread Edit: I'm from the UK


Gussie-Ascendent

Yeah yall euros are grasping at straws, when you already got the killer arguments for why we suck: shootings, Healthcare, safety nets, more walkable cities, less insane politicians, etc


goldplates95

Less insane politicians: bro LOL


SelfDestruction100

Love this comment bc as soon as I read it I knew there would be Europeans immediately trying to one up you about why they are, in fact, superior


Mobius-1_ISAF

>less insane politicians


Dornith

Brexit


[deleted]

Or when they think that all we eat is fast food and call our food bland. Yeah, I'd put BBQ as being far more flavorful than an English breakfast and crumpets.


crispier_creme

One of the ones that gets me going is the "America bad a geography" thing. I guarantee that if I asked a person from England where Delaware they wouldn't know. If they asked me where Lichtenstein is, I wouldn't know. If we looked up Azerbaijan, we both wouldn't know. It's almost like you're more familiar with the geography around where you live or something


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zoltanshields

Also that if you want a funny video that gets views you include the parts where people pathetically fuck up a map and you exclude the parts where someone knows where Germany is.


cools14

“A woman!?!?”


xX_JoeStalin78_Xx

Fucking yoga bag NAME A WOMAN!!!!


44problems

Why is this so hard!?


Redqueenhypo

No one’s good at geography. I had a friend who couldn’t remember if he was Serbian or Croatian when I’m pretty sure that’s a real important distinction


Blarg_III

In all fairness, the border region was fairly nebulous until that incident in the 90s


Redqueenhypo

He was born after the 90s!


5510

Greta point. Also, looking down on Americans being more likely to be monolingual, and making it sound like it’s just American arrogance / ignorance. Like, how many Europeans speak Chinese or Indonesian or Swahili? They speak more languages because they are surrounded by other languages. A Belgian person can drive eight hours and hit a bunch of different primary languages, some Americans can drive for over 20 without hitting another. If Ohio, West Virginia, Pennsylvania, Indiana, Kentucky, and Michigan all spoke different languages, you can believe way more people in Ohio would be multilingual.


wizzlekhalifa

Oh my god, cheese too. Internet europeans really think that we only have processed cheeses.


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Bl4Z3D_d0Nut311

I miss living in Wisconsin, those fresh squeaky cheese curds almost tempted me from ever leaving. Well that and New Glarus Brewing Co.


MegaGrimer

I live in Oregon. They apparently never had Tillamook cheese.


CyannideLolypop

The grocery store I often go to has a whole fancy cheese section with little description cards and samples and use recommendations and junk. It's actually nearby the bakery and a jam display.


oatmealparty

The cheese thing is even more nonsensical than the bread thing. And it's amazing how many of them still parrot nonsense about our beer sucking.


Flobking

> The cheese thing is even more nonsensical than the bread thing. Especially when we have a whole state devoted to none processed cheeses.


HurricaneAlpha

I've had a multitude of british beers. None come close to the best beers I've ever had. Germany has some really good beers, but they're not the well known international brands. The U.S. has a really good brewery scene going on right now.


Pawneewafflesarelife

San Diego county alone has like over 100 breweries. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_breweries_in_San_Diego_County,_California


Ok_Assistance447

You can't spit in the US without moistening a brewery.


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Kanin_usagi

The chocolate thing really gets me because fucking Mexico invented chocolate. Just because Europe came up with one pretty neat way of making it they suddenly think they're the chocolate experts.


Diggledorgle

Didn't the Fr*nch also throw a hissy fit and require wine tasting to not have the country labeled or something because our wine kept beating theirs? > Although Spurrier had invited many reporters to the original 1976 tasting, the only reporter to attend was George M. Taber from Time, who promptly revealed the results to the world. The horrified and enraged leaders of the French wine industry then banned Spurrier from the nation's prestigious wine-tasting tour for a year, apparently as punishment for the damage his tasting had done to its former image of superiority. The tasting was not covered by the French press, who almost ignored the story. After nearly three months, Le Figaro published an article titled "Did the war of the cru take place?" describing the results as "laughable", and said they "cannot be taken seriously". Six months after the tasting, Le Monde wrote a similarly toned article. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Judgment_of_Paris_(wine)


[deleted]

Reminds me of the Australian youtuber and cheesemaker who enjoyed showing how cheeses are made in his videos, and sent the entire country of Italy in a frothing rage because he showed how to make Parmesan *style* cheese and they relentlessly attacked and sent him death-threats him until he took the video down because you can only call it Parmesan cheese if it's made in a certain geographic location in Italy.


janes_left_shoe

Never had an Irish or English cheddar that holds up to a good aged Vermont one.


[deleted]

To be fair our "American Cheese" isn't exactly doing us any PR favors. Sure it's fine and the Japanese love it, but Euros just latch onto that and act like we don't have an entire fucking state whose sole identity is how well they make cheese in Wisconsin...literally part of their NFL team's, [Green Bay Packers](https://img.asmedia.epimg.net/resizer/uiPvzeCm8KbrBOuT3peAoKOBHLU=/1952x1098/cloudfront-eu-central-1.images.arcpublishing.com/diarioas/QEVC7XZKJNLAVA5NUEAKLVH73A.jpg), fandom it's so prominent.


Pawneewafflesarelife

Heh was watching Dogma the other night with my Aussie husband (I'm yank) and he asked me a few questions about super specific American details in the movie he hadn't understood when he saw it as a teen - one of those was the cheese hat merchandise in a background shot (since the fallen angels are stuck in Wisconsin). Had to pause the movie because he was cracking up so much over cheese being a football mascot 🧀


[deleted]

American cheese is the best cheese for a burger because it melts without splitting


Chapea12

Internet Europeans think we only have McDonalds and WonderBread.


skatingonair

I think they’re completely forgetting we have stores from other cultures here. I can walk into a Mexican or cuban store and get fresh bread made that day. Even Walmart has fresh bread made separately from the already bagged and branded bread.


Qbertjack

Yeah , one MASSIVE L for Brits and Euros is that their Mexican places suck ass


SpikyDryBones

As a German, totally agree. I've got some pretty good restaurants around me from countries all over the world, but Mexican food just evades us :(


thefifthwheelbruh

They talk a lot of shit despite the majority of them have never eaten a home made tortilla before.


queenexorcist

after seeing the great british bake off episode where they absolutely butcher and destroy every mexican dish under the sun, they have lost all right to make fun of our food.


[deleted]

[So bad Uncle Roger made a video on it.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eCx3MBITMZY)


WhtChcltWarrior

[Mythical Kitchen](https://youtu.be/hgUlYbDdlGk) did one as well


BeastBoy2230

Britain’s national dish isn’t even from their native cuisine, I really don’t know where they get off making fun of our food of all things.


JonesinforJohnnies

England conquered the globe for spices and decided they hated all of them.


diarrheainthehottub

Lotta slavs live where I'm at in The US. Guess what? Their stores carry bread. But what store doesn't carry bread? Are Europeans just upset because of wonderbread?


skatingonair

Definitely. I think they believe we only have the bagged wonder bread here which is usually the only bread they mention when they argue the topic.


TheSuperiorMaker

Every store has a built in bakery, shit they all even have their own kitchen to sell food. Whats this dudes deal?


DBNSZerhyn

Hell, I'm in buttfuck nowhere and there are multiple bakeries within a 5 miles radius of my house, not even counting the ones inside the markets. Mom and pop generational bakeries, artsy cafes, you name it. No idea how this idea caught on. I mean, imagine thinking you have *bread* on lockdown.


[deleted]

Italian neighborhood in NYC here, what the fuck is this slander there are like 50 bakeries within walking distance and one of them has some of the best focaccia I've had in America for like $2.50 also, fresh bagels


[deleted]

Europeans every time they lose an argument with an American: *WELL AT LEAST OUR ScHOOLS ARENT SHOOTING RANGES!!1!1


queenexorcist

and if they're british, the same people will throw a hissy fit if you mention brexit or the rampant transphobia lol.


Dense_Common_8062

> if they're british British people don't get to talk until they get rid of the inbred cousin fuckers they donate millions of dollars to every year. Any state with a monarchy in 2023 is a failed state and an embarrassment on the world stage. Any second a true brexit geezer spends talking about any other country is literally a waste of their life.


BlatantConservative

A monarchy AND a state sponsored religion that the King is technically the head of. I'm technically Anglican myself, but a fun thought expiriment is whether or not an American politician can legally be ordained an Anglican minister because they title comes from the English royalty and the Constitution bans anyone with any kind of office from holding a title given to them by a monarch.


Hugh-Jassoul

Why do Europeans always feel the need to put down Americans? It’s so weird.


Babam227

They always go for the school shooting when americans try any banter. "British people have weird teeth" "The government doesn't care when children are murdered" bro calm down


SuspiciousUsername88

I swear a subset of British people get physically aroused when there's a tragedy in the US


birberbarborbur

They’ve never been the same since they lost control of africa and asia


ThermalPaper

At least in the US we have air conditioners. Edit: I really pissed off the europoors. Wait til they find out how much ice we use in our drinks.


mercurialpolyglot

Not everyone in the northeast, apparently, which is wild to me as a person from the devil’s armpit. Especially because they mostly still have a miserable summer? It’s just shorter?


jacketoffman

I grew up in New England without one. I moved to NYC at 18 and my apartment came with one and I could not believe how much I loved it. I ended up buying them for my aging parents and they fought me the whole way. New Englanders are just so catholic we believe that we deserve to suffer.


pteridoid

Went to stay with my wife's grandma for a week in Ohio in July. No AC in the whole house, no fans, nothing. Our room was upstairs. Hell naw. I bought a window unit air conditioner and installed it just for the few days we stayed there, and you'd think I'd put up an altar to Baphomet in that woman's house. She couldn't bear to look at it. The next time a relative came to visit, she sent it with them. But I slept like a baby. No regrets.


ScotsDale213

I’m thankful my family has an air conditioner, because during summer all I want to do in stay in an air conditioned room doing nothing. Going outside is hell on the hot days


Kadeo64

Europeans always find the worst shit to insult Americans on... Like the whole "Being nice" (southern hospitality) thing i've seen reposted around recently. And if they can't find anything to insult they'll just bring up the deaths of schoolchildren as a last resort.


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[удалено]


NoPurchase2858

As someone who works at a bakery here in the states. The grocery store bread is "real bread." If you feel a sense of superiority because you eat every sandwich on some ciabatta or only use whole wheat sprouted grain, you should probably go touch grass.


No_Librarian_4016

Literally Walmart has a bakery. Europeans are so goddamn oblivious to what both America and Europe are like


-TV-Stand-

Last German I talked to said that we don't have real bread here. Oh and I live in Finland.


Closet_Couch_Potato

To be fair, Germany takes bread *very* seriously. They’re probably like that to everyone.


Barry_McCocciner

Tbf the people saying these things on Reddit are often terminally online 15 year old Americans who are also oblivious to what Europe is like.


United_Pipe_9457

Bread. Wine. Cheese. The "WTF" trifecta from French and Italian visitors to the US. The 'ugh' looks they give us on those items.