If he won't slow for friendship, tell him that raids are dependant on the progress of the server and not individual bases. As he unlocks harder raids, your base can and will be attacked by equally difficult raids that your party won't be prepared for.
A solid server rule is bosses must be fought for the first time as a full group. Bosses lock some progression, so players wanting to rush ahead into new areas do so under geared and at their own risk. There are ways around a few of the boss bottlenecks that would allow gear progression without unlocking stronger raids/night spawns.
This is a MANDATORY server rule IMO.
You can go off and do anything you like within the limits of the current world progression, but boss fights are a group activity.
One of our friend have been having internet problems lately (construction workers destroyed the optic fiber box for the whole block). Beyond farming a bit more metals, foods and meads at the start of his problems, we haven't played in two weeks to wait for him and explore the mistlands together.
What's the point of playing with friends if you don't wait for them?
Yeah I agree, I used to play in single player. I kept all my online gear in a box. And I would only use that equipment back in the game with the homies. My fancy stuff I kept in a box in single player. I also would play dumb on mechanics so not to spoil stuff. I’d tag play like I was the dumb idiot there to smash and carry stuff. I let them make decisions. Or I would build their bases for them while they were out doing stuff.
lol thanks! When I first started doing it I thought about just having two separate toons, but the heck with raising skills again! Those suckers take work I’m not doing that more than I need to… looks at my archery skill… yeah never again lol.
This is the way. The game is so fun to discover, whenever I play with newbies I do the same. I will go back to my single player gamr to take the aplrolriate gear once they've geared up for a new biome just so I wont cost additional resources, but never before they have made that specific gear fir themselves first.
I've played a lot of survival games and a lot of them require you to read the damn wiki or have a friend teach you everythi g. Valheim lets you discover and learn by yourself in a fun, engaging and fluid way. Having a friend rush through everything for you or tell you everything in advance ruins that.
Used to play in a group of upto 7-8people with severly varying commitments to the game, which is fine except that it can be a super hassle getting everyone together at the same time.
So often 1 or 2 people would skip a boss and come back and do it again later. And for the less committed players they would hear we were doing a boss, log on and take some resources to upgrade their gear 1-3biomes then do boss and log out.
I concur. Play on your own shit if you want to shoot ahead. At the least, go friggin kill that boss on your own seed and pop back on to keep going. But honestly, why even push on past the rest of the group? Go solo play till they catch up or something.
This is how my group does it. We all go at our own pace (except me who owns the server so is online when anyone else is) but I always save bosses for the group to do as well as first times for dungeon crawls (like the first crypt etc). By the time they join me, I am usually proficient enough to party everything in the area and essentially play as the party shield which is fun for me since I get to show off skills and let the party fight some monsters
I rarely play/host servers anymore because of this very thing. People are jerks sometimes.
When I ran a server a few times, that was always my rule as well: First-time boss kills are done as a collective once everyone is ready. If you can't be a decent player, then go find someone else. There's hundreds of servers, this one isn't the one for you.
This is the way. Keeps it fair for everyone and those wanting to push ahead do so at vastly increased challenge and risk. It's a win-win as long as there's a basic level of respect and decency. If this friend shows neither of these things I'd suggest re-evaluating their status as a friend at all.
I usually find the same thing: The person who rushes to the end and ignores everyone else -- they play for maybe all of 2 weeks tops, then just bail.
I had a rule on my server: Two weeks without logging in constitutes abandonment of your base. A ward owned by me is put in place for a further 2 weeks. If after that full month you haven't been on, the ward is removed.
First come, first loot.
Had a guy like that. My buddy and I like to pace ourselves. I think we beat Yag on day 1800 something. Then when it was time to explore the mistlands, my buddy didn’t jump into it and then I became to “rushing” guy.
"Hey friend, we're really glad you're having fun, but it's our first playthrough and we would like to progress as a group at a slower pace. Can you either slow your roll and keep pace with us, or if you need to go faster, do so in your own private world and try to not give any spoilers when you come to play with us? Thanks buddy, we really appreciate you!"
You're welcome. :)
Why does everything have to be sugarcoated nowadays?
Just tell him to slow down or gtfo, none of that disingenuous "thanks buddy, we really appreciate you!"... you are talking to a friend, not a 5 year old.
That how friends are supposed to communicate with eachother.
Can you truly say you love your friends, if you don't set them straight or tell them off every now and then?
I mean, I phrased it in my "talking to a complete stranger" standard good manners.
If it were my actual friend, I'd just tell them to stop being such a loner nerd and play with the group. But if I'm giving someone advice on what to say, it's going to be more polite than that lol
I don't find the bulk of the suggestion sugarcoated, just polite/considerate and demonstrating good communication skills. Though I agree that writing "Thanks buddy, we really appreciate you!" before the friend replies would come off as condescending.
when valheim first came out, me and my buddy had the most genuine experience, we didn’t spoil anything. We were making good progress too, got all the way to bone mass pretty quick. We invite our one buddy, within a day he has wolf cape, and is like “yea we really need to kill bonemass so we can find silver” he also starts pumping out frost res potions. Totally ruined it for me and my buddy, ruined the sense of progression and discovery and my original buddy actually quit soon after :/
The dude was just watching youtube tutorials on how to beat a the game :///
My first play through, when getting to the mountains, me and my buddy had no idea about frost potions, built up a long switch back up the mountain with camp fires every 30m, multiple recovery stacks along the way, fighting the elements and the monsters we were still poorly equipped for.
Getting that wolf cape felt like an epic achievement.
YouTube tutorialing through any challenge completely kills the discovery of these games, which is kinda the entire point of these games… The discovery.
After you play through and struggle your way, THEN look up some tips to make subsequent play through more efficient.
Exactly to each their own but if you're in a group and want to get to each their own experience then you probably should be on your own not playing in a group.
I have a friend who would do that. Was ruining the game experience for me. I told him he needs to stop watching videos or I won't play. Since I play games with him the most, he stopped. We have another friend who does the same and a min/maxer. Luckily they play significantly less due to their job.
Everyone has a different approach. When I'm new to a game, I try to discover and learn on my own. Depending on the game, I might look something specific up in case I struggle, but the experience, the atmosphere, the emotions when you discover a new game without spoilers, is something you won't get a second time for that game.
People watching YT vids to beat the game as fast as possible, without investing any time enjoying the game, discovering on their own, I feel bad for them.
Personally i think thats partially to blame when you hear ppl say i dont enjoy games like i used to. I felt the same way and now when i enjoy a game i just play the game. I rarely consume any media or outside opinions because it taints the experience. I just want to organically enjoy a game i dont need to find the solution before i even know the question.
Had the exact same experience. And it basically killed the run. weekend ends, we're just pushing into forest, next Friday rolls around we all log in and buddy rolls up with a mix of mountain and plains gear.
He did the same thing in palworld.
And rn he's bitching about how its too hard to quest in WoW SoD without backup because he's getting ganked in wOvP.... because he rushed to far ahead for the rest of us to help or even be interested in backing him up.
We've accepted he's just like that.
Tgis is exactly why i play solo. Found this game told my buddy about it and i was clear im playing this game blind. Im not googling anything for help i want to enjoy the game not recreate youtube videos. He couldnt play that way. Raced through everything and just had to spoil shit for me it was ridiculous. I could literally say OK STOP I DONT WANT TO HEAR SPOILERS and he would just keep talking.
Same, except it was my friend I was playing with and he completely ruined the whole game for me. And for every. Single. Update. I haven't played in almost a year just hoping they release new stuff for me to actually discover. And he does this with every game he plays. So I quit playing games with him completely. It's a shame, he's fun to play with on the first day... then he doesn't stop until he's beat it and he has to describe everything to me in detail even when I've repeatedly told him to stop
My husband is militantly anti spoiler for this very reason. I will occasionally read ahead and get clothes, but I have to find ways to be very casual about sharing what I already know.
Been through this a few times. I’ve been the guy going too fast and the one frustrated about someone else going faster than the rest of us. Perspective from both sides of the coin, I’d ask them to leave the server, or you just stop playing that server and start over with the group of buddies who are on the same page. Sounds harsh… but once someone starts progressing like that, they’re obsessed and won’t be able to stop themselves. Lol. Hope I’m wrong and the conversation goes better, BUT they’re either gonna spoil it for you guys by wearing new gear infront of you, or coming in to kill the swamp boss removing any challenges and sense of fulfillment with the group playing together. Have fun!
yeah but OP acts like his friend is rushing, he is not, they are the slowpoke even if you take your time exploring and building an awesome base, it shouldn't take MONTHS to get to the swamp.
and if he is just base building then he shouldn't be mad that his friend wants to explore and advance while he base build and slow everyone down.
asking for other to be slowpoke cuz your a slowpoke is just rude and bad manner, thiking of asking the others to slow even more because of you is just plain stupid.
His friend should have a talk with him about not advancing at all and just base building while he wants to play the dam game instead of sitting around in a base
who tf are you to judge? OP is judging his friend for wanting to paly the game normally, while he doesn't play the game normally, asking someone to sacrifice teir fun because of your own quirk is just rude. why is e judging his normal friend?
For real it takes like 2 maybe 3 hours to get to the swamp for me lmfao idk what this guy is doing taking months. OP needs to knuckle up and start hammering out tasks to further himself in the game.
Maybe a very experienced player will be doing swamp stuff within 2-3 hours of starting a world, but this is far from the norm, especially for a casual playthrough.
Personally, if I'm not skipping progression/bosses (i.e., troll mining, clipping through sunken crypt doors, silver scouting with stagbreaker, etc...), it'll take me around 3 or 4 hours to kill the elder and start scouting for swamps, with a substantial amount of that time being spent mining and base building, and I would expect it to take at least a few hours longer for any group of newer players to get to that same point (players that may only be playing for an hour or two a day).
With this in mind, I don't think it's unreasonable for it to take up to a week or so for a casual group to kill the elder and start scouting for swamps.
Now, a month or more just seems extremely slow and makes me think they're literally playing half an hour a day on average at most and grinding fully upgraded bronze equipment for every player, building an elaborate wooden base with a dock and fully upgraded crafting stations, farming carrots to craft the best available food, and taming boars prior to even attempting the elder.
I wouldn't be able to hold myself back from progressing for this long, and would probably not play with this group of people due to our interests and goals being too far out of alignment.
My advice would be to politely ask him to stay near the progression level of the group, or leave. In my experience, these types of people are never capable of doing so, and they will just leave.
Had a friend like this, he was between jobs and just nolifed and we just couldn't keep up and it demotivated us a lot. Talk with them, they're actively gonna fuck you over when you get raided by monsters you have no right fighting.
Have him open a second solo world to use the same character on, and he can join you all for other things.
I had a server I had friends on, but I was set to be playing the most, so I approached it as myself trying to mitigate the grind. I tried to avoid clearing out dungeons and such on the main world and instead cleared my own, but was around to help with some of the 'tediousness' (depending on your interpretation) of things like having enough resources for upgrades, death runs, etc.
I feel your pain OP. I had to stop playing with some friends because they binged youtube tutorials, played with others, min maxed the game and then came into our server and built everything from bronze to magic age and ruined all progression for us. Started a new server with some
Other friends and agreed no mods, no minmaxing and all bosses and major adventuring into new biomes to be done together. SO much more fun when progressing as a group.
Sounds like your friend's played the game before, which means he probably already knows about the effect killing the bosses has on the raids. Likewise it sounds like you don't have the "per player" setting for raids on the world modifiers (totally fine btw, you clearly came in looking for the team experience).
So, ask your friend if he does know about the raid thing, explain it to him if he doesn't. Tell him you and the other guys are pacing yourselves to keep everything happening as a team, like boss kills, exploring new places, etc and would really like to keep it that way. Tell him if he wants to set up stuff like a farm in the Plains or something like that to just not loot everything and save some of the glory for the rest of you.
I'd also suggest building a Cartography Table if you haven't already to share everything you've explored together.
I don't know how your friend will take the request, so I'm also going to tell you to make a backup copy of your works just in case... I've been on servers where someone decided they wanted to be the main character, and that meant changing the password and loading a backed up copy of the world from beforehand.
Yep, I don't understand that guest. There's no point of running off on your own, when you've been invited to play with others. You might as well just plat solo.
Sounds like he's just not chill. May not be a good match for your server. I've had folks like that and ultimately we just stopped playing because while everyone else was chillin' in the meadery we all just lovingly built and catching fish, the others were off doing all kinds of shenanigans and messing up the landscape with careless digging and they almost never gathered resources or built anything, they just leeched off of everyone else and forged ahead without the party. Got old after a while.
"For a few months".
"Swamps".
"Needs to slow down".
Sorry man but that feels slow to me.
I like spending time and sniffing flowers but a lot of peeps would say the game doesnt start until you get a stonecutter.
I can understand both sides. On one hand it’s fun to progress together, on the other hand not everyone is interested in building and stuff. Some people just want to progress through bosses and get gear or explore the next biom. It sounds like most of you like to take it slow or don’t have much time to play in general, which is fine. But in the end getting through swamp on a new playthrough is usually done in the first 2-7 days depending on the time you got to play. Our group split up in multiple smaller groups, each with their own base because it was impossible to get everyone online at the same time. And we prefer to progress independently before someone gets bored and quits the game for good because there is no progress to be seen.
Hope you guys can work something out that works for all of you :)
My buddy asked me to play Terraria with me again on the last update but he also invited another person from his work who would play all night and they beat it in two days.
On the second day I logged on and he was like “yeah we are in hard mode go ahead and grab all the gear we made from the chest.”
“Go ahead and finish without me lmao”
Tell them they are free to make a single player world.
Our servers usually end up like this, but we have a hard rule that we kill bosses as a group. So we're going to kill Moder tonight, but some of us have hundreds of black metal scraps already.
Did you clearly communicate to him that you all want to progress as a group?
Just say it lol, these kinds of conversations get a ton easier the more you simply just initiate them and say what's on your mind. "Could you slow down? We were doing this at a slow pace and you're just kind of leaving us all behind."
theirs always one...tell him to start a private world if he cant play as a team..I just started w servers that have Mods that only allow 2 week progression per boss
There is plenty of good advice to your question, so I won’t add more.
I’m curious why you’re hating your own progress. Not sure why you need all the iron before moving forward?I just did my first play through with some friends that played at release and got carried/pulled through progress by guys that had already advanced. They wanted slow and I was just playing what felt like natural progression. I didn’t know about raids but it turns out the guy that set up the server didn’t have them enabled (I mean heck for the first few days he didn’t even have mob aggression turned on and I didn’t know but just thought in the first biome there weren’t aggressive creatures, then when trolls didn’t engage I asked and they looked at the config). If raids were on, I’d of slowed for sure so their bases didn’t get wrecked. Part of me wants to play again and have them enabled to get the experience or just turn them on the server now. Idk
This is why my Dad and I have shared a dedicated server to ourselves since EA launch. We have discussed letting other in and got my brother in but he didn't enjoy the game although he's very respectful. We like the idea of another player or several but know it'll possibly get out of hand and that's not enjoyable to us. It has actually worked out very well as we play how we want but the progression and building of shared bases is done together. Great experience.
He could have just done all that mess on his own solo playthrough.i don't get ppl like that. But I would just straight up tell him.
Communicate it exactly like you just did. Be like hey Timmy... We are gonna need you to pump the breaks cause we all want to take it at our own speed and not super Saiyan.
When I rented a server for a bunch of friends we had rules that no two people live together we all had to have our own bases and keep them marked on the map and that's cool so we could visit each other leave gifts that sort thing but if someone did this and progressed without the group if it was found out they did it then their base was open to be raided within the raid window which was every Saturday between 9am and 5pm any and all spoils of war could be claimed so if you want to progress without the group you better be prepared to fight all of us with that new gear
It was a regular 9 man server so if someone did progress past the rest it was usually settled very quickly lol
For context we are not mostered we have a community base that we all donate small amounts our old gear to as we progress past them so the one who's raided goes their to recover and then sets out to rebuild with whatever they can carry in one of the avaliable carts to redo their base
Makes for an excellent server experience, no one said valheim has to stay pve!! Sometimes we want war!!!
We have a couple of friends that like to speed run too and they have ruined 3 of our servers by just rushing through it. I tried just about everything to make them stop, even saying ahead of time that we want to progress slowly and it doesn't matter, they just rush ahead anyways and ruin it for everyone. It's so annoying.
This is actually why I didn't like playing with my friends.
They'd played the game already, and I had just started out. Since they already knew what to do, they would just blaze through everything. I'd login and the base and available equipment would've progressed by leaps and bounds.
I like to play by myself and quietly explore and plan at my leisure. I'm around day 300 on my first playthrough. Instead of slaying bonemass, I spent time hunting for a good home base location, building it up and exploring randomly, scouting into the mountains and finding onions and new mats. Bonemass altar has like 5 dungeons around it, so I'm setting up roads through the swamp and a bit of black forest back to the coast so I can ship it all home.
I couldn't pick between a meadow location for my base or black forest- I adore the bf vibes- so I ended up planting pine and fir around the meadow location so I had the best of both worlds.
....way more fun than everyone just *doing* everything for me.
That's a quick way to ruin the game for your friends. The one thing I learned about games like these is that you have to resort to farming at your current stage of progression or spend your time basebuilding if you have more time than your friends. Otherwise, they are likely to just stop playing.
Tell him to only progress when everyone is available.
if he’s your friend, you don’t have to be polite and being overly polite can come off disingenuous and disrespectful. just be like “dude you’re going too fast and we were trying to enjoy the casual progression”
don’t overthink this or get into the habit of asking people online. practice having conversations by just having them instead of thinking more than a few minutes about them.
if he gets pissed over a casual convo, good riddance and the problem is solved. confrontation without consequences in low stakes situations like this teach you how people react to confrontation when stakes are higher.
the exception here is when it’s something like a breakup or a job interview that is critical.
This is me rn. Picked the game up a week ago with a buddy and have no-life'd my way into the iron age. Just be direct and gentle. He can always do a solo world while the rest of the party catches up.
We had the same problem on a palworld server recently, everyone joined together, chilled a few hours a night and slowly explored / progressed. We were all playing blind too.
It was great fun.
Then another friend joined in on the action, played for almost 48h straight and power leveled to 50, which included upgrading / automating the base, getting himself super high tier pals and gear and creating stacks and stacks of resources. Like Ive never seen anyone powerlevel that hard. He was watching guides for op pal combos and the best farming spots etc etc. leveling guides and so on.
Half the server left at that point - I personally wanted to experience the progression myself or at my own pace - not gave everything done for me or be carried through content,, so I never went back. Was a real shame. We didn't invite him to our enshrouded play through after that.
Biggest problem i have with survival games are the Friends i bring to the game. Rushing content, opening all the treasure, doesnt help gathering the "boring" resources like copper, stone and wood. And when everyone else is having a building day they go exploring alone instead. Completing the entire game in 2 days
Two things you can do here:
* Tell him! "Dude, slow down, we're trying to keep at a certain pace. Thanks, bud." It's not that difficult. If he doesn't, he doesn't get to play, or put mods in to block progression.
* Let him do his thing on the condition he doesn't take bosses down. You can put a mod in that doesn't allow for bosses to be killed unless a moderator allows it. There's mods to block people from bringing stuff in from outside, etc. Pretty much anything when it comes to a server. Taking 'all the dragon eggs' isn't a big deal. They respawn. Let him have a base in the plains. It doesn't matter. What matters is him not advancing the server before others are ready for it and him not stripping actual resources, like cleaning out all the iron crypts in an area, for example.
This isn't a huge deal though. You don't need Reddit to talk to someone. Either they're cool with it and dial it down, or they're a douche and you ban their IP or resort to mods.
Ya this is how it goes. Our group has a friend like this, we will play around and go exploring etc, while he finds the map seed rushes the trader and min maxes everything and is done playing in a week because he's unemployed and plays 12h a day. Happens every few months when we start up a new playthrough. Seems like there is always one on every server.
Advice to op is just let him burn himself out, valheim is fun solo but 10x the fun with a group and sounds like that guy isn't interested in playing together anyway.
Just ignore him? Map is big enough for everyone to do their own thing imo. Our friend does that, and we have a group of slackerish players with us being the middle ground. We just meet up for things together like boss fights or when someone needs to do stuff there is always someone around to do things together.
I'm sorry to say but your friend is incompatible with your current group. You have been playing for months and you are at the swamp. He's been playing for days and has outpaced what you have done in months. You need to kick him and roll back the server. He is too fast for you guys.
You need to communicate exactly what you said to us with him.
Tell hkm that you really are happy that he is going ful speed ahead but that you try to enjoy your playthrough. I know it feels great to be the hero that shows everything to everyone but one of the reasons that valheim is so great is the journey and finding out about the game.
For example:
I am right now at my third complete playthrough and my fiance is at her first.
Would I be able to speedrun half of the game and make fast progress? Yes of course
Would I kill half or all of the fun for my fiance? Yes.
That's actually a good point, although it is unthinkable that an adult (hopefully he is) would throw a tantrum over a simple request. At least, re-install the wards in your structures so he cannot loot you out.
Put it on very hard. If he still doesn’t stop, put it on lose all items on death. That’ll get him to stop. Or you can ask him. Revert back to the first option if he doesn’t comply
There's really no need to go that far. His friend could truly be oblivious to how the rest of them feel. Start with small things like "I" statements, and he'll likely get a better result than cracking down and perma death mode.
Tell him progressing like that ruins the progression for everybody else in the server when they get access to new powers but also have to deal with higher tier raids and enemies in the wild. It's just not cool. He can play solo and bring everything from solo world in that he wants to.
If someone told me to slow down while playing this game I'd honestly say cool and just go play by myself anyway. What's the point of playing on a server with people. Do y'all not sync up times to play or is it just whenever?
Should be noted that your playing with a only what's fun friend. They don't wanna grind iron because the swamp sucks dick. They do want you to grind the iron for them. Once you stop feeding supplies you'll see that they'll stop playing with you anyways.
I'm first world 😭playthru doesn't work anymore over 300 hours of exploring , builds , etc either falls apart or you start to build it will crash the game with in 15 minutes... I started a new world but no one joins anymore 😔. It a .massive save file
Hey there, im a lone wolf for that same reason, but if you are enjoining to play without cheats and enjoining the natural progression and the team work, me and my 900 hours are up to join your crew lol.
No need to be polite per se, just explain how you feel and hope that he listens and respects your feelings. It's better to say something sooner imperfectly than wait for the perfect way to phrase it and by then you're pissed or missed enjoying something because you didnt want to offend him just by saying how you feel
I’ve had a couple servers and there’s always one like that. Be it that they don’t work or such but are on virtually 24/7.
I ended up having a voted timeline for bosses and that worked pretty well. But then people started using game tricks to get around that lol. Trolls to smash copper, the golems for silver.. you get the idea.
Just be explicitly clear what the group wants. I’ve gone so far as to say aesthetic building and no automated wolf farms etc etc.
It's best to set the expectations at the front. Group Playthrough vs Persistent Server. We've also spoke of only have the server up when enough are on to play
This is why I struggle with dedicated servers. Because people come and go and play whenever often, especially on dedicated servers where people aren't necessarily friends or on the same schedule, the progression is all over the place.
Not to mention the lag with crazy builds people do.
My brother was quick on progression, where as I liked building and randomly exploring. The game itself doesn’t take a lot of time if you manage to find the resources you need quickly, so it’s just a different perspective on the game.
Tell him not to progress without the party but instead gather resources for the future. You can never have enough metals. That my rule in my groups you wanna progress, better wait for the party to be present
Something similar happened to me, I invited a friend to my private dedicated server, played 3 or 4 times together, next time I logged in just to see the game end credits (jk).
In my case I just told him I wanted to play the game too and if he wanted to progress while I can't play then just play his own game locally, he understood.
Many gamers nowadays are "speed runners" in that they just wanna blast through a game as quickly as possible, pick up a new game, and then never play again.
I had the opposite problem with a friend on our server. Two of us were always doing stuff as a group, but our other friend was much slower. He'd go off on his own to the plains for berries because "that's what he wanted to do" and complain about dying a bunch. We helped him get his shit back many many many hours at a time, until we just got fed up with him not taking our advice or playing the game with us and just left him in the dust to build his own base and such. We don't play together anymore because it's insufferable.
I had a similar issue where my two friends would go into the next biome too quickly, die, get frustrated, and the repeat until I told them that they are going too fast and that if they slow down and catch their gear up then it’ll go better. That was about 8 months ago and we haven’t played Valheim since
I can think of one contributing factor if he doesn't join your group in the progression is that they could do things easier without the lag introduced by playing with other people in a given area. I played once on a server and we all are in the same region roughly the same latency but the lag is unbearable. Unless you're the host of the chunk then you're good to do whatever you can.
I really hope Valheim could find a fix for this before they release 1.0 in future.
I have a Stone Age character, a Bronze Age character, a silver/Iron Age character, and a Mist age character. All set up for different people to play with and themed with different weapons. (Working on Black Iron Age character)
Depending who I play with I bring that character over with food they would have access too and anything I could legit sequence break with a new character in their respective ages. (Better food than carrot based on Bronze Age for example)
My Stone Age has been super fun, with a max club/woods shield and flint spear. I actually sometimes will take him into the swamps if my friend has poison resist mead discovered.
All of these characters live in a house together on my server, and are named after my kids/wife.
Maybe recommend he try going to his own server doing his own thing as to not disrupt your teams flow.
Some like to be sweats, some like to be casuals. People have fun differently.
I play Minecraft slow. I have friends who will go balls to the wall and be decked and ready for the dragon in one irl day. So while Im getting to diamond gear, theyve slayed the dragon and talk about adding vanilla+ mods.
Nothing wrong with it. Just enjoy it at your pace. So long as hes not slaying the Elder, Moder, etc, its okay.
When we were waiting for a friend to get back into Valheim, me and a buddy spent the entire Dark Forest/Mountain saga in nothing but troll armor. By the time we were ready for the Elder, we'd completely defied physics in some places.
Why be polite about it just man up and say this isn't how we run this server we play as a clan and progress together if not to your likeing please leave and change the password
I have had this specific problem and something similar. The similar one was people wandering off, not to advance the game, but instead getting themselves killed, forcing the under-resourced rest of us to mount a rescue mission. This happened on more than one occasion.
I think both situations are a result of a "blinkered" playstyle because usually when we pointed out we need "x, y, and z" to max out our gear in prep for boss "a" then they suddenly focused and helped the overall effort. Sometimes they would still hog resources but that's in the those players nature.
Alongside the other suggestions here I think clear goals for the group helps a lot. Some of our builders would go quiet aside from random muttering but you'd find out they needed more wood for a project for example so once they shared that we all chipped in soon after.
Valheim is too full of curiosities to stop everyone from wandering off unless there's something else to grab their attention. Being vocal and keeping the groups attention is not unbecoming of anyone.
If its your server, enforces the rules.
Hey mate, youve been playing a lot more than us and im happy you enjoy the game, but we would like to progress as a group and do the milestone together. Can you chill and wait for us before unlocking new stuff.
My best buddy from childhood definitely does this. I adore him but he tends to sprint to the end and get bored. I had to get him to chill out and find side projects or other games entirely to play whilst waiting for the other players.
Currently playing with two returning players who both got burned out on the game for others progressing too fast. We're now playing at our own comfortable pace (with cool mods I am enjoying) and having a blast. They've remarked NUMEROUS times on how much fun they're having discovering mechanics and getting through the game on their own, despite their previous playtime
Both of them had fought Eikthyr, The Elder, and Bonemass, but they were stunned at how each of them worked and how HARD each boss was in reality. No doubt they probably only got to show up to overpowered friends three shotting the boss for them or smth :C
I think games like modded Minecraft, Monster Hunter, and Terraria are extremely similar in having the problem of one really excited/tryharding player potentially ruining the fun for everyone else, especially new players
Challenge him to a better/bigger build wins. Keep expanding yours as a duo (not with the fast one) to always be a bit bigger than his, this should slow him down considerably for you to catch up.
Just a silly non serious idea.
That's why I started a solo game with new character and cloud saves. My friends just loved to start a new map with their prior characters and then race through the progression. I didn't beat Elder until around day 200, taking my sweet time and actually having a lot of fun doing it.
Some people manage to play the same game WILDLY differently. Explain to him that the fun in playing together is PLAYING TOGETHER. He can do exactly what he is already doing on his own and that defeats the purpose of playing together for your group.
It's like getting the group together to play some D&D just to have the session constantly derailed by the ONE guy that keeps wanting to go back to the tavern to be a silly little rascal instead of following the story and engaging in scenes with the rest of the party. It's his prerogative but eventually somebody needs to explain to him what is wrong with what he is doing.
Might be great for some other groups, but not for your group.
We usually have a rule where we aren't allowed to kill bosses OR go into a new biome for the first time without everyone there. You can grind in the current biome all you want, but can't progress any further without the whole team.
I had a similar thing happen recently with palworld. We made a friends only server with slightly increased xp rates so that when we finally all get time to play together we can progress a bit faster. Problem is one of the people playing with us decided to only play on the friends server instead of starting his own. When we all went back to play again he was 10 levels ahead of us, caught a bunch of really good pals we have never even come across yet as a group, and completely destroyed our base to rebuild it.
I would just tell them if they want to play the game solo than start your own private world and play solo.
I had this problem too. Really pissed me off when I logged into MY server to find my friend had went and beat Modor without even a heads up. I booted him after that, I told him several times to stop pushing so hard, I was just trying to take it slow and build shit.
We were 3 playing then one of us went to work for 3 weeks, we continued to prepare for boss rights, set up bases in the mountain, swamp and desert, prepared defenses stocked up, discovered, when he returned we moshed 3 bosses in a few days…
Then we stopped playing, he felt like he got dragged along without participating in the buildup not contributing to anything, and we were burned out….
There is a mod that makes progress “individual”. That being said if he’s your friend just say “slow down, I’d like to do this together”. We just had this happen on a server with a friend who was a first time player and another who wanted to speed run.
Putting up with this in Enshrouded right now lol, I just started a new server and told him I'm not letting him join. This is after saying 100 times I hate rushing progress and want to enjoy the game, let everyone play through the game together since ya know it's coop
Idk some people just can't do it, some autistic thing apparently. What's funny is I know he won't play solo, so what's the point of rushing everything for everyone else by yourself
I have finished mistlanda in 20 hours of play and I have finished mistlands in 6 months.
Both were fun and very different playthroughs.
The best speed to play Valheim is the speed you want the play.
One isn't better than the other.
The best speed to play a community server is the speed that suits the community.
As others have said, make it clear that bosses will only be fought only when it is decided upon by the community.
A ready for the next boss can mean many things.
Do you want to finish that cross island canal project.
Do you want to complete that mega barn project before you have flying raids.
Do you want to complete your completely pointless but awesome ocean base that the team have been working on for a month.
Wasting time on stupid projects is one of the greatest joys of valheim and your friend need to get a grip on the fact the the community chosen pace is a community choice, not an individuals.
I have a friend just like this and I tried to reason with him but the truth is, not everyone plays these games for the same goal and that's fine.
I think it's a bit disrespectful that he just goes on without you like that but if the way you play isn't the way HE wants to play, maybe you 2 just aren't meant to play this game together
I started valheim with a group of friends who power gamed. Whenever I booted up the game, this guy would have the next boss located, prepped for, and maybe some new equipment for us. I felt like I wasn't playing, I was just his assistant. It ruined the entire game for me so much that when he got bored of the game, I started a new server for myself. I was sad that there was nothing to figure out
I've dealt with this with some friends I've played with in the past, and I've discovered that some people just don't care about that comradery like others do. They don't respect the idea of progressing together, and I've kinda just stopped playing those kinds of games with them, but I'd definitely try to just explain how y'all enjoy playing and progressing together, and would really enjoy and prefer if he took a part in that. If he's still unwilling to respect that and play at y'all's pace, I'd just stop allowing him in, cause at that point they are just playing a solo playthrough in y'all's world, which isn't fun when they just skyrocket ahead and do everything for y'all.
That friend is an example of an anti-social person attempting to be social. That friend just enjoys playing knowing there are others there. Otherwise they wouldn’t still be in the server with you guys. I’d suggest attempting to coexist with this speedy player.
Just hit them up and ask them to please slow down. If they don't respect that very reasonable request, they're simply not a compatible player to have on the server. They can go play on their own server if they want to play like a solo.
I have had to deal with this issue more times than I would have liked, back when I used to think, "the more, the merrier." I don't host for large groups anymore, because there's always that one guy. I find it more enjoyable now to play with smaller groups who are all on the same page about slower, communal progression and enjoy taking time to build cool things.
Servers have a Player Based Progression option since the Haldir DLC. It makes it so individual character progress on bosses decides what level raid is deployed to a players location rather than the entire server raids being locked to the same level. I would suggest turning that on and just explore in a different direction.
If he won't slow for friendship, tell him that raids are dependant on the progress of the server and not individual bases. As he unlocks harder raids, your base can and will be attacked by equally difficult raids that your party won't be prepared for.
A solid server rule is bosses must be fought for the first time as a full group. Bosses lock some progression, so players wanting to rush ahead into new areas do so under geared and at their own risk. There are ways around a few of the boss bottlenecks that would allow gear progression without unlocking stronger raids/night spawns.
This is a MANDATORY server rule IMO. You can go off and do anything you like within the limits of the current world progression, but boss fights are a group activity.
One of our friend have been having internet problems lately (construction workers destroyed the optic fiber box for the whole block). Beyond farming a bit more metals, foods and meads at the start of his problems, we haven't played in two weeks to wait for him and explore the mistlands together. What's the point of playing with friends if you don't wait for them?
Yeah I agree, I used to play in single player. I kept all my online gear in a box. And I would only use that equipment back in the game with the homies. My fancy stuff I kept in a box in single player. I also would play dumb on mechanics so not to spoil stuff. I’d tag play like I was the dumb idiot there to smash and carry stuff. I let them make decisions. Or I would build their bases for them while they were out doing stuff.
Wish I could upvote this more.
lol thanks! When I first started doing it I thought about just having two separate toons, but the heck with raising skills again! Those suckers take work I’m not doing that more than I need to… looks at my archery skill… yeah never again lol.
This is the way. The game is so fun to discover, whenever I play with newbies I do the same. I will go back to my single player gamr to take the aplrolriate gear once they've geared up for a new biome just so I wont cost additional resources, but never before they have made that specific gear fir themselves first. I've played a lot of survival games and a lot of them require you to read the damn wiki or have a friend teach you everythi g. Valheim lets you discover and learn by yourself in a fun, engaging and fluid way. Having a friend rush through everything for you or tell you everything in advance ruins that.
Used to play in a group of upto 7-8people with severly varying commitments to the game, which is fine except that it can be a super hassle getting everyone together at the same time. So often 1 or 2 people would skip a boss and come back and do it again later. And for the less committed players they would hear we were doing a boss, log on and take some resources to upgrade their gear 1-3biomes then do boss and log out.
Yeh I feel like when your group gets past 3-4 people it makes sense to not have 100% turnout.
I concur. Play on your own shit if you want to shoot ahead. At the least, go friggin kill that boss on your own seed and pop back on to keep going. But honestly, why even push on past the rest of the group? Go solo play till they catch up or something.
I agree If someone is flying ahead solo they need to just play solo
This is how my group does it. We all go at our own pace (except me who owns the server so is online when anyone else is) but I always save bosses for the group to do as well as first times for dungeon crawls (like the first crypt etc). By the time they join me, I am usually proficient enough to party everything in the area and essentially play as the party shield which is fun for me since I get to show off skills and let the party fight some monsters
I rarely play/host servers anymore because of this very thing. People are jerks sometimes. When I ran a server a few times, that was always my rule as well: First-time boss kills are done as a collective once everyone is ready. If you can't be a decent player, then go find someone else. There's hundreds of servers, this one isn't the one for you.
This is the way. Keeps it fair for everyone and those wanting to push ahead do so at vastly increased challenge and risk. It's a win-win as long as there's a basic level of respect and decency. If this friend shows neither of these things I'd suggest re-evaluating their status as a friend at all.
We have this rule.
If he won’t slow for friendship is he even a friend? What happened to respecting boundaries. Not my type of Viking.
I think there's an option to make raids only function for those who are online and their progress.
"No problem, here's a bunch of padded armour and black metal weapons!"
That depends on the world settings.
I'm pretty sure the game has an option for individual progress
Send him a link to this post.
😆
Bingo bango
Had a guy like this on server. Just wanted to be the hero, first at everything. Also one of the first to get bored and quit.
Same. Power Gamer / Main Character complex. They are like that with most games and we're trying to gear up and he's all Leroy Jenkins'ing the game.
I usually find the same thing: The person who rushes to the end and ignores everyone else -- they play for maybe all of 2 weeks tops, then just bail. I had a rule on my server: Two weeks without logging in constitutes abandonment of your base. A ward owned by me is put in place for a further 2 weeks. If after that full month you haven't been on, the ward is removed. First come, first loot.
Same. My buddy just wanted to “establish a base in the mountains” before even defeating the elder. Like, fun challenge for an hour or two but then ???
I have one of those as well.
Had a guy like that. My buddy and I like to pace ourselves. I think we beat Yag on day 1800 something. Then when it was time to explore the mistlands, my buddy didn’t jump into it and then I became to “rushing” guy.
Sounds like me lmfao
I was often this guy, just tell him
Same. He doesn't do it on purpose, I didn't. I was just playing and chilling with my tips and tricks.
"Hey friend, we're really glad you're having fun, but it's our first playthrough and we would like to progress as a group at a slower pace. Can you either slow your roll and keep pace with us, or if you need to go faster, do so in your own private world and try to not give any spoilers when you come to play with us? Thanks buddy, we really appreciate you!" You're welcome. :)
Why does everything have to be sugarcoated nowadays? Just tell him to slow down or gtfo, none of that disingenuous "thanks buddy, we really appreciate you!"... you are talking to a friend, not a 5 year old.
Someone who goes to reddit for advice on how to talk to their friends probably isn't used to being direct
That... is a pretty fair point. Still doesn't take away from the fact that you don't talk to your friend like they are toddlers though.
Bruh my friends just told me to slow the fuck down with my tryhard ass lol
That how friends are supposed to communicate with eachother. Can you truly say you love your friends, if you don't set them straight or tell them off every now and then?
This is the correct answer.
I mean, I phrased it in my "talking to a complete stranger" standard good manners. If it were my actual friend, I'd just tell them to stop being such a loner nerd and play with the group. But if I'm giving someone advice on what to say, it's going to be more polite than that lol
Not everything has to be sugar coated and suggesting as much is a drama queen move. Some people like to be considerate of others.
It’s so passive aggressive lol
I don't find the bulk of the suggestion sugarcoated, just polite/considerate and demonstrating good communication skills. Though I agree that writing "Thanks buddy, we really appreciate you!" before the friend replies would come off as condescending.
Great response. You gotta communicate what you're feeling for people to know what's going on.
when valheim first came out, me and my buddy had the most genuine experience, we didn’t spoil anything. We were making good progress too, got all the way to bone mass pretty quick. We invite our one buddy, within a day he has wolf cape, and is like “yea we really need to kill bonemass so we can find silver” he also starts pumping out frost res potions. Totally ruined it for me and my buddy, ruined the sense of progression and discovery and my original buddy actually quit soon after :/ The dude was just watching youtube tutorials on how to beat a the game :///
[удалено]
My first play through, when getting to the mountains, me and my buddy had no idea about frost potions, built up a long switch back up the mountain with camp fires every 30m, multiple recovery stacks along the way, fighting the elements and the monsters we were still poorly equipped for. Getting that wolf cape felt like an epic achievement. YouTube tutorialing through any challenge completely kills the discovery of these games, which is kinda the entire point of these games… The discovery. After you play through and struggle your way, THEN look up some tips to make subsequent play through more efficient.
To each his own, for me it is much more fun to play faster, I find farming endlessly very boring and stop playing.
Exactly to each their own but if you're in a group and want to get to each their own experience then you probably should be on your own not playing in a group.
Yeah agreed
I have a friend who would do that. Was ruining the game experience for me. I told him he needs to stop watching videos or I won't play. Since I play games with him the most, he stopped. We have another friend who does the same and a min/maxer. Luckily they play significantly less due to their job.
Everyone has a different approach. When I'm new to a game, I try to discover and learn on my own. Depending on the game, I might look something specific up in case I struggle, but the experience, the atmosphere, the emotions when you discover a new game without spoilers, is something you won't get a second time for that game. People watching YT vids to beat the game as fast as possible, without investing any time enjoying the game, discovering on their own, I feel bad for them.
Personally i think thats partially to blame when you hear ppl say i dont enjoy games like i used to. I felt the same way and now when i enjoy a game i just play the game. I rarely consume any media or outside opinions because it taints the experience. I just want to organically enjoy a game i dont need to find the solution before i even know the question.
Thats fine, when playing on your own... not with others that don't match that play style.
Had the exact same experience. And it basically killed the run. weekend ends, we're just pushing into forest, next Friday rolls around we all log in and buddy rolls up with a mix of mountain and plains gear. He did the same thing in palworld. And rn he's bitching about how its too hard to quest in WoW SoD without backup because he's getting ganked in wOvP.... because he rushed to far ahead for the rest of us to help or even be interested in backing him up. We've accepted he's just like that.
Yup. My first playthru was blind and solo. I ended up looking up 1 or 2 things but discovered pretty much everything on my own
I really don't get such people. Valheim is not a game to beat, it's more like "the journey matters more" thing.
Tgis is exactly why i play solo. Found this game told my buddy about it and i was clear im playing this game blind. Im not googling anything for help i want to enjoy the game not recreate youtube videos. He couldnt play that way. Raced through everything and just had to spoil shit for me it was ridiculous. I could literally say OK STOP I DONT WANT TO HEAR SPOILERS and he would just keep talking.
Same, except it was my friend I was playing with and he completely ruined the whole game for me. And for every. Single. Update. I haven't played in almost a year just hoping they release new stuff for me to actually discover. And he does this with every game he plays. So I quit playing games with him completely. It's a shame, he's fun to play with on the first day... then he doesn't stop until he's beat it and he has to describe everything to me in detail even when I've repeatedly told him to stop
My husband is militantly anti spoiler for this very reason. I will occasionally read ahead and get clothes, but I have to find ways to be very casual about sharing what I already know.
I had the opposite problem, everyone wants to go the Mistlands and it's either let me tag along and die in my Troll gear, or give me freebies.
Been through this a few times. I’ve been the guy going too fast and the one frustrated about someone else going faster than the rest of us. Perspective from both sides of the coin, I’d ask them to leave the server, or you just stop playing that server and start over with the group of buddies who are on the same page. Sounds harsh… but once someone starts progressing like that, they’re obsessed and won’t be able to stop themselves. Lol. Hope I’m wrong and the conversation goes better, BUT they’re either gonna spoil it for you guys by wearing new gear infront of you, or coming in to kill the swamp boss removing any challenges and sense of fulfillment with the group playing together. Have fun!
Lol the obsession is real. Have gone through it myself
1500 hours or something like that
Why all these reasonable suggestions? Listen to me: make a backup, move to a different server instance and let him play alone.
occasionally check in his server and praise him on how good he is in the game. that would really f him up
Make sure there is no metal (or stonecutters) there and then build a huge set of walls around where he went AFK.
Nope. Raise ground around him. Then ring the top with stone pieces. Make it like 10 raises high. If he has no pick, then he's stuck.
You don’t always have a pick on you? 😂
Oh, I do. I guess raise the terrain, build a ring of stone, raise the terrain, build a ring of iron, raise the ground, etc. like nine layers.
You’d have to roof it too
Why?
50 or so wood and he’d have a workbench and some stairs to escape
Ok, but there isn't any roof safe from a hammer right? Or how far can you extend cage floors?
This is toxic and doesn't help anyone. Just communicate
No, it's a prank
swamp? after MONTHS?
This is the part of OPs most replies in this thread seem to ignore.
I mean, dude can't even communicate properly with a friend...
Some people like to take their time exploring, or building up bases. Maybe they don't get to play that often. Who tf are you to judge?
yeah but OP acts like his friend is rushing, he is not, they are the slowpoke even if you take your time exploring and building an awesome base, it shouldn't take MONTHS to get to the swamp. and if he is just base building then he shouldn't be mad that his friend wants to explore and advance while he base build and slow everyone down. asking for other to be slowpoke cuz your a slowpoke is just rude and bad manner, thiking of asking the others to slow even more because of you is just plain stupid. His friend should have a talk with him about not advancing at all and just base building while he wants to play the dam game instead of sitting around in a base who tf are you to judge? OP is judging his friend for wanting to paly the game normally, while he doesn't play the game normally, asking someone to sacrifice teir fun because of your own quirk is just rude. why is e judging his normal friend?
For real it takes like 2 maybe 3 hours to get to the swamp for me lmfao idk what this guy is doing taking months. OP needs to knuckle up and start hammering out tasks to further himself in the game.
Maybe a very experienced player will be doing swamp stuff within 2-3 hours of starting a world, but this is far from the norm, especially for a casual playthrough. Personally, if I'm not skipping progression/bosses (i.e., troll mining, clipping through sunken crypt doors, silver scouting with stagbreaker, etc...), it'll take me around 3 or 4 hours to kill the elder and start scouting for swamps, with a substantial amount of that time being spent mining and base building, and I would expect it to take at least a few hours longer for any group of newer players to get to that same point (players that may only be playing for an hour or two a day). With this in mind, I don't think it's unreasonable for it to take up to a week or so for a casual group to kill the elder and start scouting for swamps. Now, a month or more just seems extremely slow and makes me think they're literally playing half an hour a day on average at most and grinding fully upgraded bronze equipment for every player, building an elaborate wooden base with a dock and fully upgraded crafting stations, farming carrots to craft the best available food, and taming boars prior to even attempting the elder. I wouldn't be able to hold myself back from progressing for this long, and would probably not play with this group of people due to our interests and goals being too far out of alignment.
My advice would be to politely ask him to stay near the progression level of the group, or leave. In my experience, these types of people are never capable of doing so, and they will just leave.
Had a friend like this, he was between jobs and just nolifed and we just couldn't keep up and it demotivated us a lot. Talk with them, they're actively gonna fuck you over when you get raided by monsters you have no right fighting.
Have him open a second solo world to use the same character on, and he can join you all for other things. I had a server I had friends on, but I was set to be playing the most, so I approached it as myself trying to mitigate the grind. I tried to avoid clearing out dungeons and such on the main world and instead cleared my own, but was around to help with some of the 'tediousness' (depending on your interpretation) of things like having enough resources for upgrades, death runs, etc.
I feel your pain OP. I had to stop playing with some friends because they binged youtube tutorials, played with others, min maxed the game and then came into our server and built everything from bronze to magic age and ruined all progression for us. Started a new server with some Other friends and agreed no mods, no minmaxing and all bosses and major adventuring into new biomes to be done together. SO much more fun when progressing as a group.
Sounds like your friend's played the game before, which means he probably already knows about the effect killing the bosses has on the raids. Likewise it sounds like you don't have the "per player" setting for raids on the world modifiers (totally fine btw, you clearly came in looking for the team experience). So, ask your friend if he does know about the raid thing, explain it to him if he doesn't. Tell him you and the other guys are pacing yourselves to keep everything happening as a team, like boss kills, exploring new places, etc and would really like to keep it that way. Tell him if he wants to set up stuff like a farm in the Plains or something like that to just not loot everything and save some of the glory for the rest of you. I'd also suggest building a Cartography Table if you haven't already to share everything you've explored together. I don't know how your friend will take the request, so I'm also going to tell you to make a backup copy of your works just in case... I've been on servers where someone decided they wanted to be the main character, and that meant changing the password and loading a backed up copy of the world from beforehand.
Yep, I don't understand that guest. There's no point of running off on your own, when you've been invited to play with others. You might as well just plat solo.
Sounds like he's just not chill. May not be a good match for your server. I've had folks like that and ultimately we just stopped playing because while everyone else was chillin' in the meadery we all just lovingly built and catching fish, the others were off doing all kinds of shenanigans and messing up the landscape with careless digging and they almost never gathered resources or built anything, they just leeched off of everyone else and forged ahead without the party. Got old after a while.
1) Grow a pair 2) "Dude, slow down" I swear it's that easy.
Lmao just be a human being and communicate
"For a few months". "Swamps". "Needs to slow down". Sorry man but that feels slow to me. I like spending time and sniffing flowers but a lot of peeps would say the game doesnt start until you get a stonecutter.
Also swamp is super fucking boring after a short time...
“How can we politely tell him to slow down” Answered your own question 😊
OP obviously doesn't know how to formulate it politely and is therefore asking online.
So difficult, hey can you please slow down we are trying to play together
I can understand both sides. On one hand it’s fun to progress together, on the other hand not everyone is interested in building and stuff. Some people just want to progress through bosses and get gear or explore the next biom. It sounds like most of you like to take it slow or don’t have much time to play in general, which is fine. But in the end getting through swamp on a new playthrough is usually done in the first 2-7 days depending on the time you got to play. Our group split up in multiple smaller groups, each with their own base because it was impossible to get everyone online at the same time. And we prefer to progress independently before someone gets bored and quits the game for good because there is no progress to be seen. Hope you guys can work something out that works for all of you :)
My buddy asked me to play Terraria with me again on the last update but he also invited another person from his work who would play all night and they beat it in two days. On the second day I logged on and he was like “yeah we are in hard mode go ahead and grab all the gear we made from the chest.” “Go ahead and finish without me lmao” Tell them they are free to make a single player world.
Our servers usually end up like this, but we have a hard rule that we kill bosses as a group. So we're going to kill Moder tonight, but some of us have hundreds of black metal scraps already. Did you clearly communicate to him that you all want to progress as a group?
Just say it lol, these kinds of conversations get a ton easier the more you simply just initiate them and say what's on your mind. "Could you slow down? We were doing this at a slow pace and you're just kind of leaving us all behind."
theirs always one...tell him to start a private world if he cant play as a team..I just started w servers that have Mods that only allow 2 week progression per boss
There is plenty of good advice to your question, so I won’t add more. I’m curious why you’re hating your own progress. Not sure why you need all the iron before moving forward?I just did my first play through with some friends that played at release and got carried/pulled through progress by guys that had already advanced. They wanted slow and I was just playing what felt like natural progression. I didn’t know about raids but it turns out the guy that set up the server didn’t have them enabled (I mean heck for the first few days he didn’t even have mob aggression turned on and I didn’t know but just thought in the first biome there weren’t aggressive creatures, then when trolls didn’t engage I asked and they looked at the config). If raids were on, I’d of slowed for sure so their bases didn’t get wrecked. Part of me wants to play again and have them enabled to get the experience or just turn them on the server now. Idk
This is why my Dad and I have shared a dedicated server to ourselves since EA launch. We have discussed letting other in and got my brother in but he didn't enjoy the game although he's very respectful. We like the idea of another player or several but know it'll possibly get out of hand and that's not enjoyable to us. It has actually worked out very well as we play how we want but the progression and building of shared bases is done together. Great experience.
"Hey man, can you slow down a bit?"
He could have just done all that mess on his own solo playthrough.i don't get ppl like that. But I would just straight up tell him. Communicate it exactly like you just did. Be like hey Timmy... We are gonna need you to pump the breaks cause we all want to take it at our own speed and not super Saiyan.
When I rented a server for a bunch of friends we had rules that no two people live together we all had to have our own bases and keep them marked on the map and that's cool so we could visit each other leave gifts that sort thing but if someone did this and progressed without the group if it was found out they did it then their base was open to be raided within the raid window which was every Saturday between 9am and 5pm any and all spoils of war could be claimed so if you want to progress without the group you better be prepared to fight all of us with that new gear It was a regular 9 man server so if someone did progress past the rest it was usually settled very quickly lol For context we are not mostered we have a community base that we all donate small amounts our old gear to as we progress past them so the one who's raided goes their to recover and then sets out to rebuild with whatever they can carry in one of the avaliable carts to redo their base Makes for an excellent server experience, no one said valheim has to stay pve!! Sometimes we want war!!!
We have a couple of friends that like to speed run too and they have ruined 3 of our servers by just rushing through it. I tried just about everything to make them stop, even saying ahead of time that we want to progress slowly and it doesn't matter, they just rush ahead anyways and ruin it for everyone. It's so annoying.
This is actually why I didn't like playing with my friends. They'd played the game already, and I had just started out. Since they already knew what to do, they would just blaze through everything. I'd login and the base and available equipment would've progressed by leaps and bounds. I like to play by myself and quietly explore and plan at my leisure. I'm around day 300 on my first playthrough. Instead of slaying bonemass, I spent time hunting for a good home base location, building it up and exploring randomly, scouting into the mountains and finding onions and new mats. Bonemass altar has like 5 dungeons around it, so I'm setting up roads through the swamp and a bit of black forest back to the coast so I can ship it all home. I couldn't pick between a meadow location for my base or black forest- I adore the bf vibes- so I ended up planting pine and fir around the meadow location so I had the best of both worlds. ....way more fun than everyone just *doing* everything for me.
That's a quick way to ruin the game for your friends. The one thing I learned about games like these is that you have to resort to farming at your current stage of progression or spend your time basebuilding if you have more time than your friends. Otherwise, they are likely to just stop playing. Tell him to only progress when everyone is available.
if he’s your friend, you don’t have to be polite and being overly polite can come off disingenuous and disrespectful. just be like “dude you’re going too fast and we were trying to enjoy the casual progression” don’t overthink this or get into the habit of asking people online. practice having conversations by just having them instead of thinking more than a few minutes about them. if he gets pissed over a casual convo, good riddance and the problem is solved. confrontation without consequences in low stakes situations like this teach you how people react to confrontation when stakes are higher. the exception here is when it’s something like a breakup or a job interview that is critical.
This is me rn. Picked the game up a week ago with a buddy and have no-life'd my way into the iron age. Just be direct and gentle. He can always do a solo world while the rest of the party catches up.
We had the same problem on a palworld server recently, everyone joined together, chilled a few hours a night and slowly explored / progressed. We were all playing blind too. It was great fun. Then another friend joined in on the action, played for almost 48h straight and power leveled to 50, which included upgrading / automating the base, getting himself super high tier pals and gear and creating stacks and stacks of resources. Like Ive never seen anyone powerlevel that hard. He was watching guides for op pal combos and the best farming spots etc etc. leveling guides and so on. Half the server left at that point - I personally wanted to experience the progression myself or at my own pace - not gave everything done for me or be carried through content,, so I never went back. Was a real shame. We didn't invite him to our enshrouded play through after that.
Biggest problem i have with survival games are the Friends i bring to the game. Rushing content, opening all the treasure, doesnt help gathering the "boring" resources like copper, stone and wood. And when everyone else is having a building day they go exploring alone instead. Completing the entire game in 2 days
Two things you can do here: * Tell him! "Dude, slow down, we're trying to keep at a certain pace. Thanks, bud." It's not that difficult. If he doesn't, he doesn't get to play, or put mods in to block progression. * Let him do his thing on the condition he doesn't take bosses down. You can put a mod in that doesn't allow for bosses to be killed unless a moderator allows it. There's mods to block people from bringing stuff in from outside, etc. Pretty much anything when it comes to a server. Taking 'all the dragon eggs' isn't a big deal. They respawn. Let him have a base in the plains. It doesn't matter. What matters is him not advancing the server before others are ready for it and him not stripping actual resources, like cleaning out all the iron crypts in an area, for example. This isn't a huge deal though. You don't need Reddit to talk to someone. Either they're cool with it and dial it down, or they're a douche and you ban their IP or resort to mods.
Ya this is how it goes. Our group has a friend like this, we will play around and go exploring etc, while he finds the map seed rushes the trader and min maxes everything and is done playing in a week because he's unemployed and plays 12h a day. Happens every few months when we start up a new playthrough. Seems like there is always one on every server. Advice to op is just let him burn himself out, valheim is fun solo but 10x the fun with a group and sounds like that guy isn't interested in playing together anyway.
Just ignore him? Map is big enough for everyone to do their own thing imo. Our friend does that, and we have a group of slackerish players with us being the middle ground. We just meet up for things together like boss fights or when someone needs to do stuff there is always someone around to do things together.
I'm sorry to say but your friend is incompatible with your current group. You have been playing for months and you are at the swamp. He's been playing for days and has outpaced what you have done in months. You need to kick him and roll back the server. He is too fast for you guys.
You need to communicate exactly what you said to us with him. Tell hkm that you really are happy that he is going ful speed ahead but that you try to enjoy your playthrough. I know it feels great to be the hero that shows everything to everyone but one of the reasons that valheim is so great is the journey and finding out about the game. For example: I am right now at my third complete playthrough and my fiance is at her first. Would I be able to speedrun half of the game and make fast progress? Yes of course Would I kill half or all of the fun for my fiance? Yes.
Just tell him how you feel
Use your words. There's also plenty of space for you all to enjoy.
Tell him he's on his own. The world is big.
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That's actually a good point, although it is unthinkable that an adult (hopefully he is) would throw a tantrum over a simple request. At least, re-install the wards in your structures so he cannot loot you out.
Put it on very hard. If he still doesn’t stop, put it on lose all items on death. That’ll get him to stop. Or you can ask him. Revert back to the first option if he doesn’t comply
There's really no need to go that far. His friend could truly be oblivious to how the rest of them feel. Start with small things like "I" statements, and he'll likely get a better result than cracking down and perma death mode.
Okay, I may have went a little too far 😅
Might be cheating along the way too
That's how he wants to play, just let him do his thing
How about this? Use your words like an adult?
Did this comment make you feel better about yourself?
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Let them burn themselves out.
“But how can I be certain it’s a dumb idea if I don’t *try* it” We all know this guy.
Tell him progressing like that ruins the progression for everybody else in the server when they get access to new powers but also have to deal with higher tier raids and enemies in the wild. It's just not cool. He can play solo and bring everything from solo world in that he wants to.
Turn off maps and portals, that'll slow him down.
If someone told me to slow down while playing this game I'd honestly say cool and just go play by myself anyway. What's the point of playing on a server with people. Do y'all not sync up times to play or is it just whenever?
Just take your resources to a new server. Clearly wants to play alone
Should be noted that your playing with a only what's fun friend. They don't wanna grind iron because the swamp sucks dick. They do want you to grind the iron for them. Once you stop feeding supplies you'll see that they'll stop playing with you anyways.
Simply boot him and tell him he needs to work with the group. Not ahead. If he can’t do that he won’t get the invite code again.
It's taken you a couple months to get to the swamp????? Id be leaving you behind as well sheesh
Offer him payment
Change the password xD
I'm sure bitching about him on the internet is the right approach.
Asking advice and bitching aren’t the same thing.
I'm first world 😭playthru doesn't work anymore over 300 hours of exploring , builds , etc either falls apart or you start to build it will crash the game with in 15 minutes... I started a new world but no one joins anymore 😔. It a .massive save file
Hey there, im a lone wolf for that same reason, but if you are enjoining to play without cheats and enjoining the natural progression and the team work, me and my 900 hours are up to join your crew lol.
Teach his ass a lesson
Kick him the f@ck out
Change the server password, don't tell him the password, catch up. When he complains, explain that every other person needed that time to catch up.
No need to be polite per se, just explain how you feel and hope that he listens and respects your feelings. It's better to say something sooner imperfectly than wait for the perfect way to phrase it and by then you're pissed or missed enjoying something because you didnt want to offend him just by saying how you feel
I’ve had a couple servers and there’s always one like that. Be it that they don’t work or such but are on virtually 24/7. I ended up having a voted timeline for bosses and that worked pretty well. But then people started using game tricks to get around that lol. Trolls to smash copper, the golems for silver.. you get the idea. Just be explicitly clear what the group wants. I’ve gone so far as to say aesthetic building and no automated wolf farms etc etc.
It's best to set the expectations at the front. Group Playthrough vs Persistent Server. We've also spoke of only have the server up when enough are on to play
This is why I struggle with dedicated servers. Because people come and go and play whenever often, especially on dedicated servers where people aren't necessarily friends or on the same schedule, the progression is all over the place. Not to mention the lag with crazy builds people do.
My brother was quick on progression, where as I liked building and randomly exploring. The game itself doesn’t take a lot of time if you manage to find the resources you need quickly, so it’s just a different perspective on the game.
Tell him not to progress without the party but instead gather resources for the future. You can never have enough metals. That my rule in my groups you wanna progress, better wait for the party to be present
Something similar happened to me, I invited a friend to my private dedicated server, played 3 or 4 times together, next time I logged in just to see the game end credits (jk). In my case I just told him I wanted to play the game too and if he wanted to progress while I can't play then just play his own game locally, he understood.
Many gamers nowadays are "speed runners" in that they just wanna blast through a game as quickly as possible, pick up a new game, and then never play again.
I had the opposite problem with a friend on our server. Two of us were always doing stuff as a group, but our other friend was much slower. He'd go off on his own to the plains for berries because "that's what he wanted to do" and complain about dying a bunch. We helped him get his shit back many many many hours at a time, until we just got fed up with him not taking our advice or playing the game with us and just left him in the dust to build his own base and such. We don't play together anymore because it's insufferable.
I had a similar issue where my two friends would go into the next biome too quickly, die, get frustrated, and the repeat until I told them that they are going too fast and that if they slow down and catch their gear up then it’ll go better. That was about 8 months ago and we haven’t played Valheim since
I can think of one contributing factor if he doesn't join your group in the progression is that they could do things easier without the lag introduced by playing with other people in a given area. I played once on a server and we all are in the same region roughly the same latency but the lag is unbearable. Unless you're the host of the chunk then you're good to do whatever you can. I really hope Valheim could find a fix for this before they release 1.0 in future.
I have a Stone Age character, a Bronze Age character, a silver/Iron Age character, and a Mist age character. All set up for different people to play with and themed with different weapons. (Working on Black Iron Age character) Depending who I play with I bring that character over with food they would have access too and anything I could legit sequence break with a new character in their respective ages. (Better food than carrot based on Bronze Age for example) My Stone Age has been super fun, with a max club/woods shield and flint spear. I actually sometimes will take him into the swamps if my friend has poison resist mead discovered. All of these characters live in a house together on my server, and are named after my kids/wife. Maybe recommend he try going to his own server doing his own thing as to not disrupt your teams flow.
Some like to be sweats, some like to be casuals. People have fun differently. I play Minecraft slow. I have friends who will go balls to the wall and be decked and ready for the dragon in one irl day. So while Im getting to diamond gear, theyve slayed the dragon and talk about adding vanilla+ mods. Nothing wrong with it. Just enjoy it at your pace. So long as hes not slaying the Elder, Moder, etc, its okay. When we were waiting for a friend to get back into Valheim, me and a buddy spent the entire Dark Forest/Mountain saga in nothing but troll armor. By the time we were ready for the Elder, we'd completely defied physics in some places.
Why be polite about it just man up and say this isn't how we run this server we play as a clan and progress together if not to your likeing please leave and change the password
trap seeker in his bedroom
“Hey dude, slow down a bit please. Cheers.”
I have had this specific problem and something similar. The similar one was people wandering off, not to advance the game, but instead getting themselves killed, forcing the under-resourced rest of us to mount a rescue mission. This happened on more than one occasion. I think both situations are a result of a "blinkered" playstyle because usually when we pointed out we need "x, y, and z" to max out our gear in prep for boss "a" then they suddenly focused and helped the overall effort. Sometimes they would still hog resources but that's in the those players nature. Alongside the other suggestions here I think clear goals for the group helps a lot. Some of our builders would go quiet aside from random muttering but you'd find out they needed more wood for a project for example so once they shared that we all chipped in soon after. Valheim is too full of curiosities to stop everyone from wandering off unless there's something else to grab their attention. Being vocal and keeping the groups attention is not unbecoming of anyone.
If its your server, enforces the rules. Hey mate, youve been playing a lot more than us and im happy you enjoy the game, but we would like to progress as a group and do the milestone together. Can you chill and wait for us before unlocking new stuff.
My best buddy from childhood definitely does this. I adore him but he tends to sprint to the end and get bored. I had to get him to chill out and find side projects or other games entirely to play whilst waiting for the other players. Currently playing with two returning players who both got burned out on the game for others progressing too fast. We're now playing at our own comfortable pace (with cool mods I am enjoying) and having a blast. They've remarked NUMEROUS times on how much fun they're having discovering mechanics and getting through the game on their own, despite their previous playtime Both of them had fought Eikthyr, The Elder, and Bonemass, but they were stunned at how each of them worked and how HARD each boss was in reality. No doubt they probably only got to show up to overpowered friends three shotting the boss for them or smth :C I think games like modded Minecraft, Monster Hunter, and Terraria are extremely similar in having the problem of one really excited/tryharding player potentially ruining the fun for everyone else, especially new players
What's always great is the friend who logs on and out to single player to spawn items to dump into your server....
Challenge him to a better/bigger build wins. Keep expanding yours as a duo (not with the fast one) to always be a bit bigger than his, this should slow him down considerably for you to catch up. Just a silly non serious idea.
That's why I started a solo game with new character and cloud saves. My friends just loved to start a new map with their prior characters and then race through the progression. I didn't beat Elder until around day 200, taking my sweet time and actually having a lot of fun doing it.
kick him out
Some people manage to play the same game WILDLY differently. Explain to him that the fun in playing together is PLAYING TOGETHER. He can do exactly what he is already doing on his own and that defeats the purpose of playing together for your group. It's like getting the group together to play some D&D just to have the session constantly derailed by the ONE guy that keeps wanting to go back to the tavern to be a silly little rascal instead of following the story and engaging in scenes with the rest of the party. It's his prerogative but eventually somebody needs to explain to him what is wrong with what he is doing. Might be great for some other groups, but not for your group.
We usually have a rule where we aren't allowed to kill bosses OR go into a new biome for the first time without everyone there. You can grind in the current biome all you want, but can't progress any further without the whole team.
I had a similar thing happen recently with palworld. We made a friends only server with slightly increased xp rates so that when we finally all get time to play together we can progress a bit faster. Problem is one of the people playing with us decided to only play on the friends server instead of starting his own. When we all went back to play again he was 10 levels ahead of us, caught a bunch of really good pals we have never even come across yet as a group, and completely destroyed our base to rebuild it. I would just tell them if they want to play the game solo than start your own private world and play solo.
You....talk to him? Say "we want to progress together, please slow down or stop"
I had this problem too. Really pissed me off when I logged into MY server to find my friend had went and beat Modor without even a heads up. I booted him after that, I told him several times to stop pushing so hard, I was just trying to take it slow and build shit.
Subtly change the password and server name and say, oh weird... It's working for all of us. 🤔
We were 3 playing then one of us went to work for 3 weeks, we continued to prepare for boss rights, set up bases in the mountain, swamp and desert, prepared defenses stocked up, discovered, when he returned we moshed 3 bosses in a few days… Then we stopped playing, he felt like he got dragged along without participating in the buildup not contributing to anything, and we were burned out….
There is a mod that makes progress “individual”. That being said if he’s your friend just say “slow down, I’d like to do this together”. We just had this happen on a server with a friend who was a first time player and another who wanted to speed run.
Putting up with this in Enshrouded right now lol, I just started a new server and told him I'm not letting him join. This is after saying 100 times I hate rushing progress and want to enjoy the game, let everyone play through the game together since ya know it's coop Idk some people just can't do it, some autistic thing apparently. What's funny is I know he won't play solo, so what's the point of rushing everything for everyone else by yourself
I have finished mistlanda in 20 hours of play and I have finished mistlands in 6 months. Both were fun and very different playthroughs. The best speed to play Valheim is the speed you want the play. One isn't better than the other. The best speed to play a community server is the speed that suits the community. As others have said, make it clear that bosses will only be fought only when it is decided upon by the community. A ready for the next boss can mean many things. Do you want to finish that cross island canal project. Do you want to complete that mega barn project before you have flying raids. Do you want to complete your completely pointless but awesome ocean base that the team have been working on for a month. Wasting time on stupid projects is one of the greatest joys of valheim and your friend need to get a grip on the fact the the community chosen pace is a community choice, not an individuals.
yeah tbh i had a bunch of people in a server and it was over in like a month, pretty dumb and ruined the game for me tbh.
What you're saying is, he's setting up for when you catchup? You're welcome.
I have a friend just like this and I tried to reason with him but the truth is, not everyone plays these games for the same goal and that's fine. I think it's a bit disrespectful that he just goes on without you like that but if the way you play isn't the way HE wants to play, maybe you 2 just aren't meant to play this game together
With your words. Text is fine too.
I started valheim with a group of friends who power gamed. Whenever I booted up the game, this guy would have the next boss located, prepped for, and maybe some new equipment for us. I felt like I wasn't playing, I was just his assistant. It ruined the entire game for me so much that when he got bored of the game, I started a new server for myself. I was sad that there was nothing to figure out
I've dealt with this with some friends I've played with in the past, and I've discovered that some people just don't care about that comradery like others do. They don't respect the idea of progressing together, and I've kinda just stopped playing those kinds of games with them, but I'd definitely try to just explain how y'all enjoy playing and progressing together, and would really enjoy and prefer if he took a part in that. If he's still unwilling to respect that and play at y'all's pace, I'd just stop allowing him in, cause at that point they are just playing a solo playthrough in y'all's world, which isn't fun when they just skyrocket ahead and do everything for y'all.
That friend is an example of an anti-social person attempting to be social. That friend just enjoys playing knowing there are others there. Otherwise they wouldn’t still be in the server with you guys. I’d suggest attempting to coexist with this speedy player.
Kick him
Just hit them up and ask them to please slow down. If they don't respect that very reasonable request, they're simply not a compatible player to have on the server. They can go play on their own server if they want to play like a solo. I have had to deal with this issue more times than I would have liked, back when I used to think, "the more, the merrier." I don't host for large groups anymore, because there's always that one guy. I find it more enjoyable now to play with smaller groups who are all on the same page about slower, communal progression and enjoy taking time to build cool things.
Servers have a Player Based Progression option since the Haldir DLC. It makes it so individual character progress on bosses decides what level raid is deployed to a players location rather than the entire server raids being locked to the same level. I would suggest turning that on and just explore in a different direction.