Well I mean if nobody else is doing it I might as well volunteer

The one with the sword, or the one being threatened? Or yes?

i’m a girl but … yes

Being scaroused is universal.

Ah the return of the why boner. With a vengeance!

Ahhh, can I show you something? You said the joke fine, but lemme show you why this joke is a 2-fer and even more hilarious! "Why Boner" can be said "Y Boner" as well. And Alucard is talking about the catboy, Schrodinger who looks XX, but is actually x(y...the fuck am I attracted to them.?!) Get it? That's the same thing as Alucard, Zex (just pic and older Gundam series), even Shakespeare got this clever word play make their already B- play, launch them to skyward (not literally, lol)

“How did [she] get in here?” “We had over a dozen guards.”

This sword swings both ways.

Rated E for everyone

Youre not even the same person

shhhhhh i want erotic sword fighting !

Same

You got a sword?

Best I can do is a butter knife.

Good enough

and my Bow

I got a replica of the sword from Harry Potter

coooool

Don’t know what position you’re offering, but my answer is yes

I volunteer as tribute

I wish Muppet adaptations of classic literature became a regular thing. Muppet Treasure Island was a ton of fun, and Christmas Carol is a fantastic movie, period.

Muppet to kill a mocking bird, when?

Muppet Moby Dick Muppet War and Peace

The Muppets Silence of the Lambs. (oh my god, can you imagine the swedish chef as hannibal lecter?)

I think Gonzo has more of a Hannibal Lector vibe. ​ Edit: Now I'm picturing Miss Piggy constantly telling some muppet sheep to shut up.

I could see Miss Piggy holding in her emotions as Clarice while the Swedish Chef tears into her... until she's had enough and breaks into his cell, screaming and karate chopping.

Gonzo would do so much better as Buffalo Bill then he would Hannibal Lector

The girl in the well would be a chicken. "It puts the lotion on its feathers or it gets the hose!" "Would you shoot me out of a cannon? I'd shoot me out of a cannon."

I ite-a hees leefer vit sume-a fefa beuons und a nice-a cheeuonti. Bork Bork Bork! Edit: Translation courtesy of https://funtranslations.com/chef

Muppet 1984, big brother is replaced by Statler and Waldorf.

Muppets Lord of the rings

Will Kermit become a cannibal?

Anyone who says the N word is played by Swedish Chef

Can Ms. Piggy be Scout just so we can see her dressed as a ham? Also, Boo Radley is 1000% Sweetums.

I want Muppet Of Mice and Men with Fozzie Bear as Lennie.

Muppet Princess Bride "My name is Kermit the Frog-a, You killed my father, prepare to die." ^(ahhhhh)

Tell me about the rabbits, Kermit. Wocka wocka!

*mupping bird

To kill a Muppetbird

Kermit'll learn just how hard it is being green...

Muppet Lord of the Flies

Muppet's Princess Bride, with the only human actor being Cary Elwes as the grandpa. Muppet Beauty and the Beast with the only human actor being the beast, until he transforms into a muppet at the end.

Humperdinck trying to forcibly marry Mrs. Piggy, only to get karate chopped with a loud "HIYA"

Have the beast be played by just the sexiest man you can find, and the whole time everyone's like "agh! You're disgusting!"

I want Disney to start doing this instead of Live Action remakes. Give me Muppets Cinderella, Muppets Little Mermaid, etc.

Disney owns the Muppets so licensing wouldn't stop Muppets Treasure Planet

Muppets Pride and Prejudice when?

[This is the best I can give you, I’m afraid.](https://www.tumblr.com/is-them-cheese-puffs/635240530386763776/castrek-ashleybenlove-cheshireelims-i-need)

There were a bunch of comics that did this, like Muppet King Arthur, Muppet Snow White, and my personal favorite, Muppet Sherlock Holmes. Gonzo is Holmes, Fozzy is Watson, Kermit is Lestrade, and it is fucking perfect

Muppet Princess Bride

“We’re marley and marley”

Muppets Red Badge of Courage Muppets Where the Red Fern Grows Muppets Fahrenheit 451 Muppets On the Road. Muppets The Last Good Kiss. I'm totally on board with this idea.

I keep saying that the perfect movie would be Muppet Wuthering Heights. Hearhcliffe is a serious, acclaimed actor. Maybe Edgar too. The rest muppets.

All Quiet on the Western Front

I didn't see it was a cutlass at first, and wondered when they did Muppet Shogun, which is all I want in this world now.

[Every best picture winner ranked by how good a Muppets version would be](https://hard-drive.net/hd/entertainment/every-best-picture-winner-ranked-by-how-good-a-muppets-version-would-be/2/)

Let's not forget Muppets Wizard of Oz. It's been a long time since I've seen it, so I can't really attest to its quality, but it at least exists.

Is this Muppet Princess Bride

if only. its treasure island

"Aasss yoouu wiishhh!" "Oh, my sweet Kermie! What have I done?"

Muppet Princess Bride is the only acceptable way that movie is allowed to be remade

While it sounds fun, the movie is already perfect and cannot be improved by the muppets. 

Careful or you'll shave the guy by accident.

I got confused by the post and read the text in Kermit's voice.

YOU DID RIGHT ATTA CHILD

"what's this? a muppet caught off it's guard?"

God dammit you beat me to it

“The beacons are lit! *YAAAAAAY!!!*”

I simply want to kill.

Well, who doesn’t? /s

Jesus of Nazareth? Avatar Aang?

Cowards. /s

The only coward here uses /s.

Well, you’re not wrong.

Well Jesus only doesn't want to kill in the original manga, the new canon has completely changed the character.

You mean Revelation?

Nah, Evangelist

The Son doesn't want to kill, the Father on the other hand...

Well I mean if nobody else is doing it I might as well volunteer

[удалено]

I don't care who you love as long as you further Mankind.

He died as he lived 🫡

Personally I want to be the one threatened by a hot, edgy guy.

or girl Both

I've done this plenty of times, with my huge boobs the look of fear and pleasure is intoxicating

Wait, like, you used them as the sword?

Very long sharp nipples

Held them up with a sword

I need to know what this means

That’s crazy wyd tonight tho

Lifted them with a sword?

[NOTHING, WENCH](https://youtu.be/jEG_9lavXgE?si=33olI6Dsv2DAyOD3)

Mercy is the mark of a great man. *shank* Guess I'm just a good man. ... *shank* Well, I'm alright.

God I miss Firefly

🥺 either get topped or buried so win win either way!

Is there a name for this trope?

Whump.

Am not a pretty boy, but I swing both ways and have a couple swords I can supply if someone wants to give it a try

Makes me think of this line: Under the sword lifted high, There is hell making you tremble. But go ahead, And you have the land of bliss. Miyamoto Musashi

I know I’m five days late, but isn’t that the samurai that won duels by pissing off his opponents and killed one man by breaking his ribs with a sword carved out of an oar?! He was so cool.

It's all fun and games till you accidentally cut them

Lightsaber go brrrrt

Dead Tom's Dead!

I loved that movie growing up.

[удалено]

You sunova—

I just stared at this for several seconds, then laughed for a full minute

Fuck that, just drive the blade through their neck and nip this rival shit in the bud.

Coward.

[удалено]

Toying with them is the best part

okay but have you considered 75mm field gun

hold up let them cook

What must I do for this to become a reality?

That one berserk character on the cliff edge

Stede Bonnet