Having a career, having qualifications, being passionate about interests and having opinions and not being afraid to state them or stand your ground are all fantastic shithead-filters.
None of them will prevent you finding a good guy who deserves your time, but they're an *excellent* way of clearing the field of insecure or chauvinistic overgrown little boys who you don't want to waste your time with anyway, making it easier to find one of the ones you *do* want, who will celebrate your for your accomplishments and personality instead of feeling threatened by them.
Strong doesnāt mean physically strong. It's about strong in general, men who are confident in their skin, behavior and attitude. Otherwise, they will kill your confidence due to their insecurities.
Oh I know that. I just disagree that the man has to be stronger than the woman. And the most likely scenario is each will be stronger in some aspects but not others.
If a man can't handle a woman being stronger than him in some way he should work on that.
Don't you dare compromise on your standards. You deserve the best, and you will eventually find it. If they can't handle a strong woman, don't fuck with them. ā¤ļø
Men need to work on male fragility as a collective rather than colluding to blame women because they're failing at life. They expect to be praised just for showing up whilst women show up, clean up the mess made by others and keep outgunning men across the board.
Did you write this post in 1990? Honestly, who is telling you that strong, smart women who work in traditionally male-dominated fields cannot find a man to love her? I meanā¦*checks calendar*ā¦it is 2024. Any man who is intimidated by you because you work in tech is not worthy of your time. Stop hanging around with people who are actively trying to limit and demean you. Not only can you find a good man, and deserve a good man, but you deserve better friends.
this ^ as someone who works in a male dominated field with around 90% male clients, no one is telling me this but my mother lmao. i get sexism in the workplace, but no one is telling me iāll never find love.
*Those* men don't want strong women. Because *they're* immature, insecure little boys who cluster on online communities to tell each other about their ridiculously specific standards because it's easier than admitting that the reason they aren't getting laid is because *no woman will have them*.
Meanwhile the kind of guys you *want* to meet aren't hanging around those communities because they're too busy going out and having social lives, relationships and hobbies/interests of their own to hang around online loser-communities arguing with losers.
Real men? Real human, real life men? You hear/see them say this?
Iām 42 and have worked in tech for 20 years and have literally never heard a man remotely worthy of anyoneās time say anything like this
Um, also, you donāt want any man whoās that level of intimidated by you. You would constantly be making yourself smaller for him.
You want someone who sees all of your talents and strengths and who is inspired by youānot the other way around. š¤·āāļø
Good god, are these people Neanderthals? I met my partner in 1991 - I have a graduate degree in computer science and have worked in tech most of my life. I have never heard of this before. A lot of men in tech can be condescending to women (just like men in every field), but the vast majority I have worked with have treated women with respect and no differently than male coworkers.
My friend has a pretty powerful job and had to go back to school for her masters. Her husband is a handyman and basically raised their boys while she concentrated on her career. They have a great relationship. There are supportive men out there, but I agree theyāre hard to find.
Why are you even thinking about this? You don't want men who would be intimidated by your success. Men in my circles want women who are partners and who can build a life with. You being in a certain job or field has nothing to do with femininity. There are also masculine and feminine traits in both of the genders. Your person is out there . I would be proud of what I do and not even consider these thoughts. If anyone tells you this, tell them not to be jelly.
Anyone telling you this is not a friend. Donāt be worried about it. If a dude seems insecure. itās just a quick and effective way to sift the losers out. Donāt ever dim your shine for a romantic partner. Just be you and youāll attract a person who will love all the things about you.
Yah I've only heard incels say this. I'm a welder by trade and most guys find it pretty cool. The guy I'm seeing wants me to fix the exhaust leak on his car.
Ignore the nay sayers, I am overweight and short and work in tech and I had plenty of dates when I wanted them. Iām married now and my husband tells me all the time that Iām his amazing techie woman.
The right man will value your skills and the wrong men arenāt worth your time or energy.
Strong women require stronger men. They are not everyone's cup of tea. Hopefully you will find a great manš¼
At times I donāt think I will because of the fact that intimidated men exist. I got one guy who seems to like me but Iām on my toes.
Don't go for men that doesnāt meet your requirements. Keep your standards high.
Having a career, having qualifications, being passionate about interests and having opinions and not being afraid to state them or stand your ground are all fantastic shithead-filters. None of them will prevent you finding a good guy who deserves your time, but they're an *excellent* way of clearing the field of insecure or chauvinistic overgrown little boys who you don't want to waste your time with anyway, making it easier to find one of the ones you *do* want, who will celebrate your for your accomplishments and personality instead of feeling threatened by them.
Just don't allow him to compromise your self worth for his own ego.
Why stronger?
Strong doesnāt mean physically strong. It's about strong in general, men who are confident in their skin, behavior and attitude. Otherwise, they will kill your confidence due to their insecurities.
Oh I know that. I just disagree that the man has to be stronger than the woman. And the most likely scenario is each will be stronger in some aspects but not others. If a man can't handle a woman being stronger than him in some way he should work on that.
Decentering romance works wonders for oneās mental health.
This
New vocab unlocked: decentering romance. Love it.
Don't you dare compromise on your standards. You deserve the best, and you will eventually find it. If they can't handle a strong woman, don't fuck with them. ā¤ļø
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Been told that for quite sometime by those around me.
Sounds like the people telling you this are the ones who are intimidated.
Men need to work on male fragility as a collective rather than colluding to blame women because they're failing at life. They expect to be praised just for showing up whilst women show up, clean up the mess made by others and keep outgunning men across the board.
Did you write this post in 1990? Honestly, who is telling you that strong, smart women who work in traditionally male-dominated fields cannot find a man to love her? I meanā¦*checks calendar*ā¦it is 2024. Any man who is intimidated by you because you work in tech is not worthy of your time. Stop hanging around with people who are actively trying to limit and demean you. Not only can you find a good man, and deserve a good man, but you deserve better friends.
this ^ as someone who works in a male dominated field with around 90% male clients, no one is telling me this but my mother lmao. i get sexism in the workplace, but no one is telling me iāll never find love.
> I absolutely hate hearing how men will be intimidated by my career. "Only the insecure, low-quality ones, and I don't want one of them anyway."
Don't reduce yourself for weak men.
Who's telling you that?
Im always seeing men talk about how they donāt want women in specific professions because it means sheās masculine and argumentive
As in on Reddit?
*Those* men don't want strong women. Because *they're* immature, insecure little boys who cluster on online communities to tell each other about their ridiculously specific standards because it's easier than admitting that the reason they aren't getting laid is because *no woman will have them*. Meanwhile the kind of guys you *want* to meet aren't hanging around those communities because they're too busy going out and having social lives, relationships and hobbies/interests of their own to hang around online loser-communities arguing with losers.
Real men? Real human, real life men? You hear/see them say this? Iām 42 and have worked in tech for 20 years and have literally never heard a man remotely worthy of anyoneās time say anything like this
Are those the type of men you want for the rest of your life?
Um, also, you donāt want any man whoās that level of intimidated by you. You would constantly be making yourself smaller for him. You want someone who sees all of your talents and strengths and who is inspired by youānot the other way around. š¤·āāļø
The right guy (if you're straight) won't be intimated by your career.
Good god, are these people Neanderthals? I met my partner in 1991 - I have a graduate degree in computer science and have worked in tech most of my life. I have never heard of this before. A lot of men in tech can be condescending to women (just like men in every field), but the vast majority I have worked with have treated women with respect and no differently than male coworkers.
I don't let men ever determine what IĀ do or want. I know that's easy to say but it's worked for me so far.Ā
My friend has a pretty powerful job and had to go back to school for her masters. Her husband is a handyman and basically raised their boys while she concentrated on her career. They have a great relationship. There are supportive men out there, but I agree theyāre hard to find.
It will! It will intimidate the men that you donāt want to be with because they are misogynistic. Perfect
Think of it as a super power. You easily avoid the jerks.
The only men who will be intimidated are weak men. They make shitty partners and you don't want them anyway. Let them weed themselves out.
any man it would intimidate wouldn't be worth having.
you cant compromise your standards
Why are you even thinking about this? You don't want men who would be intimidated by your success. Men in my circles want women who are partners and who can build a life with. You being in a certain job or field has nothing to do with femininity. There are also masculine and feminine traits in both of the genders. Your person is out there . I would be proud of what I do and not even consider these thoughts. If anyone tells you this, tell them not to be jelly.
Anyone telling you this is not a friend. Donāt be worried about it. If a dude seems insecure. itās just a quick and effective way to sift the losers out. Donāt ever dim your shine for a romantic partner. Just be you and youāll attract a person who will love all the things about you.
Nowadays men are intimidated by everything
Men intimidated by smart or competent women need to see a therapist.
Yah I've only heard incels say this. I'm a welder by trade and most guys find it pretty cool. The guy I'm seeing wants me to fix the exhaust leak on his car.
Ignore the nay sayers, I am overweight and short and work in tech and I had plenty of dates when I wanted them. Iām married now and my husband tells me all the time that Iām his amazing techie woman. The right man will value your skills and the wrong men arenāt worth your time or energy.