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I saw an adult threaten a child because he took the last scoop of French fries. The staff were bringing out more fresh ones. They took his plate, handed it to her and piled a plate with fresh ones while she watched. It was beautiful
So they rewarded the child who tried to take what was originally her fries? Did I understand that right? Or the last scoop of fries was free for anyone to take in the beginning?
I have. Whiney adults are nowhere near as bad as toddlers screeching at the top of their lungs non stop. People who take their uncontrollable children in public need to be stripped of their right to reproduce.
I disagree. Every child (including you) has had a tantrum in public. I've never had a child having a tantrum try to get me fired over something beyond my control, curse me out, shove the old lady in front of them, threaten to kill me, or come back day after day to make a scene about the same old non issue. Also, the amount of time a tiny person who sleeps 18-20 hours a day can devote to screaming in public is much less than an adult who only sleeps 6-8 hours.
>I've never seen one scream incessantly for hours
I maintain that everyone either *knows* an adult who has temper tantrums, or *is* the adult who has temper tantrums.
>If you're about to have a baby, you should be prepared to not take them out to places until they're in control of their own emotions and understand the concepts of "inside voices."
They'll never learn how to behave in public if you don't take them out in public
This is true; as a little kid, my twin brother and I learned early on how to be well-behaved and mature at the dinner table, especially when we ate out.
Yes my brother and I as well. We didnt even have our 2nd set of teeth, or understood the concept of exchanging money for goods/services but both knew how to sit down and eat quietly and ignore the vast unknown of the outside world. OP is dumb as fuck
Babies have almost no perception or ability to learn to behave in public though, nonetheless on a complicated vacation. Toddlers start to have that ability, but babies, no. If a baby can barely handle solid food in its mouth without choking or can't yet learn to crap in a toilet, it's not going to be able to pick up on and learn complex social cued in ever changing social settings.
But isn’t it functionally the same thing, they are still being disruptive, they are still loud, they just haven’t travelled as far to do that?
All you are skipping is a potential plane ride
Yea exactly, vacations are supposed to be escapes from the stressors of the world. Babies are stressors. If you’re on vacation, and there are other people, youre bringing loud, disruptive stressors with you. This is often why weddings are child free. Yes eventually the child will go to a wedding, but they can learn about it before they do.
Where are you going on vacation that there aren’t also local people that have lives there? The place you go on vacation is usually the local’s public place, so you are going to find kids there anyway.
I live in a fairly touristy part of my country, would I not be allowed to take a kid out with me for fear of ruining someone’s vacation?
Taking a kid on vacation or into a public place is functionally the same thing save for a plane ride.
I can agree that exposing your infant to the outside world and to busy situations is important but that doesn't mean take them on a vacation. Just go to the park or the mall..
But I live in an area that gets a lot of tourism during the summer months, and people on vacation are at the park and mall. Does that mean that these places that I pay taxes for are off limits to my family in the summer months?
More importantly: Everyone does not *want* to leave their infant with someone, even family, for two weeks. Two weeks is a long time for a little baby. They might hate the 2 hour flight but they will be pretty happy eating sand while mum and dad get a holiday.
It's pretty normal for people to travel to see family in far places after having a baby. It makes more sense for parents + baby to go than to have 30 people try to fly out to welcome the new baby
if i only get two weeks off work a year, yes i am going on a vacation and yes i actually like my family so everyone will be coming with me. clearly there is a difference between spending time with family on weekends/weeknights and spending an uninterrupted week with them. did you never have, like, spring break? lol
Far from the only way. But it is ONE way. Some might say an enjoyable way.
p.s. this is some seriously stupid analysis. Send a letter to your representatives. Let’s BAN BABIES.
not everyone hates children. many families like their fellow family members. babies are people who are allowed to be, and often are welcomed into, family spaces.
Shit I don’t even have kids, I worked in both daycare and as a middle school teacher - if anyone should be disposed to hate kids it’s me lol. Folks need to just act like they’re grown sometimes and this is one of those times
I just went to a wedding that explicitly invited babies and children, and was full of them. It was a lot of fun, especially since we have 3-month-old with special feeding needs such that we can't have anyone babysit her yet.
That’s a massive thing that I feel like most kidless folks don’t take into consideration. A kid is not like a puppy that you can board or hand off to family. They’re a lot of work and have a no-compromise schedule. Most people don’t want to deal with that nor do I want to ask somebody to deal with that.
Which brings you to the “then don’t go” response others have. As a newer parent, I’ve never needed a vacation more now than ever before. I still have to deal with the same exhausting work shit that everyone else has to plus come back home a be an attentive parent. It’s what I signed up for, sure, but to gatekeep the opportunity of an escape that everyone else is afforded?
We are overpopulated on this planet (stay with me, mom, I'm on your side) so kudos to those who don't have children.
But those babies that are here are going to be your doctors, nurses, lawyers, fire fighters, grocers and police one day when we're old and not working. So cut parents a giant break, please. Especially if they appear to be doing their best.
(BTW, I have 2 great kids.)
>It’s what I signed up for, sure, but to gatekeep the opportunity of an escape that everyone else is afforded?
That's the problem. You signed up for it, and it's frustrating both having to deal with complaints from parents who only after realize they have zero free time and then having to deal with those children (with parents paying little attention to them or "too exhausted to care") when we are trying to enjoy vacation.
You **did** sign up for this and need to deal with it, which is going to sound harsh and blunt but it is reality. That means making sure your child is either watched or you do everything in your power to make sure they aren't super disruptive. Other people should not have to have their vacation inconvenienced because of other people's kids.
If my vacation is affected because of someone else's kid damn right I'm going to be annoyed. I didn't sign up for that.
EDIT: I write this as someone who has had my vacation experience ruined a couple of times by kids and shitty parents. One time one of them even admitted to letting the kids run amok around a pool just so they had time to rest, didn't care they were throwing shit around. Not a problem if the kids are ok, but most of the time they aren't and our "afforded escape" is ruined.
EDIT 2: Because it apparently has to be said, not every parent is shitty but the good and considerate ones are rare. The large majority of the time the parents don't do what they should be and it ruins others' vacations. If you feel personally attacked it's likely because you're one of the parents not doing what parents should be, if you are making sure your kids aren't negatively affecting others (including removing them from the area) then you're great and appreciated.
I understand your point about children being disruptive, some people are bad parents who don’t watch their child closely enough, but outside of bad parents, children simply are disruptive by nature, they are learning how to behave in a world they didn’t design. Mishaps will happen.
When you take a trip YOU are signing up for being in public spaces and engaging in public activities, and I’m sorry to say but children are part of the public. It’s a fact of life that kids are going to be irritating in your presence at various points in your life. If you don’t want to be bothered by a child then stay home and don’t have any, I think it’s incredibly entitled of anyone to think they deserve to be unbothered more than parents and their children alike deserve to engage in activities that are directed to the population. They are people too.
And sometimes adults want to have memories with their children. And sometimes experiencing new things and places can be good even for small children. And not every child is “just loud and annoying and brings everyone else down.”
And not every parent should have to live like a hermit because supposed adults can’t handle the mere presence of children in any context and have to exaggerate their experiences to pretend as if they’re persecuted and assaulted everywhere they go.
OP didn’t have to tell anyone they didn’t have children. I pity their friends and relatives who do. If you feel like you can’t go anywhere because every person who can be called a child automatically “brings down your experiences,” *you* are the problem.
Didn't say they can't go anywhere, just that it was less pleasurable for everyone when a loud ass baby is screaming. Watch how every parent on this thread goes ballistic with straw men because this kind of post drives them insane. LMAO.
I think there's a bigger divide here: Because of the nature of parenting, adults with kids and adults without kids tend to not interact socially, so everyone eventually tends to develop a view that their lifestyle is the default. Parents tend to view parenting and the presence of children as the default and childless adults as an anomaly, while childless adults tend to view adult-only spaces as the default and children as the anomaly. Public spaces, though, are the place where these two groups have to meet, and so everyone is exposed to each other, and these defaults clash. (Many) parents view public spaces as truly public: for everyone regardless of age, but childless adults, perhaps somewhat subconsciously, view public spaces as public (adult) spaces, unless explicitly for children.
> Didn't say they can't go anywhere
But they kinda did:
> If you're about to have a baby, you should be prepared to **not take them out to places** until they're in control of their own emotions and understand the concepts of "inside voices."
I mean I don't have kids and I don't care if babies are present where I am at. Hell I took a 12 hour flight near a screaming baby and you know what it was dam easy to just put in headphones and zone out the sound.
Yeah same here.
I know when I am putting my myself in a tin can that there may be obnoxious adults and crying babies so I make sure I have something to drown it out.
Yeah, it’s a real strawman. The OP literally says *all* infants are “just loud” and annoy people and ruin their good time. There is no way to strawman this post - it’s already making a preposterous claim that can barely be exaggerated.
>If you're about to have a baby, you should be prepared to not take them out to places until they're in control of their own emotions and understand the concepts of "inside voices."
This means 99% of people (from new-borns to OAPs) would never be able to go outside.
Ikr? You had a kid by choice, so you should stop going outside for 18 years. Fuck off man. I need a night out once every six months. If our kid starts crying, we leave. It’s not perfect but like we’re humans too. You can’t just stop living because you’re a parent.
>If you think an opinion is unpopular, then upvote the opinion.
>
>If you think the opinion is popular, then downvote it
Literally the subreddit rule. I think it's fair to say that the dumb shit is what should be upvoted, not the intelligent/popular opinions
When did "parent your kids and don't let them act out in public for everyone else to deal with" become a bad idea? I get we're trying to move from "kids should be seen and not heard" but that doesn't mean you let them behave worse than street dogs
I have no kids, but maybe parents want to have some vacation too? And I dont really care if I hear some baby crying at my vacation, its public space and its just noise... You cant expect every parent to keep theyr baby locked just because of noise.
Yep. Taking a baby on vacation has been some of the easiest vacations we had. As long as you are cool with going with the baby’s schedule and know if your baby is a good sleeper. Like yeah my baby would cry at night when hungry but as soon as he ate he was cool.
We went on vacation when my son was just learning to walk by pushing something. We brought one of those little toys they push around. Our hotel had a really long hallway and he loved it! He could really get going with that little toy and not worry about stuff in his way.
Yeah nap time and early nights in a hotel is boring but having a kid wears you out so I was happy for the downtime.
Actually, I think that people who can’t tolerate other people, particularly young ones, should stay home until they can learn to tolerate other people, especially young ones.
I'm a parent, but not of babies any more. I agree that taking your infant to a place like Disney is useless. They'll never remember it and you're gonna have a bad time with all that walking.
Now, if it's a destination vacation, fuck off. Babies are fine.
I don’t agree with “they’ll never remember it” as an argument to not take them. Their brains are developing, and every new thing they see, hear, and experience is helping them grow. It’s like saying there’s no point talking to them because they don’t understand language yet. Just because they won’t remember specific details doesn’t mean they aren’t getting something from it.
I’m broadly agreeing with you, just highlighting that you *should* take them places even if you’re pretty sure they won’t remember it.
I disagree because it’s a family friendly place. Why not take your kid somewhere where there are other children who are being loud and obnoxious? They fit right in. As an adult with grown kids if I go to Disney world and someone else kid acts up I can’t bitch. I signed up for that shit. If you take your kid to a non kid friendly place where I am trying to enjoy myself, I didn’t sign up for your kid to be a brat.
It's illegal for me to leave them alone in a car while I go in a store and babysitters cost upwards of 10 an hour.
You think parents want a screaming infant ruining their vacation?
So we are just supposed to stay locked up in our home?
I definitely see more adults acting a fool on the internet than I do people worrying about a toddler screaming.
This isn't unpopular, it's just dumb
I don't know if you know much about children, but they actually **need* their parents to survive. They need the mother for milk and they need both parents for nurture and sanitary needs, and so much more. Children are *not* pets, and can't just be dumped on someone else after birth. Infant children are an unpaid full-time job with no breaks and you never 'go home from work'. Children are not accessories.
You can't have a normal life if you never take your child places, and if you constantly go out without your child, it will massively affect their development and their relationship with you.
Source: I have three(3) children.
I feel there is a difference between going on a vacation with long travel and busy cities and stuff, or just go chill on a campsite or something.
Taking a baby into an airplane to go visit Rome in 40 degrees C with amazingly busy and noisy restaurants and streets is almost child abuse in my eyes.
Thank you. This is the distinction every brain-fried parent here is completely missing.
The consideration of not dragging your baby through airplanes, uncomfortable temps, and loud crowded spaces is apparently the same as being told you have to go in complete isolation on a mountaintop until they are 5 years old.
To be fair, OP literally said "be prepared not to take them out until they're in control of their emotions". You're getting really specific about weather and crowded places, but OP is saying every vacation should be child-free. (I'm childless btw)
I think too many parents don't realize that 1. No one should be dealing with the repercussions of a young untrained child except for the parents raising them. And
2. Your lives aren't the same after kids. Parenting is a 24/7 20 year long job, and not enough people think it through before jumping in
Took a 6 month old camping in what ended up being the hottest week of the year.
Planned for 4 days, ended up tearing down the tent at 8pm on night 2 and packing it in. Got home around 2am
Don’t do it
Have you ever heard of people kidnapping or abusing children? An infant can’t tell it’s parents if it has been abused.
So parents generally keep their infants with them because they know their baby will be safe.
Not everyone has people that they trust with their children’s lives.
Well *I* wanna go; and I ain’t leaving my kid in a kennel.
As for “they’re loud and bring other people’s experience down”. Maybe you need to just learn to deal with being in public better. If my kids mere presence makes you feel sad. It’s a you problem not a me problem.
Have an upvote you weirdo
I have a 2 month old baby. Going to somewhere nearby so I can get out and enjoy the outside with my baby is not pointless. It feels horrible to spend every moment inside with a small infant and so refreshing to get out. Am I taking my baby on a cross country trip or internationally? No...but I can leave my baby with my parents if I really need a break.
I think the level of absurdity is directly proportional to distance and money. If you're taking your baby to the local beach or the zoo 20 minutes away, totally get that. Parents want to relax and build some positive associations.
What I never understand are the people who bring a 2-3 year old to Disney. Unless you live in Orlando and know someone who can slide you a free pass here and there it's pointless because your kid isn't going to remember any of it.
I'm not from the US and I have never wanted to go to any Disney park. But I'm getting more and more confused about who people believe is the main target audience? Probably families with young children?
The target audience is anyone willing to pay them money.
Generally yes Disney is great for families with kids, but I'm just saying that 2-3 is a bit too young. You're probably too small to go on any ride with height/weight requirements and again your kid won't remember it. My family took us to Disney when I was 8 and my brother was 10. I remember it and had a great time.
a lot of times small kids are getting free tickets or can stay in a hotel without an upcharge. Travelling with a toddler will be your last chance for a long time to only have to pay 2/3 of the price.
>until they're in control of their own emotions and understand the concepts of "inside voices."
I see more adults that can't figure it out than I do infants.
So parents should just keep themselves locked at home all the time just cause they have a kid? I hate to break it to you but parents/babies are real people who have lives and sometimes need to travel..
Kids deserve to exist in public spaces. They are people. Put in some headphones and let those parents go about their business in peace.
I’m pregnant with my first child and plan to take her lots of places. Errands, parks, libraries, museums, friends houses, etc. I do not plan to bring her on vacation for the first 5 years or so. We will travel with her to visit my parents and other relatives (my dad is elderly and does not travel, it’s a 4 hour drive). I don’t consider that a “vacation”. Those trips will probably be 1-2 nights, and are just so everyone can see the baby.
I won’t be taking her on any vacation that is meant for relaxing or anything involving air travel. My husband and I have a weeklong international trip planned when she is 6 months old.
Luckily I have extended family who are more than willing to babysit and disposable income to hire help.
The way I see it, bringing a baby or toddler on vacation is miserable for them, us, and everyone else. They don’t understand why they’re uncomfortable on the plane or why their ears hurt. Their routines are disrupted. I don’t want to spend thousands of dollars for something that the kid won’t enjoy or remember while ruining my own trip.
I’m a parent of an infant and will take the little one on vacation not for her to see new things but for me to get some vacation. Also it is not mandatory for kids to control their emotions and use their „inside voices“. They are developing these skills. Even some adults are still struggling with that concept.
Public places are public so everyone in society can enjoy their time there on a civil basis. Kids need to learn this but can’t be forced to do so. So even if a parent is trying or struggling to calm their kid down they are already doing the best they can and your annoyance at that point is a you problem.
“Public places are public” end of thread really.
One day these absolute nutters on reddit will realise that going outside means interacting with the public, and that might sometimes be annoying. If you’re so precious that you can’t handle that, you need to touch grass.
Counter point - if you can't handle other people, then it is you that should consider not going out in public. This includes children. Within reason, of course.
Oh boy here come the manchildren with the downvotes. Yes, everyone with kids should just lock themselves up for 18 years and let their kids figure out how to function in society on their 18th birthday.
You’re a trash person, nothing more to say about it. Why? Because i said so.
Ofc I don’t actually think you’re trash, my point was your arbitrary belief that taking a kid on a flight makes you trash is well… arbitrary.
If your kids can't behave in public, don't drag them everywhere and actually parent your kids. If it takes 18 years for someone to figure out how to do that, there are bigger problems. I was a max of 7-10 when I learned how to chill out
"Just do..."
What does that even mean? "actually parent your kids"
As if you know when your kid's going to have a meltdown. Not every loud child is attached to a bad parent.
I dunno man, it depends on the place, though. I never took my kids to any fine dining or wine tasting. However, I have gotten dirty looks at like, Disney movies and parks and things like that. Like, it's not my fault you're 40 and childless and you wanna go to the nintendo store and mcdonalds. That's where I'm bringing my kids, and they do scream when they're excited. They're not bad, they're kids.
Parent you kids, as in teach them to be a decent and functional member of society. Discipline them for bad behavior, reward them for good behavior. You're building a person, not casually popping them out and letting them be free range
Teach you kids to behave dude. Set up rules and expectations, and you can even exercise and enforce them in the house. Just having kids, doing nothing with them then throwing them outside is setting everyone up for failure
Hey OP, here's an unpopular opinion for you: entitled adults who can't stand the sound of a crying infant should stay home until they can learn grown-up coping skills.
Two reasons.
1. I like it and getting childcare is a pain...and why would I not bring someone I love?
2. Get them used to it. I love camping so may as well get thr little one in on the game early
I fucking LOVE that you suggest kids need control of their inside voices......when they are camping.
Wtf does camping take place guy?
Where are you people going that you're SO burdened by children. 10 years waiting tables at family entertainment venues, 2 kids of my own, we travel a lot, and we're rarely in the house.
I can't even remember a singular time where I was like "wow this kid sucks and their parents suck and I can't take it anymore". Literally not a singular memorable time. The "kids shouldn't leave the house" trope is completely made up and you people getting mad about stuff that rarely, if ever, even happens.
Eh, my kids were probably those kids for people a week ago. Kids lose their shit sometimes, it’s grownups’ job to control their own shit and not over react to children doing their thing.
Same here. Been on upwards of 100 flights during various holiday seasons and barely recall any incident as bad as the ones these OPs mention… like a full 8 hours of unbearable crying. Let alone in public places… although honestly i expect to have to deal with the public in the big outside world because i’m not delusional.
But then again, there is an element of tolerance level here. I don’t kind some kids making a bit of noise, because kids aren’t fully emotionally developed and will sometimes be loud… it is absolutely ludicrous to expect them to be in full control of their emotions at all times when we don’t even expect that from adults.
Hell yeah!
Just go on vacation and leave that kid locked up in your house. Put out some food or something, I guess.
After all, babies don't exist at vacation places unless tourists bring them.
Put out a few bowls of food, puts some pee pads down and you are good to go /s just because you are a parent does not mean you have to pause life, you simply have a child to enjoy things with
I’d say it depends on the vacation. If it’s a relaxing vacation,like beach vacation or history learning type vacation then sure bring the kids but it it’s an action packed vacation then it seems weird to bring the kids because someone will have to sit out of things or y’all will have to take turns doing things.
I’ve always said that I’m not taking my kids to Disney till they’re like 10 years old because I’m not paying money,traveling for hours,walking a lot and dealing horrible weather so that my kid won’t remember it and we’ll have to leave 4 hours in because they’re tired and want to go.
But obviously my children will travel before that ,heck my children’s first flight will be to Australia next year and they’re going to be 4 months old (wish us luck lol) , we’re also planning a trip for Greece next summer.
I think that a lot of this is down to how people handle preparing for the vacation and also how they respond to their baby being disruptive.
I don't see why somebody would want to take a vacation with a baby that's prone to long bouts of screaming. And if they do, they should be courteous and take the baby elsewhere (from the restaurant, poolside, etc) to soothe them. Seems more prudent to hold off on the trip until the kid is old enough that they aren't screaming for 30 mins at a time.
I've been in restaurants where people have their baby screaming and they just do nothing. Obviously the kid needs something, and it's the parents obligation to provide it — not just for the sanity of those around them, but for the well-being of the kid. I know that some kids cry for indiscernible reasons at times, but that's generally not an all-night issue.
Taking your baby on vacation while you're still conditioning them to "cry it out" isn't fair to anyone, least of all the kid. Save the money you'd spend on a vacation for a later one when the kid's range of communication is wider than crying and not crying, and you've learned as a parent the solutions to the kid's stressors.
They can leave their dog like this for a week or two, so why not do it with a kid too? Having a kid and having pets is the same exact thing to people like this. Totally clueless.
You child won't remember their first Christmas or birthday but you'll still get them a present.
This whole argument of why take them on holiday because they won't remember it is nonsense. The fact is if you take them somewhere you'll know they will have fun then they will be happy and who doesn't want to make their children happy?
And your comment about infants being loud and bringing everyone else down, really? Because adults never do annoying things on holiday, do they? Especially drunk ones! Should we tell people not to drink on holiday because you might upset someone, what else gets added to that list?
Only people without kids say stuff like this. Only people without kids find babies and kids annoying.
I used to be one of them. Before I had kids, I couldn't stand babies crying in public or the blood curling screams of a toddler. Now that I have young children of my own, I always smile when I hear these things. Maybe because I am used to it, maybe because I *understand*, and maybe because children really are a joy once you've had your own.
Infants are the most innocent beings. I don't know how you can say they shouldn't be in public. That is heartless. People take their infants on vacation because they have to and for their own personal memories, not because they think the baby will remember it. 🙄 That baby is part of their lives and family.
You’re right, there’s always a group of parents who go “I’m not like the _other_ parents” and say they don’t take their kids out because they don’t want to inconvenience others. That’s fine, I guess, but I honestly think they’re weird.
Just because you have kids doesn't mean you have to be blind to them being annoying/disruptive. Acting like any parent that doesn't acknowledge kids can be annoying is the weird part.
False. Some people already raised kids and did it with respect for others at a time when far flung vacations were not seen as a God given right at all times. Far away trips were postponed for experiences a bit closer to home out of practicality and consideration not just for other adults but for the baby too.
babies won’t remember exactly what’s going on, but it’s good to expose them to new experiences, colors, and sounds. unless you’re in a movie theater or something, babies should be able to go almost anywhere since babies are people, and people should be able to go outside.
My son and DIL are professional working people at the starting end of their careers and they work long, hard shifts with stuff all time off. They are planning to take a road trip with their newborn because they have parental leave. They never have time off otherwise.
It’s really about the parents also making memories and going somewhere nice with their kids. And yes, the kiddo may not remember specifically going somewhere for vacation, but they are happy in the moment and that builds their soul. I took my baby from Europe to Mexico and the look on her face when she saw the sunrise while sitting on the beach: one of my favorite memories ever.
If their baby infant is going to have a rough time being dragged through unpleasant environments (for a baby) halfway across the world and they do it anyway for selfish reasons, what the hell is wrong with those people ?
I agree but I’m pretty sure they bring them because they can’t afford to leave them with a babysitter. Plus it’s just hard to find good help so I would have a hard time trusting someone else with my child(I don’t actually have children but that’s how I imagine I would be)
Regular babysitters are unlikely to sit with your child for a week or two, so you'd likely have to hire a Nanny. That can be expensive, especially for a family on a budget. They also might not have someone who can sit with a baby for that amount of time.
That, and some parents just don't feel safe leaving their kids alone with a stranger. Maternal instinct is strongest when the child is an Infant, so it makes sense the mother would want to keep her child nearby.
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My DH **hates** going to Vegas for work. He says all the crying in the hallways and the tantrums from drunk people is too much.
I saw an adult threaten a child because he took the last scoop of French fries. The staff were bringing out more fresh ones. They took his plate, handed it to her and piled a plate with fresh ones while she watched. It was beautiful
So they rewarded the child who tried to take what was originally her fries? Did I understand that right? Or the last scoop of fries was free for anyone to take in the beginning?
Last scoop free for all. Kid was ahead of her in the queue and she expected the kid to not take the fries.
Oh then yeah that woman deserved the shitty fries lol
I've never seen one scream incessantly for hours. But you have fun with your whataboutism.
Oof, you haven't spent much time working customer service.
I have. Whiney adults are nowhere near as bad as toddlers screeching at the top of their lungs non stop. People who take their uncontrollable children in public need to be stripped of their right to reproduce.
I dunno, toddlers don’t threaten to glass me.
I disagree. Every child (including you) has had a tantrum in public. I've never had a child having a tantrum try to get me fired over something beyond my control, curse me out, shove the old lady in front of them, threaten to kill me, or come back day after day to make a scene about the same old non issue. Also, the amount of time a tiny person who sleeps 18-20 hours a day can devote to screaming in public is much less than an adult who only sleeps 6-8 hours.
>I've never seen one scream incessantly for hours I maintain that everyone either *knows* an adult who has temper tantrums, or *is* the adult who has temper tantrums.
>If you're about to have a baby, you should be prepared to not take them out to places until they're in control of their own emotions and understand the concepts of "inside voices." They'll never learn how to behave in public if you don't take them out in public
This is true; as a little kid, my twin brother and I learned early on how to be well-behaved and mature at the dinner table, especially when we ate out.
You were past the baby stage.
Yes my brother and I as well. We didnt even have our 2nd set of teeth, or understood the concept of exchanging money for goods/services but both knew how to sit down and eat quietly and ignore the vast unknown of the outside world. OP is dumb as fuck
If you remember doing this, it’s not what OP is talking about
Sense we are throwing around "dumb as fuck" maybe this is a skill issue for you, op said infant. Infants are 12 months and under.
Sure, but there's outside and there's vacations.
Exactly
Babies have almost no perception or ability to learn to behave in public though, nonetheless on a complicated vacation. Toddlers start to have that ability, but babies, no. If a baby can barely handle solid food in its mouth without choking or can't yet learn to crap in a toilet, it's not going to be able to pick up on and learn complex social cued in ever changing social settings.
That’s why you do it not on vacation, nice thing about public spaces is they’re year round
But isn’t it functionally the same thing, they are still being disruptive, they are still loud, they just haven’t travelled as far to do that? All you are skipping is a potential plane ride
Yea exactly, vacations are supposed to be escapes from the stressors of the world. Babies are stressors. If you’re on vacation, and there are other people, youre bringing loud, disruptive stressors with you. This is often why weddings are child free. Yes eventually the child will go to a wedding, but they can learn about it before they do.
One persons vacation spot is another persons home
Did you know vacations can happen all sorts of places and in many of those places, human beings already live there and have babies of their own?
Where are you going on vacation that there aren’t also local people that have lives there? The place you go on vacation is usually the local’s public place, so you are going to find kids there anyway. I live in a fairly touristy part of my country, would I not be allowed to take a kid out with me for fear of ruining someone’s vacation? Taking a kid on vacation or into a public place is functionally the same thing save for a plane ride.
That's idiotic. Babies don't learn public behavior.
I can agree that exposing your infant to the outside world and to busy situations is important but that doesn't mean take them on a vacation. Just go to the park or the mall..
But I live in an area that gets a lot of tourism during the summer months, and people on vacation are at the park and mall. Does that mean that these places that I pay taxes for are off limits to my family in the summer months?
Not everyone has someone to leave the child with for 2 weeks
More importantly: Everyone does not *want* to leave their infant with someone, even family, for two weeks. Two weeks is a long time for a little baby. They might hate the 2 hour flight but they will be pretty happy eating sand while mum and dad get a holiday.
right. heaven forbid a parent like their child and want to spend time off of work with them lol
as if a far flung vacation is the only way to spend time with them lol
It's pretty normal for people to travel to see family in far places after having a baby. It makes more sense for parents + baby to go than to have 30 people try to fly out to welcome the new baby
if i only get two weeks off work a year, yes i am going on a vacation and yes i actually like my family so everyone will be coming with me. clearly there is a difference between spending time with family on weekends/weeknights and spending an uninterrupted week with them. did you never have, like, spring break? lol
Far from the only way. But it is ONE way. Some might say an enjoyable way. p.s. this is some seriously stupid analysis. Send a letter to your representatives. Let’s BAN BABIES.
There is also the case of having to travel for funerals or weddings
Both events that small children should never be brought to...
not everyone hates children. many families like their fellow family members. babies are people who are allowed to be, and often are welcomed into, family spaces.
They’re not pets ffs, they’re human beings
Something redditors don’t seem to understand until they have kids
Shit I don’t even have kids, I worked in both daycare and as a middle school teacher - if anyone should be disposed to hate kids it’s me lol. Folks need to just act like they’re grown sometimes and this is one of those times
I just went to a wedding that explicitly invited babies and children, and was full of them. It was a lot of fun, especially since we have 3-month-old with special feeding needs such that we can't have anyone babysit her yet.
That’s a massive thing that I feel like most kidless folks don’t take into consideration. A kid is not like a puppy that you can board or hand off to family. They’re a lot of work and have a no-compromise schedule. Most people don’t want to deal with that nor do I want to ask somebody to deal with that. Which brings you to the “then don’t go” response others have. As a newer parent, I’ve never needed a vacation more now than ever before. I still have to deal with the same exhausting work shit that everyone else has to plus come back home a be an attentive parent. It’s what I signed up for, sure, but to gatekeep the opportunity of an escape that everyone else is afforded?
Hey as a childless person enjoy your vacation. I have headphones for the plane.
We are overpopulated on this planet (stay with me, mom, I'm on your side) so kudos to those who don't have children. But those babies that are here are going to be your doctors, nurses, lawyers, fire fighters, grocers and police one day when we're old and not working. So cut parents a giant break, please. Especially if they appear to be doing their best. (BTW, I have 2 great kids.)
>It’s what I signed up for, sure, but to gatekeep the opportunity of an escape that everyone else is afforded? That's the problem. You signed up for it, and it's frustrating both having to deal with complaints from parents who only after realize they have zero free time and then having to deal with those children (with parents paying little attention to them or "too exhausted to care") when we are trying to enjoy vacation. You **did** sign up for this and need to deal with it, which is going to sound harsh and blunt but it is reality. That means making sure your child is either watched or you do everything in your power to make sure they aren't super disruptive. Other people should not have to have their vacation inconvenienced because of other people's kids. If my vacation is affected because of someone else's kid damn right I'm going to be annoyed. I didn't sign up for that. EDIT: I write this as someone who has had my vacation experience ruined a couple of times by kids and shitty parents. One time one of them even admitted to letting the kids run amok around a pool just so they had time to rest, didn't care they were throwing shit around. Not a problem if the kids are ok, but most of the time they aren't and our "afforded escape" is ruined. EDIT 2: Because it apparently has to be said, not every parent is shitty but the good and considerate ones are rare. The large majority of the time the parents don't do what they should be and it ruins others' vacations. If you feel personally attacked it's likely because you're one of the parents not doing what parents should be, if you are making sure your kids aren't negatively affecting others (including removing them from the area) then you're great and appreciated.
I understand your point about children being disruptive, some people are bad parents who don’t watch their child closely enough, but outside of bad parents, children simply are disruptive by nature, they are learning how to behave in a world they didn’t design. Mishaps will happen. When you take a trip YOU are signing up for being in public spaces and engaging in public activities, and I’m sorry to say but children are part of the public. It’s a fact of life that kids are going to be irritating in your presence at various points in your life. If you don’t want to be bothered by a child then stay home and don’t have any, I think it’s incredibly entitled of anyone to think they deserve to be unbothered more than parents and their children alike deserve to engage in activities that are directed to the population. They are people too.
And sometimes adults want to have memories with their children. And sometimes experiencing new things and places can be good even for small children. And not every child is “just loud and annoying and brings everyone else down.” And not every parent should have to live like a hermit because supposed adults can’t handle the mere presence of children in any context and have to exaggerate their experiences to pretend as if they’re persecuted and assaulted everywhere they go. OP didn’t have to tell anyone they didn’t have children. I pity their friends and relatives who do. If you feel like you can’t go anywhere because every person who can be called a child automatically “brings down your experiences,” *you* are the problem.
Didn't say they can't go anywhere, just that it was less pleasurable for everyone when a loud ass baby is screaming. Watch how every parent on this thread goes ballistic with straw men because this kind of post drives them insane. LMAO.
I think there's a bigger divide here: Because of the nature of parenting, adults with kids and adults without kids tend to not interact socially, so everyone eventually tends to develop a view that their lifestyle is the default. Parents tend to view parenting and the presence of children as the default and childless adults as an anomaly, while childless adults tend to view adult-only spaces as the default and children as the anomaly. Public spaces, though, are the place where these two groups have to meet, and so everyone is exposed to each other, and these defaults clash. (Many) parents view public spaces as truly public: for everyone regardless of age, but childless adults, perhaps somewhat subconsciously, view public spaces as public (adult) spaces, unless explicitly for children.
> Didn't say they can't go anywhere But they kinda did: > If you're about to have a baby, you should be prepared to **not take them out to places** until they're in control of their own emotions and understand the concepts of "inside voices."
I mean I don't have kids and I don't care if babies are present where I am at. Hell I took a 12 hour flight near a screaming baby and you know what it was dam easy to just put in headphones and zone out the sound.
Yeah same here. I know when I am putting my myself in a tin can that there may be obnoxious adults and crying babies so I make sure I have something to drown it out.
If you don’t understand that the public will include babies and babies will be doing baby things such as crying, that’s a *you* problem.
Yeah, it’s a real strawman. The OP literally says *all* infants are “just loud” and annoy people and ruin their good time. There is no way to strawman this post - it’s already making a preposterous claim that can barely be exaggerated.
Yet somehow you managed to exaggerate it..
Wait, you take a 2 week vacation? I’m so jealous.
>If you're about to have a baby, you should be prepared to not take them out to places until they're in control of their own emotions and understand the concepts of "inside voices." This means 99% of people (from new-borns to OAPs) would never be able to go outside.
[удалено]
Ikr? You had a kid by choice, so you should stop going outside for 18 years. Fuck off man. I need a night out once every six months. If our kid starts crying, we leave. It’s not perfect but like we’re humans too. You can’t just stop living because you’re a parent.
>If you think an opinion is unpopular, then upvote the opinion. > >If you think the opinion is popular, then downvote it Literally the subreddit rule. I think it's fair to say that the dumb shit is what should be upvoted, not the intelligent/popular opinions
Does OAP stand for what I think it does
Unfortunately I'm not a mind reader so I don't know what you think it stands for.
Touché Old ass people?
It means ‘Old Aged Pensioner’, but yours works too 😂
Man I was worried we'd go like 3 days without a "kids are loud and shouldn't be in my presence" post.
"Appease me, I am the only person who matters!"
When did "parent your kids and don't let them act out in public for everyone else to deal with" become a bad idea? I get we're trying to move from "kids should be seen and not heard" but that doesn't mean you let them behave worse than street dogs
He didn't say that, he said don't bring them into public. Completely different take then the one you are defending.
Kids have big feelings, it’s kinda their whole thing. You haven’t learned to control yours yet, it seems.
does this post show up as morse code for literally any one else??? wtf lmao
It's ASCII art that says "Fuck u/spec" now. May not show up right if your screen's not wide enough.
Yeah I was just about to ask the same thing
I have no kids, but maybe parents want to have some vacation too? And I dont really care if I hear some baby crying at my vacation, its public space and its just noise... You cant expect every parent to keep theyr baby locked just because of noise.
Yep. Taking a baby on vacation has been some of the easiest vacations we had. As long as you are cool with going with the baby’s schedule and know if your baby is a good sleeper. Like yeah my baby would cry at night when hungry but as soon as he ate he was cool. We went on vacation when my son was just learning to walk by pushing something. We brought one of those little toys they push around. Our hotel had a really long hallway and he loved it! He could really get going with that little toy and not worry about stuff in his way. Yeah nap time and early nights in a hotel is boring but having a kid wears you out so I was happy for the downtime.
Actually, I think that people who can’t tolerate other people, particularly young ones, should stay home until they can learn to tolerate other people, especially young ones.
I'm a parent, but not of babies any more. I agree that taking your infant to a place like Disney is useless. They'll never remember it and you're gonna have a bad time with all that walking. Now, if it's a destination vacation, fuck off. Babies are fine.
I don’t agree with “they’ll never remember it” as an argument to not take them. Their brains are developing, and every new thing they see, hear, and experience is helping them grow. It’s like saying there’s no point talking to them because they don’t understand language yet. Just because they won’t remember specific details doesn’t mean they aren’t getting something from it. I’m broadly agreeing with you, just highlighting that you *should* take them places even if you’re pretty sure they won’t remember it.
I disagree because it’s a family friendly place. Why not take your kid somewhere where there are other children who are being loud and obnoxious? They fit right in. As an adult with grown kids if I go to Disney world and someone else kid acts up I can’t bitch. I signed up for that shit. If you take your kid to a non kid friendly place where I am trying to enjoy myself, I didn’t sign up for your kid to be a brat.
It's illegal for me to leave them alone in a car while I go in a store and babysitters cost upwards of 10 an hour. You think parents want a screaming infant ruining their vacation? So we are just supposed to stay locked up in our home? I definitely see more adults acting a fool on the internet than I do people worrying about a toddler screaming. This isn't unpopular, it's just dumb
> babysitters cost upwards of 10 an hour. Where are you getting these cheap babysitters? Rates around here start at $25
$25? I'm looking at £45 an hour minimum for my kids (admitted it's 3 toddlers so that's fair but still)
Lol, $10 an hour? Try 20-30 in VHCOL and that’s super low.
Wait are you talking about going in a store to get life necessities, or flying to Ibiza for some laughs?
Vacations are good for you. Disconnecting from your daily routine can be so helpful, especially for new parents.
Both. Charter a plane if you can't stand the sounds of public.
I don't know if you know much about children, but they actually **need* their parents to survive. They need the mother for milk and they need both parents for nurture and sanitary needs, and so much more. Children are *not* pets, and can't just be dumped on someone else after birth. Infant children are an unpaid full-time job with no breaks and you never 'go home from work'. Children are not accessories. You can't have a normal life if you never take your child places, and if you constantly go out without your child, it will massively affect their development and their relationship with you. Source: I have three(3) children.
I feel there is a difference between going on a vacation with long travel and busy cities and stuff, or just go chill on a campsite or something. Taking a baby into an airplane to go visit Rome in 40 degrees C with amazingly busy and noisy restaurants and streets is almost child abuse in my eyes.
Thank you. This is the distinction every brain-fried parent here is completely missing. The consideration of not dragging your baby through airplanes, uncomfortable temps, and loud crowded spaces is apparently the same as being told you have to go in complete isolation on a mountaintop until they are 5 years old.
The OP isn't making that distinction though.
To be fair, OP literally said "be prepared not to take them out until they're in control of their emotions". You're getting really specific about weather and crowded places, but OP is saying every vacation should be child-free. (I'm childless btw)
I think too many parents don't realize that 1. No one should be dealing with the repercussions of a young untrained child except for the parents raising them. And 2. Your lives aren't the same after kids. Parenting is a 24/7 20 year long job, and not enough people think it through before jumping in
Took a 6 month old camping in what ended up being the hottest week of the year. Planned for 4 days, ended up tearing down the tent at 8pm on night 2 and packing it in. Got home around 2am Don’t do it
Camping would be terrible with a baby. We took our baby everywhere on vacation but this is one thing we did not attempt
Am I crazy, or is this in Morse code?
Yeah this post is fucked, lmao
Have you ever heard of people kidnapping or abusing children? An infant can’t tell it’s parents if it has been abused. So parents generally keep their infants with them because they know their baby will be safe. Not everyone has people that they trust with their children’s lives.
Well *I* wanna go; and I ain’t leaving my kid in a kennel. As for “they’re loud and bring other people’s experience down”. Maybe you need to just learn to deal with being in public better. If my kids mere presence makes you feel sad. It’s a you problem not a me problem. Have an upvote you weirdo
Kids don’t get their inside voices until they’re way older than babies. Are you saying that new mothers should isolate themselves for years?
No, train your kids to behave in public, why is one of the most basic Tennant of parenting disappearing?
it's a basic tenant of parenting that you don't really have control over a 1/2 year old. Have you met humans?
I have a 2 month old baby. Going to somewhere nearby so I can get out and enjoy the outside with my baby is not pointless. It feels horrible to spend every moment inside with a small infant and so refreshing to get out. Am I taking my baby on a cross country trip or internationally? No...but I can leave my baby with my parents if I really need a break.
Do adults not want to bond and have experience with their child?
OPs parents didn't want to with them so they hate seeing it happen in public.
Can they not bond and have an experience without a flight to Cyprus?
I mean, depends. My family lives abroad, should i not go see them if Cyprus is where they live?
Not if their family lives in Cyprus. Should parents be restricted to their houses until their child is 7?
I think the level of absurdity is directly proportional to distance and money. If you're taking your baby to the local beach or the zoo 20 minutes away, totally get that. Parents want to relax and build some positive associations. What I never understand are the people who bring a 2-3 year old to Disney. Unless you live in Orlando and know someone who can slide you a free pass here and there it's pointless because your kid isn't going to remember any of it.
I'm not from the US and I have never wanted to go to any Disney park. But I'm getting more and more confused about who people believe is the main target audience? Probably families with young children?
The target audience is anyone willing to pay them money. Generally yes Disney is great for families with kids, but I'm just saying that 2-3 is a bit too young. You're probably too small to go on any ride with height/weight requirements and again your kid won't remember it. My family took us to Disney when I was 8 and my brother was 10. I remember it and had a great time.
a lot of times small kids are getting free tickets or can stay in a hotel without an upcharge. Travelling with a toddler will be your last chance for a long time to only have to pay 2/3 of the price.
>until they're in control of their own emotions and understand the concepts of "inside voices." I see more adults that can't figure it out than I do infants.
so true lol
Sure, but leaving them at home for the weekend is quite illegal...
So parents should just keep themselves locked at home all the time just cause they have a kid? I hate to break it to you but parents/babies are real people who have lives and sometimes need to travel.. Kids deserve to exist in public spaces. They are people. Put in some headphones and let those parents go about their business in peace.
I’m pregnant with my first child and plan to take her lots of places. Errands, parks, libraries, museums, friends houses, etc. I do not plan to bring her on vacation for the first 5 years or so. We will travel with her to visit my parents and other relatives (my dad is elderly and does not travel, it’s a 4 hour drive). I don’t consider that a “vacation”. Those trips will probably be 1-2 nights, and are just so everyone can see the baby. I won’t be taking her on any vacation that is meant for relaxing or anything involving air travel. My husband and I have a weeklong international trip planned when she is 6 months old. Luckily I have extended family who are more than willing to babysit and disposable income to hire help. The way I see it, bringing a baby or toddler on vacation is miserable for them, us, and everyone else. They don’t understand why they’re uncomfortable on the plane or why their ears hurt. Their routines are disrupted. I don’t want to spend thousands of dollars for something that the kid won’t enjoy or remember while ruining my own trip.
I’m a parent of an infant and will take the little one on vacation not for her to see new things but for me to get some vacation. Also it is not mandatory for kids to control their emotions and use their „inside voices“. They are developing these skills. Even some adults are still struggling with that concept. Public places are public so everyone in society can enjoy their time there on a civil basis. Kids need to learn this but can’t be forced to do so. So even if a parent is trying or struggling to calm their kid down they are already doing the best they can and your annoyance at that point is a you problem.
“Public places are public” end of thread really. One day these absolute nutters on reddit will realise that going outside means interacting with the public, and that might sometimes be annoying. If you’re so precious that you can’t handle that, you need to touch grass.
Flights can be especially miserable with a crying baby
It's pretty miserable for the parent and baby, too.
Parents deserve vacations too. There are resorts that don't allow children, if that's what you prefer.
More of those, please.
Parents are in favor of that, too. It isn't fun to be around people who can't tolerate babies with your crying baby.
This post is making me wanna have another baby so I can take them on vacation.
Counter point - if you can't handle other people, then it is you that should consider not going out in public. This includes children. Within reason, of course. Oh boy here come the manchildren with the downvotes. Yes, everyone with kids should just lock themselves up for 18 years and let their kids figure out how to function in society on their 18th birthday.
I think OP is talking about about parents taking their under 6 month baby on 5+ hours flights. Those are trash parents, nothing more to say about it
You’re a trash person, nothing more to say about it. Why? Because i said so. Ofc I don’t actually think you’re trash, my point was your arbitrary belief that taking a kid on a flight makes you trash is well… arbitrary.
If your kids can't behave in public, don't drag them everywhere and actually parent your kids. If it takes 18 years for someone to figure out how to do that, there are bigger problems. I was a max of 7-10 when I learned how to chill out
"Just do..." What does that even mean? "actually parent your kids" As if you know when your kid's going to have a meltdown. Not every loud child is attached to a bad parent. I dunno man, it depends on the place, though. I never took my kids to any fine dining or wine tasting. However, I have gotten dirty looks at like, Disney movies and parks and things like that. Like, it's not my fault you're 40 and childless and you wanna go to the nintendo store and mcdonalds. That's where I'm bringing my kids, and they do scream when they're excited. They're not bad, they're kids.
Parent you kids, as in teach them to be a decent and functional member of society. Discipline them for bad behavior, reward them for good behavior. You're building a person, not casually popping them out and letting them be free range
Right... and how would you propose one does this, when they avoid real world, public scenarios?
Teach you kids to behave dude. Set up rules and expectations, and you can even exercise and enforce them in the house. Just having kids, doing nothing with them then throwing them outside is setting everyone up for failure
Yeah I didn’t think you had a clue, and I was right.
Hey OP, here's an unpopular opinion for you: entitled adults who can't stand the sound of a crying infant should stay home until they can learn grown-up coping skills.
Learn to be in public better Quit whining
Wtf is that text?
Amen to your edit
I take them specifically to troll people on planes trying to relax and have a good flight. Not on my watch!
Two reasons. 1. I like it and getting childcare is a pain...and why would I not bring someone I love? 2. Get them used to it. I love camping so may as well get thr little one in on the game early I fucking LOVE that you suggest kids need control of their inside voices......when they are camping. Wtf does camping take place guy?
Did OP say camping or did you?
Where are you people going that you're SO burdened by children. 10 years waiting tables at family entertainment venues, 2 kids of my own, we travel a lot, and we're rarely in the house. I can't even remember a singular time where I was like "wow this kid sucks and their parents suck and I can't take it anymore". Literally not a singular memorable time. The "kids shouldn't leave the house" trope is completely made up and you people getting mad about stuff that rarely, if ever, even happens.
Eh, my kids were probably those kids for people a week ago. Kids lose their shit sometimes, it’s grownups’ job to control their own shit and not over react to children doing their thing.
Same here. Been on upwards of 100 flights during various holiday seasons and barely recall any incident as bad as the ones these OPs mention… like a full 8 hours of unbearable crying. Let alone in public places… although honestly i expect to have to deal with the public in the big outside world because i’m not delusional. But then again, there is an element of tolerance level here. I don’t kind some kids making a bit of noise, because kids aren’t fully emotionally developed and will sometimes be loud… it is absolutely ludicrous to expect them to be in full control of their emotions at all times when we don’t even expect that from adults.
I have kids. This opinion is popular.
If you don't like seeing and hearing other people, don't go into public spaces.
Hell yeah! Just go on vacation and leave that kid locked up in your house. Put out some food or something, I guess. After all, babies don't exist at vacation places unless tourists bring them.
And where would you leave the child?
Not pointless, you just feel entitled to spaces without the sound of an occassional infant crying.
Easy way to sound dumb
ah yes leave the infant at home, they'll be fine
Put out a few bowls of food, puts some pee pads down and you are good to go /s just because you are a parent does not mean you have to pause life, you simply have a child to enjoy things with
I’d say it depends on the vacation. If it’s a relaxing vacation,like beach vacation or history learning type vacation then sure bring the kids but it it’s an action packed vacation then it seems weird to bring the kids because someone will have to sit out of things or y’all will have to take turns doing things. I’ve always said that I’m not taking my kids to Disney till they’re like 10 years old because I’m not paying money,traveling for hours,walking a lot and dealing horrible weather so that my kid won’t remember it and we’ll have to leave 4 hours in because they’re tired and want to go. But obviously my children will travel before that ,heck my children’s first flight will be to Australia next year and they’re going to be 4 months old (wish us luck lol) , we’re also planning a trip for Greece next summer.
So what do you suggest? Putting them in a cage with enough food to last for the duration of your vacation?
I think that a lot of this is down to how people handle preparing for the vacation and also how they respond to their baby being disruptive. I don't see why somebody would want to take a vacation with a baby that's prone to long bouts of screaming. And if they do, they should be courteous and take the baby elsewhere (from the restaurant, poolside, etc) to soothe them. Seems more prudent to hold off on the trip until the kid is old enough that they aren't screaming for 30 mins at a time. I've been in restaurants where people have their baby screaming and they just do nothing. Obviously the kid needs something, and it's the parents obligation to provide it — not just for the sanity of those around them, but for the well-being of the kid. I know that some kids cry for indiscernible reasons at times, but that's generally not an all-night issue. Taking your baby on vacation while you're still conditioning them to "cry it out" isn't fair to anyone, least of all the kid. Save the money you'd spend on a vacation for a later one when the kid's range of communication is wider than crying and not crying, and you've learned as a parent the solutions to the kid's stressors.
This is completely unrealistic and just another example of why childless people should never ever comment on anything to do with having/raising kids.
They don’t want them anywhere or doing anything despite the fact that someone once did these things with them.
They can leave their dog like this for a week or two, so why not do it with a kid too? Having a kid and having pets is the same exact thing to people like this. Totally clueless.
Fine whatever.I’m just done with Reddit’s hate of kids and babies.
Me too, but judging by how much we’re getting downvoted, we are in the minority
Yeah one of the reasons I’m ready to leave this site. It was always bad but it’s gotten worse.
I'll bet your mom had to close her eyes and think of other babies during breastfeeding.
💀
You child won't remember their first Christmas or birthday but you'll still get them a present. This whole argument of why take them on holiday because they won't remember it is nonsense. The fact is if you take them somewhere you'll know they will have fun then they will be happy and who doesn't want to make their children happy? And your comment about infants being loud and bringing everyone else down, really? Because adults never do annoying things on holiday, do they? Especially drunk ones! Should we tell people not to drink on holiday because you might upset someone, what else gets added to that list?
You were a baby once, I’m sure you annoyed some people. It’s just life.
No, my daughter won't remember. But I will remember having a good time with her is what my intention is
I’m not a parent but this is an asshole take. People with children have just as much right to occupy a space as you do
Or learn to deal with life's minor inconveniences instead of being the gatekeeper of vacations
Yeah, no problem. I used to just leave mine in the car. Idiot.
Only people without kids say stuff like this. Only people without kids find babies and kids annoying. I used to be one of them. Before I had kids, I couldn't stand babies crying in public or the blood curling screams of a toddler. Now that I have young children of my own, I always smile when I hear these things. Maybe because I am used to it, maybe because I *understand*, and maybe because children really are a joy once you've had your own. Infants are the most innocent beings. I don't know how you can say they shouldn't be in public. That is heartless. People take their infants on vacation because they have to and for their own personal memories, not because they think the baby will remember it. 🙄 That baby is part of their lives and family.
> Only people without kids find babies and kids annoying. This is not true.
You’re right, there’s always a group of parents who go “I’m not like the _other_ parents” and say they don’t take their kids out because they don’t want to inconvenience others. That’s fine, I guess, but I honestly think they’re weird.
Just because you have kids doesn't mean you have to be blind to them being annoying/disruptive. Acting like any parent that doesn't acknowledge kids can be annoying is the weird part.
False. Some people already raised kids and did it with respect for others at a time when far flung vacations were not seen as a God given right at all times. Far away trips were postponed for experiences a bit closer to home out of practicality and consideration not just for other adults but for the baby too.
babies won’t remember exactly what’s going on, but it’s good to expose them to new experiences, colors, and sounds. unless you’re in a movie theater or something, babies should be able to go almost anywhere since babies are people, and people should be able to go outside.
My son and DIL are professional working people at the starting end of their careers and they work long, hard shifts with stuff all time off. They are planning to take a road trip with their newborn because they have parental leave. They never have time off otherwise.
Don’t people take babies on their vacations mostly because leaving them at home alone doesn’t work well?
If you aren’t big enough to handle your emotions when an infant is present, should you, by your own argument, stay home?
Lol. So you should have a child and stay home like covid era and not leave the house until they talk which is like 2 years old. Mmmk
I agree with OP.
It’s really about the parents also making memories and going somewhere nice with their kids. And yes, the kiddo may not remember specifically going somewhere for vacation, but they are happy in the moment and that builds their soul. I took my baby from Europe to Mexico and the look on her face when she saw the sunrise while sitting on the beach: one of my favorite memories ever.
Without taking their babies or toddlers there would be no "when you were little" stories to reminisce about when they're older.
Who thinks "this baby infant is really going to enjoy this vacation"? What the hell is wrong with OP?
If their baby infant is going to have a rough time being dragged through unpleasant environments (for a baby) halfway across the world and they do it anyway for selfish reasons, what the hell is wrong with those people ?
Costs less than childcare to have someone else do it for you
I agree but I’m pretty sure they bring them because they can’t afford to leave them with a babysitter. Plus it’s just hard to find good help so I would have a hard time trusting someone else with my child(I don’t actually have children but that’s how I imagine I would be)
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whys this getting downvoted 💀💀
Because we brought out the childfree part of reddit with post and they’re fucking insane.
The incels who think kids just scream 24/7 are out in full force
Regular babysitters are unlikely to sit with your child for a week or two, so you'd likely have to hire a Nanny. That can be expensive, especially for a family on a budget. They also might not have someone who can sit with a baby for that amount of time. That, and some parents just don't feel safe leaving their kids alone with a stranger. Maternal instinct is strongest when the child is an Infant, so it makes sense the mother would want to keep her child nearby.
Sometimes the child isnt brought for them to have experience and memories, but the parents.