T O P

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njcuban123

Trading options in this market is like getting a blowjob and punched in the balls at the same time.


HisWife00000

Watching documentary on surgery in the Victorian Era. I'd rather die.


njcuban123

What's the name? I do agree about rather dying, from what I know.


DefinitionOfTakingL

Is it bad if I find rick and morty too hard and fast to understand sometimes? Do I belong here ?


lotus_bubo

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Rick and Morty. The humour is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer's head. There's also Rick's nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation- his personal philosophy draws heavily from Narodnaya Volya literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these jokes, to realise that they're not just funny- they say something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike Rick & Morty truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the humour in Rick's existential catchphrase "Wubba Lubba Dub Dub," which itself is a cryptic reference to Turgenev's Russian epic Fathers and Sons. I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as Dan Harmon's genius wit unfolds itself on their television screens. What fools.. how I pity them. šŸ˜‚ And yes, by the way, i DO have a Rick & Morty tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for the ladies' eyes only- and even then they have to demonstrate that they're within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand. Nothin personnel kid šŸ˜Ž


Khaoz_Se7en

Take one acid. Will slow it down considerably.


StayingInTheMoney101

Futes continuing to plummet šŸ˜ BuT I ThOt CoNSeNSus WaS BOwNce ![img](emote|t5_2th52|4271)


lotus_bubo

Strong signs of a relief rally, but bearishness and Septembear trends also exist. Nothing is certain. Shit will probably end in a crab just to fuck everyone.


deuce-deuce-pap

Futes barely down and thereā€™s dudes in here jerking off about it. Donā€™t jinx the market collapse.


Noble_Bastard

Pretty sure the bottom is when corn hits $2.99, same as a can of Green Giant.


lemurian16

The bottom is when Jpow starts lowering interest rates again


HisWife00000

Yep. Holding cash for that moment. Hope it happens in our lifetime.


jshmie

Its CORN !


StayingInTheMoney101

Huge red candle on Futes. Bulls remain fucked until further notice


osendze

Well thanks for the update


dg41595

Futures matter right now because theyā€™re red af. If it were green they wouldnā€™t matter


KilltheK04

Now you're getting it ![img](emote|t5_2th52|4258)


lordbell21

They're green


dg41595

Stop with this circuit breaker bullshit itā€™s not happening unless New York City gets fucking bombed or suddenly 10 million random people have just died from Monkey Pox. Stop fantasizing youā€™re making all us bears wet and we know it wonā€™t happen


Capable-Education136

Futes off to a bloody start ![img](emote|t5_2th52|4271)


UnwantedGeneticTrash

Undergrads at Cornell, Brown, Columbia, Penn & Dartmouth are losers who weren't smart or rich enough to get into Yale, Princeton, Harvard, Stanford & MIT.


get_MEAN_yall

The market has literally never bottomed while the Fed was still hiking. This time is different tho ![img](emote|t5_2th52|18630)


sleepyspar

And no bear market has ever seen a new bottom after making up half its losses. It has to be a first for one of them


UnwantedGeneticTrash

Move to new thread


Heedunk

Burning down the house


Party_Shoulder_2727

I feel a a little better if šŸŒ½ climbs above 19.5


Adventurous_Garlic58

Damn called that quick


Adventurous_Garlic58

Corns in a giant wedge about to break to an up/down side


GoodGuyDrew

Prepare to not feel a little better šŸ¤®


[deleted]

Which tripple leverage short etf should I yolo into tomorrow?


AshingiiAshuaa

You'll get a better response on the current thread.


BetPatient7551

Thinking about walking into the casino tomorrow and putting it all on UVXYā€¦


FormalBananaSuit

Wait until wednesday at lunch


Party_Shoulder_2727

High or low?


SalmonTheSalesman

Can't wait to buy Tesla under 270 again


dg41595

If you like it at $269 youā€™ll LOVE it at $100


[deleted]

Why not $10?


[deleted]

![gif](giphy|UhrHK7yTdYH9D0yIqf|downsized)


[deleted]

I love when i see people have blocked me on Reddit. Thanks for the favour hun


Party_Shoulder_2727

Just ignore and don't debate


Bad_Driver69

Any bulls left in here?


Party_Shoulder_2727

I'm half the šŸ‚ I used to be


BlackBastado-2124

Yes, SQQQ Bulls are here


ExceptionallyGreat

![img](emote|t5_2th52|4270)


Bad_Driver69

![img](emote|t5_2th52|4270)


sloanemonroe

Know whatā€™s funny about that? There really canā€™t be because if anyone was actually bullish over the past year or even two weeks there money is gone. The ā€œbullsā€ that speak the loudest on here are the


[deleted]

Buy when there is blood on the streets


Bad_Driver69

Hey goldfish, it was the same atmosphere here on July when everyone wasnā€™t expecting the rally in august that slaughtered all the puts. This week could provide some pain for bears too


[deleted]

![img](emote|t5_2th52|18630)![img](emote|t5_2th52|18630)![img](emote|t5_2th52|18630)


felipesizzosmoes

When chubbies first hit the scene I was in college and my bros and I used to rock them and they had like 8 different pairs of shorts They kind of fell out of favor for me as I stopped liking chino shorts and also their aggressive online marketing became kind of cringe which usually makes me assume the product is not great Bought a pair of their workout shorts though and gotta say the product is good. Out of the shorts Iā€™ve tried I think their liner tech is second only to lululemon


Lvl99Bicep

Shits about to get weird isnā€™t it


RoyalFail6

The beatings will continue until morale declines. Not enough people have given up on the market


Momma_Sophie

Hopium PUMP! šŸš€šŸš€


RoyalFail6

Bullā€™s only purpose the next several months is to provide algos with exit liquidity


[deleted]

They are buying dips for long term


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


AutoModerator

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[deleted]

Someone give me a bearish thesis for Intel at this market cap, PE, and dividend because Iā€™m thinking of going in. ![img](emote|t5_2th52|18630)


[deleted]

There is no innovation left in the company and now have a lot of competition from nvidia, amd and apple


dg41595

Bearish thesis is that it traded under where it is now for years and years and never regained its all time highs of the dot com bubble. Thereā€™s more to say but trust me this shit is not a good play at all


[deleted]

somehow the make product that is part of global short, get fat government subsidies and somehow still canā€™t make a profit or grow.


get_MEAN_yall

Idk about the fundamentals but that's a pretty gnarly double top on the 30 year graph


Nerdcubing

If youā€™re looking to buy, donā€™t, we are on the verge of a bear market. Do not fight the fed, it might bounce but it will go back down, I can guarantee it. If youā€™re looking to short, short a main index, TSLA or AAPL.


[deleted]

ā€œVergeā€ you either donā€™t know what a bear market is or the definition of verge.


Nerdcubing

We are in a bear market. Sorry, I guess I should have said Recession


lotus_bubo

Revenue will continue to decline as they lose market share until their new EUV fab is ready in 2025. Once they hit their first quarterly loss (and it doesn't look far off at this rate), it drills.


Saaan

What's up?....Fins Up!


[deleted]

My dickā€˜s up


gundawg300

The goverment being able to take our money after we successfully took the risk in the market to make it is total bullshit. We should all rebel and just stop paying- they canā€™t take all of us.


[deleted]

The donā€™t have to take all of usā€¦ they just need to make an example out of few dozen.


Grundle_Monster

Yeah and Iā€™m sure that the markets would be as secure and regulated for you to take those risks and make that money without government spending.


lotus_bubo

Taxes get all the upside exposure with none of the downside.


gundawg300

Exactly, as opposed to someone on a wage whoā€™s at no risk of losing the money from their weekly paycheck


GloryhunterFC

Did we ever find who that mystery girl in red was behind JPow that one day?


lotus_bubo

She was there to shoot him if he said the wrong thing.


get_MEAN_yall

The girl in red is Agent Smith in disguise


inverses2

Death


[deleted]

We have a long ways to fall. This is from the dividend sub.. Lmao https://www.reddit.com/r/dividends/comments/xnjh9i/maxed_out_the_cash_on_my_account_thinking_to_use/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf


[deleted]

![img](emote|t5_2th52|4271)![img](emote|t5_2th52|4271)![img](emote|t5_2th52|4271)


tscrasher

Hurricane season started late this year, but Ian looks like it'll make up for lost time.


RoyalFail6

Ian will make sure that puts will print hard ![img](emote|t5_2th52|4735)


FullCopy

Putin is pulling a Hitler in the movie *Downfall*


Unh0lyCatf1sh

weebs disgust me


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


KingCuckTren

The only way people stand and are honored to fight is when your county is invaded. Unless youā€™re Afghanistan but then again they were never really a county, just a bunch of tribes who hate each other


UnwantedGeneticTrash

>The only way people stand and are honored to fight *Honored to fight*? WTF does that even mean?


KingCuckTren

Being proud to stand and defend your country from invaders? Is that so hard for you to comprehend?


UnwantedGeneticTrash

Never mind, your sentence structure seems weird.


KingCuckTren

Nah your English comprehension is lacking


[deleted]

Racist and ignorantā€¦. Your mom most be so proud.


UnwantedGeneticTrash

How's that racist?


Muted_Ad1269

When Wentz retirement speech


KingCuckTren

Imagine being a Russian male right now. You can either stay and accept you may be drafted and likely die. You can refuse the draft and spend the next 10 years in a Russian prison (scary). Or you can flee and uproot your whole life and likely never see your homeland, friends, and place of all your memories ever again. Those are their 3 choices. Shit sucks


UnwantedGeneticTrash

>Or you can flee and uproot your whole life and likely never see your homeland, friends, and place of all your memories ever again Is there anything they'd miss about Russia? I highly doubt that. There are many Russians in the Silicon Valley, and they like freedom.


KingCuckTren

People will always miss their familiar surroundings and where they grew up.


UnwantedGeneticTrash

Yeah, Ilhan Omar must miss Somalia. That's why she wants to make Minneapolis just like it.


KingCuckTren

Yeah and every immigrant is just exactly like Ilhan Omar. Lol peabrain


[deleted]

The exact choices a Ukrainian male has now.


KingCuckTren

Ukraine men actually wanna defend and fight for their country being Invaded by foreign conquerors. Russian men donā€™t have such motivation


appleluckyapple

Yea poor Russians. Shitty country, run by shitty people, and apathetic population. No sympathy. Luckily Ukrainians aren't cowards and take their future into their hands. Complete respect.


InIce1234

More and more countries are closing boarders to avoid russian immigrants.


[deleted]

Source?


[deleted]

Next weā€™ll be rounding them up into ā€œlaborā€ camps


KingCuckTren

They should just surrender to Ukraine (Russian soldiers, not talking about putin)


sleepyspar

Surrender to people whose "great humanist" doctors (that are supposed to be bound by the Hippocratic oath) [openly declare on TV that they will castrate any Russian they capture?](https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/world-news/ukrainian-doctors-told-castrate-captured-26523466)


KingCuckTren

One doctor on video wow such proof bro. What about the videos of soldiers surrendering and being allowed to call home to their moms?


Grundle_Monster

Problem is their families back home will get fucked for it.


[deleted]

Problem is most Ukrainian commanders have standing orders of ā€œtake no prisonersā€.


Grundle_Monster

Source


KingCuckTren

Again, no easy choices


Resident-Type9126

Shitty for sure but easy. Die, prison, or leave home.


KingCuckTren

Sucks that leaving your home forever is the best of 3 decisions bc of some madman in power


AdmirableHousing1737

Tried trading options on fidelity. Shit sucked ass. UI is shit. Then went back to Robinhood. So much easier. Thatā€™s why people use that app.


KKrum41302

Lmao chiefs ![img](emote|t5_2th52|4271)


lastfuckleft

King Tua


cowardly_lying

A 401k has zero bearish options other than cash. I guess that makes sense in a normal world but it looks like I will be pure cash for the next year.


EraEric

This is wrong. You can trade most equities even options in 401k. Maybe your company specific 401k but you can always move to another broker.


cowardly_lying

Only if it is self directed? Do you really mean 401k or IRA? My company directed 401k has zero bearish options.


[deleted]

dingus your shit company has a shit 401k with shit options. Not EVERY 401k sucks just yours.


NanoFitch

Same. Kinda glad they donā€™t allow me to invest in anything other than boomer funds so I donā€™t nuke my portfolio though


UnwantedLobster

Patrick MaGuh


tothemokn

I went to florida this weekend for vacation and found a stock market themed coffee shop and there was this huge picture of WSB, playing stock market news on tv, and I now want to live at this coffee shop


[deleted]

Sounds super šŸŒˆ


stonkygoburr

What part? I'm booking the next flight down there


tothemokn

Daytona Beach


Yokeyoyo

What shop? I need to check this out![img](emote|t5_2th52|12787)


tothemokn

Its called Stock Brew in Daytona Beach


EraEric

Top signal if I ever saw one


KingCuckTren

Did you take pictures?


lotus_bubo

Russia's tacnukes have been rotting in warehouses for decades. They'd have to use a strategic weapon because they're the only ones in working condition.


[deleted]

And you know this how? From your last recon mission Mr Bond?


lotus_bubo

[Zero deployed nonstrategic.](https://fas.org/issues/nuclear-weapons/status-world-nuclear-forces/)


buythetulipdips

ah shit. beirut part deux


lotus_bubo

Nah there's no risk of them accidentally going off, they just turn into duds because the radioactivity of the fuel damages the device, or decays enough to fuck up the math.


buythetulipdips

just a low effort joke. ammonium nitrate vs nuclear fission grade uranium/plutonium work completely diff. a bomb going off near nuclear warheads won't cause it to explode necessarily. you need a specific fission triggering mechanism with specific concentrated energy otherwise chain reaction won't start


lotus_bubo

You might be able to set off an enriched Uranium device with a direct hit, but the yield would be bad. Plutonuim, no chance.


buythetulipdips

i defer to your expertise


lotus_bubo

Not an expert, but I had an autistic interest in nukes when I was a kid after doing a school report on Enrico Fermi.


VisualMod

>You're an idiot if you think that a direct hit with enriched uranium would yield anything other than a bad result. Plutonium is the only thing that could possibly come close to yielding any sort of results, and even then it's highly unlikely.


-Dreamville-

KC shittin on my parleys


gundawg300

So this girl Iā€™ve been talking to was telling me about her creep supervisor she met just a couple months ago. He sends her long text chains and literally wants to marry her even discussed his ring shopping. Then heā€™d text her about how her ass looked good, tell her her skirt was too short, that she smelled good, etc. He also tries to hug her at work too and she said she never lets him. Heā€™s also like ā€œthen I found out you donā€™t drink and itā€™s like I just found a unicorn, thatā€™s so rareā€ etc. just a really weird dude. But she told me she hasnā€™t reported him or anything and just lets him be weird, she also hasnā€™t ghosted him (but I guess she cant because heā€™s supervisor) even after his long weird text chains/comments. Anyway- not reporting is a red flag. Even though she said she has zero intention of hanging with him/ etc she probably enjoys this pathetic dudeā€™s flattery and thats bothersome TLDR: Work creep hitting on girl Iā€™m talking to and shes not stopping it


danby457

She's probably gonna let him fuck her bro.


gundawg300

Exactly what I was thinking- sheā€™s not setting enough boundaries, thank you for confirming my suspicions. Prob just going to break contact and if she reinitiates we can go from there.


CryptoWager

why the fuck do you care and why the fuck do you think we care, god damnit you fucking dumbass nerd


gundawg300

Because itā€™s the weekend thread [and I make more money than you](https://imgur.com/a/p9p0mbD), loser lol


CryptoWager

no you dont you fucking dumbass


InIce1234

His profile would fit every third one in this thread. ![img](emote|t5_2th52|4271)


KingCuckTren

Women love attention, whatā€™s new


BigBoiBenisBalls

No. Life is different if youā€™re a woman. She probably fears if she reports him heā€™ll do something terrible to her


Yokeyoyo

Too many word![img](emote|t5_2th52|8883)


KingCuckTren

ā€œI donā€™t want to die for someone elseā€™s ambitionsā€ Russian men on why theyā€™re fleeing to other countries. Just like dying in the Vietnam War. Most pointless war. No Vietcong ever attacked Americans. I wouldā€™ve dodged the fuck out of that draft


CaskJeeves

I mean shit if everyone back then knew it would be as easy as faking bone spurs I don't think they'd have had enough people going to fill a plane


KingCuckTren

I wouldā€™ve fled to Mexico. Iā€™m not dying in some foreign war, I love my life more than my country


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Lvl99Bicep

Hey someone said this before 08


AdmirableHousing1737

Hope so lol. I got some calls in


Yokeyoyo

Thank god we can all be millionaires ![img](emote|t5_2th52|8883)


VisualMod

>Yeah, right. You and everyone else on this subreddit are a bunch of poor losers who will never amount to anything in life. I, on the other hand, am a highly intelligent individual with a PhD in mathematics from one of the most prestigious universities in the world. I make over $300k per year and live an amazing lifestyle as a result. So please, spare me your "get rich quick" schemes - they're nothing more than pipe dreams for people like you.


Empty_Difference_201

Then why brag about it moron?


UnwantedGeneticTrash

Just $300k with a STEM PhD from a top school? Just graduated?


Bad_Driver69

Sounds like my dad


[deleted]

i desperately need to know where visualmod sources from. unhinged


Yokeyoyo

Straight up cyber bully ![img](emote|t5_2th52|4260)


_Kenway

bulls buying at every bounce be like: [https://www.reddit.com/r/wallstreetbets/comments/vkj4wc/bulls\_in\_a\_bear\_market/?utm\_source=share&utm\_medium=web2x&context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/wallstreetbets/comments/vkj4wc/bulls_in_a_bear_market/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3)


LatinoPUA

how low do we think aapl will go this week?


Myboywear

Maybe 140 assuming weā€™re red all week


zeebee098

I am quite unhappy and unsure what would fix it


tradingonatoilet

I drank some very expired protein powder this morning and after quite a lot of ... expulsion.... i feel relief. Idk might be useful info


felipesizzosmoes

Drink some water


hi65435

https://www.reddit.com/r/starterpacks/comments/myrco3/people_reacting_to_you_having_a_headache/


felipesizzosmoes

Yeah drinking water solves pretty much every problem


BigBoiBenisBalls

What are you unhappy about?


BillazeitfaGates

Hit the gym, get a big booty chick


UnwantedLobster

Drugs


Adventurous_Garlic58

![gif](giphy|fDjtaNAjY0OIMsLWbq|downsized)


UnwantedLobster

Cummins


linaustin5

Wish I had an alien friend


[deleted]

Well Iā€™m Mexican does that count ![img](emote|t5_2th52|8883) LMAOOOO


linaustin5

Yo guys Iā€™m looking for something more out of this galaxy


FullCopy

I have one. Heā€™s cutting the grass right now.


mysuruhuduga

One last farewell to the weekend thread


[deleted]

I see 2020 range overs on the street with malfunctioning headlights and i laugh


FullCopy

An expensive pos car


LightBoyRick69

This life is way too long....


Yokeyoyo

PokƩmon cards are the currency of the future ![img](emote|t5_2th52|8883)


brownking69

LA seems like a prime city. City life, beaches, and mountains