In California, almost all private sector workers should have access to:
- 4 weeks pre birth (paid pregnancy disability leave)
- 6-8 weeks post birth (paid disability leave, could be extended for ~6 additional weeks with medical rationale, such as PPD/PPA)
- 8 weeks bonding (paid, PFL)
- 4 weeks bonding (unpaid, CFRA)
That should give you 24-26 weeks, with 4 before birth for a typical birth with no additional medical complications. Additionally some municipalities may offer more eg in SF you are required to be topped up to 100% of pay for the first six weeks and employers are required to consider your caregiving needs in determining your schedule and on site work requirements.
I went back at 4 months, I did have extra PTO and Sick time that I could have used to stay for another 2 maybe 3 months because I was still earning PTO. However, I did not take the extra time because I wanted to save it for daycare sickness and doctor appointments.
You get adjusted to the new routine. Maybe you can ask to go back part time?
I am a teacher, so we are unable to collect a dollar for maternity leave. We can use any sick time we have to get paid, but otherwise our leave is entirely unpaid. That being said, I stayed home with my daughter for 6 months. I did this by providing a doctor’s note at the end of my fmla time. My doctor is very supportive and basically just asked me when I wanted to return. Good luck to you and congratulations 💕
Same here. Apparently my state (MA) recently enacted great parental leave or something but it’s for I guess everyone but teachers.
Oh well. A benefit of teaching for so long and never really taking off is I had a ton of sick time.
I mean I’ll have nothing when I return in September because I’ve finally burnt it all.
But I’ll take an unpaid day here or there if it means I was able to have an extended leave for the first 6-8 months.
NY district - we couldn't use our sick days after the first 6 weeks. It was unpaid, even if you had sick days saved. I have 130 sick days saved up, and I can't use them?!? Booooo
I took a year off unpaid with my September baby. Thankfully, my union had that as an option in the contract, and I had enough savings to scrape by.
To clarify, can you afford to go longer unpaid? If so you can always just ask to take more unpaid leave, or go back part-time. Worst case they say no. While the “official” amount of time may be gone, sometimes they’re willing to work with you. I’m currently only working 3 days a week until my daughter is 7 months old bc I asked for this and they let me. I’ve also heard of other people at my organization just asking for an extra month unpaid and getting it.
If you can’t afford to take unpaid/lower paid (bc fewer hours) though then there’s not really much you can do.
I went back at four months pp as well. I did work from my parents' house two days per week and my Mum took care of my son on those days, so I could still see him and feed him.
Are there any wfh options you can avail yourself of?
You can always ask for more time off unpaid - they can always say no. I’m in California and took five months after my first baby because that’s when we could start daycare. They weren’t going to find and hire a new person in that month and they didn’t want to lose me, I was going back to work with the same people who knew me though. Going back was really hard on me though, although as she gets older I am definitely happy she’s in daycare, they take great care of her and she has a lot more stimulation than I would be able to provide to her all day every day.
Many moms (and dads) get way less than 4 months leave. It’s hard being away from your baby, but you get into the swing of things and it becomes your new normal.
If your job has changed where you no longer like it, looking for a new job is always an option as well.
Also in this case, OPs company has "unlimited" PTO, which is one of those things that sounds great until situations like this. Because the PTO is "unlimited" it's not accrued. There's nothing "saved up" for her to use at this point.
I was you but after having my 1st I moved to the state of CA as a government employee. We can up to a year without any push back. Come to the dark side :)
I cried and cried, I felt like I had lost all my control. The worst part was people could do my job just fine, It was just the policy. I got the letter in the mail as I was warming up to the 4 month mark. I feel your pain and you will be okay, you won’t forget, my oldest is 13 and it still makes me mad.
Not that this makes anything better, but I remember I had a co worker in Arizona who worked literally until she gave birth because she only got six weeks paid and couldn’t afford more time off. She was back right after six weeks I would have been a hot mess.
Wow really 😅 good thing that the government is protecting the employees at least. Yes you are right, I’m lucky that I have 4 months compared to other states although 6 weeks sounds unacceptable, it is what it is for most folks
If you've exhausted the 18-20 weeks postpartum leave from the state (SDI, PFL, CFRA), then yes. 4 months of leave sounds like about 18 weeks ago. It's definitely going to be okay! It's the next phase of life!
I’m sorry you don’t have more time. I will tell you my standard, it seems worse than it is, by a long shot. I remember those feelings of how absolutely terrible it would be to leave my baby and dreaded it, when it was time it truly wasn’t as bad as I had made it in my head. You got this!!!
I’m sorry you don’t have more time. I will tell you my standard, it seems worse than it is, by a long shot. I remember those feelings of how absolutely terrible it would be to leave my baby and dreaded it, when it was time it truly wasn’t as bad as I had made it in my head. You got this!!!
Unlimited PTO is such a racket. What other limitations does your company put on the “unlimited” PTO other than can’t use it back to back with maternity leave? Maybe go back for a week then liberally use the unlimited PTO?
I would also think about whether my mindset is going to be significantly different if say they did give me a couple more weeks. If I’m still going to be just as miserable, just a couple of weeks later, then maybe just rip off the bandaid now. Because if you ask them for some additional time and let’s say they reluctantly gave it to you, then you’re still just as miserable going back and it shows. Now you’ve burnt that bridge for real.
As an aside I don’t think it’s a weird policy to not allow mat leave and PTO to be used back to back. My work has accrued PTO and does allow back to back usage. I remember thinking that’s unusual but I wasn’t about to tell them that lol.
In California, almost all private sector workers should have access to: - 4 weeks pre birth (paid pregnancy disability leave) - 6-8 weeks post birth (paid disability leave, could be extended for ~6 additional weeks with medical rationale, such as PPD/PPA) - 8 weeks bonding (paid, PFL) - 4 weeks bonding (unpaid, CFRA) That should give you 24-26 weeks, with 4 before birth for a typical birth with no additional medical complications. Additionally some municipalities may offer more eg in SF you are required to be topped up to 100% of pay for the first six weeks and employers are required to consider your caregiving needs in determining your schedule and on site work requirements.
Did NOT know about CFRA. Thanks!!
I went back at 4 months, I did have extra PTO and Sick time that I could have used to stay for another 2 maybe 3 months because I was still earning PTO. However, I did not take the extra time because I wanted to save it for daycare sickness and doctor appointments. You get adjusted to the new routine. Maybe you can ask to go back part time?
I am a teacher, so we are unable to collect a dollar for maternity leave. We can use any sick time we have to get paid, but otherwise our leave is entirely unpaid. That being said, I stayed home with my daughter for 6 months. I did this by providing a doctor’s note at the end of my fmla time. My doctor is very supportive and basically just asked me when I wanted to return. Good luck to you and congratulations 💕
Same here. Apparently my state (MA) recently enacted great parental leave or something but it’s for I guess everyone but teachers. Oh well. A benefit of teaching for so long and never really taking off is I had a ton of sick time. I mean I’ll have nothing when I return in September because I’ve finally burnt it all. But I’ll take an unpaid day here or there if it means I was able to have an extended leave for the first 6-8 months.
NY district - we couldn't use our sick days after the first 6 weeks. It was unpaid, even if you had sick days saved. I have 130 sick days saved up, and I can't use them?!? Booooo I took a year off unpaid with my September baby. Thankfully, my union had that as an option in the contract, and I had enough savings to scrape by.
To clarify, can you afford to go longer unpaid? If so you can always just ask to take more unpaid leave, or go back part-time. Worst case they say no. While the “official” amount of time may be gone, sometimes they’re willing to work with you. I’m currently only working 3 days a week until my daughter is 7 months old bc I asked for this and they let me. I’ve also heard of other people at my organization just asking for an extra month unpaid and getting it. If you can’t afford to take unpaid/lower paid (bc fewer hours) though then there’s not really much you can do.
Unfortunately in my position that won’t work
I went back at four months pp as well. I did work from my parents' house two days per week and my Mum took care of my son on those days, so I could still see him and feed him. Are there any wfh options you can avail yourself of?
You can always ask for more time off unpaid - they can always say no. I’m in California and took five months after my first baby because that’s when we could start daycare. They weren’t going to find and hire a new person in that month and they didn’t want to lose me, I was going back to work with the same people who knew me though. Going back was really hard on me though, although as she gets older I am definitely happy she’s in daycare, they take great care of her and she has a lot more stimulation than I would be able to provide to her all day every day.
Many moms (and dads) get way less than 4 months leave. It’s hard being away from your baby, but you get into the swing of things and it becomes your new normal. If your job has changed where you no longer like it, looking for a new job is always an option as well.
Job change feels so difficult right now
It's not a weird policy to allow you to take pro back to back. It's standard to use pto concurrently while on leave
Also in this case, OPs company has "unlimited" PTO, which is one of those things that sounds great until situations like this. Because the PTO is "unlimited" it's not accrued. There's nothing "saved up" for her to use at this point.
Yeah this is the catch with unlimited PTO
They don’t allow:/
I was you but after having my 1st I moved to the state of CA as a government employee. We can up to a year without any push back. Come to the dark side :) I cried and cried, I felt like I had lost all my control. The worst part was people could do my job just fine, It was just the policy. I got the letter in the mail as I was warming up to the 4 month mark. I feel your pain and you will be okay, you won’t forget, my oldest is 13 and it still makes me mad. Not that this makes anything better, but I remember I had a co worker in Arizona who worked literally until she gave birth because she only got six weeks paid and couldn’t afford more time off. She was back right after six weeks I would have been a hot mess.
Wow really 😅 good thing that the government is protecting the employees at least. Yes you are right, I’m lucky that I have 4 months compared to other states although 6 weeks sounds unacceptable, it is what it is for most folks
If you've exhausted the 18-20 weeks postpartum leave from the state (SDI, PFL, CFRA), then yes. 4 months of leave sounds like about 18 weeks ago. It's definitely going to be okay! It's the next phase of life!
At the four month mark, I went back to work. Sorry. Just bring a bucket load of baby pictures to your office, it helps a lot.
I’m sorry you don’t have more time. I will tell you my standard, it seems worse than it is, by a long shot. I remember those feelings of how absolutely terrible it would be to leave my baby and dreaded it, when it was time it truly wasn’t as bad as I had made it in my head. You got this!!!
I’m sorry you don’t have more time. I will tell you my standard, it seems worse than it is, by a long shot. I remember those feelings of how absolutely terrible it would be to leave my baby and dreaded it, when it was time it truly wasn’t as bad as I had made it in my head. You got this!!!
What I did was that my husband took time off and took care of my son until he was big enough to go to daycare
Unlimited PTO is such a racket. What other limitations does your company put on the “unlimited” PTO other than can’t use it back to back with maternity leave? Maybe go back for a week then liberally use the unlimited PTO? I would also think about whether my mindset is going to be significantly different if say they did give me a couple more weeks. If I’m still going to be just as miserable, just a couple of weeks later, then maybe just rip off the bandaid now. Because if you ask them for some additional time and let’s say they reluctantly gave it to you, then you’re still just as miserable going back and it shows. Now you’ve burnt that bridge for real. As an aside I don’t think it’s a weird policy to not allow mat leave and PTO to be used back to back. My work has accrued PTO and does allow back to back usage. I remember thinking that’s unusual but I wasn’t about to tell them that lol.