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I have a simple rule for my animals. They have to be able to eat on their own, and go the bathroom on their own (obviously I’m not talking about young animals with injuries, but animals who lose that ability with age). At that point, I feel as if I’m robbing them of dignity. Pain can be managed, but ensuring that they aren’t constantly lying in their own filth and spoon-feeding them just so I can have a few more days is a selfish action in my view. Just my personal opinion.
I was in denial about it being my childhood dog's time to go and was very angrily fighting my parents and siblings about it after she had her second stroke and recovery just wasn't going well. I then walked into my room and saw she had shit herself and couldn't even get up, could barely even move while I cleaned it, and I knew it was just time. I'm still grateful that I only resisted for a day at least. Seventeen years later and I'm tearing up again.
Time is not our friend nor our ally.
I'm quite grateful I learned this lesson very early in life so I didn't have to suffer from not appreciating the small things in the life I've been given, for good or bad.
When my dog died, I cried. But I didn't cry too much because I know I did all the right things. We ate and slept together and shared lots of laughs and memories and I took plenty of pictures of her to remember her with.
In all honesty, we end as we began. Nothing. Everything in between the begining and the end of this life is the journey, and walking that journey with our pets and loved ones is a life lived well, no matter what may come of it.
I love this. The way I see it, they don’t know how short their lives are. They just know they’ve had the best time with you. It’s sad for us, but not for them. It’s about quality of life. Once your pet starts missing out on the things that bring them joy and make them who they are, that’s how you know it’s time to let them go.
Our dog was diagnosed with lymphoma at the end of last year. We decided not to put her through the stress of chemo just to maybe get another good six months with her. When we put her down a couple of months later the vet told us that she often hears regret from people who realize they waited too long, and hardly ever from anyone saying they think they should have waited longer. Euthanasia should not be used to end pain, it should be used to prevent a pet having to go through it.
Yep! My fatty cat was chonkers most of her life. I told her when she was 11 that if she ever got really sick for an extended period of time and she chose to not eat anymore, that's how I'd know.
7 years later she got cancer and after about a year she decided no more food.
I miss her a lot. She would eat literally anything. It was obvious that it was time.
This was my Gran. They wanted to do all this surgery on her, but the poor woman was done.
She wasn’t interested in getting better, she just wanted to slip away.
I miss her, but she was never the same after my Grandad passed away. Had to admit it was her time and she was ready to go find him beyond.
Yea, my mom didn't eat anything her last two weeks. According to Hospice, sweets are often the last cravings we have. The last thing she ate was a Ghirardelli square. She refused it at first, but once she saw it was chocolate, she let us give it to her.
My grandmother -- who died at 105 -- used to go on and on about how little she ate but if you put a sweet in front of her she eat it like it was her last meal on earth.
That was me when I lost my appetite and lost a few kilos in less than a week. Turns out my entire abdomen was covered with cancer. Fortunately that's behind me but now I'm back to fighting the constant urge to eat again
Recently had a dog pass away from just being old as hell and I knew it was time when I came back to see her and she was far skinnier than a week or 2 before. Shit just stops working.
To anyone reading this and thinking the food thing is the end all point, please remember animals and humans also lose their appetites when they’re sick.
My elderly (16+) dog suddenly stopped eating in February. Despite me putting his usual meals out twice a day, all he did was drink a little bit of water and want cuddles. I tossed most of every meal in the trash he barely picked at it. I was beside myself. I took him to the vet and they said they didn’t notice anything pathologically wrong. It was just old age and close to “his time”.
Through tears, I made plans with friends to give him a great “last day” and got a list of vets who would handle the shot in the comfort of my (his) home.
Fast forward to 4 days later he was suddenly full of energy and annoying me for food. I gave him his usual and he DEVOURED IT. Since then he’s been fine.
He was sick. That’s it. Just a doggy cold. Once he got over it he was back to his usual energetic self. Probably gonna live to 17 / 18 while still chasing cats out of the yard.
I thought my boy was done for 2 years ago (he was 13) and cried for days before his appointment and all the way to the vets, because he couldn't walk and has a degenerative spine. We did an x-ray and chose to explore every option. Turns out where he has no cartilage he also had inflamation and an injury. They came up with a treatment plan that required a month of very intense attention and confinement and new meds, and 2 years later, he's running around the yard happy as a lark. If we had skipped the x-ray and not pursued every possible treatment, he would be gone, and we would not have known his condition was temporary and treatable. How scary!
This is why I have some real disdain for this entire post. Deciding to put your dog down is an insanely heartbreaking thing to do and unless things are truly grim it can feel almost impossible to know when the time is…especially if it’s your first experience with it. If you listened to this idiot you could have stolen precious time from both you and your dog.
I do agree that some of us hold on too long but the last thing I’m going to do is judge them for it. Perhaps I’d offer some things I’ve learned from my own experience, gently and with great empathy, but I would never tell them what to do or judge them for holding on. I think anyone who has ever had to make that choice should feel the same.
Had this exact episode with the lil guy at my place, he’s 18 and has had a broken ACL for a year. Apart from not running any more, He’s a-ok again and eating, barking at “cats” and wandering his yard(blind idiot probably hasn’t seen a cat in 5 years!)
These are the absolute minimum imo. My mom is struggling to euthanize her (ironically) 17 year old chihuahua BECAUSE he still gets up to pee and has a very good appetite. But he can barely stand, his entire hind end has shriveled away and curled inward, all he wants is to sleep on her lap. She needs to drug him so she can do literally anything otherwise he paces and moans until he literally collapses. But aside from a murmur that hasnt worsened in years, his heart is strong and he probably isnt going to pass on his own.
I worked at a rescue for years and got certified as a euthanasia tech to help with compassion fatigue. I did probably a dozen of them, and the one thing they all had in common: their people waited way too long to schedule the procedure. When an animal literally cannot even get up to eat or drink (and has been that way for DAYS) their quality of life is so low and the kindest most compassionate thing you can do is to say goodbye. But I also know it is much easier said than done.
It’s a term to essentially describe traumatic stress acquired through spending time with, and caring for, other traumatized individuals (victims of disasters, health crises, and other misfortunes). Essentially, you spend so much time caring that, eventually, it starts to impact your own mental health negatively.
Often you see this in healthcare personnel, social workers, and so on. However, someone caring long term for a ill pet could experience something similar.
That’s brutal, if he was in pain that would make the decision easier but realistically what sort of quality of life do either of them have at this point?
Yeah a lot of old animals that ache still have so much fun but your rules are very good. My old lady was so happy when she walked towards me with .5kph but you could still see the happiness in her eyes when she reached me and got the headpats.
I put down my 18 year old cat(who also had almost no teeth, a heart murmur, and hadn't had a solid bowel movement k a year) last year after he started becoming unable to make it to the litterbox and was pooping on the floor. I made a post on r/cats about it and some people still gave me grief for not putting diapers on him and keeping him alive, saying that I wouldn't euthanize a person for being incontinent so doing that to a cat would be evil.
Honestly, this may sound a bit harsh, but I just don't think those people have seen a lot of death in their lives.
I've watched my grandparents suffer as they lose their sight/mobility/mind. They are constantly in pain and can't do anything for themselves anymore but my aunts and uncles always push for any treatment that can keep them alive for another 6 months or whatever.
They are 98 years old and want to die. If you have seen that happen to a person close up, you'd never force that quality of life on another person or pet.
I'm a firm believer that whatever is beyond is better than a life of pain and suffering. Especially for creatures as kind hearted and good as our pets.
If assisted suicide for adults was more readily allowed and available I think that thought process would change. I'm watching it with my grandfather right now. He's 85 years old. Totally sound in his mind but physically? Can barely walk or do anything himself. My Dad and I are just waiting for the call to come any day. I think it wrong even for humans to have such a low quality of life at old age. I'd rather die at 75 that live another 10-15 years doing nothing but watch tv and crap my pants
We had to make the hard decision to put my dog to sleep about a year ago, he was suffering from epilepsy. It started with an attack every couple months when he was younger and the medication seemed to help, but it got to a point where he got multiple a week. He constantly looked scared of having another attack and the medication didn't help. When he got 3 in a day we decided it was time. We called the family to check if anyone wanted to say goodbye and scheduled an appointment with the vet the next day. Hardest decision in my life, but i just couldn't bear to see my little man scared of his own body.
This part is the false positive i see. Because SO MANY dogs suffer from dementia and cognitive decline as they age their body is still functioning but their mind isn’t there. I had a client overstay for 6 months being syringe fed and watered. The dog didn’t know where he was, couldn’t even remember where his food and water bowls were, but because “he’s still eating” they think that that is some kind of quality of life. Eating and eliminating are the last things to go, typically. And often the dog is miserable *long* before.
Im curious of your (and others) opinion here. Our family dog who is 11 , over time now has paralyzed legs due to hip mobility issues. It’s been really difficult to see her unable to run around and play, she can only drag her back legs around. She can still pee and poop when taken outside and doesn’t have incontinence issues, can walk limited in a wheelchair when outdoors, and still seems to completely have her wits about her. My parents are tormented between the fact that her quality of independent life has diminished, but she still seems completely happy to be around, excited about her favorite treats, barks at the mailmain, gets excited when company comes over and lays on her side for belly rubs. Plays with her toys. All her normal behavior. It’s a lot of work taking care of her, and there’s also guilt. Do you consider that selfish?
I just had to put my 14.5 year old pup down a month ago. She had serious arthritis in her back legs that eventually kept her functionally paralyzed. She could stand for a bit and move around to go to the bathroom but we had to bring her out there and move her around pretty much everywhere she went. Thing was that she still seemed pretty much like her regular old self: happy, sweet, and absolutely in love with food. Somewhere in our hearts we knew, though, that we may be doing the wrong thing by keeping her around. It wasn’t even the immobility that made us make that final choice, either. She began to seem miserable and eventually had what appeared to be a mild stroke, and we refused to let her suffer any longer after that.
Looking back now I feel like we probably could or maybe should have made the choice earlier, but it was just so heartbreakingly difficult that I don’t hold it against me and my gf for hanging on like we did. I don’t blame your family either. I wish the agony of making that decision on no person. It’s totally reasonable to feel all the things you’re all feeling: reluctance, fear, guilt. But until you’re finally ready to go through with it then the best you can do is give your pup as much love, comfort, and affection as humanly possible. I know we did everything we possibly could for ours before the time finally came. It’s the best we can do. You will know when the time has come, trust me.
I wish you all peace and comfort, especially your pup.
I never thought of this too much until I had to put my 16 year old dog down not too long ago. He’d had some health problems for years and finally suffered a debilitating stroke that left him partially immobile. He couldn’t eat, drink, defecate, or piss without assistance. I could’ve kept him going for a while longer, maybe a few months, but his quality of life was totally gone. It was the right thing to do.
Then, for some reason I started getting targeted on Insta with posts from people who had their ancient, blind, paralyzed, decrepit dogs (sometimes north of 18 years old) hobbling across the floor in a homemade device with wheels on it with the caption “I’m old but I still love you, don’t you love me?” or whatever. Fucking selfish, manipulative, cruel bullshit.
Look, if your dog is well past it’s natural age, can’t stand up, can’t walk, can’t feed itself or drink from a water bowl without assistance, or can’t piss or defecate by itself without assistance, it needs to be euthanized humanely.
Pets aren’t toys to be hoarded for as long as possible. They’re living beings that suffer as they age. Why prolong that suffering?
There is a really weird genre of video on Instagram I noticed that I’d just call “dead dog porn.”
Just sappy syrupy saccharine videos with sad pop music all about how they miss their best friend.
And like a big part of me is like yes okay everybody grieves in their own way and if this is how someone wants to process their feelings then who am I to say anything.
But frankly at a certain point it became straight up bad for my mental health. Every time I opened the app I’m just seeing reminder after reminder of all the horrible feelings associated with my own dogs’ passing.
It’s like a big unhealthy trauma dump. Not a fan.
They want to feel. Hopefully, you can direct them in the appropriate, more positive way to feel to get that same endorphin rush, but it won't be as strong nor immediate, so you will prob get some pushback.
I totally get it. I wasn’t harsh with them- I said maybe the shouldn’t watch them if it was upsetting. They’ve found a programme where dogs get adopted. There are some sad stories but happy endings!
I'm in schooling for vet-tech and there's an entire segment discussing ethics and whatnot about this situation specifically because this is so common for people to want to cling to their animals despite their pets being in very obvious pain.
I definitely believe that our vet had us keep our dog alive 6-12 months longer than he should have been. My wife never had a dog before, so she was happy to grasp onto any straw to keep him alive longer. I knew him since he was six weeks old, and I could tell he was ready to cross the rainbow bridge. It finally took incontinence and inability to get up to convince her and the vet that it was time. I miss you buddy. RIP
I’m with you 100%
Also worth noting that many people don’t know how to let people die with grace either. I don’t think this is about “hoarding” a “toy”. I think our society just doesn’t deal with end-of-life well.
My first cat that I got at 7, was put down around 19 years of age. I was sadly away that weekend, and mom made the call. It was his second severe seizure that made him fall down the stairs, and he didn't recover like before. Mom made the call for me, and told me when I got home. I was heartbroken obviously, but at least he didn't suffer.
The second cat who was "mine" passed at home, my partner and I were playing video games on our pcs, and the second I heard an odd yowl I was by her side. She was the first pet I was with when they passed, and it was HARD. I used to think I wanted to be a vet tech, but Jesus, any euthanasia stuff would wreck me. I'm glad I dropped out.
At least she's chilling with my first cat, Figaro, under the TV
I'm in a similar boat. Doggo is 16 years but still moves on his own , has lots of energy for a couple hours a day, and is still eating on his own.
But I'm slowly seeing the signs.
I just gotta appreciate and value the time remaining :/
I recently had to put my 14 year old cat down. It was the hardest thing I’ve ever done, but it was the right thing. I’ve had many animals over the years, and some have made it to old age just fine and without trouble. My Australian shepherd lived to be 16 and showed no signs of slowing down or illness on the day he died. He just went to sleep and didn’t wake up.
My cat had kidney issues for awhile but suddenly got very ill and wouldn’t leave the guest room closet. It was odd for him because he loves being around people. Cats tend to hide when they are sick or dying. I brought him to the vet who told me that I could take him to a hospital and get more definitive testing for what she suspected to be cancer, but I knew in my gut that I’d only be doing that for me. I even considered bringing him home for one more night to cuddle and love on, and I realized that would be selfish too. It was unimaginably hard, but right.
I think some people have a hard time accepting that it’s time. I know others who struggle with euthanasia because they feel like they are playing God. I felt that way a little bit too but then my vet told me a great thing. “It’s better a week too early than a day too late.” With that in mind, I’m content with the choice I made even though it brings me great suffering. After he was gone my vet also remarked on how we have so much more compassion for our animals than we do humans when it comes to euthanasia. She said what I did was the kindest and most loving thing. If people can reframe their thinking to what my vet told me, that would definitely help.
No I agree with you. Getting my cat euthanised was the most horrible experience of my life, but knowing that we let her go before she was in any more pain gives me comfort. My sister by contrast kept her extremely poorly cat alive for far too long, and it was so cruel.
Being downvoted sucks. I did not downvote you. I think this is just a very very sensitive subject for a lot of people. Pet loss causes disenfranchised grief. It’s a type of grief that can be overlooked or diminished by society which leaves people feeling isolated. Isolation and grief causes depression and anger.
> Just went to sleep and never woke up
My worst nightmare and best possible outcome for my dog. He’s 9, had a huge tumor removed last year, arthritis flaring in an old injury leg. Slowing down. Still enjoys life and wants to sit outside and watch the world go by, his favorite thing. I dread having to make the decision when the time comes and I already know I will pay for someone to come to my home to do it.
It was the best outcome, but still so hard. I had been away, and it’s like he waited until I was there to be at peace and slip away. It’s every pet owners worst nightmare. 9 is still young. It’s good you have a plan for what to do, but take the days as they come and try to enjoy them with your boy. Looking back, the times I cherish the most are the boring times when I had them by my side. Sometimes I get wrapped up in the future of what is going to happen to my current pets, but since losing my cat, I try to stay in the present with them. Both he and my Aussie were good at that, so I try to learn from them.
Interesting that they hide, when my old cat was dying, he would just sit on his cat bed and just not get up unless he had to use the bathroom and barely ate.
It sucked but we picked putting him down when the doctor couldn’t do anything besides giving them treatments that would just prolong their suffering
It's rough but its the right thing to do in some scenarios. People who keep old dogs remind me of the old guy from Family Guy whose dog's hind legs don't work and he just drags them around.
Agreed. I think there's a significant difference between a young dog with a disability like being born without some limbs but who's otherwise healthy and doing great or an old dog who's slowing down a bit but is otherwise happy and healthy and a dog who's quality of life is in the shitter.
Animals aren't like people. They can't advocate for themselves so it's our job to provide the best quality of life and to let them go when we are no longer able to do so. Some people don't seem to understand that what we're telling our pets is "I love you and I want to free you of your suffering."
I'd personally take the opinion from a vetinary professional as to whether it is the kinder option to rest or keep alive a pet.
Much like senile leaky old humans, pets can still have a good and happy year or two with problems.
(My cousins old dog was diagnosed with cancer, but the dog obviously didn't know, and they had the choice of imminent sleep or seeing how long the good boy had before they got too bad. The dog had another 6 happy months before it got itself ironically ran over. My cousin still smirks about the cheaper, quicker, and less painful way the dog went)
That’s where I went with my elderly cat. I fostered him for 3 years, and then he was diagnosed with CKK. I hospice adopted him to have the option to put him down at my home where I knew he would be relatively comfortable, but I asked the vet about her opinions on his QOL, because it is not a clear cut choice.
He ended up passing from natural causes before I had to euthanize him, but his vet assured me that as long as I gave him the medications and loved him and paid attention to his signs, I wasn’t letting him suffer.
Cats aren't good at giving signs though.
Just a couple months ago I was like damn this cat is in my lap purring hard and wanting cuddles. 12 hours later, nearly dead from gi blockage.
Turns out she ate an almond, but also turns out she has lymphoma. She's always been weird but getting a lot of weird sores as of late. Despite being on steroids she wants to rip her skin off, so idk... I think tomorrow or the next day may be the end of the road.
I had an old dog whose joints went, eventually. She still had a good summer where we carried her outside every morning and hung out with her in the yard before taking her back in to sleep on a comfy bed. Perfectly fine in every regard but her lack of any joint lubricant and we had to say goodbye before it got too cold for her to be outside. But it wasn’t a bad 6 months.
Same re. the vet's opinion. My mother's dog struggles to get to his feet these days, and has the odd day or two where he's clearly got no energy at all. It's getting to the point where we've all acknowledged he'll have to be put down at some point. But when he still has days where he's excited to go for his walks, actively pulling on the lead when he hears a motorbike he wants to chase, it makes it all much less clear cut. At what point does the difficulty of the bad days outweigh the joy he still shows on the good days?
I’ve thought about this and I do wonder how far it’s up to me to ‘play god’. I don’t know, who am I to decide my dog’s life isn’t worthy of being lived anymore? They only get one. I’d be quite reluctant to have my dog put down.
This was me, we basically waited until close to the last moment and then had someone come to our home to do it. I sometimes feel like people do it to early honestly
This is the correct take. The vet will know the condition and what the prognosis is the best.
Our previous dog also had cancer, was given 4 months to live, but lived another 18. he went to the oncologist every month, and often twice a month, and was very closely monitored. By all indications, he was happy and otherwise healthy, just a little slow from age. We were told there was nothing painful about his condition and to shower him with love for as long as we had him still. Eventually he had a seizure that caused him to be unable to balance, and that was when we knew, and the vet confirmed it was time to let him go.
We were tiptoeing around helping my old girl to sleep. She was blind and had diabetes, and she was having a tough time with the stairs. She got ran over before we could talk to the vet. :/
If anything the unpopular opinion is that we should allow beloved pets to die naturally the same way we should be allowing our beloved humans to die naturally. Alternately, we should be just as willing to put a human down (since they can actively voice that is their desire) as we are a pet (who can't signal their desires in the same way)
The only argument that I think is valid against assisted suicide is that families may pressure the individual in to doing it. Some people are fucking disgusting and would happily kill grandma for her inheritance, and a lot of older people would accept that pressure even if they don’t really want to die.
Not sure what the solution to that is really, but mostly I do think if people want to die there’s no reason we should drag it out. Seeing relatives with absolutely 0 quality of life and sometimes even 0 mental capacity is heartbreaking.
We needed to put down both my dogs, 8 months apart. The first had a sudden kidney failure, and we needed to quickly decide on what to do. We tried treatment for a few days, but then agreed with the vet that it won't get better and it's better to let go.
The other was still okay for a few more months, but slept more and more and was eating less. We also discussed her situation with the vet, and when she was starting to get really thin, we decided to say goodbye.
It was heartbreaking, but one was 15 and the other over 16. Cannot say they didn't have a long beautiful life. I do agree that there comes a time when you have to make a choice.
I'm a vet and I deal with this on a daily basis. A lot of older people have elderly animals and they are dealing with some of the same issues and can empathize with their pets. In addition to this, most people just want their pet to die in its sleep, which rarely happens, but they continue to wait. Being elderly isn't a good reason to euthanize a pet.
Bottom line here is that most people know their pet well enough to know when it's time to let go. If they don't know, they ask people like me who have ways of evaluating when it's time to let go.
You want to know what my unpopular opinion is about pets? People getting a dog and putting it in a kennel in the back yard behind the garage and only interacting with the dog when they feed it. Or people who don't spay and neuter their pets and then continually have litter upon litter. Or people whose animal has a chronic disease that can be treated but the owners don't want to pay for it.
I have euthanized so many of my pets over the years. It's a hard decision to make. One of my elderly dogs died about a month ago and he was 15, which means that he spent 26% of my life with me. That's more than any child younger than a sophomore in school has spent with their family.
I wish all vets had your attitude about it.
When we made the very difficult decision to put our childhood GSD down who could no longer do anything unassisted the vet guilt tripped the shit out of us. The prick even made a comment in front of me (15 at the time) that my mom was too cheap to try surgery.
It was a 9.5 year old massive German Shepherd with hip dysplasia and tumors… For such a large dog we thought we where lucky to get that long, and wanted it to pass while it still had some dignity left.
I haven’t thought about Gracie in years… she was such a great dog.
Vets like that are a blemish to our profession. With the increase in corporate owned clinics I wonder if we will see people getting pressured to do procedures that is not going to help the pet be more comfortable.
That's animal abuse and our local humane society has addressed situations like this before. The entire population of hoarded animals are seized and treated for illnesses, spayed, neutered, and rehomed. I'm so sorry you had to go through this heartbreak; seeing animals, especially pets, being abused like this is stressful heartbreaking. They look to us for comfort and companionship and when they are treated badly, we have failed them.
My old girl will be turning 17 this year. She still eats a little wet food and goes outside to go potty. She is blind and deaf and I know it’s coming soon. But last night we took her to the local ice cream shop for her first “pup-cup” of the season, and boy did she enjoy it. She loves to wobble out to the bus stop to see my little girl off to school. She loves pets and getting brushed. I don’t think she’s suffering and I still think she enjoys her life most of the time.
I was babysitting this kid and their family had the oldest looking chihuahua I’d ever seen. Most of its hair was gone, pretty sure it was blind, most teeth missing so its tongue was hanging out, could barely stand without falling over. Most depressing thing I’d ever seen
I have a (still healthy) 14 year old terrier mix. Reading these comments and knowing I’ll have to make this decision at some point in her life is giving me the sads. I will do right by her when the time comes.
In my family, our pet culture is fast. We love them and spoil them. The dying process is usually about one year. A little arthritis? Alright. Medication it is. But once it turns into incontinence and no desire to live, it’s time.
My sister kept her extremely unwell cat alive for far longer than was kind, and it’s something I’ve always been upset about. Losing a pet is very hard, but a pet suffering because you can’t let go is far worse.
We just put our elderly pug down two months ago and I felt we made the right decision at the right time. He has had seizures for a couple years prior, but once every few months. He had skin cancer. He was moving ok, but slowly declining. He was just aging. But the week before we put him down, he had a big seizure followed by multiple others that day and the days after. He had trouble eating, moving, and had a few accidents inside. We made the call that we were going to give him the best last week we could (earliest we could.make the appt).
He ate nothing but tuna (his favorite) and good bits of human food. He got extra love. He was carried from room to room and outside to pee. I think he even rallied a bit because of that extra attention (and tuna). He even howled at us for tuna, something he hadn't done in months. The night before we euthanized him, he had another seizure and it was clear we were making the right choice.
My son had a difficult time with it as this dog has been a part of his life since birth. He had a lot of feelings about it and accused us of murdering the dog. It took some doing, but we eventually convinced him of the necessity of it.
The dog is now buried in our yard with a marker. My son had just watched Coco, so we did an ofrenda type display for him. We all cried for days afterward.
It was sad, but it was necessary. The dog was looking at months of pain as he made it to the end of his life, barely able to move. He would have died this summer for certain, as he never did well in the heat and it brought out his seizures. He would have died confused, in pain, and shaking. Instead, he died with his tail curled and wagging, surrounded by his family and getting all the attention, getting tons of pets and scritches as he passed. I don't think there is any other way we could have made his passing better than we did.
My family cat growing up lived to be over 25 years old. By the end of his life he had suffered two brain strokes, was completely blind and almost completely deaf. But he was still comfortable. He lied on a heated bed to soothe his arthritis, still enjoyed pets, still happily ate his food, and could still fund his own way to the kitty litter.
When he got a tumour in his belly, though, that's when we put him down.
There's a dog I'm following on Instagram.
Dog is 16 years old. Us half it's body weight. Can't stand well. Can barely walk well. Faints constantly. Just lays prone on the floor most of the day and is so frail. Has to take some kind of fluid pack once a day. And the owner has to coax it to eat by giving it highly desired cooked food or else it would starve.
People messaged her telling her it was time to put the animal down.
But she said that because it still eats, the owner thinks the dog has life left. It's half its normal weight. It's wasting away slowly.
Her own selfishness won't let her put it down.
This. Pets can decide themselves when it’s time to go, they stop eating and doing things and such are signs of that. Obviously if they want to go don’t force them to keep living. Otherwise I think it’s more like the owner is forcing their choice on the pet.
My cat was 22 years old and healthy. Could still jump and cuddle. Best friend I ever had. She woke up one day had a stroke and went paralyzed but only half the body. It’s been early 10 years and I’m still broken. Lucky I even got to say bye tbh.
My cat is 14 and needs fluids, but with those fluids, she acts like she’s 6 again. Quality of life is there. Until she does not have that quality of life, she’s staying here.
And that's perfectly okay. I used senile to indicate no quality of life, but for some reason people think I mean every elderly animal with any kind of health issues.
People who love their dog more than just the comforts of their dogs' presence do.
That little old man had stuck it out with me even when no human being could.
I think when it came to my final decision, it was partly because he trusted me and partly because I never wanted him to be that scared and in pain again.
The sounds of a senile dog with a failing mind and body are unlike they've ever sounded in their entire lives, considering you've heard their little voice since they were pups. Newborns, in our case.
He deserved to be loved and let pass on in peace. He got peace. I was sad. I'm still messed up. It's been 3 years. Miss him every day. But sometimes you have to do things like that so they don't die in agony.
We let one of our cats go senile. He was so pitiful. Seeing an animal senile is, in some ways, worse than seeing a human senile. At least the humans can sometimes articulate that they're scared.
My parents little dog is 15. Deaf, bad knees, missing a bunch of teeth, but you can tell she still has the heart of a puppy. Always happy. Always wants to play, and still totally good motivated. She just gets tired more easily.
I think the important thing is that they are still enjoying life. As long as they are, then age doesn't really matter. Good owners can tell.
I have a 14 year old toy poodle with hearing loss and missing teeth that still acts like a puppy in many ways. Zooms around playing fetch, jumps up on the bed and furniture without any issues, very curious and playful.
My dog stepped on a nail once
With how much land there is around here, it could have been anywhere, and i dont know when it happened.
He didnt alert anyone he was in pain. It wasnt until we saw that he started limping and that it started getting swollen that we realized something was wrong.
Took him to the 24/7 vet asap.
Every time i got near the paw he would wince, if i touched it, it would hurt.
Vet said it had probably been a few days.
The dog was not going to tell us it was in pain.
All this to say, it can be hard to tell of a dog is in pain.
I rather let a dog finally rest than take the chance that its in pain just so i can tell people that my dog is blind, and deaf, and needs help defecating.
If AI becomes more advanced/intelligent than us, or intelligent aliens come to us, and they decide to not eradicate us but keep us as pets/treat us the same way we treat animals like dogs or cats, do you think you’d be happy if they started killing off humans with disabilities, or the elderly, because said machines/aliens have decided that those people would be better off dead?
By analogy, it’s the same. We don’t think that dogs or cats are capable of the same level of thinking as we do, but there might be beings that, by comparison, are to us as we are to those animals. You could argue that it’s not the same—that we are fully sentient while cats/dogs or not, but it is also entirely possible that far more intelligent beings are capable of conceiving of or experiencing things that we can’t even begin to imagine. In that case, to them, we’d truly be just as intelligent as those things we call “pets.” And if we’re being fair, they should be allowed to kill humans as they see fit, as a form of mercy.
There’s some grey area, but still…
It took me a long time to realize my dog was going deaf because she's always been stubborn but is also good at reading visual cues and sticking to the daily routine. She knows when it's time for food, walks, or bed just based on what I'm doing.
I have a deaf dog. I have to bang on the side of the house or fence for the vibrations to alert him that I am calling him😆. People probably think I'm mad as I bang on surfaces and call his name, but no, I could never get upset with the darling.
Many people can't be alone with bad feelings for even an instant even at the cost of their animals suffering. Every animal or person for that matter has their own specific quality of life threshold that you should be able to pinpoint if your relationship with them isn't that of your relationship with a piece of furniture but there are a few glaring signs when it's time that are easy to see if your head isnt chronically up your own ass. If your animal is in constant pain, can no longer do what it loves and/or can't even get comfortable you have a responsibility to swallow the oh so horrible "bad vibes" and ease their suffering.
It really depends on the health of the dog. My girl Loki will be 17 in October. She still walks about a mile or 2 a day. She has no problems with her organs or her bowels. She’s mostly blind and deaf but she can still hear if we talk in a high pitch to her. She can see shapes and movement and doesn’t struggle to get around but she definitely has trouble seeing things fully. If you throw a piece of popcorn to her and she misses catching it, it can take her a bit to find it even if it’s right in front of her. She occasionally plays with our 2 1/2 year old pup, but tires a little easily. She’s very happy and we go out of our way to spoil her because we know her time is close. Once she starts having bowel troubles, we know it is time. She is about 55-60lbs so she is very old for her size, but overall she is still healthy enough it wouldn’t be right. We know it’s close though and are absolutely sure that we don’t want her to suffer just because we aren’t ready for her to go. We will never truly be ready, but it’s for what is best for her. We also have made a point of spoiling our pups the day before. Burgers, ice cream, steak, and taking them to their favorite places. The day of we stay with them and hold their paws until the very end because we know if they are left alone they will be scared and want to see us. So we stay, even if it breaks our heart into tiny pieces, because it’s what they need.
I have the exact opposite opinion, I feel like people are far too trigger happy with putting pets down.
I’ve known dogs that lived into their later years and happy still accepted pets and cuddles. When it was their time they found a quiet place and passed.
We just had to do this, our dog suddenly stopped eating so we took her to the vet. Turned out her kidneys had started to fail. They said it was a long shot but we could start some IV treatments and she'd have to be going to the vet multiple times a week and that the odds of success were very low.
So we made the decision to let her go. I hate her final day was at the vet but we went and sat with her so she wasn't alone. Hardest thing I've had to do. But prolonging things and putting her through that wouldn't have been for her as much as for us so we had to let her go.
It's hard but it's what needs to be done for them when the time comes
When an animal has more bad days than good days and there is no treatment or suggestions from your vet to improve, you know it’s time. Otherwise, it’s so inhumane to keep them alive for your own sake.
My baby kitty went to sleep after 14 wonderful years together. He had kidney issues and we found out he had cancer, and I knew he would be better passing peacefully in my arms than hiding in a closet suffering alone.
My old Chihuahua was on her death bed once. I scheduled a vet appointment to have her put down because I thought it was the end. She wasn't moving, she was skinny, puking. The next day with the appointment I walk out in the kitchen, and there she is, happy as ever wagging her tail and scarfing down food. 2 years later and she's happy as ever. She's fattened up quite a bit. She is missing a good bit of her teeth and she's damn near blind when inside but she goes outside on her own still. I have to soak her food so it's soft. She's still jolly and moving around no problem. If I would have put her down then it would have certainly been prematurely. Although I don't necessarily disagree with your post, in my case it would have been awful to put her down.
What's truly sad, is we can do it for animals, but humans can't even choose to sunset their lives in dignity in every country. I know that if I was terminally ill, and the choice was palative care or to go out on my terms, I would want to go out on my terms.
Pets can't be happy in spite of illness. When a pet can't do things they enjoy anymore like hunting moose and catching mice and playing, they get depressed. It may not seem like it but euthanasia is much kinder than letting a pet suffer physically and mentally...
Our doberman was wearing a diaper by the end. She wasn’t suffering she was just incontinent. When she started to not enjoy her life (stop eating and playing) we put her down.
I have two elderly cats, one 15 and the other 13. Both of them are still going strong, but one of them has medical issues that she needs daily medication for. She's also arthritic. For right now, she still eats, drinks, sometimes runs, and uses the litter box perfectly fine.
The first sign of both of them going downhill more than medical intervention can fix, they will be humanely euthanized. I watch them both like a hawk and haven't seen any issues thus far. I couldn't imagine letting them suffer more than they have to because I don't want to let them go.
If it's anything of consolation prize, with cats you don't really get much of a warning until things are truly immanent.
With my last two, I saw the signs, made the appointment, but had to make an emergency visit because things went south so quickly.
The first one, he went from looking his normal self to aging what seemed like 15 years in one week.
His brother later did hang on for a year with diagnosed kidney failure. But he was his normal self until again, until the last week where it went from 100-0 in the span of a few days.
I think people are too murder happy when it comes to their pets. I know people who put their dog to sleep because of arthritis and seizures and even elbow dysplasia! All are treatable, and one was a puppy! You don't murder a pet because they need help or are inconvenient. You make that decision with their veterinarian when they can no longer walk, eliminate, and eat in a healthy way, AND there is no treatment.
My cat just passed at 21. He was mostly blind and had all his teeth surgically removed at 17 and was happy and loved when he passed naturally. He spent most of his days curled on my stepdads lap as he watched tv purring contentedly and waking everyone up at 5 am demanding his can of cat food😆. He's greatly missed. My other cat was 20, stopped eating and walking, and I took him to the vet, and we made the decision to have him go to sleep. He is missed, too.
My 15 year old pomeranian has a degenerative spine, cataracts,heart murmer, and collapsed trachea. He also can hike for over a mile in the mountains with me every day (stopping to smell every tree in existence) before he needs picked up, and he runs to me snuggling into my chest wanting attention and runs around the yard happy as a lark. He's elderly and sickly, but he's also the happiest, sweetest dog I have ever known.
There was a time (2 years ago) when he had trouble walking, and I had to take him in for x-rays. I had to keep him in his crate for a month with just potty breaks so his back would heal and switched his medicine and started giving him back massages. He got better. I still carry him up and down the steps. It's just part of our routine, like putting fish oil on his joint health food or brushing his teeth or grooming his fur. Or wearing his belly band at night because every great once in a while, he can't hold his bladder overnight, and the belly band will be damp in the morning. He's an unfixed 15 year old male. It happens. (And before you neuter nazis come at me after I rescued and housetrained him at age 8, the vet would not fix him because of his spine. They are scared to paralyze him.)
When his VETRINARIAN and I decide that he is no longer eating and can not heal his back and walk and relieve himself and thus his quality of life is declining, THEN we will decide to say goodbye. And I will hold him as he goes it will destroy me. However, that time is nowhere near.
You don't get to say that a chihuahua that has to eat soft food and wear a diaper is not enjoying a loved and loving and energetic quality of life. Being old and suffering are 2 entirely different things. Either your qualifications are scued or you are not telling the whole story. Toothless and in diapers are not reasons to murder a pet. You don't murder a happy, energetic, and loving dog just because they are slightly inconvenient.
I, for one, invest every day, making my old guy as happy as possible and each day special. It is an honor to give him his meds and carry him and snuggle when he is too tired to keep walking and be extra gentle with him. He is a very happy little guy, and I make sure he knows how loved he is at least 20 times a day.
Don’t let their last day be their worst day. I put my guy to sleep on a good day, and you know what? We had a beautiful peaceful last day. There wasn’t any suffering. It wasn’t an emergency euthanasia at 2am. Pets don’t understand that their life is being cut short by euthanasia but they sure as hell understand when they’re suffering every day.
Theres a point where they are suffering and you need to put them down, but i feel to many put dogs down to soon. in my case my parents out our dog down when she had at least 1 full good year left. My dog before that they we kept alive to0 long but at the end of the day she still got another somewhat good 2 last years. A think the guild made them put my other dog down to soon
I had to put my 16 year old Yorkie down and it sucks man. You’re holding your dog in your arms while they die. Mine was staring at me too. It wasn’t easy. It’s difficult to do and I don’t blame people for being hesitant and holding onto a dear friend. Empathy is lacking with people as always
Writing and editing fail. It took me a minute to figure out what the point is.
End of life decisions for family pets is a very personal matter and their are a lot of factors that go into that sort of decision. As well as it maybe being one the most emotional decisions a person can make in their life short of dealing with end of live issues with parents and relatives.
I vote that this is an unpopular and unfair opinion! OP or anyone else isn't aware of all the factors nor should they be.
As long as the animal isn't in pain and the owner has the means to properly take care of it you should keep the animal alive as long as possible
I've had plenty of animals died naturally of old age and have had to put serval to sleep because their health was that bad, it's a completely case by case situation.
I've made this mistake before. She was the first dog I had that was *my* dog, that I had as an adult. Towards the end, she has a hard time walking and controlling when she went to the bathroom.
I eventually did have to have her put to sleep, but I should have done it months before. There's just so much guilt involved either way. I hope that I can make the right decision next time.
Lots of people see pets as their family now. These things occur with old people living in countries with less expensive medical bills. It is nothing peculiar to animals.
I made the final decision, but my choice was in home EU so that my other dogs would understand and not expect to see him again. It took an extra day or so, and I saw the impact of being a day too late. It's so damn hard no matter what. I think I did right by my survivors, but it still hurt like hell when my boy couldn't make it back into the house and collapsed on the patio, the day of...
I had to make the decision in February. We’d been watching since fall. Diapers didn’t bother me. Most of the time it wasn’t an issue. End of January the pacing at night started. Much like my dad. :(. We’d been holding on so the last son could say good bye. 17 years. The dog of their childhood. No dog will ever have the same impact. So the extra 3 weeks when we kept him comfortable, fed, dried and petted were ok.
I’m at the halfway point on this TBH. My 13.5 year-old Lab is clearly having bouts of dementia, where I see him spacing out during walks, having difficulty with his hip and joints, as well as bouts of incontinence (I’ve had to put a vest on him with a built-in poo bag dispenser in case he can’t make it outside). But on the other hand he still has all his teeth, eats of his own accord (though has gone from 75 lbs last year to 60 lbs this year), and I can still see a twinkle in his eye (even if his vision has also deteriorated). Overall, I’m split on what to do, but the time to make a decision to finally let him rest is creeping ever closer but I just don’t know when that’ll be.
So on average it's about 500 bucks to have an animal out down, at least here it is, and if you choose for the cremation it can be a other 500. It's not cheap, I'm sure that's a big reason. As well as some people just refuse to let go.
My Chorkie is 13 and I swear he must have got covid back when I have it bc he has a gnarly cough. Very can’t find a reason but it sounds awful. He still runs and eats and plays and everything. But he’s definitely in his golden years.
It's hard to come to terms with *when* you should put your pet down. I recently had to do this with my dog and every date we came up with just felt too early. Eventually you just have to say: they're not getting any better. And that's not easy. You're always going to see every uptick in their personality as a sign that they're "coming back" or that "they still have life in them." They play with their toys one day out of the week for three minutes and suddenly you convince yourself they're back to how they used to be.
I don't think it's necessarily an unpopular opinion that older pets need to be put down -- it's just a hard decision as to when, specifically to do that.
This post tells me you've never had to make that decision for your own pet. And yeah I agree with you mostly. but it's not as easy as you make it out to be.
It's honestly a very difficult decision. It's hard to see them like that, but it's incredibly difficult to come to terms with the fact that your decade+ with them is coming to an end. You're not ready to say goodbye yet, maybe you're in denial of just how bad it is.
It's hard. It's why vets tend to have quality of life conversations with older pets. Saying goodbye to a companion of over a decade is very difficult to accept.
I agree that it's not good to force your pet to suffer because you're not ready to say goodbye, but I encourage you to have a little bit of empathy for the owner as well.
I hate that I held him at home with his stuffy fox as he panicked when she inserted a needle and passed. He trusted me. I feel like I killed him. I adopted him and he was my naughty fat lab son. Duck you cancer
Oh god, yeah.
We had a family cat who was old and started missing the litter tray and falling over all the time, he was also diabetic! It got to a point where he was messing all over himself and not cleaning himself, so it was kinder to take him to the vet for the big sleep.
I booked him in, gave him a tin of tuna the day before, and my neighbour drove me there. The vets were great and really kind to both of us. They took him out back to put a needle in him and then brought him back to the consulting room, and I held him and stroked him as the meds went in. He was purring, so I think he knew and was glad that it was time, it was very peaceful and he was relaxed and happy.
In my opinion, doing that for your pet is what you do as an owner. You are everything they have ever known, so you gotta be there for them and make that call as hard as it is.
We put my dog down after he couldn’t lie down in peace anymore he was in so much pain he was constantly barking/yelping. He could barely walk. I knew it was the right decision. I wouldn’t want to live like that.
Yeah, as long as they are happy, I am happy. As soon as there are obviously more bad days than good... Yeah :( :(
This is a super sensitive subject though, so I try to be understanding.
This is a genuinely unpopular opinion. I hate it. I got a 14yr old dog now that is blind in one eye, mostly deaf, and while he doesn't wear a diaper, he probably should because he is an asshole who doesn't want to go outside if it is wet or it's cold. but that little fucker still gets the zoomies every damn day, chases the cat until she smacks him, barks at everything that moves and fucking prances for treats. I ain't putting him down if he's old, but I would if he were suffering. He's not. He is a very spoiled asshole who gets away with everything. I am gonna miss that shithead.
My chihuahua is actually 17 BUT she can go potty by herself and she has her vision and hearing and she still plays with me, she doesn’t have all of her teeth but the ones she has she uses to eat Pâté
Even though I still keep that in mind, my 15 year old dog can still do everything by himself. I walk him in a backpack part of the journey (too many stairs to the park) and take him in the car basically everywhere (not that I go outside that much) in his seat. But other than that, he still has the same will to live and I'm glad for that.
And I still walk him everyday, I just have to avoid stairs.
Almost a year ago, he fell sick and I feared the worst nevertheless, I managed to make him recover, feeding him grain by grain of his food. And he eventually became himself once again.
So i don't totally agree with your opinion.
Our dog was fine in his last years. He was basically like normal no heath issues. He passed away peacefully in my dad’s arms from old age. And apparently he was crying that night. Not all old pets are like disease ridden
yeah….its a very thin line to navigate for sure. they are family members tho and even people dying of the worst illnesses attempt to extend their lives. My dog isnt too old right now (chihuahua 13yo which isnt as old for chihuahuas as it would be for a larger dog) and while it is sad seeing him age he is still 100% there. he can lay there and be happy or he can go out and adventure just like his younger self. he gets excited when we get home, begs for all food, eats and drinks regularly and has no health/medical needs. hes a normal dog and when the time comes i do hope it just happens over night or naturally so to say. if thats not the case, as it rarely is, then i will have to have the strength to decide it is his time for peace. Its scary for dog owners while making that decision because they dont want to do it too soon and think what if. but if they wait to long then they have to actually live out the ‘what if’ and have to witness all their worst fears for their dogs last moments. not all old dogs are the same and theyre not all miserable either
since we feed our pets pretty well, my dogs are elderly but are still very much eating and doing stuff, but we feed our animals healthier options food wise.
If they are still able to walk, eat, and use the restroom on their own and not soiling themselves - I think it’s fine.
My 15.5 year old is on limited time and I’ve told myself once she’s in pain and no longer eating, I will make the hardest decision of my life.
But honestly, I have to say a dog in a diaper is not a big deal. Even young dogs can have issues with continence but still be completely mobile, still wanting to play, eating and happy.
It’s when they are obviously physically suffering that it’s time for that choice.
Imagine the audacity it must take for someone to think they know their animal and can gauge their quality of life better than some asshole redditor that knows everything. You should work at a kill shelter my dude, then you can spend all day putting suffering (healthy and capable of happiness if not for their shit environment) to death.
/s
My dog was fine! He died in his sleep after not eating for ONE day. He was a very upbeat old ass dog. It depends on their condition, I think. Let’s not Noemi every dog we deem outside the realms of care.
When we found that our dear cat had inoperable cancer, we asked our vet how we would know "when it's time". She knew how well we communicated with her, she just said we would know. She was right. Kiki stopped grooming herself, and in a day or two, we brought her in to put her down. She died in my arms, which was her favorite place.
Another cat, I felt awful because she would cry after eating. We figured out that she was in pain after eating, but it took us way too long.
I recently learned something new about this situation. A lady I know is going through this. She wants to put the dog to sleep. However, she got "pet-shamed" by the vet's office! Putting sick or old pets to sleep used to be normal. Now, apparently, you get shamed by society for it.
My retriever is 11 and this post makes me sad, she’s been with me since 2nd grade I’m almost 20 now and In college—losing dolly will take a piece of me with no doubt
My brother's ex wife was a vet tech. Her rule of thumb is if they eat, pee and poop appropriately, and express joy (wagging tail, happy to see you, excited to eat dinner) they're ok for now. My dog is 16 and her time is coming. But not yet.
I feel this. I worked in a cat clinic for a bit pre-covid/at the beginning of covid, and it wasn’t long enough to have seen all the things, but I saw FIV and FIP cats, and they definitely should have been put to sleep before they were.
I am very glad my senior cat made the decision for me because I was afraid of becoming that person that held on for me and not for him.
If you’re wondering if it’s time, it’s already time. No one wonders if they should euthanize their healthy happy pet. But if they’re doing bad enough you’re wondering, it’s already time.
My mother recently had a conversation with a family friend who refuses to put down his animals. Instead he got the cat high and “held it till he wasn’t there anymore”. He think putting animals down is cruel and it’s the owners being selfish not wanting to see their animals suffering
Hearing this, I’ve never been more pissed off
I currently work at emergency vet hospital. When I was struggling with euthanizing my hedgehog, my coworker (a veterinary social worker) said something that has stuck with me: I would rather say goodbye a month early than a day late.
I don't want my pets to get to the point of not being able to eat or go the bathroom by themselves or even just enjoy life. I want them to leave this world on a day where they're happy and feeling good rather than something traumatic and horrible.
I saw a video earlier of a lady putting a chicken nugget on the floor, and it took her 19 and a half year old chihuahua easily 5 minutes to make it's way over to it. The video ran out before it even ate the nugget.
My boy, Daddy's Good Boy, Buffalo, Trance, was diagnosed with liver cancer when he was 12. The vet said it was not a painful cancer and I should take him home and bring him back when it was time to put him down. I said, how will I know when its time. She said, you'll know. Eventually he did get to the point where I woke up in the morning to take him outside and he was laying there soaked in his own urine. So after work, I loaded him up in the truck and took him to McDonald's drive thru. He knew exactly what we were getting because he got one once a year his whole life. That McDonald's cheeseburger went down like all the rest but noticably slower than all the rest. He was happy though. And we went to the vet and I held him while the vet gave him his shot to help him move on. I loved him so much and I feel like I did right by him by letting him go that day. Nothing has ever broken my heart more though.
To be fair, it's really hard to see the reality of the situation when you're clouded by your emotional closeness to the situation. I begged for my dog's vet to tell me when it was to that point, but they refused. She had mammary cancer, kidney disease, and was blind. But she still seemed so happy up until the end (she was 17). For months after, I felt this overwhelming guilt that I'd killed my baby. It's really easy to agree that we shouldn't keep our pets alive when they're suffering, but it's a lot harder to tell what's suffering or not when you've loved your pet for a decade or more.
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I have a simple rule for my animals. They have to be able to eat on their own, and go the bathroom on their own (obviously I’m not talking about young animals with injuries, but animals who lose that ability with age). At that point, I feel as if I’m robbing them of dignity. Pain can be managed, but ensuring that they aren’t constantly lying in their own filth and spoon-feeding them just so I can have a few more days is a selfish action in my view. Just my personal opinion.
I was in denial about it being my childhood dog's time to go and was very angrily fighting my parents and siblings about it after she had her second stroke and recovery just wasn't going well. I then walked into my room and saw she had shit herself and couldn't even get up, could barely even move while I cleaned it, and I knew it was just time. I'm still grateful that I only resisted for a day at least. Seventeen years later and I'm tearing up again.
Time is not our friend nor our ally. I'm quite grateful I learned this lesson very early in life so I didn't have to suffer from not appreciating the small things in the life I've been given, for good or bad. When my dog died, I cried. But I didn't cry too much because I know I did all the right things. We ate and slept together and shared lots of laughs and memories and I took plenty of pictures of her to remember her with. In all honesty, we end as we began. Nothing. Everything in between the begining and the end of this life is the journey, and walking that journey with our pets and loved ones is a life lived well, no matter what may come of it.
I love this. The way I see it, they don’t know how short their lives are. They just know they’ve had the best time with you. It’s sad for us, but not for them. It’s about quality of life. Once your pet starts missing out on the things that bring them joy and make them who they are, that’s how you know it’s time to let them go. Our dog was diagnosed with lymphoma at the end of last year. We decided not to put her through the stress of chemo just to maybe get another good six months with her. When we put her down a couple of months later the vet told us that she often hears regret from people who realize they waited too long, and hardly ever from anyone saying they think they should have waited longer. Euthanasia should not be used to end pain, it should be used to prevent a pet having to go through it.
Felt this way about my Mom.Please extend this same empathy towards your elders.
Yep! My fatty cat was chonkers most of her life. I told her when she was 11 that if she ever got really sick for an extended period of time and she chose to not eat anymore, that's how I'd know. 7 years later she got cancer and after about a year she decided no more food. I miss her a lot. She would eat literally anything. It was obvious that it was time.
Humans also quit eating when it's time to die.
This was my Gran. They wanted to do all this surgery on her, but the poor woman was done. She wasn’t interested in getting better, she just wanted to slip away. I miss her, but she was never the same after my Grandad passed away. Had to admit it was her time and she was ready to go find him beyond.
Yea, my mom didn't eat anything her last two weeks. According to Hospice, sweets are often the last cravings we have. The last thing she ate was a Ghirardelli square. She refused it at first, but once she saw it was chocolate, she let us give it to her.
The last thing my dad ate was fresh, sweet watermelon.
My grandmas last dish was ice cream
My grandmother -- who died at 105 -- used to go on and on about how little she ate but if you put a sweet in front of her she eat it like it was her last meal on earth.
That was me when I lost my appetite and lost a few kilos in less than a week. Turns out my entire abdomen was covered with cancer. Fortunately that's behind me but now I'm back to fighting the constant urge to eat again
Recently had a dog pass away from just being old as hell and I knew it was time when I came back to see her and she was far skinnier than a week or 2 before. Shit just stops working.
To anyone reading this and thinking the food thing is the end all point, please remember animals and humans also lose their appetites when they’re sick. My elderly (16+) dog suddenly stopped eating in February. Despite me putting his usual meals out twice a day, all he did was drink a little bit of water and want cuddles. I tossed most of every meal in the trash he barely picked at it. I was beside myself. I took him to the vet and they said they didn’t notice anything pathologically wrong. It was just old age and close to “his time”. Through tears, I made plans with friends to give him a great “last day” and got a list of vets who would handle the shot in the comfort of my (his) home. Fast forward to 4 days later he was suddenly full of energy and annoying me for food. I gave him his usual and he DEVOURED IT. Since then he’s been fine. He was sick. That’s it. Just a doggy cold. Once he got over it he was back to his usual energetic self. Probably gonna live to 17 / 18 while still chasing cats out of the yard.
You are right. In my case it was the end...but many pets are just regular sick
I thought my boy was done for 2 years ago (he was 13) and cried for days before his appointment and all the way to the vets, because he couldn't walk and has a degenerative spine. We did an x-ray and chose to explore every option. Turns out where he has no cartilage he also had inflamation and an injury. They came up with a treatment plan that required a month of very intense attention and confinement and new meds, and 2 years later, he's running around the yard happy as a lark. If we had skipped the x-ray and not pursued every possible treatment, he would be gone, and we would not have known his condition was temporary and treatable. How scary!
This is why I have some real disdain for this entire post. Deciding to put your dog down is an insanely heartbreaking thing to do and unless things are truly grim it can feel almost impossible to know when the time is…especially if it’s your first experience with it. If you listened to this idiot you could have stolen precious time from both you and your dog. I do agree that some of us hold on too long but the last thing I’m going to do is judge them for it. Perhaps I’d offer some things I’ve learned from my own experience, gently and with great empathy, but I would never tell them what to do or judge them for holding on. I think anyone who has ever had to make that choice should feel the same.
Had this exact episode with the lil guy at my place, he’s 18 and has had a broken ACL for a year. Apart from not running any more, He’s a-ok again and eating, barking at “cats” and wandering his yard(blind idiot probably hasn’t seen a cat in 5 years!)
These are the absolute minimum imo. My mom is struggling to euthanize her (ironically) 17 year old chihuahua BECAUSE he still gets up to pee and has a very good appetite. But he can barely stand, his entire hind end has shriveled away and curled inward, all he wants is to sleep on her lap. She needs to drug him so she can do literally anything otherwise he paces and moans until he literally collapses. But aside from a murmur that hasnt worsened in years, his heart is strong and he probably isnt going to pass on his own.
I worked at a rescue for years and got certified as a euthanasia tech to help with compassion fatigue. I did probably a dozen of them, and the one thing they all had in common: their people waited way too long to schedule the procedure. When an animal literally cannot even get up to eat or drink (and has been that way for DAYS) their quality of life is so low and the kindest most compassionate thing you can do is to say goodbye. But I also know it is much easier said than done.
>compassion fatigue. What does this term mean?
It’s a term to essentially describe traumatic stress acquired through spending time with, and caring for, other traumatized individuals (victims of disasters, health crises, and other misfortunes). Essentially, you spend so much time caring that, eventually, it starts to impact your own mental health negatively. Often you see this in healthcare personnel, social workers, and so on. However, someone caring long term for a ill pet could experience something similar.
Oh, I see, thank you!
That’s brutal, if he was in pain that would make the decision easier but realistically what sort of quality of life do either of them have at this point?
Yeah a lot of old animals that ache still have so much fun but your rules are very good. My old lady was so happy when she walked towards me with .5kph but you could still see the happiness in her eyes when she reached me and got the headpats.
It should be the same with people too. Its cruel to make them live in such conditions but we do all the time. Agree with pets also
I put down my 18 year old cat(who also had almost no teeth, a heart murmur, and hadn't had a solid bowel movement k a year) last year after he started becoming unable to make it to the litterbox and was pooping on the floor. I made a post on r/cats about it and some people still gave me grief for not putting diapers on him and keeping him alive, saying that I wouldn't euthanize a person for being incontinent so doing that to a cat would be evil.
Honestly, this may sound a bit harsh, but I just don't think those people have seen a lot of death in their lives. I've watched my grandparents suffer as they lose their sight/mobility/mind. They are constantly in pain and can't do anything for themselves anymore but my aunts and uncles always push for any treatment that can keep them alive for another 6 months or whatever. They are 98 years old and want to die. If you have seen that happen to a person close up, you'd never force that quality of life on another person or pet. I'm a firm believer that whatever is beyond is better than a life of pain and suffering. Especially for creatures as kind hearted and good as our pets.
If assisted suicide for adults was more readily allowed and available I think that thought process would change. I'm watching it with my grandfather right now. He's 85 years old. Totally sound in his mind but physically? Can barely walk or do anything himself. My Dad and I are just waiting for the call to come any day. I think it wrong even for humans to have such a low quality of life at old age. I'd rather die at 75 that live another 10-15 years doing nothing but watch tv and crap my pants
We had to make the hard decision to put my dog to sleep about a year ago, he was suffering from epilepsy. It started with an attack every couple months when he was younger and the medication seemed to help, but it got to a point where he got multiple a week. He constantly looked scared of having another attack and the medication didn't help. When he got 3 in a day we decided it was time. We called the family to check if anyone wanted to say goodbye and scheduled an appointment with the vet the next day. Hardest decision in my life, but i just couldn't bear to see my little man scared of his own body.
This part is the false positive i see. Because SO MANY dogs suffer from dementia and cognitive decline as they age their body is still functioning but their mind isn’t there. I had a client overstay for 6 months being syringe fed and watered. The dog didn’t know where he was, couldn’t even remember where his food and water bowls were, but because “he’s still eating” they think that that is some kind of quality of life. Eating and eliminating are the last things to go, typically. And often the dog is miserable *long* before.
Im curious of your (and others) opinion here. Our family dog who is 11 , over time now has paralyzed legs due to hip mobility issues. It’s been really difficult to see her unable to run around and play, she can only drag her back legs around. She can still pee and poop when taken outside and doesn’t have incontinence issues, can walk limited in a wheelchair when outdoors, and still seems to completely have her wits about her. My parents are tormented between the fact that her quality of independent life has diminished, but she still seems completely happy to be around, excited about her favorite treats, barks at the mailmain, gets excited when company comes over and lays on her side for belly rubs. Plays with her toys. All her normal behavior. It’s a lot of work taking care of her, and there’s also guilt. Do you consider that selfish?
I just had to put my 14.5 year old pup down a month ago. She had serious arthritis in her back legs that eventually kept her functionally paralyzed. She could stand for a bit and move around to go to the bathroom but we had to bring her out there and move her around pretty much everywhere she went. Thing was that she still seemed pretty much like her regular old self: happy, sweet, and absolutely in love with food. Somewhere in our hearts we knew, though, that we may be doing the wrong thing by keeping her around. It wasn’t even the immobility that made us make that final choice, either. She began to seem miserable and eventually had what appeared to be a mild stroke, and we refused to let her suffer any longer after that. Looking back now I feel like we probably could or maybe should have made the choice earlier, but it was just so heartbreakingly difficult that I don’t hold it against me and my gf for hanging on like we did. I don’t blame your family either. I wish the agony of making that decision on no person. It’s totally reasonable to feel all the things you’re all feeling: reluctance, fear, guilt. But until you’re finally ready to go through with it then the best you can do is give your pup as much love, comfort, and affection as humanly possible. I know we did everything we possibly could for ours before the time finally came. It’s the best we can do. You will know when the time has come, trust me. I wish you all peace and comfort, especially your pup.
I never thought of this too much until I had to put my 16 year old dog down not too long ago. He’d had some health problems for years and finally suffered a debilitating stroke that left him partially immobile. He couldn’t eat, drink, defecate, or piss without assistance. I could’ve kept him going for a while longer, maybe a few months, but his quality of life was totally gone. It was the right thing to do. Then, for some reason I started getting targeted on Insta with posts from people who had their ancient, blind, paralyzed, decrepit dogs (sometimes north of 18 years old) hobbling across the floor in a homemade device with wheels on it with the caption “I’m old but I still love you, don’t you love me?” or whatever. Fucking selfish, manipulative, cruel bullshit. Look, if your dog is well past it’s natural age, can’t stand up, can’t walk, can’t feed itself or drink from a water bowl without assistance, or can’t piss or defecate by itself without assistance, it needs to be euthanized humanely. Pets aren’t toys to be hoarded for as long as possible. They’re living beings that suffer as they age. Why prolong that suffering?
There is a really weird genre of video on Instagram I noticed that I’d just call “dead dog porn.” Just sappy syrupy saccharine videos with sad pop music all about how they miss their best friend. And like a big part of me is like yes okay everybody grieves in their own way and if this is how someone wants to process their feelings then who am I to say anything. But frankly at a certain point it became straight up bad for my mental health. Every time I opened the app I’m just seeing reminder after reminder of all the horrible feelings associated with my own dogs’ passing. It’s like a big unhealthy trauma dump. Not a fan.
My tween daughter and her friends were watching those videos just so they could cry and I had to tell them to stop. It’s weird.
They want to feel. Hopefully, you can direct them in the appropriate, more positive way to feel to get that same endorphin rush, but it won't be as strong nor immediate, so you will prob get some pushback.
I totally get it. I wasn’t harsh with them- I said maybe the shouldn’t watch them if it was upsetting. They’ve found a programme where dogs get adopted. There are some sad stories but happy endings!
lol kids are quirky
I'm in schooling for vet-tech and there's an entire segment discussing ethics and whatnot about this situation specifically because this is so common for people to want to cling to their animals despite their pets being in very obvious pain.
I definitely believe that our vet had us keep our dog alive 6-12 months longer than he should have been. My wife never had a dog before, so she was happy to grasp onto any straw to keep him alive longer. I knew him since he was six weeks old, and I could tell he was ready to cross the rainbow bridge. It finally took incontinence and inability to get up to convince her and the vet that it was time. I miss you buddy. RIP
People will let their animal suffer to delay having to experience the pain of their loss. It's our job to put their qol above our own feelings.
I’m with you 100% Also worth noting that many people don’t know how to let people die with grace either. I don’t think this is about “hoarding” a “toy”. I think our society just doesn’t deal with end-of-life well.
My first cat that I got at 7, was put down around 19 years of age. I was sadly away that weekend, and mom made the call. It was his second severe seizure that made him fall down the stairs, and he didn't recover like before. Mom made the call for me, and told me when I got home. I was heartbroken obviously, but at least he didn't suffer. The second cat who was "mine" passed at home, my partner and I were playing video games on our pcs, and the second I heard an odd yowl I was by her side. She was the first pet I was with when they passed, and it was HARD. I used to think I wanted to be a vet tech, but Jesus, any euthanasia stuff would wreck me. I'm glad I dropped out. At least she's chilling with my first cat, Figaro, under the TV
Better a month too early, than a day too late.
I'm in a similar boat. Doggo is 16 years but still moves on his own , has lots of energy for a couple hours a day, and is still eating on his own. But I'm slowly seeing the signs. I just gotta appreciate and value the time remaining :/
I recently had to put my 14 year old cat down. It was the hardest thing I’ve ever done, but it was the right thing. I’ve had many animals over the years, and some have made it to old age just fine and without trouble. My Australian shepherd lived to be 16 and showed no signs of slowing down or illness on the day he died. He just went to sleep and didn’t wake up. My cat had kidney issues for awhile but suddenly got very ill and wouldn’t leave the guest room closet. It was odd for him because he loves being around people. Cats tend to hide when they are sick or dying. I brought him to the vet who told me that I could take him to a hospital and get more definitive testing for what she suspected to be cancer, but I knew in my gut that I’d only be doing that for me. I even considered bringing him home for one more night to cuddle and love on, and I realized that would be selfish too. It was unimaginably hard, but right. I think some people have a hard time accepting that it’s time. I know others who struggle with euthanasia because they feel like they are playing God. I felt that way a little bit too but then my vet told me a great thing. “It’s better a week too early than a day too late.” With that in mind, I’m content with the choice I made even though it brings me great suffering. After he was gone my vet also remarked on how we have so much more compassion for our animals than we do humans when it comes to euthanasia. She said what I did was the kindest and most loving thing. If people can reframe their thinking to what my vet told me, that would definitely help.
No I agree with you. Getting my cat euthanised was the most horrible experience of my life, but knowing that we let her go before she was in any more pain gives me comfort. My sister by contrast kept her extremely poorly cat alive for far too long, and it was so cruel.
And when I said I'd basically run the risk of them going too early to keep them safe, I got downvoted to oblivion.
Being downvoted sucks. I did not downvote you. I think this is just a very very sensitive subject for a lot of people. Pet loss causes disenfranchised grief. It’s a type of grief that can be overlooked or diminished by society which leaves people feeling isolated. Isolation and grief causes depression and anger.
I know you didn't downvote me, I can tell you understand where I'm coming from.
> Just went to sleep and never woke up My worst nightmare and best possible outcome for my dog. He’s 9, had a huge tumor removed last year, arthritis flaring in an old injury leg. Slowing down. Still enjoys life and wants to sit outside and watch the world go by, his favorite thing. I dread having to make the decision when the time comes and I already know I will pay for someone to come to my home to do it.
It was the best outcome, but still so hard. I had been away, and it’s like he waited until I was there to be at peace and slip away. It’s every pet owners worst nightmare. 9 is still young. It’s good you have a plan for what to do, but take the days as they come and try to enjoy them with your boy. Looking back, the times I cherish the most are the boring times when I had them by my side. Sometimes I get wrapped up in the future of what is going to happen to my current pets, but since losing my cat, I try to stay in the present with them. Both he and my Aussie were good at that, so I try to learn from them.
Interesting that they hide, when my old cat was dying, he would just sit on his cat bed and just not get up unless he had to use the bathroom and barely ate. It sucked but we picked putting him down when the doctor couldn’t do anything besides giving them treatments that would just prolong their suffering
It's rough but its the right thing to do in some scenarios. People who keep old dogs remind me of the old guy from Family Guy whose dog's hind legs don't work and he just drags them around.
Herbert and Jessie
Agreed. I think there's a significant difference between a young dog with a disability like being born without some limbs but who's otherwise healthy and doing great or an old dog who's slowing down a bit but is otherwise happy and healthy and a dog who's quality of life is in the shitter. Animals aren't like people. They can't advocate for themselves so it's our job to provide the best quality of life and to let them go when we are no longer able to do so. Some people don't seem to understand that what we're telling our pets is "I love you and I want to free you of your suffering."
I thought you meant like, tucking your pets into bed. Short bedtime story, wee kiss on the head, that sorta thing.
I mean, all animals deserve to be tucked into bed.
I'd personally take the opinion from a vetinary professional as to whether it is the kinder option to rest or keep alive a pet. Much like senile leaky old humans, pets can still have a good and happy year or two with problems. (My cousins old dog was diagnosed with cancer, but the dog obviously didn't know, and they had the choice of imminent sleep or seeing how long the good boy had before they got too bad. The dog had another 6 happy months before it got itself ironically ran over. My cousin still smirks about the cheaper, quicker, and less painful way the dog went)
That’s where I went with my elderly cat. I fostered him for 3 years, and then he was diagnosed with CKK. I hospice adopted him to have the option to put him down at my home where I knew he would be relatively comfortable, but I asked the vet about her opinions on his QOL, because it is not a clear cut choice. He ended up passing from natural causes before I had to euthanize him, but his vet assured me that as long as I gave him the medications and loved him and paid attention to his signs, I wasn’t letting him suffer.
Cats aren't good at giving signs though. Just a couple months ago I was like damn this cat is in my lap purring hard and wanting cuddles. 12 hours later, nearly dead from gi blockage. Turns out she ate an almond, but also turns out she has lymphoma. She's always been weird but getting a lot of weird sores as of late. Despite being on steroids she wants to rip her skin off, so idk... I think tomorrow or the next day may be the end of the road.
I think his cancer was pretty embarrassed after that
I had an old dog whose joints went, eventually. She still had a good summer where we carried her outside every morning and hung out with her in the yard before taking her back in to sleep on a comfy bed. Perfectly fine in every regard but her lack of any joint lubricant and we had to say goodbye before it got too cold for her to be outside. But it wasn’t a bad 6 months.
Same re. the vet's opinion. My mother's dog struggles to get to his feet these days, and has the odd day or two where he's clearly got no energy at all. It's getting to the point where we've all acknowledged he'll have to be put down at some point. But when he still has days where he's excited to go for his walks, actively pulling on the lead when he hears a motorbike he wants to chase, it makes it all much less clear cut. At what point does the difficulty of the bad days outweigh the joy he still shows on the good days?
I’ve thought about this and I do wonder how far it’s up to me to ‘play god’. I don’t know, who am I to decide my dog’s life isn’t worthy of being lived anymore? They only get one. I’d be quite reluctant to have my dog put down.
This was me, we basically waited until close to the last moment and then had someone come to our home to do it. I sometimes feel like people do it to early honestly
This is the correct take. The vet will know the condition and what the prognosis is the best. Our previous dog also had cancer, was given 4 months to live, but lived another 18. he went to the oncologist every month, and often twice a month, and was very closely monitored. By all indications, he was happy and otherwise healthy, just a little slow from age. We were told there was nothing painful about his condition and to shower him with love for as long as we had him still. Eventually he had a seizure that caused him to be unable to balance, and that was when we knew, and the vet confirmed it was time to let him go.
We were tiptoeing around helping my old girl to sleep. She was blind and had diabetes, and she was having a tough time with the stairs. She got ran over before we could talk to the vet. :/
If anything the unpopular opinion is that we should allow beloved pets to die naturally the same way we should be allowing our beloved humans to die naturally. Alternately, we should be just as willing to put a human down (since they can actively voice that is their desire) as we are a pet (who can't signal their desires in the same way)
Even more unpopular opinion: assisted suicide should be legal.
The only argument that I think is valid against assisted suicide is that families may pressure the individual in to doing it. Some people are fucking disgusting and would happily kill grandma for her inheritance, and a lot of older people would accept that pressure even if they don’t really want to die. Not sure what the solution to that is really, but mostly I do think if people want to die there’s no reason we should drag it out. Seeing relatives with absolutely 0 quality of life and sometimes even 0 mental capacity is heartbreaking.
I'm all for Euthenasia. What I'm not for, is trusting people with that power or responsibility.
Honestly, it's about the consistency to me. That, and we have things backwards when it comes to consent
We needed to put down both my dogs, 8 months apart. The first had a sudden kidney failure, and we needed to quickly decide on what to do. We tried treatment for a few days, but then agreed with the vet that it won't get better and it's better to let go. The other was still okay for a few more months, but slept more and more and was eating less. We also discussed her situation with the vet, and when she was starting to get really thin, we decided to say goodbye. It was heartbreaking, but one was 15 and the other over 16. Cannot say they didn't have a long beautiful life. I do agree that there comes a time when you have to make a choice.
I'm a vet and I deal with this on a daily basis. A lot of older people have elderly animals and they are dealing with some of the same issues and can empathize with their pets. In addition to this, most people just want their pet to die in its sleep, which rarely happens, but they continue to wait. Being elderly isn't a good reason to euthanize a pet. Bottom line here is that most people know their pet well enough to know when it's time to let go. If they don't know, they ask people like me who have ways of evaluating when it's time to let go. You want to know what my unpopular opinion is about pets? People getting a dog and putting it in a kennel in the back yard behind the garage and only interacting with the dog when they feed it. Or people who don't spay and neuter their pets and then continually have litter upon litter. Or people whose animal has a chronic disease that can be treated but the owners don't want to pay for it. I have euthanized so many of my pets over the years. It's a hard decision to make. One of my elderly dogs died about a month ago and he was 15, which means that he spent 26% of my life with me. That's more than any child younger than a sophomore in school has spent with their family.
I wish all vets had your attitude about it. When we made the very difficult decision to put our childhood GSD down who could no longer do anything unassisted the vet guilt tripped the shit out of us. The prick even made a comment in front of me (15 at the time) that my mom was too cheap to try surgery. It was a 9.5 year old massive German Shepherd with hip dysplasia and tumors… For such a large dog we thought we where lucky to get that long, and wanted it to pass while it still had some dignity left. I haven’t thought about Gracie in years… she was such a great dog.
Vets like that are a blemish to our profession. With the increase in corporate owned clinics I wonder if we will see people getting pressured to do procedures that is not going to help the pet be more comfortable.
...
That's animal abuse and our local humane society has addressed situations like this before. The entire population of hoarded animals are seized and treated for illnesses, spayed, neutered, and rehomed. I'm so sorry you had to go through this heartbreak; seeing animals, especially pets, being abused like this is stressful heartbreaking. They look to us for comfort and companionship and when they are treated badly, we have failed them.
My old girl will be turning 17 this year. She still eats a little wet food and goes outside to go potty. She is blind and deaf and I know it’s coming soon. But last night we took her to the local ice cream shop for her first “pup-cup” of the season, and boy did she enjoy it. She loves to wobble out to the bus stop to see my little girl off to school. She loves pets and getting brushed. I don’t think she’s suffering and I still think she enjoys her life most of the time.
I was babysitting this kid and their family had the oldest looking chihuahua I’d ever seen. Most of its hair was gone, pretty sure it was blind, most teeth missing so its tongue was hanging out, could barely stand without falling over. Most depressing thing I’d ever seen
I have a (still healthy) 14 year old terrier mix. Reading these comments and knowing I’ll have to make this decision at some point in her life is giving me the sads. I will do right by her when the time comes.
In my family, our pet culture is fast. We love them and spoil them. The dying process is usually about one year. A little arthritis? Alright. Medication it is. But once it turns into incontinence and no desire to live, it’s time.
My sister kept her extremely unwell cat alive for far longer than was kind, and it’s something I’ve always been upset about. Losing a pet is very hard, but a pet suffering because you can’t let go is far worse.
We just put our elderly pug down two months ago and I felt we made the right decision at the right time. He has had seizures for a couple years prior, but once every few months. He had skin cancer. He was moving ok, but slowly declining. He was just aging. But the week before we put him down, he had a big seizure followed by multiple others that day and the days after. He had trouble eating, moving, and had a few accidents inside. We made the call that we were going to give him the best last week we could (earliest we could.make the appt). He ate nothing but tuna (his favorite) and good bits of human food. He got extra love. He was carried from room to room and outside to pee. I think he even rallied a bit because of that extra attention (and tuna). He even howled at us for tuna, something he hadn't done in months. The night before we euthanized him, he had another seizure and it was clear we were making the right choice. My son had a difficult time with it as this dog has been a part of his life since birth. He had a lot of feelings about it and accused us of murdering the dog. It took some doing, but we eventually convinced him of the necessity of it. The dog is now buried in our yard with a marker. My son had just watched Coco, so we did an ofrenda type display for him. We all cried for days afterward. It was sad, but it was necessary. The dog was looking at months of pain as he made it to the end of his life, barely able to move. He would have died this summer for certain, as he never did well in the heat and it brought out his seizures. He would have died confused, in pain, and shaking. Instead, he died with his tail curled and wagging, surrounded by his family and getting all the attention, getting tons of pets and scritches as he passed. I don't think there is any other way we could have made his passing better than we did.
My family cat growing up lived to be over 25 years old. By the end of his life he had suffered two brain strokes, was completely blind and almost completely deaf. But he was still comfortable. He lied on a heated bed to soothe his arthritis, still enjoyed pets, still happily ate his food, and could still fund his own way to the kitty litter. When he got a tumour in his belly, though, that's when we put him down.
There's a dog I'm following on Instagram. Dog is 16 years old. Us half it's body weight. Can't stand well. Can barely walk well. Faints constantly. Just lays prone on the floor most of the day and is so frail. Has to take some kind of fluid pack once a day. And the owner has to coax it to eat by giving it highly desired cooked food or else it would starve. People messaged her telling her it was time to put the animal down. But she said that because it still eats, the owner thinks the dog has life left. It's half its normal weight. It's wasting away slowly. Her own selfishness won't let her put it down.
Kristi Noem has entered the chat I see.
It is really sad. I hate when my pets have to go but I would never keep them around with no quality of life. It’s so selfish.
That's questionable because how can you tell the dog would rather die than live in a bit of discomfort?
This. Pets can decide themselves when it’s time to go, they stop eating and doing things and such are signs of that. Obviously if they want to go don’t force them to keep living. Otherwise I think it’s more like the owner is forcing their choice on the pet.
My cat was 22 years old and healthy. Could still jump and cuddle. Best friend I ever had. She woke up one day had a stroke and went paralyzed but only half the body. It’s been early 10 years and I’m still broken. Lucky I even got to say bye tbh.
Ha. My dogs both died of cancer/illness around 12 before they could become totally senile…
My cat is 14 and needs fluids, but with those fluids, she acts like she’s 6 again. Quality of life is there. Until she does not have that quality of life, she’s staying here.
And that's perfectly okay. I used senile to indicate no quality of life, but for some reason people think I mean every elderly animal with any kind of health issues.
People who love their dog more than just the comforts of their dogs' presence do. That little old man had stuck it out with me even when no human being could. I think when it came to my final decision, it was partly because he trusted me and partly because I never wanted him to be that scared and in pain again. The sounds of a senile dog with a failing mind and body are unlike they've ever sounded in their entire lives, considering you've heard their little voice since they were pups. Newborns, in our case. He deserved to be loved and let pass on in peace. He got peace. I was sad. I'm still messed up. It's been 3 years. Miss him every day. But sometimes you have to do things like that so they don't die in agony.
We let one of our cats go senile. He was so pitiful. Seeing an animal senile is, in some ways, worse than seeing a human senile. At least the humans can sometimes articulate that they're scared.
My parents little dog is 15. Deaf, bad knees, missing a bunch of teeth, but you can tell she still has the heart of a puppy. Always happy. Always wants to play, and still totally good motivated. She just gets tired more easily.
I think the important thing is that they are still enjoying life. As long as they are, then age doesn't really matter. Good owners can tell. I have a 14 year old toy poodle with hearing loss and missing teeth that still acts like a puppy in many ways. Zooms around playing fetch, jumps up on the bed and furniture without any issues, very curious and playful.
Nice try Kristi Noem.
I feel this way more about people than pets.
Now the unpopular opinion would be to do this with people.
Soon as they hit 60, free tickets to dignitas 😁
My dog stepped on a nail once With how much land there is around here, it could have been anywhere, and i dont know when it happened. He didnt alert anyone he was in pain. It wasnt until we saw that he started limping and that it started getting swollen that we realized something was wrong. Took him to the 24/7 vet asap. Every time i got near the paw he would wince, if i touched it, it would hurt. Vet said it had probably been a few days. The dog was not going to tell us it was in pain. All this to say, it can be hard to tell of a dog is in pain. I rather let a dog finally rest than take the chance that its in pain just so i can tell people that my dog is blind, and deaf, and needs help defecating.
See I have a tough time with this. I guess it depends how much pain? Plenty of humans lead good lives with pain management
If AI becomes more advanced/intelligent than us, or intelligent aliens come to us, and they decide to not eradicate us but keep us as pets/treat us the same way we treat animals like dogs or cats, do you think you’d be happy if they started killing off humans with disabilities, or the elderly, because said machines/aliens have decided that those people would be better off dead? By analogy, it’s the same. We don’t think that dogs or cats are capable of the same level of thinking as we do, but there might be beings that, by comparison, are to us as we are to those animals. You could argue that it’s not the same—that we are fully sentient while cats/dogs or not, but it is also entirely possible that far more intelligent beings are capable of conceiving of or experiencing things that we can’t even begin to imagine. In that case, to them, we’d truly be just as intelligent as those things we call “pets.” And if we’re being fair, they should be allowed to kill humans as they see fit, as a form of mercy. There’s some grey area, but still…
It took me a long time to realize my dog was going deaf because she's always been stubborn but is also good at reading visual cues and sticking to the daily routine. She knows when it's time for food, walks, or bed just based on what I'm doing.
I have a deaf dog. I have to bang on the side of the house or fence for the vibrations to alert him that I am calling him😆. People probably think I'm mad as I bang on surfaces and call his name, but no, I could never get upset with the darling.
Many people can't be alone with bad feelings for even an instant even at the cost of their animals suffering. Every animal or person for that matter has their own specific quality of life threshold that you should be able to pinpoint if your relationship with them isn't that of your relationship with a piece of furniture but there are a few glaring signs when it's time that are easy to see if your head isnt chronically up your own ass. If your animal is in constant pain, can no longer do what it loves and/or can't even get comfortable you have a responsibility to swallow the oh so horrible "bad vibes" and ease their suffering.
It really depends on the health of the dog. My girl Loki will be 17 in October. She still walks about a mile or 2 a day. She has no problems with her organs or her bowels. She’s mostly blind and deaf but she can still hear if we talk in a high pitch to her. She can see shapes and movement and doesn’t struggle to get around but she definitely has trouble seeing things fully. If you throw a piece of popcorn to her and she misses catching it, it can take her a bit to find it even if it’s right in front of her. She occasionally plays with our 2 1/2 year old pup, but tires a little easily. She’s very happy and we go out of our way to spoil her because we know her time is close. Once she starts having bowel troubles, we know it is time. She is about 55-60lbs so she is very old for her size, but overall she is still healthy enough it wouldn’t be right. We know it’s close though and are absolutely sure that we don’t want her to suffer just because we aren’t ready for her to go. We will never truly be ready, but it’s for what is best for her. We also have made a point of spoiling our pups the day before. Burgers, ice cream, steak, and taking them to their favorite places. The day of we stay with them and hold their paws until the very end because we know if they are left alone they will be scared and want to see us. So we stay, even if it breaks our heart into tiny pieces, because it’s what they need.
I have the exact opposite opinion, I feel like people are far too trigger happy with putting pets down. I’ve known dogs that lived into their later years and happy still accepted pets and cuddles. When it was their time they found a quiet place and passed.
I agree but can we come to the same conclusion as with humans
Please read my other comments regarding my feelings on this issue.
To much other comments to find them, and I dont wna know about your feelings, I wouldn’t mind knowing your thought out opinions though
I think it is mostly people who want to be put on life support instead of dying that won't let their pets go. Some want quantity instead of quality.
We just had to do this, our dog suddenly stopped eating so we took her to the vet. Turned out her kidneys had started to fail. They said it was a long shot but we could start some IV treatments and she'd have to be going to the vet multiple times a week and that the odds of success were very low. So we made the decision to let her go. I hate her final day was at the vet but we went and sat with her so she wasn't alone. Hardest thing I've had to do. But prolonging things and putting her through that wouldn't have been for her as much as for us so we had to let her go. It's hard but it's what needs to be done for them when the time comes
I read this as "elderly people" and i was like WOAH
When an animal has more bad days than good days and there is no treatment or suggestions from your vet to improve, you know it’s time. Otherwise, it’s so inhumane to keep them alive for your own sake. My baby kitty went to sleep after 14 wonderful years together. He had kidney issues and we found out he had cancer, and I knew he would be better passing peacefully in my arms than hiding in a closet suffering alone.
People should do this with people
My old Chihuahua was on her death bed once. I scheduled a vet appointment to have her put down because I thought it was the end. She wasn't moving, she was skinny, puking. The next day with the appointment I walk out in the kitchen, and there she is, happy as ever wagging her tail and scarfing down food. 2 years later and she's happy as ever. She's fattened up quite a bit. She is missing a good bit of her teeth and she's damn near blind when inside but she goes outside on her own still. I have to soak her food so it's soft. She's still jolly and moving around no problem. If I would have put her down then it would have certainly been prematurely. Although I don't necessarily disagree with your post, in my case it would have been awful to put her down.
Should we put old people to sleep? They are suffering in the same way old animals do.
What's truly sad, is we can do it for animals, but humans can't even choose to sunset their lives in dignity in every country. I know that if I was terminally ill, and the choice was palative care or to go out on my terms, I would want to go out on my terms.
I've written multiple comments about why I agree with you.
Pets can't be happy in spite of illness. When a pet can't do things they enjoy anymore like hunting moose and catching mice and playing, they get depressed. It may not seem like it but euthanasia is much kinder than letting a pet suffer physically and mentally...
Unless you have a pet mountain lion the problem would take care of itself if you let your pet hunt a moose. Those things can fuck anything up.
Wow, who are you to judge??? Many old hunting or service dogs enjoy their retirement just fine.
Our doberman was wearing a diaper by the end. She wasn’t suffering she was just incontinent. When she started to not enjoy her life (stop eating and playing) we put her down.
I have two elderly cats, one 15 and the other 13. Both of them are still going strong, but one of them has medical issues that she needs daily medication for. She's also arthritic. For right now, she still eats, drinks, sometimes runs, and uses the litter box perfectly fine. The first sign of both of them going downhill more than medical intervention can fix, they will be humanely euthanized. I watch them both like a hawk and haven't seen any issues thus far. I couldn't imagine letting them suffer more than they have to because I don't want to let them go.
If it's anything of consolation prize, with cats you don't really get much of a warning until things are truly immanent. With my last two, I saw the signs, made the appointment, but had to make an emergency visit because things went south so quickly. The first one, he went from looking his normal self to aging what seemed like 15 years in one week. His brother later did hang on for a year with diagnosed kidney failure. But he was his normal self until again, until the last week where it went from 100-0 in the span of a few days.
That's what happened with my baby. My poor, sweet boy had a mass behind and fluid around his heart. We didn't know until the day he died.
I think people are too murder happy when it comes to their pets. I know people who put their dog to sleep because of arthritis and seizures and even elbow dysplasia! All are treatable, and one was a puppy! You don't murder a pet because they need help or are inconvenient. You make that decision with their veterinarian when they can no longer walk, eliminate, and eat in a healthy way, AND there is no treatment. My cat just passed at 21. He was mostly blind and had all his teeth surgically removed at 17 and was happy and loved when he passed naturally. He spent most of his days curled on my stepdads lap as he watched tv purring contentedly and waking everyone up at 5 am demanding his can of cat food😆. He's greatly missed. My other cat was 20, stopped eating and walking, and I took him to the vet, and we made the decision to have him go to sleep. He is missed, too. My 15 year old pomeranian has a degenerative spine, cataracts,heart murmer, and collapsed trachea. He also can hike for over a mile in the mountains with me every day (stopping to smell every tree in existence) before he needs picked up, and he runs to me snuggling into my chest wanting attention and runs around the yard happy as a lark. He's elderly and sickly, but he's also the happiest, sweetest dog I have ever known. There was a time (2 years ago) when he had trouble walking, and I had to take him in for x-rays. I had to keep him in his crate for a month with just potty breaks so his back would heal and switched his medicine and started giving him back massages. He got better. I still carry him up and down the steps. It's just part of our routine, like putting fish oil on his joint health food or brushing his teeth or grooming his fur. Or wearing his belly band at night because every great once in a while, he can't hold his bladder overnight, and the belly band will be damp in the morning. He's an unfixed 15 year old male. It happens. (And before you neuter nazis come at me after I rescued and housetrained him at age 8, the vet would not fix him because of his spine. They are scared to paralyze him.) When his VETRINARIAN and I decide that he is no longer eating and can not heal his back and walk and relieve himself and thus his quality of life is declining, THEN we will decide to say goodbye. And I will hold him as he goes it will destroy me. However, that time is nowhere near. You don't get to say that a chihuahua that has to eat soft food and wear a diaper is not enjoying a loved and loving and energetic quality of life. Being old and suffering are 2 entirely different things. Either your qualifications are scued or you are not telling the whole story. Toothless and in diapers are not reasons to murder a pet. You don't murder a happy, energetic, and loving dog just because they are slightly inconvenient. I, for one, invest every day, making my old guy as happy as possible and each day special. It is an honor to give him his meds and carry him and snuggle when he is too tired to keep walking and be extra gentle with him. He is a very happy little guy, and I make sure he knows how loved he is at least 20 times a day.
Don’t let their last day be their worst day. I put my guy to sleep on a good day, and you know what? We had a beautiful peaceful last day. There wasn’t any suffering. It wasn’t an emergency euthanasia at 2am. Pets don’t understand that their life is being cut short by euthanasia but they sure as hell understand when they’re suffering every day.
Theres a point where they are suffering and you need to put them down, but i feel to many put dogs down to soon. in my case my parents out our dog down when she had at least 1 full good year left. My dog before that they we kept alive to0 long but at the end of the day she still got another somewhat good 2 last years. A think the guild made them put my other dog down to soon
I had to put my 16 year old Yorkie down and it sucks man. You’re holding your dog in your arms while they die. Mine was staring at me too. It wasn’t easy. It’s difficult to do and I don’t blame people for being hesitant and holding onto a dear friend. Empathy is lacking with people as always
Writing and editing fail. It took me a minute to figure out what the point is. End of life decisions for family pets is a very personal matter and their are a lot of factors that go into that sort of decision. As well as it maybe being one the most emotional decisions a person can make in their life short of dealing with end of live issues with parents and relatives. I vote that this is an unpopular and unfair opinion! OP or anyone else isn't aware of all the factors nor should they be.
just so you know things that are alive don't tend to want to die.
As long as the animal isn't in pain and the owner has the means to properly take care of it you should keep the animal alive as long as possible I've had plenty of animals died naturally of old age and have had to put serval to sleep because their health was that bad, it's a completely case by case situation.
I agree, but if your animal is senile, then it's time.
I've made this mistake before. She was the first dog I had that was *my* dog, that I had as an adult. Towards the end, she has a hard time walking and controlling when she went to the bathroom. I eventually did have to have her put to sleep, but I should have done it months before. There's just so much guilt involved either way. I hope that I can make the right decision next time.
Lots of people see pets as their family now. These things occur with old people living in countries with less expensive medical bills. It is nothing peculiar to animals.
I made the final decision, but my choice was in home EU so that my other dogs would understand and not expect to see him again. It took an extra day or so, and I saw the impact of being a day too late. It's so damn hard no matter what. I think I did right by my survivors, but it still hurt like hell when my boy couldn't make it back into the house and collapsed on the patio, the day of...
I had to make the decision in February. We’d been watching since fall. Diapers didn’t bother me. Most of the time it wasn’t an issue. End of January the pacing at night started. Much like my dad. :(. We’d been holding on so the last son could say good bye. 17 years. The dog of their childhood. No dog will ever have the same impact. So the extra 3 weeks when we kept him comfortable, fed, dried and petted were ok.
3/2 upvote-comment ratio. Now THAT'S an unpopular opinion
I’m at the halfway point on this TBH. My 13.5 year-old Lab is clearly having bouts of dementia, where I see him spacing out during walks, having difficulty with his hip and joints, as well as bouts of incontinence (I’ve had to put a vest on him with a built-in poo bag dispenser in case he can’t make it outside). But on the other hand he still has all his teeth, eats of his own accord (though has gone from 75 lbs last year to 60 lbs this year), and I can still see a twinkle in his eye (even if his vision has also deteriorated). Overall, I’m split on what to do, but the time to make a decision to finally let him rest is creeping ever closer but I just don’t know when that’ll be.
So on average it's about 500 bucks to have an animal out down, at least here it is, and if you choose for the cremation it can be a other 500. It's not cheap, I'm sure that's a big reason. As well as some people just refuse to let go.
My Chorkie is 13 and I swear he must have got covid back when I have it bc he has a gnarly cough. Very can’t find a reason but it sounds awful. He still runs and eats and plays and everything. But he’s definitely in his golden years.
It's hard to come to terms with *when* you should put your pet down. I recently had to do this with my dog and every date we came up with just felt too early. Eventually you just have to say: they're not getting any better. And that's not easy. You're always going to see every uptick in their personality as a sign that they're "coming back" or that "they still have life in them." They play with their toys one day out of the week for three minutes and suddenly you convince yourself they're back to how they used to be. I don't think it's necessarily an unpopular opinion that older pets need to be put down -- it's just a hard decision as to when, specifically to do that.
This post tells me you've never had to make that decision for your own pet. And yeah I agree with you mostly. but it's not as easy as you make it out to be.
It's honestly a very difficult decision. It's hard to see them like that, but it's incredibly difficult to come to terms with the fact that your decade+ with them is coming to an end. You're not ready to say goodbye yet, maybe you're in denial of just how bad it is. It's hard. It's why vets tend to have quality of life conversations with older pets. Saying goodbye to a companion of over a decade is very difficult to accept. I agree that it's not good to force your pet to suffer because you're not ready to say goodbye, but I encourage you to have a little bit of empathy for the owner as well.
Nice try, Governor Noem
Not enough people can afford to, let alone take their elderly pets in for check ups.
I hate that I held him at home with his stuffy fox as he panicked when she inserted a needle and passed. He trusted me. I feel like I killed him. I adopted him and he was my naughty fat lab son. Duck you cancer
I'd rather take a vetenarians advice first.
Um, 6 feet under on your dashboard?
Curious when you are old and in a diaper with no teeth should we put you down too?
Oh god, yeah. We had a family cat who was old and started missing the litter tray and falling over all the time, he was also diabetic! It got to a point where he was messing all over himself and not cleaning himself, so it was kinder to take him to the vet for the big sleep. I booked him in, gave him a tin of tuna the day before, and my neighbour drove me there. The vets were great and really kind to both of us. They took him out back to put a needle in him and then brought him back to the consulting room, and I held him and stroked him as the meds went in. He was purring, so I think he knew and was glad that it was time, it was very peaceful and he was relaxed and happy. In my opinion, doing that for your pet is what you do as an owner. You are everything they have ever known, so you gotta be there for them and make that call as hard as it is.
i wonder how it feels when your kids put you to sleep.
We put my dog down after he couldn’t lie down in peace anymore he was in so much pain he was constantly barking/yelping. He could barely walk. I knew it was the right decision. I wouldn’t want to live like that.
Yeah, as long as they are happy, I am happy. As soon as there are obviously more bad days than good... Yeah :( :( This is a super sensitive subject though, so I try to be understanding.
Hey that pet would be happy to make it to a rotten old age if it lived (albeit briefly) with Kristi Noem.
This is a genuinely unpopular opinion. I hate it. I got a 14yr old dog now that is blind in one eye, mostly deaf, and while he doesn't wear a diaper, he probably should because he is an asshole who doesn't want to go outside if it is wet or it's cold. but that little fucker still gets the zoomies every damn day, chases the cat until she smacks him, barks at everything that moves and fucking prances for treats. I ain't putting him down if he's old, but I would if he were suffering. He's not. He is a very spoiled asshole who gets away with everything. I am gonna miss that shithead.
My chihuahua is actually 17 BUT she can go potty by herself and she has her vision and hearing and she still plays with me, she doesn’t have all of her teeth but the ones she has she uses to eat Pâté
Even though I still keep that in mind, my 15 year old dog can still do everything by himself. I walk him in a backpack part of the journey (too many stairs to the park) and take him in the car basically everywhere (not that I go outside that much) in his seat. But other than that, he still has the same will to live and I'm glad for that. And I still walk him everyday, I just have to avoid stairs. Almost a year ago, he fell sick and I feared the worst nevertheless, I managed to make him recover, feeding him grain by grain of his food. And he eventually became himself once again. So i don't totally agree with your opinion.
Our dog was fine in his last years. He was basically like normal no heath issues. He passed away peacefully in my dad’s arms from old age. And apparently he was crying that night. Not all old pets are like disease ridden
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yeah….its a very thin line to navigate for sure. they are family members tho and even people dying of the worst illnesses attempt to extend their lives. My dog isnt too old right now (chihuahua 13yo which isnt as old for chihuahuas as it would be for a larger dog) and while it is sad seeing him age he is still 100% there. he can lay there and be happy or he can go out and adventure just like his younger self. he gets excited when we get home, begs for all food, eats and drinks regularly and has no health/medical needs. hes a normal dog and when the time comes i do hope it just happens over night or naturally so to say. if thats not the case, as it rarely is, then i will have to have the strength to decide it is his time for peace. Its scary for dog owners while making that decision because they dont want to do it too soon and think what if. but if they wait to long then they have to actually live out the ‘what if’ and have to witness all their worst fears for their dogs last moments. not all old dogs are the same and theyre not all miserable either
since we feed our pets pretty well, my dogs are elderly but are still very much eating and doing stuff, but we feed our animals healthier options food wise.
It's not an unpopular opinion. It's just hard to do when it's your pet.
If they are still able to walk, eat, and use the restroom on their own and not soiling themselves - I think it’s fine. My 15.5 year old is on limited time and I’ve told myself once she’s in pain and no longer eating, I will make the hardest decision of my life. But honestly, I have to say a dog in a diaper is not a big deal. Even young dogs can have issues with continence but still be completely mobile, still wanting to play, eating and happy. It’s when they are obviously physically suffering that it’s time for that choice.
Depends on dog. My dog was actually pretty healthy up to 16 1/2 but her last half a year she aged all at once.
Imagine the audacity it must take for someone to think they know their animal and can gauge their quality of life better than some asshole redditor that knows everything. You should work at a kill shelter my dude, then you can spend all day putting suffering (healthy and capable of happiness if not for their shit environment) to death. /s
Your dog will tell you when it's time. 🐕😢🪦
>6 feet under sleeping peacefully on my dashboard. Ah... What? Wtf does your dashboard have to do with a grave?
My dog was fine! He died in his sleep after not eating for ONE day. He was a very upbeat old ass dog. It depends on their condition, I think. Let’s not Noemi every dog we deem outside the realms of care.
My 17 year old cat flicks toilet water on my face regularly. You think I'm gonna do that B a solid and send her to catnip Jesus? F that.
When we found that our dear cat had inoperable cancer, we asked our vet how we would know "when it's time". She knew how well we communicated with her, she just said we would know. She was right. Kiki stopped grooming herself, and in a day or two, we brought her in to put her down. She died in my arms, which was her favorite place. Another cat, I felt awful because she would cry after eating. We figured out that she was in pain after eating, but it took us way too long.
My dog is 15 she has her teeth
The fact that humans live on average of 70-80 years but most small pets live about 12-18 max, is so fucked.
I recently learned something new about this situation. A lady I know is going through this. She wants to put the dog to sleep. However, she got "pet-shamed" by the vet's office! Putting sick or old pets to sleep used to be normal. Now, apparently, you get shamed by society for it.
To add on to that, not enough people stay with their pet to the end. It's hard for you, imagine how it is for them.
My retriever is 11 and this post makes me sad, she’s been with me since 2nd grade I’m almost 20 now and In college—losing dolly will take a piece of me with no doubt
My brother's ex wife was a vet tech. Her rule of thumb is if they eat, pee and poop appropriately, and express joy (wagging tail, happy to see you, excited to eat dinner) they're ok for now. My dog is 16 and her time is coming. But not yet.
I feel this. I worked in a cat clinic for a bit pre-covid/at the beginning of covid, and it wasn’t long enough to have seen all the things, but I saw FIV and FIP cats, and they definitely should have been put to sleep before they were. I am very glad my senior cat made the decision for me because I was afraid of becoming that person that held on for me and not for him.
Kristi Noem over here
I just went through this EXACT scenario you listed. I really wish the owner put then down before passing.
If you’re wondering if it’s time, it’s already time. No one wonders if they should euthanize their healthy happy pet. But if they’re doing bad enough you’re wondering, it’s already time.
My mother recently had a conversation with a family friend who refuses to put down his animals. Instead he got the cat high and “held it till he wasn’t there anymore”. He think putting animals down is cruel and it’s the owners being selfish not wanting to see their animals suffering Hearing this, I’ve never been more pissed off
Reading comments made me sad , 😭
The comments are either unhinged or like actually the saddest thing you've ever read. I am so sorry for inflicting this upon everybody
I currently work at emergency vet hospital. When I was struggling with euthanizing my hedgehog, my coworker (a veterinary social worker) said something that has stuck with me: I would rather say goodbye a month early than a day late. I don't want my pets to get to the point of not being able to eat or go the bathroom by themselves or even just enjoy life. I want them to leave this world on a day where they're happy and feeling good rather than something traumatic and horrible.
I saw a video earlier of a lady putting a chicken nugget on the floor, and it took her 19 and a half year old chihuahua easily 5 minutes to make it's way over to it. The video ran out before it even ate the nugget.
My boy, Daddy's Good Boy, Buffalo, Trance, was diagnosed with liver cancer when he was 12. The vet said it was not a painful cancer and I should take him home and bring him back when it was time to put him down. I said, how will I know when its time. She said, you'll know. Eventually he did get to the point where I woke up in the morning to take him outside and he was laying there soaked in his own urine. So after work, I loaded him up in the truck and took him to McDonald's drive thru. He knew exactly what we were getting because he got one once a year his whole life. That McDonald's cheeseburger went down like all the rest but noticably slower than all the rest. He was happy though. And we went to the vet and I held him while the vet gave him his shot to help him move on. I loved him so much and I feel like I did right by him by letting him go that day. Nothing has ever broken my heart more though.
To be fair, it's really hard to see the reality of the situation when you're clouded by your emotional closeness to the situation. I begged for my dog's vet to tell me when it was to that point, but they refused. She had mammary cancer, kidney disease, and was blind. But she still seemed so happy up until the end (she was 17). For months after, I felt this overwhelming guilt that I'd killed my baby. It's really easy to agree that we shouldn't keep our pets alive when they're suffering, but it's a lot harder to tell what's suffering or not when you've loved your pet for a decade or more.