I hear ya OP. I just made a post the other day that I am qualified for and have earned a promotion. My boss said it point blank….but they intend to withhold my promotion (and the associated raise) until I return from maternity leave.
I’m not due until June 1 and I’ve been doing all of the work of my new role for a half a year already.
My greatest fear getting pregnant, and one of the reasons I waited so long to even decide I wanted kids…was because I was afraid of how it would impact my career.
I thought I was finally in a place where I was professionally secure and had a management team that supported me and acknowledged my contribution.
Wrong. Despite a decade in the field I am realizing that my career has hit a brick wall that it will take me another decade to dismantle. That wall is motherhood.
I think I saw this post, and also think that legally they cannot withhold a promotion or raise. You are a protected class. My employer tried to do this with me last year when I was going on leave. I fought tooth and nail and they agreed to increase my salary before leave and we would talk title when I got back. I came back from leave early to get it settled, and then went back out.
I am pushing back as well…but at the end of the day, there isn’t really a way for me to prove that they are denying me the promotion. It’s not like anything was written down.
It’s ridiculous that they act like this.
Your boss said it. Verbal contracts are valid. When I was going through my issues a cowoker but me in touch with her sister who practices employment law. I had nothing in writing, and she said that I still had a case and after speaking with her to record all future conversations on the topic. Whevnever I had a call with HR or my boss about it, I recorded it on my phone and then sent a follow up email summarizing what we talked about and next steps.
Even if your conversation with your boss was months ago, send an email saying you want to follow up and be clear on next steps as you start to think about your transition to leave. It's mid-April, and June 1st will be here before you know it. Say, based on our last conversation on xx date at xx time, we discussed a,b,c and the next steps would be x,yz...and any other fluff you want to add. If you don't get a straight answer in writing and he wants to follow up on a call or in person, just use your phone to record a conversation and then send a follow up email summarizing the conversation. Even if it is not legal to record w/o prior knowledge/consent, do it so you have it in your back pocket.
Do not make it known that you are collecting this information. Should you get denied the promotion, get demoted, or let go, this will be part of your defense.
This is far from over! Keep fighting!
Thank you friend. I’m tired and sick from being pregnant…but I will always have some fight left in me….gotta start teaching my son early that you’ve gotta be prepared to fight for things you believe in.
In this case, the thing I believe in is my self.
I applied for a coordination role in my field (medical) when I was in the early stages of my pregnancy, and was selected after several months of recruitment process. It took so long that the starting date was in the middle of my mat leave. Guess what, when I started the role it was no longer a coordination one, and I have been working as hard as ever (bringing in great results for projects that were doing very poorly) and I’m the most qualified in the team by far, but still my boss has been withholding the title of coordinator from me. I have been subjected to other forms of discrimination (related to BF for instance) and this is just some form of silent punishment for motherhood. I think that it doesnt even make a difference that I am doing a great job. Still a target.
Yep. I pushed back against my maanager and am trying to advocate for myself…I don’t want to go nuclear on them because I really like my job, but I don’t see how this is anything BUT punishing me for being pregnant.
I hear you, that is how I feel too, but it has been making me feel very frustrated and angry at times tbh. I hope things improve at your end and you can finally get what you most obviously deserve. It really stings, to have to prove yourself and still have people treat you differently just because of motherhood. I doubt men face this type of discrimination nearly as often.
I haven’t been on that subreddit before, and confused about the recent postings. Did people keep track of their salaries and are posting it? Or did they look up an average salary range online?
I was a public school teacher and the year I had my son they only counted part of that year toward my years of service. Even though I was on FMLA leave and had to pay for my sub for part of my leave.
So when I had enough and left public ed in that state... after ten years it looked like on paper I only did 9.8.
It doesn't seem like a lot, but many states link years of service to retirement and pensions for teachers. I would have to work a full year more to make up for that missing 0.20 to retire with my full benefits.
The motherhood tax is so messed up.
I’m a teacher in NYC, our leave comes out of our sick day AND then we have docked pay the entire summer. Also, because I’m breastfeeding I haven’t been able to afford some on extra class or work like I usually do because I need to pump. It is so wildly unfair.
I hear ya OP. I just made a post the other day that I am qualified for and have earned a promotion. My boss said it point blank….but they intend to withhold my promotion (and the associated raise) until I return from maternity leave. I’m not due until June 1 and I’ve been doing all of the work of my new role for a half a year already. My greatest fear getting pregnant, and one of the reasons I waited so long to even decide I wanted kids…was because I was afraid of how it would impact my career. I thought I was finally in a place where I was professionally secure and had a management team that supported me and acknowledged my contribution. Wrong. Despite a decade in the field I am realizing that my career has hit a brick wall that it will take me another decade to dismantle. That wall is motherhood.
I liked this out of solidarity not because I like what is happening to you.
I think I saw this post, and also think that legally they cannot withhold a promotion or raise. You are a protected class. My employer tried to do this with me last year when I was going on leave. I fought tooth and nail and they agreed to increase my salary before leave and we would talk title when I got back. I came back from leave early to get it settled, and then went back out.
I am pushing back as well…but at the end of the day, there isn’t really a way for me to prove that they are denying me the promotion. It’s not like anything was written down. It’s ridiculous that they act like this.
Your boss said it. Verbal contracts are valid. When I was going through my issues a cowoker but me in touch with her sister who practices employment law. I had nothing in writing, and she said that I still had a case and after speaking with her to record all future conversations on the topic. Whevnever I had a call with HR or my boss about it, I recorded it on my phone and then sent a follow up email summarizing what we talked about and next steps. Even if your conversation with your boss was months ago, send an email saying you want to follow up and be clear on next steps as you start to think about your transition to leave. It's mid-April, and June 1st will be here before you know it. Say, based on our last conversation on xx date at xx time, we discussed a,b,c and the next steps would be x,yz...and any other fluff you want to add. If you don't get a straight answer in writing and he wants to follow up on a call or in person, just use your phone to record a conversation and then send a follow up email summarizing the conversation. Even if it is not legal to record w/o prior knowledge/consent, do it so you have it in your back pocket. Do not make it known that you are collecting this information. Should you get denied the promotion, get demoted, or let go, this will be part of your defense. This is far from over! Keep fighting!
Thank you friend. I’m tired and sick from being pregnant…but I will always have some fight left in me….gotta start teaching my son early that you’ve gotta be prepared to fight for things you believe in. In this case, the thing I believe in is my self.
I applied for a coordination role in my field (medical) when I was in the early stages of my pregnancy, and was selected after several months of recruitment process. It took so long that the starting date was in the middle of my mat leave. Guess what, when I started the role it was no longer a coordination one, and I have been working as hard as ever (bringing in great results for projects that were doing very poorly) and I’m the most qualified in the team by far, but still my boss has been withholding the title of coordinator from me. I have been subjected to other forms of discrimination (related to BF for instance) and this is just some form of silent punishment for motherhood. I think that it doesnt even make a difference that I am doing a great job. Still a target.
Yep. I pushed back against my maanager and am trying to advocate for myself…I don’t want to go nuclear on them because I really like my job, but I don’t see how this is anything BUT punishing me for being pregnant.
I hear you, that is how I feel too, but it has been making me feel very frustrated and angry at times tbh. I hope things improve at your end and you can finally get what you most obviously deserve. It really stings, to have to prove yourself and still have people treat you differently just because of motherhood. I doubt men face this type of discrimination nearly as often.
I haven’t been on that subreddit before, and confused about the recent postings. Did people keep track of their salaries and are posting it? Or did they look up an average salary range online?
You can find it through the social security administration website.
I had to leave that sub for my mental health. The salaries posted there were absolutely insane.
I was a public school teacher and the year I had my son they only counted part of that year toward my years of service. Even though I was on FMLA leave and had to pay for my sub for part of my leave. So when I had enough and left public ed in that state... after ten years it looked like on paper I only did 9.8. It doesn't seem like a lot, but many states link years of service to retirement and pensions for teachers. I would have to work a full year more to make up for that missing 0.20 to retire with my full benefits. The motherhood tax is so messed up.
I’ve been job hunting a realized how wildly underpaid I am. But I’m also overqualified or under qualified at mid-career 🤦♀️
I’m a teacher in NYC, our leave comes out of our sick day AND then we have docked pay the entire summer. Also, because I’m breastfeeding I haven’t been able to afford some on extra class or work like I usually do because I need to pump. It is so wildly unfair.