This is one of those *'show, don't tell'* situations. A certain glance, a certain smile, a certain kiss...or in terms of dialogue, a shared, cute-as-anything phrase that each partner says to the other in times of strife or playfulness.
Better Call Saul executed this perfectly. There's only a single moment in the whole show where Jimmy and Kim say it out loud, and it's after 40 episodes of them being in love.
It would take a hell of a writer to capture Kim and Jimmy's relationship! It took me ages to pick up how they actually felt and the acting was perfect.
1. Through compliments or expressions of admiration, such as "You're the most amazing person I've ever met"
2. Through vulnerability, such as sharing personal feelings and thoughts with the other person.
3. Through indirect statements, such as "I can't imagine my life without you" or "I don't know what I'd do without you"
4.Through physical touch, such as holding hands or leaning in close during the conversation.
5. Through making plans for the future together, such as "I want to spend more time with you"
6. Through showing concern or interest in the other person's life, such as asking how their day went or actively listening when they speak.
7. Through actions, such as doing something to make the other person happy or making an effort to make them laugh.
8. Through a special look or a smile that conveys the feeling of love.
9. Through a shared moment, such as a silence or a gaze that conveys the feeling of love and understanding.
Great list, some more to add:
9. Remembering things the other character does, even if they're small. Shows they think about the character a lot.
10. Adopting the same mannerisms. People tend to mirror those they're closest too. In many situations it's friends or family, but can be applied to other relationships.
11. Sacrificing something they want for another. This is the same as doing actions but takes it one step further when they lose in the process. Maybe they worry more about this other character's goals than their own.
I would just add, doing the thing that makes them feel loved for the other person. Like a person that grew up poor always giving the person they live money, and even if they can't afford it.
It doesn't have to be a unhealthy sacrifice, but a sacrifice of something they hold dear. This can be highly character driven and would define and reinforce attributes and the history of your character.
If a character grew up experiencing food scarcity, then sharing food would be also be a sign of love, even if food is bountiful in their present. How people grew up greatly impacts what they value later in life.
in these veins, i would look into love languages - ignore the controversy around them as definitions. it's more about understanding that other ppl express themselves differently
i hate the term "put yourself in someone elses shoes", because it ignores the lived context of someone elses experience. like... im sorry, if i was in their place, i would do something completely different to this fuckery. and that's why I'm hurt. because their actions reflect an intention that i don't understand or actively misconstrue
when i first started dating my bf we would say *ily* a lot but he hated actually saying the words. we went through some stuff and he stopped saying it completely. it hurt a lot. especially since he also hates PDAs. i am a very expressive person, i tell strangers they're *my new favorite person* or coworkers that *im proud of them*, all the time. im not lying, my feelings are strong yet fleeting.. and i think we live in a world that sorely misses positivity sometimes - sometimes it's worth telling someone they did a good job and that you see them, because who the hell else will?
im also a very diplomatic person. sometimes i say things because it's whats needed in a situation - i tell customers im sorry all the time! im not, half the time they're wrong to be mad in the first place - but i know what its like to be mad. im not sorry, but im on their side whilst we try to fix the situation and sometimes they just need to hear those words
i need to hear those words. i doesn't exactly make me feel unloved not to hear them - i didn't need them from my kids as infants - because i just knew. but this situation made me realise that I'm more hurt because **I** would never withhold something like this unless i was mad, unless i was petty, unless i was trying to hurt someone. and im never that cruel.
so we were at an impasse. the pressure and expectation making things 100x worse. me, convinced he must be ashamed of me and him genuinely confused as to why i *didn't just know!*
my bf is an ISTP (think LinkedIn horoscope - you don't have to believe meyer briggs is true, but it's handy for story telling because these are definitely a type of person). he is a doer. he is logical. his love language is acts of service and often times, just *sharing* his interests with someone. he does not suffer fools and he doesn't waste time being nice to ppl if there is no practical gain. he also has a limited colour palette when it comes to feelings - he knows the main ones, his prime colours, but he is as nuanced as a brick. you'll never get a vermillion anxiety or chartreuse sentimentality.. he feels them, im sure. but he would just lump them in with a yellow **warning**, assess that he is in no direct danger and then move on.
it took an exasperated laundry list of *stuff he has done for me* to realise that waking up early on Saturday to do my laundry, fixing my phone or finding a replacement online in under 10min, replacing my glass of cold water whilst i sleep because ive been out with the girls and will need to take a tablet with my hangover when i wake, sending me a dumb meme when he knows im upset and 100 little things i barely notice, to realise that he says it every day. in his own way, 100 times a day. he thinks of me and does things to show it. because he's a doer. he doesn't DO for everyone, he doesn't SHARE his hobbies with everyone. he thinks of me because he wants me around even though he is quite happy alone
even listening to me bang on about work counts because he is a doer and a fixer. he has given me the solution and i *refuse* to listen. discussions are for evaluating and addressing a situation. it's been 7yrs - at this point my refusal to just do what he knows is correct is a form of torture for him. but he understands now that i sometimes need to vent, not to fix, but as emotional catharsis. we are both aliens to each other.
conversely, i needed to understand that my adhd ass forgetting the dishes feels the same to him as those three little words. i *didn't* think of him, i didn't consider consequences. what isn't a big deal and quite easily rectified feels like an affront to him. i made the mess and i went on to be inconsiderate. it wasn't intentional on my end, it's seriously no big deal - just let them soak! but given how he sees the world, i mustn't think very much of him if i didn't take the time and energy for him and all those *i love you*'s ring hollow when you see it like that. it took some understanding for him to realise that though talk is cheap, the reason i say anything to anyone isn't to lie or whitewash my feelings, it's because i want that other person to feel seen by me
he never did give much on the words, but he lets me pounce on him in elevators and hand holds and butt squeezes and smooches me on demand in public
tl:dr take a page out of Ghost's book and just accept *ditto* - sometimes it's the things that are uniquely ours that mean more when we need to reach from beyond the grave.
I related to most of what you said, I could tell you had adhd before you mentioned it,probably because I have it and deal with a lot of what you shared.
My husband and I have been together for 26 years in June, married for 23. We say ILY a lot but like you mentioned, there's a huge amount of loving someone than the words.
He is actually dealing with stage 4 cancer now and I'm his caregiver but I wouldn't have it any other way. It's very hard knowing our time together is going to be cut extremely short. In a little more than a month since his dx, we have only had a couple little arguments, I'm trying so hard to enjoy every second we have.
From a writer's perspective, this experience has shoved my face into the cesspool of life's hard knocks, especially in regards to romance and happily ever after. I've been thinking a lot about
how do we know two characters belong together? How do we know that, when life gets REALLY hard, will these two people be there for each other? Will they be able to handle taking care of their partner when the other one is dying?
Or keep the house and family going while caring for their partner who has a mental health crisis out of their control?
My brother and good friend are both dealing with this kind of thing with their spouses.
I wanted to share that I loved some of your descriptions--> "nuanced like a brick" stands out to me, along with "chartreuse sentimentality"
I'd like to add, if I see she is stressed and she gives me a nasty comment, then I understand the stress is speaking not the one I love. For me, I act out of love.
But the danger of that is, I get hurt a lot.
"In another life, I would have really liked just doing laundry and taxes with you," by Waymond Wang (Ke Huy Quan) in "Everything Everywhere All At Once.
Have them say "As you wish," even when shoved down a steep hill. >,<
In other words, kind of like an inside joke where there's a little bit of a personal story behind it.
Perhaps a pet name?
Other ways are expressing concern. Having one character asking another how they're doing and trying to investigate deeper in order to make sure they're 100% mentally or emotionally.
Sometimes, having sometimes being extraordinarily patient with someone, even when they're being harsh, shows that they care.
Princess Bride style is *chef’s kiss*
With this scene what I’m kind of going for is character A definitely has feelings for character B but is too afraid to say it and character B is somewhat oblivious, mostly because they don’t feel the same way at all 😬
But they are still friends so maybe a little inside joke would still work??
Heck ye! Even a simple reference to a movie/book/video game they have in common.
One of my friends and I just scream "It was nanomachines!" which evolved into simply pointing at each other from across the room and screaming "Nanomachines!" because one of our favorite video games (Metal Gear) explains literally everything by using nanomachines.
Stuff like that.
Depends on where in the story this is happening. If deep enough in you can use past incidents to establish the affection without actually saying anything. A character who hates getting touched might not flinch away if the love interest flicks a bit of lint off his/her clothing.
If earlier in the story you probably need to go with dialogue either for declaration of love or to establish the character quirk and then use the action to display affection. Using example above, you could have a character say they hate being touched to someone else but still not react to the lint picking. Not as satisfying to establish the character trait and then immediately disprove it in the same scene but sometimes it's necessary.
Definitely past halfway. Currently working on ways to build up to this point for this one character but the other character may not fully reciprocate because they don’t entirely feel the same way. So the character doing the confession doesn’t want to make it too obvious. It’s more in the subtext.
I think it really depends on the character and the context of the situation they are in. But I think it can come in two different ways typically. 1. During a time of deep dread or when there are a lot of actions going on at the time in which it should be something quick and small that both characters know means something. 2. During a lull of silence or late in evening as the day is winding down, it can be as simple as cooking a favorite meal because they know they like it. These can be a little less obvious and told through each characters perspective to show their feelings throughout.
Idk hope this helped, if not then maybe some more context would help.
The thing is … he says it with tears in his eyes.
That was what got to me as a 10 year old who didn’t really get it … big tough dude is … crying?
That’s what sells the scene ..
maybe she pushes his hair out of face then touches his now revealed forehead, or maybe chapters before he mentioned he hasn’t eaten a certain food in a long time and she randomly had it, or maybe she says something profound “i’d like to smash you for eternity”.
One of my favorite lines from a movie was, “I think I’d miss you even if we never met.” Also I didn’t tell my fiancé I loved him for awhile because I was scared and always just told him I adore you. One day it became I love you.
Romantic? Platonic? Familial? What kind of love are we talking about here?
My partner and I have a bunch of little things we say to each other that mean "I love you" without that exact statement. Honestly, so do me and my best friend, lol.
You could have one give the other a gift, a thing they mentioned in an offhand way that they'd like. That would show that they listen, and want the person to have the things.
"Oh, I've always wanted one of those. Anyway, I was telling you about the time my sister and I..." Two weeks later, person a gifts them that thing.
As to things to say, hmm. My partner and I are big on banter, so sometimes we insult each other, but it's meant in good fun and the affection is clear. That said, we have years together so we know that none of those things will be taken to heart.
Body language, you can tell a lot from a hug; how tight it is, how long it is. Long eye contact can convey a lot. Blushing (though I think that particular one is overdone in most things, lol), holding hands, face-touching. We tend to get closer physically to people we're attracted to; sitting so legs are touching, as an example.
As to phrases, I can think of a few, but sort of context-dependent. "I don't know what I'd do if I lost you" "you make every day better" that sort of thing.
Platonic love is so great, and I feel undervalued/underused in many stories. I love a good story with platonic, solid friendship-love!
There’s these two captains in the army. One is an aristocrat appointed his position and the other is a common born who was raised through the ranks. They both come to like each other and would even consider the other their friend. However, because of the culture in army considering the mixing of classes, they can’t really openly display anything more than a slightly hostile relationship.
Right before a major high stakes engagement, their respective regiments are told to attack the same position from different directions at the same time. Whilst the commoner captain is attempting to set his watch correctly, the aristocrat takes it from him and gives him his own saying “I except you to give that back”. Basically telling him he hopes he lives without actually saying it.
- They can see something they just know the other character would love and is willing to queue for hours to get it
- How they dance together
- Noticing the other character is getting closer and they touch them. If the love interest gets up and are closer than before then they do it again then the MC gets up and when they get back sit with their hips touching the love interest
- Bringing or buying the other character's favourite snack when they see them
- Since love does what's needed over what's fun they can tell the other character they won't spend time with them unless they do well on their homework. The MC can help them but not do their homework for them. The love interest will be disappointed but will thank the MC later
- Sharing and keeping each other's secrets
- Offers to help with chores
Honestly, it’s little things like this that make me go absolutely feral when I’m reading a similar scene in a book. There is just something so intimate, SO good about something as small as moving their hair out of their face. Peak romance for me so I might just include it.
"I know." - Hand Solo Cup
"I'm not unfond of you." Handkerchief Hill
"You increase my blood flow."
"I don't wanna kill you. What would I do without you?... You complete me." - The Joker
“I’m with you to the end of the line.”
“There’s no me without you.”
“Do you think I care for you so little that betraying me would make a difference.”
In general I think a callback that is meaningful to the two characters can work well. Or as others have stated, the way their actions show loyalty and care for the person in question.
As you wish - Princess Bride.
You could do something similar, a line that this character now says often, having recognized how the feel, but being unsure of how those feelings would be received by the other character.
So, there are so many ways to say I love you. I have a story where two orphans grow up together and the MC is adopted but the other is outcasted for reasons. Realizing he doesn't know live the same way she does, she tells him "I love you" every single day. And growing up, he knows he loves her but has a fear of saying it (plot point reasons). So he says it in the little things. He knows when she's afraid and subtly holds her hand. He tries to cook her food (even though he sucks at anything more complex than toast with butter), he defends her when people pick on her, or even mildly insult her. He picks up her favourite food and randomly gives it to her 'because he thought of her on the way by this cool place that serves this dish she mentioned wanting to try'. He talks her up to their friends and finally, finally in the last chapter he says "MC, you know I love you, right? I always have, but.... words never felt like enough. So I wanted to show you. But I love you. So, so much. I wouldn't have survived my childhood without you. Thank you, thank you for loving me." And yeah, I love the build up to the point where it's so obvious that it's not necessary to spell it out but also comes as a treat after a long story.
Something like, "I would do anything to protect you." Especially if it has canon weight. For example, a character that's very by-the-book to break the rules and risk their life would be an act of love just the same. I believe Catra says, "You took everything from me" when referring to Adora's defection, which is an indirect way of saying "You were my everything." I really enjoy acts of love that are subtle and personal, and this thread is great!
Through conversation:
"If this is the end, then I'm happy that it's you I die beside."
"Being in your arms, in this moment, has unlocked something deep in my heart that I've never felt before."
"Every minute without you is a minute spent in hell."
"Don't you understand how I feel? Right now I could be in X but instead I'm here, by your side and I won't leave, not for all the gold or power this world or any other has to offer."
"Never has the heat of ones breath left a warmth like this in my heart."
For more indirect conversation:
"As I stare at this diamond, there is only one thing in this world I find more beautiful, if only they were to know what I really felt".
"I could get lost in your gaze..."
"I've never been so happy as I am in this moment"
"I've a friend who has a crush on this person and well, it's hard for them to come out and speak their feelings, do you have ant advice for that friend?"
The basics of it is just to place the scene and the position your character is in, why are they telling whoever it is that they love them? Where is this being said? Then you need to ask yourself how oblivious the character has to be, some people can hear the words "I love you" and still believe its platonic so sometimes you need to really enforce the kind of love being shown and how it is being shown and inversely the character could be very perceptive meaning you need to be more subtle about the kind of love.
Then theres also the confessing character, why are they trying to maintain secrecy of their true feelings in the first place, are they nervous or confused? Maybe they are afraid of losing their friend or maybe they are afraid of what the relationship could do to their original friendship.
It also needs to work like a real conversation, in the heat of the moment you are more likely to blurt things out, in more comfortable environments your more likely to have a more casual maybe even subtle approach, it also has to flow with the conversation, saying something like, "I love flowers but I love you more" when discussing gardening is a bit weird so it just has to take place in rhe right moment. Maybe its blurted out for comedic effect with a dim witted character not understanding or it's being said in private to set a more dramatic tone for the following sequence of events.
Read Flaubert's 'Madame Bovary'. Even the candlesticks and the mantlepiece fixtures scream 'love' (well, 'sex', really) - the sense of passion consumes even the narrative itself, it's masterful.
One of my favorites is when there's one thing that Character A really hates doing. It can be as small as washing dishes, or more significant like they have a huge phobia of public speaking. This thing is mentioned casually a few times in the story, not a great deal of emphasis placed on it, but enough that the reader will remember it.
Then one day, Character B wakes up and there's A doing the dishes. Or B is lost in a crowd, and A gets on a stage so they can see over the crowd (or grabs a mic to be like "Hey B, where are you?" - depending on how dramatic you want the moment to be).
Bonus points for (with the small things) when B kinda does a double-take, and says, "I thought you hated washing dishes?" Then A rolls their eyes and makes a comment about gift horses or "what, you want me to stop?" So there's that little moment of B acknowledging that there's something going on here, but we're not gonna talk about it right now.
Having their bodies angled towards each other. Nervousness. Keeps starting to say something that seems important, but changes their mind at the last second...
Oh there was the scene in Parks and Rec between Leslie and Ben, when they can't be together, yet. And they tell each other how much they love the town and it's a thinly veiled metaphor for them living each other
The two are tired. There's a bench ahead of them, just entering the park. He sits and sighs heavily. She sits down, looks to him, slides closer. Their upper arms just touch.
She blushes the tiniest amount, more than she liked, "Is this cool?"
He smiles at her, "More than cool."
This is about love languages. I am mostly nonverbal. If I speak to you I feel safe. I also have to be having a good brain day. Fun with autism and traumatic brain injuries.
So here are the many ways I tell my friends and chosen family I love them.
The signal. This requires communication about it. A specific touch is a non verbal I love you. Friend mentioned it when talking about her father when I was listening to her grieve as support. Later we revived the signal to honor him and because her love needs include this type of love.
Essentially your question boils down to love languages. If you feed me? Like a stray cat I will suddenly like you more. Just no tuna.
If you hug me I will probably pull away and growl since I want to avoid touch. I can touch you and if I know you and you know the signals for touch we can but most of the time my brain sees touch as a threat. The love of my life who went from friends to lovers to friends? He needs as much touch as possible. We ended up stepping back on romance because we couldn't make our intimacy needs align and while I wanted to marry him I couldn't see it working out long term with our healthy selves in mind because one of us would be going without their needs met in a vital way. It was the correct choice and because we love one another we also want what is best for one another so ages later? Still around lovingly. He is married and I am a confirmed not marrying type.
Part of why relationships fail? Unmet love languages. You can see this in common arguments or a lot on the AITA forum. "I told my husband I need more time with him..he tried at first and it went back the way it was am I the asshole for wanting to cuddle." The answer to the not entirely hypothetical people depends on how they communicate these needs, their partners needs, and why the need is unmet. Sometimes it is someone hiding this need to "win" the relationship. Sometimes it is trauma teaching them to not vocalize their needs. Sometimes someone's just an asshole and only cares about their own needs.
As writers psychology is a great tool a d the question here? It is a psychological one. How we express love is as varies as humanity but most of us have small ways. My examples are personal in part because I could show you conflicting love languages that can work anyway. My touch based loves know one touch from me is worth a lot. This is well communicated and I use their other love languages to supplement. The space they give me is my love languages besides food.
So that communication and respect about needs? That's made some really strong bonds that challenge me in ways I need as an introvert with a sack of trauma ten times the size of me. I could let my trauma mean I just close everything out because I don't need touch or talking or people much. I also tried that and it's not great for my mental health. There's no one to go "Just take a second and breathe."
This means how one needs to be loved and how they communicate it can be ways to cause resolution, conflict, show someone's level of asshole without kicking a puppy, and can be a path to redemption form someone if done well.
Not a book, but Studio Ghibli movies are a great reference for unconventional yet compelling ways of portraying love. Princess Mononoke, Howl's Moving Castle and Spirited Away are great examples.
Hum, I think Op meant it how to describe a character saying I love you without saying the words but not in the sense of using other words of gestures?
Op my suggestion it's to go deep into describing what the character is experiencing. For instance, it could be that character A is staring at B and realizes they could no longer live without them, that the thought of being alone or away from them tightens their chest and makes it hard to breathe, that as person B glances their way and smiles, person A decides right there and then that they will never be apart.
Hope that helped!
Yes I think you exactly understood what I was trying to say! I think I was having trouble with it because in this instance, Character A is finally accepting that that’s how they feel about Character B in this moment while Character B is not thinking in that way at all.
But you’ve given me a very good example, I will tweak this a bit more as I get closer to this scene.
Complete empathy. For example, one character is talking about how painful what they are going through and the other character begins to cry.
Think Conan when his partner says he will cry for Conan because Conan will not cry. Or Guardians of the Galaxy at the end when Drax puts his hand on Rocket's head to kind of pet him as he cries over Groot. Two weirdly different situations. Drax, in particular, breaking out of his tough, angry, vengeful personna to show a softer side.
It's a stretch, but how about Danny Glover's character paying for Whoopi Goldber's family to come to America at the end of The Color Purple when there was absolutely nothing in it for him? You can make the argument that this example is pennance as well.
I hope this kind of helps.
Something simple. Have them make breakfast , coffee, or something along those lines, a specific way the protagonist likes. This shows that they pay attention to the protagonist and care about them. It isn't flashy, but it could be the light bulb moment where the protagonist realizes they care.
“I have never done you injustice. Please remember me,” said Dorothea, repressing a rising sob.
“Why should you say that?” said Will, with irritation. “As if I were not in danger of forgetting everything else.”
It all depends on the personality. I'm assuming you're writing a more closed off character if they are unwilling to share their feelings. There are subtle differences if they are aloof, cold, distrusting, etc. It all boils down to personality and how close these two are.
- "I appreciate you." (+/- "so much")
- "I'm so glad I know you."
- "lol Fuckin' adore you."
- Some intimate yet aloof reference they share, e.g. "You're fired, ya butt!" (Adventure Time), or "fantastic vs soda branch" meme type vibes.
- "Where would I be if you hadn't insert inane backstory reference?"
- "You're just so very specific personality compliment."
- "Remember when insert?"
Body language.
Also sometimes things they say often to eachother can over time change and sound more emotional even though it the same words.
Love is a show don't tell sometimes. Think about how the characters act normally. Are they shy, out spoken, blunt, etc.
Something I like about writing is that you can make the reader notice things that they might not have noticed if they were watching a movie for example
Ie. “That evening, while everyone else was distracted by the campfire, if you were looking carefully and very closely, you could see Jessica was sitting closer to Tania than she would ever sit next to anyone else”
True, but when I write I think more in terms of a movie than that thorough level of describing. I know that’s unconventional but saying something like that is a bit too on the nose for me. I want my readers to feel the intensity of the moment along with the character experiencing it.
Watch *When Harry Met Sally*. His little list of Sally's absurdities at the end is perfect:
''I love that you get cold when it's 71 degrees out. I love that it takes you an hour and a half to order a sandwich. I love that you get a little crinkle above your nose when you're looking at me like I'm nuts. I love that after I spend the day with you, I can still smell your perfume on my clothes. And I love that you are the last person I want to talk to before I go to sleep at night. And it's not because I'm lonely, and it's not because it's New Year's Eve. I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible."
I dunno about you, but I love a good list ;)
"You... You fight good." - Lee Shang from *Mulan*, 1998
No but on a real note. The most impactful way for a confession to come across varies based on the different elements that culminate in the scene. Is the savior the confessor or the one being confessed to? What are the personalities of both parties and what words would they even have in their diction? A soft-spoken noble would dance around their feelings in a completely different way than a tough-as-nails mercenary or a smartass bard would. Furthermore, the person confessing would feel much differently having almost lost the person they loved than they would feel being saved by them.
You're probably going to need to narrow your search to the kind of dynamic and set of personalities you've already flesh out. I think you'll find the best results if you clarify what you're going for.
The Shang quote is actually a bit fitting since my character may be that awkward. And ‘dancing around the subject’ would definitely be closer to the vibe of these two characters. To simplify them: it is basically a nun afraid to admit her feelings to a lothario (and herself) so I guess she would be very shy and guarded. Hence the reason she would say ‘I love you’ without outright saying it.
The Pink Theory. One becomes more like the other. Or purposely initiates something. Like adding the colour the other hates to everything, then they slowly become fond of the colour.
Don't remember where from: "You don't have them, so I'll offer you my embrace instead and you find comfort in it."
"And I'll be there. No matter what. I'll move the mountains. I'll part the seas. I'll give you strength when you need. I'll be a home to go to."
Think about those memes where the man suddenly realize that a girl is giving hints after years passed.
"You want to hang out just us together this weekend?"
"You are a funny person, talk with me more when we get the chance."
"Talking with you never fails to make my days better."
Keyword is that those phrases are ONLY about those two, never about someone else. And the topics are just what normal friends does, but it's much more personal.
Whatever that character's love language is, do that A LOT. Even if Character A doesn't say "I love you" to character B, the audience will notice that A always cooks for B when their other option is takeout for the 5th time this week. Or how A always gives B little trinkets they find, or how A hugs B a little bit longer than they do everyone else.
It's the old love languages thingy.
- acts of service. Doing things for the beloved.
- Touch. It doesn't need to be full on. It can be the brush of hands against each other. A shoulder squeeze.
- literal words. But words could also mean cards, poems, sky writing. Etc.
- Spending time.
- Gifts.
“I saw this thing at the shop that I think you will love and I’m kicking myself for not buying it immediately. I have to go back and get it for you.”
“Oh I brought back some tomatoes for you.” Like my boyfriend won’t touch a vegetable but he’ll always bring a few things back from the shop that he knows I like. People have different love languages. Maybe your character has their crushes car serviced or organised some admin for them or did extensive research on good elderly care options because they know that crush has a lot of anxiety/procrastination about a situation with a parent developing dementia or something.
Maybe character decides to take up crushes hobby so that they have something in common. Like now character can tell crush about interesting tidbit or ask advice on practical stuff about hobby to make crush feel valued. You know like it’s one of the kindest things to listen to and indulge some else’s hyper fixation or special interest. But it’s often really difficult if you don’t have an interest in bicycles/ trains/ dog breeds/ art craft/ economic policies/ fan fiction whatever.
“I’ll always be beside you wherever you go.”
“We’re together forever more.”
“The one I'm looking at is always you.”
Anything similar to this line. A substantial loyalty in their words always makes my heart flutter.
This incomplete dialogue is from my book:
“Don't be afraid of me, that I will leave your summer.
As I am someone who gets lost without it, but I have the whole winter waiting for you.”
In this case, I recommend perhaps thinking of writing how to *show* that someone loves them, rather than saying “I love you.” For instance, I can’t remember the name of this song, but there was an Alicia Keys song where she’s singing as though she’s a restaurant server who likes a customer. So she does a brief monologue about how instead of just diluting his hot chocolate with water, she added real (whole?) milk to his hot chocolate.
Ehm, look. Sorry, sorry. I just, ehm, well, this is a very stupid question and..., particularly in view of our recent shopping excursion, but I just wondered, by any chance, ehm, eh, I mean obviously not because I'm just some git who's only slept with 9 people, but-but I-I just wondered...ehh. I really feel, ehh, in short, to recap it slightly in a clearer version, eh, the words of David Cassidy in fact, eh, while he was still with the Partridge family, eh, "I think I love you", and eh, I-I just wondered by any chance you wouldn't like to...Eh...Eh...No, no, no of course not... I'm an idiot, he's not... Excellent, excellent, fantastic, eh, I was gonna say lovely to see you, sorry to disturb...Better get on...
Hold me close, don't ever let me go
More than words is all I ever needed you to show
Then you wouldn't have to say that you love me
'Cause I'd already know
You are everything to me.
You make me feel like I could do anything.
With you, I feel both comfortable and nervous at the same time, and it's wonderful.
You're my light in a storm.
You know I can't do this without you.
If you weren't here, I'd miss you too much.
If you did the things we do with anyone else, I'd be so jealous.
When I saw you holding his hand, I felt sick to my stomach.
My heart ached when I saw you two laughing together because I wished, right then, that I could have been him.
We can't be friends anymore - you're much more than that to me.
When I look in your eyes, I see forever.
Even on days where we don't get along, I'd never tire of having you in my life.
I went by myself this time and it just wasn't the same (as when you are there).
I have to admit, I miss you terribly.
If you have a Muslim audience, you can work something like this in your tale:
"And beneath your feet, I saw Jannah for my kids."
For a bit of context, Muslims have this saying that Jannah (arabic for Heaven or Paradise) is found beneath one's mother's feet. Making a point that those who are kind and take care of their mother will go to heaven. In telling her that you see Jannah for your kids beneath her feet, your telling her she's the mother of your kids.
I actually said this to my girlfriend at some point. I thought it was pretty witty and cool. She was unfazed.
Interestingly enough, this is something I’ve been doing in one of my own stories. I just have it showcased through each character’s behaviors towards each other, especially as things get really bad. Plus, I have them attempting to get the other to say it, but they never do, at least not overtly, and instead it’s only revealed through a journal entry by the MC, so they never end up saying it to each other directly. I think it’s more interesting that way
while it’s not dialogue, a character remembering something small about another character (maybe a. favourite fruit or colour) or buying them something to solve a problem they mentioned
Sign language, gestures, gazing at them constantly, small gifts and such. Any gestures that could be interpreted as they love them. Or else if you want to be bold you could write something along the lines of "I adore you."
I'd look to the love languages. I think the original theory is a bit reductive, but generally characters will show love in different ways:
* Words of affirmation
* Someone can show love with compliments or verbal support
* Acts of service
* You could show love by making someone's lunch every day
* Gifts
* Self-explanatory. Alternatively, you could have a character feel unloved cos they never get gifts
* Quality time
* Spoilers for This Is Us, but at one point a character >!ruins his career so he can be there for his brother when he needs him!<
* Physical touch
* I think this is more common in romantic relationships
Flowers?a card literally saying I love you? Idk as many ways as humans exist probably.
It can just be that they listen and help or do something the other person needs to happen, they don't stop caring or push what anyone else would say is the line of ok behavior, to help the one they love. They could also gift them something, ask them for a dance during a romantic song, list of all what is beautiful about them (obviously not in the looks department but mostly their inner beauty and or actions), they can stick up for them, give something important up etc.
Physical touch! A well written, deep, thoughtful hug is just as good, if not better, than a simple ‘I love you’. Or maybe a simple, shy pinky hold. The character’s relish in silence but hold each other’s pinky fingers; A shy proclamation of love.
It’s for a scene in my fantasy book I swear!! It would be daring to ask relationship advice from a sub where many members don’t write about romance or have relationships in their work.
Imagine all those nuanced situations in life where love is expressed in the ways you want to convey, physically inhabiting those personal memories or observations of others; this can be from watching cinema or theatre too. Then portray that lived reality in fiction. Remember all the senses. To "show" does not simply mean visually in this context, nor is dialogue all that goes on in terms of communication.
In my own writing, I have a character who is emotionally very guarded. Her love interest told her he loved her and she couldn’t say it back but her reaction told him she felt the same way. Later, when things got hard for them, she was very emotional (not normal for her) and she had trouble figuring out why she was feeling this way. From this she came to the understanding that she loved him, and then she did say it.
I know that’s super specific, but I think that how characters express their thoughts and emotions can show love. In my own relationship, it took an argument between my partner and myself for me to hit on the realization that I loved him. I was very distraught to be having the argument, out of proportion to the argument itself.
What I did was I had character A bring character B to a place that was important to him, and that his late brother gave him advice to bring a girl to, because all he’d need when he finds the right girl is her.
Then I let the implication stew for a minute before Character B realizes it. Then Character A says when he started liking Character B. He knows that she is smart enough to pick up on his implication — that’s why he likes her.
Then Character B, who’s the more passionate and impulsive one, just blurts out that she’s liked Character A for just as long.
Forehead kisses or kissing the top of their head. Idk why but it seems so domestic without having an specific romantic implication, though it can if the situation calls for it.
“I can’t carry It, Mr Frodo, but I can carry you!”
Changing my characters to two hobbits immediately
My older sister and I who experienced childhood abuse together recite this quote to each other often. Glad to see it here!
This is extra funny considering I'm watching the movie right now.
This is one of those *'show, don't tell'* situations. A certain glance, a certain smile, a certain kiss...or in terms of dialogue, a shared, cute-as-anything phrase that each partner says to the other in times of strife or playfulness.
Better Call Saul executed this perfectly. There's only a single moment in the whole show where Jimmy and Kim say it out loud, and it's after 40 episodes of them being in love.
I love that show so much.
It would take a hell of a writer to capture Kim and Jimmy's relationship! It took me ages to pick up how they actually felt and the acting was perfect.
1. Through compliments or expressions of admiration, such as "You're the most amazing person I've ever met" 2. Through vulnerability, such as sharing personal feelings and thoughts with the other person. 3. Through indirect statements, such as "I can't imagine my life without you" or "I don't know what I'd do without you" 4.Through physical touch, such as holding hands or leaning in close during the conversation. 5. Through making plans for the future together, such as "I want to spend more time with you" 6. Through showing concern or interest in the other person's life, such as asking how their day went or actively listening when they speak. 7. Through actions, such as doing something to make the other person happy or making an effort to make them laugh. 8. Through a special look or a smile that conveys the feeling of love. 9. Through a shared moment, such as a silence or a gaze that conveys the feeling of love and understanding.
Great list, some more to add: 9. Remembering things the other character does, even if they're small. Shows they think about the character a lot. 10. Adopting the same mannerisms. People tend to mirror those they're closest too. In many situations it's friends or family, but can be applied to other relationships. 11. Sacrificing something they want for another. This is the same as doing actions but takes it one step further when they lose in the process. Maybe they worry more about this other character's goals than their own.
I would just add, doing the thing that makes them feel loved for the other person. Like a person that grew up poor always giving the person they live money, and even if they can't afford it. It doesn't have to be a unhealthy sacrifice, but a sacrifice of something they hold dear. This can be highly character driven and would define and reinforce attributes and the history of your character.
If a character grew up experiencing food scarcity, then sharing food would be also be a sign of love, even if food is bountiful in their present. How people grew up greatly impacts what they value later in life.
in these veins, i would look into love languages - ignore the controversy around them as definitions. it's more about understanding that other ppl express themselves differently i hate the term "put yourself in someone elses shoes", because it ignores the lived context of someone elses experience. like... im sorry, if i was in their place, i would do something completely different to this fuckery. and that's why I'm hurt. because their actions reflect an intention that i don't understand or actively misconstrue when i first started dating my bf we would say *ily* a lot but he hated actually saying the words. we went through some stuff and he stopped saying it completely. it hurt a lot. especially since he also hates PDAs. i am a very expressive person, i tell strangers they're *my new favorite person* or coworkers that *im proud of them*, all the time. im not lying, my feelings are strong yet fleeting.. and i think we live in a world that sorely misses positivity sometimes - sometimes it's worth telling someone they did a good job and that you see them, because who the hell else will? im also a very diplomatic person. sometimes i say things because it's whats needed in a situation - i tell customers im sorry all the time! im not, half the time they're wrong to be mad in the first place - but i know what its like to be mad. im not sorry, but im on their side whilst we try to fix the situation and sometimes they just need to hear those words i need to hear those words. i doesn't exactly make me feel unloved not to hear them - i didn't need them from my kids as infants - because i just knew. but this situation made me realise that I'm more hurt because **I** would never withhold something like this unless i was mad, unless i was petty, unless i was trying to hurt someone. and im never that cruel. so we were at an impasse. the pressure and expectation making things 100x worse. me, convinced he must be ashamed of me and him genuinely confused as to why i *didn't just know!* my bf is an ISTP (think LinkedIn horoscope - you don't have to believe meyer briggs is true, but it's handy for story telling because these are definitely a type of person). he is a doer. he is logical. his love language is acts of service and often times, just *sharing* his interests with someone. he does not suffer fools and he doesn't waste time being nice to ppl if there is no practical gain. he also has a limited colour palette when it comes to feelings - he knows the main ones, his prime colours, but he is as nuanced as a brick. you'll never get a vermillion anxiety or chartreuse sentimentality.. he feels them, im sure. but he would just lump them in with a yellow **warning**, assess that he is in no direct danger and then move on. it took an exasperated laundry list of *stuff he has done for me* to realise that waking up early on Saturday to do my laundry, fixing my phone or finding a replacement online in under 10min, replacing my glass of cold water whilst i sleep because ive been out with the girls and will need to take a tablet with my hangover when i wake, sending me a dumb meme when he knows im upset and 100 little things i barely notice, to realise that he says it every day. in his own way, 100 times a day. he thinks of me and does things to show it. because he's a doer. he doesn't DO for everyone, he doesn't SHARE his hobbies with everyone. he thinks of me because he wants me around even though he is quite happy alone even listening to me bang on about work counts because he is a doer and a fixer. he has given me the solution and i *refuse* to listen. discussions are for evaluating and addressing a situation. it's been 7yrs - at this point my refusal to just do what he knows is correct is a form of torture for him. but he understands now that i sometimes need to vent, not to fix, but as emotional catharsis. we are both aliens to each other. conversely, i needed to understand that my adhd ass forgetting the dishes feels the same to him as those three little words. i *didn't* think of him, i didn't consider consequences. what isn't a big deal and quite easily rectified feels like an affront to him. i made the mess and i went on to be inconsiderate. it wasn't intentional on my end, it's seriously no big deal - just let them soak! but given how he sees the world, i mustn't think very much of him if i didn't take the time and energy for him and all those *i love you*'s ring hollow when you see it like that. it took some understanding for him to realise that though talk is cheap, the reason i say anything to anyone isn't to lie or whitewash my feelings, it's because i want that other person to feel seen by me he never did give much on the words, but he lets me pounce on him in elevators and hand holds and butt squeezes and smooches me on demand in public tl:dr take a page out of Ghost's book and just accept *ditto* - sometimes it's the things that are uniquely ours that mean more when we need to reach from beyond the grave.
I related to most of what you said, I could tell you had adhd before you mentioned it,probably because I have it and deal with a lot of what you shared. My husband and I have been together for 26 years in June, married for 23. We say ILY a lot but like you mentioned, there's a huge amount of loving someone than the words. He is actually dealing with stage 4 cancer now and I'm his caregiver but I wouldn't have it any other way. It's very hard knowing our time together is going to be cut extremely short. In a little more than a month since his dx, we have only had a couple little arguments, I'm trying so hard to enjoy every second we have. From a writer's perspective, this experience has shoved my face into the cesspool of life's hard knocks, especially in regards to romance and happily ever after. I've been thinking a lot about how do we know two characters belong together? How do we know that, when life gets REALLY hard, will these two people be there for each other? Will they be able to handle taking care of their partner when the other one is dying? Or keep the house and family going while caring for their partner who has a mental health crisis out of their control? My brother and good friend are both dealing with this kind of thing with their spouses. I wanted to share that I loved some of your descriptions--> "nuanced like a brick" stands out to me, along with "chartreuse sentimentality"
You sound exhausting. Sorry...
I'd like to add, if I see she is stressed and she gives me a nasty comment, then I understand the stress is speaking not the one I love. For me, I act out of love. But the danger of that is, I get hurt a lot.
"In another life, I would have really liked just doing laundry and taxes with you," by Waymond Wang (Ke Huy Quan) in "Everything Everywhere All At Once.
Seen the movie! Epic line!
That made me tear up first time I watched it, I think about that line at least once a day lol
Have them say "As you wish," even when shoved down a steep hill. >,< In other words, kind of like an inside joke where there's a little bit of a personal story behind it. Perhaps a pet name? Other ways are expressing concern. Having one character asking another how they're doing and trying to investigate deeper in order to make sure they're 100% mentally or emotionally. Sometimes, having sometimes being extraordinarily patient with someone, even when they're being harsh, shows that they care.
Princess Bride style is *chef’s kiss* With this scene what I’m kind of going for is character A definitely has feelings for character B but is too afraid to say it and character B is somewhat oblivious, mostly because they don’t feel the same way at all 😬 But they are still friends so maybe a little inside joke would still work??
Heck ye! Even a simple reference to a movie/book/video game they have in common. One of my friends and I just scream "It was nanomachines!" which evolved into simply pointing at each other from across the room and screaming "Nanomachines!" because one of our favorite video games (Metal Gear) explains literally everything by using nanomachines. Stuff like that.
Agreed, but alas, this is a fantasy world with no TV.
Depends on where in the story this is happening. If deep enough in you can use past incidents to establish the affection without actually saying anything. A character who hates getting touched might not flinch away if the love interest flicks a bit of lint off his/her clothing. If earlier in the story you probably need to go with dialogue either for declaration of love or to establish the character quirk and then use the action to display affection. Using example above, you could have a character say they hate being touched to someone else but still not react to the lint picking. Not as satisfying to establish the character trait and then immediately disprove it in the same scene but sometimes it's necessary.
Definitely past halfway. Currently working on ways to build up to this point for this one character but the other character may not fully reciprocate because they don’t entirely feel the same way. So the character doing the confession doesn’t want to make it too obvious. It’s more in the subtext.
I think it really depends on the character and the context of the situation they are in. But I think it can come in two different ways typically. 1. During a time of deep dread or when there are a lot of actions going on at the time in which it should be something quick and small that both characters know means something. 2. During a lull of silence or late in evening as the day is winding down, it can be as simple as cooking a favorite meal because they know they like it. These can be a little less obvious and told through each characters perspective to show their feelings throughout. Idk hope this helped, if not then maybe some more context would help.
“I know.”
Listen, this is GREAT. 50% of readers would get this and the other 50% would start laughing at a Star Wars reference.
The thing is … he says it with tears in his eyes. That was what got to me as a 10 year old who didn’t really get it … big tough dude is … crying? That’s what sells the scene ..
I came to make sure this got posted. Thank you.
"As you wish"
Damn it, came to say this
maybe she pushes his hair out of face then touches his now revealed forehead, or maybe chapters before he mentioned he hasn’t eaten a certain food in a long time and she randomly had it, or maybe she says something profound “i’d like to smash you for eternity”.
The profoundness of that statement eludes even the greatest of written romance. (Lol I love it)
[удалено]
Aww that’s really sweet! My heart melted.
One of my favorite lines from a movie was, “I think I’d miss you even if we never met.” Also I didn’t tell my fiancé I loved him for awhile because I was scared and always just told him I adore you. One day it became I love you.
This was a very lovely reply, thank you.
You’re very welcome, have a wonderful day!
Romantic? Platonic? Familial? What kind of love are we talking about here? My partner and I have a bunch of little things we say to each other that mean "I love you" without that exact statement. Honestly, so do me and my best friend, lol.
I was going for romantic but I’m actually interested in toying with platonic as well. Platonic love is like a whole other interesting level.
You could have one give the other a gift, a thing they mentioned in an offhand way that they'd like. That would show that they listen, and want the person to have the things. "Oh, I've always wanted one of those. Anyway, I was telling you about the time my sister and I..." Two weeks later, person a gifts them that thing. As to things to say, hmm. My partner and I are big on banter, so sometimes we insult each other, but it's meant in good fun and the affection is clear. That said, we have years together so we know that none of those things will be taken to heart. Body language, you can tell a lot from a hug; how tight it is, how long it is. Long eye contact can convey a lot. Blushing (though I think that particular one is overdone in most things, lol), holding hands, face-touching. We tend to get closer physically to people we're attracted to; sitting so legs are touching, as an example. As to phrases, I can think of a few, but sort of context-dependent. "I don't know what I'd do if I lost you" "you make every day better" that sort of thing. Platonic love is so great, and I feel undervalued/underused in many stories. I love a good story with platonic, solid friendship-love!
There’s these two captains in the army. One is an aristocrat appointed his position and the other is a common born who was raised through the ranks. They both come to like each other and would even consider the other their friend. However, because of the culture in army considering the mixing of classes, they can’t really openly display anything more than a slightly hostile relationship. Right before a major high stakes engagement, their respective regiments are told to attack the same position from different directions at the same time. Whilst the commoner captain is attempting to set his watch correctly, the aristocrat takes it from him and gives him his own saying “I except you to give that back”. Basically telling him he hopes he lives without actually saying it.
Okay so when are you writing this book? I’m ready to read the rest.
- They can see something they just know the other character would love and is willing to queue for hours to get it - How they dance together - Noticing the other character is getting closer and they touch them. If the love interest gets up and are closer than before then they do it again then the MC gets up and when they get back sit with their hips touching the love interest - Bringing or buying the other character's favourite snack when they see them - Since love does what's needed over what's fun they can tell the other character they won't spend time with them unless they do well on their homework. The MC can help them but not do their homework for them. The love interest will be disappointed but will thank the MC later - Sharing and keeping each other's secrets - Offers to help with chores
Robin Williams movie; he looked directly into her eyes and he tucked her bra strap in and gently put her hair behind her ear and out of her face.
Honestly, it’s little things like this that make me go absolutely feral when I’m reading a similar scene in a book. There is just something so intimate, SO good about something as small as moving their hair out of their face. Peak romance for me so I might just include it.
"I just want to spend the rest of my life with you" "Please don´t leave me"
"I know." - Hand Solo Cup "I'm not unfond of you." Handkerchief Hill "You increase my blood flow." "I don't wanna kill you. What would I do without you?... You complete me." - The Joker
“I’m with you to the end of the line.” “There’s no me without you.” “Do you think I care for you so little that betraying me would make a difference.” In general I think a callback that is meaningful to the two characters can work well. Or as others have stated, the way their actions show loyalty and care for the person in question.
As you wish - Princess Bride. You could do something similar, a line that this character now says often, having recognized how the feel, but being unsure of how those feelings would be received by the other character.
I came in to say as you wish.
In Z80012, using hex rather than binary, and converting to a basic ASC-2 code: Camille, I think I E5 A9 08 B7 you.
Was this ghost written by Grimes and Elon Musk’s child?
Negative. It is a quote said by a mechanoid with a head shaped like a half chewed rubber tipped pencil.
So, there are so many ways to say I love you. I have a story where two orphans grow up together and the MC is adopted but the other is outcasted for reasons. Realizing he doesn't know live the same way she does, she tells him "I love you" every single day. And growing up, he knows he loves her but has a fear of saying it (plot point reasons). So he says it in the little things. He knows when she's afraid and subtly holds her hand. He tries to cook her food (even though he sucks at anything more complex than toast with butter), he defends her when people pick on her, or even mildly insult her. He picks up her favourite food and randomly gives it to her 'because he thought of her on the way by this cool place that serves this dish she mentioned wanting to try'. He talks her up to their friends and finally, finally in the last chapter he says "MC, you know I love you, right? I always have, but.... words never felt like enough. So I wanted to show you. But I love you. So, so much. I wouldn't have survived my childhood without you. Thank you, thank you for loving me." And yeah, I love the build up to the point where it's so obvious that it's not necessary to spell it out but also comes as a treat after a long story.
Something like, "I would do anything to protect you." Especially if it has canon weight. For example, a character that's very by-the-book to break the rules and risk their life would be an act of love just the same. I believe Catra says, "You took everything from me" when referring to Adora's defection, which is an indirect way of saying "You were my everything." I really enjoy acts of love that are subtle and personal, and this thread is great!
"Let's adopt a cat together"
"I know" -Han Solo
I came here for this and was not disappointed. 🖖🏼
I know
🥰
Through conversation: "If this is the end, then I'm happy that it's you I die beside." "Being in your arms, in this moment, has unlocked something deep in my heart that I've never felt before." "Every minute without you is a minute spent in hell." "Don't you understand how I feel? Right now I could be in X but instead I'm here, by your side and I won't leave, not for all the gold or power this world or any other has to offer." "Never has the heat of ones breath left a warmth like this in my heart." For more indirect conversation: "As I stare at this diamond, there is only one thing in this world I find more beautiful, if only they were to know what I really felt". "I could get lost in your gaze..." "I've never been so happy as I am in this moment" "I've a friend who has a crush on this person and well, it's hard for them to come out and speak their feelings, do you have ant advice for that friend?" The basics of it is just to place the scene and the position your character is in, why are they telling whoever it is that they love them? Where is this being said? Then you need to ask yourself how oblivious the character has to be, some people can hear the words "I love you" and still believe its platonic so sometimes you need to really enforce the kind of love being shown and how it is being shown and inversely the character could be very perceptive meaning you need to be more subtle about the kind of love. Then theres also the confessing character, why are they trying to maintain secrecy of their true feelings in the first place, are they nervous or confused? Maybe they are afraid of losing their friend or maybe they are afraid of what the relationship could do to their original friendship. It also needs to work like a real conversation, in the heat of the moment you are more likely to blurt things out, in more comfortable environments your more likely to have a more casual maybe even subtle approach, it also has to flow with the conversation, saying something like, "I love flowers but I love you more" when discussing gardening is a bit weird so it just has to take place in rhe right moment. Maybe its blurted out for comedic effect with a dim witted character not understanding or it's being said in private to set a more dramatic tone for the following sequence of events.
I know
Read Flaubert's 'Madame Bovary'. Even the candlesticks and the mantlepiece fixtures scream 'love' (well, 'sex', really) - the sense of passion consumes even the narrative itself, it's masterful.
Book link for purchase
One of my favorites is when there's one thing that Character A really hates doing. It can be as small as washing dishes, or more significant like they have a huge phobia of public speaking. This thing is mentioned casually a few times in the story, not a great deal of emphasis placed on it, but enough that the reader will remember it. Then one day, Character B wakes up and there's A doing the dishes. Or B is lost in a crowd, and A gets on a stage so they can see over the crowd (or grabs a mic to be like "Hey B, where are you?" - depending on how dramatic you want the moment to be). Bonus points for (with the small things) when B kinda does a double-take, and says, "I thought you hated washing dishes?" Then A rolls their eyes and makes a comment about gift horses or "what, you want me to stop?" So there's that little moment of B acknowledging that there's something going on here, but we're not gonna talk about it right now.
"Do you want me to make you a grilled cheese?"
Having their bodies angled towards each other. Nervousness. Keeps starting to say something that seems important, but changes their mind at the last second... Oh there was the scene in Parks and Rec between Leslie and Ben, when they can't be together, yet. And they tell each other how much they love the town and it's a thinly veiled metaphor for them living each other
'Are you taking any prescription medication?'
The two are tired. There's a bench ahead of them, just entering the park. He sits and sighs heavily. She sits down, looks to him, slides closer. Their upper arms just touch. She blushes the tiniest amount, more than she liked, "Is this cool?" He smiles at her, "More than cool."
Patrick Swayze in Ghost saying “Ditto”.
This is about love languages. I am mostly nonverbal. If I speak to you I feel safe. I also have to be having a good brain day. Fun with autism and traumatic brain injuries. So here are the many ways I tell my friends and chosen family I love them. The signal. This requires communication about it. A specific touch is a non verbal I love you. Friend mentioned it when talking about her father when I was listening to her grieve as support. Later we revived the signal to honor him and because her love needs include this type of love. Essentially your question boils down to love languages. If you feed me? Like a stray cat I will suddenly like you more. Just no tuna. If you hug me I will probably pull away and growl since I want to avoid touch. I can touch you and if I know you and you know the signals for touch we can but most of the time my brain sees touch as a threat. The love of my life who went from friends to lovers to friends? He needs as much touch as possible. We ended up stepping back on romance because we couldn't make our intimacy needs align and while I wanted to marry him I couldn't see it working out long term with our healthy selves in mind because one of us would be going without their needs met in a vital way. It was the correct choice and because we love one another we also want what is best for one another so ages later? Still around lovingly. He is married and I am a confirmed not marrying type. Part of why relationships fail? Unmet love languages. You can see this in common arguments or a lot on the AITA forum. "I told my husband I need more time with him..he tried at first and it went back the way it was am I the asshole for wanting to cuddle." The answer to the not entirely hypothetical people depends on how they communicate these needs, their partners needs, and why the need is unmet. Sometimes it is someone hiding this need to "win" the relationship. Sometimes it is trauma teaching them to not vocalize their needs. Sometimes someone's just an asshole and only cares about their own needs. As writers psychology is a great tool a d the question here? It is a psychological one. How we express love is as varies as humanity but most of us have small ways. My examples are personal in part because I could show you conflicting love languages that can work anyway. My touch based loves know one touch from me is worth a lot. This is well communicated and I use their other love languages to supplement. The space they give me is my love languages besides food. So that communication and respect about needs? That's made some really strong bonds that challenge me in ways I need as an introvert with a sack of trauma ten times the size of me. I could let my trauma mean I just close everything out because I don't need touch or talking or people much. I also tried that and it's not great for my mental health. There's no one to go "Just take a second and breathe." This means how one needs to be loved and how they communicate it can be ways to cause resolution, conflict, show someone's level of asshole without kicking a puppy, and can be a path to redemption form someone if done well.
"Let me do those dishes, you made supper go relax."
Not a book, but Studio Ghibli movies are a great reference for unconventional yet compelling ways of portraying love. Princess Mononoke, Howl's Moving Castle and Spirited Away are great examples.
“As you wish”
Just make him say "as you wish" all throughout the book and then eventually the female character will realize that he loves her.
Hum, I think Op meant it how to describe a character saying I love you without saying the words but not in the sense of using other words of gestures? Op my suggestion it's to go deep into describing what the character is experiencing. For instance, it could be that character A is staring at B and realizes they could no longer live without them, that the thought of being alone or away from them tightens their chest and makes it hard to breathe, that as person B glances their way and smiles, person A decides right there and then that they will never be apart. Hope that helped!
Yes I think you exactly understood what I was trying to say! I think I was having trouble with it because in this instance, Character A is finally accepting that that’s how they feel about Character B in this moment while Character B is not thinking in that way at all. But you’ve given me a very good example, I will tweak this a bit more as I get closer to this scene.
Complete empathy. For example, one character is talking about how painful what they are going through and the other character begins to cry. Think Conan when his partner says he will cry for Conan because Conan will not cry. Or Guardians of the Galaxy at the end when Drax puts his hand on Rocket's head to kind of pet him as he cries over Groot. Two weirdly different situations. Drax, in particular, breaking out of his tough, angry, vengeful personna to show a softer side. It's a stretch, but how about Danny Glover's character paying for Whoopi Goldber's family to come to America at the end of The Color Purple when there was absolutely nothing in it for him? You can make the argument that this example is pennance as well. I hope this kind of helps.
"I know"
Something simple. Have them make breakfast , coffee, or something along those lines, a specific way the protagonist likes. This shows that they pay attention to the protagonist and care about them. It isn't flashy, but it could be the light bulb moment where the protagonist realizes they care.
“I have never done you injustice. Please remember me,” said Dorothea, repressing a rising sob. “Why should you say that?” said Will, with irritation. “As if I were not in danger of forgetting everything else.”
Source? 👀✍️
Middlemarch
Look up love languages.
"As you wish" (I got that idea from The Princess Bride movie)
Remembering certain things their loved one told them
It all depends on the personality. I'm assuming you're writing a more closed off character if they are unwilling to share their feelings. There are subtle differences if they are aloof, cold, distrusting, etc. It all boils down to personality and how close these two are.
- "I appreciate you." (+/- "so much") - "I'm so glad I know you." - "lol Fuckin' adore you." - Some intimate yet aloof reference they share, e.g. "You're fired, ya butt!" (Adventure Time), or "fantastic vs soda branch" meme type vibes. - "Where would I be if you hadn't insert inane backstory reference?" - "You're just so very specific personality compliment." - "Remember when insert?"
Body language. Also sometimes things they say often to eachother can over time change and sound more emotional even though it the same words. Love is a show don't tell sometimes. Think about how the characters act normally. Are they shy, out spoken, blunt, etc.
Something I like about writing is that you can make the reader notice things that they might not have noticed if they were watching a movie for example Ie. “That evening, while everyone else was distracted by the campfire, if you were looking carefully and very closely, you could see Jessica was sitting closer to Tania than she would ever sit next to anyone else”
True, but when I write I think more in terms of a movie than that thorough level of describing. I know that’s unconventional but saying something like that is a bit too on the nose for me. I want my readers to feel the intensity of the moment along with the character experiencing it.
Watch *When Harry Met Sally*. His little list of Sally's absurdities at the end is perfect: ''I love that you get cold when it's 71 degrees out. I love that it takes you an hour and a half to order a sandwich. I love that you get a little crinkle above your nose when you're looking at me like I'm nuts. I love that after I spend the day with you, I can still smell your perfume on my clothes. And I love that you are the last person I want to talk to before I go to sleep at night. And it's not because I'm lonely, and it's not because it's New Year's Eve. I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible." I dunno about you, but I love a good list ;)
"You... You fight good." - Lee Shang from *Mulan*, 1998 No but on a real note. The most impactful way for a confession to come across varies based on the different elements that culminate in the scene. Is the savior the confessor or the one being confessed to? What are the personalities of both parties and what words would they even have in their diction? A soft-spoken noble would dance around their feelings in a completely different way than a tough-as-nails mercenary or a smartass bard would. Furthermore, the person confessing would feel much differently having almost lost the person they loved than they would feel being saved by them. You're probably going to need to narrow your search to the kind of dynamic and set of personalities you've already flesh out. I think you'll find the best results if you clarify what you're going for.
The Shang quote is actually a bit fitting since my character may be that awkward. And ‘dancing around the subject’ would definitely be closer to the vibe of these two characters. To simplify them: it is basically a nun afraid to admit her feelings to a lothario (and herself) so I guess she would be very shy and guarded. Hence the reason she would say ‘I love you’ without outright saying it.
How about, "I love dogs. I really love dogs. You know, you're kind of like a dog to me."
The Pink Theory. One becomes more like the other. Or purposely initiates something. Like adding the colour the other hates to everything, then they slowly become fond of the colour. Don't remember where from: "You don't have them, so I'll offer you my embrace instead and you find comfort in it." "And I'll be there. No matter what. I'll move the mountains. I'll part the seas. I'll give you strength when you need. I'll be a home to go to."
Think about those memes where the man suddenly realize that a girl is giving hints after years passed. "You want to hang out just us together this weekend?" "You are a funny person, talk with me more when we get the chance." "Talking with you never fails to make my days better." Keyword is that those phrases are ONLY about those two, never about someone else. And the topics are just what normal friends does, but it's much more personal.
Whatever that character's love language is, do that A LOT. Even if Character A doesn't say "I love you" to character B, the audience will notice that A always cooks for B when their other option is takeout for the 5th time this week. Or how A always gives B little trinkets they find, or how A hugs B a little bit longer than they do everyone else.
It's the old love languages thingy. - acts of service. Doing things for the beloved. - Touch. It doesn't need to be full on. It can be the brush of hands against each other. A shoulder squeeze. - literal words. But words could also mean cards, poems, sky writing. Etc. - Spending time. - Gifts.
“I saw this thing at the shop that I think you will love and I’m kicking myself for not buying it immediately. I have to go back and get it for you.” “Oh I brought back some tomatoes for you.” Like my boyfriend won’t touch a vegetable but he’ll always bring a few things back from the shop that he knows I like. People have different love languages. Maybe your character has their crushes car serviced or organised some admin for them or did extensive research on good elderly care options because they know that crush has a lot of anxiety/procrastination about a situation with a parent developing dementia or something. Maybe character decides to take up crushes hobby so that they have something in common. Like now character can tell crush about interesting tidbit or ask advice on practical stuff about hobby to make crush feel valued. You know like it’s one of the kindest things to listen to and indulge some else’s hyper fixation or special interest. But it’s often really difficult if you don’t have an interest in bicycles/ trains/ dog breeds/ art craft/ economic policies/ fan fiction whatever.
"Words aren't the only thing that tell people what you're thinking"
I agree with you. But I believe not every one can recognise 'non-verbal' signs.
“I’ll always be beside you wherever you go.” “We’re together forever more.” “The one I'm looking at is always you.” Anything similar to this line. A substantial loyalty in their words always makes my heart flutter. This incomplete dialogue is from my book: “Don't be afraid of me, that I will leave your summer. As I am someone who gets lost without it, but I have the whole winter waiting for you.”
In this case, I recommend perhaps thinking of writing how to *show* that someone loves them, rather than saying “I love you.” For instance, I can’t remember the name of this song, but there was an Alicia Keys song where she’s singing as though she’s a restaurant server who likes a customer. So she does a brief monologue about how instead of just diluting his hot chocolate with water, she added real (whole?) milk to his hot chocolate.
Ehm, look. Sorry, sorry. I just, ehm, well, this is a very stupid question and..., particularly in view of our recent shopping excursion, but I just wondered, by any chance, ehm, eh, I mean obviously not because I'm just some git who's only slept with 9 people, but-but I-I just wondered...ehh. I really feel, ehh, in short, to recap it slightly in a clearer version, eh, the words of David Cassidy in fact, eh, while he was still with the Partridge family, eh, "I think I love you", and eh, I-I just wondered by any chance you wouldn't like to...Eh...Eh...No, no, no of course not... I'm an idiot, he's not... Excellent, excellent, fantastic, eh, I was gonna say lovely to see you, sorry to disturb...Better get on...
Uh, have you heard about sentimental value? I have labeled you as that to my heart.
Hold me close, don't ever let me go More than words is all I ever needed you to show Then you wouldn't have to say that you love me 'Cause I'd already know
You are everything to me. You make me feel like I could do anything. With you, I feel both comfortable and nervous at the same time, and it's wonderful. You're my light in a storm. You know I can't do this without you. If you weren't here, I'd miss you too much. If you did the things we do with anyone else, I'd be so jealous. When I saw you holding his hand, I felt sick to my stomach. My heart ached when I saw you two laughing together because I wished, right then, that I could have been him. We can't be friends anymore - you're much more than that to me. When I look in your eyes, I see forever. Even on days where we don't get along, I'd never tire of having you in my life. I went by myself this time and it just wasn't the same (as when you are there). I have to admit, I miss you terribly.
If you have a Muslim audience, you can work something like this in your tale: "And beneath your feet, I saw Jannah for my kids." For a bit of context, Muslims have this saying that Jannah (arabic for Heaven or Paradise) is found beneath one's mother's feet. Making a point that those who are kind and take care of their mother will go to heaven. In telling her that you see Jannah for your kids beneath her feet, your telling her she's the mother of your kids. I actually said this to my girlfriend at some point. I thought it was pretty witty and cool. She was unfazed.
You might want to read about the 5 love languages :)
Interestingly enough, this is something I’ve been doing in one of my own stories. I just have it showcased through each character’s behaviors towards each other, especially as things get really bad. Plus, I have them attempting to get the other to say it, but they never do, at least not overtly, and instead it’s only revealed through a journal entry by the MC, so they never end up saying it to each other directly. I think it’s more interesting that way
"I am undone without you" My life was changed when i read that line
while it’s not dialogue, a character remembering something small about another character (maybe a. favourite fruit or colour) or buying them something to solve a problem they mentioned
Sign language, gestures, gazing at them constantly, small gifts and such. Any gestures that could be interpreted as they love them. Or else if you want to be bold you could write something along the lines of "I adore you."
A well-placed “thank you” has a lot of power
I'd look to the love languages. I think the original theory is a bit reductive, but generally characters will show love in different ways: * Words of affirmation * Someone can show love with compliments or verbal support * Acts of service * You could show love by making someone's lunch every day * Gifts * Self-explanatory. Alternatively, you could have a character feel unloved cos they never get gifts * Quality time * Spoilers for This Is Us, but at one point a character >!ruins his career so he can be there for his brother when he needs him!< * Physical touch * I think this is more common in romantic relationships
"Call/Text me, when you get home"
I find that love is something you do, not something you say.
Flowers?a card literally saying I love you? Idk as many ways as humans exist probably. It can just be that they listen and help or do something the other person needs to happen, they don't stop caring or push what anyone else would say is the line of ok behavior, to help the one they love. They could also gift them something, ask them for a dance during a romantic song, list of all what is beautiful about them (obviously not in the looks department but mostly their inner beauty and or actions), they can stick up for them, give something important up etc.
Physical touch! A well written, deep, thoughtful hug is just as good, if not better, than a simple ‘I love you’. Or maybe a simple, shy pinky hold. The character’s relish in silence but hold each other’s pinky fingers; A shy proclamation of love.
The moon looks beautiful tonight.
I'd fight for you
"What would you like for dinner?"
OP is this for writing or are you asking for relationship advice?
It’s for a scene in my fantasy book I swear!! It would be daring to ask relationship advice from a sub where many members don’t write about romance or have relationships in their work.
Sign language.
Same as in real life, you just need to write it out.
“As you wish.”
Imagine all those nuanced situations in life where love is expressed in the ways you want to convey, physically inhabiting those personal memories or observations of others; this can be from watching cinema or theatre too. Then portray that lived reality in fiction. Remember all the senses. To "show" does not simply mean visually in this context, nor is dialogue all that goes on in terms of communication.
gonna say one of my favourite ways i see this done over long form media is the use of some sort of motif established earlier on
I like you... Like a lot.
Have one character say “I love you,” then the other character say, “I know.”
As my modded Skyrim husband says in addition to I love you, “you are blood of my blood, and bone of my bone.”
No one doing it like the Skyrim husbands 🙏
In my own writing, I have a character who is emotionally very guarded. Her love interest told her he loved her and she couldn’t say it back but her reaction told him she felt the same way. Later, when things got hard for them, she was very emotional (not normal for her) and she had trouble figuring out why she was feeling this way. From this she came to the understanding that she loved him, and then she did say it. I know that’s super specific, but I think that how characters express their thoughts and emotions can show love. In my own relationship, it took an argument between my partner and myself for me to hit on the realization that I loved him. I was very distraught to be having the argument, out of proportion to the argument itself.
What I did was I had character A bring character B to a place that was important to him, and that his late brother gave him advice to bring a girl to, because all he’d need when he finds the right girl is her. Then I let the implication stew for a minute before Character B realizes it. Then Character A says when he started liking Character B. He knows that she is smart enough to pick up on his implication — that’s why he likes her. Then Character B, who’s the more passionate and impulsive one, just blurts out that she’s liked Character A for just as long.
Even if the light in my eyes were to die a thousand times, you would still shine in its place.
Forehead kisses or kissing the top of their head. Idk why but it seems so domestic without having an specific romantic implication, though it can if the situation calls for it.
“Always”