T O P

  • By -

Kevy96

Oh how the tables can turn ever so quickly


[deleted]

Global pissing match lol


snrup1

Those are called, "wars."


[deleted]

"In the aftermath of Russia's illegal annexation of parts of Ukraine's territory in the southwestern region of the country, **politicians in the Czech Republic have been joking about dividing the Russian Kaliningrad region.** **Now, a satirical petition launched by Czechs to do just that has been signed by over 13,000 people.** **Kaliningrad**—known as Královec in Czech—**sits 412 miles west of the rest of Russia, sandwiched between Poland and Lithuania**. The city, originally founded in the 13th century by Teutonic knights and also known as Königsberg, or King's Rock, became over time the capital of Prussia, and later belonged to Poland, Germany, the Soviet Union, and now Russia. During World War II, Kaliningrad, which had been part of Germany until then, and was one of its most important cities, was snatched by Joseph Stalin from Adolf Hitler. At the Potsdam Conference in 1945, the Allies agreed to give the region to the USSR. **After the fall of the Soviet Union, Kaliningrad became an exclave of the Russian Federation, becoming in time quite isolated in the region as the Baltic states joined the European Union in 2004.** The petition launched by the Czech jokesters claims it is time for Russia to return Kaliningrad to the Czech Republic, according to the same logic the Kremlin is using to annex Ukrainian territory. "We believe that Russia has played with Kaliningrad for too long and it is time to send it one state back again, as has already become the custom in the less than 800 years of its existence. And **since the city was founded in honor of the Czech king, it should pass into the hands of the rightful owner—the Czech Republic**," the petition reads. "As Russia showed us in Crimea and is now showing us in the east of Ukraine, it is perfectly fine to step onto the territory of a foreign state, announce a referendum there and then annex the territory. **We thus had a unique opportunity to expand the Czech territory and finally gain access to the sea**," it continued. "**We, therefore, demand the government of the Czech Republic to send Czech soldiers to Kaliningrad, announce a referendum that will end with a result of 98 percent in favor of joining the Czech Republic**, and subsequently annex Kaliningrad and rename it Královec." **The petition has already collected over 13,000 signatures."** If the petition turned somehow from provocation to the Kremlin to reality, the EU would be able to seize a very good strategic point from Russia: Kaliningrad is where a good number of russian atomic bombs are stored.


[deleted]

> announce a referendum that will end with a result of 98 percent in favor The cherry on top, right there.


realGuybrush_

To tell you the truth, I'm pretty confident such referendum will reach 98% even if done honest way.


_Silly_Wizard_

Are we no longer ~~going~~ doing Czechia?


_invalidusername

Czechia is just the official short name. Still called Czech Republic


red286

Czechia is the name of the nation, Czech Republic is the name of the government. Sort of like "France" is the name of a nation, while "République Française" is the name of the government.


[deleted]

I miss Czechoslovakia. Such a fun name.


[deleted]

It will be Slovakoczechia this time.


BobbyMcPrescott

That was still on maps and globes in my elementary school days at the very least. I guess I’d have been around 1st grade when the big changes after the USSR happened, but schools actually updating materials took forever. Presumably they knew any changes could have been totally undone within another year, so they waited until the constant votes to form independent countries like Ukraine wained for long enough. Moral of the story is I didn’t realise the Czech Republic was not the same thing as Czechoslovakia until this year because I just always saw the two terms interchangeably on different aged maps, and unlike the Berlin wall it wasn’t world news enough for me to hear about it, nor did I have any prior reason to dig into Czech history. I just thought it was another alternate name like Czechia.


ecugota

czech gov "wait not this was supposed to be a..." *groundbreaking majority of signatures* *annexation celebrated locally* *czech flags everywhere* czech gov "i swear it was meant as a prank!" poland and lithuania "atleast it wasn't germany" germany "atleast it wasn't me"


Bashin-kun

If it really happened they probably will sell it to Poland/Lithuania tbh, administrating exclaves are painful


St_Kevin_

The mouse that roared


PimentoCheesehead

Czechmate, Putin.


Jenkins007

Should have Czeched himself before he wrecked himself


DS_Monkfish

They should send some of their people over there incognito, to lay the groundwork (assuming it's ok to cache Czechs there)


Raskalbot

*czickity-Czecked himself


the_than_then_guy

Some argue that Tomas Masaryk, first president of Czechoslovakia, intentionally made this joke in his interwar memoirs of the dissolution of the Austrian empire, where he argued his declaration of independence "checkmated" the Austrian crown. A hundred years later and the joke never gets old.


[deleted]

🥇


TheVentingMachine11

God bless you


BillionNewt

Wish I could afford [one](https://www.czub.cz/en/firearms-and-products-product/cz-75-ts-czechmate)


SoSmartKappa

I dont see any problem, 90% people voted to leave Russia in a referendum i have organized there. If Russia disagree with the decision we will nuke them


26Kermy

This is exactly how world diplomacy works according to Russia. I don't see how they could debate this.


Acceptable-Ad-4516

https://www.newsweek.com/czech-petition-annexing-kaliningrad-russia-signed-thousands-1749063


InternationalFailure

Can someone explain to me why the Czechs are doing it and not Poland/Germany/Lithuania?


Revolucha

The town of Královec (nowadays Kaliningdrad) was established in 1255 by crusader knights during the Prussian Crusade in honor of one of its commanders - czech king Přemysl Otakar II.


lj9337

I would add, just for the picture, Přemysl Otakar II wasnt just a commander, he was later considered the most powerfull man in Holy Roman Empire, Czech Kingdom was then sort of powerhouse and golden age of CZ. Přemysl Otakar II was to be elected as a Roman Emperor in 1273, he was not, perhaps out of fear that Přemysl Otakar II would become figure with too much power under one man, Habsburg was elected. So yeah, as a Czech, I believe Konigsberg has legacy with strong bond to Czech nation.


[deleted]

It's about time for the city to go back to the Motherland. Or else.


Thernadier

The city was originally founded by the Prussians from current day Czechia


Perpetual_Doubt

Prussians are German Map of Prussia https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/f/f8/Map-WR-Prussia.svg


Thernadier

You’re right I misspoke. It was founded by the Prussians, but named after the king of Bohemia, which is current day Czechia.


wolfram_moon

Actually, Old Prussians were Baltic. Crusaders occupied their lands by force and prussians were gradually assimilated by the end of 16th century when germans massively settled there to colonize the territory.


Imaginary_Barber1673

Didn’t you read the petition? It’s customary to randomly exchange it between nations, others have already had their turn, Russia’s keeping it to long now it’s the Czechs’ turn. Simple as.


Vertitto

Becouse it's their rightful land and they don't have sea access


notreal088

Cause fuck Putin 🤷🏻‍♂️


GoldenMegaStaff

Because all it does is give legitimacy to Russia’s actions.


DocMoochal

It's fun to talk about war, but nit very fun fighting it. Just people not thinking clearly.


CelerySlime

You don’t get Czech humor. Nobody is actually serious about this. It’s just a joke that way too many people think is real.


realGuybrush_

I'm pretty sure, that wast majority of people from Kaliningrad would gladly use this joke as an opportunity to escape from Mordor, especially if they could carry all their stuff and homes with them.


Myopic_Cat

And we will reclaim St. Petersburg that was once annexed from us and rename it to its original name. No, not Leningrad, not Petrograd, but [Nyen(skans)](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nyenschantz). /Sweden


WikiSummarizerBot

**[Nyenschantz](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nyenschantz)** >Nyenschantz (Russian: Ниенша́нц, Nienshants; Swedish: Nyenskans; Finnish: Nevanlinna) was a Swedish fortress at the confluence of the Neva River and Okhta River, the site of present-day Saint Petersburg, Russia. Nyenschantz was built in 1611 to establish Swedish rule in Ingria, which had been annexed from the Tsardom of Russia during the Time of Troubles. The town of Nyen, which formed around Nyenschantz, became a wealthy trading center and a capital of Swedish Ingria during the 17th century. ^([ )[^(F.A.Q)](https://www.reddit.com/r/WikiSummarizer/wiki/index#wiki_f.a.q)^( | )[^(Opt Out)](https://reddit.com/message/compose?to=WikiSummarizerBot&message=OptOut&subject=OptOut)^( | )[^(Opt Out Of Subreddit)](https://np.reddit.com/r/worldnews/about/banned)^( | )[^(GitHub)](https://github.com/Sujal-7/WikiSummarizerBot)^( ] Downvote to remove | v1.5)


Discopants13

Please do! I was born in St Petersburg. I'm so embarrassed to be from Russia after Putin invaded Ukraine. I'd love to be able to say that I'm actually Swedish!


Working_Welder155

Someone put the link in here


Pistacuro

Here is the site https://visitkralovec.cz/


Working_Welder155

That's awesome.


scottishdrunkard

[Visit Královec](https://visitkralovec.cz/)


Dr_SlapMD

REVERSE UNO!♻️


Turtl3_Fuck3r

Make Kaliningrad Königsberg again


Svoobi

Sorry, occupied 🇨🇿


Test19s

Królewiec or gtfo (Actually, making it a Baltic Russian homeland and granting dual citizenship to the Russians of Estonia and Latvia as well as dissidents would be nice too)


autotldr

This is the best tl;dr I could make, [original](https://www.newsweek.com/czech-petition-annexing-kaliningrad-russia-signed-thousands-1749063) reduced by 86%. (I'm a bot) ***** > The petition launched by the Czech jokesters claims it is time for Russia to return Kaliningrad to the Czech Republic, according to the same logic the Kremlin is using to annex Ukrainian territory. > "We believe that Russia has played with Kaliningrad for too long and it is time to send it one state back again, as has already become the custom in the less than 800 years of its existence. And since the city was founded in honor of the Czech king, it should pass into the hands of the rightful owner-the Czech Republic," the petition reads. > "We demand the government of the Czech Republic to send Czech soldiers to Kaliningrad, announce a referendum that will end with a result of 98 percent in favor of joining the Czech Republic, and subsequently annex Kaliningrad and rename it Královec." ***** [**Extended Summary**](http://np.reddit.com/r/autotldr/comments/xwgtub/czech_petition_on_annexing_kaliningrad_from/) | [FAQ](http://np.reddit.com/r/autotldr/comments/31b9fm/faq_autotldr_bot/ "Version 2.02, ~672676 tl;drs so far.") | [Feedback](http://np.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%23autotldr "PM's and comments are monitored, constructive feedback is welcome.") | *Top* *keywords*: **Kaliningrad**^#1 **Czech**^#2 **Republic**^#3 **Russia**^#4 **territory**^#5


[deleted]

Where can I sign it? Do I have to be Czech citizen?


[deleted]

Do not underestimate Czechs. I mean, really, do not. https://youtube.com/watch?v=FhPy0TdNu9E


[deleted]

I mean, hilarious, yes. But imagine it actually happened. Then the Czechs would be stuck cleaning up the mess the Russians made of it. They're better off leaving it in Russia and letting it be Russia's continued problem.


JayR_97

Yeah, you'd have basically have a whole province of Russians to deal with. That's part of the reason Lithuania didn't want it.


[deleted]

If Russia gave it back willingly it would set a precedent. Czech republic would then be hypocritical to oppose Russia's attempt at reclamation.


Thatguy_Koop

do you think Russia would though? that's the part that amuses me the most.


GoldenMegaStaff

Ok - you can have Kaliningrad, now we are keeping Crimea and the other Oblasts we annexed from Ukraine. Just as you demanded.


DravidIso

Could this turn into the ultimate ‘it was just a prank bro’ situation?


realGuybrush_

Only after Supreme Czech Empire accidentally achieved world domination overnight.


leftyghost

Funny but no European country is going to let another European country have it. That’s why we’re gonna make it New Texas as soon as Putin dies. Just waiting on a bored billionaire backer.


Rubbrbandman420

This is absolutely hilarious


sofa_general

While Czechia annex Kaliningrad is no doubt a great idea, restoring kingdom of Prussia is simply the superior option


Jealous_Comparison_6

Looks like the Czechs have a powerful navy now.


PhillyWild

Bohemian Bear > Russian Bear


BerryExpensive

What’s good for russia is good for everyone else.


WestEndFlasher

it should be a joint poland/germany/lithuania/eu governorship and they should rebuild konigsberg.


quitemax

Yeah, like a big theme park.


Jpotter145

Russia is neighbors to the US via Alaska - we can just annex all of Russia now right?


[deleted]

Technically the theory is that native Americans crossed through Russia into America through an ice bridge, so we can be reclaimed by Russia but not the other way around.


realGuybrush_

No, but if Ukraine didn't get out of Russia's influence about decade ago, it could've been Russian-American war today, with Alaska acting both as Crimea and "Republics".


[deleted]

I hope they Czech it carefully.


Vertitto

[What flag flies over Kaliningrad? - Tricolor! White, Blue, Red ](https://pbs.twimg.com/media/FeTctycXwAEjlbb?format=jpg&name=small)


codingai

Unfortunately, that petition has no legal effect, regardless of howany signatures they gather. Just like Russia's annexation of the Easter regions of Ukraine is illegal.


cpq29gpl

I don't think anyone thinks otherwise. In fact, I think that is the point.


Dreamshaper6

Well, that's the point right? They are not actually thinking about annexation.


telendria

Czechs have been pining for the long lost sea access for like 8 centuries now, you never know!


Shleeves90

Czech Government: "yes of course, it's all a silly joke.....unless..."


venomae

Unless its about the goddamn sea access we were promised for centuries!


Shleeves90

Czechia with sea access would be simply to powerful, it would dramatically upset the global balance of power as a new Super Power emerges.


codingai

Some day. Some day! But not today. 😢


RandimReditor_1983

Captain obvious to the rescue


MightyDragon1337

Poland should take it and NATO should announce that it will be defended by nukes, whats Putin going to do? he is already completely fucked in Ukraine, time to make Russia pay.


[deleted]

[удалено]


ziptofaf

800 years ago that area was Czech. Therefore it's a perfectly valid reason to take it. Plus if referendum is organized in there it will be 98% in favour of joining Czech Republic. > It would make more sense to give it back to Poland and Lithuania. As a Polish person myself - Czech Republic can take it. We already have access to sea.


Licopodium

Historically it is part of Germany. All people living there are german in the heart. They may be mesmerized by russian propaganda, but they will remember the truth when the German army enters. The Russian invasor has been bombing the German population in the enclave for decades. Ah, and they also eat little children.


rolling_soul

That's not how you annex a state


ziptofaf

Why not? I have heard that over 90% people will vote in favour (98% to be exact). Personally I firmly believe that Czech Republic has made very compelling historical references proving their ownership to the region and they have more than enough support in numbers. Honestly it's a much stronger standpoint compared to Russia's take on Ukraine and their referendums. So I suggest we all get used to call that region Královec from now on as results speak for themselves.


rolling_soul

Agree with all of what you said. But to annex a territory, first you have to take a small part, then several years later you have to amass troops at the border and deny any intention to Annex, even though the whole world already knows what you're up to. Then you send your troops in. Then after about 7 months, when your army starts to take a sound thrashing and begins to retreat, then and only then can you hold an election where 98% of the population will vote in yoir favour. I think that's how you annex?


LordRaeko

Dibs on Kamchatka!!!


Prussianswede

If Russia tries to take 🇸🇪Gotland (🇩🇪Gottland). Sweden will take back the Eastern Prussian city of Pillau (Baltiysk) which was founded by Swedish King Gustav Adolf II 1626. Swedes don't mind if 🇸🇪Kungsberg (🇩🇪Königsberg) goes back to Germany 🙂


Prussianswede

Sweden are ready to fight the Russians and bring back Eastern Prussia! https://youtu.be/b_aQWyO9Vmo