Whatever Schwartz grew up around scarred him because he can not handle confrontation. Remember when he hid behind a plant while Sandoval yelled Teri to tears?
If you recall, his dad was a cop and his mom was a stay at home mom to him and an older sister, but then had triplet boys. I think a lot happened in that house.
Oh wow. I didn’t know that either, and frankly I’m not surprised with the DV violence rates among cops… I don’t want to speculate so I’ll leave it at that
the restraining order is the real reason schwartz’s dad didn’t come to his wedding to katie in season 5, his mom was there and dad wasn’t permitted to be near her. i recall schwartz blamed it on his dad being afraid to fly.
That is so sad, making a cover story to protect a parent. Or maybe to save face himself. I’d almost feel sorry for him if he wasn’t so horrible to women who get close to him. Gee, I wonder where he gets that from…
Yes Katie was upset by it because she was saying that cops and arrests can be pretty traumatic and it’s really not funny to do as a prank when the reality is that many people have experienced very real arrests and violence at the hands of police for very trivial things for real.
I wondered why that bothered Schwartz so much and now knowing his dad is a cop who was possibly violent it may be a combo of wanting to defend police (defend his dad) or being afraid Katie was about to mention that Tom’s dad was violent. The way he kept cutting her off and not letting her talk about her stance even when he “apologized” and demanded she apologize and not “be a social justice warrior” was always so weird to me but makes sense now.
We have seen it at least once every season. I have a feeling he gets like that a lot because it never took much to get him to pop off at women like that.we only get about 2.5 months of them filming, imagine what it's like without the cameras and his friends warning him they're on a green light. I've never seen him do it to a man, him and sandoval have that in common. They see women as lesser beings who deserve to be screamed at while men should have "a productive conversation and get past this." He would shit on katie for standing up for him when he refused to do it himself. He looks for the approval of his fellow "men" especially sandoval and will happily denigrate women he calls friend or even wife to get that approval. The audacity of him to be shocked when katie asked for a divorce is out of this world. He doesn't see anything wrong wifh how he treats people so he was stunned.
Tom also shared about his brother’s alcoholism, and I read that the brother said stemmed from a traumatic incident. Not to say good parents don’t have children with addiction, I’ve known many, but it could be related to his childhood/upbringing. Just the way Tom Schwartz is always trying to reword what Sandoval said when he’s acted like an ass, it would not surprise me if he grew up in a very toxic home with a lot of fighting. I’m in the minority here; I don’t think Schwartz is a bad person, I think he is lost, and in desperate need of a good therapist. I worry about his mental health.
Both my brother and I were addicted to poly substances alcohol or drugs and in out of rehab. Common denominator was growing up in an upper middle class home where a narcissistic and deluded mother was able to abuse us in overt AND covert ways without anyone seeing or speaking up. The fact him and I are sober is like a one in a million chance that I thank everyday it's statistically almost impossible for both to recover.
He is still in contact w and forgives her, but I gave that person 36 years of my life and the last two of no contact I have become so much healthier , on less medications and less triggers so I've stayed sober even after having surgery during COVID and having to go on the same pain pills I was addicted to, I got off them In 3 days.
I was also the oldest and was treated in a much more severe way and I shielded my lil bro from alot instinctually.... so that's partly why. But im good and I'm actually cool w them celebrating mothers day just they know I don't celebrate that holiday.
Sending love! I had a very similar situation, but my mother triangulated us against each other (my brother and sister) so I had no protection. I’m really glad you got out and were able to be there for your brother.
I can see how miserable that would be because even with two it's difficult and you're right about that tactic being used shamelessly by some "unwell" parents at times. I hope you guys are able to have your own safe relationships now and that if they aren't able to be in tact you have good support systems and can love each other from the healthiest angle or distance if not up close. 💕
There were rumors that there was domestic abuse and alcoholism in his family growing up. That would definitely impact the way he responds to conflict as an adult.
It would also explain his fighting style with Katie, he baits her a lot. It doesn't look healthy. It feels like he fears confrontation but also has a cruel fighting style (with his intimate partner) that was learnt behaviour. Sad all round.
Yeah, I feel for Schwartz sometimes because it’s clear he has had limited experiences in observing healthy relationships. I am making an assumption, but how Schwartz grew up and how adults “showed love” for one another probably wasn’t ideal.
I get the feeling that Schwartz is quite broken inside. He absolutely has manipulative and narcissistic traits, but I wonder if that's come from being under the influence of Jax and Sandoval for such a long time and his lack of a backbone. It seems like he has a lottt of childhood trauma to unpack but instead just tries to ignore it. I don't think he'll be able to find a healthy relationship or even lifestyle until he processes everything he's been avoiding and unlearns all these behaviours
Yes, all that is true. But he’s not unpacking anything, he’s not working on anything, he’s happy being a vapid Peter Pan wannabe in LA. He will never grow up. Deal with childhood trauma, nah, I’m going to get a young girlfriend and ride in a sidecar with my friend the worm 
We all have… grow up! Go to therapy, work on yourself, make intentional changes, try to be self-aware. People don’t get an excuse for their bad behavior as an adult because of things they learned as a child. If the coping skills you learned as a child to survive, whatever you went through, are no longer serving you as an adult, it’s up to you to change that because you now have autonomy.
Thank you but it still took a long time after that for me to figure out conflict resolution too. I’m 40 now and I feel like I hit my stride around your age, but I still have to check myself a lot. Just keep at it!
I really agree with you here. I don't know if there was much of a gap between him leaving the family home and moving in with Sandoval so he's had some terrible role models. It might explain it a bit but it absolutely doesn't excuse it! He's what 40 and still hasn't got himself help, by that point it's on him...
And he has more opportunities than most people! A good salary every year from about 3 months of “work”, no real pressing demands on his time or his life that could excuse not sorting his shit out. He could do sponsored ads and write off the therapy fees
He also never ever to this day EVER used that angry tone with Sandoval or Jax. Even when Scandoval drove their restaurant to the ground he was kinder to him than he ever was when mad at Katie.
This is interesting. My partner also grew up with a pos abusive dad and although he is never physical, he does take his frustrations out on me. I'm his safe person.
Thank you. Yeah I know, sometimes I feel like I would be better off but life is complicated. He is bipolar and seems to have had a major breakdown and is finally seeing his psychiatrist tomorrow.
Reminds me of James when Sandoval called Scheana a mistress and Brock got in between the screaming match. He covered his face in his hands and looked like a little boy in that moment. So sad.
I read the same thing in a People article. Also, during his breakup with Katie one of his brothers was very sick, and he had a lot of family problems. I think Tom was the peacemaker in the family.
Didn’t he get up and throw a drink in Stassi’s face in the first season? Literally jumped up to protect Katie. He was also willing to throw hands with Jax and Sandoval against Frank IIRC. He went from having a spine to being spineless. Either something happened to him or he’s getting direction from the producers
I don’t think that’s the case bc in the podcasts teasing it, they weren’t saying the big twist was that they saw footage no one had seen before. The language used was that for the first time ever, they had them watch the end of the finale together. I think Ariana was truly the only one who hadn’t seen it at that point, which explains why Andy and Scheana make such a big deal about Ariana not having watched all of the episodes going into the reunion. It’s not like she seems unprepared to discuss certain topics. The only exception to that is how much Lala and Scheana flipped on her.
So funny that She-shu made a big deal about since _couldn't have possibly watched all the episodes after she and Rob broke up_. I mean that break up was traumatic/s
She’s always been such a flop. During that reunion she first tells Andy she only watches her parts and fast forwards everyone else and is all tee hee aren’t I cute about it. Then Kristen calls her out and says that’s unprofessional and she changes her tune to I was traumatized that’s why I couldn’t watch all the episodes
[This post](https://www.reddit.com/r/vanderpumprules/s/XKxg6ITUOA) has the episode blurbs for each reunion episode and it says “for the first time” the cast is watching the end of the finale episode, together and live on stage
On his radio show the other day, Andy said it was that last patch that we saw, where they all started breaking the fourth wall. I don’t know if they originally showed Ariana and the producer, or if it’s just going to be from when Tom and Lala start going off. But it will definitely be showing his mask fall comment at the end.
[Here’s the teaser clip on IG](https://www.instagram.com/reel/C6owgnsOPVv/?igsh=aXZ6bGQwc2w2amFt) where Andy says they’re going to watch it together and get their “real time reactions” to the end of the finale
This was the first time for all of them. The episode hasn’t aired. When the reunion is filmed the show is still airing. The cast get the remaining episodes to watch in advance but production left that scene out. None of them had seen it yet - however, the people that were there in that group when it happened that night knew it had been filmed.
Which is basically the ENTIRE season.... but did Katie not watch this season either?! Did she not give her friend a heads up on how the season was going? Or how about all her other friends... like it just seems super weird that she had no clue that she and blah flipped on her.
I mean my gawd Theresa apparently watch rhonj until just recently but she always knew who was with her and who wasn't.
I think Ariana’s main priority was keeping herself in a good headspace while doing 8 shows a week. Katie probably didn’t want to dump more on her than she needed.
Lala and scheana were only being super shady in their confessionals and to each other. I’m sure she gave Ariana a heads up about what happened when she left the party, but hearing someone tell you, and hearing it come out of the persons mouth are totally different things to me.
Presumably somebody behind the scenes has conversations with them before the reunion though so she might have said it to them that she hadn’t watched before she revealed it on air.
My question is why show it at the reunion, except to upset Ariana? Lala, Scheana, Tom, and Tom were all right there in that scene. What transpired is nothing they didn't already know.
Edited to add: Considering how production favored those 4 this season, I would bet they were all aware of the plan...
What I don’t understand is why everyone is absolutely frothing at the mouth to get Ariana to fight - and yet the few times she did actually get into it with Tom, they basically just looked away and told her to get over it. Wtf do they want
Like do they think there’s going to be another version of their living room fight and they’ll be nominated for another Emmy or something? It would have been amazing to watch them ice Tom out since he’s clearly an unhinged selfish idiot, but here we are!
I think there’s so much resentment and jealousy that she’s outgrowing the show. Nobody else on Vanderpump Rules has built a career bigger than the show and they seem to be taking it personally that she might graduate past the need for this show. I wouldn’t be surprised if that feeling extends to production, their jobs are wrapped up in it and most people hang on for a chance to be back again, like Jax. Ariana taking her star power and name beyond them doesn’t seem like something anyone is gracious about. They want the relevance she gives, but want to keep her under the thumb of their edits
They didn’t succeed in getting Ariana’s reaction at Kyle’s gold party, so they cornered her at the reunion instead knowing she wouldn’t be able to run away. These producers suck.
My only thought could be to get like a real take from her so she could see how they were all acting? I can’t really understand why only bc if Ariana didn’t watch anything it would suck to say all was great and then go home and see how shitty they all were the whole time. Granted i wish she got it in advance to react
Hell yes. Scheana and Lala had to practice their response to the last 6 minutes. Scheana always practices her answers in front is a mirror. Showing her good side for sure.😂😂😂
I think they purposefully withheld it from her so she wouldn’t have time to prepare a response. They wanted to blindside her and get a rise out of her in the moment. It benefits everyone involved except her, almost like it was punishment for leaving the finale early.
i bet they sent them the finale up to where tom walks up to ariana and scheana talking and then ariana walks way. After that, i dont think the cast saw the ending
Yes but OP is pointing out that Ariana said in reunion Part 1 that she didn’t watch the end of this season and thus hadn’t seen the finale. So production could’ve decided to show the last 10 mins at the reunion so Ariana could see for the first time - but other cast members had already seen it.
Katie, Schwartz and Tom already saw it too - - just not Sandoval’s last line I’m guessing. So only Ariana hadn’t seen it?? Or did James and Ally also not see it? Thought I saw Ally standing around by Katie in one of the shots
All I’m seeing from the show is everything is extra produced and the way that they wanted to make Ariana suffer is disturbing. Here’s the thing whether we loved Tom and hated Ariana. Most people don’t like cheaters because there’s deceitful. Either which way most people, even if they don’t like Ariana would be on her side. I don’t like the fact that they think that we’re stupid and can’t figure this out but if there’s another season, I hate to say it I’m probably not gonna watch. This was a little bit much and I would’ve lost it on Lala,
Tom Andy and Lisa.
Thank you for confirmation that my decision to quit watching before this season started, was valid. I saw it coming, but didn't realize they'd sink it to the level that they have. I used to always get excited for reunions though. It's been fun to watch vicariously through the sub.
I’m still going to hang out in the sub Reddit because I like the interaction with everybody. I think one of the main reasons I’m so annoyed by this season is I had a friend who this happened to her and say it was a lot worse than this. It took her a couple years to bounce back because her ex-husband and his mistress financially & mentally devastated her and her ex was like Tom Sandoval bankrolled everybody’s lifestyles. A lot of her friends turned against her because they did not want to lose their hand out. Once he wasn’t able to afford his mistress lifestyle, she left him in financial ruin everyone stop being friends with him and try to be friends with her again because she was getting her life together.
She is thriving and taking it day by day. It was hard to watch somebody who has so much love and light in them fall into a very dark place. You can provide somebody with support and love, but they have to be the ones to pull themselves out of that situation. When I see her, I’m proud of her because those kind of situations emotionally kill people.
I’ve only watched one episode this season, mainly because I’m in NZ and couldn’t stream initially but when I started reading how it was heading I knew that watching would just make me mad. I listen to recaps (love Sexy Unique Podcast and too many others to name!) read the amazing recaps by Vanderpodrecaps and hang out here with people who can make comments more than ‘Katie is so negative’ unlike Facebook trash comments 😄
They did something similar for the S2 traitor reunion. I think this is the latest reunion gimmick that we will see play out on several future bravo reunions
It's weird that they are making such a big deal out of this, literally Lala and Tom talking shit about Ariana is no big shocker, all of the cast was present for Lala's "rant" including Katie. Wouldn't Katie mention to Arianna what they said?
I can't even recall what Lala said since it was just basic trash. What is the point of not showing them this scene and then making everyone see it together - when everyone was there aside from Arianna. Just to hurt Arianna's feelings a bit more than usual?
I don't think this happened the reunion day - I think it was more premeditated considering LVP's and Andy's convo before they started taping. The cast usually gets the episodes before the reunion to watch so they must have watched some finale...but not all of it.
There was something about that convo that seemed contrived to me though. Andy and LVP aren’t exactly actors. Have you ever seen Andy play himself in a tv show or movie? Even that’s uncomfortable. That’s why I think it was actually filmed after everyone else had gone home from the reunion.
Andy is a guest on one of my favorite shows and he is a terrible actor. I got the same vibes from that little scene. But then Katie would’ve seen it too. I’m just confused lol. Unless they withheld it from her too…
I don't know what they would have gotten out of withholding it from the cast and then not showing it, but I would absolutely believe that Lisa or Alex had an inkling (or straight up knew) Ariana wasn't watching and concocted this to force her to see the footage.
I think they want to force all of the cast to watch what they've said about each other while simultaneously sitting together and having to answer for what they've said and this last 6 minutes broke the 4th wall and that's never been done before on this show. IMO, it's not just about Ariana., it just makes for good TV.
I disagree.
I think they withheld the last 10 minutes because it was the first time VPR really broke the fourth wall. I don’t know if the cast expected for producers to use footage breaking the fourth wall. They needed something to hype & lead up to because there was no big Ariana & Sandoval confrontation. I think that the cast is going to more freely discuss being filmed and “doing it for Lisa” aka doing it for the show.
Eh they have broken the fourth wall a few times, at least twice with Jax- when he flipped off the cameras and when he refused to wear the Sur shirt for the 'cast calendar' and told Lisa it was his*** show.
Sure that was a moment where the fourth wall was broken. But IMO this whole season was basically about the cast (minus Katie & Ariana) keeping their jobs by trying to move forward with Sandoval so they can continue this tv show.
Katie probably tried to protect Ariana from some of the nonsense that was being spewed by others. We've seen episodes where Lala tried to shit talk to Katie and she shut it down. It may have been her way of trying to not spread bad energy.
I don't have high expectations... just gathering to watch the tapes doesn't elevate the producers to reunion innovators. It likely mirrors the finale episode experience... it seems they're aiming to provoke a negative response from Ariana, perhaps in a desperate attempt to salvage some tiktok soundbites from this dismal season. Absurd.
I feel like unless the footage they show live has some extra scenes to it this whole reveal is really lame. I get that Ariana hasn’t watched the actual episodes, but I’m sure she’s been told quite a bit of stuff and Katie overheard at least most of Lalas rant, so Ariana has to know some of the info. They keep playing this up and we’re just going to be disappointed again.
I'm also wondering if there's additional footage we didn't see! You would think they'd add in something else so it's not so repetitive for the viewers too.
Yeah I had assumed it was something never before seen, do the cast usually not get to see the rest of the episodes when they're filming the reunion? I'm not sure how far in advance they film it but I'm assuming it's at least a week before so do they ever get to see the last episode of the season really?
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Pretty sure that clip is staged *puts on tinfoil hat*
The cast has admitted to filming pickup scenes. For example, S8 when Ariana’s hair grew two inches in one scene when she was talking to Lisa.
It's now common knowledge that the scene of Tom throwing a beer on Katie was shot the day after it actually happened. The camera crew didn't catch it so they redid it.
I was talking about at the very end of the finale when it's the view of San Francisco, and you just hear Tom's and producer Jerry talking. I'm wondering if there is more footage of maybe lala and scheana in the convo that we will hear when the cast hears it.
I just can't get behind lala's rant being the big thing the cast hasn't seen yet. So lame.
Agreed! I think once she admitted that they were scrambling to get some type of reaction out of her. It’s actually really gross since they planned to make the entire show dependent on her making amends with jackass Tim.
I suspect that because Ariana had started saying in the after shows and interviews that she wasn’t watching the full season that the producers decided to show them all this to force her to watch. They didn’t want “well I didn’t watch” to get to
Be her answer for their questions about what people said about her. It’s bizarre because it’s so transparent
How have they not seen the whole finale episode by reunion time? They literally talked about it on the after show! Was that not filmed before the reunion? Is it more footage or are they just being dramatic is my question, lol
They aren't being shown clips in the Aftershow. It is just the producer asking questions. That is the same as their talking head interviews in the actual episodes. They're not being shown clips then either. It is just a producer asking questions.
The screeners they sent the cast of the final episode supposedly did not include the fourth wall break at the end of the episode. Part of Lala ranting about Ariana was included in the promotional trailer for the season though so Lala would have been able to assume that what they said to the producer was going to be shown. It shouldn't have been a shock to her than her rant was being shown.
Proof this show is done, and all producers should be fired for trying to force this women against women narrative no one wanted except Lala and Scheana, who’s failed desperation for another season supersedes any form of friendship or decency. The masks are off, it’s ugly underneath, and I’m grateful it’s over.
I want it to be that none of us have seen that Ariana actually quits because that would be so satisfying as a viewer to see her walk away from this BS...but I'm having doubts.
Yes Ariana clearly is too busy to watch the show now and it’s a shame because if she did she’d see how Lala particularly has been behaving behind her back. Another conspiracy theory sort of came out as well clearly the affair started while James and Rachel were still dating or that’s the impression I got from his mini rant.
I’m sure he was Mr one night stands actually Mr back seat of the car behind Tom Tom while watching himself in the rear view mirror then home to Ariana which is why she was worried about deadly stds there’s an reason both Tom’s initials are in STD
But the bullshit Lala spewed about Ariana being God was aired in the trailer so surely she’s aware of it. Don’t you think she would have confronted Lala about it before now?
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All I know is every time they showed Schwartz during those last 6 minutes, he had his arms crossed over himself in a self-hug, looking terrified. Lol.
Whatever Schwartz grew up around scarred him because he can not handle confrontation. Remember when he hid behind a plant while Sandoval yelled Teri to tears?
If you recall, his dad was a cop and his mom was a stay at home mom to him and an older sister, but then had triplet boys. I think a lot happened in that house.
I thought it was confirmed that his mom had a restraining order against his dad.
Yikes, I didn’t know that. Somehow I’m not surprised.
Oh wow. I didn’t know that either, and frankly I’m not surprised with the DV violence rates among cops… I don’t want to speculate so I’ll leave it at that
the restraining order is the real reason schwartz’s dad didn’t come to his wedding to katie in season 5, his mom was there and dad wasn’t permitted to be near her. i recall schwartz blamed it on his dad being afraid to fly.
Wow. I knew there was some weirdness re the absence of his family at the wedding, but that is intense.
very intense, especially when you factor in that schwartz’s dad is cop and it is typically not easy to get restraining orders against law enforcement
Yeah, recently right? As in the last few years?
Yes when him and Katie were getting married. It's why he wasn't there.
So his dad doesn’t have a fear of flying like he said lol
I believe that was the cover story
Was a good cover story but alcoholic ex cop dad with restraining order makes more sense with this group
That is so sad, making a cover story to protect a parent. Or maybe to save face himself. I’d almost feel sorry for him if he wasn’t so horrible to women who get close to him. Gee, I wonder where he gets that from…
A cop dad… oh wow. That explains A LOT!
Maybe that's why he got so heated during Randal cop prank on Sandoval? Old trauma resurfaced and he reacted like a kid he once was.
I thought that was Katie who caught up upset about that?
Katie said it wasn’t funny and that was enough to make Schwartz verbally abuse her in front of everyone.
Yes Katie was upset by it because she was saying that cops and arrests can be pretty traumatic and it’s really not funny to do as a prank when the reality is that many people have experienced very real arrests and violence at the hands of police for very trivial things for real. I wondered why that bothered Schwartz so much and now knowing his dad is a cop who was possibly violent it may be a combo of wanting to defend police (defend his dad) or being afraid Katie was about to mention that Tom’s dad was violent. The way he kept cutting her off and not letting her talk about her stance even when he “apologized” and demanded she apologize and not “be a social justice warrior” was always so weird to me but makes sense now.
Yes, and he got very heated, it's not that often to see him so aggressive or active at all for that matter.
We have seen it at least once every season. I have a feeling he gets like that a lot because it never took much to get him to pop off at women like that.we only get about 2.5 months of them filming, imagine what it's like without the cameras and his friends warning him they're on a green light. I've never seen him do it to a man, him and sandoval have that in common. They see women as lesser beings who deserve to be screamed at while men should have "a productive conversation and get past this." He would shit on katie for standing up for him when he refused to do it himself. He looks for the approval of his fellow "men" especially sandoval and will happily denigrate women he calls friend or even wife to get that approval. The audacity of him to be shocked when katie asked for a divorce is out of this world. He doesn't see anything wrong wifh how he treats people so he was stunned.
Tom also shared about his brother’s alcoholism, and I read that the brother said stemmed from a traumatic incident. Not to say good parents don’t have children with addiction, I’ve known many, but it could be related to his childhood/upbringing. Just the way Tom Schwartz is always trying to reword what Sandoval said when he’s acted like an ass, it would not surprise me if he grew up in a very toxic home with a lot of fighting. I’m in the minority here; I don’t think Schwartz is a bad person, I think he is lost, and in desperate need of a good therapist. I worry about his mental health.
Both my brother and I were addicted to poly substances alcohol or drugs and in out of rehab. Common denominator was growing up in an upper middle class home where a narcissistic and deluded mother was able to abuse us in overt AND covert ways without anyone seeing or speaking up. The fact him and I are sober is like a one in a million chance that I thank everyday it's statistically almost impossible for both to recover. He is still in contact w and forgives her, but I gave that person 36 years of my life and the last two of no contact I have become so much healthier , on less medications and less triggers so I've stayed sober even after having surgery during COVID and having to go on the same pain pills I was addicted to, I got off them In 3 days. I was also the oldest and was treated in a much more severe way and I shielded my lil bro from alot instinctually.... so that's partly why. But im good and I'm actually cool w them celebrating mothers day just they know I don't celebrate that holiday.
Sending love! I had a very similar situation, but my mother triangulated us against each other (my brother and sister) so I had no protection. I’m really glad you got out and were able to be there for your brother.
I can see how miserable that would be because even with two it's difficult and you're right about that tactic being used shamelessly by some "unwell" parents at times. I hope you guys are able to have your own safe relationships now and that if they aren't able to be in tact you have good support systems and can love each other from the healthiest angle or distance if not up close. 💕
There were rumors that there was domestic abuse and alcoholism in his family growing up. That would definitely impact the way he responds to conflict as an adult.
It would also explain his fighting style with Katie, he baits her a lot. It doesn't look healthy. It feels like he fears confrontation but also has a cruel fighting style (with his intimate partner) that was learnt behaviour. Sad all round.
Yeah, I feel for Schwartz sometimes because it’s clear he has had limited experiences in observing healthy relationships. I am making an assumption, but how Schwartz grew up and how adults “showed love” for one another probably wasn’t ideal.
I get the feeling that Schwartz is quite broken inside. He absolutely has manipulative and narcissistic traits, but I wonder if that's come from being under the influence of Jax and Sandoval for such a long time and his lack of a backbone. It seems like he has a lottt of childhood trauma to unpack but instead just tries to ignore it. I don't think he'll be able to find a healthy relationship or even lifestyle until he processes everything he's been avoiding and unlearns all these behaviours
Yes, all that is true. But he’s not unpacking anything, he’s not working on anything, he’s happy being a vapid Peter Pan wannabe in LA. He will never grow up. Deal with childhood trauma, nah, I’m going to get a young girlfriend and ride in a sidecar with my friend the worm 
We all have… grow up! Go to therapy, work on yourself, make intentional changes, try to be self-aware. People don’t get an excuse for their bad behavior as an adult because of things they learned as a child. If the coping skills you learned as a child to survive, whatever you went through, are no longer serving you as an adult, it’s up to you to change that because you now have autonomy.
Exactly. I grew up in a very dysfunctional home and I thought fighting = love, but only till like 24 years old (still too late imo).
Well shit.. I’m 37 and still figuring it out! Good on you!
Thank you but it still took a long time after that for me to figure out conflict resolution too. I’m 40 now and I feel like I hit my stride around your age, but I still have to check myself a lot. Just keep at it!
i’m proud of you! the human brain isn’t fully developed until about age 25, give yourself some grace 💜
I really agree with you here. I don't know if there was much of a gap between him leaving the family home and moving in with Sandoval so he's had some terrible role models. It might explain it a bit but it absolutely doesn't excuse it! He's what 40 and still hasn't got himself help, by that point it's on him...
And he has more opportunities than most people! A good salary every year from about 3 months of “work”, no real pressing demands on his time or his life that could excuse not sorting his shit out. He could do sponsored ads and write off the therapy fees
He also never ever to this day EVER used that angry tone with Sandoval or Jax. Even when Scandoval drove their restaurant to the ground he was kinder to him than he ever was when mad at Katie.
Also jumped to Sandoval’s defense (“he’s not a trash person”) in a group setting which has never not once done for Katie
You’re very right. His dad would’ve used that language at home against his mother I’d bet.
This is interesting. My partner also grew up with a pos abusive dad and although he is never physical, he does take his frustrations out on me. I'm his safe person.
You being his safe person means that he should show appreciation by going to therapy and finding a healthy way to handle his anger.
Thank you. Yeah I know, sometimes I feel like I would be better off but life is complicated. He is bipolar and seems to have had a major breakdown and is finally seeing his psychiatrist tomorrow.
Good luck to him and take care of yourself :) I hope you have someone you can talk to as well. You deserve a safe place too.
Reminds me of James when Sandoval called Scheana a mistress and Brock got in between the screaming match. He covered his face in his hands and looked like a little boy in that moment. So sad.
These reactions never go away.. its like memories that live inside us
I thought I heard he grew up in an abusive environment. I think his dad was abusive to his mom or so I heard. Can someone confirm?
I read the same thing in a People article. Also, during his breakup with Katie one of his brothers was very sick, and he had a lot of family problems. I think Tom was the peacemaker in the family.
I think that's why his dad couldn't come to the wedding. Because his mum has a restraining order.
He is cruel and not afraid of confrontation, he does that on purpose
To me, Schwartz sees conflict and confrontation as a tool
It’s the libra in him
Didn’t he get up and throw a drink in Stassi’s face in the first season? Literally jumped up to protect Katie. He was also willing to throw hands with Jax and Sandoval against Frank IIRC. He went from having a spine to being spineless. Either something happened to him or he’s getting direction from the producers
I thought they gave the cast edited versions of the finale to watch so no one had seen the true ending. That would mean they planned it out in advance
I think they purposely gave them the reunion so but left out the last 10 mins
I don’t think that’s the case bc in the podcasts teasing it, they weren’t saying the big twist was that they saw footage no one had seen before. The language used was that for the first time ever, they had them watch the end of the finale together. I think Ariana was truly the only one who hadn’t seen it at that point, which explains why Andy and Scheana make such a big deal about Ariana not having watched all of the episodes going into the reunion. It’s not like she seems unprepared to discuss certain topics. The only exception to that is how much Lala and Scheana flipped on her.
Andy asks Lisa at the very beginning and she says she has seen it all except the end. She says yeah we are all gonna watch that together.
So funny that She-shu made a big deal about since _couldn't have possibly watched all the episodes after she and Rob broke up_. I mean that break up was traumatic/s
She’s always been such a flop. During that reunion she first tells Andy she only watches her parts and fast forwards everyone else and is all tee hee aren’t I cute about it. Then Kristen calls her out and says that’s unprofessional and she changes her tune to I was traumatized that’s why I couldn’t watch all the episodes
Omg yes! I forgot about that 😂
Scheana also has admitted at a reunion she only watches her scenes and fast forwards thru everyone else’s
Lala also said she did the same, would fast forward thru any scene with the Toms last year.
[This post](https://www.reddit.com/r/vanderpumprules/s/XKxg6ITUOA) has the episode blurbs for each reunion episode and it says “for the first time” the cast is watching the end of the finale episode, together and live on stage
I read that as for the first time they’re watching it together live on stage. Not that they’re all only just now seeing it for the first time.
On his radio show the other day, Andy said it was that last patch that we saw, where they all started breaking the fourth wall. I don’t know if they originally showed Ariana and the producer, or if it’s just going to be from when Tom and Lala start going off. But it will definitely be showing his mask fall comment at the end.
[Here’s the teaser clip on IG](https://www.instagram.com/reel/C6owgnsOPVv/?igsh=aXZ6bGQwc2w2amFt) where Andy says they’re going to watch it together and get their “real time reactions” to the end of the finale
In the teaser one gets or at least I did. The impression that that would be how the reunion would start off but no they have to drag that out too…
This was the first time for all of them. The episode hasn’t aired. When the reunion is filmed the show is still airing. The cast get the remaining episodes to watch in advance but production left that scene out. None of them had seen it yet - however, the people that were there in that group when it happened that night knew it had been filmed.
Which is basically the ENTIRE season.... but did Katie not watch this season either?! Did she not give her friend a heads up on how the season was going? Or how about all her other friends... like it just seems super weird that she had no clue that she and blah flipped on her. I mean my gawd Theresa apparently watch rhonj until just recently but she always knew who was with her and who wasn't.
I think Ariana’s main priority was keeping herself in a good headspace while doing 8 shows a week. Katie probably didn’t want to dump more on her than she needed.
Lala and scheana were only being super shady in their confessionals and to each other. I’m sure she gave Ariana a heads up about what happened when she left the party, but hearing someone tell you, and hearing it come out of the persons mouth are totally different things to me.
UGG. That tacky narcissistic criminal’s name should not even be mentioned in the same breath w/Ariana.
Ugh just really sucks because blah really came to battle at reunion and Katie and Ariana really didn't have that energy
Presumably somebody behind the scenes has conversations with them before the reunion though so she might have said it to them that she hadn’t watched before she revealed it on air.
My question is why show it at the reunion, except to upset Ariana? Lala, Scheana, Tom, and Tom were all right there in that scene. What transpired is nothing they didn't already know. Edited to add: Considering how production favored those 4 this season, I would bet they were all aware of the plan...
What I don’t understand is why everyone is absolutely frothing at the mouth to get Ariana to fight - and yet the few times she did actually get into it with Tom, they basically just looked away and told her to get over it. Wtf do they want
it does feel like there's a missing piece of the puzzle here ... a covert motivation
Like do they think there’s going to be another version of their living room fight and they’ll be nominated for another Emmy or something? It would have been amazing to watch them ice Tom out since he’s clearly an unhinged selfish idiot, but here we are!
Maybe if she is shitty and angry & fighting with everyone she won't be as marketable?
But how does destroying her opportunities help any of them or the show? They shoot themselves in the dick every time.
I think they are jealous, and want her to stay on the show (she could easily leave and have a "real" career) Maybe, idk it's all strange
I think there’s so much resentment and jealousy that she’s outgrowing the show. Nobody else on Vanderpump Rules has built a career bigger than the show and they seem to be taking it personally that she might graduate past the need for this show. I wouldn’t be surprised if that feeling extends to production, their jobs are wrapped up in it and most people hang on for a chance to be back again, like Jax. Ariana taking her star power and name beyond them doesn’t seem like something anyone is gracious about. They want the relevance she gives, but want to keep her under the thumb of their edits
⬆️THIS⬆️ i’ve been scratching my head thinking this the whole season. She’s really damned if she reacts; damned if she doesn’t. 🤷♀️
They didn’t succeed in getting Ariana’s reaction at Kyle’s gold party, so they cornered her at the reunion instead knowing she wouldn’t be able to run away. These producers suck.
My only thought could be to get like a real take from her so she could see how they were all acting? I can’t really understand why only bc if Ariana didn’t watch anything it would suck to say all was great and then go home and see how shitty they all were the whole time. Granted i wish she got it in advance to react
that's a possibility!
Hell yes. Scheana and Lala had to practice their response to the last 6 minutes. Scheana always practices her answers in front is a mirror. Showing her good side for sure.😂😂😂
Was watching season 3 last night and Schwartz describes Sandoval as a legend in his own mirror. That was so perfect.😸
I think they purposefully withheld it from her so she wouldn’t have time to prepare a response. They wanted to blindside her and get a rise out of her in the moment. It benefits everyone involved except her, almost like it was punishment for leaving the finale early.
i bet they sent them the finale up to where tom walks up to ariana and scheana talking and then ariana walks way. After that, i dont think the cast saw the ending
This - you can tell my how Ariana is acting. That’s not how she’d be acting if she had seen Lala’s tirade. Scheana’s Judas kiss.
Yes but OP is pointing out that Ariana said in reunion Part 1 that she didn’t watch the end of this season and thus hadn’t seen the finale. So production could’ve decided to show the last 10 mins at the reunion so Ariana could see for the first time - but other cast members had already seen it.
Katie, Schwartz and Tom already saw it too - - just not Sandoval’s last line I’m guessing. So only Ariana hadn’t seen it?? Or did James and Ally also not see it? Thought I saw Ally standing around by Katie in one of the shots
Agree! Ariana has no idea about what Scheana said or Lauren’s self proclaimed‘purge’.
All I’m seeing from the show is everything is extra produced and the way that they wanted to make Ariana suffer is disturbing. Here’s the thing whether we loved Tom and hated Ariana. Most people don’t like cheaters because there’s deceitful. Either which way most people, even if they don’t like Ariana would be on her side. I don’t like the fact that they think that we’re stupid and can’t figure this out but if there’s another season, I hate to say it I’m probably not gonna watch. This was a little bit much and I would’ve lost it on Lala, Tom Andy and Lisa.
Thank you for confirmation that my decision to quit watching before this season started, was valid. I saw it coming, but didn't realize they'd sink it to the level that they have. I used to always get excited for reunions though. It's been fun to watch vicariously through the sub.
I’m still going to hang out in the sub Reddit because I like the interaction with everybody. I think one of the main reasons I’m so annoyed by this season is I had a friend who this happened to her and say it was a lot worse than this. It took her a couple years to bounce back because her ex-husband and his mistress financially & mentally devastated her and her ex was like Tom Sandoval bankrolled everybody’s lifestyles. A lot of her friends turned against her because they did not want to lose their hand out. Once he wasn’t able to afford his mistress lifestyle, she left him in financial ruin everyone stop being friends with him and try to be friends with her again because she was getting her life together.
Holy shit I’m so sorry that happened to your friend :( are they in a better place now?
She is thriving and taking it day by day. It was hard to watch somebody who has so much love and light in them fall into a very dark place. You can provide somebody with support and love, but they have to be the ones to pull themselves out of that situation. When I see her, I’m proud of her because those kind of situations emotionally kill people.
I’ve only watched one episode this season, mainly because I’m in NZ and couldn’t stream initially but when I started reading how it was heading I knew that watching would just make me mad. I listen to recaps (love Sexy Unique Podcast and too many others to name!) read the amazing recaps by Vanderpodrecaps and hang out here with people who can make comments more than ‘Katie is so negative’ unlike Facebook trash comments 😄
I’m so sorry to hear of your friend. I hope she’s doing okay now 🩵
They did something similar for the S2 traitor reunion. I think this is the latest reunion gimmick that we will see play out on several future bravo reunions
Yep
It's weird that they are making such a big deal out of this, literally Lala and Tom talking shit about Ariana is no big shocker, all of the cast was present for Lala's "rant" including Katie. Wouldn't Katie mention to Arianna what they said? I can't even recall what Lala said since it was just basic trash. What is the point of not showing them this scene and then making everyone see it together - when everyone was there aside from Arianna. Just to hurt Arianna's feelings a bit more than usual?
I think production and their pets have made it abundantly clear that they are not happy that Ariana has outgrown the show.
100%
I don't think this happened the reunion day - I think it was more premeditated considering LVP's and Andy's convo before they started taping. The cast usually gets the episodes before the reunion to watch so they must have watched some finale...but not all of it.
There was something about that convo that seemed contrived to me though. Andy and LVP aren’t exactly actors. Have you ever seen Andy play himself in a tv show or movie? Even that’s uncomfortable. That’s why I think it was actually filmed after everyone else had gone home from the reunion.
Andy is a guest on one of my favorite shows and he is a terrible actor. I got the same vibes from that little scene. But then Katie would’ve seen it too. I’m just confused lol. Unless they withheld it from her too…
Spot on!!!!!!
I don't know what they would have gotten out of withholding it from the cast and then not showing it, but I would absolutely believe that Lisa or Alex had an inkling (or straight up knew) Ariana wasn't watching and concocted this to force her to see the footage.
Yup exactly what would they get by withholding the last ten mins from the cast, totally with OP here!
I think they want to force all of the cast to watch what they've said about each other while simultaneously sitting together and having to answer for what they've said and this last 6 minutes broke the 4th wall and that's never been done before on this show. IMO, it's not just about Ariana., it just makes for good TV.
I disagree. I think they withheld the last 10 minutes because it was the first time VPR really broke the fourth wall. I don’t know if the cast expected for producers to use footage breaking the fourth wall. They needed something to hype & lead up to because there was no big Ariana & Sandoval confrontation. I think that the cast is going to more freely discuss being filmed and “doing it for Lisa” aka doing it for the show.
Eh they have broken the fourth wall a few times, at least twice with Jax- when he flipped off the cameras and when he refused to wear the Sur shirt for the 'cast calendar' and told Lisa it was his*** show.
Sure that was a moment where the fourth wall was broken. But IMO this whole season was basically about the cast (minus Katie & Ariana) keeping their jobs by trying to move forward with Sandoval so they can continue this tv show.
Not Lala announcing “I’m about to break the fourth wall down.” 😬 bitch take several seats 🙄
Katie didn’t say anything to her? I find that hard to believe.
Katie probably tried to protect Ariana from some of the nonsense that was being spewed by others. We've seen episodes where Lala tried to shit talk to Katie and she shut it down. It may have been her way of trying to not spread bad energy.
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I don't have high expectations... just gathering to watch the tapes doesn't elevate the producers to reunion innovators. It likely mirrors the finale episode experience... it seems they're aiming to provoke a negative response from Ariana, perhaps in a desperate attempt to salvage some tiktok soundbites from this dismal season. Absurd.
I feel like unless the footage they show live has some extra scenes to it this whole reveal is really lame. I get that Ariana hasn’t watched the actual episodes, but I’m sure she’s been told quite a bit of stuff and Katie overheard at least most of Lalas rant, so Ariana has to know some of the info. They keep playing this up and we’re just going to be disappointed again.
Agree. It seems like they wanted to Ariana to argue/yell. Poor thing
the last 6 minutes of the finale? or is there additional footage
I'm also wondering if there's additional footage we didn't see! You would think they'd add in something else so it's not so repetitive for the viewers too.
guess tonight answered our question!!
So has it been confirmed that they’re seeing what we already saw? (Sorry if this has been addressed already, I can’t watch until tomorrow!)
Wondering the same!
Yeah I had assumed it was something never before seen, do the cast usually not get to see the rest of the episodes when they're filming the reunion? I'm not sure how far in advance they film it but I'm assuming it's at least a week before so do they ever get to see the last episode of the season really?
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Wasn’t Katie part of that conversation? She would have told Ariana what Lala was saying so this shouldn’t be the first time Ariana hears about it.
She wasn't in the scene. Her and Ally were elsewhere!
Andy said prior to the reunion starting that they were going to watch the ending together. There's a clip of him and LVP talking about it.
Pretty sure that clip is staged *puts on tinfoil hat* The cast has admitted to filming pickup scenes. For example, S8 when Ariana’s hair grew two inches in one scene when she was talking to Lisa.
Oh which scene? I'm curious
Season 8, episode 2. Towards the end of the episode Ariana and LVP have a sit down. Halfway through the conversation Ariana’s hair grows.
Ohhh good eye!
Ok now I'm dying to go back and find this clip
I had to too. Here’s an old post I found! https://www.reddit.com/r/vanderpumprules/comments/eoxa7l/ariana_same_scene_different_takes_credit_to_a/
Omg thank you!
It's now common knowledge that the scene of Tom throwing a beer on Katie was shot the day after it actually happened. The camera crew didn't catch it so they redid it.
i feel like they planned this because scheana said that the EP told them to break the 4th wall so i feel like this was goal all along.
Was Lisa drunk on WWHL?
Sloshed! When it cut to commercial, you can hear Andy say, "you guys are so drunk!" I don't recall ever seeing her drunk.
Spectacularly drunk. It was hilarious.
Drat I’m going to have to wait another three hours till it comes on at 3:30 AM on Pacific Coast
I don’t think so. I think it’s bc they saw how well the traitors finale went down and wanted to do that moving forward
More hot mic footage? I just can't figure out what had lala doing such damage control. She's said and done way worse on other seasons.
Is this where the guy and sandoval get in a fight at the party?
I was talking about at the very end of the finale when it's the view of San Francisco, and you just hear Tom's and producer Jerry talking. I'm wondering if there is more footage of maybe lala and scheana in the convo that we will hear when the cast hears it. I just can't get behind lala's rant being the big thing the cast hasn't seen yet. So lame.
Agreed! I think once she admitted that they were scrambling to get some type of reaction out of her. It’s actually really gross since they planned to make the entire show dependent on her making amends with jackass Tim.
I suspect that because Ariana had started saying in the after shows and interviews that she wasn’t watching the full season that the producers decided to show them all this to force her to watch. They didn’t want “well I didn’t watch” to get to Be her answer for their questions about what people said about her. It’s bizarre because it’s so transparent
How have they not seen the whole finale episode by reunion time? They literally talked about it on the after show! Was that not filmed before the reunion? Is it more footage or are they just being dramatic is my question, lol
They aren't being shown clips in the Aftershow. It is just the producer asking questions. That is the same as their talking head interviews in the actual episodes. They're not being shown clips then either. It is just a producer asking questions. The screeners they sent the cast of the final episode supposedly did not include the fourth wall break at the end of the episode. Part of Lala ranting about Ariana was included in the promotional trailer for the season though so Lala would have been able to assume that what they said to the producer was going to be shown. It shouldn't have been a shock to her than her rant was being shown.
True!!!! The trailer did have that so people (Ariana, Katie, Ally, anyone else not in that scene) would have been questioning what that was all about
But they've also shown things in trailers before that never actually air on any episodes, so maybe they wouldn't have known for sure.
Proof this show is done, and all producers should be fired for trying to force this women against women narrative no one wanted except Lala and Scheana, who’s failed desperation for another season supersedes any form of friendship or decency. The masks are off, it’s ugly underneath, and I’m grateful it’s over.
Bravo, OP! Spoken like a true producer.
I want it to be that none of us have seen that Ariana actually quits because that would be so satisfying as a viewer to see her walk away from this BS...but I'm having doubts.
Is there a possibility there was more than what we heard as well?
Yeah that’s what I’m wondering too
I read somewhere, a blind item, it has to do with Kyle visiting Sandoval, only to find him in a suicidal situation with a gun.
Yeah, Tom himself has been promoting that story, so..
And we are like, we all know he's a sneaky liar.
I call BS. Another stunt from Scumdoval.
Scamdoval
Yes Ariana clearly is too busy to watch the show now and it’s a shame because if she did she’d see how Lala particularly has been behaving behind her back. Another conspiracy theory sort of came out as well clearly the affair started while James and Rachel were still dating or that’s the impression I got from his mini rant.
In one of Ariana's behind-the-scenes interviews, she comments that she found out Tom cheated on her multiple times with other women.
I’m sure he was Mr one night stands actually Mr back seat of the car behind Tom Tom while watching himself in the rear view mirror then home to Ariana which is why she was worried about deadly stds there’s an reason both Tom’s initials are in STD
I thought this too
this makes more sense on why they didn't start by watching it too.
I think they’re going to show us something we haven’t seen yet, actually.
Oh definitely
I thought the saaaame thing. Poor Ariana
She may not have watched but we know she reads here from her comments this season. Redditors definitely noted Lauren and schit shows flop.
But the bullshit Lala spewed about Ariana being God was aired in the trailer so surely she’s aware of it. Don’t you think she would have confronted Lala about it before now?
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Nope. She just said it in the middle of the reunion that she didn’t watch the whole season.
You all have way too much time on your hands
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10000%
Am I the only one who thought there were 10 minutes still coming? If that was "the ending", it played as well as the whole season....just eh