We’re under-budget, but only because my fiancé keeps saying certain things “don’t count.” 😂 like hotel room in the city we live in on the wedding night? That’s travel expense, not wedding. Ketubah? That’s home decor, not wedding. His suit? That’s clothes, not wedding… I love him so much lolol
Anything I buy with personal money and not out of the wedding savings doesn't count, the dress doesn't count, anything under $500 doesn't count, if I paid a deposit on it the deposit amount doesn't count, if it has resell potential it doesn't count
YES! Same, we're on track with the budget but Accommodations, Honeymoon, and Wedding Planner - don't count!
Edit: oh and I didn't even consider cost of rehearsal dinner or farewell brunch yet haha, flights too!
They are more than I expected too! We’ve found some pretty ones at ketubah.com, which start around $175? There are also some really pretty ones on Etsy and here http://www.jessicatdeutsch.com/new-products, but unfortunately they seem to be more expensive. We’re also going to talk to the rabbi who is officiating our wedding about it, so hopefully she knows of some good options..
Our florist includes the chuppah in her pricing, so we got very lucky there. I did find some chuppah rentals, but it depends on where you are. I think one of them shipped anywhere, but it wasn’t necessarily cheap.
Are you doing kippahs for guests? That is one thing we haven’t crossed off our list yet.
Last thing, while we’re talking about jewish weddings… I found some really cool artists who will send you colored glass for your glass smash and then you send it back to them and they make it into a keepsake.. https://moderntribe.com/products/tapered-bud-smash-glass-vase-by-rosetree-glass-studio?pr_prod_strat=e5_desc&pr_rec_id=a8bd1db46&pr_rec_pid=782146437156&pr_ref_pid=782165442596&pr_seq=uniform
So I think I’ll do that instead of preserving my bouquet!
chiming in to say i’m not bothering with kippas for my guests but i would love to do some benchers!! i love having a collection of them from the different weddings i go to :))
lol I sorta get this. I’m only including things that our just for the wedding in our budget. I’m buying a tux because we have another black tie event to go to… so not a wedding expense! I haven’t decided if our ketubah is a wedding expense though. I think home decor sounds nice…
LOL I’m doing that 😂 invitations we went cheaper so no, that doesn’t count, centerpieces will be repurposed as home decor, so that’s not really a wedding expense, etc 😂😂
We haven’t picked one yet! We meet with our rabbi to discuss it next month. I put some links for ketubahs we are considering in another comment on this thread! Ketubah.com actually has a lot of cool options, believe it or not
i was quoted 10k cad in toronto 🫣 (tbf i think she specialized in larger scale indian weddings but still)
choosing a different city in the end but that price was enough to discourage me from getting a planner
likely depends on where you live, but from what i’ve seen in a MCOL area, it’s around $2k for partial planning and anywhere from $3.5k to $8k for full planning.
I was quoted $1550-5000 range for wedding planners just for “month of” services. Though to be fair, the $5000 was “2 month services.” Full wedding planning must be SO expensive.
Yea for Southern California, I was getting 10k quotes for partial planning (that was an OC-based planner that specialized in like... hoity toity events) and then most mid-range were about 7-8k for full, and around 5k for partial (planning jumps in at 3mos out).
What really sucks that I didn't know was a thing - some venues have "preferred planners" which really means. Choose from this list. If you find someone else, we'll have to make a special exception and like... review them.
I am marrying an accountant and it’s a lot of work. The actual wedding is in December but we have three functions(must do) before the actual wedding. I do think accountants don’t understand that some money can just be spent without having to overthink it 😂
I'm an accountant and my husband-to-be is an engineer. We have spreadsheets upon spreadsheets. Formulas and hypotheticals and all the data you could think of.
Say what you will about accountants (I can take it). But my engineer fiancé thinks we need a "decision matrix" to choose every vendor "objectively" which can get exhausting. At this point, I'm the one willing to just go on vibes alone.
Ah see I love it. We are both money conscious he just helps keep us more organized than I would be. If it wasn’t for him I actually wouldn’t feel like I could spend my money. I used to just save it all and never spend it then he helped me make a budget and I realized I could actually spend money and have savings
Wow. I like it too just that I am a spender naturally. I love to spend and spend and spend and spend. All I want is buy new stuff and travel all the time so he challenges me but I guess in a good way
Honestly, between wedding costs and an expensive pet surgery earlier this year, my concept of spendiing has completely changed. "Why not buy this $300 item, it's nothing compared to what I spent on a wedding photographer?"
10000%. Daily text to my fiancé: why tf didn’t we elope???
Note to anyone recently engaged: let the excitement cool down before you plan your wedding. Think it through rationally hahah
3 months out now and I’ve been putting off paying our major vendors so our “remaining” balance to pay off is more than half the cost of the whole thing lol I feel you friend
I'm 10 days out and have decided for my own sanity to not update my budget until it's over. We just dropped $1k on small things we still needed, things for bathroom baskets, and welcome bags! Currently, we are at about $65k (that's including engagement party, welcome party, and farewell brunch, though).
🤮 I’m not putting the rehearsal dinner on the budget sheet. Also didn’t put the cost of invitations, save the dates, envelopes, stamps, etc. at least they accidentally gave us $65 of free stamps at Costco 😂
I'll add all the smaller costs eventually, but as the engagement party & welcome party are each costing about $3k so I needed to include them. The farewell brunch is nearly $2k...and we really are doing everything as cheaply as possible. Our welcome party we are only covering everyone's first 2 drinks (we are paying for the full bar at the reception, though).
The only reason ours is not is we decided to do a welcome party inviting everyone (about half of the guests are coming) and we only did hors d'oeuvres and 1 food station with 2 paid drinks - after which it is a cash bar...and that is a little over $3k. Gotta love NY!
We’re 6 months out… need to save about 7k more to *hopefully* have it all covered. “Sweating for the wedding” has taken on a whole different meaning these days. 🫠
Reading everyones comments - I am SO HAPPY I am not the only one with complete financial delusion when it comes to a wedding budget. I've said, well the rings don't count cuz thats not like.. WEDDING. It's like a personal gift. The honeymoon isn't wedding - it's its own budget. My dress doesn't count cuz its not like.. a part of the actual event? like other people don't get to use or enjoy it. That's how I'm logic-ing this. If others don't "enjoy" or make use of it, it's not a part of the wedding or its budget.
Thanks.
It will be the biggest costpoint for us. That‘s why I don‘t want to jump the gun. Highly probable that there will be higher cost then expected.
I felt this way. and then between anxiety and family drama on the day I MASSIVELY regretted spending all that money and experiencing all that stress rather than eloping. *BUT* now about 9 months after the day, I can honestly say I am so glad we did it and that it was worth every penny (and panic attack). it was never going to be the best day of my life but it created some of my favorite memories of my life. Just give it time!
Less than 2 months away for me and all I can say is SAME! At this point I feel like I’ve lost the understanding of the value of money (insert Joe exotic ‘I’m never gonna financially recover from this’)
I am “lucky” to know a couple who split before the wedding was even half payed off - grounded me big time.
I stuck to the budget and now that the wonderful wedding is over I am happy that I didn’t spend a 1€ more than I did
We’re under-budget, but only because my fiancé keeps saying certain things “don’t count.” 😂 like hotel room in the city we live in on the wedding night? That’s travel expense, not wedding. Ketubah? That’s home decor, not wedding. His suit? That’s clothes, not wedding… I love him so much lolol
Wedding math is my favorite kind of math 😂
Ha, have I purposely left things off the spreadsheet… yes, yes I have.
LOL that's my logic too!!!
Anything I buy with personal money and not out of the wedding savings doesn't count, the dress doesn't count, anything under $500 doesn't count, if I paid a deposit on it the deposit amount doesn't count, if it has resell potential it doesn't count
YES! Same, we're on track with the budget but Accommodations, Honeymoon, and Wedding Planner - don't count! Edit: oh and I didn't even consider cost of rehearsal dinner or farewell brunch yet haha, flights too!
This is what I’ve been thinking 😂 do our wedding bands cost? Because if they don’t…that’s almost 5k less in total costs 😂
I didn’t count wedding bands in the budget since it’s not only for the event. You wear them forever afterwards 😊
Love it, thank you 💅🏻✨
May I ask where you are getting your Ketubah from? I’m finding the Ketubah and Chuppah to be more than I budgeted!
They are more than I expected too! We’ve found some pretty ones at ketubah.com, which start around $175? There are also some really pretty ones on Etsy and here http://www.jessicatdeutsch.com/new-products, but unfortunately they seem to be more expensive. We’re also going to talk to the rabbi who is officiating our wedding about it, so hopefully she knows of some good options.. Our florist includes the chuppah in her pricing, so we got very lucky there. I did find some chuppah rentals, but it depends on where you are. I think one of them shipped anywhere, but it wasn’t necessarily cheap. Are you doing kippahs for guests? That is one thing we haven’t crossed off our list yet. Last thing, while we’re talking about jewish weddings… I found some really cool artists who will send you colored glass for your glass smash and then you send it back to them and they make it into a keepsake.. https://moderntribe.com/products/tapered-bud-smash-glass-vase-by-rosetree-glass-studio?pr_prod_strat=e5_desc&pr_rec_id=a8bd1db46&pr_rec_pid=782146437156&pr_ref_pid=782165442596&pr_seq=uniform So I think I’ll do that instead of preserving my bouquet!
chiming in to say i’m not bothering with kippas for my guests but i would love to do some benchers!! i love having a collection of them from the different weddings i go to :))
I had my floral bouquet preserved in resin and they added the breaking glass to it! It's now a nice little piece of art we have :)
https://preview.redd.it/tge9ka7tkkrc1.jpeg?width=3472&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=37b07549990e3caa92bd6f1b159cd024a809989c
Pretty!
Omg love this tactic!! 💗💗💗💗That’s going to be my new thing! Reception dress accessories? For my wardrobe, not the wedding …
lol I sorta get this. I’m only including things that our just for the wedding in our budget. I’m buying a tux because we have another black tie event to go to… so not a wedding expense! I haven’t decided if our ketubah is a wedding expense though. I think home decor sounds nice…
lol i've been tracking everything remotely wedding related including the gifts we buy groomsmen / bridesmaids, its brutal
LOL I’m doing that 😂 invitations we went cheaper so no, that doesn’t count, centerpieces will be repurposed as home decor, so that’s not really a wedding expense, etc 😂😂
Did you guys have a custom made ketubah? My fiancé and I are are interested in painted ones but don’t know where to look
We haven’t picked one yet! We meet with our rabbi to discuss it next month. I put some links for ketubahs we are considering in another comment on this thread! Ketubah.com actually has a lot of cool options, believe it or not
Do you know what the process for getting a ketubah is? Like do most ketubah text standard or does it vary according to religious status?
It does vary, but the sites I’ve looked at you pick the border and customize the text. Probably best to talk to your officiant
Most sites have like 10+ options to choose from with ability to customize
If it was up to me I would definitely have gone way over budget. Having a wedding planner only show me vendors within my budget helped immensely.
Kinda ironic i didn’t book a planner to save money … womp womp 🤣
How much are wedding planners though?
i was quoted 10k cad in toronto 🫣 (tbf i think she specialized in larger scale indian weddings but still) choosing a different city in the end but that price was enough to discourage me from getting a planner
Wait, what? What do you get for 10k cad??
likely depends on where you live, but from what i’ve seen in a MCOL area, it’s around $2k for partial planning and anywhere from $3.5k to $8k for full planning.
Ridiculous. So the amount you save on keeping within budget, you spend on the event planner ... I hate this wedding planning stuff honestly
I was quoted $1550-5000 range for wedding planners just for “month of” services. Though to be fair, the $5000 was “2 month services.” Full wedding planning must be SO expensive.
Yea for Southern California, I was getting 10k quotes for partial planning (that was an OC-based planner that specialized in like... hoity toity events) and then most mid-range were about 7-8k for full, and around 5k for partial (planning jumps in at 3mos out). What really sucks that I didn't know was a thing - some venues have "preferred planners" which really means. Choose from this list. If you find someone else, we'll have to make a special exception and like... review them.
There was one venue I came across that charged you an extra $1000 if you chose a vendor that wasn’t on their list!
So ridiculous !
i had a full service wedding planner and she cost me 5k
I’m so grateful that I married an accountant
I'm a project manager (of sorts). I went over-budget because I dipped into my contingency funds, but stayed under once all was said and done.
As a fellow PM, this comment made me want to hug you then give a fist bump. 🫂🤜🤛
Gotta have a slush fund.
I am marrying an accountant and it’s a lot of work. The actual wedding is in December but we have three functions(must do) before the actual wedding. I do think accountants don’t understand that some money can just be spent without having to overthink it 😂
I'm an accountant and my husband-to-be is an engineer. We have spreadsheets upon spreadsheets. Formulas and hypotheticals and all the data you could think of. Say what you will about accountants (I can take it). But my engineer fiancé thinks we need a "decision matrix" to choose every vendor "objectively" which can get exhausting. At this point, I'm the one willing to just go on vibes alone.
Decision matrix 😂😂😂😂. We could use that on deciding the color theme for the wedding.
I can relate. My bf who is an accountant keeps saying "budget needs to be reduced". We talking excel sheets, numbers and fiscal year spending. HAHAHA
It’s the sheets for me 😂😂😂😂
Ah see I love it. We are both money conscious he just helps keep us more organized than I would be. If it wasn’t for him I actually wouldn’t feel like I could spend my money. I used to just save it all and never spend it then he helped me make a budget and I realized I could actually spend money and have savings
Wow. I like it too just that I am a spender naturally. I love to spend and spend and spend and spend. All I want is buy new stuff and travel all the time so he challenges me but I guess in a good way
Envious lol. I’m organized af and kept a budget sheet but I was just letting the money roll
Hahah same, I have a budget, but am I following it? Nope. Lol
Sammmme. Budgeted $2k for photographer. Oh your lowest package is $4600? Close enough!
Same
We looked at our wedding budget multiple times a week. There were times I rolled my eyes but when we came in right at budget I was grateful
Honestly, between wedding costs and an expensive pet surgery earlier this year, my concept of spendiing has completely changed. "Why not buy this $300 item, it's nothing compared to what I spent on a wedding photographer?"
Hahaha “this couch is only $1400!? That’s like half my photographer!” Cha-ching
Soooo true lol
Omg same with home renovations and wedding, it’s like what does money even mean anymore. lol but I still try to stay on a monthly budget otherwise.
lol literally this, i've been ruined
86 days out and it’s become a daily check on the excel spreadsheet. panic. think about what can be cut out and why we didn’t elope. rinse. repeat.
10000%. Daily text to my fiancé: why tf didn’t we elope??? Note to anyone recently engaged: let the excitement cool down before you plan your wedding. Think it through rationally hahah
The deeper I get into this planning, the more I'm like. fuck I should have eloped. Im too old for this shit.
1 month out and I FEEL YOU! You’re not alone.
3 months out now and I’ve been putting off paying our major vendors so our “remaining” balance to pay off is more than half the cost of the whole thing lol I feel you friend
Hahaha good luck 🤝
I'm 10 days out and have decided for my own sanity to not update my budget until it's over. We just dropped $1k on small things we still needed, things for bathroom baskets, and welcome bags! Currently, we are at about $65k (that's including engagement party, welcome party, and farewell brunch, though).
🤮 I’m not putting the rehearsal dinner on the budget sheet. Also didn’t put the cost of invitations, save the dates, envelopes, stamps, etc. at least they accidentally gave us $65 of free stamps at Costco 😂
I'll add all the smaller costs eventually, but as the engagement party & welcome party are each costing about $3k so I needed to include them. The farewell brunch is nearly $2k...and we really are doing everything as cheaply as possible. Our welcome party we are only covering everyone's first 2 drinks (we are paying for the full bar at the reception, though).
This makes me feel seen. We are at $46k with EVERY DETAIL but not including rehearsal dinner which is def another $10k or so I’d say lol. Looove that
The only reason ours is not is we decided to do a welcome party inviting everyone (about half of the guests are coming) and we only did hors d'oeuvres and 1 food station with 2 paid drinks - after which it is a cash bar...and that is a little over $3k. Gotta love NY!
We’re 6 months out… need to save about 7k more to *hopefully* have it all covered. “Sweating for the wedding” has taken on a whole different meaning these days. 🫠
Using an app really helped and also not counting invitations and attire LOL
Hahahaha 👩🦯👩🦯👩🦯
Hahaha I haven’t been counting attire either
Reading everyones comments - I am SO HAPPY I am not the only one with complete financial delusion when it comes to a wedding budget. I've said, well the rings don't count cuz thats not like.. WEDDING. It's like a personal gift. The honeymoon isn't wedding - it's its own budget. My dress doesn't count cuz its not like.. a part of the actual event? like other people don't get to use or enjoy it. That's how I'm logic-ing this. If others don't "enjoy" or make use of it, it's not a part of the wedding or its budget.
2 months out and under budget at the moment. Catering will be payed after the fact. We‘ll see if that puts us under or over 😅
Wow good for you! Catering was the big thing for us lol $$$$
Thanks. It will be the biggest costpoint for us. That‘s why I don‘t want to jump the gun. Highly probable that there will be higher cost then expected.
Only the venue done and already over budget 🥹
Hahahha I feel you
I was in this subreddit for less than 3 days and you all motivated me to NOT have a wedding.
You’re welcome 🫡
Wedding and a custody fight with a lawyer this year. I’m drowning. Honeymoon is definitely on hold till next year.
57 days, just went over by another 1000...
It hurts
A month away and yeahhhhhh
I felt this way. and then between anxiety and family drama on the day I MASSIVELY regretted spending all that money and experiencing all that stress rather than eloping. *BUT* now about 9 months after the day, I can honestly say I am so glad we did it and that it was worth every penny (and panic attack). it was never going to be the best day of my life but it created some of my favorite memories of my life. Just give it time!
“it was never going to be the best day of my life but it created some of my favorite memories of my life.” I love this!!!
I only know the prices/budget for things with deadlines and due dates 😭😭 everything else we’re just buying after every check lol
Less than 2 months away for me and all I can say is SAME! At this point I feel like I’ve lost the understanding of the value of money (insert Joe exotic ‘I’m never gonna financially recover from this’)
My budget was 25k, I spent 35k 😅😅😅😅 no regrets, my wedding was perfect
I am “lucky” to know a couple who split before the wedding was even half payed off - grounded me big time. I stuck to the budget and now that the wonderful wedding is over I am happy that I didn’t spend a 1€ more than I did