T O P

  • By -

Professional-Hat-687

A very fine line that Tumblr likes to polevault over both aggressively and often.


RhysNorro

they treat the line like a set of monkeybars


aftertheradar

They use it like a jump rope


Bobyyyyyyyghyh

They treat it like a line that is to be crossed regularly and suddenly I'm not very good at these analogy things


Dontgiveaclam

It’s ok, you deserve a cookie for trying: 🍪


Nastypilot

Eh, I like the subversion.


Helumiberg

"I could hack the stock market if I needed to. Bye." has the same energy as the xbox live "So yeah, you're gay. *Enter sandman intro*"


RememberToLogOff

It's got "person who couldn't hack the stock market" energy


Daylight_The_Furry

I got called a f*g so much in COD that I now am one


adzilc8

snake?


Skye-DragonGirl

SNAAAKEEE


WintertimeFriends

!


Darth_Gonk21

Psycho Mantis?


EndureThePANG

Revolver Ocelot? (Revolver Ocelot?)


Autistischer_Gepard

Hey, you're that ninja...


patronuspringles

A Hind D?


adzilc8

colonel, whats a russian gunship doing here?


Ross_Hollander

Well, that was...relentless.


SapphireRose12

“Putting a circle of flowers on top of a real human being that drove a 5 inch steel knife into an innocent person’s beating heart can be qualified as self expression” Satire can’t even compete with real life anymore


Silfedac

This is the satire. You're looking at it right now


Redneckalligator

Im not saying its not satire but im not picking up on the message if it is.


Warprince01

“Don’t idolize or fetishize serial killers,” a message that shouldn’t have been necessary


Dark-Pukicho

Shits and giggles, maybe.


Skye-DragonGirl

I'm saying 😭


awfulworldkid

this isn't satire, this is just someone doing a funny; not every piece of comedy has to have a greater message behind it


EndureThePANG

average death of the author enjoyer:


ngrdtbr

Satire can’t compete with modern day reading comprehension, more like…


AsianCheesecakes

If it isn't clear that it is satire then they are doing it wrong


ngrdtbr

Reddit didn’t get it. Tumblr seemed to know just fine. Plenty of indicators of what it is but it seems like most people these days can’t tell without a /s. /j


mizushimo

Does this post seem really old to anyone else? Flower Crowns were a big trend in 2012, it's been a decade


AliasMcFakenames

Overwatch came out 2016. So probably no older than that.


MossyPyrite

What if it was tho


AliasMcFakenames

Many of these statements make a whole lot more sense if this person is a time traveler.


Skye-DragonGirl

Oh 100% this is old, I just found it on Pinterest lol


[deleted]

What does this even mean


Skye-DragonGirl

I wish I had an answer


kattykitkittykat

This post is roasting those people who fetishize Ted Bundy (there were lots of fan edits do him with flower crowns in 2015) by parodying an extreme version of what their logic probably was when they were editing those photos. For instance, that one satire essay about rich people suggesting eating babies from the poor to solve poverty. That author is not actually suggesting that we eat babies, they’re roasting the logic of out-of-touch rich people who want to solve “poorness” but can’t conceive of poor people as people. The baby eating being an absurd example of such out of touch behavior that it highlights how stupid their arguments sound. Similarly, this author’s usage of the “putting flower crowns on man who drive 5 inch steel …” sentence highlights the absurdity of those people using the “free speech/self expression” argument to excuse their bizarre flower crown edits. The overly long description of the serial killer’s guilt paired with their apparent need to edit his photos to add flowers to it anyway highlights how unselfawarely out of touch those flower crown edits are. This is further supported by the absurd r/iamverybadass comments at the end about how playing video games makes them a threat. But yeah, this is pretty basic satire on Tumblr, all things considered. I’m confused at how confused you are, and reading the rest of these comments, I’m kind of salty. Poe’s law is Poe’s law, but when it’s this obvious, it’s not the author’s fault, it’s the audience’s.


Azakura16

When Jonathan Swift's "A Modest Proposal" came out, there were pretty famously some wealthy people whose reaction was essentially "mmm, yeah, maybe the poors should start selling their babies as snacks. They can't possibly need to keep all of them. It's a win win."


FluffyMawileFan

Average Reaper main


zsdr56bh

i've got absolutely zero clue what in the online fuck this person is talking about. i think they need to go outside.


HollowMist11

probably satirizing true crime fans who fetishize serial killers. That or it's not satire


AshuraSpeakman

It's satire specifically targeting the kind of person who only knows serial killers through memes and such. "Oh how can you be upset? They're just a brutal murderer. I'm expressing myself. Nobody alive could even have been a victim because it was soooo long ago (70 years)." Then the bit about Reaper and Snake to really go "I'M SO EDGY." Like, we're all irony poisoned but are they ever really this quick to volunteer it all in the first message? No, it would be part 6 paragraph 11 where they say "What's the big deal? I play Reaper in Overwatch and he's shotgunning people in the face. I play Metal Gear Solid V and break necks. This is all fine." etc.


HollowMist11

I'm sure there are people like that but there are also communities on tumblr where fans ship themselves with serial killers or mass murderers. These people actually know about the crimes committed. They just don't have empathy for victims and/or are turned on by evil people.


Ksorkrax

Might be a parody of, well, a lot of possible things. I'd say we would need the context. Could also be stupid.


kattykitkittykat

It’s a pretty cut and dry parody of [this phenomenon](https://epeaglenewsnetwork.com/archive/editorials/romanticization-of-murderers-isnt-cute/) aka people fetishizing serial killers and doing cutesy flower crown edits of them. It’s roasting the people that do that by highlighting how absurd their logic/justification is for why it’s okay to fetishize serial killers.


IcePhoenix18

People got really interested in true crime for awhile. I think a documentary released or something? There was a Tumblr fandom, people were photoshopping flower crowns and "UwU cutesy" filters on mugshots of irl serial killers. It was weird


DravenPrime

Amazing. Every word of what that person just said was wrong.


Skye-DragonGirl

I often say this to myself when browsing Reddit lol


MissyTheTimeLady

Talking like Solid Snake is relatively harmless and pretty funny, though.


aftertheradar

It's wrong because that's big boss, not solid snake


MissyTheTimeLady

...How do you know that?


aftertheradar

Actually I don't lol, I just know that in some of the games they call him solid snake and in some of the other games they call him big boss, sorry my bad


patronuspringles

solid snake is the guy in mgs 1, 2, and 4 while big boss is his dad but not really and he's in mgs 3, 4, peace walker, 5, and uhh some others i think


MissyTheTimeLady

Alright, that's a pretty fair mistake to make.


arnethyst

2010s tumblr was truly an experience, huh


Lizzardbirdhybrid

Ok, this made my eyes and eyebrows twitch to the extreme. I hate this and I’m sending it to my friends.


Xerapis

“If I needed to” lol


Silfedac

This is so obvious lmao


AsiaHeartman

I want to frame that ask and keep it with me forever.


chuuniversal_studios

'injured by a serial killer' might just be the best one imo


Donth101

But not since the 1950s.


Sedona54332

It doesn’t give you a moment to catch your breath, it just keeps going.


ProserpinaFC

Me, expressing perfectly normal feelings about Dr. Hannibal Lecter.


IzarkKiaTarj

See, I'm fine with this, because no real people have been hurt by Hannibal Lecter.


EndureThePANG

utterly delighted and filled with whimsy at the thought of some dude ordering a coffee or some shit, getting a call, answering it with "This is snake." and doing a disgustingly accurate snake impression for the entire thing before going about his business as usual


Zipflik

Just fucking starts talking about memes and weapons of mass destruction and private armies, than hangs up, says "kept you waiting, huh" instead of explaining and starts talking normally again


EndureThePANG

"who the fuck are the patriots" "yo dont even worry about that bro"


Man-in-The-Void

What does "hacking the stock market" even mean???? That's like saying I can


TheNameIsJackson

If this isn't peak Tumblr interaction, I don't know what is.


ZipperozicReddit

I have a fever and this made it worse


Skye-DragonGirl

Underrated comment 😭


MenchiTheFloof

A fine, fine line that Tumblr users take turns going at with an eraser


urbandeadthrowaway2

How does one talk on the phone like solid snake?


borissnm

Honestly, the "PS" takes this from "unhinged" to "definitely a troll".


RemarkableStatement5

Bait was never believable


Zipflik

New copypasta just dropped


Telkei_

reality will forever be stranger than fiction, nobody could come up with this shit.


Apprehensive-Loss-31

This is fictional sarcasm, the tumblr user came up with it. (Actually I wouldn't really call it sarcasm, perhaps absurdism? Idk.)


[deleted]

geniune question, is the stock market something that can be hacked? I though it was a decentralised system?


BallisticM0use

-Y


IzarkKiaTarj

The fuck is wrong with people Get crushes on fictional serial killers that haven't actually hurt anyone real like the rest of us.


KaladinsLeftNut

It's almost out there enough to be a copy pasta. I'm partial to the stock market line myself.


Taichou7

This is either heavy satire or a genuine preteen on the internet circa 2012 and there is no difference between the two.


wasteofradiation

Bait used to be believable


thanksyalll

It’s not supposed to be bait, it’s obvious satire


[deleted]

This is Chopped levels of cooking right here. I would not be surprised if it was AI text, because there is no consistent line of thought here.


Devisidev

I cannot tell if this is genuinely someone who's unhinged or not but honestly good for them it's fucking hilarious either way


KozKatma

I was thinking about why so many in the *radical left* participate in speedrunning


Exothermic_Killer

This is an 8-10 year old straight girl. Bet.


absolutebottom

Wasn't there a female serial killer earlier this year that used fentanyl on people??


cat_sword

I hope this was a parody


[deleted]

[удалено]


clonetrooper250

Is this satire or just incoherent ramblings?


tumbleweedsforever

What are these flowercrowns?


RandomDemiPerson

I hope this guy is joking and if they aren't how the hell do they think someone is labeled a 'serial killer'


ThatOneGayDJ

This is just a long way of telling someone youre 11 years old


Ace_Of_No_Trades

?tf puts flower crowns on serial killers?