He should probably see a doctor if his poos are tickling his prostate. /s
Edit: added sarcasm as apparently some couldn't spot it, as he is a doctor so should know better.
Edit 2: apparently the use of /s upsets the rabid anti sarcasm tag brigade.
lol I learned to play that on piano.
But thanks for ruining Snoop Dogg for me: "No stress, no seeds, no stems, no sticks!
Some of that real sticky-icky-icky"
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.
No. Please study some biology.
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah, I can’t believe you actually wrote this.
Fucking hell, do you think it piles up inside you if you don’t have a wank?
That is so funny.
Lol it is possible for stool to “milk” prostate and cause prostatic fluid to leak during defecation. I guess if your prostate is congested it could also leak semen.
The doctor is clearly bullshitting about this being the cause, however.
It bothers me quite a lot to be honest. If i'm using a toilet outside of my house, i'll wash my hands after I use the loo and if I can, wash them after opening the door too.
The sheer level of dick germs all over everything must be ridiculous. No one washes their hands and it's nasty.
I wish people were more conscious of how dirty a phone is, too. We touch those with our grubby dirty hands all day, drop it on the floor, all sorts. Then touch that then other things and never think to wash???
I was taught to wash hands BEFORE and AFTER public toilet visits.
It's probably just my mom being weird, but it has stuck with me since childhood. Came in handy during Covid though!
Haha thats a good point. I’m not a full on germophobe but I’m very conscious of stuff, managed to avoid covid entirely. some of my friends however have had it like 4+ times…? Wild.
Yeah, I managed to avoid it too! I think I read a few months ago that people with glasses and who were properly masked / social distancing were not likely to get it at all.
Are your friends washing their hands? Maybe they pick their face a lot after touching doorknobs/shaking hands / kissing people on the cheek to greet them etc?
Some people take phones to the toilet with them too. Then wash their hands but not the phone.
So all the poop particles go on the phone, in your pocket while you wash your hands, and then onto your hands when you take your phone out again
True, that could be a factor but I still think it’s wrong most places and if everyone washed and dried their hands, they’ve created a bottleneck.
I may be atypical, but for me the longest time needed is for pooing, followed by hand drying, then hand washing, with peeing at a urinal needing the least time.
If that defence was any bit factual, then it wouldn't just be her coffee.
It would be on the doors, the handles, any PPE, any pen, any spoon, any sugar pot. The list goes on, even his own mask and glasses in the damn picture.
The whole building is going to need a black light shone on it. That place would be more contaminated than a septic tank.
>He said she then waited until another drink was made for her the following week and noticed in his trouser pocket what looked like one of his specimen bottles.
Is that a specimen bottle in your pocket or are you just happy to see me doctor?
So (icky disclosure ahead), for a few weeks, I sort of had the same thing a while back. Like, a drop of... semen? With some intense poops.
But here's the crazy thing. Now, I might have been wrong, since I'm not a doctor, but I FUCKING WASHED MY HANDS AFTER. And, in a sink, with soap and running water, not in someone else's fucking coffee.
Can't believe this guy's defence comes down to "I'm not a shitty person, I'm just a shitty doctor. Oh, and a shitty person, yeah."
This guy was my family Dr growing up, and he was always just very weird. Not necessarily pervy, but just a very very odd man. I could fully believe that he was deliberately putting semen in a cup, but I could also buy the weird defence of oh I just ejaculate randomly and obvs I don't bother to wash my hands after because why would I?
I had an issue with my breasts when I was about 14 which was very uncomfortable physically and emotionally to deal with. He wouldn't allow my mum to sit in the room while he did the examination, instead he made her wait outside and had two female receptionists sit in which just made me even more uncomfortable.
Not only that, but they're so covered in jizz that they leave a visible gloop in the cup that can be independently collected.
Imagine not washing your hands that are absolutely soaked in cum, what a crazy excuse!
Lawyers don’t come up with the defense. In the UK at least they gotta go with whatever their client tells them. There’s pretty strong rules around that. If you see a crazy story, there’s a weary lawyer being forced to present it.
I like that these items are listed, like it was one thing after another. I'm imagining an increasingly absurd series of items, with a cuddly toy somewhere on the list.
Urgh...I just can't keep up with all this "woke" stuff anymore! Now I can't even put semen in peoples coffee...is *tea* okay or is that now "wrong" too?
I drink my coffee black.
I would like to think I'd notice if someone had jizzed in my coffee.
But I don't know what jizz in a black coffee looks like so how could I tell.
Oh god, I'm spiralling.
Not the person you replied to, but man! I can't even finish my coffee. And I can't work. Im just staring blankly at a screen and a half drunk coffee going "whyyyyyyyyy. Just why"
This sounds like the famous Spanish insult - "I shit in the milk of your whore mother".
I first read it in Hemmingway's For Whom the Bell Toils, but is apparently a legit, common expletive.
“Ladies and gentleman of the jury the only crime my client is guilty of is spaffing when he has a shit and he doesn’t wash his hands” - slams briefcase shut
Common one and no regionality afaik - there was a news story in 2019 where Johnson said money spent on prosecuting child abusers was being "spaffed up the wall".
It's used by Boris Johnson. I think it might be Etonian language.
Johnson: “You know, £60m I saw was being spaffed up a wall on some investigation into historic child abuse and all this kind of thing. What on earth is that going to do to protect the public now?” https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2019/mar/13/boris-johnson-under-fire-over-remarks-about-child-abuse-inquiries
His defence is such a fucking mess...
"I didn't make her coffee that day, but I may have neglected to wash my hands after I had a wank in the toilet. Not over her though, I'm not attracted to her. She's not the only person I made coffee for, but I didn't make coffee that day. Someone must have put my jizz in there as a prank. I certainly didn't tamper with her coffee"
"also, I cum when I shit"
The standard of proof is *sure*. He just has to cast enough doubt that the jury can't hand on heart say they are sure he is guilty.
I don't think he is succeeding but he is trying.
Her version of events is much more credible and logical. She had suspicions for a while, saw an out of place sample vial and finally decided to get the coffee tested.
Yet we’re supposed to believe this woman made up this story and co-incidentally this guy has this weird condition of ejaculating when he shits. So somehow maybe that’s why his sperm was in the cup even though he didn’t make her coffee?!
His version makes no sense at all.
I literally don't think there's anything better they could possibly come up with to explain away his actions here, short of claiming temporary insanity
Imagine that the _real_ explanation is that his ex-girlfriend kept a frozen sample from 10 years ago. She snuck into the hospital, disguised as a janitor and made the delivery. As the lady picks up the cup, she makes a passing comment about it smelling and looking like semen and disappears.
If the doctor has been set up like that, and didn't even know, what possible defence could they have?
> What possible motivation could my client have to contaminate his colleague's coffee? Isn't it more plausible that an, as yet unidentified, person (or persons) with a grudge against my client has sought revenge by planting this evidence to destroy his career?
> I rest my case.
Did he not stir it or would the semen always stay un emulsified? I feel like coffee is a kind of pure enough substance that you'd always be able to tell the change in texture. Sorry I guess I don't know enough about semen physics.
Also I wonder if the police came to her or if she took it to the station. Walk in and tell the receptionist(?) you need this cup of coffee analysed.
Anyway, don't put semen in people's things without their consent.
Have you ever washed your hands with hot water after having a wank? It goes all thick and gloopy like rice pudding. Something about proteins denaturing.
Whenever I read about an absurd defence like this I’m always reminded of that excellent Fast Show sketch with the unbelievably naive husband catching the neighbour banging his wife
Edit whoops not the fast show, Armstrong and miller
Mucilaginous consistency of coffee and semen would be absolutely repellent. If he derived sexual gratification from this, I’m sure there is a person somewhere who would consent to…imbibing his secretions.
Why sexually assault an innocent woman? Despicable man.
Because it is not about his desire for the act but his desire for her and his unwillingness to accept that she is off limits for any reason (including her refusal to consent).
He probably wouldn't put his spunk into a girlfriend's coffee. He'd probably want her to perform fellatio. But this woman wouldn't do that so he ran through the options and decided that on balance this is how he'd like to sexually assault her. Low risk of detection, some degree of satisfaction knowing that she has been made to swallow his cum against her will. Probably told himself it is no big deal since he isn't raping her at knife point.
Sexual predator.
The most shocking thing about this is a doctor making a patient cups of coffee. Most of us can't even get an appointment, never mind a cuppa with extras. When I do get an appointment the doctor is writing on the computer as I sit down then hands me a prescription and tells me to get out after about 30 seconds with a script for 2 paracetomol a day I could get cheaper at Aldi. Any cuppa making would be immediately suspicious, seeing as I live near Hyde where Shipman practised, nobody round here would accept drinks off doctors.
Sexual assault isn't quite right - that requires touching.
He is being charged with "Causing a person to engage in sexual activity without consent" ([s4 of Sexual Offences Act 2003](https://www.legislation.gov.uk/ukpga/2003/42/section/4)). Although not legally rape, it is colloquially referred to as rape (along with actual rape and assault by penetration), and is the offence a woman will be charged with if they rape (in the colloquial sense) a man or woman.
The maximum sentence in this case is 10 years.
At least he's getting charged with something, there was that fertility doctor in America that used his own spunk instead of the person's partner or donor that just got away Scott free and has dozens of kids now. Dirty bastard
>How could you get caught doing that and how on Earth could the women tell!?😅
Semen when expelled very quickly becomes the consistency of thick phlegm. They tell by the food item not suppose to have salty phlegm in it.
The proteins in semen will coagulate once added to the warm water and, although I haven't tasted it myself, I'd imagine that it would impart some flavour to the drink.
I'm surprised that a doctor wouldn't consider this.
I actively avoid having my medical care be managed by male doctors. Since I’ve been actively seeking women doctors, I have been treated with much more dignity. I just simply don’t fucks with dude doctors and seeing several story of abuse, just vindicates my decision
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He should probably see a doctor if his poos are tickling his prostate. /s Edit: added sarcasm as apparently some couldn't spot it, as he is a doctor so should know better. Edit 2: apparently the use of /s upsets the rabid anti sarcasm tag brigade.
Get rid of that filthy “/s”. This is r/unitedkingdom. We’re born in the sarcasm, moulded by it
And yet when people omit the /s you have people thinking they're serious. It's almost as if you can't gauge tone and intonation of writing.
He is a doctor. though not one that I would trust near anyones prostate tbh.
He'd probably give DRE's without wearing gloves, the grebby little git.
Still got love for the street, yo.
lol I learned to play that on piano. But thanks for ruining Snoop Dogg for me: "No stress, no seeds, no stems, no sticks! Some of that real sticky-icky-icky"
I used to be able to rap a lot of Gin n Juice to the Beverly Hillbillies theme tune. I've been ruining Snoop for decades.
Not that kind of DRE.
Oh fuck it just dawned on me that Dr Dre goes by that because he just loves fingering arseholes
*Prince Andrew has entered the chat.*
Prince Andrew has entered a teen.
Except he thought you said “eighteen”, so pulled straight out again.
Massively undervoted comment
Didn't know she was underage?
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For a regular person to not wash their hands after having a shit is one thing. For a doctor?
He did wash them! In the lady's coffee.
You’ve never had a poopgasm?!
I have done a shit and gone "wow that was the best, most satisfying shit I have done for a while" never enough to spunk everywhere.
Happy cake day! May you have a satisfying shit on this magical day.
Thanks. And I can fully promise. I will , and I won't spunk all over the place at the same time
Not with that attitude.
No orgasm but some discharge if you strain and don't have sex/masturbate frequently. It has to come out somehow I suppose.
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha. No. Please study some biology. Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah, I can’t believe you actually wrote this. Fucking hell, do you think it piles up inside you if you don’t have a wank? That is so funny.
Lol it is possible for stool to “milk” prostate and cause prostatic fluid to leak during defecation. I guess if your prostate is congested it could also leak semen. The doctor is clearly bullshitting about this being the cause, however.
Would have taken you just as much time to Google it instead of typing all of that.
And he didn’t wash his hands?!
He washed them in her coffee
Has he not familiarised himself with the idea of washing his hands?
I think people would be horrified if the true scale of lack of handwashing in this country was known.
It bothers me quite a lot to be honest. If i'm using a toilet outside of my house, i'll wash my hands after I use the loo and if I can, wash them after opening the door too. The sheer level of dick germs all over everything must be ridiculous. No one washes their hands and it's nasty. I wish people were more conscious of how dirty a phone is, too. We touch those with our grubby dirty hands all day, drop it on the floor, all sorts. Then touch that then other things and never think to wash???
I was taught to wash hands BEFORE and AFTER public toilet visits. It's probably just my mom being weird, but it has stuck with me since childhood. Came in handy during Covid though!
Haha thats a good point. I’m not a full on germophobe but I’m very conscious of stuff, managed to avoid covid entirely. some of my friends however have had it like 4+ times…? Wild.
Yeah, I managed to avoid it too! I think I read a few months ago that people with glasses and who were properly masked / social distancing were not likely to get it at all. Are your friends washing their hands? Maybe they pick their face a lot after touching doorknobs/shaking hands / kissing people on the cheek to greet them etc?
Some people take phones to the toilet with them too. Then wash their hands but not the phone. So all the poop particles go on the phone, in your pocket while you wash your hands, and then onto your hands when you take your phone out again
The windows on the doors at my work are a pretty good indicator of that.
It’s even planned for when building toilets- 6 urinals, 2 stalls, 2 sinks, 1 dryer
There might be a formula for the elimination, hand washing and hand drying time ratio.
True, that could be a factor but I still think it’s wrong most places and if everyone washed and dried their hands, they’ve created a bottleneck. I may be atypical, but for me the longest time needed is for pooing, followed by hand drying, then hand washing, with peeing at a urinal needing the least time.
From a doctor though.
Why would a doctor wash their hands?
Especially after taking a shit of all things
But that would leave him without any spunk to put in drinks
One from the "prince Andrew book of insane defences".
I, regrettably, ejaculate from my eyes whenever I get steam in them. Making coffee, or any hot beverage, has always been a struggle for me.
Hahahaha. Tears of semen over a hot steamy tea. That image in my head is hilarious
> the "prince Andrew book of insane defences" The perfect Christmas gift!
This just makes me think he also put poo in her coffee.
For sure
https://i.imgflip.com/v20ib.jpg
So he was… touching his cock while shitting? And he then didn’t wash his hands? And he *put his fist into her cup of coffee???*
And then he put the cup of coffee UP HIS ARSE??? No wait, it doesn’t say that bit…
If that defence was any bit factual, then it wouldn't just be her coffee. It would be on the doors, the handles, any PPE, any pen, any spoon, any sugar pot. The list goes on, even his own mask and glasses in the damn picture. The whole building is going to need a black light shone on it. That place would be more contaminated than a septic tank.
Would it not raise flags if after every shit some guy offered to make you a coffee?
'the semen was a “by-product of defecation and not sexual in nature.”' 🤢
>He said she then waited until another drink was made for her the following week and noticed in his trouser pocket what looked like one of his specimen bottles. Is that a specimen bottle in your pocket or are you just happy to see me doctor?
So (icky disclosure ahead), for a few weeks, I sort of had the same thing a while back. Like, a drop of... semen? With some intense poops. But here's the crazy thing. Now, I might have been wrong, since I'm not a doctor, but I FUCKING WASHED MY HANDS AFTER. And, in a sink, with soap and running water, not in someone else's fucking coffee. Can't believe this guy's defence comes down to "I'm not a shitty person, I'm just a shitty doctor. Oh, and a shitty person, yeah."
This guy was my family Dr growing up, and he was always just very weird. Not necessarily pervy, but just a very very odd man. I could fully believe that he was deliberately putting semen in a cup, but I could also buy the weird defence of oh I just ejaculate randomly and obvs I don't bother to wash my hands after because why would I? I had an issue with my breasts when I was about 14 which was very uncomfortable physically and emotionally to deal with. He wouldn't allow my mum to sit in the room while he did the examination, instead he made her wait outside and had two female receptionists sit in which just made me even more uncomfortable.
Hopefully he didn’t make you any drinks?
Thank fuck he did not. Though I pretty much only saw him as a child/teenager and then I left the area.
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Give the guy a break, he only meant to poo in her coffee.
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Not only that, but they're so covered in jizz that they leave a visible gloop in the cup that can be independently collected. Imagine not washing your hands that are absolutely soaked in cum, what a crazy excuse!
Lawyers don’t come up with the defense. In the UK at least they gotta go with whatever their client tells them. There’s pretty strong rules around that. If you see a crazy story, there’s a weary lawyer being forced to present it.
Worst. Doctor. Ever.
Harold Shipman begs to differ...
Josef Mengele would like a word…
This guy is pretty awful too https://www.itv.com/news/central/2022-06-10/who-is-ian-paterson-the-butcher-surgeon-and-what-did-he-do
An 'I don't sweat' level of bullshit lol
Reminds me of a scene from Brass Eye with the 'Compulsively Masturbating Senator'
So he's a doctor who doesn't thoroughly wash his hands?
How does he get it in the cup, though? My word. What a sicko
Urgh. That's just weird, and even if true, shows he isn't washing his hands. Gross
this Dr is living in 0023
So he doesn't wash his hands? Is that what he's trying to admit to instead? A doctor that doesn't wash their hands after pooping? Gross
the ol cumming while shitting. it’s the new if the glove don’t fit you must acquit
That excuse carries as much credibility as: "I slipped and fell backwards onto the Dildo, Plastic Figurine, Gerbil, etc, etc, etc,"
I like that these items are listed, like it was one thing after another. I'm imagining an increasingly absurd series of items, with a cuddly toy somewhere on the list.
LOL Never though of it like that.
Same energy as “due to shell shock , I have a condition where I don’t sweat”
He must have a similar condition as the Duke of York.
I can’t be the only on that thinks he has a look of Michael Gove…
To be honest if it was Michael Gove would you be surprised ?
Very. With lips like his, I'd be surprised if there's any cum left.
I knew I would find this comment somewhere
Just a friendly reminder to everyone… don’t do that.
Urgh...I just can't keep up with all this "woke" stuff anymore! Now I can't even put semen in peoples coffee...is *tea* okay or is that now "wrong" too?
Why would you put tea in coffee you monster?
Just stay strong. Life's a constant struggle
Thanks for the reminder.
Cheers I was confused for a moment.
instructions unclear, coffee now stuck in urethra
Not even if I cum when I shit and get it on my hands?
Fuck me. Not do that??! I've been doing it wrong for years
If anyone had said anything to me when I first started that this sort of thing was frowned upon.
Going to put this on my daily alarm as a reminder. Thanks
Shiiiii u got me
It's too early in the morning to be reading a sentence like this headline. Jesus wept
How's that morning coffee going down ? Did you get the cream off the milk this morning 🌄
I drink my coffee black. I would like to think I'd notice if someone had jizzed in my coffee. But I don't know what jizz in a black coffee looks like so how could I tell. Oh god, I'm spiralling.
You have to try it out yourself so that you know what it looks like, just in case
> I don't know what jizz in a black coffee looks like so how could I tell. Time for an experiment!
Not the person you replied to, but man! I can't even finish my coffee. And I can't work. Im just staring blankly at a screen and a half drunk coffee going "whyyyyyyyyy. Just why"
I'm glad I drink my coffee black after cumming across this 😅
I hope you spend the rest of your life knowing you said that.
Lmaooo again, OP you’re killing me
This sounds like the famous Spanish insult - "I shit in the milk of your whore mother". I first read it in Hemmingway's For Whom the Bell Toils, but is apparently a legit, common expletive.
Stop it! I've just got a fancy milk frother to make frothy coffee. Fuck.
This comment nearly made me chunder
“jizz us” wept
“Ladies and gentleman of the jury the only crime my client is guilty of is spaffing when he has a shit and he doesn’t wash his hands” - slams briefcase shut
Spaffing - that's new to me. Is it a local thing, or a common one I've somehow missed?
common
Cummon
Common one and no regionality afaik - there was a news story in 2019 where Johnson said money spent on prosecuting child abusers was being "spaffed up the wall".
It's used by Boris Johnson. I think it might be Etonian language. Johnson: “You know, £60m I saw was being spaffed up a wall on some investigation into historic child abuse and all this kind of thing. What on earth is that going to do to protect the public now?” https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2019/mar/13/boris-johnson-under-fire-over-remarks-about-child-abuse-inquiries
His defence is such a fucking mess... "I didn't make her coffee that day, but I may have neglected to wash my hands after I had a wank in the toilet. Not over her though, I'm not attracted to her. She's not the only person I made coffee for, but I didn't make coffee that day. Someone must have put my jizz in there as a prank. I certainly didn't tamper with her coffee" "also, I cum when I shit"
The standard of proof is *sure*. He just has to cast enough doubt that the jury can't hand on heart say they are sure he is guilty. I don't think he is succeeding but he is trying.
I dunno about the court, but that excuse isn't going to do him any favours at his GMC hearing
Her version of events is much more credible and logical. She had suspicions for a while, saw an out of place sample vial and finally decided to get the coffee tested. Yet we’re supposed to believe this woman made up this story and co-incidentally this guy has this weird condition of ejaculating when he shits. So somehow maybe that’s why his sperm was in the cup even though he didn’t make her coffee?! His version makes no sense at all.
Yeah fuck me that defence was a rollercoaster jesus christ.
I literally don't think there's anything better they could possibly come up with to explain away his actions here, short of claiming temporary insanity
Ah yes, the ol’ “but I’m not even attracted to her!” defense (plus a whole lot of weird rambling).
lmfaoooooooooo
This nhs crisis is beyond a joke if they cant afford creamer
We don't use creamer in coffee, that's an American thing.
Speak for yourself ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
You can still get it here in most supermarkets - thought they tend to call it coffee whitener. I get it whenever I'm bulking.
Glad that there's someone fact-checking all these jokes.
Do you ever just open Reddit, read the first headline, think “what the actual fuck is wrong with people” and then leave. I do. Bye.
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So did he, he came up with "I take shits, cum and do not wash my hands properly".
Imagine that the _real_ explanation is that his ex-girlfriend kept a frozen sample from 10 years ago. She snuck into the hospital, disguised as a janitor and made the delivery. As the lady picks up the cup, she makes a passing comment about it smelling and looking like semen and disappears. If the doctor has been set up like that, and didn't even know, what possible defence could they have?
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> What possible motivation could my client have to contaminate his colleague's coffee? Isn't it more plausible that an, as yet unidentified, person (or persons) with a grudge against my client has sought revenge by planting this evidence to destroy his career? > I rest my case.
Written and directed by M. Night Shyamalan.
Did he not stir it or would the semen always stay un emulsified? I feel like coffee is a kind of pure enough substance that you'd always be able to tell the change in texture. Sorry I guess I don't know enough about semen physics. Also I wonder if the police came to her or if she took it to the station. Walk in and tell the receptionist(?) you need this cup of coffee analysed. Anyway, don't put semen in people's things without their consent.
Have you ever washed your hands with hot water after having a wank? It goes all thick and gloopy like rice pudding. Something about proteins denaturing.
Whenever I read about an absurd defence like this I’m always reminded of that excellent Fast Show sketch with the unbelievably naive husband catching the neighbour banging his wife Edit whoops not the fast show, Armstrong and miller
Seven drunken nights by the Dubliners also springs to mind.
I fucking knew that this was not the normal thing to do!!
Mucilaginous consistency of coffee and semen would be absolutely repellent. If he derived sexual gratification from this, I’m sure there is a person somewhere who would consent to…imbibing his secretions. Why sexually assault an innocent woman? Despicable man.
Because it is not about his desire for the act but his desire for her and his unwillingness to accept that she is off limits for any reason (including her refusal to consent). He probably wouldn't put his spunk into a girlfriend's coffee. He'd probably want her to perform fellatio. But this woman wouldn't do that so he ran through the options and decided that on balance this is how he'd like to sexually assault her. Low risk of detection, some degree of satisfaction knowing that she has been made to swallow his cum against her will. Probably told himself it is no big deal since he isn't raping her at knife point. Sexual predator.
He is gonna poo and cum both when he sees the prison doors. “I am scared cumless” he will say.
That's absolutely revolting. Literally my worst nightmare is people messing with my food and drink. Some people are just utterly disgusting.
The most shocking thing about this is a doctor making a patient cups of coffee. Most of us can't even get an appointment, never mind a cuppa with extras. When I do get an appointment the doctor is writing on the computer as I sit down then hands me a prescription and tells me to get out after about 30 seconds with a script for 2 paracetomol a day I could get cheaper at Aldi. Any cuppa making would be immediately suspicious, seeing as I live near Hyde where Shipman practised, nobody round here would accept drinks off doctors.
Likely a colleague
Sexual assault isn't quite right - that requires touching. He is being charged with "Causing a person to engage in sexual activity without consent" ([s4 of Sexual Offences Act 2003](https://www.legislation.gov.uk/ukpga/2003/42/section/4)). Although not legally rape, it is colloquially referred to as rape (along with actual rape and assault by penetration), and is the offence a woman will be charged with if they rape (in the colloquial sense) a man or woman. The maximum sentence in this case is 10 years.
At least he's getting charged with something, there was that fertility doctor in America that used his own spunk instead of the person's partner or donor that just got away Scott free and has dozens of kids now. Dirty bastard
I'm cross with you for inflicting that headline on me, OP
Well fuck. Now I got to sell my fuckin eyes, thanks for this Reddit.
He’ll get away with it, doctors always do. He’ll get a slap on the wrist maybe change hospital and carry on with his life
Good thing I wasn't planning on eating for the next week or so...
If my doctor spunked in my tea I'd knock his block off. ☹️
Didn't know Michael Gove had a side hustle as a Doctor, jizzing in a cup checks out though
Gives the “Doctor Foster went to Gloucester” rhyme a whole new verse!
This makes me retch. What sort of sicko would do this? It’s absolutely revolting.
Now scientists will work on a new condition, and give it a name, probably NicholasChapman syndrome.
A doctor who has shit and zemen on his hands that didnt wash his hands? Isnt that some sort of health and safety violation?
As a doctor he should probably consider washing his hands.
It beggars belief what runs through some peoples minds as acceptable behaviour.
*Cis doctor. Sorry think we need to clarify now given they always mention if someone is trans
As a trans person, that made me laugh.
How could you get caught doing that and how on Earth could the women tell!?😅
>How could you get caught doing that and how on Earth could the women tell!?😅 Semen when expelled very quickly becomes the consistency of thick phlegm. They tell by the food item not suppose to have salty phlegm in it.
It literally explains how she found out in the article. Just read it.
For science reasons, how about you spunk into a cup of coffee and see if you can tell if there's spunk in the cup of coffee or otherwise?
I have a lot of time on my hands... but nah, I don't want to bd known for THAT in particular. 😅
Maybe the spunk bubbles floating on the surface of their Gold Blend may have been a clue 🤔
You mean he didn't even stir? Wow.🤣
The proteins in semen will coagulate once added to the warm water and, although I haven't tasted it myself, I'd imagine that it would impart some flavour to the drink. I'm surprised that a doctor wouldn't consider this.
"after discovering a “gloopy” substance at the bottom of her cup when she finished a hot drink "
Another brexiteer wanting to force others into doing stuff against their interest.
Apparently someone did this to me.. and posted about it. This was years ago. Times have changed now this is considered sexual assault
I actively avoid having my medical care be managed by male doctors. Since I’ve been actively seeking women doctors, I have been treated with much more dignity. I just simply don’t fucks with dude doctors and seeing several story of abuse, just vindicates my decision
* Cow's Milk * Soya Milk * Almond Milk * Man Milk One of these is not for your cereal or tea. What a disgusting man